Children of Leaders
by TheCatsMeow16
Summary: It's the year 2033, and the world is very different. Four youths struggle between following in the footsteps of their parents, or facing the consequences. When Sakura Kinomoto, the daughter of a disgraced journalist, enters into a risky affair with a soldier, she must decide between playing her part in Utopia, or aiding to overturn a corrupt government.
1. The Journalist's Daughter

**I haven't written a Fanfic in years**

 **I just recently got the urge to write again.**

 **Enjoy.**

I was six years old when the takeover happened.

People say I was much too young to remember such a thing, but they're wrong. That grave and terrible time still plays quietly in the corners of my brain. Sometimes I dream about it, and sometimes I conjure up my own images that could piece it all together. But there are dark patches, unsolved pieces.

I'm a logical person. I deal with facts, I don't fantasize about what _may_ have happened. Therefore, my memories and dreams are not simply my imagination, they must be pockets of information struggling to align themselves in correct order, and I have to know what happened, why it happened. I'm obsessed with it.

It happened November 1st 2017. The large and prosperous, arguably _too_ prosperous city of Tomoeda became an independent state governed by its own elected people with the common aim to work towards creating our own Utopia, our own sanctuary with no outside influence.

That's what the textbooks tell you.

But that's not how it is.

The truth is on November 1st 2017, the military claimed the city of Tomeda an independent state. We, the citizens, were voiceless in this matter. The common motto of Tomeda is 'to maintain the state of Utopia'. However, how can one maintain Utopia when there are a few rotton eggs in the mix? Easy, you divide them up, stop the contamination. Put people in their place.

There was the military of course, the iron fist of Tomeda. They establish order, make sure we're all playing our part in Utopia, and making sure no one mixed in where they weren't supposed to be. We never expected the walls to go up so quickly, it only took one night and one day to enclose us all. The walls weren't just around the city, it separated us into our zones.

At the north, you had the monarch. The royal family, who play a representative role for Tomeda. They are one of the few who can leave Tomeda. Of course, what good is it to be royalty without your upper class minions. The best of the best live in the North. Celebrities, scholars, artists, directors and many more of that sort lived there and so did their children, and their children's children and so on.

In the South is the military. The military has its own community, and its own set of benefits. Better housing, luxuries, and enough weapons to make you think twice about complaining about it.

I'm told that I am fortunate enough to be born in the East. That is where the good citizens live. Here, we have education, the chance to work, a chance to play our part in Utopia, a chance to be another cog in relentless Tomoedan regime machine.

Some people refer to the people of the West as rebels. Some older people will say they're murderers, tricksters or worst of all, anti- Tomedan. Rebels. It is a reminder to those who think twice about rebelling, it could be worse.

Who am I?

I'm Sakura Kinomoto. I am the journalist's daughter, and I will find the truth.

Even if it kills me.

...X...X...X...X...

"Sakura, please. Can't you just do what you're told for once?"

Sakura sighed and looked up from her notebook. Her father hadn't stopped pacing around the house since six a.m. and wasn't showing any signs of slowing down. She didn't reply and gazed back down at her notebook, disappointed at the blank page in front of her. Even she found it hard to concentrate.

"Sakura?" her father asked again, only raising his voice slightly.

She blew hot air out of her cheeks and semi-rolled her eyes.

"Dad, for the last time, no. I'm fine the way I am."

"I know you are honey, but just for today, just for the next hour can you please just …not be yourself?"

He didn't mean that as an insult, Sakura knew that. But he was also asking lot out of her. Her father walked over to a photo frame, adjusted it, then unadjusted it. Her tutted to himself with frustration. This was getting to him a lot more that Sakura thought it would.

"Dad they're not going to write us up just because I'm not wearing a dress." She said throwing her hands out in frustration.

She hated to wear dresses, or skirts or most things that threw her into the feminine world. She knew that today she'd be expected to present herself in a certain way. But she kept herself awake all night long thinking of how wrong it all was, stewing in anger.

Fujitaka ran a hand threw his hair and twitched his foot. He wasn't frustrated with her. He was frustrated with the whole situation. Who could blame him. The general was coming to _their_ house. This rarely happened and when it did, there was certain strict protocol to follow, and Sakura was adamant not to follow. He looked over at his daughter in her rugged maroon trousers and faded grey shirt. Not appropriate wear for a visit from the general. What could he do? She was a twenty-two year old girl- strike that, a twenty two year old women. Too old to be disciplined now.

"Sakura." He said in a smaller, gentler voice. He came over and placed his hands on her shoulders. "Please." He begged.

He scanned her eyes, which were fierce, green and full of something that sometimes made him worry about her. After a twenty second stare-off, she caved.

"Fine." She said curtly. "But this is wrong. All wrong."

Her dad didn't deny it. But it was what it was.

Five minutes later Sakura reappeared into the kitchen. Her father smiled in relief when he seen her. She wore a light blue dress appropriately cut at the knee. She tamed her wild brown hair into a high bun but her rebellious fringe fell across her eyes.

Fujitaka stood with his hands behind his back, his posture poker straight. Sakura fell in line beside him, imitating his stance beside him. Her heart started to beat faster with nerves. Why was she nervous? She has known this day would come for a long, long time. She even counted down the days, but she still couldn't believe it had happened. She was nervous.

Sakura scanned the house. It was immaculately clean. Family photos had been removed and replaced with tacky imitations of Van Gough's flowers. The furniture was plain and white. She noticed something missing on the bookshelf.

"Where's Toya's picture?" She asked in quiet anger, already knowing the answer.

Fujitaka sighed. "Sakura, it doesn't comply with the rules of-"

"It's Toya." She whispered. Anger bubbled inside her.

Fujitaka kept his gaze forward facing. "It's just for today. Only for today."

Before she could argue back they heard the sound of cars pulling into their drive. They both shuddered.

"Sakura, please, it's all just for today."

Sakura had no reply she nodded. It's not only for today, because after today, it would be for the rest of her life. She didn't want to fight with him. Not now that they were here. Outside she heard boots hit the pavement, getting closer and closer.

"Sakura." Her father said glancing down at her.

She met his eyes, he had a slight smile in them.

"Happy Birthday."

The corners of her mouth twitched up. She nodded and before she opened her mouth there came three sharp knocks at the door.

She heard her father take a deep breath before willing his feet to move towards the door.

This was it.

Fujitaka took small, careful steps towards the door. Sakura held her breath as he disappeared around the corner. Her ears twitched as she heard the door open. There were muffled voices, small talk and her father's nervous laughter. Then came the loud thud of boots on wood. Every step they took sent a nervous chill up Sakura's spine.

Her father re-emerged into the kitchen. One step behind him was General Li. Sakura's breath caught slightly. She has seen the General many times before, but never so closely. She always got glimpses of him from peeking behind a door, or through the gap in the upstairs banisters. But seeing the General there, five feet away from her, it sent a chill up her spine. He was much, much taller and more intimidating than she has remembered him to be. She could smell the leather off his boots. His light grey uniform was decorated with many badges and was more prestigious than the uniform of the lower ranking military.

The generals shaven face held a tight smile as he finished conversation with Fujitaka. Sakura could see his silver grey hair from under his black and grey military hat. His voice was deep but penetrating through his silver and black moustache. She wasn't listening to their conversation, Sakura just stared at the General with a mix of awe and anger. Then suddenly the General's steely grey eyes met hers.

Sakura's jaw tightened. The last time he looked at her in the eye was seven years ago. That's when Toya went missing, when Sakura's eyes were finally opened to the harsh reality of the Tomoedan regime.

"Ms Kinomoto." The General said slowly, pronouncing every syllable of her name clearly. The General took a small but deliberate step towards her. Sakura kept her spine poker straight. She made sure not to break eye contact. She didn't want him to think for a second that she was weak.

The General kept a smile on his face as he approached her. Sakura did not return the smile.

"My, my…." He said scanning her face. "You've grown into a young lady since the last time we've met. Although, you had more to say last time." He said with a small velvety laugh.

Instead of answering, Sakura sucked in a sharp breath and clenched her jaw. She was just about hanging onto her nerve under the General's misleadingly kind stare.

"Sakura, the General has addressed you." She heard her father whisper with slight panic.

To put her father's nerves at ease, Sakura bowed. She glanced at the General's shoes, which were so shiny she swore she could see her own reflection in them.

Before she stood up straight again the General let out an almighty roar of a laugh.

Sakura's lips parted. Had she missed something.

"My dear," He said with a grin. "A bow is only expected of men. When you address the military or the Monarch, a lady must curtsy. Maybe your father should have started with the basics?" He said looking at Fujitaka with a tight smile.

Fujitaka opened his mouth to summon up a reply.

"Not to worry, not to worry." The General said and walked away from Sakura, whose whole body began to tremble with anger. "That is what we're here for. Now." He said clapping his gloved hands loudly. "We won't worry about such trivial things for now." Then the General's eyes locked on Sakura with a hint of dominance. "You have an interview to do. And if it's been established that you truly are a good citizen on Tomoeda, and are willing to play your part in maintaining Utopia, then we will get the proceedings for your citizenship card under way."

His smile fell into a tight line, his hands clasped together. "Just answer as openly and honestly as you can. We wouldn't want to misplace you." He said with a tight smile. Sakura took it as a challenge.

"Oh I'm sure she will do just fine." Her father said, the nervousness in his voice was obvious. "She belongs here no doubt General Li, where her home is."

The General nodded but didn't take his eyes off Sakura. "We'll see."

"Would you like to do the interview in the living room General?" Her father asked gesturing behind them.

"Whatever the interviewer feels comfortable with." The General replied in a casual tone.

"Oh?" Fujitaka said and fixed his glasses. "You're not doing the interview General?"

Sakura could feel the panic in his voice. For the past few weeks Fujitaka had been couching Sakura on what to say in the interview. The General may seem pleasant, but he has a hard line on what separates the good citizens from the bad. She knew every answer for every question, she knew how to differentiate between trick questions and how to involve every aspect of the new regime into her answers. The thought that someone else, another interviewer with perhaps a different idea of what kept you in eastern Tomoeda could be problematic.

"No, no," The General replies as he made his way into the kitchen, inspecting the pictures on the wall, "I've stopped doing all the interview malarkey a while back. I'm just here to see you my old friend." The General said.

Fujitaka laughed nervously but the panic was still in his eyes.

"You remember my son, don't you Kinomoto-san?" The General said and gestured towards the man standing by the hallway that Sakura up until now, never noticed.

Sakura looked at the man standing at the door. He was staring back at her. He wore the same impeccable uniform as the General, but with less badges. His face was sculpted the same as the General's. He has the General's height and jaw but his eyes were amber, a stark contrast to the greyness of his uniform. He wore a pokerface, giving away no emotion.

"Ah, yes, Syaoran. My God, you've changed a lot since the last time I've seen you. I heard you've been promoted recently."

The man, Syaoran, broke his stare from Sakura to Fujitaka and with a polite bow he answered. "Yes sir, promoted to Lieutenant Colonel last spring sir." To Sakura's surprise, his voice came out softer than she expected.

The corner of Sakura's mouth tugged down slightly in distain.

 _Military bastards_ , she thought.

Sakura concluded that he couldn't be much older than her. Maybe he was less experienced. Sakura felt her shoulders relax, maybe this wouldn't be so bad. But she couldn't shake the frustration of the generals comment off her. Who did he think he was?

 _The General, Sakura, that's who he is. There's a reason his portrait is above every fireplace._

The General and Fujitaka engaged in light conversation about recent bills that were passed at 'The Base'. Sakura glanced up at the young Lieutenant. He was staring back at her with a strange expression. Sakura cocked her head to the side and ran her eyes over his face. Would _he_ be the next general? The heir of this little Utopia?

The Lieutenant shuffled uncomfortably under her stare and averted his eyes to the ground.

 _Yeah,_ she thought. _This should go well._

"Well then." The General clapped his hands again, directing our attention towards him. "You two should get started. Fujitaka, show me these renovations you spoke of."

"Of course, Sakura," Fujitaka extended a hand towards the living room. "Please show Lieutenant Li to the living room."

Sakura pressed her lips into a hard line. Taking one last look at her father she came to a numbing conclusion. If she didn't perform well within the next hour, there was a chance that she would not see her father again. But, if she did what she was told, she could stay in the East and assist in maintaining Utopia.

….She didn't know which was worse.

Everything was prepared perfectly.

Simple, undramatic furniture was feng shui-ed around to look exactly like the display room featured on the front cover of _'_ _Tomoeda Today'._ Magazine. The bookshelf faced west towards 'Base' while Tv's and mirrors reflected towards the North, towards the Monarch. There were two sturdy chairs on either side of the brass table which in Sakura's opinion, was far too out of place. It took the help of two neighbours help lift it from the office upstairs and into the living room.

This just reminded Sakura of how painfully staged this whole thing was.

Sakura walked around the table and slowly turned to face the young Lieutenant. He stood awkwardly at first, his eyes searched the room as if there could be traps. His large, black boot stepped inwards and he gave an awkward lopsided smile.

Sakura's face remained stony, unwavering towards Syaoran's authority. He shuffled nervously before opening his mouth to speak.

"You have a very nice home-"

"There's tea in the pot. Help yourself." Sakura interrupted before opting to sit.

Syaoran looked from the teapot to her before shaking his head. "No, thank you though." He said trying to smile again, but her eyes faced the living room window.

Sakura took a deep breath in as she listened to the Lieutenant shuffle around some papers. She risked a side glance at him. She noticed underneath his grey cap he had strands of chocolate brown hair. He had a sharp nose, his father's nose.

As he placed a pen on the table she took note that his hands were unusually dainty, soft. Not the hands of a man who is involved with military action. After a while her eyes floated back towards the window. She could see the almost naked trees. The crisp leaves that had fallen were probably already swept away, leaving nothing but the perfect clear sidewalk. Winter would descend soon.

"Um…" The Lieutenant grabbed his pen and pulled out a blank piece of paper. To his left were documents written in English. Sakura's English was quite good, but she couldn't make out what they said from her side of the table.

"So the interview is divided into three sections. Section 1, Personal details, Section 2, Aptitude and Section 3, Open Discussion. " He stopped and looked up to make sure she understood.

Sakura gave a slight nod but kept her eyes on the window. At any moment, Mrs Walkins would walk past with her Chihuahua and try to sneak a glance into the Kinomoto household.

"Is that ok, Ms Kinomoto?" He asked again.

"Yes Lieutenant." She said, trying to muster up some sort of smile.

"Li."

"Excuse me?" She said in slight confusion.

The young Lieutenant hesitated for a bit. _What was wrong with him?_ _Not the brightest spark in the military._

"Um…Li. You can call me Lieutenant Li…if you so choose."

Sakura blinked, heavily stuck for something to say, "Ok…..Lieutenant Li."

Syaoran shuffled uncomfortably in his seat. He shuffled some papers around again and cleared his throat.

"Commencing the interview for permeant citizenship of Sakura N. Kinomoto. Date is October 29th 2033, time, 12:30 a.m. Interviewer: Lieutenant Syaoran James Li."

Sakura raised an eyebrow and wondered who he was announcing this to, there wasn't even a voice recorder.

"Section 1, can you please state your full name." Lieutenant Li said, with a bit more control over his voice.

He was met with silence and raised eyebrow from Sakura. "With all due respect Lieutenant…Li. Surely that's something you already know."

The Lieutenant opened his mouth and closed it. Sakura thought she noticed a slight smile play on his face.

"Yes, but I need you to state it. It's just protocol."

Sakura tried hard not to roll her eyes as she stated her name. "Sakura Nathala Kinomoto."

"Nathala…." Syaoran whispered to himself. He furrowed his brow. "Nathala….as in… Nathala B. Omerson, the writer?"

Sakura lowered her chin and peered up at him. She predicted her birth name would stir up some questions. But she was prepared. "No, as in Nathala Smith who joined the first unit of volunteer nurses during the great suffering. I'm a big fan." She said and managed not to vomit through that ridiculous lie.

"Oh…" He said. Sakura sensed a hint of disappointment. Maybe he was annoyed that he couldn't use that to give her a red strike.

"Please state your age and D.O.B."

This time Sakura couldn't help but to roll her eyes. "Surely you already know that? My exact age is the reason we are conducting this interview after all isn't it?"

Syaoran let out a short laugh. "Again, protocol."

"I'm 22. Born October 1st 2011."

"Occupation."

"Recently graduated, currently unemployed."

"What did you major in?"

"Maths and Science."

"Was that always your major? It says here you switched from journalism."

"Well then, I guess you already have the answer to that then Lieutenant Li." She said in a deadpan voice contrasted with a tight smile.

The Lieutenant cleared his throat and studied her face. Sakura sensed he was getting tired of her subtle back talk. His amber eyes were sharply focused on her. The atmosphere changed.

"I changed majors after my first year. I found the journalism course to be…..difficult to make sense of." She drifted off for a second, thinking carefully about how to word her meaning as to not insult Tomoedan media. "I guess I lack the…imagination and words to work in journalism. I switched to Math and Science. It was more logical and straightforward. It makes sense."

Lieutenant Li nodded. Despite the fact she was staring out the window, she could feel his amber eyes on her face.

After a few more frustrating questions, they moved onto section 2.

"How do you think others would describe you, in one word?"

"Thoroughly unlikable." She said with no hint of humour that the Lieutenant was searching for.

"In one word, Ms Kinomoto."

Again, Sakura thought carefully. "Honest."

"What do you think about the ruling of the current government? Do you think the government is doing its part in maintaining a Utopia that caters for all and encourages every citizen to play their part within the great nation of Tomoeda?"

Sakura suppressed a titter. She couldn't help but to notice how the Lieutenant sounded like a tape recording. She wondered how many times he's asked this questioned to uncertified citizens. How many times has he heard the same answers recited back to him? She wondered how he would react if she stated how she really felt?

 _Well, I believe that the government is doing a fine job in the suppressing, enslavement and censoring of its people. I believe that the separation of loved ones into different sanctions, separated by an eighty foot wall is not only barbaric, but serves it's purpose of reminding us all, that we do, in fact live in an overcrowded prison maintained by the regime and dictatorship of General Li, to be succeeded by yourself, Lieutenant Syaoran Li. I believe that I'd rather die in the west with the rest of the god forsaken 'bad' citizens, than to live out the rest of my life in the East, where I can live under fear until I die._

Sakura decided against that. So, she said the speech that her father made hear learn off well over a year ago.

"I believe that our government does an incredible job in the maintenance of our Tomoedan Utopia…"

"That concludes section 2. Of the interview. Ms Kinomoto, if you have any questions to ask. Please feel free to do so."

Sakura felt heavy. There is was. Her faith decided in fifty one minutes and forty two seconds, by a man who may only be three years her senior.

She didn't know the outcome. She wasn't even sure what she wanted the outcome to be. To stay in Tomoeda, or be an outcast in the west. Instead of a weight being lifted from her shoulders, she felt like a rock was sinking into the pit of her stomach. 95% of all those who were born in the East were kept in the East. Only in extreme cases were you relocated. Some who were exceptional human beings were 'invited' to live in the North, those who show to have good physical strength and loyalty towards Tomoeda were invited to join the military, which came with a lot of benefits.

But a majority, the normal everyday people, were allowed to remain here. Here in the perfect, flawless law-abiding East.

Only the outliers were banished to the West. What happens there, She was not quite sure. Sakura read in various magazines that it is a place where people can 'reconnect' with nature, to 'find their way' back to the path of the righteous citizen. Some people even go on retreats there. She heard a rumour once that they don't even have cars there.

"Ms. Kinomoto?"

Sakura snapped out of her thoughts.

"Do you have any questions?" Syaoran asked again.

Sakura glanced out the window again. As if on cue Mrs Walkins and her rat-sized Chihuahua walked by. Like clockwork.

Sakura took a slow breath in.

"What makes people bad?"

Syaoran looked perplexed. There was silence for a while. He too glanced out the window at the seemingly idyllic scene. They sat in silence and watched a leaf danced in the wind before disappearing again.

"Badness stems from frustration. Frustration stems from injustice."

For the first time in the whole interview, Sakura's face softened in disbelief. She looked a Syaoran's side profile, his strong jaw, broad shoulder, his medals. She parted her lips to ask, how could a high ranking Lieutenant come to know one of the lines from blacklisted dissident author Nathala B. Omerson novel?

They both flinched as the beeper went off. Syaoran switched it off and placed it gently back on the table. He looked at her again, perhaps a second too long before speaking softly.

"Well, Ms Kinotmoto, that concludes your citizenship interview. The results should come to you within a few days."

...X...X...X...X...

The General shook Fujitaka's hands as he praised Fujitaka's upkeep of their house. He particularly admired the portraits of the Tomoedan military positioned in key locations throughout the house. Strategically placed, of course.

Sakura's eyes floated back up to the General's son. She was surprised to see that he was staring out the window. His body was in military pose yet she knew his mind was elsewhere.

 _Daydreaming isn't very military like._ She thought.

The Lieutenant caught her stare but he didn't flinch. She couldn't erase his words out of her head. How would he know such a minimal line from Nathala's book?

"We'll be off." The General said and then peered down at Sakura. Her eyes left the Lieutenant and reluctantly brought themselves to the Generals. "As for you, young lady, I hope the Lieutenant wasn't too harsh on you." He said with light humour.

Sakura grinded her teeth. "No, General."

"Very good then. And if your results come out the way we'd hope them to, then maybe you could try out for our administration programme. We'd love to have a young girl such as yourself joining us."

 _Ugh, as if I stood a chance._ Sakura thought bitterly. _And as if I want to the personal assistant or the secretary of some military bastard. Fuck you and your offer._

"Thank you General. That's very kind." She replied with not a hint of gratification on her face.

Although the General nodded, his smile never touched his eyes. His presence seemed to grow more intense and intimidating by the second. She wished he'd just leave already.

After a few more pleasantries, the General and the Lieutenant saluted them. Sakura and Fujitaka did the same. The General was the first to leave. The Lieutenant stood a second longer and gave a half smile. Sakura thought it was almost apologetic for the General's brashness.

Sakura didn't hear or see him walk out, she was already in her own world. As the door shut, Fujitaka collapsed into the chair behind him and released a loud breath.

"Thank God that's over."

Sakura crossed her arms and walked towards the window. She peeled back the curtains with a finger and watched the General's car drive off. Wherever she ended up, she hoped to never have another encounter with the military again.

Sakura's eyes darted towards the street where she caught Mrs Walkins, peeking through her own curtains at Sakura.

...X...X...X...X...


	2. The General's Son

Syaoran sucked in the cool autumn air.

He shuffled the papers in his hands with shaky fingers and scanned the information over and over again. His uniform felt stiffer than usual and his boots were yet to be broken into.

 _Stop fidgeting_. He told himself and scanned around to see if anyone else was watching. The other few soldiers were discussing their plans for their days off and took no notice of him.

"Well someone seems nervous."

Syaoran looked up and saw Meiling with a half smirk on her face. He didn't reply to her and focused his attention back to the papers.

She fell in line with him and glanced at the documents.

"What's got you all worked up? It's not like you haven't done interviews before."

Syaoran sighed. "It's slightly different this time." He mumbled quietly to make sure the other weren't listening.

Meiling took off her cap and smoothed down her silky black hair. She looked so natural in her soldier's uniform. She was one of the only girls to reach such a high ranking. She was certainly not intimidated by being outnumbered by men.

"What's so different? You go in, ask a few questions, they squirm, you 'evaluate' and then you're done. You've done this so many times. To be honest I'm surprised you're _still_ doing it Mr. _Lieutenant Colonel_." She said and playfully nudged him.

He stiffened and looked away towards the tree tops. He still wasn't use to being called Lieutenant Colonel ever since his rather premature and almost _suspicious_ promotion. He would have protested and explained that perhaps he was too young for such a large amount of responsibility but when your father is the General, you don't give any argument for fear of shaming him.

"Yeah well, this one's important…apparently."

"Why? Who is it?"

Before Syaoran could tell her to mind her own business she swiped the documents from his hands.

"Hmmm Kinomoto….Kinomoto…..Why does that name sound familiar?" She pondered and tapped her chin with the page.

Syaoran didn't reply. He watched the big brass doors of the Military Assembly House. Syaoran remembered playing outside them. He used to wait and wait until his father came out of those big threatening doors. Hours would pass by. And here he was still, years later doing the same. With the same feeling of fear that he might screw something up.

"Holy shit!" Meiling said, briefly drawing the attention of the other soldiers. "Is this _the_ Kinomoto's? As in Fujitaka Kinomoto? As in the disgraced journalist? _That's_ who your interviewing?" She said in a much lower voice.

"Yeah….but it's not him. It's his daughter."

"Whoa…no wonder the General is making a personal appearance. Well, someone's definitely getting lucky this week."

"Meiling, please." He said "Don't be so vulgar."

"Oh please it's not like all you guys don't talk about this stuff at Milton's Quey every other weekend." She rolled her eyes. "You know as well as I do how those Eastern girls act. They'll do _anything_ to get recommended to 'Golden Garden' or 'Crystal Hills'. And considering she's _his_ daughter, I'd say she'd do just about anything to escape _that_ reputation. She'll probably introduce herself legs open."

"Will you stop." He said elbowing her. "You know I don't do that."

Unfortunately there was some truth to what she had said. Out of all the people in Tomoeda, Eastern women were without a doubt the _worst_. Not all, of course. But many a time Syaoran was made feel uncomfortable by the less than subtle advances by the young woman.

"I know, I know, 'cause you're such a _gentleman_." She said and playfully winked at him. "Unlike these brutes." She said nodding to the other two soldiers who were mimicking what was most likely their rendezvous with the local women down by Milton's Quay.

"Anyway." She continued. "Considering she comes from _that_ family, I'd say she's trouble. Any sign of uncooperating, you should throw her ass into the West."

Syaoran looked down at her. Meiling was unforgivingly loyal to her occupation to a point that made Syaoran question his. She saw things as black and white, you're good, or you're in the West, that's how it was. She deserved so much more than her rank as Captain.

But she had a point. He didn't know what to expect from a blacklisted, disgraced journalist's daughter. Would today be the first time he'd send someone to the West?

Syaoran snapped his head up when the brass doors finally opened. He gulped but stood poker straight, eyes forward.

The General's boots thudded hard against the tarmac. Syaoran saluted him and fell in line slightly behind him. The General put out his cigar before sliding into the back seat of the car. Syaoran walked around and got in the other side.

Though they were almost the same height, Syaoran still felt small in his father's presence.

The General scanned some papers before finally addressing Syaoran.

"You read the dossier Lieutenant?"

Syaoran cleared his throat and nodded. "Of course, General."

"And I suppose you're wondering why I want you specifically on this interview."

"No, sir," Syaoran lied. "I'm just doing what I'm told sir."

The General nodded and finally looked at him. It was that intense stare that made Syaoran's stomach knot. It meant something serious. It was the same stare he used in the past just before he said things like, _'_ _Syaoran, your mother is extremely ill.'_ Or ' _Syaoran, you're joining the military.'_ Or as recently as _'_ _You're being promoted to Lieutenant Colonel. There is no more discussion about it.'_

Syaoran took a deep breath through his nose and braced himself. Was he being de-promoted already? Was he being relocated?

"This is not just a citizenship interview. This is a containment operation."

Syaoran furrowed his brows. "A containment operation? I don't understand sir. Do you want me to conduct and interview or something different?"

The General leaned back and stroked his silver moustache. "The Kinomoto's are a special family. You understand that, don't you?"

Syaoran nodded. "Yes sir. But surely they're not a danger to Tomoeda anymore?"

"No. But you can never be sure with their type." The General leaned forward. "I want you to watch her."

Syaoran blinked. "Watch her, sir? You mean after the interview."

"Yes. Depending on her results."

Syaoran waited to see if he would give more information about his motives or reasoning. But the General said no more.

"General," Syaoran said in a low voice so that not even the driver could hear. "Do you want me to…. alter her results?" Syaoran prayed that was not what he was asking for. Corruption in citizenship has been happening since it's conception. It wasn't unusual to hear of an unfair relocation, but Syaoran never personally did it, nor did he want to.

The General said nothing for a few moments. Syaoran shifted under the tense atmosphere. "No. No, that would cause more problems. But, if you sense trouble from here. Relocation would be best."

"Why would that cause problems sir?"

The General already refocused his attention to the newspaper by his side. He snapped it open and began reading _'_ _Tomoeda Today'_ , signalling an end to their discussion.

Syaoran's nerves began to slightly increase under this new-found pressure.

It took two hours by highway to even reach the East. When they arrived, Syaoran felt as if he'd been thrown into a different world. It had been years since he visited the East. He'd forgotten how…staged…it looked.

As they passed through the Eastern wall Syaoran caught sight of the East slogan.

 _'_ _Cooperation towards maintaining Utopia'_

Syaoran cringed.

As he peered out the window he saw rows and rows of suburban houses all nicely lined up. Each house had a perfectly square garden complete with identical Tomoedan made cars. Since his last visit, Easterners were allowed choose their cars in a variety of colours, but they had to be the same make. The streets were perfectly clean. Syaoran couldn't help but wonder what would happened if an autumn leaf dared to fall onto the perfect pavement.

He shuddered. The whole place was so… Stepford-wivey. No wonder the Military received so many transferral requests a year. As they drove further in everywhere became more urbanized with more public facilities coming into view. Syaoran squinted into the distance and could start making out the wall that separated the North-East wall.

They slowed down and took a right turn. This estate was more normal, less suburbany than other houses. Syaoran began to think about the Kinomoto daughter. What would she be like? Would she throw herself at him like other have done in the past? Or would he be met with the quintessential ''I'm a good girl please don't relocate me'?

The car came to a sudden halt. Syaoran stepped out and looked at the house. It was quaint, not too showy, not out of the ordinary. The General's guard knocked on the door three times and returned to the car to wait.

The General and Syaoran waited. His father stood with his arms resting behind his back, his face expressionless. They heard the door unlock.

Fujitaka Kinomoto answered the door. The General's face broke into a welcoming smile as he shook Fujitaka's hand as if they were old buddies, something that Syaoran knew was far from the truth.

Syaoran had met Fujitaka once, perhaps fifteen years ago, but he did not remember him. Syaoran was surprised to see Fujitaka look so….normal, and friendly.

Syaoran had imagined Fujitaka as a bitter old man, perhaps with a permanent frown caused by his career being disgraced, maybe long fingernails and a hunch back. But Fujitaka was actually so normal, polite. Syaoran simply couldn't imagine him as the blacklisted 'anti-government' and violent criminal that he was led to believe he is.

Once inside the house, Syaoran felt like a giant. He was used to freely roaming the huge mansions that resided at the Military base. It was strange for him to walk within an eastern house with its narrow halls.

They took a left turn into the kitchen. The kitchen was warm. Syaoran found that it was a different warm to the one in his own house, which always felt like it was in a state of permanent coldness.

Then his eyes landed on her.

Syaoran blinked, then blinked again.

She stood so perfectly still that one would think she was an extravagant piece of furniture. Syaoran stopped in his tracks just before crossing into the kitchen. She wore a light blue dress which was perfectly simple. It hugged loosely around her small boyish frame. Her skin was a very light shade of olive. She had high cheekbones and a small but sharp nose. Syaoran's eyes fell on her top lip, which was noticeably plumper than her bottom one. On top of this was a mop of silky light brown hair loosely pinned up.

She looked like a dream.

Syaoran took an uneasy breath in. He was met with a strange sensation.

Suddenly, her eyes flashed towards the General. Syaoran could see the intense green that shone from them. Syaoran watched her face, which gave away no expression. Her eyes remained intently fixated on the General. Syaoran wondered why she was so intense with her stare. She seemed….angry.

"Ms Kinomoto." The General said, finally addressing her.

Syaoran expected her to break into a warm smile. After all, she was being addressed to by the General. People from every part of Tomoeda sucked up to the General in hopes of winning his approval. Eastern girls were certainly no exception.

Syaoran was completely taken aback when the young Kinomoto girl did not return his smile. Her face remained almost deadpan, expressionless.

"My, my….You've grown into a young lady since the last time we've met. Although, you had more to say last time." He said with a small velvety laugh.

Again, Syaoran expected her to titter and blush at the General's compliment. So many people would kill to have the General address them so personally. But her face didn't change, didn't smile. This was heading south in just a few short minutes. Syaoran felt his palms getting sweaty.

"Sakura, the General has addressed you." Her father ushered.

Then she did something no young lady should do in from of the General of the Tomoedan military, she _bowed._

Has Syaoran not remembered where he was he would have reached up and tore out his hair. _No, no, no ,no don't BOW!_

The General laughed and chastised her on the basic principles of formalities.

Instead of laughing it off nervously or apologizing like she should have, Syaoran saw her jaw tighten. There were tense vibes radiating out from her.

Despite her angel-like appearance, there was something else lurking inside her small body. Syaoran's father dismissed this fumble, but knew he already was formulating a long-lasting opinion of her.

"We won't worry about such trivial things for now. You have an interview to do. And if it's been established that you truly are a good citizen on Tomoeda, and are willing to play your part in maintaining Utopia, then we will get the proceedings for your citizenship card under way. Just answer as openly and honestly as you can. We wouldn't want to misplace you." The General said.

The General and Fujitaka spoke of somethings but Syaoran was being engulfed into another world.

She seemed…angry, or maybe annoyed? Citizenship tests are stressful, from what Syaoran heard. But he watched her with semi-fascination. He had never seen anyone ever address the General, his father, with anything but utter respect and cowardice. But this girl, Sakura Kinomoto, was different.

His brain tried to come to terms with her natural beauty in contrast to her attitude.

As he stared at her, he wondered what she looked like when she smiled. Would her eyes lighten up, would the skin around the corners of her mouth crinkle with laughter lines?

"Oh?" Fujitaka said and fixed his glasses. "You're not doing the interview General?"

"No, no, I've stopped doing all the interview malarkey a while back. I'm just here to see you my old friend." The General said. "You remember my son, don't you Kinomoto-san?" The General said gesturing towards Syaoran.

Syaoran snapped out of his daydream.

"Ah, yes, Syaoran. My God, you've changed a lot since the last time I've seen you. I heard you've been promoted recently."

"Yes sir, promoted to First Lieutenant last spring sir."

Syaoran answered a few more questions, but he could feel _her_ eyes on him. Syaoran kept his eyes on Fujitaka as he answered his questions, but he could feel her eyes burning like a green fire into his face.

"Please show Lieutenant Li into the living room." Fujitaka said.

The girl had barely spoken a word, Syaoran couldn't imagine conducting an hour long interview with her. He got slightly nervous at the thoughts of being alone with her. And then he stared to worry about her results. The General warned him, if she strayed from what the qualities of an Easterner, there was no hope for her, not with her families track record.

Sakura just nodded and floated towards Syaoran. He thought their eyes would meet again but instead she fluttered past him, eyes looking past him.

He caught her scent, something floral, but subtle. He was sure he wouldn't forget it.

They emerged into the living room. She sat opposite to him, facing slightly towards the window. Syaoran settled himself in the chair across from her. The living room was exceptionally homely. The bookcase was bursting with all kinds of literature and manuscripts. One thing bothered Syaoran. As he glanced up he couldn't not notice the General's portrait hanging above the fireplace. It wasn't unusual for homes to feature this; the General's portrait was always included. But it just looked so out of place, intrusive even.

Syaoran tried to break the silence.

"You have a very nice home-"

"There's tea in the pot. Help yourself." Sakura interrupted before opting to sit.

Syaoran didn't know how to react. It was _impolite_ to not immediately pour tea for a soldier. Though it was not necessarily a rule, it was still common knowledge. Not a great start for her.

"No, thank you though."

Syaoran tried to offer a smile but she continued to look out the window. Up close, Syaoran caught more details in her face. He could see the tiny freckles which dotted her nose. Her eyes were an almond shape which held her dazzling green eyes.

Syaoran thought she looked like one of those models featured in _'_ _Tomoeda Today'_ Homestyle magazines. Not the supermodelly types, more like the girl who just baked a pie, or knitted a scarf. One of those 'ideal' Tomoedan wives.

But with a face as stony as hers, Syaoran didn't think she would appreciate something like that.

Syaoran cleared his throat as he explained the procedure of the interview to her. She gave a slight nod, but kept her eyes downcast

"Yes Lieutenant." She said with a tight smile that didn't reach her eyes.

Syaoran didn't expect the next word to fall out of his mouth. "Li."

"Excuse me?" She said in slight confusion.

He shifted uncomfortably, not really knowing why he said it either. He just hated being called Lieutenant. He also thought it would be a way to break the icy barrier between them.

Syaoran commenced the interview. _Ok, no more going easy. This is serious._ He told himself. _Interview her just like you have everyone else._

"Section 1, can you please state your full name."

He was met with silence. When he looked up she had a raised eyebrow. Syaoran looked down at his paper to make sure he asked the right question.

"With all due respect, Lieutenant…Li. Surely that's something you already know."

Syaoran's chest tightened. No one has ever said anything like that during an interview before. That _should_ be a yellow strike.

There were three types of penalties in every interview. Green ones were slip ups, mistakes, not remembering the Tomoedan oath exactly word-for-word. They were fine and never resulted in relocation, just a re-education seminar if you received more than eight green strikes. Yellow strikes were given when the interviewee showed disrespect, impoliteness lack of cooperation, argument, and criticism. They were more serious, more than four would cause for another interview, in the Military base. An _interrogation-like_ interview with the possibly result of hard labour. Then there were red strikes, you only needed one, and you were relocated.

Syaoran only ever witnessed one red strike given in an interview. A twenty-four year old man told a sergeant during his interview; 'You and the whole military can go fuck yourselves with a rusty knife.'

That man was relocated within six hours.

Sakura had one yellow strike.

"Yes, but I need you to state it. It's just protocol."

She stated her full name which made Syaoran worry for her. Sakura was a name that died out very shortly after the Takeover. The Sakura tree was the symbol of the rebels. Nathala was the name of a famous dissident writer. That was either bad luck or a brilliant 'go fuck yourself' name.

 _Sakura…Nathala….Kinomoto…._ He liked that name.

When he pressed her about her birth name told him of some other Nathala which had something to do with the army.

 _Lie_. He thought.

"Please state your age and D.O.B."

She rolled her eyes.

Another yellow strike.

"Surely you already know that? My exact age is the reason we are conducting this interview after all isn't it?"

Syaoran laughed involuntarily. "Again, protocol."

"I'm 22. Born October 1st 2011."

"Occupation."

"Recently graduated, currently unemployed."

"What did you major in?"

"Maths and Science." Syaoran paused for a second, he couldn't imagine her in a lab coat or doing something so tediously mathematical.

"Was that always your major? It says here you switched from journalism."

"Well then, I guess you already have the answer to that then Lieutenant Li." She said with a dead stare.

Strike three. Three yellows.

How can this happen? It had only been seven minutes since they had entered the room, how could she be so close to screwing this up? Syaoran scribbled down notes so he could remember what to write later. It occurred to him that she might to trying to perform badly. But why would she? Nobody, _nobody_ would want to be thrown into the West. She needed to start taking this more seriously. She was starting to lose her charm.

She straightened up slightly, sensing a shift in the atmosphere.

As she spoke, Syaoran picked up on her slight accent. Her English was impeccable, better than everyone else he'd interviewed in the East, but she still carried a slight accent. Her R's and C's were softer, featherier than people in the North and South. From her profile, she only started to study English within the last four years, a late starter, but she was very impressive. Her mother tongue was ' _Brethayne',_ which was the language spoken pre-takeover, when East Tomoeda was called ' _Mahr Brethan'_ (Poet's Gate) _._ Syaoran didn't know much about former _Mahr Brethan_ , only that they were forced to learn English in schools after the takeover.

They struggled through the rest of the interviews. Syaoran giving her a few green strikes, but letting her slide on certain things. Every time she'd slip up, or not act how an East Tomoedan _should_ act, he knew she should have been penalized, but he didn't do it. She was on the edge of relocation or re-education but…. he never gave her that final mark. The way she held herself, the way she spoke, he never heard anyone so…. different before. He was use to interviewees being a carbon copy of each other. Same answers, same responses, same _'_ _oh I just LOVE living in Tomoeda. I feel so fortunate to be a part of our great nation. There is nowhere else in the world where Utopia is found but right here.'_

She had a face like a sort of….doll. But he knew she had the ability to cut him down, if she chose. The way she looked at his father, the willingness _not_ to be intimidated into being the righteous citizen…maybe that's what he admired. Maybe…or maybe he had briefly become infatuated with this out of place citizen.

They came towards the end of the interview and Syaoran was paralyzed with indecision. Based on her performance, it was obvious. She didn't _belong_ in the East. She didn't live up to the expectation of an Easterner, nor did she try. He struggled back and forth, between duty and gut feeling. He looked up at her petite frame and struggled to imagine her suffering through hard labour in the West. But Syaoran felt the weight of his father's expectation on his shoulders.

It should have been an easy decision, but he couldn't shake the image of how she was un-intimidated by his father. The way she did not swoon for Syaoran's approval from the first second.

She was an enigma, and that made her dangerous. A possible danger to the East, to Tomoeda, to Utopia. Then again, perhaps not. Perhaps she had no interest in anti-governmental activities, perhaps she just makes bad first impressions.

They were towards the end of the interview and by then, Syaoran's mind had drifted off as Sakura rattled off the pre-learned speech about how great it was to live in Tomoeda. He could tell that even she was struggling got listed to herself. Syaoran's eyes wandered over to the bookshelf. His eyes ran across the titles of Eastern literature, post-takeover, of course. He thought about a Nathala B. Omerson book he had read in the forbidden section of the Military Base Library. It was one of those days where his father was submerged into one of those meetings that went on for hours. He'd snuck into the library and read the first book he plucked out.

"Do you have any questions?" Syaoran asked again.

She was still staring out the window, caught up in her own thought. Then she asked a peculiar question.

"What makes people bad?"

Syaoran furrowed his brows. He knew there was a deeper meaning to that question, but he was not armed with the right response.

"Badness stems from frustration. Frustration stems from injustice." He had no idea why he said that. It just came out. It was a minimal line he read from somewhere ages ago. It always stuck in his head, but now of all times, it shouldn't have come out. He squeezed his eyes shut and mentally kicked himself. _I should not have said that. Why did I say that?_

Before she could say anymore, the timer went off.

"Well, Ms Kinotmoto, that concludes your citizenship interview. The results should come to you within a few days."

She looked back with him in the way that a lot of interviewees did when the interview concluded. Worry, anxiety, and the fear of what happens next. For the first time since he stepped into the Kinomoto house, he saw a flicker of emotion in her green eyes.

She worried about her fate. Syaoran worried too….because he didn't know either.

...X...X...X...X...

As they drove farther away from the East, Syaoran replayed the interview over and over again. Her answers became harder and harder to recall, he found himself trying to sharpen the image of her face.

The tiniest of smiles crept across his face.

There was no doubt, he was completely and utterly smitten with Ms Sakura Kinomoto.

...X...X...X...X...

Sakura was stirring tea. Watching the colour slowly change.

Fujitaka emerged into the kitchen with the dreaded envelope in hand. Sakura sucked in a sharp breath and he came closer. His hands shook very subtly. They both hadn't slept well in the past three days.

Sakura took it, it was so light. She pushed her fringe out of her eyes and began to open it. Her father touched her hand lightly.

"Whatever happens, I love you. We'll get through anything."

Sakura nodded but said nothing. She ran her thumbs over the stamp which read,

'SAKURA N. KINOMOTO.

PRIVATE INFORMATION'

She opened it and scanned the first few lines. She was filled with a strange sensation.

Her father scanned her expressionless face. "Well?" He said, trying to keep under control.

She gave him the envelope. He read the first few lines and almost collapsed.

"Oh thank God." He said and rubbed his cheeks to bring back the colour into them. "Thank God."

Sakura didn't know how to react. She re-read the results.

' _Dear Ms Sakura N. Kinomoto,_

 _Upon you recent citizenship interview, we are delighted to inform you that you have been allocated to East Tomoeda. Your pass will be delivered to you within the next few days….._

Although she should breathe a sigh of relief upon her results, she treated them with suspicion. This is what she wanted….right? She wanted to stay in the East, the predictable, never-changing East. Her thoughts flew to the young Lieutenant Coloanal Syaoran Li.


	3. Purpose

**Enjoy!**

X X X

Sakura tried not to get agitated.

The _tap, tap, tapping_ of fingers over the keyboard was non-stop the past twenty minutes. Sakura kept her breathing steady and tried not to draw attention to her frustration.

Her eyes floated up to the yellow and blue logo above the row of desks that read 'Job Centre'.

The old lady behind the glass window said nothing but released an annoyed sigh every five minutes. Sakura bit the inside of her cheek and tapped her foot impatiently.

The old lady stopped typing, her hand hovered above the keyboard, and then started to type furiously away again.

Sakura lobbed her head to the side to observe the other young people looking for employment. Some were around her age, some slightly older.

The old lady stopped typing, dropped her hands to her side and said. 'Mothing.'

"What?" Sakura said, a little louder than she meant to.

Some people turned their heads to look at her. Sakura leaned into the window and said in a hushed voice, "What do you mean, 'nothing'?"

"I mean," She replied, removing her large glasses. "There are no jobs or internships that match with your criteria. I mean, are you surprised? You won't work with people your own age, children, elderly people. You don't want to teach or work in any field related to you field of study. _And_ you won't relocate to another area in Tomoeda. What were you expecting."

Sakura opened her mouth to reply but couldn't muster up a reply.

"You need to adjust your expectations if you think you're ever going to get work. And you know what happens if you stay unemployed for too long in Tomoeda." She said raising her eyebrow.

"Why can't I just stay in the research lab? That job was perfect for me."

"That was a job for minors and students. You know well that once you reach twenty-two years of age that that type of work is not acceptable. You're legally an adult now so if I were you, I would start thinking about expanding your work conditions."

She was getting fed up with Sakura. As much as Sakura would have loved to get up and leave, she couldn't go home and tell her father that she failed to land a job _again_ after two months of looking. No, today she simple _had_ to find a job.

"Would you consider relocating?" She asked.

Sakura shook her head. She didn't want to leave her father all alone in the house. She knew that would kill him, despite the fact he'd insist.

"What about community based work?" The lady asked.

"Fine. But nothing that involves too much socializing."

The lady began searching again. Another agonizing five minutes later she gave a lopsided smile and nodded to herself.

"Happy Books Library are looking for an assistant for administrative duties. The work is three days a week with minimum pay. Only a twenty minute walk from your house. The job has been on the market for a year. It's run by Alma Tsukishiro, surly you've heard of her." She snickered.

Sakura cringed. _Happy Books,_ who thinks of these names? Sakura read over the job description. It would do, for now. She then bit her lip to stop from groaning. Tsukishiro….she wondered if she'd have to encounter _him._

"Of course the working hours don't add up to East Tomoeda criteria so you'll have to find some volunteer work to fill in the other two days."

Sakura blew hot air out of her cheeks. A job is a job.

X

Mrs Tsukishiro, the owner of _Happy Books Library_ was old, even older than the woman at the job centre. She only reached four foot and had a voice so meek she sounded as if she were stuck in a well. Sakura spent a frustrating fifteen minutes explaining that she was the new assistant.

Sakura was put to work in the back room and her jaw nearly fell to the floor with what she seen. Dusty old books, hundreds of them were piled up high, disorganized, loose pages, titles missing. How on earth was she to ever organize them? She groaned at the task ahead of her, yet was thankful about the silence within the job.

There were only three people employed at _Happy Books_. Mrs Tsukishiro, Sakura, and a forty-something year old man who tampered with the only computer in the store. _Happy Books_ was located in a less populous area of East Tomoeda. Most of the residents here for over sixty and didn't see any need to come to a rundown old bookstore whose main inventory was on agriculture techniques and outdated records.

After a few weeks working at the bookstore, Sakura fell into a routine.

As she was stocking books into their rightful places she heard a voice coming from behind her. "Well hello there."

Sakura flinched and saw Rika, her childhood friend peering around the door. She pushed her short ruby hair from her eyes and peered down at Sakura.

"What are you doing here?" Sakura asked while returning her attention back to her books.

Rika slinked around the bookshelf. "I've been trying to get you for so long now! Will you just buy a phone already?" She whined and stared at Sakura with her brown eyes.

"No. How did you find me?"

"Well when I started to freak out that you actually were relocated to the west or something, I called around to your place. You can imagine the surprise on my face when your dad said you were working here! Why didn't you call me?" She placed her hand on her hips and raised an eyebrow at Sakura, daring her to make an excuse.

Sakura shrugged and lowered a stack of books beside her. "I didn't consider it."

Rika was use to Sakura's bluntness, yet somehow, they remained friends throughout all the years. Sakura didn't understand why she stuck by her, they didn't even have that much in common.

"Well, I was really worried they relocated you. And why the hell are you working here? This place is so dull." Rika casted her eye around the tiny one floor bookstore. She flared her nostril at the smell of the dying wallpaper hanging from the corners of the walls.

Sakura didn't reply as she scanned through some of the titles on the shelf.

"Fine, don't share with me. But I think I know what attracted you this dump." She said playfully and side glanced at Sakura.

Sakura's jaw clenched. "This was the only job that was compatible with me for now. There's no other reason why I'm here."

"Fine." Rika shrugged but kept that annoying grin on her face. "So….have you _seen_ Yukito lately."

"Shut up Rika."

"Don't be so hostile." She said playfully and leaned in to whisper. "He's _always_ asking about you. Just think of how thrilled he'd be if he knew you were working at his grandma's bookstore. He'll think it's you giving him a sign." Rika winked, getting some enjoyment out of this.

"He can think whatever the hell he wants. I'm just here to do a job."

"Oh Sakura _come on!_ You guys were _engaged_! He's still so hung up on you. And the way you just ditched him like that…."

"First of all," Sakura whispered sharply and pushed a book angrily into its place.. "Yukito and I were _not_ engaged. He proposed and I said no. Second, we'd have to actually have be together for me to have _ditched_ him."

"Well, rumour has it that you said you'd think about it. People are saying you've been thinking about it a long time."

"Rika, look at me. Do I look like the type to have said something like that? You know that Yukito and I were a fling. It's not my fault he doesn't take rejection well."

Rika sighed. She knew it was all rumours. Sakura wasn't exactly a romantic. She looked at her friend stacking books with a concentrated face. Would this be her life? Stewing away in this bookstore with all this pent-up anger and frustration until she became Mrs Tsukishiro?

"Sakura…you're twenty-two. You know that's a big deal in Tomoeda. I'm not saying you _need_ a man, or even want one. It's just that a guy like Yukito...he's so well respected in the community. If you guys got married…"

"Rika." Sakura said, getting annoyed. "I'm not ashamed of who I am. I don't need to marry a _well respected man_ to abolish the _shame_ that you think I have."

"You know that's not what I'm saying Sakura. I'm just saying, it would certainly make your life a lot easier. You don't socialize that much and…If you stay by yourself for too long, people might start to think…." Rika stopped herself. Sakura's piercing emerald eyes dared her to finish.

Rika surrendered. "He's not going to wait for you forever. Girls are clawing their way to try and get them to notice him. Just think about it."

"Do you want me to thank you?"

Rika cracked a smile. "It's not like you ever would."

Sakura smirked.

"Anyway there's another reason I'm here. So my brother's wife heard from her hairdresser who heard from Jenny Powler who heard from Ms Walkins that your interviewer was none other than the General's son himself!" Rika nearly squealed as she got to the end of that long statement.

Sakura rolled her eyes. "And, was there a question there?"

Rika's mouth dropped. "OH MY GOD it's true isn't it? Lieutenant Colonel Syaoran Li interviewed you. That's unbelievable? I didn't even know he did that stuff. I would DIE if he was even near me! What was he like? Was he scary? Was he charming? 'Cause Jenny Powler's cousin met him briefly and she said that-"

"Rika, as much as I would love to keep on this conversation, I've to work."

"Seriously? You're not going to give me anything? Sakura, I'm a bored old nurse. Nothing exciting ever has happened since I bought a new couch last year. Give an old friend something to fantasise about while she's emptying bed pans on a twenty hour shift."

"Goodbye Rika."

Rika scoffed, then a serious look came across her face. "Kidding aside Sakura, just be careful."

"What do you mean?"

"Last week at _The Shandy_ , Naoko had a rather uncomfortable encounter with a soldier. If you know what I mean."

Sakura frowned. Yes, the shady side of the soldiers. It was not uncommon to hear about harassment from the soldiers towards young women. Sometimes it was just remarks, a bit too touchy feely, enough to make any women wary. Sexual assault sometimes happened. Not in the South or North of course, only in the East where bored soldiers seen fit to target someone after a few drinks. It went both ways sometimes. As soldier may promise a young girl or boy a transfer to the North in return for certain _favours_. Surprise, surprise, they rarely keep their word.

"I'll be fine Rika. I don't think Lieutenant Li is interested in targeting a young girl from the East. I think it's more because of my family name."

Rika nodded. "As long as you're careful. I do worry about you Sakura."

Sakura nodded.

"Anyways, at least come get a drink with me this weekend, ok? I can tell you all about my work at the E-Tomoeda administration programme."

"If you gave me a year I couldn't list all the things I'd rather do."

"I'll see you there." She said and nudged Sakura with her elbow.

X x x

After a month of working at the library, Sakura was completely resigned to boredom. The books were arranged, everything was filed and she served the same four customers a week. Mrs Tsukishiro was notably absent most of the time, opting to spend her time locked up in her office napping.

Yukito never called by, she was grateful for that. Sakura didn't know how she would handle speaking to her fake ex-fiancée. Sakura remembered how he looked the day he got down on one knee at Penguin Park with too much optimism in his eyes. She also remembered the look of devastation when she uttered that syllable with no expression in her voice. _"_ _No."_

Then the rumours started. The rumours of how Sakura Kinomoto, the pokerfaced ice-queen of south-east Tomeda had toyed with the young pharmacists heart strings for over a year, only to nastily deliver the crushing blow of rejection. This all came at some shock to Sakura, she never even considered Yukito as her boyfriend. But he kept coming for her with hopeless optimism.

She'd known Yukito since she was ten years old. He was a very good friend of Toya's. A small smile crept on Sakura's lips. She hadn't thought of Toya in a while, and not in such a happy way. She glanced at the calendar. Next week would be five years since he…

She shook her head. She didn't want to go there, not to those thoughts. They were still too painful.

The library was poorly lit up by a few energy saving lights. It was six-thirty p.m. and she had only an hour left until closing time.

She was distracted when the door creaked open slowly. Sakura glanced up and furrowed her brow. The man who came in wore a long grey trench coat and a peaked cap. He looked above his high collar and Sakura gave a small nod to acknowledge him. There were a few locals at 'Happy Library', he was not one of them. He turned left and slowly disappeared into a row of books. Sakura returned her attention to the inventory book. Not so long later, when sun had completely set, she looked up to find the man standing above her.

Sakura took a sharp breath in from shock.

"Excuse me." He said in a surprisingly boyish voice. His eyes shifted from left to right as he shuffled from one foot to the other. He had long shaggy blonde hair tucked behind his ears. Some dark stubble was dotted around his face and his posture was slumped.

"Yes?" Sakura answered hesitantly.

Sakura was aware that she was alone and cornered. Her heartbeat quickened and she gulped. She clutched the book tighter in her hand and wondered if she was strong enough to club him with it.

"Is eh…..Is Mrs Tsukishiro here? I need to give her something."

Sakura shook her head. "No, she left an hour ago, but I can give her a message if you want." Sakura cursed herself, she should have said yes. Now he knows that she is alone.

The man looked around again and hesitated. Sakura noticed him clutching a small grey rucksack in his hand. He glanced at his watch and at the door. Sakura stood up slowly, wondering if she should make a bolt for the door.

"It's just that….I ….I need to give her this." He said holding up the bag.

"Oh, you can come back tomorrow, she'll be here from eight-thirty-"

"No, no that won't be possible, I need her to take this…tonight. Where does she live?"

"I don't know." Sakura answered honestly. "Do you want to call her?"

"No, no, don't use a phone."

Sakura didn't know how to react to his shifty-ness.

"You can leave it in the back room if you want? She can pick it up tomorrow."

He became even shiftier. His eyes shifted from his watch to the door and he started to bounce with nervousness. He looked Sakura in the eye. He had dark rings under his red-rimmed eyes, like he hadn't slept for weeks.

After another minute of contemplating he said, "OK."

He stepped pass her and disappeared into the back room. Sakura shuddered at the strangeness of the encounter and re-focused her attention. The man was in there over fifteen minutes and when he re-emerged he pulled down his cap, mumbled a thanks and shoved his hands deep into his pockets.

As he headed towards the door he suddenly froze mid-step. Sakura squinted and just as she was about to ask if everything was ok, she heard it.

It was distant at first, then it swelled into a loud blaring police siren. Before Sakura even looked up she seen the flashing red and blue of the police car pull up.

"What the-"

Before Sakura could finish her sentence the man turned around in lightening speed and came towards her. Sakura didn't have enough time to react before he grabbed her elbow and shoved her backwards.

"Get into the room!" He roared with panic.

Sakura lost her footing and she stumbled backwards in his grip. Her voice got caught in her throat as she was shoved in to the freezing back room.

"What's happening? Why are the police here?" She asked.

"Is there another exit?" He asked in panic, ignoring her frantic questions.

Sakura shook her head. "The front door is the only way out."

"Shit! Shit, shit shit!" He cursed and paced around grabbing his hair. His cap knocked off and Sakura got a look at his face. He looked young, and for some reason Sakura thought he was familiar, but she couldn't figure out why.

He shoved his cap back on and paced again, mumbling to himself. Sakura tried to edge her way to the door. His head snapped up, a maddening look in his eyes.

He lunged at her and pulled a knife out to her throat. A scream got caught in her throat. She swallowed and decided it was better to remain calm. He was already freaked out.

"We've come too far to be stopped now. It won't end here." He spluttered.

"What are you talking about?" Sakura asked as calmly as possible, trying to block out the feeling of the rusty knife against her throat.

"I know who you are, Sakura." He said in a low voice. "And that's why I'm not going to hurt you so please, just go with this. I won't hurt you unless you do something to make me hurt you."

"Who are you?" Sakura whispered.

"I'm sorry," He said and glance through that small window. Red and blue lights flashed against his face. Sakura couldn't understand how she knew him, but there was so much familiarity in his face. "I never thought that you would be here. Believe me I don't want you of all people to be a part of this."

"Apart of what?" She said flicking her eyes from his face to the knife.

He turned Sakura around and pushed her through the door.

She struggled a little which only made his grip her harder. "Please don't make me hurt. Please, he'll kill me if I did anything to you."

Sakura was about to ask who _he_ was but was taken aback when she glanced out the glass door. Amongst the flashing police cars were maybe twenty armed men, aiming their guns towards Sakura and her attacker. She became alert to the man's trembling hand. The knife shuddered against her neck.

Sakura's heart pulsed to loud in her ears she could barely make out what was being said over the megaphone.

"Open the door." He said into her ear.

Sakura reached forward and pushed the glass door open. The cold air made her shudder, as did all the guns pointed towards them.

"Let the hostage go." One man said into his megaphone.

Sakura squinted and saw that they were no ordinary police, they were police specifically from both the East and south side of Tomeda. Why were part of the military here?

"Put down your guns!" The man screamed and waved the knife in the air. "I'll kill her! I mean it! I'll slice open her throat!"

"Please, be calm. We just need to speak with you."

Sakura almost laughed. As if that was _all_ they wanted.

"I'll kill her! Don't think I won't."

They were at a stand off. Sakura didn't know who would back down first.

"They can't stop the resistance. We'll take down the walls, brick by fucking brick." He hissed. Sakura knew he was talking to himself and not to her but it sent a chill down her spine.

Not because of the threateningness in his voice, but because it was eerily echoed something Toya said in his final days before-

"Let the girl go. She is not a part of this." The man said once again. Neither of them had lowered their guns. "Please let her go and come with us. Don't make us shoot you."

Sakura was breathing so sharply that she began to feel dizzy. Her legs were threatening to give way.

"You can't stop the rebellion!" He roared. "You can stop me, but you can't stop the rebellion!" He pushed Sakura to the ground bolted to the right. He didn't even make it three yards before six bullets caught his back, and one in his head.

By the time Sakura looked up, blood already began to pool around his still body.

"Damn it!" Said the man with the megaphone. "I said _don't kill!_ We needed him!" He threw the megaphone onto the concrete and continued to curse.

Sakura's attackers cap had fallen off again and Sakura's eyes fell to his face once more. She gasped loudly as she suddenly realized who he was.

Kero Jones, her dead brother's old best friend. The same best friend who was supposedly shot dead that same night as Toya was.

X X X

Sakura sat in silence inside the ambulance.

She clutched the empty cup of water and tried but failed to blink out the image of Kero's dead body. Kero Jones was alive. He was presumed dead five years ago along with her brother and five others. Their bodies were never recovered, the police said the river must have swallowed them up and spat them out into the sea. But no one could have survived the that river. There was no way any of them could have survived. No way.

But Kero was here, tonight. Sakura remembered the last time she saw him. He was Toya's gap-toothed loyal companion with a smile that never faded. A little pudgy in an adorable way. He use to follow Toya everywhere. How did he end up the way he did? A million thoughts shot across her mind. Did he recognize her? Did Toya also make it? What the hell was he doing here? Who was he so afraid of? _What_ was he so afraid of?

At some point someone threw a blanket around her shoulders but she was still in shock to take notice. A paramedic asked her a few questions and shone a light across her eyes.

"Everything seems to be fine, just wait here a while until the shock passes. Is there anyone you'd like to call to pick you up?" the paramedic asked.

Sakura thought of her father, how worried he'd be to receive a call from a stranger telling him what had happened. She decided she'd tell him herself later.

"No, I'm fine."

The paramedic nodded and left. Sakura squeezed her temples and sighed. Her legs were shaky as she stepped outside the ambulance, but she needed fresh air.

In the distance, she heard someone calling her name. Her head snapped up at the familiar voice.

"Sakura!" She heard again.

Sakura groaned when she saw his face appear from the gathering crowd.

"Fuck." She whispered. "Anyone but him."

He stumbled as he made his was under the police tape. A police officer stopped him but let him by after a few words. His slick hair didn't move as he ran towards her.

Sakura turned her head away slightly, praying by some miracle he didn't see her. But she heard him huffing towards her. He stopped a foot before her to catch his breath. When she looked up his cheeks had already began filling up with pinks and reds. He pushed his glasses back up the bridge of his nose and placed a hand over his heart.

"Oh Sakura, thank God. Thank _God_ you're ok. I came as soon as I heard." He grabbed her hand in his freshly manicured one. "You poor thing, such an awful thing to happen here of all places! Are you OK? Are you hurt? Do you need me to carry you?"

Sakura slipped her hand out of his and tried to hide her annoyance.

"Yukito, I'm fine. You don't need to be here."

"Are you serious? Of course I need to be here! You were attacked."

"He didn't hurt me."

"You don't have to be so tough around me Sakura, you know that." He made a second attempt to take her hand but she slipped it under the blanket before he could reach it.

"Yukito, I'd rather not make a big deal out of this. Please, just go home."

Yukito shushed her softly and put his arm around her. With everything that happened tonight, he was the last thing she needed.

She shifted away from him pushed his arm down. The frustration was building inside her. He hadn't changed since she seen him last. Still impeccably dressed in his blazer, crisp white shirt and suit pants. His hair was smoothed back as always and he still looked at her with pleading grey eyes.

"Let me walk you home, it's not safe for a young woman to be by herself at night. Especially not with predators running around."

"He's not a predator! He didn't hurt-" She snapped her mouth shut. She didn't know why she was suddenly defending Kero. Not only that, she wanted to draw as little attention to her association with Kero. That was the last thing her and her father needed.

"Sakura, I know a lot has happened between us," He said lowly and softly. "But let's just-"

"Excuse me, Ms Kinomoto?"

Sakura and Yukito both looked up. Sakura's breath caught and she was stunned for a split second.

"Lieutenant Li." She said, needing to verbally confirm it was him.

Syaoran looked down at them from under his cap. Sakura could even smell the crispness of his uniform. It had been over three months since she'd seen the Lieutenant. She'd forgotten how tall he was. She wondered if she heard her spat with Yukito and came to intervene.

He offered a soft smile that didn't reach his eyes. He looked from Sakura to Yukito. Yukito shifted uncomfortably under the silence.

"H-how can we help you Lieutenant?" Yukito asked and moved slightly towards Sakura in a protective way.

Syaoran ignored his question and focused on Sakura. "Ms Kinomoto, I was hoping I could get a statement from you about what happened tonight. It shouldn't take up too much of your time."

Sakura glanced up at him. The shock from the events had bleached her skin of any colour but her eyes still glowed dark green. She opened her mouth to reply when Yukito intervened.

"Excuse me Lieutenant, but i-isn't that a job for a police officer? And I don't think now is the appropriate timing after what she's just been through."

Syaoran clenched his jaw and casted his eyes down at Yukito. "Yes, luckily enough I am in-charge of this case and my authority outranks everyone here. Now, is there any other part of my job you would like to question?"

"No, Lieutenant." Yukito shuffled uncomfortably and picked at a seam on his knee. Sakura's eyes were on the ground but Syaoran noticed the minute grin that played on Sakura's lips.

"Ms Kinomoto, may I ask you some questions?" He said in a softer voice.

Sakura nodded. "Yes." She had almost forgotten that he was a handsome Lieutenant with flaming amber eyes. His trench coat accented his broad shoulders and arms.

Syaoran said nothing and glanced down at Yukito, who had placed a firm hand on Sakura's arm. Sakura's teethed with frustration and mortification from this.

"I would like to speak to you _alone._ " Syaoran said through a clenched jaw.

Yukito looked to Sakura for resistance but she would not look at him. Yukito slumped his shoulder and stood up. "I'll wait for you over there." Yukito reassured.

Sakura didn't even look up to see where he had pointed. He skulked away and cursed the young Lieutenant under his breath.

With Yukito gone, Syaoran sat down beside her. He took out a small notepad and a pen.

"I'm am sorry about the timing." He said. "It's just that witnesses tend to remember what happened more clearly right after a crime or an attack."

Sakura nodded and tightened the blanket around her shoulders.

"Can you tell me what happened from the beginning?"

Sakura was surprised at the gentleness in his voice. Despite the cold night, she felt the heat coming from him. She recalled the events of the night, leaving out a detail or two of course. Like how she knew who the attacker was and that he knew who she was. She didn't mention that whatever he was doing was the in name of someone else.

She was shocked by his next question. "Did you know your attacker? Was he familiar at all?"

Sakura became rigid and stalled a little too long. "No, I've never seen him before."

"And you're sure about that?"

Sakura looked him in the eye and nodded. As he asked her a few more questions she noted the soft curve in his bottom lip and the rebellious stands of hair that broke free from under his cap. She could see why every girl in Tomoeda would swoon for the young Lieutenant. And she could understand Rika's envy. If she only knew that Sakura had a _second_ encounter with him, Rika would absolutely lose her mind.

"Did he say anything strange to you?"

"What do you mean?" She asked, curling her toes. She tried to keep her face as smooth as possible. She didn't want her expression to betray her lies.

Syaoran gave a little shrug, "Anything that seemed a little odd. Any mention of what side of the wall he lived or worked from?"

Sakura tensed and blinked. She had never heard of anyone referring to the walls so casually. Growing up, the walls had always been taboo, even though they were so obvious there, looming over the citizens. It was like everyone pretended they weren't there.

 _Yes_ , She thought. _Kero Jones lived in 8 Conan street, Mahr Brethain, East Tomoeda and everyday he and my brother would play soccer and laugh and he would eat tons of food and no matter how bleak our reality was, he always had that gap-tooth smile._

Sakura shook her head. "No, he never said anything."

Syaoran nodded. They sat in silence and watched the ambulance take Kero's body bag.

Sakura sucked in a sharp breath. What on earth was Kero doing? She thought of Toya, and how this would kill him.

She felt a lump in her throat thinking about Toya. She sniffled quietly which caught Syaoran's attention.

Sakura flinched slightly when she felt his fingers on the back of her hand. "Are you ok?" He asked.

Sakura looked down at his hand on hers and blushed slightly before pulling her hand away. "Yes, I'm fine."

In the distance, Yukito strained his neck trying to see over the police officers. He paced back and forth, waiting for the Lieutenant to leave.

"Is your house far from here?" Syaoran asked her.

Sakura looked at him suspiciously. "No, about a ten-minute walk. It's not far at all."

"Maybe I should take you home." He said smoothly.

"No, it's fine. I can take care of myself." She said defensively and shot up.

Syaoran stood up too, towering over her. With a crooked smile, he said, "I have no doubt you can Ms. Kinomoto. But after what has happened, I wouldn't feel comfortable letting you walk home by yourself."

Sakura raised an eyebrow. "Thank you Lieutenant, but I'm sure your duties are much needed here. I wouldn't want to take you away from that."

Sakura felt her fight and resistance coming back to her. She even felt the colour returning to her cheeks again.

Syaoran smiled, something that almost made Sakura blushed. "I'm sorry. Maybe you're…boyfriend can take you home." He said looking over at Yukito who seemed like he was desperately trying to lip-read their conversation.

Sakura groaned. She forgot he was still there, waiting on her to be alone so he could swoop in and smother her with unwanted questions and inappropriate affection.

"He's not my boyfriend." She said, a little too quickly.

"He seems very taken with you."

"That's his problem."

Syaoran tucked his notepad into his trench pocket gave Sakura a slight nod. "Well, if you don't need me, I'll take off then."

At that point Yukito was trudging back towards them with an eagerness that made Sakura nervous.

"Well, now that you're all done. Let me take you home." Yukito said and tried to steer her away from Syaoran. Sakura didn't budge except to shrug him off.

"As I've said before. I'm fine."

Yukito persisted. Syaoran sensed her uncomfortableness.

"Yukito." It took Sakura some effort to get the next few words out. "I don't need you to take me home, because Lieutenant Li has offered."

Syaoran tried to mask his amusement. He raised his eyebrow. "I have? When was that?"

Sakura clenched her teeth and glared at him. "Yes, Lieutenant. Just now."

"Oh, no, no don't worry Lieutenant, she should really be with a friend right now. You have duties here." Yukito protested.

"Mr Tsukishiro, isn't that your grandmother? The owner of the library?" Syaoran said nodding in the distance.

Yukito squinted and noticed amongst the crowd, Mrs Tsukishiro looking frazzled and confused as an officer explained to her what had happened.

"I think you should go comfort her. She bound to be in quite a shock. I'll escort Ms Kinomoto home."

Yukito clenched his fists and jaw and cursed the old woman for being there.

"Sakura, call me if you need anything, _anything_." He said and went to hug her.

Sakura took a step back. "Goodbye Yukito." She said in a bored voice and looked away, distracted.

Admitting defeat, he slumped away, dragging his feet. Sakura knew that she would hear from him all too soon.

"I have to grab my bag first." Sakura said.

"I can get that for you."

"It's fine, I have to leave the keys out for Mrs Tsukishiro anyway. It will only take a minute."

Syaoran nodded and watched her go back into the library.

A bullet had shattered the glass of the door. Sakura tip-toed around the mess and walked into the back room with suspicious eyes following her. Once inside she let out a sigh of relief. Had the Lieutenant seen through her lies? Should she be relieved or worried that Syaoran was here? Despite Yukito's ulterior motives he had a point, what was a high ranking detective, the _Generals son_ doing here, Investigating a seemingly under the radar attack. This only heightened her suspicions. It was no coincidence that Kero was here too, now Syaoran, and talk of a rebellion. And somehow…Sakura was related to all of this.

She rubbed her forehead. This was a lot of thinking to do in one evening, she felt exhausted. As she picked up her bag her eyes caught something.

The small grey bag that Kero came into the library with, was sitting innocently under a desk. She almost forgot about it. He seemed so nervous, so sketchy about Sakura knowing its contents. He wanted Ms. Tsukishiro to take it. But for what? What could she do with it?

She peaked inside the bag. She let out a small gasp when her eyes fell onto the titles. They were small notebooks, letters and documents, all dated pre-2016. Before the takeover.

Sakura bit her lip. These books were all strictly illegal. Books before 2016 were strictly forbidden in Tomoeda. And yet these were hand-written, preserved. So why did Kero have them? And more importantly, if Kero was involved in all of this, was Toya?

Sakura heard some commotion coming from the back. In a split second she decided to do something that if caught, she'd certainly get life-imprisonment, or death.

In one quick motion, she swiped the box and let it fall into her bag. As the door behind her opened she swung her bag behind her back. Palm clammy and heart racing walked past the two police officers who were consumed in some sort of funny joke to even notice or question the contents of Sakura's bag. Her feet felt heavy and she resisted the urge to guiltily sprint out the door.

Syaoran was waiting for her with an innocent smile, but an ulterior motive.

X x x

There was no one on the streets as Syaoran walked Sakura home.

Sakura kept her eyes forward and clutched the strap of her rucksack. Despite the chilly night, Sakura tried not to sweat as she walked alongside the Lieutenant. If he even had a peek at what was now in Sakura's bag she would be arrested, detained and most certainly tried for treason for having such illegal documents. Not just her. Her father would certainly be detained. The government would love an excuse to lock Fujitaka up.

Syaoran side-glanced down at her. She politely answered his questions but failed to make eye contact with him.

"So what will you do for work now?" He asked.

Sakura raised an eyebrow. "What do you mean? I'll continue to work at _Happy Books."_

"I'm afraid that the library will be under investigation." He replied. "You won't be able to go back for a couple of weeks at least."

Sakura's heartbeat rose. "But why? What was so special about tonight? In fact, why were you there?"

Syaoran chuckled. "Don't worry about the details about the investigation, or me, for that matter."

Sakura flushed. Was she too direct? Was she acting suspicious?

"I apologize. I'll go back to the job centre, find something different."

"That will be difficult to do won't it? You're not very open with your job criteria."

Sakura stopped in her tracks. She turned slowly to the Lieutenant and said. "How do you know that? Are you checking up on me?" Sakura clutched her bag strap tighter and eyed up the Lieutenant.

Syaoran paused, a little too long for Sakura's liking. He suddenly smiled a bright smile and said. "I was your interviewer, I had to follow up certain things to make sure my decision was right. Please don't look too into it."

"What else do you _check up on_?" She said too sharply, almost completely forgetting who she was talking to. With everything that happened tonight, Sakura was on edge.

"Ms Kinomoto, I think you should watch what you say. It's that attitude which almost got you relocated." His voice was stern, as was his expression. With his manner, so friendly most of the time, Sakura was intimidated when he was serious.

Sakura had to bite her lip to stop herself from challenging him. She was infuriated. Why did he think it was suitable or even right to _check_ her. He was watching her, and she didn't like it. But the harsh reality was, in her world, he would always be allowed to do what he wanted. He was above her, she was below him. She had no right to question his motives.

She looked away and began to walk again. They walked in silence until she could finally see her house up ahead. The light in the living room was still on. Her father was waiting up, worried sick probably. Before they reached her gate she had to ask.

"Why didn't you relocate me?" Sakura asked in a meek voice, afraid of what the reason might be.

Syaoran seemed surprised by her question. He took a moment to consider. Sakura thought he'd tell her it was none of her business. Technically, you're not allowed to inquire about the results of your interview, but Sakura was already not on great terms with the Lieutenant, she might as well ask.

"I mean… I'm sure you considered it. Let's not pretend I did swell job at the interview."

Syaoran considered just shrugging and saying she fitted in here, there was no need to relocate her. But Sakura was sharper than that. She seemed to see through his façade so far, he couldn't get away with that much.

"No, you didn't. And it was a tough one to call but…." Syaoran looked down at his boot and considered how to phrase his words. "You belong here. I can see that. So I kept you here. Are you not satisfied with the results?" He asked.

"I'm sure any recommendation the Colonel Lieutenant makes is suitable." She said which almost made Syaoran laugh.

A silence fell between them. Sakura didn't know why she didn't just turn and leave. Something Rika had said was chewing at the back of her mind. Something that made her stomach drop a little.

"Ms. Kinomoto, may I make a suggestion." Syaoran said.

Sakura nodded, unsure of what he was insinuating. She felt a tightness in her chest.

"You are going to need to find work pretty soon right? There are actually a few positions opening up at the Base, here's my card, I can make a recommendation for you, if you like."

Sakura gulped, her worry was increasing. "You mean Base as in… the South?"

"Yes, there are a lot of preparations ahead of _Utopia Day_ , we're opening up jobs to Eastenders, it's tough to get in, but I can put in a word."

Sakura opened her mouth to say something then closed it. Instead of responding to him she turned around and opened the gate to her house. She was determined to get away from him.

"Ms Kinomoto!" He said and reached out for her arm. He caught her elbow as she closed the gate. It wasn't a rough touch, but his skin on hers did make her stop. Syaoran noticed the sudden panic in her eyes. "What's wrong? It's just a job-"

"I'm not like that!" She said suddenly with slight anger.

"Like what-"

"Why were you here tonight?" She asked again. Before Syaoran could answer she continued. "First, you interview me. You, _you_ the General's son. Why would you do something so trivial like that? _Then_ you're here tonight, asking me questions, walking me home-"

"If I remember correctly, you wanted me to walk you home in the end."

"And you're checking up on me? You didn't relocate me even though I was rude to you and did a horrible interview." Sakura looked him dead in the eye. "Do you think I owe you something?"

Syaoran blinked, stunned.

"Because I don't do that. I won't do you any _favours_ just because you didn't relocate me. And I'm not the type who will stay quiet even if your forced yourself on me-"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa," Syaoran said releasing her from his grasp and taking a step back. "Ms Kinomoto, I assure you that that is _not_ my intention here. I'm sorry if there were any misunderstandings. But I don't, I _never_ will never assume that you _owe_ me anything."

Sakura relaxed a little, her mind eased a bit. Damn Rika for planting those thoughts into her head.

"Fine then, goodnight Lieutenant."

"Wait!"

Sakura turned around and saw him rooting around for something in his breast pocket. He produced a small business card and handed it to her. She was hesitant to take it.

"If you are having problems with employment. I assure you, nothing funny. Just call me and I'll see what I can do."

Sakura took a hasty step towards him and plucked the card from his hand. She looked at both sides of the black card which read his name and number.

She swallowed and nodded, knowing well that she'd dump the card as soon as she went inside.

She gave a brief nod and an awkward bow before disappearing into the house. Syaoran watched as the door closed. His soft smile faded. He sighed. This was going to be harder than he thought. She was smart, quick, and worst of all, she challenged him.

He didn't mean to run into her tonight, that was coincidence, but over the next few months, he would have to orchestrate their run-ins. When he was around Sakura, he was supposed to always be on duty.

Yet, when he spoke to her tonight, his thoughts would sway from light interrogation, to the sweet smell that floated around her, from discerning her truths and lies from focusing on her delicate neck and the sweet sound of her almost perfect English. Yes, indeed, his thoughts had a hard time staying on duty. He was worried about the tinge of jealousy he felt when he saw her with that Yukito guy. He knew it was wrong to feel relief when she rejected Yukito as her boyfriend, and the hurt he felt when she thought he wanted her for perverted motives.

Syaoran sighed again as he turned to make his way back home where he'll have to update his encounter with Sakura into the data log. He disappointed himself. And although he wasn't here to witness tonight, Syaoran could see his father looking down on his conduct with distain and anger.

 _One week earlier…_

 _Syaoran couldn't remember the last time he felt so elated._

 _This rarely happened, in fact, this never happened. His father had requested for him specifically as part of a high-profile military operation._

 _And he wanted Syaoran on board._

 _Syaoran couldn't recall a time when the General put complete trust in him. Syaoran saw the opportunity to finally prove himself, to show his father that he was capable of being the son he wanted._

 _He was nervous, but elated as he made his way across the military base. Other soldiers saluted him as he walked past, Syaoran wondered if they had the same thoughts he had at times._

 _'_ _Typical, General's son gets a promotion. Undeservingly so.'_

 _Syaoran was determined to silence the doubts about him._

 _As he entered the north of the base he kept his face serious. The soldier keeping guard in front of the giant brass doors saluted him and pushed back the door for him to enter._

 _As a child Syaoran had often snuck into his father's office to admire the leather-bound books, the maps and medals that decorated the brown and red room._

 _But now was different, he was entering it as a Colonel Lieutenant._

 _All the eagerness that bubbled inside Syaoran deflated when he entered and saw that he was not alone._

 _Meiling sat adjacent to the General and a few other high ranking soldiers. Meiling was furiously scribbling down notes. When he came in she looked up at Syaoran and gave him a smile before returning to her notes._

 _So Syaoran was not the only one called. He felt heart sink a little more when the General didn't even glance up to acknowledge him._

 _Syaoran took a seat beside Meiling. After a few minutes Lieutenant General Mizuki began the meeting._

 _The projector flashed an image on the white screen. Their eyes fell onto a blurry image of a man's side profile._

 _"_ _This image," Mizuki said. "Was taken as little as three weeks ago within the walls of West Tomoeda. And this image," The projector flashed another picture. "was taken four days ago within East Tomoeda. The man in this picture is thought to be Kero Jones, a former anti-governmental extremist thought to have died on May 3_ _rd_ _five years ago along with four others. The man in the other picture, we suspect is none other than the son of former disgraced journalist, Toya Kinomoto."_

 _"_ _Lieutenant General," A soldier said, "With all due respect, we vigorously searched Marble river and found no bodies but that doesn't mean any of those young people survived. There's just no way they could have."_

 _"_ _But you only recovered three bodies. The bodies of Kero Jones and Toya Kinomoto were never found and with this new evidence, we must presume Toya is still alive."_

 _"_ _How can we find them?" Meiling asked. Her face was alert, eager. She was always ready to pounce on anti-governmental cases. Maybe that's why she soared through the ranks so quickly._

 _"_ _That's why you're here. These are your assignments." Mizuki handed them each a thick folder. Syaoran's was lighter than he expected. When he glanced over at Meiling's hers was thick, heavy with trust._

 _When Syaoran opened his folder, he was stunned to see Sakura's photo staring back at him. The photo was black and white, but he could imagine the intensity of the green in her eyes._

 _"_ _Meiling, I've assignment you to unit A where you will oversee the Western wall. We have no idea how Kero could have possibly slipped into the East. We need you to weed out any traitors, bribe, threaten I don't care, just find out how the hell the they are slipping between the walls."_

 _"_ _Yes ma'am." Meiling replied and practically bounced up and down with the excitement building up in her._

 _"_ _And Lieutenant Li." She said to him. "We're not sure if this is indeed Toya Kinomoto but if it is, there may be a chance that he'll try and get into contact with his father or Ms. Kinomoto. We need you to watch her behaviour, her moves, if she does anything out of the ordinary. Get her to gain your trust, it's better to have her on our side then possibly recruited to the other side. Remember, the Kinomoto family have a strained relationship with the military so it will take a while."_

 _Syaoran felt the heavy weight of disappointment. "Yes ma'am." He replied._

 _Syaoran didn't look at the General, but if he did, he knew that he wasn't looking at him. Monitoring and spying was something he'd done before. He thought at this stage, he would be asked to oversee the West wall._

 _"_ _Lieutenant Li, your job is particularly important._ _The Kinomoto's and the military have repeatedly clashed in the past. Do not let them fool you, slyness and rebellion run in their family. You must constantly be two steps ahead."_

 _Syaoran nodded. He glanced back at Sakura's photo. Her eyes seemed to welcome the challenge._

 _"_ _You are to continue your other duties along with monitoring her. I'll assign assistance to your team."_

 _Syaoran nodded and the rest of the meeting became white noise. In the corner of the room, the General chewed on a fat cigar. His eyes flicked over to meet Syaoran's and in their steely greyness they seemed to say, 'Don't fail me.'_

X x X

When Sakura shut the door behind her she let the silence settle. From the corner of her eye she saw her father asleep on the sofa with his glasses half down his face.

She lightly tapped his shoulder to awaken him.

He mumbled something about waiting up for her but she assured him she was just working late tonight. She decided she'd tell him about the attack tomorrow, there was no point in alarming him so late at night.

When she got into her room she locked the door and snapped the curtains shut.

She threw the rucksack upside down and let the documents that belonged to Kero flutter out of her bag. Her heart was racing, her breathing staggered. She ran her finger over the pages, the opened envelopes, the books. Her eyes fell onto a map. But it wasn't a map of the world as she knew it, for Sakura had only ever laid eyes on a map of Tomoeda which as far as she was concerned, that was the world.

She knew that other countries existed, but she was told by teachers and neighbours that they were 'failed' countries or fallen states that weren't worth including on maps. Sakura struggled to understand the shapes of the other continents that she'd vaguely heard of _'_ _Australia, Europe, Cambodia, Kazakhstan._ She never imaged that there were of many of them.

With trembling hands, she picked up the map and scanned her eyes on it over and over again until finally, she found Tomoeda. It was small, so much smaller than she was led to believe. Tomoeda was an island which sat in the middle of what was called the _Pacific Ocean._ Her mind struggled to comprehend this new information. How could she have been so naïve?

Sakura searched through the other documents. She picked up a thick notebook and stuck inside the cover was a letter. Sakura began to read.

 _Dear Reader,_

 _By the time you find this letter, I will be dead._

 _There is so much I want to tell you, yet so much in Tomoeda is changing, I doubt anything I tell you will make sense. Just know that the Tomoeda you know, or you think you know, is a lie. The rebellion is dying, as is the voice of reason. We are beginning to turn on each other, and that is what they want us to do._

 _You may not see the injustice but believe me, it is there and its worse than you can possibly imagine._

 _The government tell us to look up to them, only for them to look down on us, to divide us through stone walls. Do not stand for this. Do not sit by and let the injustice continue. Do not be a slave to the wrongfulness of the Utopia they think they've created._

 _You may not understand this now, but trust me, the walls are not the answer._

 _For the rebellion to succeed, the three M's must be defeated._

 _The media, the military, and the monarch._

 _Don't believe what they tell you, don't believe their version of Utopia, believe only what you see._

 _It is too late for me, but not for you._

 _Long live the rebellion,_

 _Nathala B. Omerson_

Sakura's hands trembled. Her thought paused, unsure of where to go to next. Her thumb stroked Nathala's signature.

'Lone live the rebellion'… That was one of the last things Toya said before he died.

A strange sensation coursed through her body. She felt that for the first time, her life of constant suspicion and questioning finally had justification. Then she felt something else, adrenaline. She ceased to tremble and felt herself swell with a sense of purpose.

Maybe it was fate that brought her to Happy Books, and brought Kero to her. Either way, Sakura knew she had a mission, though it was not clear yet.

In that second, she made a vow to herself. She would find out the truth, and she would expose it, even if it cost her her life…

X X X

 **I'm sorry it's taking so long for this story to take off.**

 **I'll try to update more regularly :)**

 **The next chapter will bring in new characters. Thanks for reading :)**


	4. The King's Daughter

**Please enjoy!**

"No…p-p-please. You know I can't do that." He stuttered.

He had his naked back to the wall and quivered as he gathered his garments around his groin, suddenly modest of his nudity.

She raised an eyebrow at him slanted her mouth into a crooked smile. Twenty minutes ago, that smile charmed his pants down to his ankles. Now, that smile was coupled with the crazy look in her eyes. He should have believed the warnings about her. But with a face as majestic as hers, and a body which looked carved out of marble, he couldn't resist.

"I-I couldn't even if I wanted to-"

She silenced him with her finger as her head swayed back and forth.

"Oh, Tommy, let's not go there." Her voice came out dark and silky.

Her silk dressing gown barely clung to her naked body. Her wild raven hair fanned out over her shoulders. But it was her piercing blue eyes that kept him in his place.

He shuddered again. He had heard all the hearsay about her. But when they were alone…he didn't think she could be any of those things. Again, he shook his head. His heart pounded.

"I don't know what you're talking about. I don't have access to anything like that."

"Anything like….what?" She was close to him now. His eyes travelled up to meet her face. He never realized how tall she was. She towered over him with an intimidating presence. After another few antagonizing seconds of silence, she raised an eyebrow.

"Tommy, I know you have a cousin in the west. I just need this one favour. That way, I don't have to report to the Lieutenant about our little rendezvous here." She smiled crookedly. "I think that would be disastrous for you. She placed her hand on the wall, cornering him between the light pink wall and the wardrobe.

He began to sweat and clutched his garments. Her startling blue pierced through him.

"P-P-Princess, please. I can't do that. I'm a transfer from the East. Do you know how often someone like me gets here? Never, it _never_ happens. I can't go back to the East, there's nothing for me there-"

"That's not my problem now, is it?" She grazed the back of her finger against his cheek. "Now, I want ten ounces of 'Skif' and four sticks of bluethorn-"

"What? I c-can't get you that! Even if I could there's no way I could sneak that into here. Princess please, I need this job. I'll get you what I can but I can't guarantee-"

"Try." She said and patted his flushed cheek. She leaned in close and said. "Because trust me Tommy your job could be replaced with by a monkey."

A knock came from the door which made Tommy flinch. The princess didn't move. She cocked her head to the side and watched the door handle turn. Tommy frantically thrusted on his trousers and fiddle with the buttons of his shirt.

The door opened and a boot came to sight. When he entered Tommy's face went white. The princess smirked and lowered her hand from the wall.

The man darted his eyes from one to another and sighed. "Princess."

"Oh, Syaoran. No need to be so formal." She said and beamed a smiled.

He clenched his jaw in annoyance and looked at Tommy struggling to put on his jacket.

He sharpened his posture and saluted Syaoran clumsily, his belt still loose around his hips. "L-Lieutenant Colonel. This isn't, I- The princess."

"Back to your station." Syaoran said dismissively. Syaoran's nostrils flared in annoyance as Tommy half ran past him and out the door.

She chuckled darkly and floated over to the bed. Syaoran closed the door but kept his eyes on her. She cocked her head to the side and smiled coyly, daring him to scowl her. After a minute stare-off, he relaxed his posture. He pinched the bridge of his nose. He felt a headache coming.

"Something on your mind, Syaoran?" She made no attempt to cover herself.

"Tomoyo…. I've told you to please leave the soldiers alone. I really don't want to have to fire Tommy. He's a good kid. Albeit, I thought he'd have more will-power."

Tomoyo, princess of Tomoeda, shrugged. "What can I say Syaoran, I'm bored. Where have you been? I've been missing you. Now that your daddy has promoted you are you too busy to see me anymore?" She said with fake dismissiveness. Syaoran knew she was agitated about something.

"I've been busy." He answered. "What is it that you want from Tommy? He's just a boy." Syaoran relaxed and took a seat by the wall. He removed his cap and placed it on his knee.

Tomoyo tossed her hair over her shoulders and gave a seductive smile. "Why, Syaoran, are you jealous?"

Syaoran sighed and didn't reply. He noticed she'd gotten thinner since he saw her last. Although stunning, the element of insanity was still present in her eyes.

"Tomoyo…" He said and made his way over to her side. He sat on the soft bed covers and looked straight into eyes. She twirled a piece of raven hair around her finger, seemingly oblivious to the seriousness of his voice. "Have you been taking our meds?"

Her hand froze mid-twirl and she narrowed her eyes at him. "Are you checking up on me Lieutenant?" She sneered through her teeth. "You're here because my father asked you to be, aren't you?"

"No, Tomoyo. I'm genuinely worried about you."

"Don't be." She snarled.

Syaoran took a deep breath and tried to get her to calm down.

"Tomoyo, you know today is important. Not just for your father, but for Tomoeda. They need you…"

"They need me to not be myself." She said with a tinge of hurt.

"They love you Tomoyo, they just want you to be ok."

"Sure, noting says ' _I love you darling'_ quite like five different kinds of meds for breakfast."

"I'm asking you as a friend Tomoyo, are you taking them?"

Tomoyo's jaw clenched. She tossed her head towards the window. The view stretched all the way to the sea. The castle was perched on the tallest hill in North Tomoeda. She could almost see the walls that separated them from the east and west. Some days she just sat there for hours looking at it as if it were a long grey snake frozen under her gaze. She'd never been to the west, today would be the first time.

"Tomoyo?"

"I'm not taking those meds anymore." She said as if that finalized the decision.

"If they're making you feel unwell, just tell the doctor and he-"

"They're not making me _feel_ anything. That's the problem." She snapped. "And if my father is so worried about me making a scene, then maybe he shouldn't take me today."

"You know you have to be there Tomoyo. All of you have to be there otherwise it send out a bad message. You're supposed to show unity and working towards Utopia-"

"Don't. Syaoran." She said and darted her eyes towards him. "Don't talk like that. You don't talk like that. Your father does, my father does. But _you_ don't. And that's why you're my friend."

Syaoran sighed again. She had dark circles under her eyes. She never used to be like this. When they were children, she had a beautiful smile, a freeness around her that was infectious to Syaoran.

But then they grew up, and the duties of their parents demanded so much from them. Syaoran didn't know at what point Tomoyo's laughter became dark, or when she began to voice her crazy thoughts. Then again, Syaoran wasn't the same as when he was a boy. He, too had changed. Yet he still cared about his childhood friend. That is what prompted him to do what he did next.

He glanced at the door. It was silent. He slid his hand into his breast pocket and took out a small plastic bag of grey pills. Tomoyo's face lit up and she almost clapped her hands and squealed in delight. She went to grab it But Syaoran held it back.

"Tomoyo, this can't be like last time, ok? Only one. _One_ pill."

Tomoyo was so fixated on the bag that she only half heard what he said. "You really are my best friend." She said.

Syaoran felt his heart sink. No, he was no friend. Giving illegal substances to his friend wasn't what he should have done. He _should_ have been around more. Talked to her more. Or even better, talked to her father, _his_ father. She was troubled. But he had duties elsewhere. This was just a quick fix for now. Today of all days, Tomoyo had to be at her calmest. If something went wrong, there could be serious consequences for her.

She took them from him and stashed it in the top drawer of her vanity table. This seemed to calm her down as she slid into the chair of the vanity table calmly with a small smile. She threw one leg over the other and began to brush her luscious black hair.

"Anyway," She said. "You'll be there beside me, so I don't see how anything can get too out of hand."

Syaoran clutched his hat tighter. "Actually, Tomoyo…" He trailed off.

Tomoyo stopped brushing her hair and looked at him in the mirror. Realization creeped across her face and a look of panic seized her. "You're…not coming?"

"I'm sorry. I've had new duties assigned to me."

"More important than me?" She said raising her voice.

"Tomoyo," He said and pulled up a stool beside her. "You're going to be fine."

"But you always come with me to these things…you're my…..my only friend." She sighed. It was times like these that Syaoran questioned the rumours about her. Her mother made it out that Tomoyo was uncontrollable. Her father was too concerned about her carrying the bloodline on and everyone else…well, no one else knew about her really. Because Tomoyo only ever lived inside the monarchs gates. She'd never been to the other parts of North Tomoeda. The parts where celebrities, socialites and upper class lived. It was too dangerous, she was too much of a target.

She had left the palace grounds before, but heavily guarded. But today would be the first time in her life to leave the north. The king was scheduled to give a speech in the west to boost morale in preparation of 'Utopia Day', to celebrate seventeen years of the established regime.

Apart from the risks the monarch was taking by stepping into western lands, where the relationship between the monarch was strained, one of the main concerns was Tomoyo. Because Tomoyo was unpredictable, and there was no room in that in Utopia.

"I'm sorry Tomoyo. You know if I could, I'd come with you. But I really can't."

Tomoyo nodded and continued to brush her hair in slow, sad strokes. They sat in silence for a while. Syaoran tried to say something to make her feel better.

Tomoyo giggled. "Isn't is pathetic? I thought by this stage I'd have more friends."

"You could do worse."

Tomoyo gave a wry smile to hide the truth behind her words. Syaoran was truly the only person she could call a friend. Then her eyes met his in the mirror with a look of such vulnerability that made Syaoran's breathing stop. She was stunning, but so tormented. He wondered if he could have helped her more if he agreed to marry her like their fathers wanted them too. He knew he made the right choice when he refused. But in the end it was one of Tomoyo's episodes that had ceased his father from pushing him.

In his father's words, _"_ _The last thing that I need is for my son to marry a shrieking psycho-path.'_

She continued to look at Syaoran, searching for the answer to a question.

"I'm not crazy, you know that, don't you?"

Syaoran was taken aback by her question. She's never been so direct before.

"I know, Tomoyo, I know."

She nodded, already distracted by her own thoughts. "I'm not crazy," She mumbled to herself. "They think I am, but I'm not. They're the ones whose crazy."

The door clicked behind them. Layla, Tomoyo's maid shuffled in with Tomoyo's gown for the evening. Syaoran stood up and walked towards Tomoyo. He placed a hand on her shoulder and gave it a tight squeeze. Tomoyo nodded and he turned to leave.

"Come see me as soon as you can." She called over her shoulder.

Syaoran agreed but just before he left he caught her eye in the mirror and mouthed; _"_ _Only one."_ Referring to the pills. Layla was too busy unzipping Tomoyo's gown to notice. Tomoyo nodded with a sincere smile, but as soon as Syaoran left she popped three into her mouth and sneered at herself in the mirror.

Layla rolled her eyes. _"_ _Crazy girl."_ She thought.

X x x

Layla and two maids worked feverously on Tomoyo's hair and makeup. Tomoyo squirmed a little at first to the maids annoyance but after about forty minutes she felt the effects of the drugs. She calmed down and stopped protesting. At the end, she knew she looked stunning. Even the maids took a second to awe at her. Her hair was pulled back from her face to show her pronounced cheekbones, the fullness of her lips, and the intensity of her ice blue eyes.

Tomoyo's gown was a pale blue and simple. They draped a white sash on her shoulder. Behind her, a beautiful sparkling crown sat on a royal blue cushioned case, waiting to perch on top of her head.

Thought beautiful, Tomoyo didn't crack a smile. For it was all for nothing. The hours they put into it would never be seen. Now came the part that always made the maids sigh. Layla produced a long, sheer veil. It was light, airy, and royal purple. Tomoyo kneeled so that Layla could carefully place it over her head. It caressed Tomoyo's skin and cascaded towards the floor. Then Tomoyo felt the weight of the crown being placed upon her head, holding the sheer in place.

Layla guided her round so Tomoyo could see herself in the mirror.

Tomoyo's eyes flickered up to her reflection where all she could see was her veiled face and upper body with her gloved hands falling from under it. Her crown sat gloriously on top of her veiled head. Tomoyo could no longer see the work the maids did to her hair and makeup.

Layla added some touches to the veil and mumbled in her thick Eastern accent, "It's for security only, your majesty. We can't have them brutes in the West memorizing your face. There's a high price for your head you know."

Tomoyo wasn't listening anymore. She was in her own world. The maids took her by the hands and guided her out of her room, out of the castle and for the first time in her life, out of the North.

X X X

The security around the Northern-west wall had never been higher.

Tomoyo lost count of the number of soldiers she saw as the car swept by. She had kept silent the whole time. Her mother made comments and light conversation but Tomoyo was almost too afraid to speak. An hour into the drive and the drugs had a strong hold over her. She had felt calmer, too calm, suspiciously calm. Her younger brother, Davy sat with wide eyes as the comfort of the palace slipped away from view and was replaced with the lush greenery of the west.

"This is important Tomoyo, your father is counting on us all to do our best. Please, please behave yourself." Her mother said while adjusting her crown.

Queen Sonomi couldn't see Tomoyo's glare from under her purple veil. Tomoyo toyed with the idea of being unpredictable. But even she knew that today was not a day for her antics.

It took Tomoyo great strength to utter, "Yes, mother."

The car came to a subtle stop. Sonomi grimaced as she looked outside to see a rather rough looking man waiting outside for them. Sonomi took a hesitant step of the car. Her heel sunk into the soft soil and she crinkled her nose at the sight of him.

"Tomoyo?"

Tomoyo looked down to see Davy staring up at her. "Come on, what are you doing?" He asked and raised a blond eyebrow.

Tomoyo saw that everyone was waiting for her. The drugs were making her motor skills slow. Everyone mistook it for hesitance. Tomoyo was greeted by an earthly scent. She had never smelt anything like it in her life.

The older man bowed deeply. Tomoyo looked at his ill fitted clothes. She couldn't decide whether or not he had made an effort to look like this or if he was having a bad day.

"Your majesty," He began. "It is an honour to have you visit the west. It is an exciting day for all."

Sonomi kept her posture poker straight and her face stony. "Has the King arrived yet?" She said sharply.

The man smiled a wry smile and nodded. "Yes, your majesty. He is waiting for you."

"And exactly _how_ are we supposed to enter? Are we supposed to walk by these criminals unprotected? In the open?"

The man clenched his jaw and pulled a tight smile. Sonomi's insults were hitting a sore spot. "Of course not your majesty. We have installed a tunnel here for you to enter. It is completely secure with military to guide you to and from the stage."

Sonomi gave the slightest nod and clicked her fingers at one of the guards. He immediately came to their side and escorted them into the tunnel entrance. Tomoyo felt incredibly light. She rubbed her nose against the veil, aweing at the feel of the material.

"What are you doing!?" Sonomi snapped.

Tomoyo was too slow to reply.

"Have you taken the meds?" She snapped in a low whisper.

They were entering the tunnel now. It was lit up on the inside with banners that read, _'_ _The West believes in Utopia'_ and _'_ _All hail the King of Tomoeda'_

Tomoyo admired the banners and the beautiful loops in their handwriting. Tomoyo let out a high giggle, for everyone know it was a lie. No one hated the Monarch more than the West. There was a reason Tomoyo had to be covered, a reason none of the royal family ever came to the west.

"What are you laughing at?" Her mother hissed and grabbed her by the elbow. She sunk her nails into Tomoyo. "Tomoyo I'm warning you. One slip up today and I will send you straight to that mental home-"

Sonomi trailed off as they entered into the open part of the tunnel. Tomoyo's eyes expended as she saw hundreds of people milling around in preparation.

"My God!" Sonomi gasped. "What's happening? Can they see us?" She asked.

"No, your majesty. This part of the tunnel is transparent only to us. We can see them, they can't see us."

The outside of the tunnel was lit up with illuminous writing that read slogans for Utopia. As Sonomi and Tomoyo entered it, all the outsiders could see was the illuminations.

"Well is it bullet proof? What if they decide to attack us?"

"Completely bullet proof ma'am. There's no getting through this."

Tomoyo whirled around and saw the wall stretched out behind her. She was in the West now. She felt a sudden rush of adrenaline. She was no longer in the North, it was a strange sensation for her. Then her eyes fell on the people. She'd never seen such sullen faces. Their clothes were only shades of brown, grey and white. Unlike the royal fanfare of colours she and other in the castle wore. She blinked twice and questioned whether it was the drugs playing tricks on her. Maybe she should have listened to Syaoran.

"My God…" Sonomi gasped. "Look at them, they're like savages. Ready to pounce."

Tomoyo's breathing quickened. She had never seen anyone like them before. Their postures seemed to be broken and a smile didn't touch any of their faces. Even the children's faces had frown lines. She spotted a few people with torn up shoes, and some children who had none.

They walked along the transparent tunnel so close, Tomoyo was convinced they could would be able to sense her.

Davy grabbed Tomoyo's hand an squeezed it tight. Even though he was twelve he was frightened. He was never exposed to this environment before. Tomoyo's reaction was one of awe. She took in the rich foliage and the different shades or earth.

Ahead of them, the King was re-reading his speech. Tomoyo was use to seeing him in his royal clothing. But the backstage men stopped to gawk at the rich materials of his red and black clothing. Sonomi and Davy took comfort in his presence. When they arrived by his side he patted Davy's head and kissed Sonomi's hand. Tomoyo kept her distance. Her relationship with her father was, as always, strained. He was the same height as Tomoyo, with a fat bushy moustache.

"Tomoyo," He said with a calm voice, almost too afraid to agitate her.

Tomoyo gave a slight bow but said nothing.

"You are going to be seated beside me." He said.

"Why?" Tomoyo said which earned her a daggered look from her mother.

"I mean," Tomoyo said, correcting herself. "Why not mother?"

"Because," he said. "As the next in line for the throne, you should be seated by my side. It's tradition. You mother and Davy will sit to my left. Understood?" He asked, though Tomoyo knew it wouldn't be up for discussion.

She was thankful her veil disguised the annoyance on her face.

"Excuse me, King Daidouji, we're ready for you now."

The King nodded and leaned on knee as his ruby encrusted crown was placed on top of his head.

Tomoyo unwillingly linked arms with her father as they entered into the huge platform. The crowd was already seated and Tomoyo flinched when a fanfare of trumpets played as the entered. What happened next was blurry to Tomoyo. The King lead her to her seat which was harder then she expected. When she looked up she froze. The was a three inch layer of bullet proof glass which separated the westerners from the royals.

She was use to sitting in front of a crowd, it was nothing new to her. But as her eyes skimmed the faces of the people, her hands began to shake. Behind the glass, there were few people smiling, some annoyed looked sat of their faces. But many some who beamed smile that was so false their eyes twitched from the effort. The children who squirmed as eyed the heavily armed soldiers, made Tomoyo's heart break. She wanted to reach out them and hug them as if they were her little brother.

There was a tense atmosphere. Even her father, who was so confident among his people, seemed reserved.

The tense atmosphere, coupled with the drugs working fast in her system made Tomoyo panic.

The King began his speech. _'_ _Today, marks a glorious day in history. Since its birth, the Tomoedan regime has worked hand in hand with citizens of the North and West…'_

Tomoyo felt it hard to breath, her chest tightened. Beside her Sonomi beamed proudly at her husband, ignoring the crowds lack of enthusiasm. Tomoyo tapped her foot nervously, Her father's speeches were always long. She had to hang in there.

 _'_ _Why didn't I listen to Syaoran.'_ She thought. _'_ _Why did I take three?'_

As Tomoyo tried to keep herself under control, she, along with the rest of the monarch and the soldiers, didn't notice the young woman sitting at the far back peeling back her shirt. Beneath it was a black t-shirt written in a language spoken only in the west. She rooted around her bag for the switch. When she found it, her fingers caressed it. She kicked back her seat and threw her arm in the air.

"Down with the regime!" She roared. "The rebellion has awoken!"

Before the nearest soldier could even identify where the voice came from, the woman pressed the switch and a thunderous sound boomed from under the stage.

X x x

Tomoyo couldn't tell if the scream was coming from her or her mother. Her blurred vision made out silhouettes running in every direction. There was another small explosion near her that made the ground tremble beneath her.

Someone nearby was shouting orders and she recognized the sound of boots on the ground. The undeniable sound of bullets and screams shocked Tomoyo's senses into alert. She scattered back onto her feet and leaned against the wooden wall. A giant pillar had fallen from the ceiling and smashed the centre of the stage, just a mere foot from where she was.

Her eyes fell on the bullet proof glass, which had an enormous crack down the centre, threatening to shatter. The fire that had started on the stage was spreading rapidly.

Her hearing came back to her and she was overwhelmed by the sound of screams. The perfect seating was in shambles as more people deserted the venue. She saw hordes of people dressed in black attacking soldiers. But she failed to notice the man glaring at her from the other side of the glass.

He had a crazed look in his eye and his breathing was heavy. Filled with rage he grabbed a steel chair and flung it at the glass. Tomoyo shrieked as the crack expanded. She now saw the man smiling, happy with the progress he made. He grabbed another chair and repeatedly attacked the glass, never taking his eyes of her.

"I'm going to get you!" He screamed. "I'll tear you face off and wear it too!"

Tomoyo jolted upwards and staggered away from her. The drugs were still in her system which heightened the fear. She looked around but could not see her family anywhere. The fire was now blocking her escape. The soldiers were overwhelmed trying to keep the attackers from entering the stage. The man continued to smash the glass, getting closer to Tomoyo. She had no choice but to exit through the transparent tunnel.

She fled towards the tunnel, the smoke began to choke her lungs. Her crown dragged out of her scalp. The veil hampered her vision and she fought with the clips to untangle herself. She headed for the light of the tunnel.

Suddenly she heard a smash beside her. The man had followed her along the outside of the tunnel. He was looking directly at her, but that was impossible. She took a step forward as did he. She began to shake her head in disbelief.

The man slowly pointed up and Tomoyo's eyes followed. The ceiling of the tunnel was smashed. It had destroyed the electrical circuit.

"I…see…you.." He said.

Tomoyo bolted as fast as her legs could go. To her horror, the exit was bolted shut. She smashed the door and screamed for help. Then she heard a laugh. Slowly, Tomoyo looked left and saw a gaping hole in the glass, enough for him to throw his upper body into. He reached for her and she recoiled back to the other side. It wouldn't be difficult for him break enough glass to enter.

"Come here! Come here so I can get a look at you!" He roared and laughed when she began to whimper.

With the effect of the drugs made his features were exaggerated. She swore that his teeth were daggered and his eyes were blood red. Her breathing came quick and shallow. He was going to get her. She was going to die here…

A shot was fired and suddenly his body went limp. Tomoyo' voice caught in her throat. He slumped to the ground. Behind him, Lieutenant Meiling Li gun was still smoking. Behind her a man and a woman charged for her but she took them down with two swift bullets. There was almost a grin of satisfaction on her face as she did so. She then turned her gun to a small girl who held a flimsy wooden bat in her hand. Meiling snickered and cocked the gun at her.

Tomoyo held her breath. The little girl was paralyzed in fear. Tomoyo buried her face into her hands and prayed that this would end. She never heard the gun go off.

Tomoyo peaked through her fingers and saw Meiling had been tackled to the ground and knocked out. Above her, a man stood tall with his back to her. He turned around and knelt beside the man who was trying to kill Tomoyo.

"Takashi, Takashi are you alive?" He said and shook the man's body.

Takashi flinched, signalling he was still alive.

Tomoyo sat, paralyzed in fear and something else. Her eyes fell onto the man, his unruly dark hair, his rugged face, his tanned skin, and his deep blue eyes. Tomoyo's breath caught. He was the most beautiful man she'd ever seen.

He called Takashi's name, trying to get a response. Despite the chaos continuing behind him, Tomoyo couldn't hear anything but his masculine voice. He looked wild, untamed, and unlike anything she'd ever seen in North Tomoeda. Tomoyo blinked twice and swore she saw a glow around him. The drugs made it hard for her to distinguish what was real or not anymore.

She was infatuated with him.

His eyes suddenly flickered up, as if sensing Tomoyo's eyes fixated on him. He squinted and leaned forward which made Tomoyo notice his toned shoulders and arms, giving away signs of hard labour.

He thought he made out her crouching silhouette, but he was unsure. But her crown winked in the light and he was certain. He could see her. Tomoyo sensed she had been caught. But instead of fleeing, she hesitantly rose to her feet. As did he. Their actions mirrored each other through the glass. He was tall, taller than she imagined. She needed to see him better. She took a small step forward, unexplainably pulled towards him like a magnet.

He stayed perfectly still and let her come to him.

Tomoyo's mouth fell open with wonder. She wanted to touch his skin which had greyed with the smoke from the fire. Tomoyo fell oblivious the roaring fire which was slowly creeping nearer to her. Her veil still hampered her view.

The voice of reason had abandoned her as she slowly brought her gloved hand up to her veil. Slowly, she peeled the veil back upwards. She wanted- no, she _needed_ to see him. The man continued to look at her with intense blue eyes, willing her to unveil herself.

As Tomoyo was locked into a trance with him, she never noticed his hand reaching for the dagger in his back pocket. She wasn't close enough to reach yet, so he patiently waited for her to come closer. She did. He tightened his grip around the knife. Just a little closer and he had her…

The veil was at her chin, reaching her bottom lip….

A harsh _clank_ followed a few thuds frightened Tomoyo back a step and she dropped her veil. The metal doors screeched open and soldiers burst through.

The man couldn't let this chance escape. He went to lunge at her in hopes that her could still reach her. But before he could do anything he heard someone shout his name.

"Eriol! Eriol we're retreating! They've too many to overtake!"

Eriol looked back and saw more military move in with tanks. He looked back for Tomoyo but she had already been swept up by soldiers. He cursed himself for acting too slow. He threw Takashi's body over his broad shoulder and ran for the forest, narrowly missing bullets.

 _Shit!_ He thought. _She was right there! So close!_ A tank fired behind him in the distance. It was only a matter of time before soldiers would be on their trail. _She won't get away next time. Next time, I will kill her…_

X x x

Tomoyo was still in severe shock by the time she arrived back to the palace. As she was rushed outside the perimeter on the West the chaos was somehow even louder. As she looked behind her there was a thick rise of black smoke wafting above the wall.

The drugs were finally wearing off bit this only heightened her paranoia. Was it all real or did she imagine parts of it? What about that man who chased her? Was Tomoyo and her family really so hated that it caused the scene from today? Tomoyo couldn't understand why they would hate her family so much.

When they finally arrived back at the palace, Tomoyo rushed into the palace, tearing her veil and crown off in the process.

"Davy?" She shouted, her heart suddenly in shock with worry over her brother. "Davy!"

She breathed a sigh of relief when she seen him sitting in a lounge chair with a blanket placed around his shoulder. Two maids were attending to him. One of them patted his forehead with a damp cloth. The maid herself had quite a gash on her forehead.

"Davy. Are you ok? I was so worried something happened to you-"

"And where the hell were you!" Her mother shrieked behind her. Tomoyo mistook her tone for that of a worried mother. Tomoyo turned around to explain but she was met by a cold slap to the cheek.

Tomoyo was too stunned to recognize her own mother had hit her.

"You little bitch!" Sonomi screamed and grabbed Tomoyo by the elbow. "You'd just do anything to ruin your father's reputation won't you!? Won't you!"

"What are you talking about?"

"You slipped away from us as soon as you couldn't didn't you? Were you trying to teach us a lesson? Were you?"

"I was knocked unconscious and you didn't even bother to come back for ME! And you're blaming _me_ for it? The fire was blocking the way out I had to leave via the tunnel it's not my fault!" Tomoyo argued. New found rage was bubbling inside her. How was it that at a time like this her mother could make it her fault.

"You were seen you little harlot! A soldier saw you practically hand yourself over to one of the western savages! Do you hate us that much that you'd give yourself up to them? Because let me tell you, little missy, they don't deal I ransom money! They'll cut your head clean off your shoulders, if I don't do it FOR THEM!" Sonomi was spitting with rage as she talked. Her nails buried themselves into Tomoyo's arm.

Tomoyo was speechless. That never happened. She was usually good at denying her mother's crazy allegations, but this time she had been caught. She couldn't lie out of it. In fact, she couldn't even explain her actions at the time.

"I swear to Utopia Tomoyo, I will send you to an asylum so quick you won't even have time to _think_ of crying to your father!" She hissed lowly so Davy, who unfortunately was witnessing all of it, couldn't hear.

"Sonomi…" The King said calmly.

Tomoyo snapped her head up. How long had he been standing there? Letting her mother accuse her of obscene things.

"Don't Sonomi me!" She snapped back. "I'm tired of this Ralph! And I'm tired of you defending her!"

The King sighed but did not attempt to intervene. He stirred his drink in his hand with a heavy look on his face. Tomoyo rolled her eyes at her father's lack of action within family matters.

"I am done with this Tomoyo. You are on lockdown. You do not leave the palace walls, you are getting double security and you will go to EVERY event hosted in the palace and go to EVERY even you fathers speaks at! Am I clear!?"

"Mother, I am twenty-three." Tomoyo snickered. "You _cannot_ force me to do _anything_."

"How about this then. I've already filled out your papers to the 'Tomoeda Halo Mental Institute' and all it needs is my signature. One more incident from you, you're gone. Try me." She threatened.

Tomoyo looked over to her father for some, _any_ sort of back up. But had kept his eyes downcast as if he didn't hear a word at all. 

Determined not to show her mother that she'd was shaken, Tomoyo lingered with a crooked smile, as if satisfied to have riled Sonomi up so much. Her father sat in the corner and listened intently to the radio. He had so much more to think about, like how the military and the media could cover up the disastrous events of today.

As Tomoyo ascended the grand staircase, she caught the tail end of today's new report.

 _'_ _His majesty King Ralph graced the western lands today in preparation towards this year's 'Utopia'. He was well received by locals after giving a stunning speech on our vital part in maintaining Utopia…'_

Tomoyo thought she'd misheard. She waited for the broadcast to resume, speaking about the attack that unfolded afterwards. But instead, the broadcasted moved onto an interview with the organizing committee leader for Utopia Day. Nothing more was said about today's events.

Tomoyo put her head in her hand. She scurried to her room and threw herself onto the silky sheets. Did that really happen today? The explosion? The fire? The screams? Were they all just muddled up into one giant hallucination? The beautiful man with the sapphire eyes?

Tomoyo rolled onto her back and let a grin spread across her face.

No, it wasn't a hallucination, because _he_ was real. Tomoyo's heart fluttered just remembering his face. How could she have even forgotten about him? He was so…wild looking. And that is what Tomoyo was at heart. She felt herself walking towards him today, but she didn't know why. She just wanted to tear off her veil and leap into the chaos with him. Tomoyo wanted to touch his bronzed skin, the stubble on his face. She wanted to smell the sweat on his neck, touch his thick black hair. The stillness around him amongst the chaos as he waited for her to come to him. It was an urge she felt deep inside her. She knew nothing of who he was, but she _had_ to know. It wasn't just his appearance, it was everything around him. The danger, him risking his life to save his friend (even though he was _her_ attacker.) It was a whole world Tomoyo couldn't even dare to imagine.

For twenty three years Tomoyo had floated inside palace walls. As the years went by and her friends had departed for other duties, loneliness crept in day by day, year by year. The company of maids and servants did not help during Tomoyo's adolescence. In the loneliness, she began to talk to herself, only to entertain herself to fill the quietness. It was harmless, just a bored little girl with too much imagination. But then one day the servants overheard her asking herself where she should eat her lunch. Servants talk. The rumour spread that the young princess was not sound of mind. When she became older, she began to voice her thoughts out loud to herself, not caring if others heard and almost delighting in their frightened reactions.

Then she turned twenty-two, and that's when things de-escalated rapidly. Being a legal adult put her at more of a risk. As the first heir to the throne, she was to make more public appearances. That's when she had to start wearing the veil. That's when she was forbidden to be seen at places like 'Golden Garden' or 'Crystal Hills'. Those places were not suitable for the heir to the throne.

Her friends disappeared. Either due to the celebrity life in other parts of North Tomoeda, or because the lonelier the princess was, the seemingly crazier she became. She couldn't resign herself to the dull conversations held at tea parties or social events. And she resented the suitors her mother picked for her. The one thing she would not do, was comply with a forced or arranged marriage. She reinforced her defiance by fooling around with on duty soldiers, getting caught up in scandals and reeling in delight at the palaces attempts to cover up for her. But mainly, she did it to fill up the loneliness and boredom. The only suitor she showed interest in was Syaoran, her oldest friend. A marriage between the Monarch and Military would be nothing but fantastic for North-South Tomoedan relations. But Syaoran, being sound of mind, rejected this idea and settled on a friendship. Something which Tomoyo later was happy with.

The drug usage only came in in the recent six months, for even Tomoyo was tired of herself and her actions from time to time.

She rolled onto her back and stared up at the high ceiling. She breathed in and out and repeated the same thing she did every night.

 _'_ _You're not crazy. They're crazy.'_

Another crooked smile spread across her face. Up until today her life seemed doomed to the same fate as her mothers. But now she seen him, she'd seen a hunger and a wildness in his eyes that she identified with. It had confirmed something she knew since she was a child.

She was born on the wrong side of the wall.

It was clear now.

Tomoyo promised herself that she'd somehow escape from the palace. She'd return to the west, even if it killed her.

X X X

 **I hope you enjoyed reading. Eriol only got a short appearance in this chapter, but more of him to come in following chapters.**

Eriol glanced out at the darkening sky over the Western hills.

The tanks would roll in soon. There would be hell to pay today. He tightened his hand into a fist and let the curtain fall back into place.

Behind him, Takeshi groaned in pain. The nurses stopped the bleeding, but he would need to rest. Takashi's eyes squinted in the small, cramped room. Two candles served as the only light.

"Eriol…" He croaked and winced in pain.

Eriol patted Takeshi's shoulder and said nothing, for he was the silent type. A man of few words, yet well loved by the villagers.

"Rest. Takashi."

"Eriol!" He said again and reached out to grab his wrist.

Takashi's eyes were wild. Through his dry, cracked lips he whispered. "I saw the… I saw…the princess." His hand began to shake with slow rage. "I was so close Eriol. So close but…I'm sorry. I failed. I didn't see her face…"

Takashi couldn't continue.

Eriol placed his hand over his friends. "I know, I saw her too. Don't worry." He said in a low voice. "If she, or any of them ever come back, they won't get away..."

X X X


	5. The Rebel's Son

**Please enjoy :)**

It had been a day since the attack on the king in the West, yet Eriol's anger had not subsided.

Takashi's wounds would heal, but others weren't so lucky. The villagers in the outer western area plagued him with questions,

 _'_ _Are we going to be ok?'_

 _'_ _Will the military come back for us?'_

 _'_ _Did we succeed?'_

 _'_ _How many of ours died?'_

 _'_ _How many of theirs died?'_

Eriol could not give any satisfying answers, because this mission, this…. attack was not orchestrated by him. In fact, he was very much out of the loop. Seeing the villagers, innocent and not innocent being chartered off into military vans stirred frustration and anger in him. His mother, was noticeably absent, avoiding him, probably.

Eriol was the silent type, not one to express his emotions in public. So, he took to the fields and worked until his hands were raw and the anger faded. He was used to hard labour, it's all he's ever known.

When he returned, he saw the hysterics had calmed down. People still milled around, casting an eye on the plains below for tanks. As he walked through the crown, people stopped to smile, or bow or nod his direction. He was put up on a pedestal for these people, although Eriol wasn't sure why.

Well, that's not true. He knew why. It was because of his mother, who was renowned for her innovation in the West. She was the one who suggested new ways to farm, how to equally distribute any wealth we could generate, and she always, always knew how to get them out of a crisis. Yet, in recent years she had taken a step back, only to push Eriol forward in her place.

The rebels' son.

That's what they called him. But it was not something that stirred up images of anarchy or vigilantism. No, he was seen as some sort of hope, a saviour. When the military came monthly to take large portions of what they had farmed, it was Eriol who found a way to con them and keep some for the villagers. When tensions between the West and South came to a head, Eriol was always part of the peace negotiation, despite being only twenty five.

Eriol took on these responsibilities partly because of his love for the people, but also because he had no choice. And considering he was so beloved, it came as a shock to him, that a surprise attack on the monarch happened. He was no fool though, he knew who was to blame for the attack. And things were going well, peaceful even, until _he_ came. Eriol never thought he would stir up so much trouble.

As he passed through the crowd, he spotted her. She was speaking to one of the council members with a look of concern on her face. She glanced up and made eye contact with him. He knew her mind was conjuring up a lie to tell him. She patted the man's shoulder and made her way over to him.

"You disappeared." She said almost too casually.

"What can I say. I was in shock." He said through gritted teeth.

He fell into step behind her. The two of them walking side by side caused many people to look on in admiration _. They will figure it all out_ , is what people thought. _They always know what to do. We're not desperate.'_

How wrong they were.

"So mother, were you ever going to tell me about the planned attack?" He said lowly. It was about keeping up appearances. People would feel unease if they knew that Eriol wasn't a part of the planned attack. He didn't want them to know about the inner rivalry.

"How could I?" She said sweetly as she waved at some children. "I only knew about it when it happened. I wasn't even there, remember? I was at home, taking care or Ruby."

Eriol's mother, who had a face so gentle and a voice and sweet, was far from the above. She leaned against him and walked slowly, exaggerating the limp she received years previous.

"I don't believe you." He said looking down at her.

She smiled sweetly and curled her arm around his. With a motherly pat to his arm she said. "Calm down now, Eriol. We don't want people to think there's tension here, do we? Not at a time like this."

"Well then I'll ask again, why didn't you-"

"Oh, Eriol don't you think I would have told you if I knew? I'm not so happy that you were left out, it doesn't send a great sign out to the people."

"Then who was responsible for it?"

"Oh, Eriol." She said and smiled up at him and narrowed his eyes. "You know very well who is responsible."

"Then he can be held accountable for the lives that were lost."

"Sacrifices have to be made, Eriol."

"They died in vain." He replied. "Nothing was achieved from this."

"Oh? Really? Five soldiers died isn't that an achievement." She asked genuinely.

He wanted to shake her and shout, _No! It's not! It's not worth the amount we lost!_ But he didn't, because his mother had made up her mind. There was no changing it. But an alternative…? He didn't know one. The villagers had lived under the injustice of the regime since he could remember. Although some became use to it, the youth wanted justice, and they would use violence to get that. Negotiations and talking wasn't getting them anywhere. His opinion swayed from violent to peaceful day by day. Like during the attack. The Princess was right there, he saw red. Looking at her in her crown and royal clothing while his people lived in rags and poverty.

Had the Princess come closer, he truly believed he would have killed her. As if it would have balanced out all the wrong with Tomoeda.

His mother was not always like this. Although she always considered the people, did everything for them, her methods to achieve justice for the West had turned bloodier.

"Anyway," She said. "I'm disappointed that you didn't think of it first. You're smarter than him, Eriol. If you were in charge-"

"Mother, you can't possibly condone what he did?"

Her face went stony for a second. "I don't condemn it. Things are changing Eriol, we have to move with them. The boy is sloppy, but he's passionate for our cause. Something you seem to be losing."

"I care about everyone in the West. Everything I do is for them, don't doubt me on that."

"Then prove it." She said and slid her arm free. "Because he's gathering support. And let me tell you, he's not wrong in everything he says."

Eriol began to protest but she slipped away and vanished with a group of older women. He turned around and knew why. Two military tanks rolled up onto the hill and grinded to a halt. Eriol groaned. He was a fool to think that they would not scourged every village in the west.

No wonder his mother disappeared. As far as the South were concerned, she died a long time ago and so was living incognito. It was the best kept secret in the West.

People were quick to back away from the tank and hushed murmurs of fear spread. A van crawled up behind the tanks and stopped. Eriol stepped in from of the crowd with his arms crossed. He'd have to deal with this. He heard the van door open and boots thud the ground. A green cap bobbed up and down as the soldier made their way around.

When Eriol saw the soldier, he groaned. Anyone but her.

Lieutenant Meiling stood in front of the tanks with a smirk on her face. The villagers held their children tighter, Meiling always had that effect on people. Her black hair was scraped back into a low bun. Her red eyes passing judgingly over everyone's face until it landed on Eriol's.

She curled her lip into a sneer.

She walked towards him.

"Mr. Hiiragizawa. Just the man I wanted to see."

Eriol clenched his jaw and nodded. "Lieutenant Li." He didn't bow. He would never bow to military.

"How can I help you?" He said stiffly, noting the villagers uneasy stares. Eriol prayed that _he_ wasn't here. The last thing they needed was a riot.

"Oh, I think maybe we should speak in private." She said in a low, entertained voice.

Eriol nodded and Meiling followed him into the wooden council hall. Eriol could only hear hushed whispers and the clinging of Meilings rifle against her belt.

He led her into a back room. One table two chairs on either side. The two of them entered while two guards stood outside the door. Meiling took a seat and lit up a cigarette, though Eriol knew this meeting was far from casual.

She puffed twice and glanced out the window at the villagers milling around.

"What do I owe the pleasure Lieutenant."

Meiling smirked and with one hand, she eased her cap off her head. Seven stiches protruded through the left side of her scalp. Eriol winced. Did she know? Did she know that it was Eriol who had smashed the rock into her head in order to save his friend?

"That's quite a nasty gash you have. Who gave you that?"

"I didn't see who. But I'll find out." She threatened and puffed her cigarette.

"You may have heard of an incident that happened at the Kings' assembly. Or perhaps, you were there yourself?"

"I was there. Took off before things got ugly." He said.

Meiling didn't push that issue further. She stared at Eriol with intrigued. He was older than her but had an aura beyond his years. Maybe that's why the village trusted him to speak for them.

"So, what are we going to do about these rebels?"

When she said 'we', he knew she meant him.

"I don't know of any rebels. I can't control what I don't know. There are countless villages in the West, why do you assume this one had anything to do with it?" He tried not to get defensive. The truth was, there were probably many villages involved, but he feared the origins of the violence came from his village. Eriol wouldn't rat him out though, he'd deal with that his own way.

"Look, Eriol," Meiling said as she squashed out her cigarette. "I am only speaking to you out of politeness. If I wanted to round up and have everyone in this village shot I can just give the command. I'm giving you a chance. Where are the rebels?"

Eriol wanted to sneer. This was just one incident. But with regards to the Tomoedan regime, everyone in the West was a rebel. Some were just more extreme than others.

"Like I told you, Lieutenant, I don't know anything. But you'll be the first to know."

Meiling clenched her jaw. "Fine, play it that way. We'll be seeing more of each other." She stood up and fixed her cap back on and left.

Meiling was a woman of her word. She most certainly would be back.

X

The tanks descended the hill and the community took a collective sigh of relief. Many cam to thank Eriol, or pat him on the back.

Eriol was about to leave when he heard _his_ laugh. Eriol clenched his fist when he saw him emerging out of the forest with four others behind him. Of course they retreated as soon as they heard the tanks. Now they were back, pretending to be heroes. Eriol's wanted to leave, he couldn't think of him right now. He needed to think of a way to appease Meiling. But his anger rooted him to his place.

The man walked head of the group. He was tall, arrogant, and self-righteous. Eriol knew that the attack on the king was only the beginning. He had more in store.

He was getting closer to Eriol and when they made eye contact, he smirked.

"Hiirigazawa-san." He said loud and casually, as if they were close allies.

Eriol kept his face stony. "Toya."

Toya narrowed his eyes and smiled. "We could have used you yesterday. We're always short on comrades." He said with a cocky grin.

Eriol breathed in, controlling himself. He would not get sucked in. Out of all the people who died in the attack, he wished Toya had been one of them. But he managed to escape somehow. Why did people follow him so blindly? Why were they so willingly to follow him into the bloodshed like yesterday? Were times that difficult?

Eriol didn't respond. As always, he remained silent.

Toya laughed light-heatedly, "Maybe next time? Eh?" He patted Eriol on the shoulders and continued to make his way to the only bar in the village.

When they disappeared Eriol made his way home. He sighed heavily. The villagers shouldn't be thanking Eriol, and certainly not Toya. He couldn't understand why so many people approved of the attack, shouldn't they know by now that there would be consequences? The South would never let this slide.

The next day, the consequences came.

The military vans came and took a large portion of this months food and materials, leaving the villages to ration out what was left. Meiling was going to squeeze them into giving her over the rebels. Who knows how long it would last.

As Eriol worked day and night to keep their heads above water, he thought time and time again of giving Toya up. Had Toya not already established himself as a dead man, maybe he would have given him up already.

X x x

 **Tomoyo's POV**

I can't take it anymore.

The walls are closing in. At least, that's what it feels like.

I didn't think this life of mine could get any more claustrophobic. But then the attack happened. My mother, who normally would allow me to roam the castle speaking aloud my 'crazy' thoughts, had decided I needed to take my princess title seriously. With my fathers life being threatened, I need to be prepared to take his place, should the worst happen.

I woke up at 6:00a.m. every day. I had social events, long conversations about nothing with woman twice my age and men who have never smiled in their life. I must be silent, says my mother. Speak when spoken to. It never ended.

Come drink tea with the Sargent and his wife. Walk through the palace gardens the ladies lunch group. Sit for a portrait, sit for another portrait, study, practice piano, study, more social events. It never ended.

The worst of it….it happened behind my veil.

Yes, outside my bedroom I must wear this purple fucking veil. It's a part of me now. Even when I'm not wearing it I still see everything with a purple tint. Only few people know my face, only my voice. But it's not my true voice, it's what they want to hear. I can tell when they look at me, their wondering, _Is she ugly? Is she pretty? Is it true that she has a wart on her chin? I wonder if she has her father's fat nose, or her mother's thin lips._

They talk to the veil, not to me. And honestly, that's fine with me.

And then, when I was at one of the many forced social events, they tore through my room and found every ounce of the drugs that keep me going through the motions. The withdrawals were the hardest. It had been a long time since I was one hundred per cent in my own mind. It was torture.

I could have protested, but there was no point. My mother was determined to make me a carbon copy of her, no matter how much I rebelled.

Am I breaking? Has she broken me? Am I losing my spirit? Did I even have any spirit to begin with, or was that an illusion? Either way, I'm done for, destined not to stray far from the path of my parents. The voice inside me that called for rebellion was fading away into the abyss, and with it, Tomoyo Daidouji.

And just when I think I am truly lost. He comes to my mind.

The man from the West. He comes to my thoughts and he reaches down into the abyss and calls back my fighting spirit.

Then I remember that I am not lost, I am just misplaced. Yes, misplaced. There is still a chance that somewhere out there in Tomoeda, I can be me. I can feel myself coming back, and behind the veil I am planning my escape.

But they're not making it easy. The soldiers are not so easily seduced anymore. In fact, the attack has prompted more security to take care of me. They are stricter with me. They ignore my commands. I officially have o voice anymore. Escape seems so impossible. But I have to get out. I can't stay and breath the recycled air in the castle.

My breaking point comes three weeks after the attack.

It was the first day where I had no events scheduled in the evening. Deciding that the castle would be too stuffy on such a hot day, I went for a walk around the palace gardens. As I veered off towards the gardens, I heard soldier's boots follow me. There were two of them about six feet behind me.

"That'll be all." I said dismissing them. But they still followed.

"I said that'll be all. Go away." I snapped through my veil.

Still, they followed.

"Leave me alone!" I barked. But they didn't move away.

"We're ordered to keep you secure Princess Daidouji, we can't leave your side outside the palace."

"It's my garden. I want to be alone. I'm ordering you to go!"

"We take orders from the King and Queen, Princess. We can't leave your side outside the palace." The soldier said repeating himself.

I felt my breathing go shallow. I needed to be alone. Alone. Free. I couldn't breathe. I began to lift the veil to breath the fresh air.

"Princess, please don't remove your veil outside the palace walls."

My hand froze, then shook with pending frustration.

"This is my home. You don't tell me what to do." I said and stalked off. I struggled to loosen the veil.

"Princess, do not remove you veil outside the palace walls!" He said with more urgency.

"Or what?" I spat.

"If the princess should remove her veil, then we will be forced to restrain the princess."

Restrain me. That's what they said. Are these the lengths my mother will go to keep me in my place? I let the veil drop over my hand.

"I…can't do this…..anymore." I whispered. My voice broke, as did my spirit.

I won't stay like this for another day, another second even. I don't know why I began to frantically look around for an escape. A door, a gate, ANYTHING! I couldn't be here, conscious for another second It just had to stop!

The soldiers sensed my panic and began to march towards me. What would they do? Restrain me? Take me back to my mother? Lock me in my room? No, they won't get me. I'll escape before they get to me.

That's when the best…and worst idea of my life hatched. And before I was even able to think it through, my feet started walking owards it slowly before they burst into a run.

By the time the soldiers realized what I was doing, it was too late to stop me.

The last sound I heard before I shut my eyes was the cracking sound of my skull against the stone wall of the palace.

X x x


	6. Stage 1: Infiltration

_Passage from Nathala B. Omerson's Diary_

 _The Tomedan regime is only as strong as its weakest secret-keeper._

 _Where do all the secrets live? In the South, of course. The origins of Tomeda's lies is in 'Base', the military's epicentre. Get in there and you'll see for yourself. But tread carefully, the soldiers are trained to stomp out the truth._

 _I hope you're a good liar. If not, it'll cost you your life._

X x x

Meiling winced as the nurse dapped her head with anti-septic.

A nasty gash glowed on the right side of her head. Thankfully she only received a minor concussion and seven stitches. The nurses said it could have been much worse. The longer they kept her in, the more agitated she became. She was eager to return to her office to scheme and plan her retaliation.

She hissed under the sting of the anti-septic.

Syaoran leaned quietly against the wall of the nurses office watching her. He knew this was killing her. Meiling hated to fail, especially when this assignment was so important. She didn't even hear the worst of the news, that the Princess was almost captured too. He decided he'd keep that to himself.

"Any reports back?" She asked him, hoping for a ray of good news.

Syaoran shook his head. "Only what you already know. We still don't know how rebels got into the staging area, unless-"

"Unless the westerners were covering for them, helping to smuggle them in." Meiling spat with fury. "Well, wherever they're hiding, I'll find them. I don't care how many of them I have to go through-"

"Meiling." Syaoran said calmly. "Maybe instead of immediate retaliation, you should withdraw back a little. They lost some of their own too. If we push them, it may only help them in recruiting more extremists."

Meiling clenched her jaw. The nurse finished and left them alone.

"It seems they're already recruiting at a quick pace. I can't sit back and do nothing while they increase their numbers, not under my watch. Besides, can you imagine what would happen if people outside the West would say if even a whiff of what happened today got out?"

"The media handled it well already, no one but the soldiers and some of the monarch know about it. And we both know they're not going to say anything."

Syaoran said nothing more. For he knew that Meiling had already thought out a way to exact revenge. Meiling put Utopia before anything else. She didn't care who she'd have to go through in order to keep her idea of peace.

"Did you see who attacked you?" He asked.

She shook her head and glanced in the mirror, wincing at the sight of her gash. "No, but I'll find out who. And they will be sorry." She concealed the wound underneath her cap.

"You really think this whole 'rebel rising' thing is a threat?"

"Not if I'm in charge. All I have to do is weed out their ring leader. By the way, how's your side of thing going? Find anything on the Kinomoto girl?"

Syaoran looked down and shook his head. "No. We're monitoring her but so far nothing out of the ordinary. Only a few visits from an ex and a friend. Honestly, I don't think she's hiding anything."

"Yet." Meiling mumbled.

X x x

As Syaoran walked back to his office, he thought of the shit storm that would ascend to the Base after the attack on the King yesterday. Tensions were heightened and only made worse by the oncoming 'Utopia Day.' He was also under a lot of pressure with various assignments, including that of keeping an eye on Sakura Kinomoto, a task which seemed to be going nowhere.

"Lieutenant Li, you have a visitor in your office.

"Did they make an appointment?" Syaoran asked in surprise. He wasn't expecting anyone today.

"No, Lieutenant, we tried to have her escorted off the premises but she was quite insistent that you were expecting her. She even had one of your business cards."

"She?"

"Yes sir, she's in the waiting room. I can have security come up and deal with it-"

"No, it's fine." He said and walked towards the waiting room. Syaoran wondered if maybe one of his sisters had stopped by, or maybe it was a transferee. The person he absolutely did not expect to be waiting for him was Sakura Kinomoto.

When he came in she was eyeing up a picture of the first soldiers who served under the Tomoedan regime. He couldn't tell if she was turning her lip up in disgust or intrigue. She wore a cream blouse accompanied with a green skirt. The early summer had been abnormally hot.

When she seen him she blinked and bowed lower than she had before. "Lieutenant Li."

Syaoran's thoughts momentarily stalled. She looked more feminine then last time, but her face remained poker faced.

"Ms Kinomoto. How can I help you?" He said in an even voice, noticing the receptionist behind her eyeing Sakura up with a slight snarl. There was an aura around Sakura that made it obvious that she wasn't from the South.

Sakura opened her mouth to speak but snapped it shut and raised her eyebrow at the receptionist.

"I was hoping to have a word with you. In private."

Syaoran nodded and led her to his office.

She stood there awkwardly in the middle of his office, suddenly unsure of what she was doing. She never been to the South before. She'd been to the North once, on a school trip. The South is somewhere an Easterner didn't want to end up unless they deliberately married into it. It usually meant you were up for transfer, or your motives towards Utopia were being questioned. Either way, Sakura began to regret coming here. She was on the Lieutenant's turf now. Surrounded by cameras, soldiers and somewhere behind on of the brass doors, the General sat and planned his next moves. Sakura doubted her ability to pull her plan off.

"Ms Kinomoto, would you like to sit?" Syaoran inclined to the chair across from him.

Sakura hesitated before taking the seat. She felt small sitting opposite to the Lieutenant. He wasn't in full uniform. Due to the hot weather, he was wearing a light green shirt with dark green trousers. His cap sat at the corner of the desk.

"You said if I needed a job, I could contact you." She said, trying to make it sound light, but failed.

Syaoran smiled and relaxed his shoulders. He had feared she had been on to him. "Well, if that's all, a simple phone call would have been fine."

"I know. I wanted to make it more….personal." She said and bit her lip. Why did she use that word? "And also to apologize about my behaviour the last time we met. I didn't mean to accuse you of anything. I was still in shock about what happened and….I apologize."

Syaoran smiled and nodded. "I understand."

Syaoran was happy that she came personally. It was a sign of trust. Which would eventually make his job a lot easier. Sakura relaxed. She didn't think it'd be so easy. It made her job a lot easier.

"What sort of a job are you looking for?" He asked.

She slid he CV over to him. He picked it up and scanned it, pretending like he didn't already know her resume off by heart.

"Whatever you think is best. Although maybe something in the library section….or maybe…the media." She tried to keep her voice even as she said _'_ _media'._ Syaoran glanced up at her from the CV. He waited to see if she'd correct herself. She didn't.

"You want to work in the media?" He questioned and snapped her CV shut.

Sakura cursed herself. She dived too deep and aroused his suspicion. Suddenly the soft charm on his face disappeared and he smiled a tight smile that never reached his eyes.

"Why the media?"

Sakura placed one hand on the other to stop them from shaking. He heartbeat started to rise.

"To be honest, Lieutenant. I've been trying so hard to escape the stigma of my family. It's not easy. But if you give me this opportunity, I'll prove that I'm different from them. I just want to show that I'm playing my part in Utopia and maybe then, I won't have to be ashamed of my family name."

It was the hardest thing Sakura ever had to say. She thought the Lieutenant would see straight through that.

He did. He didn't believe that her attitude could change so suddenly, that she'd drop the resilience he liked so much about her. But after a minutes silence, he looked down and nodded slowly. "There is an opening position for the archives, Big job but no one has signed up for it. It would look good for us to have someone from the East working on that. As for the media…"

Sakura held her breath. "I'll see what I can do. But don't get your hopes up."

Sakura let out a sigh of relief and for the first time in a while, she smiled a genuine smile. Syaoran saw a glance of her white teeth behind her plump lip and let his heart stop for a bit to take it in. That smile was enough to turn his rotten day around. He wondered if he could make her smile like that again, because it lit up her whole face. But surely enough as soon as it came, it was gone again and her face returned to its smooth but stony expression. He wondered if he seen it at all.

"Thank you Lieutenant Li." Sakura got up to leave.

"Hold up." He said and produced a small file.

He handed it to her and she raised an eyebrow. "What is this?"

"It's you timetable sheets. You'll report to me every morning when you sign in and when you sign out."

"You're my boss?" She asked.

He nodded. "You'll be given a rail pass to enter 'BASE' and I will escort you as far as the East station after work."

"That's not necessary. I can take care of myself."

"I'm sure you can. It's just precautionary. If something happened to you while working for BASE, it's would cause a stir. Unless you have a problem with that?"

Sakura had no choice but to accept the conditions. It would be harder to infiltrate BASE with the Lieutenant watching her moves. But she'd made it this far. She could figure out the rest later.

X x x

"You're what!?"

Fujitaka put down his book and looked at his daughter with surprise.

Sakura kept her head down and pretended not to register her father's disbelief. As she stirred her tea she replied; "I got offered a job at Base and I start tomorrow. It's above minimum wage and it's enough for me to help around more here-"

"I don't care about the money, Sakura. Why on earth did you accept a job in the South? Of all places!"

"Like I said, dad. I'm unemployed, I need money. I need experience."

"And the General's son, he- he just handed you that job? Just like that?"

Sakura tensed. "It was competitive dad. I had to fight for this job. Aren't you always saying I need to be passionate for something."

"Yes, but Sakura… You know how they feel about…" Fujitaka trailed off and Sakura side-glanced him, daring to finish.

"…Easterners."

"You mean, how they feel about us? About our family."

Fujitaka did not reply. Worry spread across his face. He sighed, for he did not know what was going on in his daughter's mind. He never did. As the years went by, she became angrier, more complex. So different to the child she was. He wondered if he'd failed her. Was her negativity towards the world as result of her upbringing? It worried him. But her strength reassured him. He had to trust that she knew what she was doing.

"Is there something I should know dad? Something you want to get off your chest?" She turned to face him now. Her face was soft, begging him to release whatever it was that weighed on him for so many years, since the takeover.

Fujitaka tried to smile, make light of the situation. It's what he always did. "Of course not, Sakura. I'm just worried about you, that's all. What's wrong with staying local? There are other libraries here that want help."

By the time he finished speaking Sakura already turned her back on him. She loved her father, she truly did. But he wasn't honest with her. There were things he kept from her. Things about himself, her brother, the takeover, things about her even. But she couldn't recall such memories easily. She was only a child then. If he wouldn't share with her, she wouldn't share with him.

"Sakura, maybe a job isn't right for you right now. Considering everything that happened at 'Happy Books', you need a break."

 _That's the last thing I need._ Sakura thought to herself. Since she came across Nathala's diary, a passion burned deep inside her.

"Dad, I'll be fine. I have a good feeling about this." She smiled.

Fujitaka was going to fight her more on it but if he knew one thing, it was that when Sakura made her mind up about something, she would stick to it. He decided to back off, for now.

"Yukito called today, he asked for you." He said and repressed a sigh. "That boy is persistent." Yukito was not a bad guy, but like Sakura, Fujitaka grew tired of his attempts to woo her. Plus, any man so desperate to take his daughter away from him was never going to go down well in Fujitaka's books.

Sakura drained the last of her tea. Yes, Yukito had made his concerns for her painfully obvious. But she was sure, like last time, he'd get tired of rejection and leave her alone.

Besides, how much harm could he really do?

"I'm going to visit Toya's grave and buy groceries." She said and planted a kiss on his head.

They had their disagreements from time to time, but she adored her father, and he her. And that love to protect his daughter is what prompted him to do what he did next.

The phone rang twice before a woman answered it.

"Hello? Yes, it's Fujitaka, I need to speak with General Li… It's urgent…"

X x x

If Sakura thought the organization of 'Happy Books' was a hot mess, she was in for a surprise.

She stared wide eyed at the enormous clutter of books, pages, filer etc. They were accompanied by rows and rows and rows of half empty book shelves they went on so far, she had to squint to see the back wall of the library. It was dark and dingy with a damp smell.

"Yeah, it's a bit of a mess." Syaoran said from behind her.

Sakura nodded. "Why is it like this? I imagined that everything at Base would be….well…."

"Not a clusterfuck like this?" Syaoran said and himself scanned the huge room.

"Yeah. But, I mean, how?"

"This is where Tomoeda stores important public documents, books, files, you name it. When this place was first built, it was supposed to be the epicentre of knowledge. But with the regime trying to establish itself, this project got abandoned."

"But doesn't anyone ever go here?"

"Only a few." He murmured. "For now this place is a private library. But it may surprise you to know that the soldiers here aren't too keen on picking up a book on their free time."

Sakura sensed some humour in his voice. She glanced over her shoulder to see he was leaning against a banister and flicking through a dust covered book.

"What do you think? Are you up for it? You're the only one who applied who actually has experience in this field."

Sakura began to roll up her sleeves and nodded.

"I'll send in a few assistants to help you-"

"That won't be necessary." She said as she grazed the shelves with her finger. "I work alone or not at all."

Syaoran raised an eyebrow. "It would be impossible for you to reach the deadline in time if you worked alone."

"If I don't reach target progress by the end of the month then you can send in help." She said, her mind already on other thought.

Syaoran went to protest, to remind her of who was boss and who she took orders from, but he paused and decided against it. By now she walked in a trace, gliding her finger over the spine of books. As Syaoran watched her he felt conflicted. Was it a bad idea to give her this job? He didn't consult his father first like he should have. Just like he didn't consult his father about not relocating her.

That was twice now, that Syaoran had gone against what his father would have wanted. Twice that she had made him doubt his father, his status as a lieutenant. It spelled trouble. Yet when he looked at the softness of her hair, the gentle curves on her thin frame and the innocence of her small face he began to doubt again. She couldn't be like the rest of her family. No, maybe she was misunderstood.

He wanted to understand her.

"Can I open the curtains?" She called from the other side of the room.

"Yes." He replied.

She drew back one of the heavy red curtains and the summer light flooded into the room. Sakura winced at the sudden brightness but when her eyes adjusted, she stood in shock.

Through the window, was a view she didn't understand. She felt Syaoran walking up behind her. She turned to him with a puzzled look on her face.

"Good view, isn't it?"

Sakura nodded. "Yes but….what am I looking at?"

Syaoran secretly smiled. The look of wonder and puzzlement on her face was bizarrely childlike. She wasn't in the East anymore.

"The library at Base sits on the border of every wall." He explained.

"You mean…?"

"Yeah. This is all of Tomoeda. Behind us is the South, as you know. Over there," He pointed over her shoulder. "Is the East."

Sakura's mouth fell into a small'o'. She recognised the flat plains of the East. Where everything was so square and organized. From this view, it looked like a perfectly square grid.

"Straight ahead." Syaoran continued. "Is the North. You can see the castle in the distance if you squint hard enough." Sakura did indeed see it. There were more lights in the North, and more colours. The pattern wasn't s strict and she thought the streets seemed wider.

Sakura pressed her hands against the glass and looked left.

"Is that…the West?" She asked, already knowing the answer.

Syaoran clenched his jaw. "Yes." He said. He would not say anymore. Soldiers were forbidden to speak about the west with outsiders.

Sakura thankfully didn't ask any questions about it. She just looked. It was the only section of Tomoeda where she couldn't see the end. The West was rocky with a mixture of terrain. It had hills and mountains that bobbed up and down before disappearing behind fog, despite the sunny weather. There was a certain beauty to it.

"You said the library was private _for now_ …"

"Yeah, when you're finished here, it'll become public to every side of Tomoeda via a communal entrance."

Sakura didn't know how to feel about that. The possibility of everyone being able to come together in one place.

"I'll let you get started." He said and backed away. "I'll be back to check up on you."

Sakura thought she had it all worked out. She had managed to infiltrate the South, not just the South, but Base. She never imagined she'd make it this far. Stage two was not to clear at the moment, but for now she jotted down everything she seen or heard into a small black diary that she hid in an interior pocket.

The soldiers worked on rotation every day. The place was crawling with them. Some gave her awkward glances, indicating the was an outsider but they never asked who she was. Some soldiers approached her on her lunch breaks. Sakura gave them short answers which intrigued some, infuriated others. When they asked who she was she'd simply answer 'The Librarian.' Which seemed to annoy them.

She'd stare out the window of the library and note the white vans that came in and out of the West. What were they for? Did they transport things or people? Why is so much of the base shut off, even from soldiers? And _why,_ was Lieutenant Li always hovering around her in the most inconvenient of times?

She felt like he was always around, observing her, asking question, prodding. It was infuriating. How could she sneak off to examine the Base when he seemed to know exactly when she would leave? Not to mention when he'd accompany her home and take the train with her. She didn't like being escorted, but it was a part of the deal.

The questions weren't too personal, just everyday questions…at first. Then when he casually asked about Toya, Sakura had enough.

"Lieutenant Li?" She asked and crossed her arms. She had been working hard to get the first phase of work done but he had interrupted her with his infuriating questions. "Have I done something wrong?"

Syaoran furrowed his brow. "No, Ms. Kinomoto, why do you ask?"

"Because you keep prodding me with strange questions, which is disturbing my work flow. If I haven't done anything wrong, then please let me continue in peace."

Syaoran didn't know how to reply. He cursed himself. For the past two weeks, he had been trying to gain her trust. It worked before with women, who were only too delighted to hold the attention of Lieutenant Li. After an hour, they'd spill everything. But Sakura Kinomoto remained tight-lipped and if anything, withdrew more from him.

He couldn't arouse her suspicion. But he couldn't let her stray too far.

Then, on the last day of week two, something strange happened. She had almost finished a large section of filing. Tired from trying to break her, Syaoran sat down to help her, something that annoyed her but she said nothing. He was good at filing. Twice their pinkie fingers clashed, sending a confusing flutter and small blush to her neck.

After twenty minutes, Syaoran rose to stretch and not guessing the height of the shelf behind him. He whacked his head off it. The knock sent two books from a higher shelf falling, each taking their turn to bounce on his head.

"Shit." He hissed.

Sakura, who witnessed this, froze mid-action. After a second, her blank face involuntarily broke out in laughter.

Syaoran looked over at her shocked. He never heard her laugh before, and it filled the room. He could have sworn the room got a fraction brighter. She tried to control her laughter but that only made it worse and she held her sides.

Syaoran too, broke into a smile to see Sakura, who was so serious and mysterious in all aspects, laugh about something so slapstick.

After a minute she relaxed, a little giggle escaping every now and again.

"I better finish." She said and gathered the remaining files.

He asked her to sign some files. She rolled her eyes and said. "Sakura. You can call me Sakura. No one ever calls me 'Ms. Kinomoto.'"

Syaoran was surprised but delighted. First name basis, he was breaking her guard down. Stage one in gaining her trust. He wanted to tell her to call him Syaoran, but he was afraid to push it.

The journey home was filled with light conversation, it was enjoyable for Syaoran.

But the next day, her face returned to its normal blank expression, and her guard was up higher than before.

He was going to break down her guard. Gaining her trust was becoming top of his agenda. The only question was, was he doing it for work, or because he wouldn't get the sound of her laughter out of his head at night?

X x x

The monitor beeped in even pulses. She was stable.

Tomoyo groaned. The throbbing in her head was fiercely intense. She raised her hand to touch the bump on her head but her hand was caught.

"Patient is awake." She heard someone near her say.

Tomoyo pried her eyes open. Her vision was blurry.

"Can you hear me?" Said the woman near her. Her voice nasally and sharp.

"Uh…." Tomoyo tried to form words. "Y…yesss…" She slurred. "Where am I?"

"Patient's vitals are normal. Will keep her in bed overnight for observation of brain damage."

"B-brain da…damage?"

Tomoyo's vision was coming together. She saw white sheets. She was in a bed. But not her bed. This bed was thin and flimsy, and the sheets were like sandpaper. Her head throbbed. She looked down. She was handcuffed to the metal barrier on both sides of the bed.

"Where…am...I?" She asked.

The women, who she realized must have been a nurse, didn't respond. When Tomoyo asked her again, she ignored her and continued to scribble notes down.

"Answer….me…." Tomoyo said, trying to muster up anger. "You can't…ignore me. Do you….know….who I….am? I'm the Prin-"

"You're patient 1245390." She answered not looking at her.

Tomoyo squinted but before she could ask again, the nurse interrupted. "You have a visitor. 5 minutes only." She left before Tomoyo could stop her.

A woman entered. It took Tomoyo a while minute to realize that this woman in plain clothes, was her mother. She had never seen her dress so simply. Why was she dressed like that? Why was Tomoyo here? In a hospital. Then she remembered the last seconds before she ran head first into the wall, that explains her headache.

Queen Daidouji smiled and placed a hand on Tomoyo's cuffed one. Her kind face became strained and the Queen clamped her hand down and dug her nails into Tomoyo's skin. In a flash her face came inches from Tomoyo's.

"Did you enjoy your little stunt, did you? Well, I hope it was worth it."

"Wha-"

"You don't want to be the Princess? Fine. Sick of your privileged life? Fine. Want to act like a crazy person? Fine. Enjoy your new life." She rasped in a low whisper.

"M-mother I don't understand. What's happening?"

"I gave up, that's what happened. You're on your own now Tomoyo. What you've always wanted, right? To be as far away from your responsibilities as possible. Well, you've got it." With that, Queen Daidouji stood up and dusted herself.

"You mean…" Tomoyo mumbled. "I don't have to live in the palace? I can leave? Move somewhere else?" Hope was breathing itself inside Tomoyo. Suddenly, running into a wall didn't seem like such a stupid idea.

Queen Daidouji let out a high-pitched laugh. "Oh, Tomoyo. Where do you think you are? A hotel?"

Tomoyo suddenly became aware of the other voices, the shrieks and cries and the banging. She wasn't in a hospital, she was in the Tomedan mental asylum.

"M-mother…"

"You're always saying how I don't understand you. So I thought, well, maybe she should be around people who understand her more then. So enjoy. Oh, and one more thing." She leaned in close to Tomoyo's petrified face. "I wouldn't go bragging about being a Princess here, last I heard, the western patients here aren't a fan of the monarch. So I'd keep that to myself if I were you." The Queen smirk dropped and she took one last look at her daughter, her bruising face, her wide crazy eyes and then turned from her and left.

Tomoyo's hands shook as her mother disappeared around the curtain. Amongst the cluster of awful shrieks and cries, of the other patients, Tomoyo couldn't hear her mother begin to sob, out of sight.

X x x

 **Thank you for reading :)**

 **Will post more soon.**


	7. Friction

**One of my longer chapters,**

 **Enjoy.**

X x x

Sakura had worked relentlessly to meet the month's deadline. She was exhausted and her arms ached in pain from moving files and boxes from one place to another. The documents used English phrasing that went beyond her understanding and once, on the point of exhaustion, she embarrassingly asked Syaoran to remind her what the word _'_ _council'_ meant. (Something Syaoran found amusing, if not adorable.)

She had no choice but to give in and ask for an assistant. It was not because the workload was _too_ much for her, but because the job was taking up _all_ her time of which none of it was being dedicated to her actual mission, which was spying. A whole month had passed and all she could find out was that in the South they could afford the luxury of fine leather bound books. Not exactly enough of an outrage or evidence to inspire a revolution. She did notice that none of the books or files she handled dated pre-takeover. She knew it was done deliberately If she was going to find out something, she needed to leave the library.

So she caved in and accepted a chirpy assistant by the name of Suzanna who liked to talk about the different type of fish found in Marble river. Sakura didn't respond to her rambles, nor did she stop her because a) she was a good assistant and b) she didn't mind her chatter amongst the deathly silence of the library.

It was a particularly hot day and Suzanna had gone home early for a reason that Sakura didn't want explained. It had something to do with fish. Sakura stopped to admire the view out of the large open windows. It was breath-taking to be able to see Tomoeda from this high up. Her ear tweaked as she heard voices coming from below. She pressed her hand against the window and looked straight down. Below the library was a training field. Soldiers were doing marching drills there every few days and she could feel the sound of their collective boots marching in time. Sakura squinted and noticed that most of them had young faces, younger than her. Perhaps they were sixteen, younger even. It disturbed Sakura to see them with guns attached to their waist.

They all stood in perfect rows with poker straight postures, their faces serious. Sakura wondered how such young people could work so had under the relentless summer heat. She was about to back away again before she heard a voice shouting over the yard. She squinted to confirm her suspicions and yes, it was Lieutenant Li. Sakura could make out the strong outline of his jaw and his clean cut brown locks under his cap. He marched out in front of them, barking commands that were muffled to Sakura. Every syllable he shouted send a small wave of anger inside her. They were just kids.

Syaoran walked up to one girl with dirt blond hair. He looked down at her and began again a string words in a loud angered voice. The girl did not move, she kept her eyes forwards. Syaoran was tense, she thought he was a second away from striking her.

The girl seemed to respond with a 'Yes sir' but it sounded so meek compared to Syaoran. Syaoran lifted his head and said something to the rest. The rest saluted and dispersed in an orderly fashion but the young girl remained in front of Syaoran. He stared at her with a clenched jaw. Sakura held her breath, would he really hit her? Shout at her again?

When the very last of the privates left the course, there was a standoff between the two of them. Then, suddenly the girl broke out into a laugh. Syaoran, a second later did the same. Sakura was confused. They laughed together before Syaoran pushed his cap from his head and ruffled up his hair. The girl was now talking with wide, youthful eyes. She was bouncing from one foot to another and twirling her gun in her hand like a baton and pretending to shoot sideways like they did in the movies. As she was talking she seemed to be recalling a story. Syaoran must have found it funny because he laughed and patted her on the shoulder and said something back. They began to casually walk away, the girl jumping by his side and making bizarre hand movements.

A small smile crept onto Sakura's face. She had never seen Syaoran so relaxed. She tilted her head to the side and studied him and the way he interacted with her. He was so human, you wouldn't think he was the son of the General.

"Enjoying your work?" Came a voice from behind her.

The temperature seemed to suddenly drop from the room. The hairs stood on the back of her neck. She slowly turned around to confirm who she knew the voice belonged to.

Every time she seen him, he seemed to be taller, more intimidating. Or was it that her spine shrunk under his cloudy grey eyes?

Sakura swallowed. "General Li." She bowed.

How long had he been standing there? Observing her? He stood out of the sunlight with a small grin hidden beneath his silver moustache but Sakura knew he was far from the light-hearted grandfather he pretends to be.

The General stepped forward and looked out onto the training fields. Syaoran had just disappeared from view.

"We're very lucky to have him." The General said with a slight nod to himself. Sakura also looked out at the view. She then risked a side glance at him. In his face, she could make out Syaoran's jaw, his nose. But their eyes were different.

The General continued. "He's an inspiration to future soldiers."

Sakura's stomach dropped. She began to regret her small feelings of admiration for him. But, it made it easier to see Syaoran as what he was. A soldier. A Colonel Lieutenant assisting in training the future oppressors of justice.

Yes, Sakura would think of him like that. That way, Sakura could squash the very confusing butterfly in her stomach.

"How is your father?" The General asked casually.

Sakura swallowed and thought of the correct thing to say. This was no casual conversation, she could not give herself away. She must stay keep up for rues of being a good Tomoedan. She can't lose this job.

"He's in good health. He's started gardening again." She lied.

The General nodded. His presence was numbing. He was as tall as Syaoran and Sakura was quite short. The General had his hands clasped behind his back as he looked down on Tomoeda.

"I'm impressed with you." Said the General, which made Sakura's breath catch.

"General?"

"I didn't think you'd stick out such a difficult job. I admit I questioned your motives, but Lieutenant Colonel Li has assured me of your good intentions towards Utopia."

"Thank you General." Sakura said with unease. Had Syaoran really believed that? Did he lie for her…again?

"And of course, giving how this week must be difficult for you, I'm surprised you didn't request leave. It's your brother's anniversary if I'm not mistaken?"

Sakura's chocked but restrained to show how that comment got to her. Her hands began to shake as did her knees.

"Such a shame to lose someone so close so young. But keep up that fighting spirit. That what Tomoeda need." The General said casually as he continued to admire the view, not looking at Sakura.

Sakura's stomach dropped as her thoughts fled to her deceased brother.

The General dusted his leather gloved hands off each other and clapped them once harshly.

"Look at me, distracting you from work. Don't let me disturb you anymore." He said cheerfully and retreated into the shadows and out of the library. Sakura was in a state of shock. She stepped backwards and leaned against the bookshelf. She pressed her back against it and slid down slowly with trembling hands.

"Bastard." She whispered quietly because she still too shocked to cream.

The General knew exactly what he was doing. Was that a subtle warning? Was he expressing his suspicions? Sakura buried her head into her hands and let out a pained moan. She tried to push back the memories of Toya, of the day he didn't come home, of the argument he and her father had that night, of the night her father stood by the window waiting to see his red bike pull up outside, of the of the night she first heard the words 'dissident', of the night she found out her brother wouldn't be coming back.

She failed to supress those memories. They always came back in little painful fragments. There was no body, the Marble river swallowed it up. And if there was, it would have been imbedded with bullets.

The military killed her brother.

She thought it killed Kero Jones too. But that was proved otherwise.

The conversation with the General played on Sakura's mind for the rest of the day. She felt it weigh on her shoulders until a sickly feeling constricted her chest. Floods of memories she thought she kept at a distance came rushing back.

In the midst of her thoughts she heard boots making their way into the library. Was the General coming back? Did he have more to say to her?

Syaoran's face appeared around one of the large book shelves.

"Evening." He said a little too chirpy for Sakura's liking.

Sakura looked back and nodded, saying nothing more. Syaoran rolled up his sleeves oblivious to Sakura's mood.

Syaoran was in a good mood. "I won't be able to bring you home this evening I'm tied up here." He lied.

The truth was he had the following morning off and was planning to hang out with some of the other soldiers that evening at a popular bar outside of Base. This meant a night of heavy drinking and loosening up. Something Syaoran rarely got to do.

Sakura tensed as anger twitched in her face. _'_ _You don't_ _ **bring**_ _me anywhere.'_ She thought. He didn't own her. She didn't need him near her. She wanted to say this, but she was still shaking from earlier and was afraid her anger may be misplaced. She kept her mouth shut.

Syaoran found it odd that she didn't reply with a witty remark. He didn't pry into it. Maybe she was just tired, she had been working non-stop lately.

"You'll need to send in your papers next week so that Base can formally register your work permit here." He said.

"Ok." She replied but didn't turn around.

"You can sign out now. You've done enough for today." He said trying to be sympathetic.

Sakura turned around to sign the papers in his hands. Though she was trying to hide it, her face was sunken in sadness that Syaoran couldn't not notice. Even her face was drained of colour. She took the pen from his hands and signed her name with shaky fingers. Syaoran could barely make out her scrawly signature.

"Hey." He said and lightly took her trembling hand. "Are you ok?"

Sakura looked up at him. Her eyes were bigger than ever. Syaoran's concern grew and he wondered if she was going to cry. He had never seen to her so…vulnerable? Lost?

He asked her again but Sakura's mind was going cloudy and her hearing muffled. Suddenly her knowledge of English failed her. What was he saying? She couldn't understand. She couldn't make out his sounds, those strange syllables that fell from his moving lips. Syaoran's hand moved from hers and landed on her shoulder. He was aware of how close they were and could see his own reflection in her big green eyes.

Then, Sakura blinked and snapped back to reality.

"I'm fine!" She snapped angrily and whirled around out of his grasp.

Syaoran was stunned for a second and went to ask her again before she interrupted.

"I just don't need you breathing down my neck every second of the damn day! Can't you just leave me be!?"

Her eyes, which a second ago were begging for comfort now narrowed.

"Hey, don't forget who employs you here." He said in low anger. His patience with her was wearing off.

"And what? You own me now? Is that how it really works in the South? You, the military own everything? Will you haul me into interrogation next? Exile me to the West where who knows what happens?"

"Be careful of what you say next." He cautioned with balled fists. She was going towards forbidden territory.

"Why? Am I too close to finding out one of the dirty little secrets you keep here? Or maybe out there!" She yelled pointing a finger to the training field. "Where you train kids to kill people on my side of the wall! My people!"

She had lost it by this stage, her face burned with every word she spoke as a little voice in her head screamed _'_ _No, no, no, stop it!"_

When she finished, she was shaking but she didn't know if it were fear or anger.

Syaoran face was stony, unreadable. His eyes narrowed and for a moment he reminded her of the General. Were they the same? Was she duped into believing that maybe he was different, maybe he saw past the walls the people of Tomoeda lived in. But no. He was a soldier first, human second.

After a minute Syaoran said in a controlled voice; "You're fired. Take your stuff and leave your key card at reception."

He turned and left before he could see her reaction.

X x x

Sakura's train didn't leave for another hour and a half, something Lieutenant Li didn't think about before he fired her.

She spent the next while replaying her outburst in her head over and over again. Her temper had gotten the better of her. What was worse, was that as she was shouting those incriminating words they were not for Syaoran, but for the General. She had technically gone against the government when she questioned the regime and the South. She'd pay with it with certain exile into the West.

How could she have let the General get to her like that? She had a chance to actually do some good and in the end, she lost it all.

She needed air and considering she no longer had to be confined to the library, she handed her key card back to Marie at reception and wandered outside to the training fields. There was a dead heat even in the evening sun. The sand on the training field whipped lazily around her feet. Sakura was surprised no one was guarding here.

What was she to do now?

"Hey!" She heard a voice from behind her.

Sakura turned around and saw that blond girl trotting up to her. Sakura looked around to see if she was looking for someone else. But Sakura was the only other person. The girl jogged over to her with a wide smile as if Sakura was an old friend she hadn't seen in a while.

The girl huffed and put her hands on her knees. She waved at Sakura as if to say 'hold on a sec.' She was wearing a grey vest top which was drenched in sweat and khaki trousers. She wiped some dirt off her face and said, "Aren't you that girl from the East?"

Sakura wanted to ask what it was to her. But this girl wasn't being hostile, just genuinely curious.

"Yes." She replied.

"Wow!" She said with wide hazel eyes. "You're pretty!"

Sakura didn't know how to reply to such polite bluntness. "Um….thanks?"

"What's your name?" She asked hopping from one foot to the other. The girl couldn't stay still.

Sakura hesitated.

"Oh, sorry. I'm always told I'm rude. What's your name, ma'am?"

Sakura was amused by this. "Kinomoto Sakura." She replied.

"Sakura?" Sakura thought the girl would react badly to Sakura's controversial name. "You mean…like the flower? Wow that's so pretty! I've never seen a Sakura tree before! I heard they use to be all over Tomoeda but then they stopped growing all of a sudden!"

"And….your name?" Sakura inquired.

The girl paused and beamed in delight to have Sakura's interest. She stood up straight and gave a fierce salute. "Cadet Chiharu Mihara."

Chiharu Mihara was a pretty little thing with springy blond hair tied into two pony tails with wide hazel eyes and perfect teeth with the exception of one slightly crooked tooth at the front. Sakura thought it gave her character.

The training fields were still empty, and Sakura took the opportunity. She reached into the interior breast pocket and pulled out her small black notebook.

"Hey, Cadet, can I ask you some questions?" Sakura said.

Chiharu smiled and was gleeful that Sakura wanted to know about her.

"Do you train here everyday?"

"Not everyday." She said and began to twirl her gun in her hand. "Sometimes we go to other terrain and practice when we're not in school."

"You go to school here? At Base?"

Chiharu shook her head, the ends of her pony tails whipping the air as she did so.

"No, outside Base."

"How long do you train for? Do you use real guns?"

"About eight hours a day. And nah, they won't give us real guns yet, this one's not even loaded." She said and pretended to fire it in the distance making gunshot noises with her mouth.

Sakura resisted criticising the fact that they worked for so long.

"How old are you?"

"Fifteen." She said proudly, puffing her chest with pride.

 _So young,_ Sakura thought. "And what are you training for? Why do you need guns?"

Chiharu shrugged which worried Sakura. They didn't even know what their objective was. Sakura was jotting everything down quickly.

"So are you like, a reporter or something?"

Sakura nodded, "Sure."

"Cadet, why was the Lieutenant shouting at you?" Sakura asked. She needed to know what happened earlier.

"Which Lieutenant?" Chiharu asked. "They all shout at me at some point."

"Lieutenant Colonel Li. He seemed…annoyed with you earlier."

"Oh pffftt." Chiharu said and waved it off like it was nothing. "It's cause I talk too much during drills. I can't help it. It's like if I stay quiet too long I'll explode. But he doesn't mean it! It's just so that the other Cadet's fall into line.

"Seems a little…. extreme doesn't it?"

Chiharu shook her head. "Nah, Lieutenant Colonel Li is the nicest guy around here!"

Sakura didn't know why that comment spread a little relief and warmth in her. Chiharu clearly thought highly of Syaoran. This only heightened Sakura's guilt about her behaviour.

"How do your parents feel about you being here?"

Chiharu's smile dropped and her eyes clouded over with a sudden sadness. "I eh...I don't know. I haven't seen them in nine months."

"What? Why?"

Chiharu shrugged and kicked a stone. "Dunno. It's just the rules. Parents can visit once a year, but we don't leave Base except for school."

"And you chose to come here?"

Chiharu looked away shyly. "Well… not really. But my parents can't afford to stay in them nice houses here. They didn't want to move to the East so…I enrolled here so now they can pay less to stay here too."

"That's…terrible…" Sakura didn't mean to say it like that but it came out that way.

"It's ok. I mean, Lieutenant Li always makes sure I'm ok. In fact, he's the one who made it possible for me to be here. They'd never have let me come here otherwise. I'm not the smartest, or most coordinated, or good at drills…"

Sakura took note of this in her notebook. She didn't ask for any more information. It was clear that that line of questioning unsettled Chiharu. Sakura wondered if there was any practical reason for keeping these children away from their parents for so long.

"Hey, are you married?" She asked suddenly, springing back to herself.

"Um, no." Sakura replied confused by her bouncing back and forth.

"Are you engaged?"

"No."

"Dating anyone?"

"No."

"Oh great!" She said clapping her hands together and jumping up and down.

"Why is that great?"

"Well…." Chiharu feigned shyness and swayed from side to side. "I see you sometimes walking towards the train with the Colonel Lieutenant and, well…. some of the other cadets and I think you guys are soooo cute together!"

Sakura's face flushed bright red.

"Are you guys a couple? Please say yes! I asked him today and he just laughed but said nothing but maybe you guys aren't telling anyone yet-"

"HEY!" Blasted a voice from behind them, interrupting Chiharu's gushing.

They both turned around and saw a soldier marching towards. Sakura didn't recognize this woman with jet black hair and eyes as red as rubies. The closer she got, the more Chiharu trembled. Sakura quickly stashed her notebook into her pocket.

"Who are you?" The woman snarled at Sakura.

Before Sakura could answer she fired another question at her. "You have no authorization to be here. Military only!"

The woman's voice boomed and echoed throughout the field but Sakura refused to be phased by her.

"L-Lieutenant Li, it was my fault. S-she was lost and I was h-helping her." Chiharu trembled as she attempted to remain poker straight.

Meiling leered down at Chiharu. "Cadet, this is not the first time you've spoken out of line. If I were you I'd learn to keep your mouth shut! Out of my sight!" Without warning Meiling pushed her hand out with full force and knocked Chiharu on her back.

She landed with a painful thud and sloppily scattered to her feet before saluting Meiling and half-marching-half fleeing away.

Sakura's blood boiled.

"And you." Meiling said, returning her attention to her. "Unless you want to be hauled off to the interrogation centre I suggest you don't say another word and leave."

Sakura clenched her jaw and her hatred for military was fuelled again. But for now, Sakura had already tried the Patience of Syaoran, she wouldn't test Meiling.

Sakura left without a word.

Sakura didn't realize it, but she was very lucky. Due to the incredible stress Meiling was under…she didn't notice who Sakura was. If she did, Sakura may not have been so lucky to have been caught snooping around…

X x x

The sun was setting quickly. Sakura checked her watch and panicked.

The interaction with Cadet Chiharu had held her up longer than she had expected and she was late for her train. She pounded her feet towards the station and her heart sank when she heard the train horn as it pulled away from the station.

She asked a very disgruntled member of staff when the next train was.

"6:00 a.m" He said behind his newspaper.

Sakura panicked. She was stuck in the South until morning. The was nothing she could do. She knew nobody, nobody except for the Colonel Lieutenant who fired her.

The area around the train station had a creepy vibe. She decided to head towards the lights of the area beside Base. As she approached it she heard voices, laughs, music and a few cars. She stood under a lamppost and realized that this must have been the Chinzoe-Eki Mae district she briefly read about in one of the many books she handled in the Base library. It was the lively part of the South infested with probably drunk soldiers, soldiers wives and mistresses and ordinary South-wall citizens. Not all of the South was made up of soldiers, Sakura learned. Over forty per cent of the population were ordinary citizen who were not in the military, only supporters of it. Many of them were just lucky that their grandparents happened to live there pre-takeover.

The houses were nice, nicer than the ones in the East anyway.

Sakura didn't stay long there. She didn't fancy being caught and questioned by a passing soldier or worse.

She walked down a quieter path which ran alongside the canal. Behind her the music faded slightly. Her feet ached with tiredness so she settled against an old brick house which seemed to be turned into some sort of factory.

Her feet ached, she was jobless. Then she began to think about the repercussions that would befall her. She didn't know how Lieutenant Li would react. Would she never hear from him again? Was that it? Was he done with her? Or would she be hauled into interrogation? No, there would be no interrogation because it was the son of the General's word against hers. She would be send to the West.

Sakura's heart began to thump and her palms sweat. What has she done? She ruined her life, her own doing. Her eyes began to well in her hopelessness. What would her father think?

Sakura gasped. Her father! She never for a second even thought of what this would do to _him_! Would he be punished too? After his strained relationship with the military, was this the icing on the cake? Would he be done for due to her actions? Her poor father, she thought. If there was one person she wanted to protect, it was him.

Fat tears rolled down her cheeks and into the corners of her lips. She felt sick, she felt tired, she felt angry and hopeless at the same time. And it was all happening on the anniversary of Toya's death. How could she tell Fujitaka that he might lose another child?

X x x

Syaoran wasn't enjoying himself as much as he wanted to.

It must have been written on his face because Warren, the barman kept sliding him another beer when Syaoran's glass went

empty.

Around him, close friends who he had trained with slugged back the alcohol and exchanged stories about their jobs, sexual encounters they had while on duty and why the Southern National soccer team was losing to the East, despite the fact that none of them played it. The bar was mainly filled with off-duty soldiers, men and women but many were also just citizens coming to their local bar

There was lively music from the jukebox and drunks slurred the lyrics and laughed with it. It was a good atmosphere, but Syaoran wasn't feeling it. Sakura was weighing heavily on his mind. Why, _why_ did he say that? In the moment, he didn't know how to handle her outburst. It came from nowhere. But when Syaoran didn't know what to do, he did what his father would do. Except if it were his father, Sakura would be deep in the West, never to be seen again.

Syaoran fought with his decision. Was it right to fire her? Of course, it was! He couldn't have her shooting her mouth off the military, against the South.

What she said was anti-governmental. Anti-Utopia. It was, was….

 _But was there some truth to it…? Is there a reason you avoid going to the West…?_ Said a small voice in the back of his head. No! He shook his head to rid these thoughts. He would not let her sway what has been ingrained in his mind for twenty-six years. He wouldn't succumb to these thoughts, they were harmful.

"I'm telling you! It happened!" Said one of the soldiers. He was slightly younger than Syaoran and liked to boast about anything he did.

"Bollox," Said the older man across from him. He was older and a respected retired soldier. He smoked a cigar and looked at the young soldier with suspicion. "You're telling me a _Northern_ woman invited you, _you,_ into her bedroom." He said eyeing up the skinny young soldier. "And wanted a transfer."

"By any. Means. Possible. That's what she said." The young soldier said with confidence.

"I don't believe you. All them posh totties in the North want to stay put. They don't want lanky sting of piss like you." He wheezed, blowing smoke from his mouth.

This comment got a roar of laughter from the other soldiers.

"I'm telling you! She invited me in, brought me to her room to _'_ _show me'_ this old rifle used pre-takeover and then started to unbutton her blouse there and then. She let me have a good look so she did."

"Oh yeah?" Piped up a female soldier with a buzz cut. "Then whatcha do?" She asked with a smirk.

All soldiers waited for him to answer. He took a while.

"Well….nothing, cause her husband came home at that exact second."

There was silence followed by an eruption of laughter that shook the whole bar.

"Bullshit." Someone commented. "If anyone could do that then it's Lieutenant Colonel Li over there. I bet he could charm the Queen into the picking potatoes out of manure the West if he wanted!"

More laughter and Syaoran received some pats on the back.

"Go on Li. Tell us. How many offers do you get a week? How many women are throwing themselves at you right now?" They joked.

Syaoran smiled tightly, brought a beer to his lips and said nothing.

"Ah come on lads, a gentleman never tells." The older man offered.

"Nah, I'd say he's just lost count!" The buzz cut girl said and they all, even Syaoran roared laughing.

The drinks were now flowing. Syaoran lost count of how many beers he had, but he didn't mind. It was so nice to not think about work, about the growing tension over the walls. And most importantly, he was glad to stop thinking about _her._ She took up enough of his thoughts. He promised himself to let her invade no more.

The bar began to close. Some soldiers responsibly called it a night, some soldiers had their wives come collect their drunken bodies, and the older ones would remain locked in until the wee hours of the morning.

Syaoran left when the night was still pitch black. It was only until the cool air hit his lungs he realized he was much drunker than he thought. He patted down his breast pockets to feel for the cigarette one of the bar maids handed him. He found it but struggled to get the lighter.

"Need help?" Asked a woman who joined him.

Syaoran barely made out her face, but he thought she was pretty, but too much make up. She lit up his cigarette and leaned against the bar, trying to stop his head from spinning.

"So, I heard you guys all talk in there. Is it true that you're _the_ Lieutenant Colonel Li? The Generals son?" She asked bit down on her lip.

Syaoran grunted for a yes and leaned against the door again for support.

"I'm Jean." She said and ran a finger over her lips. She had short bright blond curly hair and wore bright red lipstick. Those were the only colours Syaoran could see.

"You know. I notice you all the time. You don't seem to look at me. Am I not pretty?" She said in an annoyingly high pitched baby voice.

"Come on," She said when he didn't respond. "You shouldn't stay out here. Let's go back to mine. I'll make you some coffee…I live right around the corner." Syaoran wasn't listening anymore. Only when her hand grabbed his crotch did he become alert.

"Whoa, whoa. No." He said and put distance between them.

"I won't say anything. My family is respectable, honest. I'm training to be a nurse, see. It'd be perfect. A nurse and a soldier. You're single, right? I asked Jamie Miller and he said you weren't with anyone-"

"You're not my type." He called over his shoulder as he walked away. Syaoran admitted that that was a little harsh but didn't stop to apologize. He wanted to go home. He didn't want to spend the night with that woman.

He lived a little outside Chizou-eki mae unlike the other soldiers who preferred to remain within the comfort of Base.

He swayed along the canal and heard the music behind him die out. He rubbed his eyes, hoping he'd sober up quicker. He halted and tweaked his ears. He thought he heard a sound. He was about to keep walking but he heard it again. Someone was crying. He looked around but saw no one.

A few steps further up beside the coal factory he saw someone slumped over and quietly weeping. He eased over to the person.

Sakura heard someone near her and snapped her head up in panic.

Syaoran looked down at her with the same shock. Seeing her here knocked some sobriety into him.

Sakura bolted upright. Syaoran saw her face was red and she shivered in the cool night. The alcohol had slowed Syaoran's thoughts. Sakura couldn't believe he was here, witnessing her weak state. She turned away and began to leave.

"Wait!" Syaoran called out.

Surprisingly Sakura stopped and casted a teary green eye at him. Syaoran took an uneasy step forward. "Why are you still here?" He asked.

Sakura rubbed her arms to warm herself. "I…missed the train." Her voice was so weak. She had cried so much while pondering her future. Her possible exile, the repercussions on her father…

"Why didn't you tell me?" He asked raising his voice in concern.

Sakura mistook this for anger. She balled her fists. "You fired me. Remember!?" She was on the verge of fresh tears. Could she be anymore humiliated?

"It doesn't matter!" Syaoran fired back. "You should have told me! Why didn't you ask Marie to call me? I would have of course helped you. I wouldn't just leave you here."

"What do you care anyway? Why does anyone care?"

Syaoran saw Sakura go to retaliate more but her posture broke before she could. She was physical and mentally exhausted. She couldn't fight him anymore, it was just two much work. Anyway, what would she achieve in fighting with him now?

She had used up the last of her energy and gave into new tears. She buried her head into her hands to try and muffle her sobs. This was never supposed to happen. Sakura could hear herself screaming at her, telling her not to be so weak, don't be so pathetic. She was so humiliated.

Syaoran was numbed into silence. He saw her shoulders quiver. He took a slow step forward, careful not to startle her. He placed the tip of his fingers onto her shoulder. She didn't shake him off. Slowly he turned her around but she kept her face hidden. Her hands were guarding her. It was her last defence. Syaoran's hands rested on her wrists and brought them down easily.

She was still crying. She squeezed her eyes shut as if in denial that this was happening. He took her chin and tilted it towards him. She was afraid to open her eyes but when she did she saw him staring down at her with such intense amber eyes that it subdued her crying.

Her face was raw and her lip quivered with a vulnerability that Syaoran never guessed she would possess. The wall she had built up was finally collapsed and behind it was a young girl Syaoran had never met.

Sakura's breath caught. She gulped when she realized how close his face was to hers. For the longest time they stood like this, saying nothing. Syaoran held her shoulders lightly and analysed every feature of her face. He moved in closer, this scared Sakura, but she didn't pull away.

Sakura's eyes expanded. Was he going to kiss her? Did she want him to?

Then suddenly, his weight pressed down on her. His face moved past hers and he held her in a heavy embrace. Although, embrace was not the right word. It was more of a support and Sakura suddenly felt herself holding him to keep him from falling on top of her.

"Lieutenant what are you-"

Sakura was cut off by the sound of Syaoran throwing up and it hitting the ground.

Sakura tensed and her mouth dropped into a small 'o'. He was still hanging into her and she barely held his weight up.

"Did…did any of that…get on my shoes?" She asked and tried to keep from emitting a girlish squeal.

Syaoran said nothing for a second and then mumbled. "Surprisingly….no."

They stood like this for a moment longer, neither of them knowing how to approach the awkwardness of it.

The silence was broken by a silent giggle from Sakura which then escalated into laughter. She buried her head into Syaoran's chest to muffle herself. She was somewhere in between laughing and crying with embarrassment. Then finally Syaoran gave in and laughed too.

"You have the weirdest sense of humour." He said which made her laugh more. The tears were still falling down her face. At least they were even now. Sakura felt less embarrassed by herself after the Lieutenant Colonel almost threw up on her.

"It…can't…get …worse…than this." She said both crying and laughing.

X x x

Syaoran cleaned himself up and felt much soberer now.

When he returned, Sakura was warming herself under his jacket. She had calmed down.

"A driver will be her in about ten minutes. He'll drive you home." Syaoran said and sat down beside her.

"I don't have that much money on me."

"It's on me." He said and Sakura didn't argue. She just wanted to crawl into her bed, pull the sheet over and never think of this day again.

"How much did you drink?" Sakura asked with a playful smile.

Syaoran smirked and rubbed his head in embarrassment. "More than the norm." He replied. "Trust me, throwing up near girls isn't something I do on a regular basis."

Sakura laughed again. She wondered how, given everything that's happened in the last twenty-four hours, she could possible find anything amusing.

"Your secret is safe with me." She said and smiled at him.

They looked out at the moon's reflection on the canal. It was a beautiful sight. Sakura's face fell suddenly. Syaoran crossed his arms and sighed.

"What's wrong?" Syaoran asked.

Sakura bit her lip and kept her eyes down. She swallowed a lump in her throat. "Lieutenant Li…"

"Syaoran." He interrupted.

Sakura looked up at him as if he spoke a different language.

"No more Lieutenant Li, ok? I hate the formality. When it's just us, you can call me Syaoran."

Sakura kept her eyes on him and mulled over his name in her mind. She had forgotten his first name until now. She ran her eyes over his strong jaw, his gently lips and his eyes, which could be both warming and intense at the same time. Syaoran….Syaoran….she liked that name.

"Syao-ran…" She said, testing it out for the first time. "Syao…ran..."

"Something on your mind?" He asked and playfully nudged her but her face was serious.

"Syaoran, about today….I'm sorry. I…didn't mean to be so…well."

Syaoran nodded.

"It wasn't aimed at you. I just….have a problem with knowing when to shut up." She admitted. It was strange for her to speak so freely without putting too much thought into her words.

Sakura shuffled nervously. "But…what I said today...please, please don't punish my father for it. He doesn't think like that. I…just please leave him be. Don't punish him for my stupidity." She felt her chest swell and tears gathering in her eyes. "Do whatever with me. Exile, prison, I don't care just leave him be. Please." Tears fell again over her cheeks.

Syaoran sighed heavily. He wiped a tear from her eye with the back of his finger.

"I didn't know it was the anniversary of your brother's death." He said softly. Sakura froze. Oh, no, not again. Syaoran came across this information accidentally when he was getting her files together after their fight.

"Is this the part where you tell me it was his fault. That he shouldn't have disobeyed military orders, he shouldn't have been there, that I shouldn't be surprised at how things worked out?" She said with some bitterness.

Syaoran didn't respond to that. "If I knew that this was a particularly difficult time for you, I would have understood why you were upset today. I wouldn't have reacted so harshly. I'm sorry, for the way I reacted and…for what you've been through."

Sakura didn't know what to say. He was sorry for _her._ "Nothing is going to happen to your father. Or to you for that matter." He said and produced a key card to her.

Sakura looked at him confused. How, how can he be the General's son and yet say those kind words? She couldn't figure him out. She reached out and took the key card from her.

"Thank you." She whispered.

"Look," He said and sighed. "I may have been a bit harsh in firing you so suddenly like that. But…Sakura, you really have to watch what you say and do. I didn't react like that because I was angry with you, but because I was worried for you. If anyone else heard you talking like that, you'd be sitting in interrogation right now." His face was serious. He wanted her to know what a lucky escape she had.

Sakura understood. She couldn't help but notice the flutter in her chest when he called her Sakura.

"So…you won't tell the General or anyone…about today?"

Syaoran shook his head. "No. But I'm serious. You have to watch what you say. And also, you have to stop being suspicious of us all. We're not all what you think we are."

Sakura bit her tongue from asking _'_ _What do you mean 'all'?'_

Did he mean…he was different? Did he want her to know that he wasn't like that? Sakura nodded and said no more.

"So, if you want it, you can have your job back."

"Really?" Sakura asked in shock. "I can come back? Tomorrow?"

Syaoran laughed. "Yes, tomorrow, if you're that eager."

"And nothing will happen to my dad?"

"Nothing will happen to either of you. I promise."

Sakura felt sweet relief wash over her. She didn't ruin everything. She had escaped narrowly. "Thank you…Syaoran."

They looked into each other's eyes, everything became silent as the air around them shifted. The General's son and the journalist's daughter. One from the South, the other from the East. It shouldn't work, they should naturally repel but… Sakura felt something pull her towards him. Some part of her that she shunned away so long ago was coming to the surface and leading her face closer to his.

The moment was exciting, scary and warm. Their faces were so close now…

A flash of light in the distance passed over them and made Sakura jump in fright. They looked over and saw a car making its way down the road towards them.

They both jumped up at the same time. Sakura's face flushed red. What was that? That moment?

Syaoran waved down the car. "Driver is here." He said with a small shy smile.

Sakura nodded and gathered her things.

"See you tomorrow, Ms. Kinomoto." He said casting an eye on the driver.

Sakura nodded, the blush in her cheeks refused to move. "Lieutenant Li." She said and nodded.

As she bundled into the car she fluttered her hand to her heart and commanded it to cease its rapid beating.

Had it been a moment longer, would she have kissed him? The thoughts of it made her heart beat faster. Would she have regretted it? Yes, absolutely. He was a soldier. She was from the East. But if it was as simple as that, why didn't replay the moment over and over again in her head.

She shook her head. She was being careless. To even suggest kissing him….ridiculous!

The Eastern wall came into view and Sakura relaxed, she was home.

She thought about what Syaoran said, about how all soldiers were not the same. Was he giving her a chance to see that? Either way, Sakura was happy to receive a second chance.

Because next time, she'd be smarter.

If she was going to make progress with disassembling the Tomoedan regime, she needed a new tactic.

She smiled, she knew exactly what to do.

X x x

 **Thank you for all your reviews so far. They really help me shape the content and characters of future chapters.**

 **Hope to update soon.**


	8. Into the West

**I've had a few days off work to power through with this story! :)**

 **Enjoy!**

Eriol watched on in helplessness as another van entered the village. It was the sixth one this week.

Paranoia was making its way around the locals and there was nothing Eriol could do to ease their fears. The van diverted down a dirt path towards a small cul de sac.

"They're trying to break us." His mother mumbled, appearing out of nowhere.

"At this rate," He replied. "They'll succeed."

"Well, what are you going to do about it?" She asked and looked at the confusion and worry on the villagers faces. "We have to restore the people's faith in you."

"There's nothing I can do, mother. The Military knows something's up, they're not stupid. Maybe if Kinomoto hadn't been so rash with his unplanned attack-"

"Or maybe if _you_ had been involved, the military wouldn't be hauling innocent people to who knows where and _we_ wouldn't be so lacking in support!" She was angry now. Angry at Eriol for letting Toya Kinomoto win support.

"I'm not talking about this with you again. We have a problem here. They're just going to keep coming here until we give up whoever planned the attack against the King."

Eriol's mother took a deep breath through her nose. She could see the tremendous pressure her son was under. But he was just going to have to deal with it.

"Eriol, I know you don't agree with Kinomoto's methods, but regardless, it's getting people's attention. The villagers have had enough of resolution talks and peaceful negotiations. They've worked for us in the past but now…."

"Now they want blood, right?" Eriol fumed.

"We're getting desperate Eriol. The South have taken most of our produce this year. We're surviving on the basics now. The people are angry and Kinomoto knows how to tap into that."

"So we should base our future on a psychopath?"

"I'll admit he is a bit unhinged, but if you were working together…"

"No. That will never happen."

His mother clamped her jaw shut. He wouldn't budge from his morals. It was going to be his downfall.

They heard a voice shouting from the direction the van went. "They've taken Milly!" He shouted. He was drowned out by the van as it came back out and sped away.

"What do you mean?" Eriol asked and rushed over to him.

The man was out of breath and wheezed as he explained that the military drove up to the house of Frank Wethers and within the space of two minutes they had taken their thirteen-year-old daughter into custody on suspicion of terrorist plotting.

"That's outrageous!"Eriol's mother interjected. "She's just a child how could they possibly have any ground to suspect her-"

"They're squeezing us." Eriol said. "They want one of us to break by any means necessary."

Eriol glared down the path where the van and Milly disappeared. His mother and Frank left to comfort the family. Eriol turned to head for the fields where he could think. He made his way past the houses to and down a quiet path which was shaded by trees.

It was only after a while he realized someone was following him. He stopped and listened. When he turned he saw Toya standing with an amused look on his face, his rifle loyally attached to his hip. Toya had his arms crossed and his head tilted to the side. Eriol despised the look of arrogance which permanently displayed on his face.

"Something I can help you with Toya?" Eriol asked with annoyance on his face.

Toya smiled, showing his perfect teeth, and snickered. "I think it's more something I can help you with."

Eriol sawed his teeth against each other and tried not to rise to Toya. "I don't need anything from you Toya, so if you'll excuse me."

"I know where they're taking them." He said, referring to the villagers in custody.

It grabbed Eriol's attention for a second before he shrugged it off. Toya was full of shit, as per usual.

"If you ask nicely, I'll get them back for you. I'll even give you the credit." He called in a casual voice.

"Oh, really? And why would you do that for me."

Toya smiled and took a step towards him. "Because, we're comrades."

Eriol narrowed his eyes. "We are not comrades. You're not from the West, you don't know us, our cultures, our values. Don't you ever put us in the same boat." Eriol stabbed a finger at Toya but his voice remained low as always.

"Don't you have family to go back to?" Eriol asked.

A dark looked flashed over Toya's face. It was either sadness, pain or annoyance. Eriol didn't know which one.

Then, Toya smirked as if unfazed."Eriol, we have a common enemy, it's ridiculous for us to be on opposite sides here."

"We will resolve this, my way." He said calmly and turned to leave.

"And what about when they come for Ruby?"

Eriol froze mid-step.

"You know it's going to happen. And in her condition, I doubt she'd last long either."

Eriol said nothing, for Toya had just confirmed his worst nightmare. He denied it for so long but the possibility was there that Meiling would come after Ruby in order to pressure him.

"Your influence around here is loosening, Eriol. The Military are planning something big."

"What's in it for you? What do you get out of helping me?" Eriol asked. "I don't exactly have money to give you."

Toya smiled, Eriol was becoming desperate enough to accept his help.

"I'm a man of simple taste, Eriol." He said and lessened the gap between them. "All I want, is respect."

Eriol raised an eyebrow.

"I want inclusion in the village meetings and an equal say in whatgoes, whenever, wherever I want. The villagers have a right to that."

"No." Eriol said firmly. "After the shit you pulled at the King's speech. Forget about it."

"There isn't a way around this. We're going to have to work together eventually. Is your pride really worth Ruby's life?"

That was the ultimate blow. Toya knew he had Eriol in a corner.

"Where are they taking them?" Eriol asked in hesitation.

Toya twisted his mouth and weighed the thought of telling him. He decided to meet him halfway.

"The prisons are running out of spaces. They intend to hold the villagers for custody, they won't kill them."

"So where is the military hiding them?"

"…Tomoeda Asylum."

Eriol let out a short laugh. "You won't half a mile near there before they put a bullet through your head."

"Don't underestimate me."

"Get the villagers back, then we'll talk. No negotiations before then."

A sly smile crept on Toya's face.

"Deal."

X x x

After almost a week Tomoyo was barely holding on to her sanity.

It was as if she had finally been woken up from a deep delusion and for the first time since her childhood, she was seeing things clearer.

In comparison to the other patients, Tomoyo was sound of mind. It didn't take Tomoyo long to realize that her royal status and privileged life meant nothing here.

She had overheard conversations. Some about remembering the good old days when Tomoeda was unified, some spoke in languages Tomoyo never heard of. But one conversation between two patients struck fear into her. As she waited in line for food she overheard the two patients in front of her discussing ways in detail how they'd torture the monarch.

Tomoyo decided it was best never to speak.

When she slept, they cuffed her to the bed for her own safety. When she ate she kept her head down, ate quickly and disappeared back into her room. She had been beaten up once. A horrific ordeal that happened as she went to shower before a patient who was known to have a short temper. The other patients howled late into the night with injustice. A girl named Madison, who took some sort of liking to Tomoyo explained.

As the days went by the asylum began to fill with more patients. Except, they didn't seem like patients. They were hoarded in like cattle. Some dazed and confused, some beaten with bloodied faces.

Tomoyo's sheltered life hadn't prepared her for this.

"Of course they're angry. The Military probably sent them her without proper assessment." Madison explained. Madison had long dark hair and a pout to match Tomoyo's. With exception to the height difference, it would be easy to mix them up.

"Why would they do that?" Tomoyo asked. Her voice was so meek, she hadn't spoken properly in days.

Madison shrugged. "The Military find a way to send you here, or the west, or anywhere out of sight."

"Why are you here then?" Tomoyo asked.

Madison sighed. "My sister was assaulted by a soldier. My father tried to defend her but the soldier shot him. At the trial the soldier claimed my family were anti-governmental and assaulted them first. My sister was sent to prison and I was brought here because I'm a minor."

"That's not fair." Tomoyo said, her throat closing.

Madison shrugged. "Nothing in Tomoeda is fair. It's just the way it is."

"You should have went to court again! Or appealed to the monarch."

"Shush! Do you want to be beaten? If they heard you say that you'll be in trouble."

Tomoyo snapped her mouth shut but still seethed in anger.

"Anyway," Madison snickered. "As if the Monarch care. Up there in the North on their high horses."

Tomoyo's chest tightened. Is that how the world really saw them? Saw her?

She lay awake at night and wondered if her mother would ever return for her. Was this all a test to finally break her spirit. Tomoyo didn't know which terrified her more, the thoughts of returning to the palace and resigning herself to her duties, or staying in the asylum, fearing her sanity.

But when sleep did come to her, her dreams would wander to the West. To that terribly wonderful day where she almost lost her life, and yet was reborn with a new sense of purpose. The west. The west…was this a sign? Seeing those people had awakened something in her. She began to question her whole life, her life's purpose. She had spent a majority of her life wishing away her privileged Northern life and yet, these people weren't fortunate enough to share her complaints.

And yet…did she want that old life back…?

A month had passed but Tomoyo felt like she's been there for eternity. She'd lost so much weight, her eyes had sunken into her skull and her appetite had left her. As the asylum began to fill up she felt more claustrophobic. She had reached her breaking point.

She had decided, she would go home. She would re-join her family, unwillingly take up her duties as heir to the throne and leave her dreams and delusions at the asylum.

She had it all planned. She'd approach the nurse who knew of her identity, ask her to contact the Queen, beg for her mother's forgiveness and grovel at her feet. If her mother forgave her, she's return and give up her antics. It was settled. She decided not to say anything to Madison. Not that she even could if she wanted to, Madison would only want to kill her if she knew Tomoyo's identity anyway.

After her final dinner, she began to approach the nurse who was sitting at the corner of the large leisure area doing a crossword puzzle. Tomoyo's knees quivered as she approached her. She fought with all her might to silence the doubts in the back of her mind. If she went through with this there was no going back. That thought alone frightened her.

She stopped in front of the nurse. The nurse made an irritated sound as she pried her eyes from the crossword. Tomoyo opened her mouth to speak and the words hesitantly made their way to her lips.

Tomoyo was cut off by a low tremble of the earth. The ground shook for ten seconds before returning to silence. Everyone on the leisure room stopped what they were doing. In the silence, there was the unmistakable sound of gunshots coming from the far end of the asylum. Panic erupted.

Tomoyo stood still with fear as the gunshots seemed to spread to everywhere. An alarm went off followed by flashing red lights.

 _'_ _Attention staff and patients. There is a security breach. Please return to your wards immediately. I repeat, please return to your wards immediately. Failure to do so now will result in severe punishment.'_

Everyone scrambled in different direction but Tomoyo stood still. Her panicked mind couldn't bring her to move until someone grabbed her wrists and dragged her out the side door which led to the East wing.

"Madison what are you doing? We're heading _towards_ the gunshots we'll be killed." Tomoyo screamed.

"No, we won't." Madison said with a crooked smile. "They've come, they've come to free us."

"Who? Who are _they_?"

"The Westerners! They've come to save us! They blew a hole through the wall of the eastern wing.

We can make our escape through there!"

"Es….cape?" Tomoyo murmured. She should have stopped running if she were to return home…right? But her brain could not come up with a sensible response. "But…Madison, escape to where?"

"Idiot!" Madison said and rolled her eyes. "To the West of course. They're the only ones who care about us! Don't you know? The asylum sits on the border between the West and the South! We can make it if we hurry!"

Tomoyo said nothing as she gathered this information. The border of the west. She had no idea she was so close.

They emerged into the Eastern court and what they saw made both of them halt. A massive hole had been blown out of the wall, but they were not the only ones who thought of escape. Many were already scrambling out of the wall, some had already escaped. Some were shot down before they could even reach river beyond the wall. Shot were fired out of the wall and into the wall.

"The rebels are here!" Madison squealed in delight.

Tomoyo began to shake her head. "Madison…we can't survive that. You'll be shot down before you even get to the wall."

"No, look!" Madison pointed over to the mountain beyond the wall and saw that some patients had already made it out alive. However, they were so far away Tomoyo couldn't possibly phantom how they'd survive.

"Madison…we can't…We'll never make it."

Madison dropped Tomoyo's hand and a flash or anger consumed her face. "I am NOT going to die here by the Military's hands. I'd rather die making my escape. They don't own me, they don't own any of us!"

Tomoyo went to protest again but Madison had already took off into the madness. In the split moment Tomoyo followed her. The smoke consumed them both before the miraculously made it through the walls. There were people shooting from both sides Tomoyo couldn't distinguish who the supposed 'saviours' were.

"We're…going to make it…" Tomoyo said with a trembling voice. She could see the river down the bottom of the hill and the steep ascension of the mountain that marked the West.

"Madison! We're almost there!" She called in pre-mature glee. Madison looked behind her, mirroring her happiness.

It was short lived.

A bullet shattered her scalp and she fell into the dirt.

Tomoyo fell to her knees and skidded to a halt beside her.

"M-Madison?"

Madison didn't respond. Tomoyo had a second to react. More bullets were coming towards her. A bullet whipped over her head which sent her heart to her throat. She took one last look at Madison. Her eyes were blank and the blood had began to ooze down her forehead.

"I'm sorry." She whispered and got onto her feet once more. She had no time. She trudged through the shallow river and climbed out the other side. The thick woods swallowed her and defended her from incoming bullets. Again, Tomoyo prematurely let herself be relieved before a bullet plunged into her back. Her body rolled down the side of the mountain and slammed to a halt against a tree.

Darkness descended and the sound of boots came closer towards her.

X x x

King Daidouji sat with a blank expression, the news was slow to process.

The large room with silent as Sonomi and the King's advisor waited for him to react. The King rested his elbows on his knees and let his forehead fall into the palm of his hands. He felt bile rise in his throat and struggled to swallow it down.

Sonomi's whole face bleached white and her hands trembled on her lap. She, too was struggling to fully accept the news.

The large wooden clock struck 11:30. It had been an hour since the attack at Tomoeda Asylum.

"Sonomi…." He said. His voice was raspy. "You said….she was staying at my sisters…"

The Queen looked up. Her stomach dropped when he mentioned her name.

"Ralph…" She whispered, begging for his understanding. "I…I didn't think, I never could have imagined this would happen. I was going back for her tomorrow. I swear, it was just to teach her a lesson…I never thought that this….that something like this…" Sonomi couldn't bring herself to speak anymore. She buried her face into her hands, the shame was heavy.

The King did not go to comfort her. He was disgusted by her and by himself.

"You put our daughter into an asylum…to _teach her a lesson_." When he said it aloud Sonomi felt the guilt and shame double.

"I did it for you Ralph." She whispered. Every word she spoke burned. "I wanted to shock her. I wanted to open her eyes so she'd appreciate her life here and take the throne with gratitude. I never imagined that…this…something like this…" Sonomi broke down into new tears but the King did not stir.

"Your Majesty." Said his advisor in a sombre tone. "The Lieutenant General is here. Shall I send her in?"

The King nodded. Though his face was calm his heart pounded at frightening speed. The Lieutenant General didn't need permission, it was just out of courtesy. The King had no time to be prepped on how to handle the General. Sonomi's actions were going to have consequences on the King.

Lieutenant General Mizuki entered followed by Meiling and Syaoran.

The Lieutenant General and Meiling held stern faces while Syaoran displayed worry. Sonomi reached a hand out for Syaoran. He kneeled down beside her and patted his hand. Apart from the King and Queen, Syaoran may have been the only other person with genuine concern for Tomoyo's whereabouts.

"Your Majesty," The Lieutenant General said and bowed. She took a seat opposite the King. "I'm very sorry for your current circumstance."

The King nodded, he chose his words carefully. "Is there any update? Has she been found?" The King's voice was rushed, eager for answers.

Mizuki took a deep breath, adding another painstaking second to the pause. "There is no update. The Princess was not seen by any staff or officials. It seems that none of the security, nor anyone in the Military knew that your daughter was admitted to the asylum. Tell me, your majesty, why was that?" She asked casually, but the King knew she was angry. _He_ was angry. Perhaps the Gneral was too angry to come see the King himself. Sonomi's actions without consulting or updating the military wasn't just a stupid mistake. It was sly.

"I apologize. I have only learned of this information about my daughter in the past hour."

Sonomi kept her head down and sobbed quietly.

"Please, if you have anything, find anything about where our daughter is, if she's alive or-" He cut himself off. He didn't want to even think of his daughter dead. But the possibility was there.

"Your Majesty. My sources can confirm that she was not found among the bodies in the asylum or in the area so-"

"So why have you not made a broadcast yet!?" The Queen interrupted. "If she's not there the she must have escaped and is wandering around somewhere! Why aren't all your soldiers out there now finding her!? We need everyone to look-"

"You Highness," Interrupted Meiling. Meiling's face was stony, holding contempt for the Queens behaviour towards the Lieuteant General. "With all due respect if the Princess did manage to escape the last thing we want is to broadcast it to all of Tomoeda."

"But why?" The King asked, becoming more impatient.

Meiling looked to Mizuki for permission to continue. He nodded.

"If the Princess escaped and wandered towards the Northern, Eastern or Southern walls, she will be picked up by officials who have been informed of the situation. But…"

"But what? But what!?"

"But, the asylum is located within the walls of the West. There is a strong likelihood that she may have blindly followed the other escapees to flee from the attack, into the West." Meiling paused and looked down at the Queen. "Your Highness, I assume the Princess knows that is she ever ended up in a situation that stranded her in the West, she would be wise to never reveal her identity."

"Of course!" The Queen responded. "She knows what they'd do to her if they knew. She'd never give away her identity."

Meiling nodded. "Then in that case, if she does not show up at the other walls, we search for her within the West, subtly under the radar."

"But why?" The King said desperately. "Why can't you go in there now? Burn every one of their houses to the ground if you have to just find her!"

"You Majesty, if she is within the Western walls, among the Westerners then the last thing we want to do is broadcast it to the whole nation. If they know she is among them they will find her and hold her to ransom. Maybe not, maybe they will just kill her before we even have a chance to get to her."

The King and Queen became silent. They were right. If the Westerners knew the Princess was within their walls, Tomoyo would be executed instantly.

"Please…" The King begged. "Please bring her back to us."

The Lieutenant General adjusted his hat and grunted. "We will do our best, your Majesty."

Without any more words she rose and signalled the other the it was time to leave. Syaoran patted the Queens hand and assured her they'd find her.

"Oh, and one more thing." Mizuki said. She looked over her should at the King and Queen. Her eyes were stony. "The General does not like to be kept out of the loop. In the future, I think it would be wise for your sake, to inform the Military before you make such rash decisions." He eyes flickered to Sonomi accusingly before they left.

It was a warning they shouldn't take lightly.

The three of them walked silently through the palace corridors. Syaoran's mind raced through all the possibilities. His friend was missing. He had to find her no matter what.

"Lieutenant General." He said.

Mizuki and Meiling paused and looked back at him.

"What is it Lieutenant Colonal?" She asked raising an eyebrow.

"With your permission, I would like to lead the search into finding the Princess." He said with such confidence that Meiling was even impressed at his boldness. It was not like Syaoran to ever request for things. Usually he'd just take orders as they came and completed them without hesitation. Meiling admired that in him, but his lack or ambition also bothered her.

Mizuki eyed him for a second before turning away. "Absolutely not." She answered and began to walk.

"Lieutenant General?" He asked in surprise.

"Lieutenant Li," Mizuki said referring to Meiling. "How goes the investigation into locating and ceasing dissidents in the western walls?"

Meiling hesitated. "We are doing the best we can, but the area is so vast, and the villagers are remaining tight lipped-"

"Have you found out how they are slipping in and out of the walls?" Mizuki interrupted.

"…We are thoroughly looking into it."

"In other words, no."

Meiling didn't answer. They made their way outside the palace and towards the Military vans. Mizuki turned around to face them both.

"It seems that I gave you too much responsibility too soon Lieutenant Li. It seems to be more than you can handle."

"No, Lieutenant General, it's not too much. I can handle it. I just need more time-"

"Lieutenant Colonel." She said, ignoring Meiling. "Do you have any updates or conclusion on the Kinomoto case?"

Syaoran didn't understand what she was getting at, but he answered anyway. "I don't believe Ms Kinomoto is a threat to national security. No suspicious attempt has been made by her or her father to contact the West."

"I see. Is that your conclusion?"

"Yes, Lieutenant General. I don't think she warrants any further investigation. I'd like to lead the investigation into locating the Princess."

"As I said, the answer is no."

"But-"

"I'm not wasting any good resources into finding a spoilt, psychotic lost little princess. You're needed for other things Syaoran. Bigger than the Princess and that Kinomoto girl."

"Like what?"

"That's something for the General to explain to you. Meiling, I'll leave it to you to find the Princess. But don't waste too much time on it. The best scenario we can hope for is that she gives herself away and has her heard cut off and we can get back to focusing on what matters."

Syaoran and Meiling stood in silence, shocked by her words.

Mizuki snickered. "Oh? Have I surprised you? I suppose you're both still so very young and naïve. Look behind you. Do you think those people in the palace control Tomoeda? No, they're just puppets. So, let the Western savages find the little Princess, let them kill her. Let them think they have a victory." Mizuki walked towards the van and said over her shoulder. "And while they're rejoicing, they won't see the real attack coming."

X x x

Tomoyo hears the rustling of leaves from above.

It's nice.

She lay there listening to the peaceful rustling and cawing of faraway birds. Her eyes were too heavy to open. Her mind tried to piece together what happened. She remembered her feet pounding as she dodged through bullets. He body was damp from the river. All her limbs ached. But her back throbbed with a pain that grew as she came into consciousness.

She groaned and tried to swallow but her throat was so dry.

"She's awake. Somebody get Touya." A voice said.

The voice sounded so far away but when she opened her eyes she saw two faces peering down at her.

"Toya! This one's awake."

Tomoyo tried to say something but her tongue seemed sown to the roof of her mouth.

"Easy," Someone said and passed her a bottle of water. She took it eagerly and drank.

She was lying on the ground staring up at the trees, her back ached as she tried to sit up.

"Whoa, whoa relax. You've been shot in the back. Luckily for you it's just a fractured rib and didn't get anything vital. We've removed the bullet but it's best not to move until the second squad arrives."

"Second…squad? Am I in the South?"

The two men snickered and shook their heads.

A third man walked up behind them. He was much taller than the others with dark brown hair. His face was dirtied but she knew under that there was a handsome face. The other two backed away to let him kneel in front of her. He said nothing for a few second and stared at her with intense eyes.

"Do you remember your name? Where you're from?" He asked.

Tomoyo hesitated. She didn't know where she was, what was happening. All she knew was that they weren't military.

"It's ok," He said softening his face. "You can trust us. We got you out of the asylum."

They were the ones who saved her. She battled with her inner self before she settled on a conclusion that massively changed the course of her life.

"My name is...Madison. I'm from the…East."

It was strange how easily that lie fell from her mouth. With that one sentence, Tomoyo Daidouji was banished from her mind.

Toya nodded with a small smile. "Ok, Madison. Welcome to the West."

x x x


	9. Stage 2: Assimilate

X x x

Fujitaka glanced over his newspaper at Sakura.

Worry creased his forehead once again. She was unnaturally enthusiastic lately. She poured tea into a flask and seemed to be listening intently to the radio.

 _'_ _And with the upcoming Utopia Day, everyone seems to be playing their part. If you also wish to make more of a contribution, please come to support the South East Tomoeda grand Bake Sale! All proceeds will go to the upkeep and safety of all citizens…'_

Sakura milled around consumed by her own thoughts.

Fujitaka frowned. There was a strange weight in the pit of his stomach. Was it worry, fear, anxiety? But for what? She wasn't doing anything to put herself at risk. If anything, she was behaving like the perfect citizen. She hasn't said anything remotely anti-governmental in such a long time.

Fujitaka sighed and looked at the picture of his deceased wife. He grazed the frame with the back of his finger and wondered what she would think of their daughter now. His face saddened. No, he wouldn't think of that.

"How is work?" He asked to pull himself out of that dark place.

"Good." She replied.

This only worsened his anxiety. Lately everything has been 'good.' She is taking everything as it comes. Shouldn't he be happy? No. He wondered what was happening to the old Sakura. Where was her fight going to? Was she being deluded by them? Didn't he want her to assimilate more, in order to protect her? He didn't know anymore. At least, she wouldn't be involved with his past mistakes anymore.

The radio rattled on. _The suspect from the incident in South East Tomoeda, known as Kero Jones was identified by local police and military. Kero Jones, whom after participating in terrorist activity, disappeared along with five other suspects. Thanks to the brilliant work of the military, he was taken out before any further carnage was inflicted. If you know or suspect anyone of plotting anti-governmental or terrorist activity, please report immediately to the police. Remember, we all have a responsibility to uphold Utopia.'_

They both listened in silence. The mood had suddenly dipped.

"Dad, do you…remember Kero Jones?" She asked quietly.

Fujitaka put down his paper. "He and Touya were incredibly close. He was a nice boy."

"Do you think he was a terrorist too?" She asked. Her green eyes searched his face for answers.

Fujitaka knew what he wanted to say. There were so many things he wanted to tell his daughter. So much that he kept from her in order to keep her safe. She was more in the dark than she realized. But as years went by she began to force her way to the answers. He doubted he could keep her innocent forever.

"I don't know…there is a side to everyone that we don't know."

With the vagueness of his reply, Sakura returned to what she was doing. Unsatisfied.

"I'm going to work. When will you be back?" She asked.

Fujitaka has worked in sales for a couple of years now since being banned from journalism and the media. The work was gruelling and unsatisfying and from time to time he had to travel to parts of the North or South to work, leaving Sakura alone.

"About three days. My number is on the counter if you need me. Do you need me to show you how the phone works again?"

Sakura shook her head. She has only every used the telephone once in her life. The bill is incredibly expensive. Only people in the North had the luxury of using one so freely. Besides, the notion of speaking to someone so instantly yet so far away freaked her out.

"I doubt I'll need it." She replied and kissed him on the cheek. "I love you." She told him in her native language. He was one of the only people who didn't scold her for her using _Mahr Bratain_ in lieu of English.

"I love you too." He replied in their native tongue.

As Sakura left she noticed his briefcase and sales note pitches by the front door. It saddened her. She could vaguely recall this house being full of interesting characters and passionate voices. The praise for her father was endless. He was so admired, so loved. The house was never empty.

Then it had all stopped. She glanced back at the kitchen. Everything in her house seemed to be so silent. When did it all change?

 _'_ _What happened, dad?'_ She thought. _'What did you do all those years ago?'_

She sighed and turned her heel. As different as they could be, they shared the same Kinomoto stubbornness.

X X X

It's all an act, of course.

Sakura surprised herself at how easy it was to mould herself into the perfect citizen. She smiled more, bit her tongue and praised Utopia more. But inside, her intentions never swayed. She was determined to expose the secrets hidden in the South.

By now she had made a series of notes.

The gates to the West open twice a day. Once at 11:00am and again at 7:00pm. Recruits trained three days a week on the sand pitch three times a day. Chiharu always made it a point to say hello and with each meeting, Sakura extracted a little piece on information.

The cadets didn't know why their training had intensified out of nowhere. But their Lieutenants were pushing them more than ever, as if preparing for something.

Sakura read Nathala's diary fiercely. She compared the maps in her diary to the ones shown in the library and there were obvious conflicts. The library's maps showed only Tomoeda. An island surrounded by sea, alone.

Nathala's showed many masses of land scattered throughout the globe. Why would Tomoeda lead them to think they were alone?

And then there was the literature section. All published literature was by scholars in the North or South and in some cases, the South. And it all praised the regime. There were no accounts of pre-regime publications. Sakura wondered if Nathala's diary was the only recorded history of pre-regime.

Sakura sighed and slid her back down the large bookshelf. Her work at the library was coming to an end. She stalled as long as she could. Her thoughts went from her father to Touya, and somehow, to Syaoran.

She hadn't seen much of him since that day she got fired and re-hired. Was he avoiding her? Was that last moment they had together too awkward. Sakura flushed thinking about it. At the same time, a small smile crept on her face. She immediately shook her head. Why was it that when Syaoran came to her mind she felt all nervous and tingly? Maybe it was better he was staying away from her. She needed to have a clear head.

As if he could hear her thoughts, he appeared before her. He was so silent she hadn't noticed him for a few seconds.

She stiffened as he walked towards her. He smiled but his eyes were heavy with tiredness.

"Hey." He said casually.

Sakura's brain stalled. "Hi." She said and began to rush to her feet. She couldn't be seen to be taking a break on the job. He held his hand out. "It's ok, you've been working hard so Suzanna tells me."

Sakura sat back down. He was wearing his light green shirt and soldiers trousers. He was less intimidating like this comparing to his full uniform.

"Do you mind if I join you?" He asked and indicated to the space beside her.

Sakura didn't expect this and just nodded. As he settled himself beside her she hugged her knees and brought them tighter to her chin. She felt his warmth immediately as he relaxed beside her.

"You don't look good." She said. She didn't know why she chose brutal honesty just then.

Syaoran laughed and pushed his cap off his head. Sakura peaked up and scanned the different texture of his hair. Shaved at the sides with longer locks at the top. She wanted to touch it.

She hugged her knees even tighter. What was with her?

"Yeah," He replied. "Work has been busy."

Sakura didn't respond. She wanted to know what this _work_ was. Was is violent? Where was it? In the South? West? But she kept silent. She wouldn't try her luck with the General's son.

Syaoran closed his eyes. He was so exhausted mentally and physically. On top of the workload he already had, Tomoyo's disappearance kept him awake most nights. She was gone two days now. No one had seen her. Syaoran dreaded to think of the worst possible scenario. Was it his fault? Should he have been there more for her? What kind of friend didn't even realize she was in a mental asylum?

It made him sick to think of. He wanted to share his fears with someone. Someone who would listen. But he couldn't. He was a Lieutenant Colonel now. There was no time to become so weak. He looked down at Sakura. She was consumed with her own thoughts.

The heaviness inside him eased. There was something about being in the library with her, this space, it made him feel at ease. Could it be… he missed her?

Out of nowhere he nudged her. Startled, she looked at him.

"Hungry?" He asked.

Sakura blinked. "Um…a little. I have lunch though-"

"Come on." He said rising to his feet. "I could use a break and some air anyway."

He held his hand out to her, she hesitated to take it. Just as he began to lower his hand, feeling rejected, she took it.

"I have to get my bag first." She said and turned before he could see her face turn completely red.

X x x

"Where is this place?" She asked as they left the base.

"Soldiers bar. They have good food. It should be empty at this time of the day."

Sakura nodded and looked around. As soon as they left base she was shocked at the beauty of the scenery. There were rows of houses with beautifully kept gardens and cars of all colours. When she asked if these were all soldiers houses Syaoran shook his head.

"Many of them may have come from wealth or have a family member in the Military. There's plenty of subsidies that come with having a family member in the military. Some were lucky enough to have settled her pre-regime."

Syaoran didn't walk ahead of her like some of the other soldiers did with their company. He walked beside her at a casual pace.

 _It's as if we're on a date._

As soon as the thought entered her head she became immediately angry at herself.

"Idiot!" She muttered in her native language.

Syaoran raised an eyebrow. "Did you say something?"

Sakura shook her head.

 _Idiot!_ She thought to herself. _Who thinks like that? You're not a high school girl._

The place was empty except one customer sitting up at the bar. The barman nodded to Syaoran. He was respected here.

Sakura took a menu and stared at it in panicked silence. The barman brought a glass of something to Syaoran and asked what they wanted. Sakura looked up at him with child-like fear. Syaoran asked for a moment.

"Is everything ok?"

Sakura glanced at the menu again and blinked. She didn't recognize anything on the menu. The letters were that of English yet she couldn't understand them.

"Um…is this English?" She asked.

Syaoran nodded.

"Then what's this?" She asked pointing to a word.

Syaoran glanced down. "It says 'espresso'."

"What is that? _Espresso._ " She repeated the word slowly.

"It's, eh…a type of strong coffee. Like an Americano."

Again, Sakura blinked. " _Ameri…cano_?"

Syaoran sat stunned. "Have you ever had a coffee before?"

Sakura shook her head. "I've heard of it. But we don't have it in the East."

Syaoran raised his eyebrow in disbelief. He read the whole menu out to her but she only recognized a few things. He suddenly felt so careless, ignorant bringing her here. It became clear to both of them that the South held far more luxuries than the East. Syaoran was very patient as he explained everything it her. In the end, she ordered a salmon and green salad. It was the only thing she was familiar with.

Afterwards he surprised her by ordering her a hot chocolate. It came with whipped cream and sprinkles and cost the equivalent of thirty dollars. These luxuries didn't come cheap. Sakura didn't know this.

She stared at it with wonder. Biting her lip she pressed her cheek to the table and looked at it from every angle. Syaoran rested his head on his hand and sipped his coffee.

 _She's so strange._ He thought and was amused that this was the same girl who would look at him with fearlessness and anger. He smiled.

"Are you going to drink it or stare at it?"

Sakura looked at him with wide eyes and said. "It's pretty. I don't want to ruin it."

Syaoran's heart went to this throat. She was so innocent and girl-like in that moment. He never imagined this side to her. With her hardened shell and sharp tongue, he had forgotten that she was, in fact, a young girl.

It made him happy, that he could witness such a rare moment with her.

Sakura felt sleepy after all the food and the hot chocolate. She would never admit it but, it was the best meal of her life.

As they were about to leave a soldier came in and asked for a moment with Syaoran.

"Wait here, I'll be back."

Sakura nodded and rubbed her eyes.

Syaoran disappeared into the back room with the other soldier. When they were alone Syaoran's face turned stony.

"Any update?" He asked.

The soldier shook his head. "I'm sorry Lieutenant Colonel. But the Princess has not been seen anywhere in the North or East. We have people everywhere looking but you know how difficult it is when we're trying to be subtle."

"And what about the West? Who's looking there?" Syaoran said with frustration creeping into his voice.

"The General…he won't give us any more resources. He says it not our top priority."

Syaoran rubbed his forehead with anger. Damn his father for not trying harder! But Syaoran knew he should take the blame. The sickening guilt was swimming in the pit of his stomach. He was Tomoyo's only friend and yet, powerless to find her.

"Even if she's in the West, we can't just barge in there. We can't interfere on Meiling's mission. If the westerners knew that the Princess might be among them, they might…they will…"

"They'll torture her." Syaoran finished. He knew this could happen.

"Sir, speaking of Lieutenant Li Meiling's mission." He said in a lower whisper.

"Yes?"

"There have been apparent sighting of…Touya Kinomoto."

Syaoran raised his eyebrow.

"Where?" Syaoran demanded.

"Everywhere sir."

"I don't understand."

"People have claimed to have seen him in the West, the East and even sir…the South."

"That's impossible. How the hell could he slip in and out of the walls so easily? Surely he would have been spotted!"

"Surely, sir. And it's driving Lieutenant Meiling over the edge. But…"

"But what?"

"But if Touya Kinomoto were to be found…then I'm sure the General would prioritize the search for the Princess. The sooner he's found, the sooner, the Princess will be." With those words, the soldier drifted his eyes out towards the bar.

Syaoran also looked this way and spotted Sakura in the distance staring in a trance at the t.v.

Syaoran shook his head. "She doesn't know anything…" He muttered. And yet there was a pinch of doubt within him. She couldn't know anything…could she? He had already concluded that.

"The Kinomoto's are very cunning, Colonel Lieutenant. Just look at Touya and her father. Maybe it's a good idea to keep some suspicion about her." He said.

Syaoran tensed. Sakura… suddenly the past hour with her seemed like it could be staged. Was her innocence and naivety faked? It didn't feel like it at the time. But the soldier was right. As soon as Touya was found, the quicker they could search for Tomoyo.

Syaoran felt torn.

Whether Sakura was acting or not, it was worth staying close to her, wasn't it?

Either way…it was going to be Touya's life for Tomoyo's.

X x x

While Sakura was waiting for Syaoran to return, she became fascinated with the t.v. blaring quietly above the bar. She hovered towards it and stood with silent awe. She had only seen one once when she was little.

 _Where was that?_ She wondered. _Was it in my house? Did we use to own one of these?_

She eyed the screen which showed the latest broadcast of the King making a public appearance somewhere in the North. She had seen his picture on Tomoedan money and on posters but she felt seeing him live was strange. He was smaller, less fierce than propaganda would have her believe.

The barman eyed her with amusement. He turned away to polish some glasses.

From the corner of the bar, Sakura was unknowingly being observed. He kept himself shielded in the corner, his head bowed low with a grey eye kept on her.

"Another, Yue?" The barman asked him.

Yue said nothing but pushed the empty glass forward, signalling it to be filled.

"Where you from, honey?" The barman asked Sakura. "I've never seen you before. Are you married to military?"

Sakura narrowed her eyes in annoyance but didn't answer. _'honey'_ She scoffed to herself.

The barman was amused by this and asked for her name. Reminding herself that she was supposed to act like a perfect citizen and assimilate, she answered. "Kinimoto Sakura." She muttered.

Those two words were enough to stop Yue from what he was doing. The glass had reached his lips but he did not drink.

…Kinomoto Sakura…

He slowly put the glass down and tuned to her direction.

 _Of course_ , he thought. How could he have not recognized her. She was just like _him_ …

Yue stiffened. He certainly didn't expect this.

The barman also shifted his mood from amused to hostile.

"You mean, the Kinomoto's from the East?" There was now an edge to his voice.

When Sakura ignored him again he turned off the t.v. and leaned against the bar with his hands. His hairy arms flexed. Sakura lowered her eyes to him and suddenly wished Syaoran would come back. The mood of the bar went downhill.

What is I am?

"Pretty brave of you to show up here, don't you think? How is that father of yours? Being good, I hope." He snickered.

Yue noticed Sakura tense up. He wondered if she'd fight back, become defensive. Was her temper like his? Just like _him_ , her eyes gave away so much more that she realized.

But she stayed silent.

"After the lies he spread, makes your job a lot harder huh, Yue?" He said and tossed his head over towards Yue.

Sakura finally noticed Yue in the corner. Her kept a passive expression on his face. He wouldn't get involved in this.

"Well, looks like we won't have to worry anyway. Seems like the General's son likes to keep an eye on rats." He said looking her up and down followed by a wheezy laugh. "Last I heard, that papa of yours was selling stuff to make a penny. Oh the mighty do fall," He wheezed again and looked to Yue for support.

Yue didn't say a word. He sipped his drink.

Sakura struggled to keep herself under control. She could handle comments against herself. But not her father. She was so frustrated. What did he know? What do any of them know about her father?

 _More than you do._ A voice mutters in her ear.

Yue saw her face pass from angry, frustration, sadness to defeated. He fought with himself whther or not to intervene.

"Is something wrong here?" Syaoran said from behind her.

When she turned around, he was staring at the barman with a stony expression.

The barman shrugged and snarled his lip up. "Nothing wrong here, except certain company maybe."

He looked down sheepishly under Syaoran's glare.

"Meaning?" Syaoran said, not letting the comment slip by.

"I'm going to get some air." Sakura muttered and left. She just needed to be away from him and the hostile atmosphere.

Syaoran stayed behind for reasons Sakura didn't want to think about.

Sakura sat on a seat outside the bar. It was a cloudy day with rain threatening to come, but it never did. She sighed. The way he spoke…as if he knew more about her father than she did. He probably does. Her father pre-takeover is something he refused to talk about.

 _What did you do that was so bad?_ She wondered. _Why won't you let me in?_

The door opened and Sakura looked up expecting Syaoran.

When Yue emerged, Sakura kept her head down. Did he come out to have a go at her too? Did he also have a comment about her father?

Yue said nothing and leaned against the wall. He plucked a cigarette from his breast pocket and lit it. Sakura felt his eyes on her. When it went on too long. Sakura huffed and stood up to face him.

"Do you have problem?" She asked.

Yue took a long drag out of his cigarette. Smoke clouded his face. The wind lazily lifted the smoke from his face. Sakura took a sharp inhale as she noticed the man staring her down was very handsome.

He was tall with a slender body. His hair was silky white and stopped at his shoulders. When she looked at him in the eye it was like the sounds around her muffled. His expression was extremely calm yet commanding.

She found herself so struck by his beauty that she had briefly forgotten her anger. The cigarette burned in his dainty fingers. Sakura thought he wouldn't answer her.

"I was just wondering." He said.

Sakura was taken aback by how soft his voice was. She leaned in to make sure she missed nothing. How did he control such a tranquillity around him, yet seem hostile?

"…About what?" She said in almost a whisper to match his voice.

Yue took another drag from his cigarette and exhaled.

"I was wondering why the daughter of a disgraced journalist and the General's son were together. Seems like a mis-match."

Sakura's face blushed slightly. She didn't know if it were because of his question or just the velvet-ness of his voice.

"What's it to you?" She asked with restraint.

Yue briefly raised an eyebrow, amused. He glanced at the door of a bar and deliberated on something.

"Be careful." He said in a darker voice that made the hairs on her neck rise. "Know which side you're on." He said.

Again, Sakura felt the mood change. There were so many follow up questions to what he said. Sakura's lips parted in shock. Was she supposed to feel threatened? Was he threatening her? Was he warning her of something. Something about Syaoran? Her father?

She went to ask but was distracted when the door behind her opened. She turned around and saw Syaoran fixing his soldiers cap on. When she turned around, the stranger had already begun to walk away.

"Are you ok?" Syaoran asked.

Sakura furrowed her brows. Was she ok? She didn't know.

"Who is that?" She asked him as the stranger began to disappear around the corner. His silver hair whipped in the wind.

Syaoran looked up. "Yue." He answered. "He's a bit of an oddball." Syaoran commented but didn't show any signs that Yue was of any significance.

"Yue…" She whispered to herself before leaving the bar.

X x x

The sun began its slow descent as Sakura and Syaoran made their way to the train station. Sakura noted that they've never spent this much time together before. Not only that, but they had naturally avoided clashing.

Now and again they would catch each other's eye for a second and look away. It was a strange atmosphere that made them both nervous.

"So…there's no coffee in the East?" He asked her.

"There's coffee, but no one can afford it. My dad got a can once as a Christmas present. It's probably gone by now."

With every question Syaoran asked he felt more and more ignorant. He knew exactly how many people in the East were possibly terrorist threats, he knew how much arms and security forces were there and the locations. He knew where the entrance of the wall began and end. But he didn't know about her, her day to day life. He was embarrassed.

"I didn't realize that much." He said.

"I guess you should come to the East more often." She said with a small smile.

"Are you ok, by the way. About the incident in the bar?"

Sakura stiffened and rubbed her shoulder. She nodded meekly. Syaoran decided not to push her about what happened.

"It's just…frustrating." She said in such a small voice that Syaoran barely heard. "When people talk about my father like that…I don't know what to say."

"You should ignore them." Syaoran advised.

"I should. But then…I just lose it. It's like a trigger switch with me. But, I can't even defend what I don't understand." She confessed. She didn't know why she was saying all of this to him. Maybe it was being with him all day made her feel more at ease.

"You don't understand?" Syaoran repeated.

Sakura looked away suddenly embarrassed. Despite the warm evening she felt a chill. "My father doesn't like to talk about the past to anyone, especially me. I was too young to remember what happened. It frustrated me how total stranger seems to know and I have to pretend to." She felt like a weight lifted from her shoulders. She had never shared those thoughts before.

"My father is not a bad person." She said defensively.

Syaoran nodded. "You don't have to convince me. I don't know what happened in the past either. I don't hold a grudge against him." He said honestly.

Syaoran felt his stomach knot. _'It's not your father I need, it's your brother.'_ He thought. He pushed those thoughts aside for now.

"You don't?" She asked suddenly feeling relieved that someone wasn't judging Fujitaka, therefore, her. Whether he was just saying that or not, Sakura didn't care.

"It's hard." He said and looked towards the sunset, the orange glow against his jaw. "Being blamed for the actions of your parents."

Those words weighted heavily on Sakura's mind. Was he empathising with her? Didn't Sakura judge him immediately just for being the son of the General? Was she any better than the man in the bar?

When they arrived at the station they both felt an unexplainable sense of sadness. They had taken this journey together before. Syaoran always walked her to the train. Most days it irritated her to be escorted but today, she regretted they arrived so soon.

"What are you doing?" She asked as he swiped his card and followed her onto the train.

"You said I should come to the East more often." He replied innocently.

He thought she'd protest. Instead she bit her lip and turned her head to hide her smile.

Everyone peaked at the Syaoran and his uniform but they didn't notice as they engaged in more conversation. As the train filled up Sakura found herself standing tight to Syaoran. It felt nice.

A thought passed through Sakura's mind. It was something she was thinking about the past couple of days.

"So…did you always want to be a Lieutenant?"

Syaoran smiled. Every time he did she felt herself smile a smaller one. "There was no choice. I was born in to it."

"And, you're going to be the General one day." She said and looked up. Their faces were very close. "I mean, that's how it works right?"

This question threw Syaoran off. His jaw hardened and his eyes flickered towards the window. Sakura wondered if she had ruined the light atmosphere and for a moment she thought he wouldn't answer.

"Everyone has a duty to their parents. I'm no different." A dark expression took over Syaoran's face. Sakura knew he had gone into his own thoughts somewhere far away. In that moment Sakura wondered if they really were that different. Wasn't Sakura also, in a way, trying to recapture her father' lost passion?

"I'm sorry." She whispered, which seemed to bring him back to the present. "I'm prying, again."

Syaoran waved it off.

"And, thank you. For today. As someone who makes it a point not to enjoy anything…I had fun." She tried to make it a compliment as best she could. She even gave a small smile to seal the compliment.

"Any time." He replied softly.

They didn't look away from each other. Something shifted and the atmosphere became intense. Despite all the people on the train they unashamedly turned their bodies towards each other. Syaoran looked down at her soft white skin, the vulnerability in her eyes. Sakura felt an insatiable urge to touch him, for him to touch her and-

 _'_ _Ladies and Gentlemen, the next stop is Conan Square. If you wish to transfer to the rapid train bound for Tomoeda South, please exit here.'_

They pulled away from each other and exited. This is where Syaoran should depart back to the South. The East wasn't really the place for him. And yet they stood on the platform facing each other. They couldn't ignore the burning feeling inside them all day.

"Walk me home." Sakura said.

It was meant to be a request but came out as a demand.

"I mean-"

"Ok." He said before she could change her mind.

They walked in silence and Sakura felt more nervous with every step. The night had descended now and most people were already in their homes. Her street was empty.

 _What are I doing? Making him walk home with me..?_

Sakura gripped the handle of her bag even tighter.

She could see the gates to her home. Her father had left this morning and there were no comforting lights left on in the house. She had forgotten that she'd be alone for the next few days. They stopped at her gates and looked at the house.

"My father is out of town from the next few days." She explained as to why the house was so silent.

Syaoran nodded and met her eyes. Her lips parted and she brushed her fringe out of her eyes with her fingers.

"Thank you for letting me walk you home." He said. But he didn't make any motion to leave. Sakura wondered if he was looking for parting words from her but she couldn't bring herself to do it. She didn't want him to leave. Th voice of reason, the bitter, cynical pessimist in her was nowhere to be seen, she was on her own.

"The documents." Sakura said suddenly which threw him. "The...the documents you asked for two weeks ago. I can give you them now." She whirled around and fiddled with the gate. She signalled for him to follow her.

They entered her house and she switched the dim hallway light on. They stood in the hall basked under the dim light. "I'll get them." She said and disappeared upstairs into her room.

He heart was pulsing furiously. "What the fuck are you doing?" She muttered to herself. "What do you actually think is going to happen? What do you _want_ to happen?" She threw her head into her hands and blew out hot air.

 _Idiot. You complete idiot. Bringing him here…expecting something…maybe I picked everything up wrong. Maybe he's just being polite._

She made her way to her bookshelf and scanned through the bookshelf. She at least had to find those files. Otherwise he'll think she's completely lost it.

She heard a creak behind her. Slowly, she turned her head and found Syaoran standing in her doorway. He was so tall and in some sense, intimidating. This released butterflies in her stomach. For him to be here…almost in her room, just the two of them…Her heart flew again. She turned back towards the bookshelf. "I'm sorry…I can't find them. I must have misplaced them." She said in a low, meek voice.

Her fingers were rattling with nerves. She couldn't control them. Then, out of nowhere, he placed his hand over hers. Her fingers ceased to shake. A blush made its way across her face. He was behind her, his arm above her shoulder, his body against her back. Then his lips came to her ear and said.

"Your father sent them to me weeks ago."

The low huskiness of his voice stirred something in her groin. She stopped trembling and felt a new confidence grow. The corners of her lips tucked up as she slowly turned towards him. The soft glow of the lamp lit up his burning amber eyes. His arm was still above her, he had removed his cap and a few strands of hair fell forward. Sakura curled her body slightly and cocked her head to the side.

Syaoran felt a desire burn within him stronger than ever. He needed her in that moment. The small gap between their bodies was driving him crazy.

"Well then…" She said and pressed a finger to her bottom lip. "What should we do now?"

In that moment Sakura felt her body being thrown against the bookshelf as Syaoran's lips crashed down on hers. She finally wrapped her fingers in his hair, feeling the different textures. They were hungry for each other and their body heat burned up.

They rolled away from the bookshelf still in a hunger-fuelled embrace. Sakura felt the small of her back hit her desk. In one swift move Syaoran hoisted her onto it and ran his hand up her leg. She unbuttoned his shirt and felt his bare chest against her palm. The built up tension over the weeks between them was realising itself in an animal way.

He grabbed the back of her hair and kissed her deeply. He unbuttoned her dress and pushed it over her shoulders. The contact of skin on skin was electric. She ran her hand over his bare back as he un-did her bra.

Sakura threw her arms around his neck and wrapped herself around him. Her clothes had bundled at her waist. They groaned together as she rocked her hips against his. Her sweet smell and taste was intoxicating him until he could no longer take it. He swept her up from the desk and she curled her legs around his waist.

They fell onto the bed and gave way to their passion. And for now…just for now…they would not think of the consequences it would bring…

X x x

Sakura splashed her face with cold water.

She let it take some heat from her face as the hard light of realization struck her. She grabbed the sink with both hands and looked at her flustered self in the mirror.

 _You fool._ She cursed at herself. _You absolute fool._

The cynical sceptical part in her came waltzing back out of nowhere with a look of utter disgust. For a moment Sakura thought the last twenty-four hours were merely a dream. Was it her who felt all those pathetic butterflies, who swooned like a child because a man bought her lunch.

She glared at herself. _Pathetic!_

And yet…pathetic as it was…did she regret it?

She slept with the enemy. She literally, slept with the enemy.

Sakura had been in the bathroom long enough now. She had to face him now.

She opened the door to find he was almost dressed. He laced up his boot and when he stood up, his face reflected hers. What was it? Regret? Shame? Political?

Sakura crossed her arms in her short blue silk nightdress. There was no point in finding appropriate clothing after what they did. Neither of them knew how to react, what to say for fear the other didn't feel the same way. What if one had regrets and the other didn't? Or vice versa?

Sakura began to open her mouth to say something.

"Are you on the pill?" He asked.

Sakura's mouth snapped shut. Did he seriously ask that? What that all he was thinking?

"Yes." She said irritated. "I've IUD." All women had, of course. You didn't opt into birth control, you opted out and were only eligible if you were married. Tomoeda was too small to be over populated.

Of course, Syaoran knew all of this anyway. He didn't know why he asked. He had to say something. He didn't know how to feel about all of this. Up until a week ago, he was spying on her, she was a suspected enemy. Now, he was after Touya. It didn't sit right with him to sleep with her.

He rubbed his temples and breathed out. He was annoyed at himself for not handling this well. Sakura interpreted it as frustration with her.

Just like being startled from a pleasant dream, Sakura felt reality crash down on her. And with that, her old self. She could feel herself begin to clam up, a tightness in her muscles.

"You should go." She said and turned away from her.

"Sakura." He said in a defeated way.

"Make sure no one sees you on your way out. I can't have anyone knowing about this." With that, she stabbed a green eye at him.

Syaoran knew there was no getting through to her now. The defensive Sakura had returned. He grabbed his cap and went to leave. Just before he did he stopped behind her. She would not turn around to meet his gaze. He looked down at her tousled hair. A bare white shoulder was visible under her night dress. He raised his hand to touch her bare skin.

She sensed it but didn't move. She wanted him to touch her. She wanted to feel his fingertips brush her skin. But they didn't.

Syaoran turned and left.

Sakura heard his footsteps as he went down the stairs. Not until she heard the front door close did she relax her shoulders. She felt heavy and moved to the bed. She lay there as her conscience fought with itself.

Ironically, on the shelf above her bed where she had just slept with Syaoran, Nathala's diary poked a corner over, watching her, questioning her loyalty. Sakura breathed deeply and before she fell asleep she recalled Yue's words from earlier.

 _Be careful…know which side you're on…_

X x x

 **I hope you like the direction this fanfic is going. :) I was happy to finally bring Yue into this!**

Syaoran looks around before disappearing into the night like a ghost.

Inside the house, nothing stirs, as if nothing had taken place.

Yue sits in his car across from Sakura's house and mulls over what he witnessed. He never expected this to happen. He lifts out a cigarette and taps it against his lips. He decides against it and instead pulls out his phone.

He hesitates slightly, something Yue rarely does, then pushes the call button.

It rings only twice before she answers it.

"This better be an emergency for you to call me." There is no warmth in her voice. He was not surprised. He only ever called when bad shit was going to happen.

"There has been an…interesting development." He said.

"What is it?" She said losing her patience. A phone call to her was too risky to be vague.

He explained the unusual closeness between Sakura and the General's son. He omitted the part about the seeming the possible affair they were having. He didn't think that would go down well.

She listened patiently until he was finished. "I see…" She said. He couldn't detect if she was annoyed by this development.

"Do you want me to get involved?" Yue asked. "I could have a word with her-"

"No." She replied. "No, the agreement was, she has to come to us. We cannot interfere. That's what was agreed."

Yue was irritated by her response but he did not argue with her.

"Anyway, we need you of all people to stay under the radar Yue. You're too valuable to us."

Yue glanced back at the house. For a moment, he thought he could see Sakura's silhouette from behind the curtain before it passed by.

"Yes ma'am." He said.

"Yue. Don't interfere, but don't let her slip off your radar either. This all might work out in our favour."

Yue smirked. "Yes, ma'am."

He hung up the phone and looked back at Sakura's house.

"Pick a side, little girl." He purred. "Pick a side."

X x x


	10. Paka Paka

**Enjoy!**

There is a burst of applause so loud as his speech comes to a fiery end.

Despite the glorious praise he was getting, he managed to keep his face modest. Half the people stood up and howled with a passion that frightened Eriol. The community hall had never been as full as it was tonight. Some came due to routine, others just out of curiosity.

Eriol sat at the end of the long table and watched on as Touya's speech came to a close. Eriol felt a stab of fear every time the words _'rebel', 'by our own means' or 'aggressive force'_ was greeted by nodding heads and claps.

Eriol had underestimated Touya's powers of persuasion. For someone who could be so rough and so brutal, he knew how to charm an audience. He pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed. He didn't know what he was to do. Touya kept his word, he got the prisoners back and then some. But at what cost?

"Before I leave you tonight, I want to inform anyone who shares my beliefs to meet here at dawn for recruitment training. No matter whose side you're on, West Tomoeda must know how to defend itself. When the South come for us, we cannot allow them to take us so easily."

Then Touya's eyes found Eriols and with a smirk he said. "The time for talks and negotiations are coming to an end."

This infuriated Eriol. Half the crowd where still cheering when Eriol bolted upright and began to leave. A hand clamped down on his arm.

"Where are you going?" His mother asked. "You can't leave, this is an open council meeting, you can't leave."

"I've had enough of this shit." He said and went to leave again.

"Eriol, if you leave then you're basically giving up your status here. They need to know you're still someone in charge here-"

"There's no getting through to anyone here tonight. They're all drunk on his shit talk about getting an army together. His support will die out."

"Eriol, you know that's a lie! He has weapons. If this is not managed properly-"

"You support him, don't you?" Eriol fumed, although he already knew the answer. His mother of course supported Touya. She just didn't want it to be Touya to lead a weaponized army.

"Why won't you just join forces Eriol! He is right! You seen what they did to our people in the asylum, mental, physical torture. Of course everyone is angry. Of course they want blood. Why can't you see that your way isn't working anymore!?" She shouted. She couldn't understand why Eriol remained so reserved, why he was determined to keep everything non-violent when it could never stay that way, not the way things were going now.

Eriol was angry, but his face remained smooth, giving away no emotion. How could she possibly not think he, to some degree, didn't feel the same? When Touya brought the prisoners back from the asylum, the damage on their faces was enough to turn his stomach.

He wanted blood too. He wanted to kill every last soldier and royal in Tomoeda. How could anyone not think he would? But it would be too easy to sink into bloodshed. He had to, for her sake, resist the temptation to kill.

Eriol looked up at the impassioned crowd. There were lines forming to sign up for Touya's recruitment 'training'.

 _Bullshit_ , Eriol thought. Touya disguised it as a 'precaution'. But Eriol knew, after the attack on the King, Touya would plan out more extreme attacks, kill more people senselessly. But there was another reason Eriol wouldn't go through with this. He wouldn't confide in his mother.

One thing was for sure, there celebrations would be short lived. Somewhere in the South, Meiling was hatching a scheme.

X x x

Eriol let the front door close behind him with a light thud.

The house was silent, as it always was, lit up only by the silver moonlight spilling into the living room.

He sighed heavily. There was something odd. He looked to the coffee table which had two glasses and a deck of cards. The sink had a few unwashed dishes and to his surprise, the back door was unlocked. Usually the house was immaculate.

He listened again but the house did not stir. He wondered if his mother came to visit in his absence, but being the woman she was, she'd never leave the house with anything out of place. He ascended the stairs. It creaked beneath his feet, giving away how old this house was. When he opened the door to his bedroom his eyes landed on her and became heavier.

He made his way over to her and sat beside her lightly as to not wake her. He grazed her cheek with the back of his finger. Her face was its usual sickly pale. Her eyes seemed to sink deeper into her skull with each passing day. Her small chest rose up and down as she slept. He placed his hand on her thinning hair, which was once thick and luscious. She was getting worse, and the more support Touya got, the chances of her surviving got slimmer.

He picked up the small bottle of medicine on her bedside locker and rattled it. There wasn't much left. After everything that's happened, he doubted Meiling would keep up her part of the agreement.

It was a sly deal. Even he could admit that to himself. He promised Meiling to keep non-violent negotiations open between the West and the South. In exchange, Meiling would supply him with medicine from Ruby. Of course, she'd only give the bare minimum, never enough to make a massive impact. Just enough to take her pain away. Expensive medicine, apparently, reserved only for the top hospitals in North Tomoeda. But free to Eriol, as long as he kept up his side of the bargain. It all worked perfectly.

Until Touya came. And with the attacks on the King, Meiling was withholding Ruby's medicine.

Eriol's head whipped up when he heard a small crash coming from the kitchen. He looked down at Ruby and saw that she had not stirred. Eriol grabbed a knife by the locker and shut the bedroom door gently behind him.

Another small crash came from the kitchen followed by a low murmur. Someone had broken in, he thought. He held onto his knife tightly and peered down the staircase. The kitchen light suddenly flickered on to his surprise. As he made his way into the kitchen he saw two bare feet poking from behind the island.

Eriol tilted his head in confusion. The intruder was mumbling to themselves in a low voice. Deciding to skip the anticipation part, Eriol bolted around to face them. The intruder jerked their head up and dropped the sponge they were holding into the bucket.

A scream caught in her throat when she saw Eriol hovering above her with confusion on his face.

"Who are you?" He asked and lowered his knife. He knew immediately that she was no danger.

The girl, whose dark hair was cut crookedly to her shoulders looked up at him with big, ice blue eyes. She sat on her heels and looked up at him in bewilderment. She wiped her hands on her dirtied apron and rose to her feet with shaky knees. Eriol was surprised at how tall she was, maybe only two inches shorter than he was.

She looked at him in the most peculiar way, like she was waiting for him to recognize him. She smiled shyly and tucked a short piece of hair behind her ear.

"I'm…. Madison."

X x x

 _Earlier that day…_

Tomoyo was feeling a flurry of emotions.

There was fear, anxiety, worry but above all, excitement.

She and the other asylum survivors were being vetted and treated by representatives of the West. She kept quiet and tried to remember everything Madison told her at the asylum. She couldn't let anything slip and give herself away, especially not here.

She had to stick to her story. She was Madison Takao. Her family came from the East. Her sister assaulted by a soldier but her story failed to succeed in court and as a result, she was in prison. Her father had died by the hands of soldiers. She was twenty. She told her part about her family with particular rage and emotion. It must be working, as it gained the sympathy of everyone, especially the rebels.

She groaned. Her back still ached from the shot wound.

For fear of being identified, Tomoyo made a hasty decision. One of the female rebels gave her a knife and in one quick slash she cut her luscious hair which everyone recognized her for in the North. Her hair now hung jagged and uneven at her shoulders. She fingered the leftover locks and felt as if she had just slashed away Tomoyo Daidouji. It was oddly refreshing. A new her, she thought.

A few things Tomoyo wasn't catching onto quick was her name change.

 _Madison_. She snarled her lip in distain. Why that name of all names? It took her a few seconds to register when people called her. She responded by saying she was still shaken by the recent events. That gained her even more brownie points.

Other things she wasn't particularly pleased by were the clothes. Whatever material the clothes they wore were extremely itchy and irritated her skin. And they were all brown or grey. She had never seen such a bland mixture of clothes all thrown into the same place. She suddenly had a deep appreciation for the fine silk of her gowns and the richness in colour they had.

And of course, so many people were barefoot. It seemed so…animalistic to her. The westerners in charge apologized about this and said there was a shortage of clothes for the mean time.

But despite all of this, the people themselves threw Tomoyo into a great sadness. They were broken people who had seen so many things. Children had lost parents, parents had children who were missing. There was a mixture of relief to have escaped the asylum, but also a sense of great loss.

 _'_ _Attention please'_ said a voice over the monitor. _'We would like to ask any survivors to please report to the assembly hall for relocation. Thank you.'_

Tomoyo looked around and saw people getting up and move.

"What's happening?" Tomoyo asked a woman beside her.

The woman rubbed her tired eyes and said. "The Military have offered to locate anyone from the East and return them there. If you want to believe that."

"But why? They'll just put everyone back into the aslylum."

She shrugged again. "Something must have changed. I thought for sure they'd roll up and open fire. But they must be looking for someone. Maybe."

Tomoyo felt a sudden urged of panic. She wondered if the Military would know her face immediately. Some of them had seen her without her veil. She felt a sudden urge to run. She couldn't return. Not when she just got there.

"You know, if you don't _feel_ like going back. You could just…" Then the woman nodded towards where a smaller group were heading to.

Tomoyo raised an eyebrow.

"Some people aren't too eager to return to the East. If you feel the same, you should go with them."

Tomoyo caught on quickly to her meaning and hastily stood up, her back burned from the pain. She staggered off towards the smaller group until they came to a small warehouse.

She just made it in before the metal door slammed behind her. There was a single large window allowing light to flood in. Everyone waited anxiously for someone to address them until finally someone stood up on the small platform, and Tomoyo's heart briefly stopped.

The weeks of her dreaming and fantasizing did no justice to his actual image. He was as tall as she remembered and even from that far back Tomoyo could tell his eyes were a deep, warm sapphire.

She felt her face break out into a wide smile and her eyes sting. She didn't know why she felt like crying, it brought back memories of that day at the King's speech in West Tomoeda. She suddenly wondered if he would remember her, then dismissed the thought as soon as it came. How would he remember?

"I'll make this short." Eriol began. "Welcome back. I understand what you went through was horrendous and now is a time to be with your family. But due to Military intervention, our food shortage has reached an all-time low, as of next week we really need those of you capable, to go back to work."

Tomoyo became entranced with his deep, soft voice. She barely took in anything he said.

"As for the Military, they won't take this lightly. To avoid any more arrests please keep a low profile and if possible, stay out of the main villages. If you have family up in the mountains who can take you in, I advise you go to them."

Then his face became stern. Tomoyo thought she could see his jaw lock.

"For those of you who are…new, while we welcome you, you should know that in order to stay here, you have to earn your keep. Things work differently in the West." For a brief second she thought he made eye contact with her.

She suddenly felt like a fraud amongst the crowd. But to see him again, it was worth the ordeal she went through. Eriol left the podium and a woman stepped up.

"Ok, we have open positions for work. If everyone will please line up behind the table over there..."

Tomoyo had stopped listening. She scanned the crowd for Eriol but couldn't find him. From behind her she heard a couple of snickers.

Tomoyo looked behind her and saw two girls around her age smirking at her.

"Can you be more obvious?" Said the red-headed one.

"What?"

"Please, the _swoon_ on your face is obvious to everyone. At least try to be subtle."

"Oh, give her a break." Said the smaller, blond one. "It's not like none of us have drooled over Eriol Hiiragazawa."

 _Eriol Hiiragazawa._ Tomoyo repeated the name over and over again in her mind.

"Let me save you the heartbreak, sweetie." The red headed one repeated. "He's not interested in you."

Tomoyo placed her hands on her hip and in two strides she was inches from the red-heads face. The red head backed against the wall, surprised at Tomoyo's towering height.

Tomoyo cocked her head to the side and purred. "Oh, and why is that? You think I can't have him?" Tomoyo felt the familiar swell of confidence grow inside her.

"Um…no." The red head stammered. "He's off limits, to everyone." The she nodded behind Tomoyo. Tomoyo followed her gaze until her eyes found Eriol. But he was not alone.

He walked away from the crowd and stopped in front of a girl. At least Tomoyo thought it was a girl until she saw her face was around the same age as her. Eriol placed a strong arm around the small woman and placed his hand affectionately on her cheek.

Tomoyo felt the colour drain from her face.

"Yeah," The red head said. "They've been married since seventeen. Nothing's splitting them up. Believe me, you're not the first girl to fantasise about it."

Tomoyo stood there with her mouth in a small 'o'. She didn't believe what she was seeing. As if to cement it together, Eriol planted a small kiss on the girls lips and smiled softly.

Tomoyo felt a sting of jealousy burn in her chest. It was strange, because Tomoyo had never felt jealousy or envy for a man before, especially for one she's never even spoken to.

Tomoyo watched them talk, he still held her delicately until suddenly, she coughed once, then bent over in a small, quiet fit. He whispered something into her ear and walked her out via the back door. What was that about? She wondered.

"Ugh, Ruby." The smaller girl said. "Always with the sick act, no wonder she's got him wound tighty around her finger. Pathetic." She rolled her eyes and escaped with the red head.

As they walked away Tomoyo felt a sadness grow in the pit of her stomach.

Eriol was married. That was something she didn't see coming.

"Madison, isn't it?" A voice asked from behind her.

It took Tomoyo a few second to realize her was talking to her.

"Oh. Yes. That's me." She said in a tired voice.

She looked up to see a familiar face but couldn't remember from where. He was the man with the bronze skin and dark brown eyes.

"Touya." He said as if reading her mind.

Tomoyo nodded and crossed her arms. When she ended up in the West at first, Touya was the first in command. However, something about him made her uncomfortable. Maybe it was the judgment in his eyes. When he peered down at her she shifted uncomfortably as if she were on trial. Was he waiting for her to slip up?

"I see you haven't enrolled for a job yet." He said, not blinking. His voice was soft, friendly even.

Tomoyo made a face and flicked her hair back. "I'm not into 'work'." She said. The thoughts of her holding a broom or doing manual labour on a farm left a bad taste in her mouth.

"The you'll have a difficult time here." He said not backing down.

Tomoyo looked at him over the shoulder and flashed an innocent, yet flirtatious smile and said, "Are you going to make it difficult for me?"

Touya stared at her for a second, unamused. She didn't back down.

"I wouldn't dream of it." He replied.

"Then you should mind your own fucking business." She said in a sweet smile that conflicted with his words.

Touya observed her. She was beautiful. But not his type. He then smiled. He liked her, he liked her defiance. Unlike many of the women in the village, she would not be spoken down to. He could use her in the future.

Tomoyo's lost interest in Touya and her eyes looked past his shoulders and fixated on something. Touya turned around and coped what had her so fixated.

"You know he's married, right?"

Tomoyo rolled her eyes. "Yes, everyone seems to have told me." Tomoyo was not embarrassed to have been caught looking. She was more intrigued about Eriol's personal life.

A small plan hatched in Touya's mind at that moment. He smiled down at Tomoyo and said. "I think we can help each other out."

Tomoyo raised an eyebrow. "I'm new here, what could I possibly do for you?"

Ignoring her, Touya beckoned someone over. Tomoyo turned to see and elderly woman approaching. She had her arms crossed and a displeased look on her face. She was not happy to be summoned by Touya.

"Something I can help you with Touya?" She said with a tight smile.

Tomoyo shifted under the uncomfortable atmosphere.

"No, actually I may have something for you, Mrs Hiiragazawa." He replied and placed his arm on Tomoyo's shoulder. "This is Madison, she has no job at the moment. I was wondering-"

"No." She said curtly. "Is that all?"

"She's new." He said with a charming smile that didn't reach his eyes. "We can't have her wandering around."

"Put her to farm work." She and stabbed her eyes on Tomoyo.

Tomoyo burst into a fit of laughter. The thoughts of her dirtying her feet and hands in the name of work was so ridiculous to her, she assumed it was a joke. The woman didn't laugh.

"If that doesn't suit you, you can go back to where you came from."

Tomoyo stopped laughing.

"She has a point, though." Touya said coming to her defence. He grabbed Tomoyo's wrist. "Look at these hands, she's never seen hard labour in her life. Do you really need her slowing down progress? Especially now when we're trying to produce more now than ever? She'll only be a burden."

Mrs Hiiragazawa looked at Tomoyo's soft palms with disapproval. "I bet not even the Queens hands are this pampered." She snarled.

Tomoyo's heart flipped as an image of her mother suddenly appeared in front of her. A pang of guilt weighed at the bottom of her stomach. What was her mother doing now? Was she worried? Panicked about her missing daughter? Or did she even notice? Care?

Mrs Hiiragazawa sighed heavily and weighed up her options.

"I've heard your last maid bailed. This is only temporary." Touya said and placed an arm around Tomoyo as if they were good friends.

"You know we've went through twenty maids alone this year. I doubt this one will last two days." She said eyeing up Tomoyo's dainty frame.

"Only one way to find out." Touya pushed Tomoyo forward.

The woman frowned as she looked Tomoyo up and down. She thought to herself for a minute. "She's tall, she'll be able to reach the dust on the top shelf." She muttered. "She can try. But given how Ruby can be… let's see how it goes."

Tomoyo clamped her mouth shut to stop herself from asking about Ruby. Was she going to meet her? Meet Eriol? Tomoyo felt giddy but didn't ask any more question about the job, she didn't want to blow it.

Before Tomoyo and Mrs Hiiragazawa left she looked back at Touya. She contemplated thanking him for helping her out. But decided against it.

 _Nah_ , she thought. _Fuck him, creep_.

As Tomoyo walked away Touya stroked his chin. He would keep an eye on Madison, she could prove extremely useful in the future.

X x x

"Madison, isn't it?" Mrs Hiiragazawa asked.

Tomoyo nodded and looked at some children who were kicking round a deflated ball with battered shoes. They were walking away from the main village down a dirt path surrounded by trees.

"Well, listen, Madison. I won't bother explaining everything because I doubt you'll last a day."

"How kind." She replied sweetly which earned her a glare. "What exactly am I supposed to be doing here?"

The woman suppressed an annoyed face. "My daughter in law hasn't been feeling well lately and a result, she needs someone to assist her around the house."

"So, you want me to be a maid?" Tomoyo said with disgust on her face.

"If you don't like it you can do hard labour instead."

Tomoyo said nothing more.

They made their way up to a house which was obviously larger than the ones in the villages. It was old and wooden with a cosy porch outside the front door. The woman rattled a few keys and let them in.

The first thing Tomoyo noticed is that the house was immaculate. She was impressed.

"Wait here." She said and left Tomoyo in the living room.

Tomoyo did as she was told. She eyed up the living room and noticed there were no pictures.

"You can come out now." Mrs Hiiragazawa said.

Tomoyo followed her outside to the stunning scenery that grabbed her attention for a while.

"Ruby, this is Madison. She's going to be helping you out for the next few days."

Tomoyo pried her eyes away from the stunning scenery and settled on Ruby. Tomoyo slightly gasped and took a step back. The woman sitting in the chair was a shadow of the person Tomoyo saw earlier. This woman here was sunken so deep into the wooden chair, Tomoyo thought she was trying to become part of it.

Her eyes were shut and she rested her head into her palm. Tomoyo couldn't tell if she were sleeping or if she were dead. She lifted her head with much effort. Opening her eyes, she winced in the evening sunlight and found Tomoyo.

Tomoyo's face dropped.

She looked so weak and ill, Tomoyo thought she couldn't possibly be the same woman she saw earlier. She found it even more difficult to comprehend that she was Eriol's wife.

"Seriously?" Ruby said in a tired voice.

"I know, but it's only until I find a replacement. I'm sorry I can't stick around and help, I'm needed in the village." Mrs Hiiragazawa said and patted Ruby's small hand.

Ruby smiled weakly and nodded but then narrowed her eyes at Tomoyo.

"Ok, I'll leave you two then. Madison."

"Yes?"

"It's just one day, don't mess anything up." She warned.

Mrs Hiiragazawa left and an awkward silence settled between them.

"So…" Tomoyo began.

"I don't need your small talk." Ruby said without opening her eyes.

Tomoyo blew hot air out of her cheeks and flopped on the chair beside Ruby. The loud thud irritated her into waking up.

"What are you doing?" Ruby asked getting more annoyed.

Tomoyo blinked and shrugged. "I'm…keeping you company."

Ruby looked at her in annoyed disbelief. "I don't need company. Go and do work of something. I don't care what just leave me alone." She huffed.

Tomoyo turned her head to ask what her problem was but snapped it shut. Tomoyo had to remember her place. She was not a princess here, she was a newcomer. She had no status in West Tomoeda, not unless she wanted to get killed.

Looking at Ruby, Tomoyo felt uncomfortable. Ruby seemed to sink further into the chair as the seconds passed. Tomoyo wondered how Eriol could be married to her. Tomoyo felt the sting of envy again. Rather than stew in it, she decided to return to the house.

She recalled what Mrs. Hiiragazawa said about Ruby's impatience for the maids. Tomoyo knew if she wanted to avoid doing hard labour, she'd have to at least pretend she was working. She made her way into the kitchen and glanced around at the spotless counter tops. It then occurred to Tomoyo that she had never cleaned or made a meal in her life.

She opened a cupboard and pulled out a frying pan and knocked over several stacked dishes. A large clash echoed throughout the house.

"What are you doing?" Ruby mumbles, suddenly appearing in the doorway with a scowl on her face. Tomoyo thought she looked completely different from the innocent woman she saw hand in hand with Eriol this morning.

Tomoyo looked down at the broken dishes and shrugged. "Cooking." Tomoyo said with a small smirk.

Ruby's face twisted with annoyance. "You've never even done this before, have you? Why are you even here? You're just like the other empty headed idiots who come here just for my husband right? You think if you act all sweet pretending to help that he'll-" Ruby's rant was cut off as she descended into a violent fit of coughing.

Tomoyo flinched at the wheeziness of her lungs as Ruby struggled to regain control of her breath.

Tomoyo looked around awkwardly and waited for Ruby's coughing fit to pass. Ruby's knees gave way and Tomoyo by instinct reached out and caught her before she landed face first onto the ground.

Tomoyo lifted her onto a nearby chair. Ruby's arms were so thin Tomoyo thought she could feel the bone through her thin dress. Kneeling before her, Tomoyo watched as Ruby took deeps breaths to calm herself down.

 _Don't die on me please._ Tomoyo thought. _That's too much for me to handle in one day._

Ruby's breathing relaxed and she slumped back onto the chair and leaned her head into her palm. Only then did Tomoyo feel something wet in her palm. She looked down and saw specs of blood. Glancing back at Ruby she noticed more dabs of blood stuck to the corner of her mouth.

"Shit." Tomoyo mumbled. "You need to go to a hospital." She said and grabbed some tissues nearby.

Ruby swiped the tissue out of her hand and wiped the blood from her mouth. "A hospital." Ruby scoffed. "Is that your idea of being funny? Unless you have golden keys to waltz us past the Western walls, there ain't a hospital around here."

Tomoyo sat in an opposite chair and crossed her arms. Beads of sweat formed on Ruby's forehead. Tomoyo grabbed a cloth that happened to be sitting on the kitchen counter and dabbed Ruby's forehead. Tomoyo didn't know if she was doing it right, it was something Layla use to do for her when Tomoyo was sick or coming down from a high, or having serious drug-related withdrawals. It never helped really, but it made her feel comforted. Ruby swatted her hand away, but it was so weak it may as well have been a butterfly fluttering against her hand.

"I don't need your help." She croaked.

Silence passed between them until Tomoyo felt the need to fill the void.

"You're really sick, aren't you?"

Ruby attempted a laugh but that sent her into another small coughing fit. "Haven't you heard? I thought everyone knew about Eriol's sick, useless wife." She said bitterly.

"What's wrong with you?" Tomoyo asked.

Ruby scowled at her. Tomoyo was being too familiar with Ruby, Ruby didn't like it but indulged her anyway. "I don't know. Nobody does. My mother-in-law thinks it's a disease from the outside world."

"Outside world?" Tomoyo asked.

"From beyond and of the walls."

"Like, from the sea?"

"No, you idiot." Ruby said. Ruby was too exhausted to explain to Tomoyo. "From the sea." She muttered to herself. "You were pretty pampered over in the East weren't you?"

They once again fell into awkward silence. In the kitchen, broken glass was littered everywhere. Anxiety took a hold of Tomoyo. She had already fucked up this job. Ruby was sure to fire her and Tomoyo would either have to do hard labour to pay her way, or find a way out of the West. Tomoyo glanced back at Ruby, who was staring out at the stunning sunset through the glass door. Yet her face held a deep sadness.

Tomoyo saw softness in Ruby's hazel eyes. She had high cheekbones and a small, cute nose. Tomoyo imagined for a moment that her skin was plumper, that her hair was thicker, a time before whatever sickness took hold of Ruby. For a moment it was easy to imagine that at one point Ruby was a pretty thing, beautiful even. She could maybe understand what attracted Eriol to her.

Speaking of which. Tomoyo looked around at the front door and remembered the other reason she wanted this job. She wanted to see Eriol again. She was unashamed to admit that to herself. She tried to imagine what Eriol and Ruby's life was like together. Did he come home and greet her with a kiss? Did they sit down together and discuss their day? Did hey dwell over Ruby's sickness? How bad was her sickness even? Was she dying?

Then her eyes landed on a deck of cards in the middle of a small table. Tomoyo instinctively picked them up and began to shuffle them expertly in her hands.

Ruby lifted her head and watched Tomoyo flawlessly shuffle the cards.

"You…play?" Ruby asked.

Tomoyo stopped shuffling and nodded.

Ruby nodded towards the small table. Tomoyo pulled it over to her.

"What games do you know?" Ruby asked.

"All of them." Tomoyo said with a confident flick of her. Back when Tomoyo was allowed to socialize more freely, she often played card games with friends and even elders. Her father's friends always complimented Tomoyo's cunning skills with any card game. She never lost. It was the only thing Tomoyo felt she could do with absolute confidence.

"You hardly know all of them." Ruby scoffed.

"Try me, you choose."

"Paka paka." Ruby challenged.

"You can play _paka paka_?" Tomoyo said raising her eyebrow. Paka Paka was one of the hardest games that required two decks of cards, the ability to count cards and scheme well.

Ruby laughed. "Of course I do, it was invented here. I'm surprised the East even have it."

Tomoyo couldn't think of a witty response. She had always thought Paka Paka was a Northern game. It had never occurred to her that it originated from the West. Tomoyo had a flashing images of her mother enjoying a game of Paka Paka whilst tipsy on wine with her high class friends. With her mother's constant belittling of the West she wondered if the Queen knew she was partaking in a Western tradition.

Tomoyo dealt the cards and they proceeded to play for two hours.

"Ha!" Tomoyo said in victory. "Paka paka." She threw down her winning cards and celebrated her third win against Ruby.

Ruby made an annoyed sound and tossed her cards into the pile. Ruby squeezed the temples on her nose and laughed softly.

"You're good." She said and nodded to herself. "You didn't let me win."

Tomoyo saw her face relax as they were playing. "You think cause you're sick I'm going to let you beat _me_?" Tomoyo said and neatly folded the cars back into a deck.

Ruby scoffed at Tomoyo's brassiness again but didn't scowl her for her insensitivity. Ruby folded her arms and glanced out at the darkening sky. Whilst playing with Ruby she had forgotten to look out for Eriol.

"You know, you're a useless maid." Ruby commented.

"I take that as a compliment." Tomoyo said and pretended to be unfazed. Tomoyo feared she'd be maid number twenty-one to be fired.

"You can't cook, clean and you certainly don't know anything about taking care of others. I could swear you came straight out of the Northern palace."

Tomoyo's heartbeat escalated when she mentioned the palace. Was she so easy to see through?

"But, I guess the East and West are very different places. I didn't expect much from you at the start anyway."

"Is this you just being a sore loser? You were the one who wanted to play." Tomoyo and twirled a long strand of lavender hair around her finger.

Ruby looked at her. "You're arrogant." She said with a frown. "You irreverent, you show no sensitivity towards my illness and you're a useless maid."

"You've mentioned that last one already."

Ruby closed her eyes leaned back in the chair. "Come back tomorrow." She said.

Tomoyo blinked twice and wondered if she was hearing things. "You want me to come back? I'm not fired like all those other maids?"

"As much as I hate to admit it, Madison, playing cards with you was…fun. Your personality, the way you are, you're different from the other maids." Ruby opened her eyes and caught Tomoyo's. "In fact, you're very different from most people in the West. Ive met some people from the East before, you don't seem to be like them either."

Tomoyo said nothing and just nodded. She was afraid if she said any more, Ruby would change her mind.

"Do you know why I fired so many maids in the past?" Ruby asked while supressing a yawn. Tomoyo could tell she was getting sleepy.

"I just figured you were high maintenance."

"Unlike you, they let me win." She said with a frown. "I'm not stupid. I know what everyone in the village thinks of me. That I'm weak, useless. You may not know this but in the West, we hold hard labour and work in high regard, honourable. Even the sick, the poor, the widowed, they work. It's admirable. We value those who exert themselves. Yet here I am, barely able to walk to the front door without some assistance."

Tomoyo felt the sting of familiarity within Ruby's words. It wasn't so long ago when Tomoyo also felt she was useless, not fit for her surroundings. The difference was, Tomoyo accepted it, owned it even. Ruby seemed in a state of self-punishment.

Ruby's eyes seemed to sink further into her head with sadness. "Mrs Hiiragazawa is always looking out for me, getting me assistance, but I know I'm a burden. But these maids she gets, they're afraid of me. They let me win, they feel sorry for me, they don't speak to me. They feel sorry for me so they insist I just lay in bed and rest until I feel numb. I can't believe I'm saying this but…today was the most fun I've had in such a long time." There was a hint of a smile on her face. "So thank you, I guess."

Tomoyo didn't know what to say, so she just kept staring at the view.

"I wish I could work with the other villagers, they're suffering so much and I'm just here being useless-"

"Ugh, give it a rest." Tomoyo said cutting her off.

"What?"

"Are you serious? You're sick. Fuck what the villagers think. We have a sweet deal here. Let them plough through dirt. I'm not getting my hands dirty just for a matter of 'pride'"

Ruby didn't know how to respond, she just laughed. "You know, Madison, your honesty around here is going to tick off a lot of people."

Tomoyo smiled wickedly. "It wouldn't be the first time."

Tomoyo felt a weight lift from her. If Ruby liked her, she had a secure job and no manual labour for her. Things were working out nicely.

"You do need to learn how to cook and clean though. Otherwise there's no way I'm paying you."

Tomoyo rested her head back and smirked. "Whatever you say."

Ruby glanced over at her. There was something slightly refreshing about being in Madison's presence. Yet, something else weighted heavily on her mind.

"The rumours are true about you, you know." Ruby said in a quieter, more serious tone that called Tomoyo's attention. "Since you've been here, there have been rumours of how beautiful you were. They're not wrong. Men are already wondering if you're looking to marry. I hear they're even willing to overlook that you're an Easterner."

Tomoyo scoffed to herself. Married into the West, now there's something her mother would most definitely have a heart attack over.

"I'm sure your use to it. People telling you how beautiful you are." Ruby said with a hint of bitterness that Tomoyo ignored.

Tomoyo shrugged. She had been told all her life she was beautiful, captivating even. It became white noise to her.

"Madison." Ruby said in a serious tone. Tomoyo looked at her and saw dead cation in Ruby's eyes. "Don't take my husband from me."

Tomoyo's heart rate went up. Images of Eriol came to mind and she wondered if Ruby could read Tomoyo's infatuation with Eriol on her face. Was it obvious?

"I've fired many girls for looking at my husband the wrong way. Most of them end up doing field work until their hands bleed. Mrs Hiiragazawa doesn't take too kindly to that sort either."

Tomoyo gulped and looked away. "And why would I want your husband?" Tomoyo said with less confidence.

"Girls like you lust after him for the same reasons. I'm telling you now, he's loyal to me, and only me. I like you Madison. But if you want to stay working for me, there is one condition. Don't speak to my husband. If that's something you can't do. Then you needn't come back tomorrow."

Tomoyo knew better than to joke around or make light of what Ruby said. She had girls be envious of her in the past. She's witnessed her closest friends become protective of their boyfriends and husbands around Tomoyo. She didn't blame them, Tomoyo could be wicked and see them as a challenge. She never lost.

But she was in new territory now. She needed some form of secure job. With that in mind, Tomoyo smiled a tight smile and nodded.

"I wouldn't even dream of it."

X x x

 _Present_

"I'm…. Madison." Tomoyo's voice came out so breezy Eriol almost didn't catch her fake name.

Tomoyo felt like she was winded. After she brought Ruby to bed she had disappeared momentarily to take out the broken shards from the plate she'd dropped earlier. She didn't even hear him come in.

Eriol looked down at her and said nothing.

Tomoyo was not stirred. She absorbed every detail in his face, the way he stood, he was taller than she'd remembered. Tomoyo worried that she'd awaken and find herself back in her palace in North Tomoeda, and all this would have only been a dream.

As they stood there, Tomoyo waited for a spark of recognition that was never to come. She had ridiculous hope that he'd remember the day he almost killed her. But his eyes remained blank, no indication that he knew her at all. She should have expected that, but she still felt disappointed.

Eriol just nodded and walked past her. He had other things on his mind than the new maid. Tomoyo turned and kept her gaze on him. She got a whiff of his scent, hard work and heat.

Suddenly her earlier promise to Ruby to 'leave her husband alone' was completely forgotten.

"I'm sorry I didn't get to clean properly, I'll finish tomorrow." She said and leaned against the wall.

She wanted to get him talking. She wanted to hear the deep vibration of his voice like earlier.

He kept his back to her as he rummaged through some books and jotted things down. Tomoyo watched unashamed his back and arm muscles flex. He ran a hand through his jet black hair as he focused on what he was doing. He was here, in the same room as her. Tomoyo imagined it so many times and wondered what she did to make karma this good to her. She felt a deep longing in her groin. It felt good to want someone like this again. It made her feel powerful, even.

He didn't respond to her.

"Thank you, for saving me from the asylum." She said in stronger hopes that he'd notice her. She wanted him to turn around and rest his eyes on her face and immediately become smitten. There was no veil this time.

"I didn't save you. That was someone else's doing." He said sharply without looking at her.

Tomoyo flinched. Did she upset him? Why was he so dismissive towards her?

"You can leave now." He said without so much as raising his head.

Tomoyo's took a moment to recover from what she felt was like rejection. She grabbed her bag with laughably few belongings and walked towards the front door. She placed her hand on the door handle and glanced back at him. He was engrossed in his task. His face creased in exhaustion with his sapphire eyes reading over the lines on the page before him.

Tomoyo felt a flush reach her face. She had never been rejected before. She welcomed the cold breeze as she left the house. Her heart still pounded with their brief encounter.

She stood in the middle of the dirt track that would take her back to the commune where she would have to share a room with twenty other girls.

Why did he suddenly become angry with her? How could he dismiss her? _Her_? The harsh reality was that she was not a princess anymore. Today proved that. Tomoyo felt embarrassment to flood her cheeks and a butterfly flap in her stomach.

She smirked, her promise to Ruby already became a distant memory.

Eriol Hiiragazawa would be a challenge.

And Tomoyo always welcomed a challenge.

X x x

 **Next updates will be of SxS and mayybbbee all four of their lives will intertwine...**

 **Thanks for reading!**

x x x

Tomoyo's feet ached.

The walk back to the commute was longer than she'd remembered. After the day she had, she just wanted to pass out.

It was pitch black and one side of the track was shielded by trees.

She halted.

Up ahead, she could hear muffled voices. All men.

She walked on. Her secure life in North Tomoeda had not equipped her with safety awareness. The dirt path came to a crossroads. She thought no other soul was present until she heard a muffled cry coming from the trees.

She followed the cry until she came to a clearing and immediately regretted her decision.

The cry was coming from the bloodied mouth of a badly beaten young man. He was being propped up by two other men. In front of them, a tall man swung his fist another few times at the young man's face cause Tomoyo to gasp loudly.

Upon hearing the scream, Touya stopped mid punch and looked back at her with malevolent eyes.

Tomoyo said nothing. She felt fear looking at Touya's bloodied fist. Touya's scowl quickly shifted into a charming smile. He stood up straight and patted down his tousled hair, paying no attention to his bloodied fist.

"Madison. We seem to keep running into each other." Tomoyo didn't know if it was the unnerving charm to his voice or his complete lack of acknowledging the boy that rooted her to the ground in fear.

He walked up to her casually. Tomoyo began to take small steps back.

"Why are you beating him?" She asked. She was annoyed at the quiver in her voice.

Touya tossed his head over his shoulder at the boy whose face was unrecognisable now and gave a short laugh. "Don't worry about him. It's under control."

"Doesn't seem to be." She said through her teeth. She didn't know why she was trying to act tough or challenge him. She should have just left, pretended she saw nothing.

Touya tilted his head to the side. Even in the darkness of the forest she could make out the intensity in his eyes. It put fear into her.

"We caught him talking to a soldier. Just enquiring into what it was about. Don't worry about it." He said and reached out to touch her face.

Tomoyo flinched and took a step back. She pressed her back tight into the tree behind her.

Touya caught up to her and placed his hand on the bark of the tree, making escape troublesome for her. He was smiling but there was ill intent behind his eyes.

"You haven't been mixing with outsiders yourself, have you Madison?" He asked and traced a finger over the cheekbone, sending a chill up her spine. "No." He said. "You wouldn't do that now, would you? After all the trouble we went through to get you out of that asylum... I think you're smarter than that. You're one of us now."

"I should go." Tomoyo said quickly and turned to leave.

He caught on to her elbow and pushed her back to where she was. Her head bounced of the bark of the tree, sending pain across her skull. "Why the hurry? We're only talking, aren't we?"

Behind Touya, the other two soldiers were silent, watching on as if waiting for Touya's command.

Tomoyo wasn't sure what to do. By default, she matched his twisted smile and leaned back.

"Such tough men, aren't you?" she said with a smirk. "Practically beating a child. Is this the part where you and your two buddies have your way with me? Ruffle me up? Threaten me? Go ahead." She held her hands up and batted her eyes at him. "I won't even scream. Whatever makes feel like a man for once." Her words sounded confident, but her hands were sweating and her heart pounded in her chest.

Touya laughed darkly which echoed throughout the whole woods. Tomoyo thought he would let her go. Instead his hand clamped over mouth and pushed her head back into the tree.

Her scream was muffled under his hand. Her heart pounded. She could smell the dirt and blood off his hand.

Touya leaned into her ear and said.

"Oh, Madison, I like you. I like you a lot. I hope you prove very useful to me." He chuckled darkly and kept his eyes fixed on her. He touched his forehead against hers. She felt his breath on her face. "I suggest you keep what you've seen here to yourself. It's best for everybody."

Tomoyo choked back tears. She refused to cry in front of him.

"And for the record," He said softly with a wry smile. "You are so, so, _so_ not my type."

He laughed and released her.

Tomoyo welcomed the release of pressure.

"Don't get lost on your way home." He called casually over his shoulder and returned to the other two men.

Tomoyo wasted no time leaving. Her heart was beating so loudly in her ears she couldn't hear her own thoughts.

She didn't like Touya. He unnerved her in ways no one ever did.

One thing was for certain, out of all the people in Tomoeda, Touya could never, ever know of her true identity.

If he ever did, she'd be in a worse state than the boy with the bloodied face.

X x x


	11. Working Girl

**Hey!**

 **Sorry for the long break between chapters. I went back to Ireland for sometime and took a break from writing. Back in Japan now and hope to power through with more chapters!**

 **Enjoy :)**

 _Passage from Nathala B. Omerson's Diary_

 _One problem the Tomoedan government still struggle to deal with, is agriculture._

 _The low Eastern and Southern lands are prone to floods and spells of drought, making the lands dry and farming almost impossible. The only survivor of such harsh weather conditions, is the high lands of the West, which every year without fail produces enough food to supply to all of Tomoeda. The West, being larger than the East, North and South combined has plenty of room to farm enough raw materials to not only keep the Tomoedan economy up, but to keeps us all out of the grasp of starvation._

 _This information has not gone unnoticed by the military or the monarch. With every passing year, the ration distribution has gone in favour of the North, leaving Westerners with bare minimum. The unfairness of which, I don't think needs explaining._

 _The Military have threatened and used fear to keep western farmers working in unfair and unsanitary conditions for below minimum wage._

 _But what can they do?_

 _Nothing._

 _For now, they can do nothing._

X x x

The train rattled loudly but Sakura was too angry to notice.

She stood wedged between two men in suits and a mother with a baby nestled in her arms. She held onto a pole to keep from falling when the train stopped. In the other she held onto the letter she received yesterday morning. Her eyes read it over and over again, each time getting angrier and angrier.

 _'_ _Bastard'_ she muttered in Mahr Bratain which got her a sideways glance from the man beside her.

She stepped off the train and headed straight for the military Base. Her pass card was good for one more day before she'd have to renew it. She clamped her jaw shut to keep from muttering to herself. All night in her quiet house she tossed and turned wondering if she was blowing this out of proportion, if maybe she should just be happy about it in instead of questioning the motives behind it.

She was thankful when her card swiped her through without a problem and headed straight for his office.

Her mind tried to conjure up the exact right words to say but her brain was still recycling old thoughts. It's been doing that a lot recently. She knew why, she just didn't want to admit to herself that he had left her feeling in a permanent state of limbo since their last encounter, since they were together, barely clothed, sweaty…

 _Stop it!_ She said scolding herself. _Stop thinking about that. It's over and never to be spoken of again._

Sakura walked quickly along the sand training field with her head low. She didn't want unnecessary attention from others or to draw attention to the fact that she had finished her work days ago.

"Kinomoto-san!" She heard from behind her followed by the excited boot steps coming towards her.

"I can't talk today Chiharu." Sakura said sternly without looking at her.

"So yesterday I shot a bottle off a barrel with a hand pistol because James Fowler bet his lunch that I couldn't because I injured by arm during training but then I proved him wrong and now Jenny Rice bet a weeks worth of chores that she can shoot _two_ bottles off-"

"That's great Chiharu, now go away." Sakura said not feeling up to one of Chiharu's long stories that go nowhere.

"Oh, are you looking for Lieutenant Colonel Li? Oh I'm so glad! I haven't seen you two together in such a long time I thought your guys were having a lover's quarrel." She said with too much giddiness that made Sakura stop in her tracks and face her with astonishment.

As always, Cadet Chiharu had her hair in two pigtails with her straw blonde fringe poking out from under her hat. She smiled giddily, displaying her crooked tooth.

"I'm going to ignore what you just said." Sakura said in a controlled voice. "Do you know where Sy- Lieutenant Colonel Li is?"

"Umm…" Chiharu scratched her head with her finger. "Usually on Friday's he comes out to train us but today, I think he's in his office. He seems really busy lately."

Sakura nodded and began to walk away.

"I hope you guys make up!" Chiharu called before skipping away.

X x x

Marianne was replying to emails when Sakura came to her desk with a face like thunder.

"Is he in?" Sakura asked before Marianne could tell her to leave.

"Yes, but-"

"Is he in a meeting?"

"No, but as I was trying to say-"

Sakura walked past her desk without looking back at her.

"Lieutenant Colonel Li doesn't want to be distracted! I suggest you leave."

Sakura was already opening the door before Marianne could finish her sentence.

Syaoran was at his desk reading over the same files and reports again and again. He pinched his temples. The dots simply weren't joining up. Tomoyo was last caught on tape moments before the explosion went off in the asylum, then nothing. None of the bodies identified were Tomoyo. She seemed to have simply vanished into thin air. Not that Lieutenant General Mizuki or General Li were lending any resources to help with finding her.

Although, it looks like the unit is stretched out trying to locate the rebels.

The media were keeping hush about it. The priority is, and always was, to keep a sense or order within Tomoeda. A missing princess was disastrous to the delicate balance. He had read an article in the _'Tomoedan Mirror'_ which simply stated that the princess had fallen the victim of the flu and would not be about for social or political events. Syaoran felt most sorry for the King and Queen, who had to continue as normal knowing their daughter was out there somewhere, dead, or alive.

Sonomi had rang him more times than he could count. In the end, he had to ignore her calls.

Syaoran refocused his attention onto the files.

Kinomoto Touya. There were still no breakthrough with that case. And it was driving Meiling insane.

His head was fuzzy. He wished he could be out with the cadets instead. He loathed office work, loathed his unearned promotion that meant more paper pushing than actual on the ground work.

The door opened suddenly. Syaoran ripped open a desk drawer and dumped the files into it before the person could see. Syaoran froze to see Sakura standing in front of his desk with a look of disdain on her face.

Syaoran felt a million thoughts fly through his head. They hadn't spoken since they had slept together. He lost count of the amount of times he attempted to call her, to get on a train heading East but always talked himself out of it.

He opened his mouth but she cut across him.

"I don't need your help. For anything." She said low but fiercely.

Syaoran slowly stood up and hoped she would elaborate more.

"I'm not sure I follow."

"I got a job today."

Again, Syaoran hoped she would elaborate. He wondered if he had somehow stepped on her toes or interfered in some way. But as far as he knew, he was keeping himself away.

"That's…good news I presume?"

"Don't pretend like you had nothing to do with it."

"I assure you, I have no idea what you are talking about."

"You're telling me you've had nothing to do with me getting a job at the _'Tomoedan Mirror'_ , the most prestigious newspaper in Tomoeda. That honestly had nothing to do with you?" She said and tossed her job offer letter on the table

"That's…amazing. Congrat-"

"I didn't sleep with to get any favours, ok!?"

"Christ, keep your voice down." He said in panic. "Does your psychotic, suspicious mind actually think I had anything to do with this? Media and publications isn't even anywhere near my department."

Sakura wanted to come back with a witty remark, but doubt kept her silent. Syaoran looked like he was telling the truth.

"So…this had nothing to do with you…with us?"

Syaoran shook his head and crossed his arms.

"Well then…how?" She asked starting her regret the whole scene she was causing.

"Well…did you apply for the job?"

"Yeah but…I didn't think I'd get it."

Syaoran shrugged and looked at her like _'don't you feel like a fool now.'_

"Congratulations." He said trying to hide a smirk.

Sakura frowned and looked away as a blush invaded her cheeks. "It's only an internship." She muttered.

"When do you start?" He asked easing his way around the table, closing the gap between them. Sakura awkwardly swayed and looked up at the impressive bookshelf's in his office.

"I'm meeting the boss at two."

Syaoran checked his watch. It was only just gone ten.

"So…you came in four hours early out of your way just to yell at me?" He said lightly with some humour, testing out the waters. "I thought you'd have more to say."

Sakura opened her mouth to give a witty reply but came up with nothing, then realized he was right. What was her real reason for coming in so abruptly that she didn't even give herself a chance to shower or eat breakfast? If she was so angry, how come the anger evaporated within a short time of seeing him?

When Sakura didn't reply, awkwardness fell into the silence. Images of their night together flooded her mind. The passion, skin on skin, the heat and the cold as he suddenly left. That was the part that annoyed her the most. The fact he left so suddenly, and the fact that she showed him the door. What would have happened if she asked him to stay? Would he have said yes?

Syaoran saw her face drop, sensing her vulnerability, he swooped in.

"About the other night…" He began.

Sakura tensed but did not interrupt him.

"I'm sorry, for how I left things. I just…didn't expect that to happen."

Sakura nodded. She knew she should say something too, but chose silence instead.

"I mean…I could have at least bought you breakfast." It was risky of him to put a funny spin on it.

Her mouth twitched and a small smile broke onto her face. Sakura bit her lip and kept looking over at the bookshelf. Did that mean he didn't have regrets? He wanted it to happen too?

He took another chance and closed the gap between them. Sakura didn't move but regarded him with caution as he stood in front of her.

"I guess…I'm…you know." She mumbled and he nodded. "I can't help but to be…cold…at times."

She felt nervous under his gaze. He brought her chin up with his finger. Beneath her fringe her green eyes were calm. He never thought he could get this close to her. She was allowing him to be near her. When his finger traced her cheekbone delicately they both remembered the feel of each other's skin from their night of passion. They had seen each other naked, at their most vulnerable.

In that moment Sakura couldn't go through the effort of denying it anymore, there was something between them. Something that made her feel warm and distracted her from herself, from her irrationality, suspicion and scepticism. When she thought of him, minutes would go by where she wasn't herself, it felt good.

For once, Syaoran felt in control of their interactions. Her walls were temporarily down. He brushed back her fringe with his fingers and stared deep into her eyes.

 _How many secret are you hiding?_ He thought. _What is it your keeping from me?_

Her face at that moment was of innocence. But Syaoran wondered how much of it was true innocence and naiveite. Her soft pink lips were curved into a smile and Syaoran imagined them whispering secrets to Touya Kinomoto and other unknown possible terrorists.

 _Perhaps you are the most dangerous of them all._

Syaoran had a vivid image stuck on his mind as he left the Kimonoto house. He noticed an office, presumably Fujitaka's. If Sakura wasn't the link to Touya, maybe her father was. Either way, he would need to get himself back to the Kinomoto house. Sakura would be the key.

Again, Syaoran felt guilt.

The moment was broken when the phone rang harshly, making Sakura flinch backwards. Syaoran swiped it up and held it to his ear. Sakura grabbed her bag and turned to leave but felt Syaoran's hand grab her wrist. It was not a rough grab, nor was it forceful. As Syaoran spoke down the phone he looked at her as a plea to wait.

Sakura relaxed. He kept his hand on her wrist and with a light tug she came forward two steps forward.

Syaoran nodded as he listened to the phonecall.

"You're needed at the General's office today at four p.m." General Mizuki said in her blunt manner.

"I see. What is it about?"

"…You will find out. The General has requested your presence. Don't be late." She said before she hung up.

Syaoran put the phone back onto the receiver and felt his nerves build up immediately. His father wanted to see him…personally. This can't be good. Not after last time.

"Um…I better go." Sakura said after Syaoran stayed in a trance for too long.

He had forgotten her was holding on to her.

"Sorry," He said releasing her.

Sakura lingered as if wanting to say something, she decided against it.

"Wait," He said as she was at the door.

She noted a flutter in her stomach when he stopped her.

"Can I buy you breakfast? It's still early." He said nodding at the clock.

"No." Sakura said bluntly with a hint of a smile.

"Lunch?"

"No."

"Can I walk you to your train later?"

"I can make my own way to the train." She said and placed her hand on the door knob to leave. Syaoran wondered how long it would take to build up that intimacy with her again. Two, maybe three weeks. Too damn long.

Suddenly she turned her head to the side and said over her shoulder. "My father's business trip has been extended two days. I should be home at seven."

Before Syaoran could even respond she was out the door. It thudded lightly behind her and as it did Syaoran smirked.

Sakura Kinomoto was hard to read, but even he could recognize her invitation.

X x x

Unlike last time, Syaoran was relieved to see Meiling and General Lieutenant Mizuki in the General's office.

Although, the same could not be said for Meiling, who was enduring one of Mizuki's berating's. Meiling's face looked like it was desperately trying to conceal fury and fear at the same time. Syaoran had arrived mid-rant and missed whatever made Mizuki so angry.

Syaoran felt for Meiling. When Mizuki was angry, no one wanted to be on the receiving end of it. Lieutenant General Mizuki was a tall and beautiful woman who was always analytical and clinical with everything she approached. But she was intimidating on a whole other level. For her to even raise her voice, you had to have fucked up bad.

"And even though I'm throwing you every single resource available, you're telling me you haven't even gotten hold of a piece of evidence that can lead to Touya Kinomoto or any of the other rebels." She spat.

"We are doing every single thing we can-"

"Yes or no Lieutenant, that's all I want to hear. Yes. Or. No!" General Lieutenant Mizuki was subtly shaking with rage. Her long red hair hung down her back like red rope.

"No, Lieutenant General." Meiling's hands were clasped behind her back so tightly that Syaoran could see her knuckles whiten under the strain.

Mizuki drew in a sharp breath through her nose and looked down at Meiling for what seemed like an eternity. "When I assigned you this case, I thought you were competent enough to do it smoothly and with results. I see now I may have overestimated your abilities."

Meiling winced but didn't dare interrupt Mizuki.

"I forget that you are still young. It was a mistake to promote you so soon." She said calmly but her words were crushing Meiling like a tonne of bricks.

"Please forgive me for interrupting, General Lieutenant, but I promise you it was not a mistake. I _will_ find the rebels even if I have to do it myself I swear-"

"All talk, and yet such little results." Mizuki said.

Meiling was shaking with either rage for herself or fear. Syaoran wanted to interrupt. No one was working harder for the cause of Utopia than Meiling. The dedication of which was all over her face. Restless nights, interrogations, it all showed on her tired eyes.

"And you, Lieutenant Colonel." Mizuki said stabbing her gaze at Syaoran's direction.

Syaoran straightened up and felt his heart thud faster. He wondered if he would now be on the receiving end of Mizuki's rant.

"Don't think I don't know you're poking your nose into Princess Daidouji's disappearance."

Syaoran gulped, unsure of how to reply.

"I've turned a blind eye to it but now I'm giving you a direct order; drop the Daidouji case. It's not up to you to find her. There's already a team looking for her." She said.

Syaoran felt like a child who got caught doing something naughty.

"In fact, drop all your current case work. You're now in charge of terrorist investigation within the western walls. Lieutenant Meiling will hand over all documents relating to it by the end of the week."

"But-"

"Lieutenant Colonel please, don't do this! I can find them I swear! Don't take this case away from me." Meiling pleaded. She had her fists balled up and broke position. There was such hunger in her eyes.

"I agree with Lieutenant Li. I don't know this case as well as she does-"

"I'm sorry," Mizuki said in a dangerously calm voice. "Did I say this was a choice?"

Syaoran and Meiling fell back in line as if suddenly remembering their place.

"This is not up for negotiation. Lieutenant Colonel, for too long you've kept your head down, where things are safe behind the Southern wall." She walked over to him in small, slow steps and stopped right in front of him. "It's time that you get some teeth." She whispered. "We wouldn't want to think that the Lieutenant Colonel is only a paper pusher, now would we?"

Syaoran heard the message behind her words.

"As for you Lieutenant Li, you are in charge of the Cadet's training. They're too soft. I want them training more and ready to work within all side of the walls within the month."

Syaoran glanced over at Meiling, who was glaring back at him with rage. He'd never seen her direct anger at him ever.

"Yes, Lieutenant General." She managed to push through her teeth.

"You're excused." Mizuki said.

Syaoran was glad it was over. He wanted to get Meiling alone and figure a way to calm her down.

"Not you, Lieutenant Colonel." Mizuki said.

Syaoran froze before turning around. Mizuki turned towards the large office desk and saluted sharply before leaving. When the door closed behind them General Li turned in his large chair. Like always, his father's presence was heavy, like no other.

"Sit." He said in his deep voice.

Syaoran sat in front of the General. His hand began to sweat immediately. Syaoran tried to keep his eyes on the General's but they wavered now and again, unable to absorb the judgement behind them. Syaoran's eyes rested on the medals displayed on his uniform for wars which Syaoran only heard about from his father's friends and colleagues.

Syaoran didn't dare to speak, he sat in the silence. Even now, as an adult, Syaoran felt the same intimidation as he did when he was a child. Meetings like this were never to praise him. The General never praised his son, or showed his pride in him. Anything he did well or completed was not to be praised, only expected.

"Syaoran." He said which made Syaoran's chest tighten. The General rarely called him by his first name, only by his military ranking. To say his name, it acknowledged that they were related, that they were, in fact, father and son.

"Why are you running from this?" He said slowly. His face was expressionless.

Syaoran was confused, but chose his words carefully.

"What would I be running from, General Li?"

The General looked at his son. He had hoped that by now his son would be tougher, an up and coming military God. But, he feared he was still a boy. He needed to break that.

"Your responsibilities."

Syaoran felt the familiar sting of failure. His father doubted him, doubted his abilities. He wondered if Syaoran was an embarrassment to him. Would he have preferred a child whose skin was made of steel, who doubted and questioned nothing? Maybe he would have preferred a daughter like Meiling, whose hunger for success always left Syaoran feeling inadequate.

Syaoran stiffened his jaw. For reasons unknown to him, Syaoran had to restore his father's fate in him.

"I won't let you or Utopia down." Syaoran said with such confidence, he even fooled himself.

The General nodded and excused him but didn't take his eyes off his son as he left the room, noting the slight shake in his legs.

Outside the walls of this fathers, Syaoran breathed a sigh of relief. At the end of the large hallway, Meiling was sitting on a chair in a dark corner. She had her hands balled in her hair as if attempting to rip out every strand.

"Meiling," Syaoran whispered as he neared her. He needed to clear things up with her.

Meiling looked up slowly with a thundering glare in her eyes. She wasn't crying, Meiling didn't cry, she just pushed herself on with things. But now with her job taken away from her, where was there to push to?

"Meiling, look, what happened back there-"

"Was to be expected." She spat lowly.

Syaoran blinked and took a step back. She wasn't opening herself up to him.

"What do you mean."

"Oh, cut it out, Syaoran." She hissed and looked at him with venomous eyes. "We both knew this would happen. Sometime or other. I was just a fool to think I could win this one."

"Win what Meiling? I didn't want your case. Lieutenant General made that decision."

Meiling bolted to her feet and took two strides towards him.

Syaoran backed away in surprise.

"And why do you think she did that? Why do you think you got promoted to Lieutenant Colonel? Why do you think it is that I have to work twice as hard to get a fraction of the recognition that you get for doing the minimum?"

Syaoran felt his stomach knot. He knew where this was going, he just didn't want her to say it. But he knew it was coming.

"I have done nothing but give myself to Tomoeda and everything it stands for. And what do you do? You cower behind a desk, do what's expected and get _promoted_. It sickens me. You don't deserve it and you know it!" She said now on the verge of tears.

Meiling had reached her limit. She had given her all only for it to be given to Syaoran. She took a step back, closed her eyes and calmed herself. When she opened her eyes again she had gained composure.

She swiped her cap from her chair and placed it firmly on her head.

Syaoran said nothing. There was nothing to say, she was right.

"Well, I guess we're all not fortunate enough to be the General's son." She said calmly, knowing that would sting Syaoran.

Syaoran didn't try to stop her as she marched past him, leaving in the dark to wallow in her words.

X x x

 _Passage from Nathala B. Omerson's Diary_

 _Oh, the media._

 _The second great oppressor in Tomoeda._

 _The papers, the radio, and if you're fortunate enough to own one, the t.v. They will bombard you will news of Tomoeda's glory. And we are the ones who are eating it up._

 _The media is the little persistent voice telling you to rat out your neighbour, you friend, and unfortunately, your family, in the name of Utopia. Don't criticize the media, oh no. The voice of resistance has no platform in Tomoeda._

 _The Tomoedan media is a pillar that keeps the regime afloat._

 _But if it were taken down, the resistance would have an advantage._

 _X x_

Everything Sakura needed to know about working at the ' _Tomoedan Mirror'_ was explained to her within ten minutes by a short brunette named Naoko, who was less than thrilled to have Sakura working there.

"This is your desk where you'll work from. Work hours are up to you as long as you do seven hours a day."

Sakura dropped her bag onto the tiny desk which was still cluttered with the contents from the previous employee. The computer was a much older model compared to her colleagues and her desk was located a little too close to the bathrooms.

Sakura made no gesture to indicate this bothered her. She expected not to be treated equal in the South.

Naoko twisted her lip and looked Sakura up and down. "Punch your card in and out everyday and don't bother the boss."

Sakura nodded and casted an eye around the floor. Everyone's desk was in open space and not in cubicles like she imagined. The place was quiet enough with everyone furiously writing their pieces. Sakura wondered how she got a job here.

"There's a girl from the East here two. Maybe you two will get along." She said.

Sakura hid her scowl. "How kind, thanks."

"One more thing. Everything you write here in monitored, so…." She trailed off.

Sakura crossed her arms. "I wouldn't dream of doing anything un Utopia like." Sakura said with an exaggerated smile.

Naoko ignored her and said; "Someone from higher up will come down to give you your assignment." Naoko left.

Sakura blew hot air out of her cheeks and glanced around. The other co-workers were not subtle at glancing at her. They must have all been from the South and North. The Tomodan Mirror was so prestigious, she certainly felt like an imposter.

"Comfortable?" Someone asked from behind her.

Sakura's eyes flickered up to the tall figure behind her. When her eyes landed on him she bolted upright.

She had forgotten the how tall he was. The icy greyness of his eyes regarded her. She opened her mouth to speak but could not think of what to say. He did not blink as he regarded her.

"Tsukishiro Yue, I'm the CEO of the Tomoedan Mirror. It's your first day I understand." When he spoke, it sounded like an internal commentary rather than a conversation.

Sakura wanted to nod and say that she knew his name, but didn't want to acknowledge their first encounter at the bar where she was shunned because of her name. When she seen him first, she never imagined that Yue was the head of the Tomoedan Mirror, and her boss. She was intimidated.

Why was he wasting his time on an intern like her?

She just nodded.

"Kinomoto Sakura. Thank you for the opportunity to work for you. I'm very honoured-"

"This is you first assignment." He said cutting her off. He didn't care for pleasantries, she liked that.

Sakura took the report and read the assignment. Her face involuntary dropped.

"…The east Tomoedan bake sale?" She couldn't hide the disgust. "Is there…nothing else? I'm good at covering-"

"You could find another job if this doesn't suit." He said with a stony face. Sakura snapped her mouth shut. "Good, we leave in ten minutes."

"Y-you're bringing me."

"Is that a problem?" He asked. The whole office was staring now.

She shook her head and felt nerves shoot through her.

The car journey with Yue was extremely awkward. He doesn't like small talk, neither did she so it should have been fine. Sakura stole glances at him when she could. He had sharp bone structure and small ears. Today he tied his hair back and his silver fringe fell down in tuffs. His long delicate fingers gripped the steering wheel. He drove in silence with no radio. There was a strange, unexplainable attractiveness about Yue that made Sakura nervous. She wondered if he was married, or had a girlfriend.

"Thank you for driving me." She said in almost a whisper.

"I don't like to stay in the office too long." He replied, not taking his eyes off the window.

When they arrived at Marble Lake Park the place was buzzing with eager civilians strolling around with their families. Sakura's stomach twisted. She hated crowds. When they got out of the car Sakura was immediately assaulted by the harsh sun. She looked over at Yue who was in a grey jacket and his half his face under a red scarf, as if it were winter.

"You have two hours." He said and lit up a cigarette and stalked off.

X x x

After forty minutes, Sakura's notepad was still blank.

Children with face paint and balloons squealed as they ran past her. The general vibe was good, but it didn't reach Sakura, who felt herself reminiscing about when her family use to come here. She couldn't remember if she enjoyed it or not. Before her mother passed away from illness, she liked to go out as a family.

"Excuse me miss," Said an elderly lady interrupting her thoughts. "Would you like a free sample? It's made from all-natural products produced right here in the Tomoedan valley-"

"No thanks." Sakura answered and walked off.

She walked all the way to the last stall where few people lingered. While most stalls had almost sold out of their products, one stall at the end had barely sold anything. Sakura wandered over there and heard two women bickering in hushed whispers.

"I told you this was a bad idea!"

"The day isn't over yet, someone might come by."

"Please, this is a disaster. We'll never recover from this. All because of a couple of rumours."

"But what if the rumours are true? What if they're true and we're selling it? Kids buy our product!"

Sakura, intrigued by their panicked whispers, moved closer to them.

"Look, it's just competitors trying to tarnish our name. If we don't acknowledge it, it'll go away."

"But you don't know that. You don't know if the people in the West really-"

The girl with the black bob shushed when the other woman nudged her. They both beamed ridiculously false smiles at Sakura and offered her a sample.

"Like to try one miss? Our fruit bread is made with the most organic materials in Tomoeda-"

"No, tell me why your business is failing." Sakura said sharply and flipped open her notebook. It felt so good when she did that. It reminded her of how much she loved journalism in college, before she suddenly had to give it up.

The two women looked anxious and made side glances at each other. Sakura saw that most of their product had gone unsold.

"Look, we don't want bad press."

"Neither do I." Sakura said in a softer voice. "There's obviously a reason your business is failing. I want to give you good press, it'll only boost Tomoeda's reputation, right?"

Again, the women seemed unsure. But after a moment they caved.

"Some of the other businesses have been spreading rumours about our product. It makes people not want to buy it."

"Rumours like…?"

"Well…we order most of our products in from the West. Their ingredients are far better than anything we can produce here in the East. In fact, we've won countless awards purely from the organic ratio to-"

"Get to the point." Sakura mumbled as she jotted down what they were saying.

"Well…people have been saying that before the Westerners box up the ingredients to be sent, they….they…."

"They piss on the ingredients before shipping it to us!" The other barked in frustration.

Sakura raised an eyebrow and lowered her notepad.

"It's true, well, that's what people are saying. They're saying that those savages do all sorts of dastardly things and enjoy the thoughts of us eating it."

"And why would anyone believe that?"

"Look." She said pointing to the other stalls. "We're all in the same boat. Anyone who imports from the west are failing. Because we're our own company, the product isn't getting thoroughly checked. It's having an impact on East Tomoedan business, not just us."

Sakura couldn't believe she was jotting down such nonsense. She was more amazed at how rumours in East Tomoeda spread at a pathetically fast rate. As she scribbled notes down a thought fleeted dangerously across her mind.

Technically, she didn't know whether or not these rumours were true. No one did. But what if someone were to investigate what was really happening behind the walls of the West?

"Tell me more." Sakura said with a more intrigued tone.

A brilliant plan began to form in her mind.

X x x

"What the fuck is this?" He asked with a scowl breaking his smooth face.

He flicked through the notes she had scribbled down and Sakura held on tight to the notes she had torn out and kept in her pocket. She needed to think this through before telling him, even if he was her boss.

"I can flesh it out when I get home," She said. "Work on it at the weekend."

He turned to face her and there wasn't a shred of confidence on his face. He tossed the notepad onto her lap and muttered something under his breath. She didn't want to piss him off, but she needed to flesh out her plan before speaking.

"Where do you live?" He asked, his voice returning to its dark smoothness.

Sakura blinked twice and stuttered, "I, uh, I don't live far from here. You don't have to drive me home. My house is on Thyn Mahr street-"

Yue had already started the car and was reversing out. Sakura threw on her seatbelt and gulped. She definitely had a weird crush on Yue. It was a strange crush that made her look at him with curiosity and childish fascination. It wasn't the same with Syaoran.

"Shit." She muttered. She had forgotten about her not so subtle invitation she gave Syaoran earlier.

Yue said nothing.

The area of town where Sakura lived was difficult for someone from the outside to navigate. To her surprise, Yue effortlessly weaved in and out of the streets as if he'd done if several times before.

"When did they get rid of Penguin Park?" He asked lowly.

"How do you know about that?" She asked tilting her head towards him. When he didn't reply she said, "About three years ago. Military wanted another base in North East Tomoeda. It had to go."

"Ridiculous." He muttered in Mahr Bratain.

Sakura paled and looked at him. His face was smooth, not acknowledging his transition from English to her native language. Then the penny dropped.

" _You're originally from the East."_ She said changing from English to Mahr Bratain.

" _I was. I left a long time ago."_

 _"_ _Why? Why did you switch over? I mean- Why relocate?"_

Yue pondered as they waited at the traffic lights. Night was coming and in the darkening light Sakura saw that Yue was far more complicated than she could have ever imagined. It attracted her to him more. His chest rose and fell and his fingers twitched, itching for a cigarette.

"Reasons." He said switching back to English, signalling an end to the interrogation of Yue. "You wouldn't understand yet."

Sakura but her lip to stop from prodding more. _'Yet'..?_

His silver hair brushed against his shoulder and Sakura wondered if she had ever seen it before. A younger Yue from years ago around Touya's age. Had they ever crossed paths during the more peaceful times in Tomoeda?

They listened to the radio rattle on in the background.

 _'_ _In other events, the King signed the 'Military Trust Act' today at the Tomoedan South Base. The Act grants the Military greater powers to protect its citizens, authorize local bases throughout the country, as well as opening other lines for its citizens to report suspicious activity. The King was accompanied by Queen Sonomi. Princess Daidouji however, is still suffering from a non-threatening illness. Utopia wishes her well, and a speedy recovery.'_

"I heard Kero Jones died recently." He said suddenly. "You were there, apparently."

Sakura was very careful of how to respond. She had to remind herself that Yue was a very strong presence in Utopian Media. He could easily be spying on her. Yet, she didn't buy into it. He calmed her, unlike the intimidating presence of the General.

"Yes." She replied.

"How did he look?"

Sakura raised her eyebrow at him. She didn't know if she were being cornered for information.

"He looked…like he seen better days."

Yue nodded but a strong emotion passed over his face. Sorrow? Anxiety? Fear…?

She couldn't make him out. It attracted her to him so, but she'd have to watch herself better around him.

"I want to ask you something." He said suddenly.

He was putting Sakura on the edge. She wanted the car journey to be over but at the same time, she was enticed by the mystery around Yue.

"What?"

Yue leaned his head back, as if wondering whether or not he should ask her.

"You dropped out of journalism after a year in University. I want to know why?"

Sakura felt her stomach drop. She didn't expect that. That was an area she really, really didn't want to speak about.

"How did you…"

"Let not beat around the bush here. I'm the head boss of the _Tomoedan Mirror_ , I've looked into your files. I need to know who I'm hiring."

Sakura gulped, taken aback by his bluntness.

"I…I didn't like the course. So, I left."

"You were top of your class. Attendance was 100%. Seemed to me like you liked it just fine."

Sakura felt her heart thump. He wasn't going to drop this.

"If you know all this, then you know why I dropped out."

"I know what the university said. I want to know from your point of view."

Sakura looked out the window and sighed. She couldn't refuse to answer her boss. It was only the first day on the job. She needed this job. But she was grateful he wanted to hear it from her side.

"I…wrote an article in the university paper. It got published and…the University didn't like what I had to say. Some people ended up getting hurt. The university gave me a choice, retract the article and make a formal apology, or leave the university and face trial."

Sakura felt a lump in her throat. It was a stressful time in her life. For her and her father, who had to pull some strings to even give her a choice.

Yue gave a single slight nod.

"What was the article about?"

"You know what it was about. You don't need me to explain." She muttered, getting annoyed that he was prodding.

He didn't push her. He did know what she wrote in the article. He read it, over and over again. It intrigued him.

"Why are you still here?" He asked in his regular work tone.

"What?" She whispered, still absorbed with curiosity.

"We're here. Get out." He said and killed the engine.

Sakura glanced out the window and saw her house silently looking back at her.

Embarrassed, she scrambled out of the car and mumbled a thank you before closing the door. Yue did not look back as he raced ahead out of sight.

Yue gripped the steering wheel and pulled out a much-desired cigarette. Exhaling, he thought about their conversation. Was he too vague with her? Too direct? He didn't know. He had to know he could trust her before he brought her to his side.

He wished she would connect the dots quicker, he wanted to give her that push. But she'd have to dig a little deeper before he could act.

He took a left onto the highway which would bring him back to the South, a place he resided in but refused to call home.

And what about the Lieutenant Li? He thought. If the young Kinomoto girl was really having an affair with him, then maybe she is already corrupted. And what of the military itself? What if they were onto him? What if his years of meticulous planning were for nought?

Yue bit down on his cigarette and clutched his chest. He felt another panic attack inducing. He swerved the car onto the side of the road and routed violently for his inhaler. He used it and took two sharp inhales. He calmed down. The pressure was getting too much for him.

On top of that, Yue hadn't been able to see _him_ in weeks. The distance was killing him. He was losing sight of his goal. Yue thought about risking a call to him a few days ago, just to hear his voice. Just to be reassured by him. But he couldn't risk it. If Yue was caught, it'd destroy everything.

Catching a glimpse of himself in the mirror he scowled, angry at himself for being so weak. He couldn't crumble now. He had to do it.

Because he made a promise, and he wouldn't let _him_ down.

X x x

Sakura peaked out of the curtains to make sure Yue had indeed left.

She sighed with relief and let the curtain fall back. Breathing in through her nose she let her heartbeat go back to normal. It was weird to be around Yue so close for so long. He was intimidating and memorizing at the same time. Yet, she wondered if it was ok to be so close to her boss so soon. Maybe it was inappropriate, at the same time there seemed to be unsaid messages between them.

Sakura switched the kettle on. A low hiss escaped it as it boiled. She tapped her lip and pondered.

 _Yue…used to live in the East…knows of Kero Jones…did he know Touya before he died? Tomoeda East is a big place…the chances aren't that high._

The kettle clicked and she took out a cup for herself and sat down at the kitchen table. She was beginning to miss her father's presence…

"Ah!" She gasped.

She whipped out her notebook. How could she have been so caught up with thoughts of Yue, that she forgot the brilliant plan she schemed earlier at the Tomoedan bake sale. She began to write, pages and pages of how she might execute this plan. It would take a lot of discipline, patience, and a sudden personality change.

Then there was Yue, she'd have to bypass him. And even if she could bypass him…she had to get military approval. What would her father think?

She shook her head, she wouldn't tell him. It would save them from another argument.

Her pace was interrupted by the doorbell ringing. Instinctively she threw her pages of noted into the drawer under the table. She felt on edge. Who would be calling so late in the evening. Was it Yue? Did she say too much?

Or maybe…Syaoran?

She quietly edged into the hallway and caught a glimpse of a silhouette standing behind the front door window. It was not Syaoran, this person was shorter. Sakura sucked air through her nose and decided to ignore it.

There came a harsh bang which made her jump.

"Sakura, I know you're in there! Let me in my feet are killing me!"

Sakura nearly dropped with relief and answered the door.

"Rika, what are you doing here?" She asked sounding more annoyed than she intended to.

"Oh, lighten up. You never called, as usual." Rika pouted then broke into a smile. "I brought fancy booze though!" She said and held up a large bottle of wine. "Imported from the North! It has a Mirth base which I hear they farm in the West. It costs and arm and a leg but Cindy from work won a bottle in some raffle but she doesn't drink so-"

"Just come in Rika." Sakura sighed.

Once inside Rika planted a wine glass in front of Sakura. Sakura rubbed her temples and unwillingly drank with her friend.

"So, talk about good timing." Rika said with a cheeky wink.

"What?"

"Who was that _beautiful_ man who dropped you off today? Don't deny it! I saw you. Seems you guys were talking pretty intensely." She winked.

Sakura blushed at both Rika's comment and thinking about Yue.

"H-he's my boss. He was just giving me a lift home."

Rika swirled her glass around and raised her eyebrow playfully. "How kind of him. Does Lieutenant Li know you're cheating on him?"

Now Sakura's faced burned bright red. "N-no. I mean. What- how could I be? Syaoran is-"

"Syaoran!?" She asked with her eyes bulging with excitement. " .God. You guys are on first name basis. Well, you move quick-"

"Shut up Rika." She mumbled and squirmed in her chair. "That's not what I meant. There's nothing between the Lieutenant and me. I barely see him."

"Much to your disappointment." Rika said with an exaggerated pout. "Oh, I'm only teasing Sakura. I know there is nothing going on. Let me have my fantasies."

Sakura loosened up. She didn't know why she got so defensive. Rika was always making jokes. It felt so nice for Sakura to speak in her native language. Apart from her father, Sakura only spoke English outside the house. East Tomoedans had unfortunately adopted and accepted this unwritten rule. As a result, the current younger generation could barely speak a word of Mahr Bretain.

"This pretty boss of yours, does he have a name?"

Sakura took a sip of wine and winced before putting it down. "Tsukishiro Yue."

Rika almost chocked on her wine. She spluttered and slammed the glass down on the table.

"Are you serious?" She asked when she got her breath back. Tsukishiro Yue. Really?"

"Yeah, why? What wrong with that?"

"Sakura, are you dense? That's Yukito's cousin. Talk about keeping it in the family."

Sakura stuttered and shook her head. "No way. Tsukishiro is a common name-"

"I'm telling you, there was only ever one Tsukishiro in Tomoeda East, and that was Yukito's cousin. Sakura…you should be careful around him."

"Why?" She asked, her interest spiking.

Rika shuffled uncomfortably, regretting what she said. "Well, I um…I just heard things…about him. It could be all hearsay though."

"Things like what?" Sakura asked, leaning in.

"Well, apparently, when he was younger, before his citizenship test, he was rumoured to a be part of an…anti-Utopia group. Caught several times, sent to re-education camps…but he was under the age so he was still protected by law to some degree. But I heard from Yukito that he was on the edge of being exiled to the West."

Sakura held onto every word. Rika was mostly sensible, she was not the type to exaggerate a story, the extent to the truth however, that was unknown.

"So…then what?" Sakura asked.

Rika drained the bottom of her glass and let it settle before continuing.

"That's the thing…no one really knows. One day he was an alleged rebel and the next…he defected."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, he severed all ties with the East and moved to the South. Doesn't talk to family or friends this side of the wall anymore."

"B-but…how did he go from being a possible extremist to head of media and programming in the South? How and why did he suddenly switch sides?"

"That," She said and scooped up her bag. "Is the biggest mystery of it all. A secret only Yue knows."

Sakura slumped back and though back to her earlier conversation with Yue. The way he spoke about Tomoeda East, about Penguin Park…was that nostalgia? Regret? Or maybe even a small form of distain?

"Be careful, Sakura." Rika said as she stood up. "I don't think you should get too close to your boss. His intentions might not be so good."

Sakura nodded, she was already absorbed in her own thoughts. This would be something new to ponder about Yue.

"Nice to catch up!" She said and made her way out.

Sakura brought her to the door. She had to admit, it was nice to catch up with Rika.

"For the last time, no." Sakura said with light humour.

"Pleeeease! Just let me set you up with my cousin. He's a really nice guy and he works at the hospital too."

Sakura put her hand behind her to open the door.

"I don't want you to end up a single shrivelled up old lady with ten cats-" Rika broke off md-sentence and her mouth dropped.

"What's wrong?" Sakura asked and looked in the direction Rika was gawking at.

Talk about bad timing. Sakura felt her stomach drop. There, standing behind the open door, was Syaoran.

Rika and Sakura stared in silence with opened mouths. Syaoran, in semi-uniform, was surprised to see that Sakura wasn't alone.

"Good…evening…" He said in a voice that failed to convince anyone.

He made eye contact with Sakura, who seemed unable to muster up an excuse as to why the Lieutenant Colonel was at her house this late at night.

Rika's gawk moulded into a giant smile. She didn't do a good job in securing the excited squeak that fell out of her mouth.

"Good evening, Lieutenant Colonel." She said in giggle voice and stretched her hand out.

Syaoran shook her hand with an awkward smile. Sakura said nothing.

"So, eh, what brings you to the neighbourhood. Specifically, this neighbourhood, this house?" She said and plonked her hand on Sakura's shoulders.

Sakura suppressed a glare.

"I…have some business with this household." He said with vagueness.

"Documents." Sakura added. "The Lieutenant Colonel needs documents…for…"

"You job transferral." He offered and she was glad he could think on his feet.

"Oh?" Rika said with a playful grin. "Strange, I usually send my documents by mail. I didn't think I could get the Lieutenant Colonel to come to by door for such small things. If you were making personal appearances every time I switched jobs I'd change my job every week-"

"Ok, Rika, goodnight." Sakura said and gave her a light push out the door.

She obliged but not before, looking from Syaoran to Sakura and giggling, making them both blush.

Syaoran waited for Rika to disappear around the corner before saying anything.

"I'm sorry…I didn't think anyone would be home."

"It's ok." Sakura said suddenly nervous.

She took the sleeve of his arm and tugged him inside. Once in the hallway they both became shy.

"Do you think… your friend will-"

"No. She talks a lot, but she's no gossip. She won't say anything."

He nodded and silence descended between them. Sakura felt a mixture of nervousness and nausea in a good way. She liked that he was here, even though they weren't doing anything.

"Do you want…some tea?" She asked and picked at the pocket of her trousers.

"Sure." He replied.

She disappeared into the kitchen and with shaky hands, she made a small cup of tea. When she came back Syaoran was in the living room, eyeing up the bookshelf. They sat down on the couch and began to chat about innocent things. Neither of them willing to test out how the other felt about this.

"Can I ask you something?" Sakura asked. "About my interview."

Syaoran tensed but nodded. "You can ask, but I can't guarantee you I can answer." He said, hating how much he sounded like a soldier.

"Towards the end of my interview, you quoted a Nathala B. Omerson quote… I was just wondering, why a soldier, of all people would know that?"

Syaoran thought about her question.

"When I was a kid, my mother would read to me all the time. I have four older sisters so when she read to me, it was our thing. It was personal. Probably the happiest I was." Syaoran leaned back into the sofa and kept his eyes on his hands. "When she died, I decided to keep reading by myself. It was comforting in a way and kept her memory alive. In the library, there were still some…" He hesitated. "pre-regime books that had yet to be disposed of. I came across one of Nathala B. Omerson's books and I just read it, didn't think anything of it at the time."

He looked at Sakura, who was giving him his whole attention. They were sitting side by side, shoulders almost touching.

"When I saw you at the interview, I just kept thinking about that quote. I can't explain why. I just did."

Sakura said nothing. She was strangely satisfied with his reply. She was finding out more about him. It humanized him. She imagined what his mother was like, how difficult it must have been being the youngest of four sisters, and the pain he must have went through when he lost his mother, just like she did, when she sadly lost hers.

She shuffled closer to him and rested her eyes on his face. She was fascinated at the vulnerability in his eyes. They betrayed him, she noticed. The ambers flecks of his pupils shone in the dark living room. She could smell him and it comforted her in a way that scared her. She didn't want to feel so comforted around him.

The last time they were in her living room together, Sakura had her walls up and was on the defensive. Her guard was unbreakable. At least, that how she was, now, was a different story.

Reading her signals, Syaoran brought his hand up and grazed her high cheekbone with the back of his fingers. The touch made her stomach flutter. Syaoran didn't think she'd let him touch her so easily.

He did nothing but seem to constantly think about her since he was here last time. And he cursed himself for how he left it. He needed to make it right, to make it clear.

"Sakura…" He said in a soft and whispered voice. "What this is…us…nobody can know. It can only exist here, where nobody can see. Do you...still want this?"

Sakura's heart was beating with anticipation. Her last shred of pride was begging her not to give in, to put up her walls and go on the defence. Don't be a fool and fall for him.

"Yes." She whispered.

The word barely left her mouth before he kissed her. They both had not realized that they've been waiting for this for a long time. Their breathing intensified as Syaoran wrapped his arms around the small of her back and pulled her in. The house was silent except for their footsteps as they made their way towards her bedroom. As their clothes peeled away, layer by layer, Sakura shunned the voice of suspicion, which was sure to return the following morning. But for now, she let herself succumb to desire, something she rarely allowed herself to do.

X x x

"Do you want me to leave?" Syaoran asked after a few minutes of silence.

Sakura's heart was still racing as she lay on her side with her head pressed against his chest. She could hear his own heart calming down.

She unravelled her naked body from his and looked at him with sleepy eyes. "Do you want to leave?" She asked, not hiding the sadness in her voice. The house was so empty, she feared it would be worse if he left now.

He smiled and pushed the hair out of her eyes. "Not particularly. But you're hard to read."

She smirked and lay down beside him. "If you want to stay…that's fine." She said trying to sound indifferent.

"In that case," He replied, throwing a hand over her and kissing her head. "I'll take the first train back in the morning."

Sakura supressed a giddy smirk and just nodded. He drew small circles with his thumb on her shoulders. Burying his nose in her hair he inhaled her scent. Syaoran had never felt so content in his life.

He listened to her breathing. When he was sure she was asleep, he was reluctant to do what he had to do. His stomach knotted with the pressure of his duties came back to remind his that he was a soldier first, a human second. Slowly and gently, he lifted his weight up and saw that she was asleep.

Her breathing was shallow, she was a light sleeper, so Syaoran had to be extra agile. He swiftly removed his arm from under her and rolled away. He backed away lightly, thankful she didn't stir in the slightest.

Out of the covers, he felt a chill.

He threw on some clothes, grabbed a small flashlight he kept in his jacket pocket and disappeared into the hallway.

The Kinomoto house wasn't that big, but he wouldn't be able to sweep it in one night. He started with the small library in her living room, scanning each book one by one. All post regime books, no good to him. Next, he went through every drawer in the kitchen. Nothing.

Every now and again he paused to hear for any movement upstairs. He positively couldn't let her catch him snooping. It would end everything. Syaoran didn't know which would be worse, being unable to investigate the Kinomoto house…or loosing whatever it was he and Sakura currently had.

Syaoran noticed from the corner of his eye, a door hidden beside the stairwell. He turned the nob, locked. Suspicious.

He tried again but the noise, he feared, would wake her up.

For now, he would leave it.

He felt a tinge of relief that he found nothing so far. But he was also conflicted. He needed info on Touya in order to advance the search on Tomoyo, but…he didn't want to find Sakura guilty of anything.

He was about to return when his eyes rested on the kitchen table. The table cloth was caught on something from under it. Syaoran peeled it back and saw that the table had a hidden drawer. The cloth had gotten snagged when Sakura hurriedly stashed away her notebook. Now Syaoran had found it.

As soon as he took the notebook out, he knew it had secrets. He flipped through the pages, not a lot of writing. He recognized it as Sakura's handwriting.

They were incoherent notes, but some word stuck out for him.

 _Bake sale, corruption, media investigation, bypass military authorization, Mirth, West_

Syaoran tapped his lip with his finger as he thought.

 _So she plans to go to the West somehow…. interesting._ He thought.

It didn't tell Syaoran a whole lot, but it had to mean something.

After he secured everything back exactly how it was, he crawled under the sheets and slid his arms around her. She rolled into him, eyes shut and tired.

He looked at her for a few more minutes, admiring every feature on her face.

 _You want to go into the West, do you?_ He thought. _I won't stop you. But I'll be watching you, very closely._

He caresses his suspicious lover and prayed that she was innocent. But if she wasn't, he couldn't be responsible for what would happen.

As sleep descended on Syaoran he once again kissed her head.

 _Dissident or not, she smells so damn good._

X x x


	12. Mirth and Merit

X x x

The evening sun and all its glory casted its final heat over Tomoyo.

A light breeze tousled some stands of her hair which mildly disturbed her nap. She stretched out on the old sun lounger and felt herself dip in and out of sleep.

 _I can get use to this._ She thought.

Inside, she could hear Ruby shuffling around making another batch of ice tea and humming. Just as Tomoyo drifted into another nap, she felt a cool shadow descend across her face. She furrowed her bros together and her eyes fluttered open to see the scowling face of Mrs Hiirigazawa.

Tomoyo groaned internally.

"Enjoying yourself?" She asked in a dissatisfied tone.

Tomoyo smirked and sat up straight. "Just taking a break." She said as politely as she could.

"You seem to take a lot of them." She replied sharply with her hands on her hips. Mrs Hiirigazawa had bit her tongue on commenting on Tomoyo's un-maid like behaviour. Mrs Hiirigazawa had sent many capable maids to work for Ruby, but they never lasted or got on with her. But for some reason, Tomoyo's blatant laziness and disregard for her role didn't bother Ruby. Tomoyo's company seemed to make her happy, and it irked Mrs Hiirigazawa.

At that moment Ruby came outside with a tray of ice tea.

"Oh! Mrs Hiirigazawa, do you want a glass?"

"No, this is only a flying visit. I've some good news for Madison."

Tomoyo's smirk collapsed. Whatever it was, it definitely wasn't good news.

"Oh?" Ruby said pouring a glass for Tomoyo and handing it to her. The atmosphere was tense.

"Yes." She said sweetly and placed her hand on Ruby's shoulder. "As it turns out I've suddenly become free during the mornings and afternoons so there will be no reason for Madison to continue working here."

Both Tomoyo and Ruby's faces dropped.

"And as it happens, they need more labour on the farms so Madison, you'll start first thing tomorrow!"

Tomoyo's mouth dropped as she tried to quickly conjure up a reply. Ruby stayed silent.

"There is really no need-" Tomoyo began.

"Oh no, I think it will be good for you. You need to make more friends, you're not very popular around here Madison."

She was right. Word spreads fast in the villages. People knew about Tomoyo's free ride here at the Hiirigazawa's house and they weren't impressed. Hard work is the highest virtue in the West, Tomoyo's reputation wasn't going down well.

"B-But Ruby, I-we I should be here-"

"Well, if you feel that strongly about it, you can come back here after work and do evening shifts here. There, settled. See you at dawn tomorrow."

She left before a fuming Tomoyo could utter another word of defiance.

X x x

Tomoyo had never stepped foot on a farm in her life.

As she imagined, it didn't appeal to her. She twisted her mouth and wrinkled her nose at the suspicious smells that were all around her. She was determined to find a way out of this work before it even began.

She barely managed to put herself in the work clothes they gave her, which had been worn by previous workers. The garments itched against her skin and she longed for the handmade silk gowns she once donned.

One thing she didn't turn her nose up at, was the view. The farms stretched for miles. Miles and miles of lush greens were cut off by the sudden drop of the cliffs where the eye could make out the sea. She was at the very Western point of Tomoeda, and so far from home.

"I'm too busy for this so I'm only going to explain this once." A scruffy looking man said to her. "In these fields, we farm 'Mirth' It looks like this." He said holding out a light hay coloured bud about two inches wide supported by a razor thin stalk. "Mirth is used for a number of things, feeding livestock, feeding ourselves, creating materials etcetera, etcetera. It's extremely useful but hard to grow so don't mess up plucking it." He said sternly.

Tomoyo suppressed a sigh and nodded lazily.

"So, when you pluck it, pinch from about two inches from the base and pull."

"Got it."

"Collect in the basket. When your basket is full, dump it in the containers over there." He said pointing to a large steel container a quarter of a mile away.

"This is your row. Finish to the halfway point by the end of the day."

Tomoyo's jaw dropped. "Are you serious? There's no way I can do all that in a day!"

"Listen, missy, if you're going to cause problems, then just leave. I don't have time for this." He said and stormed away.

Tomoyo balled her fists and suppressed a scream. She swiped up her basket and crouched down to the beginning of her row. Looking ahead she saw that the halfway point was at least half a mile ahead. And everyone had already started. She bit her lip and for the first time in her life, began to work.

X x x

After a week on the farm, Tomoyo felt like her body would break.

The work itself was gruelling and exhausting. The stalk of Mirth was like a razor and dug into her bard palm every time she plucked one. On the third day, she plucked too fast and blood tricked out of a paper-thin cut. But she had to go on.

She noticed other wore gloves but she wasn't offered any and denied a pair when she asked. She didn't realize how bad her reputation was. She was not included in on the banter between other workers and often ignored when asking a question. It didn't help that the Westerners spoke in a thick accent and used slang that made Tomoyo barely able to understand what they were saying.

At the end of the day, she saw the other labourers head towards the local pub while she was left there to finish her row, which she rarely did. She worked too slow, complained to often, argued with the bosses and took too many breaks and looked for any excuse to leave.

The work was made even more impossible by the cruel sun which beat on her everyday causing her to sweat profusely. The sweat stung her eyes and made her hands constantly sweaty which made picking Mirth that much more impossible.

It didn't help that she was going through serious withdrawls from drugs. She had been unwillingly clean for over a month.

On the fourth day, when everyone had finished and headed out to be sociable at the pub, she was left behind again to finish her work. When she was alone, she cried silently with the searing pain in her palms. Blisters had sprouted on her feet and palms. Her palm wound kept opening and bleeding out. She was no good at first aid, and the bandages she made were too shoddy to stay put. She didn't know how she could keep this going, she was at the end of her rope.

She heard rustling ahead of her and before she could look up there was a flashlight shone in her face. She squinted and waiting for another berating from a boss but there was silence. She glanced up and saw Eriol looking down at her in his usual expressionless stare.

Tomoyo tried to stand up but the pain in her feet crippled her back down. Of all people, she didn't want _him_ to see her like this. She wiped her running nose with the back of her hand and looked down. She gulped back tears. Eriol shone the flashlight from her face to her hands which glowed red with rawness. He moved the flashlight towards her row. She hadn't even finished a quarter of today's work.

Tomoyo wanted to say something to him to reinforced his fate in her. He wasn't looking at her with the same distain the other labourers did. She wanted to say something smart, something flirty but her brain was too tired to conjure up anything so she just sat there, silent.

Eriol turned away from her and walked away. Tomoyo felt a rock in the pit of her stomach. He couldn't even be in her presence. She felt this was her lowest point. However, sometime later he returned with something in his hand. He now had a lantern which he placed on the ground between them. In the soft glow she could see he was carrying a metal box.

He opened the box and took her by the wrist. She almost jumped away from him in shock. He tightened his grip slightly to keep her still. Flipping her hand over he poured water over it to rinse the dirt and blood. Tomoyo winced and bit her lip from crying again. He dried her hands and began to wrap a bandage around it. The texture of his hands were rough against her skin. She had no doubt that he did the gruelling work in his former years. He did the same with her other hand and Tomoyo began to feel some sort of relief. She stole glances of him.

She rarely saw him. He usually left the house before Tomoyo arrived and came back long after Tomoyo's work day was done. Recently she had been so overwhelmed with work, she didn't have the time to fantasize about him. She was pleasantly reminded of his features. His strong jaw, the defined muscled on his shoulders, his dark luscious hair. Tomoyo wanted to kiss him badly, she used to fantasize constantly about it and more. To wrap her arms and legs around him and do all sorts of things similar to the things she did in the palace with the soldiers.

Ruby face flashed in her head. Tomoyo was overcome with a strange feeling. Eriol was Ruby's husband. Ruby was Tomoyo's friend. Not that Tomoyo ever had many friends. Was is possible that Tomoyo felt…guilty about her infatuation for Eriol? It was strange, Tomoyo actually liked Ruby… it was a weird sensation…guilt. Tomoyo had never felt it before.

Tomoyo banished her lust for Eriol for the time being. It felt…wrong.

Eriol never looked at her once as he aided her. If he could feel Tomoyo's eyes on him or not, he ignored it. He threw the items back in the box and rose to leave. Tomoyo flexed her hand. The bandage was stiff but it provided relief.

"Thank you." She said.

He said nothing as he walked away towards the pub where the other locals were going to.

X x x

After another two days, Tomoyo needed to vent, she was frustrated and thought she'd explode.

That's why she ended up at Ruby's front door.

"It's bullshit!" Tomoyo whined and slumped onto the seat. "Complete bullshit! And the lunch they serve there tastes like garbage, not that they give you enough time to eat it."

Ruby patiently nodded and poured Tomoyo another cup of tea.

"Hang in there Madison, I'm sure Mrs Hiirigazawa will give you your old job back-"

"Oh don't get me started on her. She knew this would happen. I bet she told them all to treat me this way."

Ruby frowned and patted Tomoyo's hand. Though she didn't agree with everything Tomoyo was saying, she was glad to have the company.

"There, there, you can stay here tonight if you like."

Tomoyo didn't respond. She was caught up in her own thoughts and anger.

Ruby opened up the western paper and skimmed a few pages before landing on something that made her sigh.

"What?" Tomoyo asked, noticing her mood drop.

"Oh, nothing really." Ruby responded in a sad tone. "It's just…the school I started has upped their fees."

Tomoyo sat up with interest. "You started a school?"

"Yeah," Ruby said, delighted Tomoyo was not talking about herself. "An English school for kids who can't afford proper schooling. Our dialect is sometimes too difficult for Tomoedans across the wall to understand. Some kids here live too far from schools or work too much to go to school. So, I set up a school beside the labour farms so that kids could learn for an hour before and after work. It's so hard to advance anywhere in the West, especially if you can't speak English. I just wanted the kids to have a chance. I used to run it myself!"

"So…what happened to it? Why did you stop?"

Ruby's face dropped and her eyes sunk in sadness. "I got sick. I couldn't handle all the kids myself so I hired another girl to help me, then another. After sometime they saw me as a burden so…"

"They forced you to retire." Tomoyo said and Ruby nodded.

"Yeah. I don't mind that but…it's the fact they started to charge families a fee. Every year it goes up. It just defeats the purpose of it all. But what can I do?" She said laughing nervously and folding the paper closed.

Tomoyo felt a wave of tiredness fall on her.

"Wait, do you still own it? The school?"

"Well, the school is still technically in my name-"

"So take it back!"

"B-but I'm still sick and-"

"Oh pffft, who told you otherwise? Mrs Hiirigazawa? As if she's the best at making decisions." Tomoyo said holding up her wounded hands. "Go take it back and tell them how it is or else fire their asses!"

Ruby sat stunned. "But the walk takes an hour and-"

"Ugh, look do what you want. If you want stay caged in here all day because some old woman told you you're too fragile to have a life then do that. Otherwise just go and do it!"

Ruby felt Tomoyo's words resonate with her.

"You're right. I mean why can't I go there by myself? It is my school after all and-"

Ruby stopped when she noticed Tomoyo had passed out with exhaustion. She threw a quilt over Tomoyo and patted her head.

She smiled to herself. Madison had so much strength, so much determination sometimes. Ruby wished she'd apply that to her work.

X x x

Tomoyo didn't think her work life could get any worse, and then it did.

She was on her last shift of the week and was looking forward to two days of recovering her shattered body. She heaved the full basket of Mirth over her back. There were bruises on her spine from where the basket leaned.

In the blaring sun she trotted on, stopping now and again to catch her breath which gained evil looks from other workers. She had finally reached the end of her row and this was the final basket. As she went to tip the basket into the container, she overestimated the distance. Her arms began to shake and she tried to gain back her footing but failed. The basket tipped back and the contents spilled out behind her. Unable to hold the basket anymore she let it fall behind her.

The basket rolled into an approaching woman who, along with her own basket of Mirth, was knocked down.

"Fuck…" Tomoyo muttered to herself and checked if her wound had opened up again.

"Hey!" A voice roared from behind her.

Tomoyo rolled her eyes before turning to confront the disgruntles woman. Tomoyo was nervous to see a small crowd headed her way. The tutted and mumbled about how this was typical of her, how some of them had had enough of her.

"What the hell are you doing?!" Her boss roared when he came onto the scene. Before Tomoyo could answer he fired more questions at her. "How can you be so incompetent!? Pick it up! Pick it all up and go. I don't want to see you back here again! Go!" He roared.

"This work is impossible! You're setting ridiculous expectations it's like you want us to fail!"

"The only person not keeping up is you, we don't need you holding up our workload so leave!"

"How dare you speak to me like that! Do you know who I am?" She fumed.

"I don't care if you're the Queen of fucking Tomoeda. Go!"

Tomoyo twitched and held back. He was thundering and Tomoyo was too humiliated to retaliate. She stormed off without even returning the work clothes.

 _Fuck them._ She thought. _Fuck them, fuck working, fuck the West! I am the Princess of Tomoeda. I will NOT be treated like some fucking dirty peasant!_

She wanted to say this so badly, but it could go one of two ways. Either they would murder her, or laugh at her. She didn't want either result.

She huffed and tore down the dirt path she knew would take her to Ruby. She didn't know at what point Ruby became her source of comfort. But when the days were too much for her, Ruby was always there, ready to listen, no judgement. It was a funny relationship that Tomoyo never had before. Then it occurred to her, maybe this was what it was like to have a friend.

It wasn't long before she was at Ruby's door and without knocking she let herself in. She tore off her work cap and slammed the door shut. Whirling around she stopped in her tracks. She was not alone. Eriol and his mother turned around and looked at her. There was a tense atmosphere. Tomoyo gulped and opened her mouth to say something.

Before she could, Mrs Hiirigazawa walked across the room in three long strides and smacked Tomoyo right across the face with an open palm. Tomoyo stood in a state of shock.

Mrs Hiirigazawa's breathing was so erratic, Tomoyo thought she was going to go for another smack.

"You." She spat. "How dare you. You think you can just do and say as you please don't you? Don't you!?"

Tomoyo looked around the room to see if anyone else had registered Mrs Hiirigazawa's seemingly crazy outburst. But when her eyes met Eriol's, her blood froze. Eriol had a murderous look in his eyes and breathed in sharply through his nose to contain himself. She had never seen such expression in his eyes. He had his arms crossed and dug his fingers tight around his arms as if to keep himself under control.

Tomoyo snapped her mouth closed and wondered what she could have possible done to not only upset Mrs Hiirigazawa, but to have stirred Eriol into such controlled rage.

"What are you-"

"Mrs Hiirigazawa, please." Said a short man from behind her that Tomoyo hadn't seen. "With plenty of rest, Ruby's condition will stabilize."

"Ruby?" Tomoyo whispered, her heart starting to thump. "What happened to her?"

"You," Mrs Hiirigazawa spat in anger. "You happened. Why did you have to rile her up about all this nonsense about 'taking control' of the English school?"

"What? That was- that was just, a suggestion. I didn't mean for it to be-"

"Well she took your suggestion seriously and walked two miles in the blazing heat in _her_ condition."

"She…what?"

"And on the way back she collapsed in a coughing fit! If the neighbouring farmer hadn't come out to spread fertilizer at that moment and found her she- she could have-" Mrs Hiirigazawa chocked on her words and suppressed a sob. Tomoyo had never seen her so riled up.

"Mrs Hiirigazawa please, come outside and catch your breath, there's no use dwelling on this. Ruby was lucky, she will recover."

Mrs Hiirigazawa listened to the doctor and left, but not before turning back to Tomoyo to say; "You're not welcome back to this house ever again."

When the door shut behind them, Tomoyo could barely bring herself to look Eriol in the eye. When she did, she regretted it. He stood in the kitchen, his chest rising and falling. Tomoyo felt a mixture of fear, humiliation but worse of all, she was overcome by extreme guilt.

All this time Tomoyo was thinking of herself, she never fully registered the fragility of Ruby's state. Tomoyo thought of Ruby and that long walk in the blazing sun. If she wasn't found at that exact time, she could have…she could have.

Tomoyo felt a lump in her throat.

"I'm…sorry." She breathed so lightly she didn't think he would hear it.

Eriol stood there, saying nothing. But it wasn't his passive silence, Tomoyo knew he was controlling the urge to hit her.

In the awkwardness, she began to blab uncontrollably.

"In my defence, I-I didn't know she would do it. I- I just said it I didn't mean it! How was I supposed to know that she would...if I knew…then I wouldn't have…" Tomoyo's fingers shook as Eriol began to walk towards her very slowly.

He stopped a few feet away from her. Tomoyo thought he would hit her as his mother did. But he said nothing and kept her under his intense sapphire stare.

"Please say something." She whispered in desperation.

She saw his jaw clench and the corner of his mouth twitch down. He displayed more emotion in the past five minutes then in the entire time Tomoyo had been in the West.

"Why are you here?" He asked. The vibration of his voice produced goosebumps on her arms.

She gulped. "I-I-"

"You don't belong here. You're not one of us."

Tomoyo's breath caught. She never imagined how much that would sting.

"There is a bus that goes to the Eastern wall twice a day from the Main hall. I suggest you get on one of them tomorrow."

Tomoyo felt sick. He wanted her to leave. She was not welcome around his life anymore.

"But…it was…I made a mistake." She pleaded but couldn't get her feet to move.

"My wife nearly died today because of your mistake." He said balling his fists and angrily puffing his chest. Tomoyo felt tears prick in her eyes. "You don't know us, our ways and you certainly don't know my wife. You're a burden on the labour force and a burden on me. The only solution is for you to leave." He voice was rising the more he spoke.

Tomoyo recoiled as if he'd struck her. She thought she'd vomit.

"You…want me to…leave."

"You are of no use here, to anyone. Go back to where you came from." He dropped his hands to his side and left her. In the dark, Tomoyo felt her chest tighten.

Out of everything that has happened, Eriol's rejection was the final blow. She bubbled with and anger and humiliation. No one had ever made her feel this unworthy. Blinded by oncoming tears, Tomoyo burst through the front door and shot off down the dirt trail.

She broke into a run. She needed to get far away from that house, from him, from her mistake. Before she knew it, she had returned to the fields. Nobody was there, it was almost 11:00pm. Wind howled through the tall stalks of Mirth. She found herself walking through the Mirth fields, not stopping until she reached the edge of the cliff. She felt the wind push against her harder here.

She looked down and saw the waves tear across bedrock and smash against the cliff face. It was a long drop, it made her dizzy. Her knees gave way and she sunk into the cool grass. In the silence, she broke into tears. She couldn't remember the last time she cried and now, she couldn't stop.

 _It's not fair._ She whined.

How could they blame her for something like that? She didn't make Ruby leave that was her choice. How could they blame Tomoyo? Tomoyo cried her eyes raw and thought about where she went wrong. She had destroyed her chance of making a life in the West. Thoughts of returning to her former life seemed tempting. She could sleep in her own bed, wear fine gowns that treated her skin kindly and never, ever have to do labour again.

She shook her head. No, she couldn't go back, not after making it so far. She thought of her next move, where to go from here. That's when Tomoyo realized that she had nowhere else to go. She was at a dead end. Eriol didn't want her, the West didn't want her and she ran away from the place she was needed.

She had nowhere.

This realization was like a knife to the heart. She was alone.

She buried her head into her knees and through her tears she could hear the sea crashing against the cliff below her. Tomoyo raised her head and played with a dangerous thought. She crept slowly towards the edge. Her stomach dropped.

 _If I jumped, they'd regret it. They'd regret everything they said. And if my body washed up on the beach and is identified, my mother will regret everything she's ever done to me._

Tomoyo swung her legs over the cliffs edge. They dangled in the air and Tomoyo's heart raced. She had nowhere to go, no one that wanted her. She felt bitter. Her fingers dug into the grass as she played with the idea.

A sudden burst of wind knocked her back as if to stop her. As if suddenly coming to her senses, she swung her legs back and shuffled away from the cliffs edge.

 _How do I always end up in the situation?_ She thought. _Alone._

This feeling was too familiar. She had it when she ran headfirst into a stone wall, when she took too many pills, when she ran away from the asylum. Tomoyo bit her lip. She had run away from being a princess, now she was running away from being a peasant. She tried to understand herself. The look Mrs Hiirigazawa had given her, the ones her co-workers, Layla her servant and many other had given her.

Tomoyo decided for once in her life, she would be honest with herself. It couldn't be a coincidence that she kept ending up like this. She thought about what Layla had said once about Karma, something East Tomoedans believed in. There would be consequences to Tomoyo's actions. Perhaps…Tomoyo was to blame. Not Mrs Hiirigazawa, not her mother…just herself.

Tomoyo had blabbed to Ruby without even considering her condition. Ruby, one of the only people she considered a friend, almost died on Tomoyo's ill advise. And the way Eriol looked at her…

 _'_ _You don't know our ways, our people'_

"But how can I?" Tomoyo said allowed. "I'm not one of you."

She remembered something Ruby had said about how work was worth merit in the West. And that was something Tomoyo took for granted. For she knew she could have worked harder, could have been nicer, could have not taken advantage and have been such a… _princess._

Tomoyo frowned. She began to realize that she was here due to her own doing. Maybe Eriol was right, maybe she didn't belong in the West.

 _Now what?_ She asked herself.

She looked out onto the ocean. Killing herself was not the answer. She thought again about what Eriol had said, how she didn't belong here. She became angry. What did he know about her? About her potential? Nothing. He never tried to either.

Tomoyo rose to her feet. For the first time in her life she felt true humility and shame, she accepted it. She was determined to learn from it and become humble. Because Tomoyo knew she could be selfish, dismissive, cunning and sly. They weren't necessarily good traits all the time. But she was also proud. And she would not let Eriol Hiirigazawa or his mother determine her worth.

"Hmpf," She smirked and wiped one remaining tear from the corner of her eye. "We'll see who is unworthy. Don't you know who I am?"

She'd show them.

She'd show them all.

X X X

 **Thanks for the reviews lately! Their lives will start to intertwine in the next few chapters! (I know I said that last time)**

 **Thanks for reading!**


	13. Content

It was barely dawn when something stirred Sakura out of her sleep.

She stretched and rolled onto her back. Her eyes, content with falling back to sleep, did not open. Something touched her lightly on the cheek. Her eyes shot open in fright.

Syaoran caught her wrist and kissed it.

She flinched.

Her eyes settled on Syaoran leaning over her. His eyes were reserved, waiting for her reaction. Sakura blinked heavily rested her palm on his cheek.

She smiled.

"Morning." She whispered and teased her finger through his hair. Hey eyes flickered to the clock. It was 5:48 a.m. "Barely."

Rays of dawn were struggling to pierce through her curtains and there was not a sound of life outside.

Syaoran leaned down and kissed her softly. "I'm sorry, I really have to go." He said with regret.

Sakura wiped her tired eyes and sat up. Realizing her nakedness, she wrapped the duvet across her chest.

"It's so early." She mumbled in some sort of protest.

Syaoran chuckled and patted down the wild strands of her hair. She noticed then that he was already in his uniform with the exception of his jacket.

"I have to be back at base before 7. I don't want to raise suspicion." He said and grazed her naked shoulder with the back of his fingers. Sakura welcomed the touched. She was surprised at the neediness she felt at that moment. She didn't want him to go. The night they spent together was the best night's sleep she has had in a long time.

"That's probably for the best." She said and casted her eyes downwards to hide her disappointment.

She squeaked when he scooped her up and sat her on his knee. She barely kept her blanked over her when he assaulted her with kisses and ran his hands up her naked leg.

"Stop pretending." He said and nudged his forehead of hers. "You'll miss me."

Sakura couldn't conceal a smile. "Perhaps." She whispered and slid her arms around his neck. She buried her head into his neck, embracing his smell.

"When does your father come back?" He asked and embraced her tightly.

"Today, around 4pm."

"When can I see you again?" He asked low into her ear which made her tremble with silent excitement.

She pulled back to face him. "I'm not sure. My father doesn't go away on business much, and I'm not working at base anymore…"

"Meet me Monday? After work?"

"But how? I can't go strolling back into base-"

"I'll find you."

She pressed her mouth to his shoulder and hid a smile and mumbled an 'ok'.

Sakura brushed her fingers against his neck and listened to his breathing until eventually he planted a small kiss on her head and lowered his arms, signalling he must leave.

She watched him as he put his jacket on. She felt sadness as the man who held her last night began to fade and now he stood a soldier in front of her.

He kneeled in front of her.

"Monday?" He said again, trying to assure her answer.

She searched her eyes to find the Syaoran who whispered sweet words as he made love to her last night. In his amber eyes, she easily found the subtle fire that blazed behind them.

She nodded. "Monday."

He brought her down to kiss him again before leaving her.

She stayed upright in her bed, listening to his footsteps as he descended the stairs. Syaoran put on his boots and placed his cap firmly on his head. His hand touched the door knob but hesitated. He turned his head to see Fujitaka's office tightly shut. Syaoran gut was telling him it had answers. He could get a search warrant without any hesitation…but he wanted to treat this lightly. His eyes flickered upstairs to where she would be warmly under the covers.

For now, while she was not under immediate suspicion, he would tread lightly.

When Sakura heard the front door close she fell back onto her bed. Wrapping he naked body up in the blankets her thoughts repeated the passionate night. A faint smile teased on her face. Then all too sudden, it vanished.

She bolted upright. Shaking her head to rid romantic thoughts, she turned to her mission. She had a job to do.

X x x

They watched her for a long time, unsure of what to make of it.

"She's been like this for about three weeks." He said. "Not missed a day."

Mrs Hiirigazawa had her arms crossed and puckered her lips. She too, wasn't sure of what to say.

Part of her felt sorry for the poor girl, lugging around heavy baskets of Mirth for almost twenty-one days straight. The other part of her was annoyed, annoyed that Madison didn't just leave after the incident with Ruby.

"How is Ruby?" The man asked her, as if reading her thoughts.

Without looking at him she replied. "She's fairing much better, although she's still insisting she leaves the house more often. No doubt thanks to our 'hard little worker' over there." Mrs Hiirigazawa said nodding at Tomoyo.

"Why is she still here?" She asked.

The man shrugged. "I don't know ma'am. She showed up the day after I fired her. I told her to leave, and she asked if she could at least finish her row. She did, then she came the next day, and the next. She's still too slow, but keeps her head down and isn't too lippy. Only rests for ten minutes at a time then goes back to work."

"Hmpf."

"You're wasting wages we don't have on a useless worker."

"That's the thing ma'am, I've not been paying her."

"What? She's received no waged for the past three weeks?" Mrs Hiiriggazawa said in shock.

"That's right."

Mrs Hiirigazawa watched Tomoyo work silently under the relentless heat. She tugged at the Mirth despite glowing redness in her hands. She wondered how she could keep working without gloves. She must have even been in the same clothes for all this time.

"Madison?" Tomoyo spine straightened when she heard her fake name. She gulped and brought herself to look up.

"Ruby." She said faintly and felt her stomach knot in shame. Ruby stood with a bright smile, giving away no feeling of anger or resentment, as Tomoyo thought she deserved.

Tomoyo was relieved to see Ruby looking healthier. She was wearing a pale green dress and a straw sun hat. She looked like a character out of a children's novel with her feathery light brown hair and the faint freckled which dotted her cheeks.

"You're ok." Tomoyo commented.

"Looks like it." Ruby said and beamed a hearty smile. "Although I am upset that you haven't come by to see me in such a long time."

Tomoyo looked down at her dirtied hands. Ruby obviously wasn't aware that her husband and mother-in-law had banned her from going near Ruby or her home.

"Work." She offered as a poor excuse. "I'm sorry."

Ruby shrugged and swayed from side to side. She was oddly cheerier and breezier than Tomoyo had seen her before. "I've missed you."

Tomoyo felt a lump in her throat. She missed Ruby terribly, too. And she had thought of stopping by, but the look of hatred Eriol had left her with last time had kept her far away.

"Yeah, same."

"Great!" Ruby said clapping her hands together. "Then come by tomorrow! I want to have a catch up. No excuses!"

Tomoyo bit her lip. She couldn't say no. Not without exposing what Eriol and Mrs. Hiirigazawa had warned her of. Tomoyo nodded.

"How come you're here?" She asked, noticing that Ruby wasn't chaperoned around like she usually was.

Ruby leaned in and whispered. "I did what you said. I told them all to back off! I'm a grown woman and I'm not gonna be treated like a child. What can they do about it? Restrain me?" She laughed lightly which made Tomoyo's heart swell with pride that Ruby had finally stood up for herself.

"Of course, that husband of mine protested." She said rolling her eyes. "Men, right?" She teased.

Tomoyo forced a laugh and ignored the constricting feeling in her chest.

"I better get going." Ruby said. "Tomorrow then?"

Tomoyo nodded, "Yeah, tomorrow."

"Just kick her out." Mrs Hiirigazawa snarled as she watched Ruby skip away from Tomoyo. Since Ruby's health improved, she has been more outspoken, challenging Mrs Hiirigazawa's decision in her health, insisting that she go where she wishes against doctors' orders, she was indeed, more independent, much to Eriol's worries. "Madison is doing no good here."

"Look, ma'am, I would but…you know more than anyone that the military is demanding more than ever. I can't afford to lose a single pair of hands. Even if they're slow hands."

Mrs Hiirigazawa was going to protest more about the girl when she heard the unmistakable sound of military vans rolling their way.

"Take cover, ma'am." He whispered to her and Mrs Hiirigazawa vanished into the equipment shed.

Tomoyo kept her head down, unobservant to the approaching two vans coming towards the fields. She wiped the sweat off her forehead and sighed. Her dizzy spells were becoming more and more frequent. She was surviving only on water and the free porridge they provided at the main village. The little money she had was already spent.

She had not been near the Hiirigazawa house since the incident that almost led to her death. Tomoyo was too ashamed. But she used that shame as fuel to keep working. Although, her determination to work has not changed her situation; she was still excluded by the rest of the villagers.

She plucked more Mirth and dumped it into a basket she was sharing with one of the children. They collectively used the basket but it was Tomoyo who lugged it to the vat.

Two soldiers stepped out from the van. From behind them, Lieutenant Colonel Mizuki climbed out and took a minute to cast her eye around the workers. Without a word, she signalled the other two soldiers to go and inspect.

The rest of the workers kept their heads down and tried to act normal, though the soldier's presence was heavy and intimidating. A child with light blond hair bumped into the soldier on duty. The soldier's eyes narrowed and he bit down on his cigarette in annoyance.

"S-s-sorry." The boy stuttered and backed away.

The looked down at the tiny child, at his dirtied cheeks and sunken eyes. He grimaced in disgust.

"You should take better care of where you are going, little boy."

The soldier puffed his cigarette and planted his boot on the side of the basket. With a sly smirk he pushed it over. A day's work of Mirth and dirt tumbled from it, causing an awful racket.

Tomoyo flinched swerved her head behind her. She stared blankly at her days work scattered at her feet.

"Here's a little lesson, so you'll never forget this little mistake." The soldier raised his rifle up and began to slam it down on the boy's face.

"Hey!" She barked and bolted to her feet. The soldier's arms froze mid-action.

Her jaw clenched and an anger redder than her palms ceased control of her. The plank of patience she had maintained over the past few weeks had finally snapped.

The soldier flinched at the harshness of her voice. He had no time to react to Tomoyo's outburst before she had closed the gap between them and swiped her palm so fiercely across his cheek that Mrs Hiirigazawa could heard it from the other side of the field.

The cigarette was spat out of the soldier's mouth upon impact. The was the unmistakable cluster of gasps that escaped from the other farmers.

"Do you have any idea how long it took me to do all of that? What the fuck is wrong with you, you imbecile!? Were you raised in a dog house or can your tiny brain not comprehend what we-"

Tomoyo's rant came to an abrupt halt when she realized all eyes were on her. The reality of what she had just done had crashed over her head. Two alerts sounded off in her mind.

The first; she had just assaulted a soldier.

The second; she feared that by exposing her face, she had given away her identity.

All around her was silent as the other labourers waited for some form of punishment to befall her. The small child at her side stared wide-eyed with awe at the woman who towered above the soldier. Tomoyo lowered her hand, which had been prepared for a second assault. The faces all around her glanced back in horror and shock. And then she saw Eriol, who stood wide eyed. For a second, she felt Princess Tomoyo, the one who could get away with almost anything, return. But she wasn't the princess now, she was a peasant, and she was in big trouble.

"I-…Apologies." Tomoyo could not conjure up another thing to say.

The soldier touched his cheek, which began to stain a deep pink. He snickered darkly and in a second he brought the butt of his rifle down on her. Tomoyo immediately collapsed backwards. When she sat up she felt her mouth instantly flood with blood. The pain came a second later. No one came to her aid. Everyone was rooted to their place, no one dared to intervene.

"Stupid bitch." The soldier hissed and with shaking hands he fumbled with the rifle and brought the barrel to her face.

Words were caught in Tomoyo's throat and she squeezed her eyes in anticipation of a bang.

"Thompson." Mizuki called in a bored voice. "That's enough." Mizuki was signing documents on a clipboard, not giving the violent situation any attention.

"With all due respect, General Lieutenant, the wench hit me."

"Yes," She said thrusting the clipboard into the labour boss's hands. "An embarrassment you can take home with you today. Maybe you should work on your agility more."

The other soldier snickered at his college. The soldier looked down at Tomoyo and clenched his jaw. He reluctantly brought the rifle from Tomoyo's face. In a last act of pettiness, he spat on her face. Tomoyo was too caught up in fear to even wipe it from her cheeks.

"Your behind on stock." Mizuki said before climbing into the van. "See to it that you catch up." She said in a monotone voice.

"Yes, Lieutenant General." Said the labour boss.

The vans drove off but no one could resume their work. No one could deny what just happened. Eriol watched Tomoyo, his heart rate trying to de-escalate. He watched, as she spat blood from her mouth and wiped the nasty spit of the soldier from her cheek. He waited for her face, which had paled, to break into tears. But it didn't.

Instead, Tomoyo wiped her face with her dress, which was soaked in sweat and dirt of the past few weeks, returned to her row and in a stunning display of irreverence, resumed working.

Eriol finally caught his breathing.

From behind her, his mother walked to his side.

"Stupid, stupid girl…" She whispered, her own voice giving away awe to Tomoyo's actions.

Eriol just nodded, but his lips remained parted in shock.

 _Stupid…stupid…brave girl…._ He thought.

Though Tomoyo had said nothing and resumed her work, no one else could do so naturally.

"E-excuse me." Said a woman who approached Tomoyo.

Tomoyo's eyes flickered upwards, she'd never been approached by the other members of the labour force.

"Madison, isn't it?" She asked when Tomoyo didn't reply.

Tomoyo just nodded and kept her head low. She regretted what she did. She would definitely be harshly excommunicated for sure. They would practically drag her across the wall this time.

"Madison…thank you so much." The woman croaked as tears filled her eyes.

Tomoyo raised an eyebrow and sat back.

"For what?"

Despite her tears the woman broke into a smile and brought the young boy into her arms. "For protecting my boy. For intervening on his behalf. If you hadn't who know what that dirtbag might have done!"

The little blonde boy thrust his arms around Tomoyo's neck. She stiffened and clenched her fists, for she had absolutely no idea what the woman was talking about. At the time, Tomoyo saw only red, she did not see any boy, nor did she do what she did in order to protect him. But it seemed the villagers had mistaken her violent outburst as an act of heroism. The boy loosened his arms and planted a small kiss on Tomoyo's cheek.

When she looked around, the others were smiling. This was a good thing, Tomoyo knew better than to deny their assumptions.

"Well, I couldn't just stand by…" She said with a tight smile.

"Did you see her mom, she Madison was like, 'bam'!" The boy squealed and imitated Tomoyo's slap which created laughter among the workers. Many people came up to praise Tomoyo. She responded with awkward thank yous. Only ten minutes ago, these people had ignored her existence, and yet now she stands as a hero.

"That was without a doubt, the stupidest thing anyone has ever done." Mrs Hiirigazawa said with dissatisfaction. Tomoyo felt the previous praise deflate. Of course, Mrs Hiirigazawa wouldn't allow such praise to linger.

"But…it was also the bravest thing I've witnessed in a long time." She said with a touch of humour that nearly winded Tomoyo.

"Careful, Mrs Hiirigazawa, that almost sounded like praise." Tomoyo responded cocking her head to the side.

Mrs Hiirigazawa smirked. "As you were." She said, signalling to the other workers to resume work.

"Not you." She said which made Tomoyo groan. Perhaps she wasn't getting away with it. "I don't think it's fair that the others have to witness the sight of you in those gaudy clothes and unwashed hair."

Tomoyo nodded and kept her eyes down.

"I'm sure there are spare clothes in the equipment shed, just ask Lottie, she'll sort you out. Also I believe you're owed a backlog of wages. I'll try to see that they get to you by this evening."

Tomoyo gulped.

"One last thing. You should wear these," She said, extending gloves to her. "Those hands of yours are an eyesore. Use these to work from now on."

Tomoyo took them with shaking hands. It took a lot for her to remain composed. This one small gesture had a huge meaning. She was being accepted now. One of them.

"Go home. I think you deserve the weekend off." She said and walked away.

"Are you coming to 'The Shandy' tonight? We usually go there some nights after work, just to relax and have a drink. You'll join us, won't you?" The mother asked Tomoyo.

Tomoyo nodded, unable for words. She knew of their nights of community drinking, but was never invited. She would not refuse the invitation.

As Tomoyo stood clutching the gloves in hand, Eriol couldn't take his eyes from her. He watched as she brought the gloves to her face to either wipe tears or say prayers. Eriol felt something stir inside of him. He would never be able to erase that event from his mind. He would never forget how Tomoyo stood inches from a soldier's face, without fear, without doubt, just the pure bravery that Eriol almost wished he had. She had done only what he dreamed to do.

Perhaps he had underestimated her. But above all these feelings, he feared his own cowardly actions. He feared that in the absence of coming to Tomoyo's defence, he had exposed his own weakness.

The girl named, Madison…she had his respect, whether he'd admit it or not.

X x x

Passage from Nathala B. Omerson's Diary

 _Mahr Bratain_

 _In English, it translates as 'Poets Gate'_

 _But of course, that name has been fading in usage in favour of simply naming this once proud place of rich culture, 'The East'._

 _Us Easterners are a very proud people. And why shouldn't we be? We were the producers of Tomoeda's greatest musicians, poets and artists. We boasted the culture capital of Tomoeda. We were the expressionists, the questioners and the dreamers. Poet's Gate was truly, a world of fantasy, harmony and liberation._

 _With this in mind, it is understandable to say that we lost a great deal during the Regime._

 _We lost our culture, our music, our art, our words… and almost, our language._

 _We speak broken English under the command of conformism and hush our beautiful language under the safety of our roofs._

 _Our books, burned, our literature, banned. Our journalists, removed. And our culture, weeded out._

 _I would do anything to see the walls that have sectioned the East, crumble, and the former glory of Mahr Bratain, returned. And with it, the spirit of a once proud people._

X x x

Sakura could not keep her nerves under control.

Her fingers hovered over the keyboard but were unwilling to work. All around her, heads were bowed down, deep in work. Sakura couldn't concentrate.

She glanced at the large clock on the wall.

It had been three hours since she submitted her article, her 'idea'. So far, no one had come to her to speak about it. She grew more nervous by the second. Should she have approached it more directly instead of in e-mail? She should have approached him personally.

She looked up again at Yue's office, but the blinds were firmly shut, giving away no sign of movement.

Sakura sighed and buried her head in her hands. She shouldn't be idling, she had work to do, articles to edit. But her reasoning for being here rested on the reaction of higher ups.

"Kinomoto."

Sakura jumped back in her seat.

Yue stood in front of her desk, arms by his side and clutching documents. Perhaps her submission.

"Good morning sir-"

"My office." He said and left.

Sakura followed in his footsteps. Her palms were sweating and her heart began to thud in her head.

Yue's office sat on the second floor overlooking the huge office. Sakura's knees shook as she followed him upstairs and shut his office door behind him. His office was extremely simple. Grey walls, large office desk, two chairs and a book shelf. In the corner, Naoko, his secretary typed quickly, glancing at Sakura for a brief second and continuing as if she wasn't there.

He sat in his chair and signalled for her to take the seat in front of her desk.

Sakura bit her lip in anticipation. The only sound was Naoko's face paced typing.

Yue crossed his arms and looked at her for the longest time. Sakura bit her tongue, she knew she shouldn't be the first to speak.

"I have a long list of things I have to do Ms Kinomoto. This job is very demanding, beyond mere editing."

Sakura nodded.

"One thing, I didn't think I'd have to deal with, is a rogue intern." He said and tossed Sakura's earlier article submission onto the desk.

Sakura swallowed. So, he had read it.

"You had but the simplest job. Write a short summery of some bake sale that would slot into the back pages where nobody would even glance at it. Instead…you gave this." He said raising an eyebrow.

"I'm really searching for a reason not to fire you, Ms Kinomoto."

He didn't seem angry, just annoyed. Sakura preferred it that way.

"I am going to give you one chance to explain yourself, and the content written in this article. And it better be a good explanation, or it will cost you your job."

Sakura's mouth became dry. But she had to convince him now. It meant more to her than the Tomoedan Mirror.

"I did initially write what I was told…but I discarded it in favour of a more…interesting story."

"So, you disobeyed a direct order, from me, in favour of some gut feeling."

"I didn't mean to offend. It's just, I saw an opportunity that could…" Sakura forced the next words from her mouth. "benefit Utopia."

Yue said nothing and let her go on. Naoko had stopped typing. She too, was curious of this 'opportunity'.

"I heard that there were some rumours that were effecting the sales of Eastern products within the East. Many people believe that the westerners…spoil the products before it's shipped to the East."

"So, you wrote this based of hearsay."

"Not at all. I did the research. Trade between the West and East is continuing to decline over the past three years. People on the Eastern side of the wall are losing trust in specific western products. Not only that, but it's creating tensions to relationships on both sides of the walls."

Yue crossed his arms and raised an eyebrow. Naoko's eyes bulged behind her glasses and her head went from Yue to Sakura. "And what do you plan to do to stop it? " He asked.

"A full coverage story. In depth interviews with the western civilians themselves. We can show how the product is made from farm to table and every process involved. If done right, we can restore the East and West relations. Which of course, is important coming up to 'Utopia day', isn't it?"

Sakura's heart was beating so fast, but her face remained determined, giving away no hesitance or doubt.

"And I suppose you will be the person carrying out these interviews?" Yue asked and tilted his head to the side.

"I think people would trust it more coming from a citizen of the East. People in the East don't…understand the West or it's culture. If we can educate them on it, they will have a clearer understanding of it. Easterners are very conservative people. They don't trust what they don't know. As you know yourself." She took a gamble with that last sentence.

Yue raised his eyebrow and stared at her intensely. He held his gaze, not backing down. He could see it, he could see _him_ in her eyes. She had his determination, his strength. There was no doubt that she was a Kinomoto.

"The west can be a dangerous place. How will you report on any… unpleasantries that you may encounter?" he challenged.

"Well, if that were the case…then we would just have to omit those parts…wouldn't we?" Sakura felt her gut twist when she said this. But she had to convince him this was for Utopia, that she was determined to do what was necessary for Tomoeda.

"I'll think it through." He said after a moment.

Those four words made her giddy with hope. He was considering it.

"Even if I agree, I can't ensure that 'Base' will give you a temporary visa, given your family history, of course." He said bluntly.

"I understand."

"Sir," Naoko whispered. "Are you sure that's a good idea?"

"Back to your desk." Yue said, ignoring her. "And Kinomoto," He said, narrowing his eyes which froze Sakura to her seat. "Don't ever disobey and order like that again. Are we clear?"

"…Yes, sir." She said before rising out of her chair with shaky legs.

Nobody watched her as she returned to her seat. She felt wobbly and light-headed. She pushed herself to finish her edits and drove away the thoughts flooding into her head.

X x x

Yue went to the small balcony and lit up a cigarette.

He inhaled and held the smoke in his lungs for a while and slowly exhaled. In his other hand, he twirled his phone slowly in his hand, pondering on how to approach this.

He didn't expect Sakura to act so brazenly. It scared him, but it also lit a fire under him. He looked out onto the clean square houses of the south, with their lush gardens and Southern flag flapping unashamedly in the wind.

He thought about calling _him_ first, but decided against it. He was being needy now, he had to give him space to do his thing. Instead he dialled a different number.

There was something he needed to know.

X x x

Syaoran was in a ridiculously good mood.

It was only eleven-thirty but he was powering through work more efficiently than ever. Enough for Mizuki to even give a brief nod of approval.

He knew why. It was Sakura. When his mind naturally wandered to her, he struggled to conceal a smile. It had only been two days since he'd seen her, but he was already planning on how he'd find her again without arousing suspicion.

Syaoran left his office and went for an early office, opting to take the longer route to where the cadets were training. To his surprise, training was the only thing they were not doing.

As Syaoran neared the fence of the training field he saw the cadets lazing around. Some were stretched out basking in the sun's rays, other sitting in groups on the ground chatting like they were on recess in high school. This stunned Syaoran. The cadets were to be professional at all times. His father would have a stoke if he saw such a sight.

One of the cadets saw him and bolted up, signalling the other to do the same. Syaoran scanned the cadets until he located Chiharu.

He signalled her over.

"What the hell are you all doing?" He asked her through the fence.

Chiharu wasn't even wearing her uniform jacket. They should be in the middle of morning drills.

Cadet Chiharu shrugged. "Sorry, sir but we don't really know what to be doing. No one is supervising us."

"What? Where is Lieutenant Meiling?"

Cadet Chiharu casted her eyes away in guilt and shrugged. "Lieutenant Li hasn't shown up before ten at the latest."

"Are you serious? Why?"

Cadet Chiharu gulped kept her lips pressed firmly together. Syaoran knew she was keeping something from him.

"Chiharu-"

Chiharu's spine snapped straight and she backed away from the fence.

"She's here, I better go. She'll kill me again if I'm seen talking again."

Syaoran looked over to where Meiling was coming from. Meiling, who was usually the shining example of what a Lieutenant should look like, trudged onto the training field looking like she had a rough night.

The Cadets fell into sharp rows in front of her and saluted. Meiling snarled her lip and gave a pathetic wave off as signal to start their training. She then sat on a bench under the shade and threw her head into her hands.

"Hangover." Said one of the lower ranking soldiers who came up beside him. "Apparently Lieutenant Li has been hitting the soldiers bar pretty hard these past few nights." He said with a sneer that pissed Syaoran off.

"Something you need, Lieutenant?" He said, ignoring what he said.

"Um, yes sir. I've been instructed to tell you that you must go to the West tonight and address the representative of the West. Formalities, I suppose."

Syaoran nodded but kept his eyes on Meiling, who looked like she aged since she had her case removed from her and given to Syaoran.

"Understood."

"Also, Tsukishiro Yue from the _'Tomoedan Mirror'_ is on the phone for you. Should I tell him to call back?"

Syaoran furrowed his brow, he wasn't expecting any calls from Yue. It was unusual to even hear from him.

"No, I'll take it."

X x x

"Yue."

"Sorry to call you over such a trivial matter Lieutenant Colonel, but there is something I wish to speak to you about."

"Involving what?"

"Involving Ms. Kinomoto Sakura."

Syaoran's spine stiffened at the mention of her name. There was a brief pause before Syaoran replied. "What about her?"

"She's currently doing an internship here at the ' _Tomoedan Mirror',_ She's shown potential, but I'm weary."

Syaoran leaned back in his chair and rubbed his cheek. He prayed she didn't do anything stupid before he could intervene.

"What exactly are you weary about?"

"She's doing a special expose on the West. Before I apply for her visa, I wanted to know what you thought about it. Given her family's history…do you think it's wise to allow her into the west?"

Syaoran clenched his jaw. So, she was determined to go through with it. Syaoran pinched his chin and weighed up his options. Yue was a trusted man, very dedicated to Tomoeda. If he had suspicions about Sakura, he'd have cut her off immediately. The thought of her going into the West worried him, but it may also lead him to better answers.

"I don't think you need to worry. She has the all clear." Syaoran lied. He didn't want to give Yue his full opinion yet. "But, I will have some military escort her around while she's there. And don't worry about the visa, I'll have that approved by tomorrow."

Yue was silent on the other end of the phone.

"Understood." He said before hanging up.

Syaoran hung up. He rubbed his tired eyes and pulled out the article he was reading yesterday. He glanced at it and felt his mind ping pong from one opinion to the other.

Kinomoto Sakura….

He just couldn't make his mind up about her.

The article in his hands was probably one of very few copies in all of Tomoeda. He read the headline.

 _'_ _Sex, silence and bribery; The Working Woman's Work Dilemma - written by Kinomoto Sakura._

Syaoran read the article again that Sakura had written during her University years. Incidentally, it was the last one she wrote before dropping out of her course and switching majors. She wrote passionately about how a girl, Kimura Nene, was sexually assaulted during an interview for an internship.

The assaulter, a higher up from the South, walked away without any charges. It was one out of hundreds of examples where Eastern women were assaulted in order to get higher status. Some accepted it, others who rejected or spoke out about it, faced consequences. She blamed the government for not intervening, that was her mistake.

Her article was blacklisted, she was banned from writing for the University again. It went against Utopia to criticise it's government. Syaoran made an oath when he joined the military to uphold and protect Tomoeda from such slander.

But his heart tugged at him…

Because somewhere in his mind he knew…she was right.

X x x

Eriol's thoughts were circling around too many things. Ruby was running out of medication, Touya was becoming even more insufferable and the pressure to assure the villagers everything was alright was too much to deal with alone. He stared into his glass, unable to soak up the lively atmosphere around him.

The bar was filled with regulars. Men sang songs and tables were crowded with people slugging back their beers with smiles and laughter. The lighting was a mix of candles and bulbs which casted a warm and welcoming glow. Even the woman had cast away their working clothes in favour of gossip and chatter.

"This seat taken?" He heard from beside him.

He looked up. Tomoyo stood beside him with a coy smile that betrayed other intentions. She looked better than she did earlier. Her hair was let down, cut off at the shoulders and eating decent meals again gave her skin a good glow. Before she came the ladies in the dormitory had given her a simple grey dress. Tomoyo thought it as royalty in comparison to the rags she wore nonstop over the past three weeks.

Eriol said nothing for a second. Of course, he hadn't forgotten about her. Even when he tried.

"Help yourself." He said.

Tomoyo slid into the seat beside him. He continued to stare into his glass, not in the mood to converse with her. Tomoyo smiled wickedly to herself, she was determined he wouldn't ignore her this time.

"So, I don't know if you've heard, but I'm kind of a big deal now. Some people are even saying I'm a hero." She said twirling a piece of hair around her finger and waiting for his response.

Eriol couldn't help but to smirk. "Yeah, I've heard. Do you want some praise?"

Tomoyo's breath caught when he smiled. He seemed to be loosening up around her. This encouraged her to continue.

"Praise? No, that wouldn't really be like you." She teased and tilted her head to the side. "What I would like, however, is to buy you a drink."

Eriol raised an eyebrow. He was humoured by her. He laughed and shook his head.

"And why do you want to do that?"

Tomoyo flicked her hair and puffed her chest out with pride. "Hmm, you're really not up to date on me. That's disappointing. I'm a rich woman now. I've just received three weeks of wages, I feel like sharing the love."

Eriol scratched his neck and sighed with a smile.

"I'm taking that as a yes." She beamed and called over the barman.

Eriol noticed the red pigment still glowing under her palms. There were scars between her fingers as evidence of her hard work over the past three weeks. The corner of her lip showed signs of deep bruising that was yet to come after the soldier's attack. In the pit of his stomach he wondered if she went through this suffering because of what he said to her.

And yet, there she stood as poised and undefeated as ever. He knew, he was wrong about her. He felt guilty.

Two beers were placed before them and Tomoyo lifted hers to cheers.

"What's the occasion?"

"No occasion. Just two friends, sharing a drink together."

"We're friends?" He asked raising his eyebrow with a humoured smile.

"I certainly hope so." She said leaning her head in.

He said nothing and clinked his glass against hers.

Tomoyo smiled winningly. She was breaking him down slowly. Tomoyo humoured him with her blunt manner. With every question and reply he gave her, she sank into a warmer bliss. She was caught up in he gave the slightest of nods as she spoke to indicate he was listening, how he looked directly at her when he spoke, the small twitches of his mouth when he was trying not to laugh at something she said.

"Ow," Tomoyo winced at the small pain in her hand. Her right hand was healing slower than the left.

Before she could look at it, Eriol had taken it into his.

He lightly traced his fingers over the healing cuts. Her hands were so thin and delicate, Eriol sighed thinking about the torture she put herself through in the fields with no protection wear. He couldn't imagine Ruby doing something like that in her delicate position. Then again, he thought, Tomoyo was not like Ruby. No, they were very different.

"Why did you do it? Work so hard?" He asked keeping his eyes on her hand.

Tomoyo struggled to answer. She went into shock at his touch. Her delicate hand began to subtly shake in his rough tanned hand. He was touching her. She gulped.

"I…wanted you to accept me…no matter what." She whispered, her voice almost lost in the background chatter of drunk men and woman.

Eriol looked up. Her answer made him feel uncomfortable, but he kept her hand in his. He never saw eyes so icy and blue like hers. They were delicate, but also fearless, enough to stare down any soldier.

Coming back to reality, Eriol let her hand go and grabbed his drink to escape that awkward moment.

Tomoyo flinched and tried to explain herself in a way that made her seem less desperate. "When I say _you_ , I meant, the village, everyone." She muttered and grabbed her drink.

Awkwardness fell between them. Was it obvious that Tomoyo lusted over him? She didn't come over with that intention. She just wanted him to…not hate her anymore. Perhaps she'd done the opposite.

"We do." He said after a while.

Tomoyo looked over with a confused expression.

"We do…accept you here now. Well, at least, I do." He muttered.

Tomoyo concealed her smile into her glass. She told her heart to stop racing and remain composed. The hard work had finally paid off. Tomoyo felt the sting of jealousy, how Ruby could see him, hold his whenever she wanted.

The moment of awkwardness had passed between them but had not gone unnoticed by Touya, who watched silently from across the bar and witnessed the suspiciously tender moment between them. Touya smirked to himself. This was an unexpected twist, one that could possibly work in his favour.

Suddenly the front door of the bar burst open.

"Military! Military is on the way here!" Someone shouted.

Sighs and mumbled filled the room as everyone instinctively put their heads down.

"How many?" Someone asked.

"Not many, just one military car."

That was enough for Touya to decide to leave. He couldn't be risked getting caught. He was not alone. Mrs Hiiirigazawa too, made a speedy exit. As this was happening, Tomoyo swerved her head around. She couldn't get caught either. She began to panic. The side door was too far away and crowded to get to. The military would come through the front door at any second.

Eriol registered her panic and grabbed her by the elbow. "What's wrong?"

Tomoyo gulped, her hands began a light quiver. She couldn't tell Eriol for obvious reasons, but she had to get out.

When she didn't respond, Eriol tugged her elbow and she followed towards the end of the bar, where Eriol opened up a closet door.

"Just keep quiet, they won't check in here."

Tomoyo obeyed and got into the closet, which was very narrow and shallow with just enough room for her. She couldn't even bend her knees. There were gaps at the hinges of the door where she could poorly see Eriol go back towards his stool.

The front door opened and silence dominated the bar. Three soldiers entered, their presence killed the last remaining vibe in the room. Tomoyo heard boots, slowly walking into the centre of the bar and a voice boom; "As you were."

A slow gathering of hushed mummers filled the rooms. Two of the soldiers took a seat by the other end of the bar and snapped their fingers for beers, which they had no intention of paying for.

Tomoyo could see Eriol with his head down, uninterested in the soldier's presence. The third soldiers had made his way towards Eriol. Eriol didn't even glance up.

"Are you Hiirigazawa Eriol?" He asked.

Tomoyo felt the voice was familiar, but strained to hear.

"If I am?" He asked, putting cold distance between them.

"Then we should talk. There are some issues we need to discuss."

Eriol now turned his head to eye up the soldier, who's uniform was a fancier variation from the other soldiers. Eriol looked him up and down before returning to his drink.

"I only discuss matters with the South through Lieutenant Meiling Li. I don't know you."

The soldier stood calmly, not reacting to Eriol's indifferent attitude.

"Lieutenant Li has been transferred. All matters dealing between the South and West now go through me. I'm Lieutenant Colonel Li."

Tomoyo slapped a hand over her mouth to silence her gasp.

Syaoran.

Tomoyo's stomach dropped. Why was Syaoran here, in the West? Tomoyo felt a longing to see her old friend again, but not here. Never here.

"I wasn't told about this." Eriol said in annoyance.

"Apologies. It was a sudden transfer." Syaoran said smoothly.

Eriol clenched his jaw and exhaled angrily.

"What is it you need?" Eriol asked.

Syaoran glanced around the bar before answering. He took a brief second to scan every woman's face before returning to Eriol.

"Nothing. Yet." Syaoran placed his cap on the bar, he wanted the tension to ease. "I thought it would be god idea to meet, considering we will be working together from now on."

Eriol side glanced at Syaoran. His face was seemingly genuine, but Eriol was keeping his guard up.

"I do have a few questions." Syaoran said.

At that moment, the other two soldiers stood up and casually began to walk around, inspecting the face of every woman in a not so subtle manner.

"You know of the recent attack on Tomoeda asylum? Many crossed into the Western border."

"I don't know anything about it." Eriol said, opting for ignorance.

Syaoran nodded and casted his eye around. Tomoyo was watching, her heart thudding so loudly it was a wonder Syaoran couldn't hear it. She realised then what the other two soldiers were doing; they were searching for her.

Tomoyo's chest tightened. She never imagined that Syaoran would care enough to actually look for her. Guilt crashed down on her. She imagined the worry she must have been causing him. She wanted to burst out from the closet and tell him it was alright, to just go home, she was fine, stop worrying abut her…

"Maybe you don't know anything about that," Syaoran said calmly, "But perhaps you know of any new civilians who've crossed over. Anything you remember at all would be of help." At that moment, Syaoran slid over a small box towards Eriol.

Eriol furrowed his brows and opened it.

"I hear your wife is sick." Syaoran explained. "I hope this medication helps her."

Eriol pushed the box away from him.

Tomoyo held her breath. She surprised herself, she didn't want him to rat her out, even if it was Syaoran. She didn't want to leave. Not yet. Not when she was finally apart of the West.

"Like I said, I don't know of any new civilians. And as I told Meiling, I can't be bribed into lying."

Tomoyo sighed in relief and felt a warm heat rise in her chest. He was protecting her, even at the cost of Ruby's medication.

Syaoran nodded. He looked behind him at the other two soldiers. They both shook their heads. Tomoyo wasn't here.

Syaoran sighed, not that he expected to find her here, but it was worth a try.

"And what do you know of Kinomoto Touya?" He asked.

Eriol tensed inwards. He was so fucking sick of hearing about Touya.

"I don't know who that is." Eriol responded.

Eriol didn't like Syaoran. He was too calm, too at ease around him.

"Well, then. Until next time." Syaoran said and fixed his cap back on.

"You forgot something." He said picking up the box Syaoran had given him.

"It wasn't a bribe." He said and looked him dead in the eye. "I am not Meiling. I want us to get along. Consider it a peace offering."

Before Eriol could respond Syaoran had signalled the other two soldiers it was time to go. Eriol stared at the small box of medication. This was enough to get Ruby through another month. But Eriol was still sceptical of Syaoran. After at least five minutes, Tomoyo emerged from the closet, her face white with fright except for the bruise on her lip, which was deepening.

"Let's go." Eriol said and gulped back the last of his drink. "There's a dead vibe in here."

X x x

Eriol and Tomoyo walked home in silence.

Tomoyo hadn't uttered a word since they left the bar. Her mind was swimming in thoughts that troubled her. Syaoran was looking for her. She could feel the guilt eating her up. It was selfish to hide from him. But she wanted to stay.

"Was your life so bad?" Eriol asked quietly.

Tomoyo looked at him. "Why do you ask that?"

"You don't want to go back home. Why is that? Surly your life in the East is better than anything offered here." Eriol didn't speak with judgment, just curiosity.

Tomoyo looked away. She didn't know what to tell him. It's not like she could have told him the truth.

"I wasn't happy at home. I felt like a stranger…so I left. Is that hard to believe?" She asked feeling her chest tighten when she thought of the castle, the veil.

"You're happier here? Picking Mirth?" Tomoyo could tell he was growing suspicious.

"Yes." She said and stopped walking.

Eriol turned in surprise. She looked at him intensely. "And if you're gonna tell me I should leave again then-"

"I wasn't," He said matching her tone. "But I meant what I said at the time. Ruby-"

"I knew it! You're still mad about that aren't you?" Her anger erupted suddenly. She was still on edge after seeing Syaoran. She also wanted to deflect the conversation away from Tomoyo's presence in the West.

She took a brave step towards him. Her temper suddenly erupted. Eriol, as tall as he was, was only two inches taller than she. "I made a mistake. I know what the consequences could have been. I'm sorry. I only told Ruby what I did because you want her to stay locked up all day like some house cat."

That comment hit a sore spot with Eriol.

"You think you can tell me how to treat my wife?" He said closing the gap between them even further.

"You don't treat her like your wife. You and your mother treat her like a child. You don't even ask her what _she_ wants. Of course she went out and did what she did, she's gonna go god-damn insane locked up in that house! She needs freedom!" Tomoyo didn't realize she was shouting until she finished and her echo rang out and died a few seconds later.

She blinked and took a step back. Swallowing a lump in her throat she felt her words eerily resonate with her own life in the North. Being told what to do, when she could do it. She seen it in Ruby, she didn't want Ruby to live like that. Tomoyo ended up in an insane asylum because of it.

Eriol's fists were clenched. This woman infuriated him.

"How the hell would you know what she want's? What are you to her?"

"I was her friend!"

"You were the maid. One of many. You've no idea what's it's been like to watch her get worse and worse over the years!"

"And your solution is to keep her at home all the time?"

"It's for her own good!"

"Her own good, or for your peace of mind? If that's the case why don't you just strap her to her bed? Then you'll never have to worry about her health or her ever being happy!"

Eriol turned away from her. He wasn't used to displaying this much passion or emotion. He preferred to bottle it up, but she made him so angry. But with all that anger in him, it simply fizzled out. He crossed his arms and sighed.

"I do what I do to protect her." He said in a calm voice that admitted some form of defeat. "She's so sick and…there's nothing I can do to stop that. I just want to…protect her, in any way possible."

Tomoyo saw sadness cloud his eyes. She was harsh with her words. It killed her to know it but, Eriol was just trying to be a good husband. And maybe Mrs Hiirigazawa was trying to be a good mother-in-law. Maybe that's what her own parents were trying to do with her. By locking her up in the castle, she was technically safe. Their intentions may have been in the right place yet, look where she ended up because of it.

A light breeze blew through his hair. Tomoyo wanted to hold him, to tell him that he _was_ a good husband, probably _too_ good.

"I'm sure you do. But, maybe the more you try to protect her, the shitter her quality of life's gonna be." Tomoyo said honestly.

To her surprise, he nodded.

He smirked. "You know, when she woke up, one of the first things she asked about was you." He said.

Tomoyo swayed with pretend coyness. "Well why wouldn't she? I'm hard to forget."

"You really are something." He said with a small chuckle.

Tomoyo became serious. "You know, I do care about Ruby. A lot. I'd be devastated if anything happened to her... I just wanted to be her friend. I'm not stupid. I know I tend to run my mouth off about things without thinking…"

Eriol nodded and sighed. "Yeah, she think's the same of you."

He began to walk again and Tomoyo fell in suit behind him. "So…is the Madison ban on the Hiirigazawa house lifted?" She asked and risked nudging him with her elbow.

Eriol smiled shyly, something he was doing more often around her. "I guess so. For now."

Tomoyo thought of leaving the West many times during her labour on the farm. When the pain was too much or the heat was too intense or the tiredness pushed her to the edge of tears. But for Eriol's smile, for his approval…she'd have done it all over again.

Thought she couldn't stop her wicked and lustful thoughts about him, she had to prioritize her friendship with Ruby.

For now, she and Eriol would only have to be friends.

She was content with that.

X x x

The evening sun was cooling off as Sakura made her way to the train station.

The day had been a let-down. Yue had walked past her desk several times but never stopped to look or speak to her. It had only been a day since she proposed her idea of going into the West but he gave her no feedback, no update, nada.

She sighed. Her father would be home today and she had no idea of how to tell him she had switched jobs again. She was afraid of giving him a heart attack. If he had his way, she'd still be working at _Happy Books_ or somewhere within a five-mile radius of their home.

In the midst of all these thoughts Sakura didn't notice the black car pulling up beside her.

"Excuse me, miss?"

Sakura flinched and looked over at the driver who was leaning his elbow out from the window.

"Something I can do you for you Lieutenant?" Sakura asked with the corners of her mouth twitching up.

Syaoran drove at her walking pace.

"It's a bit dangerous for you to be walking by yourself at this hour, miss." Syaoran smirked.

Sakura raised an eyebrow and continued walking. "Thank you for your concern Lieutenant, but the train station is but two minutes from here. You don't think I can manage that all by myself?"

"There's a lot that can happen in two minutes miss. Perhaps you should let me drive you, just to make sure you'll be safe, otherwise I won't be able to sleep right tonight."

Sakura laughed and felt all the worry and stress from her day evaporate. She looked around her and saw that they were alone. Before she could let the dangers of them being seen together cloud her judgement, she giddily got into the car.

Sakura felt excitement as he drove off, she rarely got to be in a car.

"How did you find me?" She asked.

"Not easily, you're a hard woman to track down." He said with a wink that made her feel like a school girl.

He parked the car in front of a lake. There was no one else there, just them.

She unfastened her seatbelt and as soon as it was off her his lips found hers with hunger. With the strength of one arm he lifted her onto his lap. Her fingers weaved into his hair and his hands felt their way under her shirt and moved up her bare skin. His kissed moved from her lips to her neck Her hands fell to his chest and started to unbutton his shirt.

With each kiss and caress, the stress of their problems was temporarily muted.

X x x

"fulfilled?"

Sakura shook her head. "No, not that."

Syaoran scratched his head and thought. "Satisfied?"

"No." Sakura racked her brain but she couldn't think of the word. "It's like…everything is how it should be…like, you're just right. Like, you don't need anything else at that moment."

Syaoran blew air out of his cheeks.

"You mean…content?"

"Yes! That's it. _Content._ " She said. "I forgot that word."

Syaoran chuckled and she nudged him.

"Don't laugh. English is hard."

"I know," He said bringing her closer sweeping the fringe from her eyes. "It's just, you're so...cute."

Sakura raised an eyebrow. "When you're not being scary." He said correcting himself and kissed her until she laughed with him.

"Why were you thinking of that word?" He asked.

She smirked and shook her head. "No reason." In truth, she forgot that word because Sakura hasn't felt so content in a while. Perhaps content was too mild a word. She felt light headed, elated when she was with Syaoran. But she was too afraid to use those words, as if admitting to herself she felt so happy would only bring misfortune to her. So she settled on _content_.

They were sitting on the bonnet of his car. She sighed and leaned into his chest.

"I thought someone as important as you wouldn't have the time to be rendezvousing." She teased and looked up at him.

"All work, no play." He said and traced his finger over her cheekbone. Even in the night shade, her eyes still glowed a sparkling green.

"But," He said and sighed, lifting his arm from around her. "Speaking of work." He said and took out a brown envelope from his pocket.

Sakura took it hesitantly and opened it. She read it twice before she could understand.

"It's…" she looked at him to finish her sentence.

Syaoran nodded and took her hand. He was afraid by giving it to her, she'd interoperate it wrong.

"It's your visa, to go into the West."

Sakura stiffened. She didn't know what to say. Should she own up to her intent to go into the west? Then again, he already must know to be giving her a visa. She said nothing put the visa back into the envelope.

"Sakura," He said softly and pulled her by the waist close to him. "You need to start trusting me, like I trust you." He lied. "If you want to go to the West, I have no reason to stop you. No one does." He tipped his forehead against hers. "Just…be safe. Ok?"

Sakura looked into his amber eyes, she couldn't see dishonesty in them, or maybe she just didn't want to. She bit her tongue from asking questions. This was too good to be true. She would go into the west, she'd find out its secrets, no matter how bad.

"…Thank you." She said and kissed him.

As they got into the car Sakura was so overwhelmed she thought her head would float right off.

"Anyway," He said starting the car. "It's not like you'll be alone."

"What do you mean?"

"I'll have my men escorting you at all times. For your safety."

Sakura's face dropped. She quickly recovered a tight smile before he looked at her.

Of course there was a catch.

But, no matter.

She would be able to make it into the west.

With that much, she was content.

X x x

 **Looooong chapter!**

 **I hope you liked it. :)**

X x x

"Explain to me again, one more time. Tell me exactly, _exactly_ what you were told."

"My God, mother for the last time, that's what they told me. They didn't elaborate." Eriol said grinding his teeth in annoyance.

Eriol scanned through the documents he had to have prepared. He knew why his mother was so agitated, this _request_ came out of nowhere.

Mrs Hiirigazawa followed him into the kitchen and pestered him for more information. In the living room Tomoyo raised an eyebrow tapped Ruby on the shoulder.

"What's the big deal? It's only a reporter. Why are they so worked up about it?"

Ruby brushed her hair in the mirror with an old comb. Tomoyo noticed that Ruby was even dressed up more so than usual today. Ruby turned her head to make sure Eriol was still in the kitchen and whispered.

"The whole thing is just really strange." She said and held out her wrists to Tomoyo. Tomoyo helped her with the cuff buttons. "Like, all of a sudden a reporter is coming into the west for a _cultural expose_. It's very fishy. The rest of Tomoeda never cared for us, so why now?" Ruby turned around and Tomoyo began to plait her hair for her. They became closer with each passing day.

"So why does this reporter want to meet with Eriol?"

"He's been the go between between the West and the South for a while now. Also because he's trusted by the villagers, it probably just makes sense. And why wouldn't it?" she gushed.

Ruby turned around and beamed. "My husband is amazing."

Tomoyo nodded, ignoring the weird feeling of envy every time Ruby mentioned Eriol.

"So, what does the reporter want to talk about?"

"That's just it." Ruby replied and took out the ironing board. "We don't know. Could be about farming, the wall, our lives, Utopia day...anything. That's why Mrs Hiirigazawa is so nervous. Now, come here and I'll show you how to use this."

In the kitchen, Mrs Hiirigazawa paced.

"Mother, please. Will you just go? It'll be hard for you to pretend you're dead if they catch you here."

"Disaster!" She bellowed. "A Southern reporter coming here, our rations being taken left, right and centre, Touya and his rouge's causing mayhem wherever they go and a maid who doesn't know how to god-damn iron!" She said throwing her voice over to Tomoyo.

Tomoyo put a hand on one hip and pointed the steaming hot iron at Mrs Hiirigazawa. "Hey! I'm trying, ok?"

Ruby put her hand on Tomoyo's writst to lower the hot iron.

"Mother, leave her alone. Your frustration has nothing to do with her." Eriol snapped.

Ruby's head flinched towards him. Tomoyo, too looked at him with some shock. The same thought went though both of their head; _Why was he defending Madison?_

Tomoyo kept her head down and ironed the sheets as her cheeks burned. She didn't dare look at Ruby. She focused on the ironing, which she was poor at.

"That's it. You've got the hang of it now." Ruby said in a weak voice and a forced smile.

It wasn't Tomoyo's imagination, Eriol's comment went down strangely with Ruby too.

Before Mrs Hiirigazawa could reply, the doorbell went off. They exchanged looks with each other before Mrs Hiirigazawa disappeared into the upstairs bedroom to be hidden from sight.

"They're early." Eriol mumbled.

Ruby walked over to join her husband's side. She slid her hand into his and gave it a small squeeze. As she did this, she looked back over at Tomoyo and caught her eye.

Tomoyo turned around and began folding sheets. The awkward moment had yet to pass.

Eriol walked over to the door and opened it. The first person he saw was a soldier accompanied by another. He then looked down to meet a pair of wide, emerald green eyes staring back at him.

The girl blinked and adjusted her handbag at her side. A small notebook was clutched in her hands and a pencil poked from her breast pocket. Eriol was confused. For some reason, he had expected a male reporter oozing arrogance and superiority.

The woman was petite, a child compared to Eriol's huge, built frame. But in her delicate face there was no coyness, hesitance or timid-ness.

She took a step forward and extended her hand out.

"Kinomoto Sakura, reporter for the _Tomoedan Mirror._ Nice to meet you."

X x x


	14. Stage 3: Interrogate

**Enjoy! R &R!**

Sakura's hand hovered in the doorway.

Eriol looked from it to the small woman it belonged to.

The two accompanying soldiers stood rigid and unmoving. Sakura tried not to gulp at the huge stature of a man before her. Syaoran was much taller than her, but Eriol was almost as broad as the doorway itself. She knew he could crush her if he so chose to. His face was tense and his blue eyes radiated contempt. Sakura tried to hold her ground but felt a shudder coming on.

Eriol turned away from Sakura, not acknowledging her gesture. Sakura dropped her hand awkwardly and followed him inside. The first thing that struck her was the smell of wood and incense. It was warming.

She clutched her satchel as they emerged into the living room. His house was very homely. She didn't expect it. In fact, she didn't expect any of what she'd seen so far. First there were the guards, on Syaoran's orders. They were by her side the whole time, which only made her unsettled. Then, there was the West itself, which felt very primitive in comparison to the East. Sakura's heart tore when she met some of the children with dirtied faces and fake smiles. They must have been prepped for her visit. For their words held favour for Utopia, but their eyes shone fear.

In truth, she didn't know why she had to come to the Hiirigazawa house. She was just told he was the man with the information.

In the kitchen Sakura saw a woman dressed in a peach coloured dress. Her mousy brown hair fell over her collarbones, which protruded from her skin. She smiled a warm smile at Sakura. Sakura thought she was thin. The woman beside her was a stark contrast. She was tall, almost a stall as Eriol with cropped black hair. She had her arms crossed and looked at Sakura with reserved curiosity. She wore a mask which covered her nose and mouth. It was flu season in the West, apparently.

"I'm Ruby, it's nice to meet you." Said the frail girl and bowed.

She nudged the woman beside her, who had not budged until that moment.

"Madison," She whispered and nudged her.

Sakura thought she saw the woman named Madison roll her eyes before giving a pathetic bow. Had the situation been different, Sakura would have laughed. It reminded her of when the General came to her house.

"Please don't mind me. Just do whatever you were doing before I arrived." Sakura offered in attempt to ease the tense situation. Sakura barely finished her sentence before Madison walked off casually past the two soldiers, who didn't look too impressed with her irreverence.

"She's new." Ruby said scrambling for and excuse before excusing herself.

Sakura was left alone with Eriol and the two guards, who had settled on a couch in the corner with bored expressions. They didn't seem thrilled with having to watch over her.

"Where would you like to do the interview?" Sakura asked, trying to keep her voice strong.

Eriol inclined to the kitchen table where she sat and opened her notebook.

X x x

"Toya! Toya!"

Toya closed the lid on the crate and looked up.

He saw Kazahara, a trusted and loyal rebel, running towards him at a speed his legs struggled to keep up with.

"What is it? Stop drawing so much attention here, idiot!" Toya said.

He was slightly on edge. He couldn't risk the contents of the crate being discovered. Not yet.

"Down at the Hiirigazawa house…" He huffed. "A military van…two soldiers…and a woman in cssual clothes…from the South…a reporter I think."

Toya raised an eyebrow. "Reporter? Why is there a reporter here?"

"Don't know, but do you think…maybe…?"

Toya narrowed his eyes and smirked. "That rat bastard. He's going to turn me in, isn't he? He's going to rat me out the Military so his pathetic wife can get her drugs."

Kazahara looked to the ground. He was thinking the same. Chivalry between Toya and Eriol had deteriorated rapidly recently. The clash between them was affecting the villagers. Toya's support was on the up, Eriol's method of peaceful negotiation was proving to be the less popular route.

"We don't know that for sure Touya. But it's a bit suspicious. I've never seen that girl before. Perhaps she's here to take statements?"

Toya ran a hand through his dark brown hair and looked up at the rumbling grey clouds. This news wasn't too terrible. In fact, he could put his new toys to practice. He grabbed the back of Kazahara's neck and reeled him in inches from his face.

"Tell me, Karahara, how do you kill a rat?"

Kazahara knitted his brows together.

"Poison, sir?"

Toya smirked evilly and placed his boot on the lid of the crate. With an effortless push the lid slid off and its contents caused Kazahara's eyes to pop. Kazahara had never seen so many guns. He thought Toya was a crazy God-send to the West.

"No, Kazahara, you put a bullet in its head."

Kazahara's wicked smile matched Toya's.

"And what about the woman?"

"Well now," He said taking a gun into his hand and loading it. "We can't have loose tongues wagging."

X x x

"Do you mind if I ask you some personal questions?" She asked.

She saw Eriol's body stiffen with the question. Sakura gulped. He was certainly intimidating. This was not the start she imagined. She broke out a pen and paper and took a deep breath. It was amazing how good it felt again to write. She missed it.

"How long have you lived in the West?" She asked.

"I don't have time for these questions. I'm sure the military has all my personal information."

Sakura flinched at the strength of his voice, it would have been enough to life her from her chair.

"What is your relationship with the South?" She asked, trying to get a question he was willing to answer.

"Again, they know all of this. They don't need to send a reporter from the South to know this. What is it you're here for?" He asked narrowing his eyes.

Sakura suddenly felt…silly. Why was she here? She knew she had to cover a story about the trade but…she couldn't let such an opportunity slip by.

Sakura scribbled a few lines in her notebook.

 _Appreciation for the South…._

She decided it was best to write the opposite of what she observed in case the soldiers confiscated her notes. It was obvious he held some contempt for the South. She asked questions about statistics and percentages. They were mundane and boring to ask. She scribbled down the figures, knowing she'd have to skew then a bit if they were to make it into the paper.

It was useless to do any of this, not while the soldiers were sniffing about. Sakura asked boring and predictable questions to which Eriol seemed to get more irritated. But he was not the only one. Sakura peaked behind her and saw the soldiers were getting anxious with boredom. She could tell they craved a cigarette.

Ruby came in with a tray of ice tea. She smiled meekly at Sakura, perhaps an apology for her husband's behaviour. Then, out of nowhere, she burst into a fit of coughing. Eriol's face broke into concern as he jumped up and went to her. The fit seemed to go on awkwardly long. Sakura became alarmed as blood coughed up into Ruby's hand. That was not normal.

"Go upstairs and rest." Eriol whispered and began to steer her away.

"Wait!" Sakura said shooting up.

They both looked at her in surprise.

"Um…can you…answer some questions for me?"

Eriol's face turned to thunder at such a ridiculous question.

"Just a few, it's important."

Ruby sat down beside her despite Eriol's protest. On closer inspection Sakura saw that this girl was frightfully sick.

Sakura asked some questions about their marriage and life within the West. They were aimless questions that went nowhere. Then, finally one of the soldiers cracked and pulled out a cigarette and began to light it.

"Excuse me, Lieutenant. I hardly think that's appropriate giving this woman's condition." She said shooting a pretend look of horror.

The soldier awkwardly looked from Sakura to Ruby's this face. He was going to tell her to get lost, but decided to cave in.

"I'm sure it's ok to smoke outside, isn't it?" Sakura asked Eriol.

Eriol began to grow suspicious of Sakura. When she looked at him dead on she reminded him of someone. But Eriol could not figure out who.

After a moment he nodded and the two soldiers disappeared out into the back garden, where Sakura hoped they would take their time.

"I'm very sorry for making you stay." Sakura said. "I wanted to make them leave."

Eriol raised an eyebrow. There was something suspicious about this girl.

Ruby excused herself upstairs and Sakura sat alone with Eriol, finally.

Eriol's face was full of concern, Sakura knew he simply did not want to be here.

"How long has she been sick?" Sakura asked.

Eriol glared at her. He hated fake sympathy. What would a southerner care about Ruby's condition?

"For as long as I've known her." He said briefly.

"What do the doctors say? What is it she has?"

Eriol scoffed with w a smirk and said no more. He was a closed book. Sakura needed him to know whose side she was truly on.

"Mr Hiirigazawa, can you quote me some statistics on rations?"

Eriol sighed with such a mundane question he'd have to lie about. "Everything is divided equally. All basic food rations are distributed equally."

"Strange." Sakura said. "There are seventy million people in Tomoeda, most of which live in the West. Explain to me how that's fair?"

Eriol narrowed his eyes at the word 'fair'. Nothing was fair in Tomoeda. He clenched his jaw.

"I've noticed very few motor vehicles here too." She continued when he didn't answer. "That must make working here difficult. Also, there seems to be a lack of proper roads, must make transporting all that Mirth difficult."

"I know what you're doing." He said lowly. "You're testing my loyalty. Nice try, I'm no fool. You can tell the Southerners that too when you go back." Sakura noticed his Western accent. The vowels were elongated and he attacked his words with sharp 't's and 'd's.

"First of all, I am from the East, don't lump me in with those Southern gun-happy brutes. Secondly, I am no fool either. I've done some research Mr. Hiirigazawa, and the math doesn't add up. If what your saying is true, then half of the West in on the brink of starvation and poverty."

Eriol flinched. _Southern Brutes._ Eriol began to wonder whose side she was on.

"What do you want from me?" He asked slowly. "Who sent you? Was it that Lieutenant Colonel?"

Sakura tried not to react to the mention of Syaoran. She put a mental pin in that. He watched her lay her palm flat on the table and stare at him with her green orbs of defiance. That look was so familiar, Eriol racked his mind to recognize it.

"Answers."

"Whatever it is your trying to do…I don't want any part of it."

"You and too many other people. That's why we live in the society we have."

Eriol looked past her and saw the guards were still on the patio smoking and having a sneer about something. Eriol felt caught. She wasn't from the South…did that make her more trustworthy? She also wanted the soldiers to leave, did that mean she didn't trust them…?

"We don't have much time." She said urgently.

"What do you want to know?"

"What percentage of food rations are kept for the West?"

Eriol was frozen in indecision. It only took one wrong comment for the Military to justify sweeping in and arresting you.

Sakura saw his hesitance. "Ok, you don't need to say anything. Just let me know if I'm close. 30%?"

Eriol regarded her before shaking his head.

"25% 20%?"

Eriol shook his head again and gestured lower while keeping his eyes on the two guards.

"15%"

Eriol gave the briefest of nods which sent Sakura scribbling furiously.

"How come your wife hasn't been to the doctors?"

Eriol tensed. He didn't like the accusation in her voice, but he began to think that's just how she normally spoke.

"There are no hospitals. Only a couple of doctors who comes to the West every two months. We've trained ourselves to deal with the sick but Ruby…we don't know."

Sakura scribbled down her notes.

"What about her medication."

"Running out. I don't know when it'll come back."

Sakura heard the sadness and defeat in his voice.

"Have you written to the council? Why not apply for a special visa into the North-" Sakura broke off. She was getting ahead of herself. She could see that Eriol was not comfortable with this.

She jotted down a few more things. Why the hell were there such and absence of doctors in the West? They were so abundant in the East. She couldn't imagine her own mother receiving no medical treatment when she was ill. Though Sakura was too young to even remember her illness, her father said it took her suddenly, but the doctors did all they could.

She began to realize that Eriol was not just a man who begrudged the Southerners. He was in pain. He was watching Ruby slowly die and there was nothing he could do about it. Sakura wondered how much of this Syaoran already knew. Did he realize this was happening. A painful thought crossed her mind. What if he knew…but like the other soldiers…he didn't care. Sakura put those thoughts away for now, she couldn't let Syaoran distract her.

"Why have you come here now? Why have you only now come to display some sort of concern? Because of Utopia day?" Eriol asked crossing his arms and looking at her dead on. No one ever expressed interest in how Westerners lived before. So, why now?

"I couldn't write for many years. Now I can. That's it."

"Why's that?"

"My father…he is a disgraced journalist. It crippled me for a while. You may have heard of him. Kinomoto Fujitaka."

Eriol lips parted at the mention of Fujitaka's name.

"You're…you're the daughter of Kinomoto Fujitaka?"

Sakura nodded and noticed the change in his manner. Eriol now recognized that face, the glare the strange aura of defiance around her. It was the same look Toya had. She was Toya's sister…

The sound of guards returning brought him from his thoughts.

Sakura scribbled something down on her notebook, tore it out, folded it and slid it across to him. He picked it up to read it but stuffed it into his trouser pocket before the guards came back.

"Times up." One of them said in a disgruntled tone. "We need you to sign some things." He said nodding to Eriol.

Sakura stood up and went to the back garden to wait for them. Before she left she glanced back at Eriol, who was looking at her with indecision.

Tomoyo was hanging up the washing in the back garden and didn't see Sakura coming up behind her.

"Excuse me. Madison, isn't it?"

Tomoyo slowly turned around looked Sakura up and down before turning her back to her once more.

"What of it?" Tomoyo said, throwing another sheet onto the line.

This girl had attitude, thought Sakura. She found it odd, everyone here reacted to Sakura in either fear or distain. But this girl had an aura of superiority.

"Can I ask you some questions?"

"My, my, curious little reporter aren't you." Tomoyo replied and raised an eyebrow. She was not intimidated by Sakura, for she was only a small little thing. Tomoyo had crushed past maids twice, three her size with a few words of her sharp tongue. "What could a little ol' maid like me possibly help you with?"

Sakura didn't like her. But something intrigued her.

"How long have you lived in the west?"

Tomoyo brushed a strand of hair from her eyes and replied. "Born and raised here. Is that all you wanted to ask?"

"That's funny." Sakura said taking a few small steps forward. "Your accent tells a different story."

Tomoyo momentarily froze, Sakura took her off guard. She composed herself quickly and shrugged with a smirk.

"You've got me. I transferred from the East a long time ago." Tomoyo turned her back to Sakura again. She didn't like where the reporter was going.

"Really? What section of the East did you live in?"

Tomoyo stuttered, she felt cornered. "Oh…you wouldn't know it. The East is so big and all…"

"I've lived there my whole life. Try me." Sakura dared and folded her arms.

Tomoyo's hands froze over the laundry basket as she scrambled to think of another lie.

"What was your full name again?" Sakura asked and tilted her head to the side. "Or have you forgotten that too?"

Tomoyo clenched her jaw.

 _Why that little…_

Tomoyo stalled a little too late. What started for Sakura as curiosity rapidly grew into full blown suspicion.

Sakura opened her mouth but was interrupted by the startling sound of a bang that came from the forest. Birds fled the treetops as the shots echo faded.

Sakura jumped back. Was that a …gunshot? She thought.

The two soldiers burst through the back doors.

"Stay there!" One roared at Sakura as they bolted past them.

Seconds later Eriol emerged. Tomoyo stared in shock at where the sound came from.

"Are you ok?" He asked, grabbing Tomoyo's arm and turning her to face him. The contact both shocked and comforted her. He was quite close to her, looking concerned.

"I'm fine." She said after a second, her heart beating either from shock or from his touch. "But, what was that?"

"Sounded like a bullet." Eriol mused.

 _He's still touching me._ Tomoyo thought mentally.

"I'll see what it is." He said and left the two of them.

Sakura and Tomoyo watched as Eriol disappeared into the thick forest, his footsteps faded out.

"Does your husband know what he's doing?" Sakura asked wide-eyed. "He's not armed."

Tomoyo's breath caught. "He's not my husband." She breathed.

"Oh, sorry. I just assumed."

Tomoyo thought of Ruby and turned to see if she was ok. To Tomoyo's surprise, Ruby was already standing there on the porch, looking at Tomoyo. Tomoyo's heart stopped momentarily. Did Ruby see that? Was she watching the whole time? If she was, it was innocent, right? He only touched her arm, it was out of concern. Righy?

"Ruby!" She said running up to her. "Ruby, let's go inside, they think it was a gunshot. It's not safe-"

"Where is my husband?" She said, cutting across her.

Tomoyo knew she saw. And she wasn't impressed. The way she said _my_ husband…Tomoyo felt guilt rise within her despite the fact she did nothing.

"He followed the guards into the forest-"

Again, Ruby cut her off by walking past her. Eriol emerged out of the woods with the soldiers.

"Eriol!" Ruby said and rushed to his side and in a manner Tomoyo found dramatic, threw her arms around him. "I was so worried, what's happening?" Tomoyo raised an eyebrow, Ruby wasn't one to act so helpless. She was usually reserved.

He kept her close and kissed the top of her head. "It must have been something else. Nobody is in the forest."

"We're leaving." The guard barked and gave Sakura a rough shove towards the door.

As Sakura was escorted back into the military van, she looked back at Eriol and tapped her pocket.

Suddenly remembering Sakura's note, he took out the note and unfolded it.

 _'_ _We're on the same side.'_

X x x

 ** _Earlier that day_**

Touya, Kazahara and a few others crept through the forest that led to the back of the Hiirigazawa house.

The men were ecstatic about their weapons and shared Touya's lust to try them out. Toya himself was giddy with anticipation. Without Eriol in the picture, Toya could resume his own agenda without competition. Even that old bat Mrs Hiirigazawa wouldn't be able to stop him.

The Hiirigazawa house came into view.

Damn, he thought, he forgot about Madison. She was hanging laundry in the garden. He knew she wasn't a fan of Toya. If she seen him, she'd surly rat him out. He could just take her out too, but he had nothing against her, not yet.

"Change of plan." Toya whispered to the others, who were lurching low. "Take them out from here."

The back door opened and Toya could make out the body of a small woman. Toya edged closer to get a better look. Her face was covered by a fluttering sheet of laundry. He signalled the other to come closer. Madison spoke to the woman, though Toya couldn't hear any of it. The sheet floated higher in the wind. He saw only the back of the woman's head. Toya loaded his gun. He would take her out first. He had a good aim, he's been practicing non-stop recently.

The girls light brown hair whipped in the wind. He brought the nose of the gun in her direction.

He stalled when she took a few steps towards Madison and said something. The wind made a sharp alter in its direction and lifted the girl's hair from her face.

Toya stalled, though he didn't know why.

Her face, it was…no, it couldn't be.

"Toya, let me take her out. I can do it." Kazahara said eagerly when he saw Toya hesitate. He moved in front of Toya and aimed at the girl.

Toya was frozen onto the spot.

Her face…her hair…

As if the girl could hear his confusion, her face turned towards he forest and Toya felt the colour drain from his face.

"Yes, perfect. I got her Toya. Watch this." Kazahara said with giddiness.

Toya looked from Kazahara to the girl to the gun.

"No!" Toya said and threw himself over Kazahara.

The impact caused the gun to go off into the air.

Madison and the girl whipped their heads in their direction.

"Toya what the hell? Why did you do that-"

"Fall back!" Toya hissed lowly to them with urgency.

"But Toya-"

"I said fall back!" He hissed and Kazahara left with shock on his face. Toya looked back one more time and felt a lump bobbing in his throat.

He knew those eyes. No matter how much time has went by, he could never forget. For those eyes use to look to him for answers before he ran away a long time ago…

Her face had matured since he saw her last, she was not a girl anymore.

"Sakura…" He breathed.

He hasn't said her name in such a long time. It was so strange and elating to do so.

But Toya could not enjoy the moment for too long. Two soldiers and Eriol burst from the back door and headed for the forest. As much as it killed him Toya fled from his sister with a thousand questions burning in the back of his mind…

X x x

Tomoyo put the last of the dishes away.

She was keeping to herself since the incident earlier. A soldier came by later to take a statement but it seems it was just a strange incident that required no further investigation. Tomoyo was on edge. Not because of the gunshot but because of the reporter, Kinomoto.

Perhaps Tomoyo should have been grateful he gunshot interrupted Sakura's interrogation. Tomoyo saw no viciousness in the reporter, but she knew she was cunning and Tomoyo had made a major slip up in assuming that Sakura was from the South.

Tomoyo knew she'd have to get better with her lies.

As Tomoyo wiped down the table she saw Ruby emerge from the living room in her nightgown.

Things were still quite awkward but neither of them would mention earlier events. Tomoyo bit the inside of her cheek and tossed her bag across her shoulder.

"I'm going to the market tomorrow morning; do you need me to bring you anything?" Tomoyo offered.

Ruby had her back to Tomoyo. In the candlelight Ruby saw that she was counting up her pills. There wasn't too many left.

"No thanks." She said without turning around.

Tomoyo shuffled with awkwardness. She wanted to shake Ruby and tell her not to be so damn suspicious about her husband. What had happened earlier was nothing. Eriol was just showing concern.

But Tomoyo bit her tongue and said nothing.

"Ok, goodnight." Tomoyo said and Ruby just nodded.

She was angry with Tomoyo. Tomoyo was also angry, because it was not her fault. It was her husband who touched her. He was the one showing concern.

Tomoyo wanted to just get out of that house and forget about the day. Maybe it would do her good not to be around Eriol or Ruby for a while. Her shift in the fields started tomorrow morning, it would keep her occupied.

As she walked through the living room she was surprised to see Eriol sitting at the study, pages littered the desk he was working on.

Tomoyo should have just mumbled a 'goodnight' and left him there. But she couldn't ignore the look of frustration and helplessness on his face. Upon hearing her enter the room, he looked up Tomoyo thought he would look away from her and go back to what he was doing. Instead, he offered a weak smile.

Tomoyo thought he looked so tired. He was rarely in the house anymore. He was always off doing something for someone else. And when he was at home he had to look out for Ruby, who's condition didn't seem to be letting up despite her medication.

"You're leaving." He said more as a statement than a question.

Tomoyo nodded and adjusted her coat over her shoulders. Autumn was bringing in chilly nights.

Eriol nodded and looked back to the papers in front of him.

 _Just leave him be_. Tomoyo thought. _Whatever it is, it's not your business._

Tomoyo began to walk away, but paused beside him.

"What are you doing?" She whispered.

Eriol rubbed his tired eyes and tapped his pen against the page. "Nothing that will achieve anything." He said in a defeatist voice.

Against her better judgment Tomoyo glanced down at the page and raised her eyebrows.

" _Clow Reed Enterprises,_ isn't that the name of the Northern Steelwork Company? Why are you writing to them?"

Eriol looked up at her with surprise. "How do you know about them?" He asked.

Tomoyo locked her jaw. _Idiot,_ she thought. Her loose tongue was determined to fuck her over.

"…It's really well known in the East." She lied. She took a seat beside him.

"I know they're just a steel company." Eriol said. "But I hear they've done charitable work in the past. Five years ago, they donated a million dollars' worth of medicine to the West, I was hoping if I wrote to them personally…"

"Then they'd supply Ruby with enough medication." Tomoyo said and nodded. She felt her admiration for Eriol continue to soar. The lengths he went through for his wife, it made her sick with envy, but also thankful that Ruby had such a person in her life.

"Or at least give us another damn hospital, with full time staff." Eriol sighed. "This isn't the first letter I've written to them. Either they're not reading them, or they simply don't' care. I have to try either way."

Tomoyo nodded and fought the urge to place her hand on his. She was elated he was opening up to her though. She wished she could do something to melt away his frustration. Maybe there was something she could do…

"Do you mind?" Tomoyo asked nodding towards his letter.

Surprised, Eriol handed it to her. Tomoyo read it and when she came to the end, she laughed.

"This," She said and waved the letter in front of him. "This would never in a million years make it past administration."

Eriol furrowed his brows together. "And why not?"

Tomoyo could name a hundred reasons why they wouldn't. After all, no one was more familiar with _Clow Reed Enterprise_ than she was. When she lived in the palace, every year without fail she was dragged to their annual ball where she had to hear in depth about the company.

In short, they were snobs. But they loved nothing more than to stroke their own ego. Though it was a company, the key board members loved nothing more than to be loved.

"Give me that pen." She said.

Eriol didn't question her.

"There is nothing they love more than to be seen to be charitable. You can't just ask, you have to offer them something in return."

"What could we possibly offer, we have nothing."

"You have your admiration and thankfulness, which is all they want. Let them mention their charity to you in a few papers, it won't be a problem. Also, we're going to address the current board member, Yoshiyuki Terada. He loves nothing more than to be recognized. Also, we're going to have to re-phrase your entire letter. They won't read anything that isn't in Northern English."

"I can't speak or write Northern English."

"Well then," Tomoyo said flashing a winning smirk. "Aren't you lucky you have me."

"But how would you know how to write Northern English?"

"I've dabbled." Tomoyo said and offered no other explanation. All those years of Northern English writing her mother made her do were finally paying off. "So, what is it you want from them?"

"Medication, maybe a hospital."

"Too little, they won't bother with that. We'll say three hospitals and a pharmacy in every village. And as a thank you to them, we'll name a hospital after him personally."

Eriol watched as Tomoyo wrote with ease. Her face glowed in the candlelight and Eriol tried to identify the feelings coursing through him. Tomoyo kept amazing him. Her strength and knowledge seemed to have no end. She was the every-woman. She rose at five a.m. to work on the fields, helped to take care of his wife and now…helping him. She was so…different to Ruby, stronger and more…

Eriol blinked hard. No, he should never compare any woman to his wife. Ruby was in a different situation. That was unfair. He was ashamed his thoughts even went there.

Her icy blue eyes scanned the letter she had just written. She placed a white finger to her lips and mouthed the words to herself. Eriol found himself fixated on her mouth, her nose, her cheeks…

"There." She said with a satisfied smile. "This should do something. Read it yourself."

Eriol slid in closer to her and read the letter. Tomoyo tried to act normal as his shoulder brushed of hers. He took the letter into his hands and read it. She could feel the heat radiating of her skin. She inhaled his manly musky scent and imagined how deliciously hot she would feel if those rough hands were all over her body. The muscles in her groin tensed and she felt a flush threaten to rise to her cheeks. She looked away and tried to dismiss such shameful thoughts.

"I don't understand any of it." Eriol murmured. "It's like it's not even English."

"It's the only language they'll take into consideration." She whispered back. "Trust me."

Eriol wanted to question her further. How could a common Easterner come to be so knowledgeable about Northern English? He didn't want to question it, she was doing him a huge favour.

Eriol smiled. For the first time in a long, long time, he felt a ray of hope. He looked at Tomoyo, whose face was very close to his. "Thank you."

Tomoyo blushed but didn't look away. She never imagined such a simple little thing could possibly make him so happy.

Her heart was beating so fast now. She was sure he could hear it. They were so close now, arms touching. So why was he not putting distance between them?

"Anything I can do to help you." Tomoyo breathed.

She didn't know at what point they were whispering. It felt like they were being secretive, sly, even.

Tomoyo, thought, or wished rather, that he was going to kiss her. His eyes flickered down, doubt passed over his face.

"Madison…I-"

"Eriol."

Tomoyo and Eriol's snapped their heads towards the living room door. Ruby stood watching with a blank stare. In her hand she held a candle which provided a dim light. Tomoyo was glad it didn't cast over the probable look of disapproval on Ruby's face.

Tomoyo shot up, an action that screamed guilt.

"Ruby," Eriol said and stood up slower with a calmer demeanour. His eyes gave away a trace of guilt. "I thought you went to bed."

Ruby's eyes were only on Tomoyo. They moved to Eriol. "I was waiting for you." She said in a monotone voice.

Eriol just nodded. "I'll be right there." He said with a small smile.

Ruby did not move. She stood with her eyes fixed on Tomoyo.

Tomoyo took this as a sign.

"Goodnight." She said and gathered her things before leaving. She did not dare to look back at Eriol.

When the door shut behind her Eriol turned his attention to Ruby. "Ruby, you should get some rest."

"So should you. Come." She said and held out a frail hand, signalling him to follow.

Eriol took it, it felt so dainty in his.

As they crawled into bed Eriol kissed her on the cheek and murmured; "I love you."

Ruby nodded and placed a hand over his chest, possessively. He wasn't sure why he said that. He did love his wife, but a part of him wondered if he said that more for himself.

Tomoyo's face flashed in his mind. He shook his head. No. He loved his wife. He couldn't cause her to be suspicious over nothing. She had enough to deal with.

He did nothing wrong, he told himself.

It was all for Ruby.

It had nothing to do with Madison.

No, he was a good husband… he would never betray that…

X x x

Toya was jumpy.

He paced back and forwards and looked around to make sure he was alone.

He didn't like to be in the South, it was always a risk. But he needed answers.

Finally, a car slowly rolled up the hills with dimmed headlights. The engine was killed and the door opened. Toya saw his silver hair first.

Yue closed the door too and looked around, he was also aware of how dangerous it was to meet him here. But the excitement he felt since Toya's call pushed him to go no matter what the consequences.

"Toya." He breathed and gulped back a lump in his throat.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Toya said with an icy harsh voice which stopped Yue in his tracks a few feet away from him.

Yue's smile evaporated. Of course, Toya always put the mission before his emotions. It was silly of Yue to think otherwise.

"I tried." Yue said. "But Mrs Hiirigazawa was ignoring my calls. I couldn't reach you any other way."

Toya narrowed his eyes, he wasn't happy. "She was there as a reporter apparently, for the Tomoedan Mirror. Why would you, of all people, send her there, into the West?" Toya's voice was low but angry. "It's no place for her-"

"I tried, Toya. I really did." Yue took a step forward, he wanted to see Toya's face, the fire in his eyes. "But, she was insistent. Dangerously so."

Toya's jaw clenched. "The West is not a place for her. Don't send her there again-"

"She'll find a way, Toya. Whether it's through me or someone else. She's…stubborn, just like you." He whispered and touched Toya's face.

With the contact Toya's face untensed. His eyes remained stony.

"It's not safe to bring her into this…" He said, thinking of her young face. Then again, Sakura was not a child anymore. She was twenty-two. She had her citizenship test done, his baby sister had grown up, and he missed it.

"I know, but she brought herself into it. You can't tell me you weren't happy to see her, Toya. It's been years. She deserves to know you're alive." Yue's voice was soft. He took another step towards Toya and leaned into him. "She can help us. She's not just some kid, Toya. She's looking for answers. She's still on the fence. Wouldn't you rather her be on our side than theirs?"

Toya relaxed at Yue's touch. Finally, he brought his eyes to Yue's and felt warmness and familiarity in their greyness. Of course, Toya trusted Yue more than anyone. Everything decision he made was clever and calculated.

Toya smiled, something which elated Yue.

"You're right." He nodded. "I just…didn't want her involved."

"She's already involved." Yue said softly. "Don't underestimate her. She's determined."

Yue didn't reveal his thoughts on Sakura and the Colonel Lieutenant. Toya reacted to different news in different ways. Unless Yue had concrete proof Sakura was having an affair with the soldier, he would say nothing. But he worried the more Sakura was on the outside, the easier it would be for the Colonel Lieutenant to corrupt her.

Toya caressed Yue's face with his hand and pressed his forehead against his. "You do too much for me."

Yue smiled and looked into his eyes. No, Yue felt he didn't do enough. For it was Toya who had saved a long time ago. For that, Yue would never be able to repay him. Toya brought his lips onto Yue's and for a moment Yue was reminded why he put his life on the line for Toya every day.

"I've missed you so much." Yue said, revealing his weakness. He wished he was as strong as Toya. "I just wish I could join you over there, be by your side."

"I know." Toya said and embraced him close. "But we need you where you are. Your too important to lose."

Yue nodded and sighed. Of course, Toya was right, he was always right.

These were the sweet moments where Yue, for once, didn't have to be his usual self. He leaned against Toya's chest and returned more kisses and savoured the moment.

Because they didn't know if it would be their last.

X x x

 **I'm trying to write shorter chapters so I can upload quicker in between!**

 **Hope you enjoyed!**

 **R &R! **

X x x

Eriol woke up at some point in the night.

He turned his head to check the time. The space beside him was empty. Ruby was gone.

He went to call her name but the door clicked open. A pale hand hooked around the door and pushed it open slowly.

"Ruby?" He called.

From the darkness in the doorway, Madison stepped out. Eriol looked confused and blinked twice to see if she were real.

She brought a slender finger to her full lip and signalled for him to be quiet. He obeyed.

She was wearing Ruby's light blue silk nightgown, her hair hung softly on around her collarbones. Her finger fluttered from her lips to the opening of the nightgown where part of her cleavage was revealing.

Eriol lay in shock but was unable to say a word.

She slithered seductively to the foot of his bed. He couldn't move. She brought a white hand to the duvet and lifted it over her head. She disappeared under it and emerged on top of him, her dressing gown missing.

"Madison…" He breathed.

She brought her lips closely to his ear and whispered; "While the wife's away, the maid will play."

Before he could utter a words of defiance, her hand slid under his shorts and stoke his hard shaft. He groaned, unable to escape from under her. Her lips silenced his moans of pleasure and her tongue pushed into his.

Finally, his arms could move.

But they didn't push her away from him, instead, they ran up her bare back and breasts.

Hungry for more.

Eriol awoke with frantic and panicked breaths.

He looked beside him. Ruby was sleeping soundly. The medication had knocked her out completely.

 _It was a dream,_ he thought to himself, _only a dream._

He buried his face into his hands and shook the dream from his mind.

He looked down. He was hard. He was ashamed of himself. He looked over again at his sleeping wife and felt his stomach turn in guilt. It was only a dream he kept telling himself. It meant nothing. Madison meant nothing.

As he lay down again he breathed deeply and focused on something, anything else. But before sleep took him again, his last image was of Madison and her hands, and her eyes, and her lips…

X x x


	15. Western Wonders

Sakura's eyes fluttered open.

She slept well, something she hasn't been doing too much of lately. She didn't look at her alarm clock but she already knew it was sometime past eight.

The sunlight was struggled more to past through her curtains each day as summer began to fade and welcome autumn.

Her body began to sink into sleep again. No work today. She wondered if Syaoran was working today. She sighed and felt the empty space beside her and thought how nice it would be to find him there.

She caressed the blanket and rolled over.

Then, her eyes bolted open. She jumped out of bed, almost knocking over her dresser cabinet. She tore the door open and ran down the hallway, struggling not to fall down the stairs. Out of all days, how could she possibly have forgotten how important today was?

Her hands dove into the mail box. Nothing.

Her heart was racing.

 _It was supposed to be today, right?_ She asked herself. She checked the time. The mail usually arrived by now. She clawed at her hair. Had she gotten the day wrong?

"Sakura?"

Sakura turned around and saw her father standing in the doorway. In his hand, he held the paper.

Sakura gulped. "Is that it?" She asked.

He nodded with a small smile. Fujitaka's eyes, just like hers, held worry and fear.

"Have you read it yet?" She asked.

He shook his head. "Was waiting for you to read it first."

Sakura stood up and followed him into the kitchen where he had made her ginger tea and toast. He had not taken the news of Sakura going into the West well. Sakura remembered as he sat in him office chair, glasses threatening to slip from his nose as he tried to process his daughter's information, which seemed to keep changing.

They had come to some sort of truce. Sakura would continue to do what she did, and Fujitaka would just accept it. Not much of a compromise.

Sakura rubbed the sleep out of her eyes and began to read. She shuddered in her pyjamas as her eyes read over the article.

 _'_ _Western Wonders' by Kinomoto Sakura._

Sakura cringed at the title. That was not her decision, but she had no choice in certain decisions made by the _'Tomoedan Mirror'._

She read it, twice. When she finished she put the paper down.

"Well?" Fujitaka asked as he rubbed his hands with anxiety.

Sakura handed him the paper for him to read himself. Sakura wasn't sure what to think. She saved judgement for when Fujitaka finished. After all, he was a journalist himself at one point. She wanted to know what he thought.

When he finished reading, his reaction mimicked hers.

"Well?" She asked with anticipation. She wanted his approval. Of all people, she didn't want to fail him.

Fujitaka's face was neutral for a second too long before it softened and he nodded.

"I think…it's fantastic." He said with a wide smile that made Sakura almost collapse in relief. "I'm so proud of you." He said touching her hand and squeezing it. "My daughter," He laughed. "a published journalist in the _Tomoedan Mirror_ of all places. Takes me back to my days." He said and poured himself some tea.

To see Fujitaka to happy, it made Sakura elated. However, there were thoughts niggling at the back of her mind.

No, she thought. _You were so much more than what I am_. Sakura's smile faded. She couldn't compare herself to Fujitaka, who, in his time, inspired the minds and hearts of every civilian in the East, who was highly respected and admired everywhere he went, until suddenly, he wasn't anymore. Sakura looked down at her article. It only occupied a sixth of one page. Easily glanced over. Filler content. She began to feel a little unworthy.

"Hey, what's wrong?" He said and patted her head. "Aren't you proud?"

The more Sakura looked at the article, the quicker her high seemed to evaporate from her.

"It's just…they only used a quarter of what I wrote." She said.

The article didn't include anything about the lack of medical treatment in the West, the poor state of the roads or that workers in the mines and fields can be as young as twelve when they start. No, they just took out the good parts.

"Oh, honey. That's what happens in these things. Don't dwell on it." He said, trying to cheer her up.

She nodded. "I'm going to get dressed." She said with a weak smile that worried Fujitaka.

Ever since she told him about going into the West, he's been plagued with worry. Would she be attacked? Would she rebel? Would she run into _her?_

Or worse, _him?_

He had let he go. Not that he had much choice, Sakura was a grown woman now. But he had hoped this would be the end of it. That her curiosity beyond the walls would be satisfied and she would cease her obsession with following her parent's footsteps.

He feared it didn't.

"Sakura-" Fujitaka was cut off by the phone ringing, which startled both of them. No one ever called the house. No one ever called, ever.

Sakura and Fujitaka looked at each other.

Fujitaka took it off the receiver and brought it to his ear.

"Kinomoto residence." He said, which confused Sakura.

Fujitaka listened and raised his eyebrow before asking, "Yes, she it. May I ask who is calling?"

After a pause he nodded and looked to Sakura.

"It's you er…boss I think? A Mr. Yue?"

Sakura leaped over to him and hungrily received the phone.

"Good Morning, Sir-"

"Did you read it?" He asked bluntly.

"Yes sir."

"And?"

Sakura stalled. "I'm sorry, sir, are you asking me for my opinion?" She asked. Yue never wanted an opinion. He just wanted you to do what you were told.

"Yes. That is what I'm implying." He answered sarcastically, something Sakura wasn't used to hearing from him. She could hear shuffling and noise in the background. It must be a busy day at the office.

"Um…I think they left a lot of content out." She said, risking honestly.

"Yeah. It's called 'editing', sweetheart. It happens. So, when can you go back?"

Sakura blinked twice. Did she hear him right? "Um…go back?"

"Yes. Go back, as in, into the West? Can you go Monday?"

Sakura's jaw dropped. "Um, yes, sir I definitely can but…but why?"

"Look, I'm up to my eyes in work now I don't have time to delay. Your article was a big hit. It's the first insight they've ever gotten into Western life. Big bosses want to know if you can do a monthly supplement about it."

"A-about what? I thought I just went in there to cover trade."

"Fuck, Sakura I don't care." He said in a tired and frustrated voice. "Find out how they make their furniture, cake recipes, fashion I don't give a shit. I just need a page of content every month."

Sakura struggled to reel all this in.

"But…who would read that?"

"Do you know how many bored housewives and upper class live in the South and North? Too many. I don't know how, but you've tapped into a niche I didn't even know we needed. Rich people want to read about poor people to feel good about themselves. It's not rocket science. Is that a good enough reason for you?"

"So, I can go in and out of the West? When I want?"

"Yes. Within reason. Can you do it or not? If you say no, I'll just give it to someone else-"

"No! I'll do it." She said trying to subdue her giddiness. "But I have some conditions."

"Such as?"

"' _Western Wonders'?_ " She said with distain.

She thought she heard Yue snicker. "Yeah, cringy right? That's why I chose it."

X x x

Eriol wasn't sure how long he was watching.

He tried to stop, but his eyes kept floating up, towards her.

The weather was changing, something that the field laborers welcomed. Eriol tore his gaze away towards the long stretch of fields. He was already beginning to worry about what winter will do to the Mirth.

He rubbed his thumbs against the leather book. Its contents were filled with nothing but numbers, names and more numbers.

His gaze fell on her again.

He watched as Tomoyo wiped the sweat of her brow and pulled at a stalk of Mirth. She was in the distance but he knew the determination was in her eye. Things had changed. Whenever she was around, he felt diminished in her presence.

No, diminished was not the right word. More like, in awe of her. She had become like a celebrity in the main village. She worked hard in the fields during the day, took care of Ruby in the evening, and always made an appearance at the local bar, where her wit was always welcomed.

Perhaps it was because Eriol only knew Western life that over the years his face forgot how to smile, how to laugh…but she was infectious, no matter how hard he tried to fight her off.

His wife adored her. She made Ruby so happy that she didn't even notice he was working later, more absent than ever. In fact, she adored Madison so much, she invited her to live with them. Something that unsettled Eriol a lot. She humbly declined but eventually gave into staying on nights where she worked late. To know she was sleeping in the same house as him…it was strange.

Eriol felt his chest tighten.

There were things he didn't want to admit to himself. Like how he felt nervous when Tomoyo was in the house, or how he was cautious not to be left alone with her. He didn't like how he felt embarrassed when she looked him head on, or asked him a question, no matter how innocent it was.

He was not afraid of her, he was afraid of himself. He was afraid of the strange sensation he felt when she arrived at the house, and the strange feeling of emptiness when she left. Most of all, he hated the strange burning in his chest whenever his friends asked him if she was asked if she was single.

Was it…jealousy?

Eriol shook his head to rid those thoughts. No, he was married. It didn't matter who showed interest in Madison.

Some children approached Madison, as they often did, with hand-picked flowers. Madison looked up and the children who swarmed around her. One of the threw their pudgy arms around her neck and said something which made her laugh in the way that made Eriol smile. They pulled at Madison, each trying to get her attention.

She said she didn't like children, yet Eriol found her very natural around them. She didn't throw them attention or scold them. Her sarcasm and bluntness were something they squealed in laughter at. Perhaps they have broken her.

A sad thought passed through Eriol's mind.

Children.

It was something he and Ruby had of course wanted. In fact, it was the only thing Ruby wanted more than anything else in the world. But after the fifth miscarriage, Eriol couldn't take it anymore. Each time they dared to get their hopes up, tragedy followed. Eriol couldn't bear to see Ruby suffer through the loss of another child. Not to even mention what it did to her health. The last miscarriage was too much of a toll on her, he nearly lost his wife.

The smile Eriol had a moment ago evaporated.

He didn't want to go there.

He had told himself last time that he didn't want children anymore. It was not an option for them. Despite the rumours and pestering from some villagers, there would be no Hiirigazawa heir.

Tomoyo had a child sitting in her lap and talking amicably about something Tomoyo probably didn't care for. But she waited patiently from the child to finish before uttering something short that made them burst out laughing.

Eriol smiled. She'd be a good mother.

She shooed them away and picked up a basket. The children swarmed around to help her. She brushed a black lock of hair from her eyes and looked up, catching Eriol staring. Eriol knew he should have looked away, but didn't.

Tomoyo kept their stare and grinned in a way that felt…ambiguous, like they were in on a secret.

"Unbelievable." He heard his mother muter from behind him. He was thankful because it broke off his gaze.

Mrs Hiirigazawa dropped this week's edition of _'Tomoedan Mirror'_ onto his lap and scoffed.

"I read it." Eriol said.

"And? How dare she! Making it out that we're all 'happy-go-lucky' here. Ha! You wouldn't think that she's Kinomoto Fujitaka's daughter, now would you?"

Eriol grunted as a response but didn't look to her.

Mrs Hiirigazawa raised an eyebrow at her son, who seemed rather despondent lately.

"What do you mean, 'mm'? Doesn't this worry you? This reporter can say anything about us and people will read it."

"Sales are up." Eriol responded.

"Excuse me?"

"I said, sales are up." He repeated and handed her a page.

She grabbed it and scanned its contents. "An order placement…from the North?" She said in astonishment. "A private company too?"

Eriol nodded. He still didn't know what to make of Sakura, but as far as money was concerned, she just made bucket loads for his village by dispelling the rumour that circulated around them.

"I don't understand." She stuttered.

"The article must have gone down well with the North. Private companies want our supply. None of this military-middle-man-bullshit."

Mrs Hiirigazawa scratched her head. It was indeed, good news, but…

"It's still wrong." She concluded. "She shouldn't be making us out this way. People still don't know the truth."

Eriol had stopped listening. He was just…fed up with his mother's constant hunger for more. He didn't want to hear it anymore. Eriol sighed. He knew the situation warranted more of his attention but he felt his brain give up. There were too many things to worry about.

His eyes found Tomoyo again. Thinking about her, no matter how much he didn't want to do that, it distracted him. There was no politics around her, no negotiation crises or percentages or ratios or…illness.

She was just...Madison.

He thought about the dream he had about her. That shameful, shameful dream. He wondered about the feel of her skin against his, her breath against his neck and her hands…

He shook his head.

"Are you listening to me?" His mother said in her harsh tone.

Eriol felt the immediate shame and guilt come back. He had to stop thinking like that. Her was married. Married, married, married. He reasoned with himself. It had been so long since he and Ruby had sex. Between his work and her frailty, they just didn't…

He was a husband, but he was still a man. He blocked these thoughts by burying himself with work. But when he seen Madison, he just couldn't stop.

"The reporter is coming back tomorrow. Do we tell Toya?" Eriol asked.

Mrs Hiirigazawa was about to answer but snapped her head up. "It depends."

"On what?"

"On what he's coming over here to tell us."

Eriol saw Toya make his way through the fields towards them. A burning look in his eyes.

X x x

"Ah…Sya…Syaoran…"

Syaoran's hips struggled to resist thrusting faster.

One of her hands weaved through his hair and the other gripped his shoulder. Her moans were muffled between his kisses.

She threw her head back in ecstasy. The thrill and the danger of their situation was an aphrodisiac for them both. The excitement built for them as Syaoran thrusted faster.

"Wait," She said suddenly and pushed a hand against his chest. Sakura sat up, wide eyes.

"Sakura-"

She put a finger to his lips to silence him. He suppressed a groan of annoyance. Sakura looked at the window and listened intently.

Syaoran took her hands into his and brought her to face him.

"You're being paranoid."

Sakura opened her mouth but closed it. "It's just, my dad said he'll be back in a few hours. He didn't say when-"

"I know, I know," He hummed and kissed the soft skin between her breasts. "We will hear him if he comes back, we have time."

Sakura wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed the top of his head as his mouth found her nipple. The worries look on her face remained. She was being paranoid. But she couldn't even begin explaining something like this is she were caught.

Sakura bit her lip with please and began to rock back and forth on his hardness. They held their naked bodies tight against each other and found their rhythm again. She gripped his shoulder and bit her lip listening to his manly groans.

She quivered in his arms as she climaxed, he followed shortly after her.

They lay tangled in each other's embrace as their heartbeats began to fall into normal beat again. It was risky for Syaoran to come here. But he was glad he did. He knew Fujitaka's schedule. He saw opportunity and grabbed it.

"You should go." She said dreamily yet kept her legs tangled between his.

"Kicking me out already? I'm starting to think you're just using me." He said with a smirk.

She smiled and put on her short dressing gown.

Downstairs Sakura boiled the kettle. She needed to work on a strategy for going back into the West.

Syaoran put his boots on and glanced at his watch. He knew Fujitaka shouldn't be back for at least another hour. But he didn't want to stall and take the chance.

When she returned to the living room Syaoran was eyeing up a card on the mantlepiece. His expression went from amused to quickly unimpressed.

"Tsukishiro called around?" He asked, failing to hide his tone.

Sakura shuffled and shrugged. "He wanted to be nice." She said defensively. Of course, Yukito sent her a card and a ridiculous over the top bouquet of flowers on her article being published. It was unnecessary, but a reminder that Yukito still pined for her affections.

Syaoran placed the card back but the mood had shifted.

She smirked and wrapped an arm around his waist.

"Are you jealous?" She asked playfully which made him roll his eyes.

He placed his hands on both sides of her face. "Should I be?"

"He sends me flowers." She said teasingly.

"Do you even like flowers?" He asked wrapping his arms around her waist.

"No. They're just a chore. Annoying gift, if you ask me."

"I read your article." He said as he broke away from her to put on his jacket.

"And?" Sakura asked, feeling anxious. He didn't mention it at all when he arrived, she wondered if he bothered to read it at all.

He nodded. "I liked it."

Sakura nodded but her expression dropped which aroused his suspicion. "

"What?"

"Nothing." She said, but her stance suggested there was something on her mind.

"Tell me." He said, feeling like this would not go well.

Her eyes, which were so light and playful began to sink to a worrying look. She looked away.

 _Oh no, this won't be good_. He thought.

"It's just It wasn't what I expected. The West." She said lightly and recalled the state of the poor children and the working conditions they were in. It was gnawing at her mind.

"Maybe you shouldn't go back there."

"Did you know that there were no hospitals in the West? That they have to treat themselves?" She tried to sound light, like it was a normal question.

Syaoran stiffened. She saw his shoulders tense.

"They get what they need." He said.

Though his words were said softly, Sakura flinched. His words were so…so mechanical.

"But…surly people are dying because of this? What do they do in an emergency-"

"Do you have proof of that? Did you come across any evidence of this?" He said suddenly which made her jump. In a split second, everything changes.

"Syaoran, I-"

"Then you shouldn't make assumptions." He said.

Sakura widened her eyes. She couldn't fathom how quickly he transitioned from her lover to soldier in such a short amount of time.

"I wasn't." She said defensively balling her fists. "But I was there. I saw the kids, how the people live and-"

"The way they live is a consequence of their own doing. I suggest you just accept that."

Sakura tensed. Was he warning her? She crossed her arms to keep them from shaking. "So, you do know, you just don't care."

That hit a nerve with Syaoran. Sakura couldn't figure out if he meant it, or was he just reading off a pre-taught script. He flinched when she said that. She was going into dangerous territory. He wanted her to stop there. _Please, don't go any further._

"That's where you were going to send me, right? You said I was close to relocation. You think I deserve that life?" She asked, taking a step forward. She knew she should have stopped. This was only going to end painfully.

"That's different, you're still here, aren't you?" He said irritated.

"Yeah, only because you wanted to fuck me! Now you have, what's stopping you from sending me away?" She didn't know where this burst of anger was coming from.

"I told you," He said walking right up to her. "to stop talking like this. I can't protect you if you keep running your mouth off like this."

That made Sakura angry. "I don't need you to protect me." She spat and turned away from him.

He grabbed her by the arm and reeled her back angrily. She began to resist but that made him tighten his grip.

"Why? Because that Tsukishiro guy will? The one you were engaged to? Is he your back-up? Are you fucking him too?"

"Oh my God. You are jealous, aren't you? Even if I did want to sleep with him, it's nothing to do with you." She yanked her arm free from his grip.

"So what is this then?" He shouted. "You're just fucking around with me? Are you going to drop me like you did him? Or maybe you just like to mind-fuck with people. Like some kind of sick joke."

Sakura didn't know how the conversation flipped from dissidence to her sexual life.

"Fuck you, Syaoran. You don't know anything about me."

"I know _everything_ about you." He said stabbing a finger at her.

"Fine, then do it. Send me away, I dare you. It's not like you don't have the power to." She said coming right up to him with her fists balled by her sides.

"You're driving me crazy." He said rubbing his temples. She was giving him a headache. He couldn't take it anymore. It wasn't just her earlier question that was tormenting him. Everything about her was addictive and tormenting.

Was she dissident? Was she using him? Was he using her? Was he jealous? Does she know where Toya is? Does anyone? Should he be sleeping with her? Should he stop? Did he want to? Did she?

It wasn't just him it was bothering. These thoughts often possessed Sakura's mind too. But when he touched her, they disappeared. This was the first time in their intimate relationship that politics entered.

"I didn't keep you here because I wanted to 'fuck you.'" He said calmly. She could see the hurt in his eyes. She felt guilty for asking such a question. If he just wanted her body, he could have had it. Either forcefully or through intimidation. Sakura was just and Eastern woman. Her voice held no power against the General's son.

Sakura felt her chest tighten. This was not how she expected this evening to turn out.

"Then why did you?" She whispered.

Syaoran sighed. "We've been through this."

"And yet I'm still clueless."

Syaoran turned to leave. He couldn't stay in this situation. It was breaking his moral consciousness.

"I don't know what you want me to do, Sakura. Do you want me to send you to the West? Is that what you're asking from me?"

"Would you do it?" She asked quietly. She wanted to know how far she could push him. It went beyond a clash of opinions. Was he like the other soldiers? She couldn't accept that she felt so strongly about someone who thought so differently to her.

Syaoran couldn't answer.

"No." He said after a while. His voice was so vulnerable that resisted the urge to run to him. "I…couldn't."

He turned to leave, again.

"It's wrong." She said which stopped him in his tracks. "It's all wrong, what happens to those people. There, I said it." She said with a small shrug.

Syaoran exhaled painfully. He knew she was trying to push him.

She walked over slowly to him and touched his hand. "And I think you think so too. I've only seen a part of it. You've seen so much more. You…you know it's wrong."

He looked her in the eyes. There was a defeat there. An unspoked truth. Syaoran had resisted giving into these thoughts to the point where he became numb. Oh, yes. Syaoran had seen so many things happen in the West. Unspeakable things. Things that made him hide behind a desk for years until his father made him Colonel Lieutenant and forced him to face it and accept it.

Yes, Syaoran knew it was wrong.

But he was a soldier.

Sakura couldn't change that.

But she was challenging it.

Sakura saw him struggle to answer. She knew he wouldn't, he couldn't. But there was empathy in him. She was not sleeping with an emotionless cyborg.

She looked down and nodded. She knew he couldn't answer.

"There's nothing." She muttered. Syaoran looked at her. "Between Yukito and I. He shows interest and I don't respond. It's been like that for years. I wouldn't….do that…to you." She whispered but he heard her.

Syaoran nodded and attempted a smile but failed.

He turned towards the door. Sakura hoped he would come back and kiss her, to show that he wasn't mad anymore, but he didn't.

A cool breeze blew through the door. Before shutting it, he turned his head a fraction towards her but didn't look at her. "I don't know how much longer we can do this." He said which made Sakura's blood turn cold.

He closed the door without her response.

X x x

"You'll keep in contact, right?" She asked. Her voice was broken and raspy.

Syaoran suppressed a sign.

"Of course, your majesty. I will call you as soon as I hear anything."

Syaoran heard a sniffle from the other side. "Ok. Even if it's the smallest bit of news. Anything. Please tell me."

For the hundredth time in the past ten minutes, Syaoran agreed.

"We're doing our best. The military is using as many resources as possible." He lied.

"OK…. it's just, I feel so guilty. It's all my fault. I-If I just…If I just…." He heard her voice crack and threaten to give in. "I think about her non-stop. I can't do anything I just feel so helpless. And the lying. I can't lie any more people will suspect-"

"I understand, Queen Sonomi. But for now, you should just stay where you are and try to act normal." Syaoran despised his own words. He knew she was just tormented with worry. And in that worry, she sought out Syaoran's comfort. But he didn't have the time to counsel her through her difficulty.

"I will call you with any update, I promise." He said before hanging up.

Syaoran rubbed the back of his neck and exhaled with frustration. His head was fried. And Sakura was the culprit. He shouldn't have gone to her house, he shouldn't have said anything. But most of all, he shouldn't be letting himself succumb to her words.

 _It's wrong…_

He shook his head. He couldn't think about what was right and wrong. He was a soldier, he had to carry out orders. But in the back of his mind, thoughts he kept locked up for years were starting to gnaw at him.

Syaoran had voiced his opinion once, and never again.

He remembered the look his father gave him when Syaoran questioned the fairness of Western life. He remembered that look well. He also remembered it was the first time his father raised his voice and his fist but never struck. Syaoran still had the fear of that moment imprinted in his mind. It made him shiver. He was only a child then. But that was when he learned an important lesson.

You don't question. Thing are how they are, because that's how they are.

It was his mantra to get him through any crises of the conscience. And Sakura was beginning to undo all of that.

 _I should end it._ He thought. It wasn't safe to be around he anymore. It was the sensible thing to do. He had to let her go.

He went out to the training field to clear his mind. The training field was empty. Syaoran had heard that the cadets were practicing in the highlands of the West. They were advancing quickly under Meiling's iron fist. For what, though, Syaoran was unsure.

He leaned against the metal fence and remembered a time when he was a cadet himself. He thought of the comradery at that time. Even he didn't know why he was there.

On the other side of the field, Syaoran could make out someone standing. He squinted and saw it was a cadet. As he walked toward them it was unmistakably Cadet Chiharu.

As he closed in his smile evaporated and was replaced with worry as his feet sprinted towards her.

He stopped in his tracks momentarily.

The only thing recognisable about her was the two bright blonde pigtails sprouting from both sides of her beat up face. Her eyes were shut, one was swollen. Syaoran would have thought she was dead other that the fact she was standing on the box and holding a bucket over her head.

The heat of the midday sun and the stress of holding the bucket of water was causing her to sweat profusely.

"Chi-Chiharu?" He stammered. "What are you doing?"

Chiharu didn't react. Her arms quivered under the bucket. Only when he called her name again did her head lift up slightly. Her non-swollen eye found him for a second before glancing down again.

"Chiharu, come down. What are you doing?"

Syaoran came to take the bucket from her before she recoiled and shook her head. No noise came from her mouth. He saw she was fighting back tears.

"Chiharu, why…why are you here? What happened to your face?"

She refused to answer. Tears broke free and streamed over the blood on her cheeks. Decided this was ridiculous he stepped forward and tried to take the bucket from her.

"No-" She snapped suddenly. "No, please don't." She whispered. "I can't be seen talking to anyone. Please go."

"Who did this to you?"

He thought she wouldn't answer. Someone had petrified her into silence. Finally, she whispered. "Lieutenant Meiling."

"Why?"

"I-I was talking again. She said she was sick of me…always talking. She said if I moved from this spot or spoke to anyone I'd be punished more."

"This is ridiculous."

"It's not just me. She's threatened us all. She's…she's so brutal. If we don't do drills right we're punished, if don't answer her right…we're punished. It's hell."

"Chi-"

"Colonel Lieutenant…please don't. Please…just let me do my punishment. Please…"

Syaoran would have insisted, but the fear in her young face broke his heart. She was so petrified.

Syaoran nodded and tore himself away. Every step he took was heavy but raged with thoughts of Meiling. She was looking control.

X x x

"I see." She said in a casual tone.

Syaoran didn't think she was grasping the seriousness of the situation.

"She's out of control, General Lieutenant." Syaoran said, trying to keep a lid on his anger. "She needs to be reeled in."

General Lieutenant Mizuki simply nodded but kept her eyes fixed on her clipboard. Her office was exactly like her, sterile and clinical. No books, just files and files of data.

"I really think you should speak to her." He said after a few more seconds of silence.

General Lieutenant Mizuki pried her eyes from her notes to look at him. "And why is that?"

Syaoran opened his mouth to speak but found himself surprised by her reaction. "Because...for all the reasons I mentioned."

"And what was that? Punishing a Cadet who has misbehaved? I don't really see the problem here."

"It's not the act of punishment, but more the punishment itself." He said feeling his temper rise. "I don't think beating the cadets to a pulp is appropriate-"

"Regardless." She interrupted. "of what you may or may not think is appropriate, Lieutenant Meiling Li is making stunning progress with the cadets. They are already competent at rifle usage-"

"They're using rifles? What for?" Syaoran's outburst caused Mizuki to raise an eyebrow. She did not take well to Syaoran's tone.

"For Utopia." She said in a strong voice. "Lieutenant Colonel, Lieutenant Li can punish the Cadets any way she sees fit as long as she's doing her job. I highly suggest you leave it be."

Syaoran turned to leave. She wouldn't do anything about it. He felt so helpless. Meiling was spiralling out of control.

"How goes the search for Kinomoto Toya?"

Syaoran stalled. He didn't answer.

"I'd focus less on what Meiling's doing and focus on yours. Your father is worried you're not up for the task."

That stung, ash she knew if would. Syaoran turned to leave but something stopped him.

"Why are there no hospitals in the West?"

Mizuki raised her eyebrow at such a question and then sneered.

"They get what they need. Who cares if some dirty farmer dies?"

As Syaoran left her office a thought circled his mind. He could hear her voice.

 _It's wrong._

X x x

"This is a camera."

"I know what a camera is." She said and half rolled her eyes.

"Good, saves me the trouble of explaining it to you. You can take two pictures a day. _Two_. Did you hear me? Only two pictures."

"Yes, I heard you. Two."

"This, this will be your work phone. It only has my number on it but do not dare call me unless you are in danger or something major happens. Do you understand? All calls are monitored so don't even think about calling another number. Understand? Do not do anything stupid. Look at me, look at me, don't call me unless it's serious. Do you understand?"

Sakura gave him an irritated look and took the phone from his hands. "What if I break a nail? Can I call you then?"

"I'm not amused he said." Yue replied and lit a cigarette.

"You seem stressed boss. I thought you were happy about this whole _'Western Wonders'_ thing."

Yue took a drag out of his cigarette. "I am stressed. You seem to add to it."

Sakura shrugged and smile innocently. "I apologise for that. I'll be more considerate of your stress levels in the future."

Yue rolled his eyes. They had developed an odd relationship. Sakura still saw him as an intimidating boss but she felt like she could talk him around things. For instance, talk him down from three soldiers patrolling her at all times to just one. Or extending her time in the west from two hours to three and a half.

"Do you want me to walk you through you itinerary again?"

"No boss, I got it. Interview some ladies, ask them about their pastimes, walk around some fields and pick some Mirth. It's all so…thrilling." She said sarcastically. Yue knew she didn't want to talk about Western home cooking, or hear lies about everyday life. But she would take the opportunity to visit the West.

"And watch your tongue."

"I get it." She said and flinched when the soldiers hand got too near her breast. She didn't like getting patted down by soldiers for security check every time she went in and out of the walls. They were rough and a little bit to thorough for her liking.

"Easy." Yue said and glared at one of them.

"Any problem," He repeated. "Call me."

X x x

Sakura found herself back at the Hiirigazawa house.

The soldier behind her was annoyingly close.

After a few knocks the door opened. Sakura looked up and saw familiarity in the face of the woman looking down at her.

Tomoyo made a tight smile raised and raised an eyebrow. "Oh, goody. The reporter and her notebook are back. How nice."

"Somehow I don't think you're being sincere." Sakura said and tilted her head to the side.

Tomoyo smirked and walked into the house, leaving the door open.

"Oh, Ms Kinomoto. You're early." Ruby said with a smile and poured some tea into a cup. Sakura smiled but felt sorrow for Ruby. She had forgotten how weak the girl had looked. The maid, who Sakura knew as Madison walked to the sink to dry some cups while keeping an eye on Sakura.

"Yes. I was very eager to start." Sakura replied.

"Well, ah, my husband won't be home for another half hour. Would you like to sit and wait?"

"Thank you but I really must get to work straight away."

Tomoyo was amused by the sterility of Sakura' voice. Tomoyo guessed they were around the same age yet Sakura's manner was very formal and distant…cold even.

"Oh well, I suppose I could show you around." Ruby offered which made Sakura uncomfortable.

"I don't think that would be…wise." Tomoyo interjected. Ruby's immune system was weak at the moment. Even Ruby accepted it was best not to move around much.

"But…ah…Ms Kinomoto…she needs someone to show her around."

"Well I guess she'll have to swing by another time." Tomoyo said with a winning smile.

"Or, you can show me around?" Sakura counter-offered with a glint in her eyes that made Tomoyo's smirk collapse from her face. "Considering you're a local and all."

Tomoyo narrowed her eyes but Ruby delighted in the suggestion. "Oh yes! That'd be great! Madison, you can take hr to the fields and show her the market, there's fair taking place there now."

Tomoyo huffed before ripping her bandana from her head and tossing her apron on the table.

X x x

Sakura scribbled down notes as they walked through the fields. She notices that labourers were less likely to speak to her than people from the market.

Tomoyo rolled her eyes at every little question she asked. How many hours do you work? What is Mirth used for? How is it produced?

"Dunno." Tomoyo answered to most of her questions.

As they walked through the fields of Mirth, a child rushed up to Tomoyo and handed her a fist full of strangled daisies. Sakura saw Tomoyo's face soften as she took them from the child's hands and shooed him away with a smile. Sakura noted that Tomoyo was quite popular.

Sakura looked up. Tomoyo was beautiful, even with her air of arrogance she didn't need to ponder on why she was admired.

"Let's take a break." Sakura suggested.

"Fine. But not here. I don't want to be seen lunching with you." She said and stalked off.

They sat on a hill that overlooked the fields and Sakura was captured by its beauty.

"Ugh. Go away." Tomoyo said at the accompanying soldier. He froze, unable to absorb her commanding attitude. "Just sit over there and let us talk. Don't worry I don't plan on stabbing her."

The soldier, who was young and intimidated by Tomoyo's beauty and command, sat halfway down the hill to eat alone. Tomoyo was no longer afraid of being recognised by patrolling soldiers. She had changed so much she barely recognised herself. Her skin, which was once milky white had tanned quickly from hours of field work. Her palms were tough from labour and even her hair had lightened in the sun. She was a very different woman from the one that came here what seemed an eternity ago.

"You don't like at all, do you?" Sakura asked when they settled down.

Tomoyo shrugged. "I don't think about you enough to _not like_ you." She said. That was a lie. Although Tomoyo didn't dislike Sakura, she was weary of her. Maybe because she was anxious under her calculating green eyes. She feared Sakura would see through her lies and say something like, _Found you!_

Sakura chuckled. "Fair enough." And scribbled into her notebook.

"Are you always this…intense." Tomoyo asked and picked at a loose seam on her skirt.

Sakura looked up and blinked. "Excuse me?"

"It's just…you seen so intense. Always scribbling into that notebook. What could possibly be so interesting about the West that you'd want to write about it?" Tomoyo had made this observation when she first met Sakura whose face was young but always scrunched up in intense thought. Tomoyo thought she should live a little.

"What could possibly be interesting enough for you to relocate here?"

Tomoyo's hand froze.

Sakura was looking straight at her. "I'm interested in your story Madison."

"You want to put me in your little story?"

"No. I'm just curious. What was so bad about where you came from that you came here? What is this life offering you?"

Tomoyo swallowed. "Things I don't want to talk about."

Sakura frowned, she was hoping to get somewhere.

"They're good people." Tomoyo murmured. "They're kind and humble and sincere. I didn't have that where I came from."

"It must make you angry to see them live like this then." Sakura risked saying which grabbed Tomoyo's attention. "Compared to how your people live. Whatever side of the walls that may be."

Tomoyo smiled wickedly. "Ah, so this reporter isn't as good as I thought. You know if I walked down to that soldier there and told him what you just said you'd be in a lot of trouble." She said winningly.

"And if I told him that you weren't as local as you claim, I'm sure he'd have a hard time figuring out which one of us to arrest first."

They were at a stand-off but it was Tomoyo's face to break first. "Touché."

Sakura sighed and began to write notes again. Madison would never warm to her enough to trust her.

"And there she goes again, scribbling into her notebook with that intense look."

Sakura snapped her notebook shut.

"I am _not_ intense, I just like my work. I can be fun too."

Tomoyo laughed. "Are you always this serious? My God it must be stressful being you."

"No-no." She said defensively. "I can be…"

"What? Wild."

"Yes."

"Ok, tell me the wildest thing you've ever done."

Sakura felt so stupid rising to Tomoyo's tricks to annoy her. She wanted to say that she currently undercover trying to build a case against the government, that she doing something so illegal but of course, she couldn't.

"That's what I thought." Tomoyo said and looked down at the soldiers. Tomoyo squinted as she saw another soldier rise from the bottom of the hill. He stopped to speak to the younger soldier. Tomoyo saw the other soldiers face and gasped.

"What's wrong?" Sakura asked but Tomoyo grabbed her wrist.

"You want to do something fun?" She said not replying to her but there was haste in her voice.

Sakura blinked, not liking the devilment in her voice.

"Come on, prove to me that you're not a prude."

Sakura looked down to see the young soldier was descending down the hill with the other. Why was he leaving? And who was the other soldier?

She looked back into Tomoyo's waiting eyes before nodding.

"Sure."

X x x

"I…I don't know…" Sakura said looking at the white thing in Tomoyo's hand.

"Ugh, come on. It's not even that strong. The effects ware off after like, five minutes."

"Then why bother?"

"Forget it." Tomoyo said and rolled her eyes. She began to stuff it back into her pocket.

"No, wait." Sakura said and held her hand out. She couldn't help it. She was curious.

Tomoyo smirked and placed the rolled-up joint into her hand. "And the effects only last a few minutes? Cause if I get caught-"

"You won't get caught! The soldiers left and it's not like they're going to come into this random shed. We won't leave until you're down from your high."

Sakura hesitated. She felt like this went against her sensibilities but there was a streak of curiosity in her. Drugs were very rarely heard of in her University. They were offered once in a blue moon but she declined. It was strictly illegal in the East.

But she wasn't in the East, technically.

This joint was not strong by any means. Just enough for Tomoyo to feel at ease. She was shown how to put it together by other labourers who occasionally indulged in it. Compared to what Tomoyo use to be on, this was nothing.

She played with the joint in her hand before bringing it to her lips. She needed a little bit of escape. She wanted something to rid her mind of Syaoran. Their fight had played over and over again in her mind. He hadn't visited her in four days. It bothered her that it bothered her. She fell asleep thinking of him and woke up with him on her mind.

His last words worried her. _I don't know how much longer we can do this._

What did that mean? She asked herself a million times. Did he…break up with her? Were they even together to technically break up. Why did Sakura care so much?

She even began to tell herself that she was wrong. She antagonized over the thought of going to him. But her sensibilities kept her in place.

She took a drag out of it and imagined what Yue would be saying to her right now.

Tomoyo took it from her and did that same.

Sakura sat back and leaned against the wall of the shed. It was tiny and didn't allow much light to flood in.

"So…how long does it take to…oooohhh" Sakura felt a lightness overcome her.

"There you go." Tomoyo nodded with a smile.

X x x

They rolled around the floor laughing.

Sakura held her sides and felt tears prick her eyes. She didn't even remember what Tomoyo said but found it hilarious. Tomoyo took the last drag out of the joint before putting it out.

"Your turn." Sakura said.

"Oh no, I went last time." Tomoyo said swatting her on the shoulder.

"Liar." Sakura scoffed.

"Come on, I've said so much and you've told me nothing juicy."

"You're just lying anyway. I mean, who the hell runs head first into a wall? You'd have to be crazy to do that."

"If you had parents like mine, you would do the same thing!"

"I don't believe you." Sakura said not controlling her giggles and rubbing her eyes. She was getting sleepy now.

Tomoyo threw her arms out. "Well, at least my 'lies' are more scandalous. Ms. Boring."

"Oh yeah," Sakura challenged and sat up. "Well, I'm having an affair with a soldier even though I despise soldiers."

Tomoyo sat up to challenge her. "Madison is not my real name."

"I'm trying to dismantle Utopia by investigating as a journalist!"

"I'm actually the Princess of Tomoeda but I'm posing as a peasant!"

They both burst out laughing at each other, neither of them believing the other's words.

When they calmed down the effects began to ware off. They sat in peace. Sakura didn't remember the last time she laughed so hard she cried. The more she hung out with Madison, despite under illegal circumstances, the more she felt a bond.

Sakura didn't have many friends, or any. She had Rika, but Sakura had always kept her at a distance, afraid to keep anyone close. Syaoran…she had also pushed away. Madison was…she was easy.

"So…why are you here, Madison?"

"I told you." She mumbled with her eyes shut. "I'm the Princess of Tomoeda and I ran away from home so no I'm hiding."

"Stop bullshitting me." Sakura laughed and hugged her knees to her chest.

Tomoyo shrugged.

"Is it because of Mr. Hiirigazawa?"

Tomoyo's eyes bulged. She felt the high evaporate from her immediately.

"I saw how he was around you, the last time I was here. You seemed…close."

Tomoyo swallowed. This girl was sharp.

"I'm not judging." Sakura said. "I was just curious if that's the reason you're staying?"

Tomoyo thought about it. Eriol was the reason she came, the reason she became a maid. But as time progressed she found other reasons to stay. Ruby was one. It was a friendship that meant so much to her. Since the last incident Ruby seemed to be ok. Tomoyo was relieved when she acted normal again. But Tomoyo had put some distance between herself and Eriol. It only seemed to worsen her feelings. She felt drawn to him more than ever.

"Are you in love with him?" Sakura asked.

Tomoyo gulped. "No. I don't think so."

"But, you do…want him. Don't you?"

Tomoyo embraced herself and kept silent. She didn't want to allow her mind to go there.

"He's married." Sakura said, stating the obvious.

Tomoyo nodded. "He's married." She echoed.

"To Ruby."

Tomoyo sighed. She knew all of this of course. Her lust for Eriol and loyalty to Ruby was splitting her mind in two, tormenting her. It wasn't just her. She knew he felt it too. He was watching her. Tomoyo could always feel his eyes on her. There was a heat between them when they were together. She knew he felt it too. It sent her heart racing and her groin tingle.

"I don't know why I stay." Tomoyo said. "Maybe it's him, maybe it's because I just love labour work." She smirked.

"Are you ever serious?" Sakura laughed.

"Are you ever not?"

They both giggled but then their thoughts went off into different places.

"I think the effects wore off." Sakura said and Tomoyo nodded.

They both flinched as the shed door suddenly. The both spun their heads around to see Eriol peer down at them in surprise. The smell of Mirth and other herbs floating in the air.

"What are you both doing in here?"

Sakura's mind panicked as she scrambled for a reason. Tomoyo said calmly and with a small flirtatious smile; "Girl talk. Boys wouldn't understand."

Eriol clenched his jaw and looked from one to the other. "The previous soldier changed shift with another. The new one is looking for you outside." He said to Sakura.

She jumped up and nodded before passing him with her head down in embarrassment. Tomoyo followed her but was stopped by Eriol's arm, which blocked her way.

"What are you doing? Do you want to get yourself into trouble?" He whispered. It was stupid to take drugs with an outsider. Who knows what she would say about them.

Tomoyo smiled up at him and took a second to relish the blueness of his eyes. They haven't been so physically close in a while, she wanted him terribly.

"I'm always looking for trouble." She whispered before sliding by him.

She shouldn't be so suggestive with him.

But sometimes, she couldn't help it.

X x x

Sakura descended down the hill towards the soldier.

Her eyes were burning from emerging into the harsh sunlight. She wondered why the previous soldier had been replaced but didn't ponder on it too much. She regretted giving into Madison's childish taunts. She was a twenty-two year old woman and yet succumbed to a childish tactic. But when she thought of her time with Madison, she smiled. She hoped they would speak again, although in a more legal situation.

Another good thing about today was she got more than enough information to write her next article. She wished she could have spoken to Eriol more. She had a feeling he'd be more forthcoming with the truth.

When she reached the bottom of the hill the soldier had his back to her.

"Are we heading back to the South?" She asked and slipped her notebook into her bag.

The soldier didn't reply and stalked forwards in a quick pace. Sakura had to half skip behind him to keep up. He was much taller than the last one. His cap was kept low, she could not see his face.

"Um, are we going the right way?" She asked. Again, no reply.

They were heading towards a thick forest, away from the farmers and security of other patrolling soldiers. When Sakura's feet hit the faded dirt path that led into the forest she knew something was wrong. The soldier was a few paces ahead of her and didn't stop.

She followed hesitantly but with each step, the weight of suspicion got heavier.

She stopped. Clutching the strap of her bag her heart began to thump loud, warning beats. The soldier stopped, sensing she wasn't following.

Suddenly Sakura realized what was happening. Perhaps he realized she took drugs and was going to punish her. It was paranoid thinking but she wondered if Madison was trying to trap her. Did Sakura fall for it? Were there consequences?

Suddenly the soldier turned his heel and within three long strides he was by her side. Before she could react, he grabbed her elbow and dragged her forward. Her legs struggled to keep her upright as he brought her deeper and deeper into the forest. A scream was caught in her throat. Terror stuck her until finally she began to fight back.

She dug her heels into the dirt, turned around and began to beat him with her first. The only thing she managed to do was knock off his cap.

He caught her small fists and held her against a tree.

Through her kicks and screams she heard his voice, calmly and lowly say; "Sakura."

Tiredness calmed her body but she still struggled against him until she found herself not being pinned down, but in an embrace. Her arms were pressed against his chest, unable to move. She stood still and furrowed her brows.

He hugged her deeper which only made Sakura more nervous.

He rested his cheek on her head and said softly; "I can't believe the monster is all grown up."

Sakura felt a shock shoot up her spine.

Only one person ever called her that.

She took a step back and slowly allowed her eyes to meet his face. Though he may be taller, his hair longer and his eyes…darker… she recognized him.

She began to slowly shake her head in disbelief, tears threatening to come to the surface.

It simply couldn't be.

As if he could read her thoughts, he smiled warmly and nodded.

"…Toya…"

 **This is only half of the chapter I was supposed to upload but as usual, I can't seem to write short chapters, that's why there isn't too much happening in this chapter. So hopefully I can upload the second half very soon!**

 **I hope you enjoyed!**

 **R &R! **


	16. My Most Honest Lies

**Please Enjoy. :)**

 _Dwight Dunne was dealt and unfortunate hand in life._

 _Being an only child to an alcoholic mother, he was already at a disadvantage in the South before he could even learn to talk._

 _After his mother killed herself and, deciding that the foster care system to too traumatic to remain in, Dwight enlisted into military school when he was sixteen. Being a late starter and having a lack of social skills left him at the bottom rank._

 _After barely managing to graduate he was transferred to the West to be a paper pusher. Hours and hours locked up in a cabin with no work colleagues eventually drove him into the depths of depression._

 _His saving grace, a young handsome westerner who showed kindness._

 _Dwight didn't realize his own homosexuality until he fell quickly in love with the young man whose name he never revealed. They were the same height and build, but this westerner had a silent beauty about him. Dwight, in his loneliness told the westerner secrets of the South, their schedule, the ins and outs the military. Where guns and tanks and secrets were hidden. It felt so good to speak to another human being, to have another person listen. Dwight considered dismissing himself from his duties to be with the young man. Elated with love he poured his heart out._

 _The young westerner listened and reserved judgment. Satisfied that Dwight had no family or friends to care for him, and that his job was so meaningless that no one would question his whereabouts or duties, the young westerner strangled Dwight until the whites of his eyes stained red and his eyes became empty and vacant._

 _The young westerner dumped his body into a poorly dug hole in the middle of the woods where nobody would ever find him. He took his uniform and cap. Perfect fit. Looking at his own reflection, he could have sworn he was a soldier himself._

 _He never thought of Dwight again._

 _When Toya saw an opportunity, he always pounced._

X x x

"But…I don't…H-how did you?..." She stuttered but couldn't form the right sentence.

Sakura had so much to ask yet couldn't bring her mind to focus enough. She was terrified to look away in case it was all just a dream. But there he was. She thought he was thinner. There was a meaner, tougher look to his face but she knew it was her brother. Brought back from the dead. When she calmed down she busted into tears of raw emotion. It took her half an hour to calm down after Toya brought her to Eriol's house.

They were in the Hiirigazawa house now. Madison, Ruby and Eriol and Mrs Hiirigazawa had made themselves busy and were awkwardly shuffling around the back garden.

"I don't like this." Eriol murmured.

"You think I do?" Mrs Hiirigazawa whispered and cast an eye towards the house. "If they get caught here-"

"He won't. He never gets caught." Eriol muttered. He was always in disbelief at how much Toya got away with. Toya had snuck in and out of the walls in that sham of a soldiers uniform so effortlessly it was almost laughable. "But that's not the point. Why is he taking his business here?"

"We want to stay in the loop, don't we? I doubt he'll tell her everything."

"What do you think they're muttering about?" Tomoyo asked while helping Ruby hang up the laundry.

Ruby shrugged and sat down. She felt light-headed. "Don't know. They're always whispering about something. Best to let them get on with it."

She coughed and Tomoyo pretended not to be worried.

"Hey, what do you think about the reporter? Appears out of nowhere and now she's related to Toya? Do you think she's…you know, as extreme as him?"

Tomoyo looked back at the house. She smirked.

"I think she's too sensible to be extreme." Tomoyo concluded. She decided to reserve judgement.

Sakura felt dizzy with the sudden revelation.

"I know." He said and put his hand on hers. Even that single gesture brought her back on the verge of tears. She couldn't keep herself together.

"Why are you here? As a journalist? For the _Tomoedan Mirror?"_

"Oh, it's…it's…I don't know. Trust me, that article I wrote was not what I intended. I was just looking for a reason to get into the West." She said honestly. It was so nice not to have to think of lies or cover up for someone.

"Wow, my sister, so cunning." He smirked and crossed his arms. He was amazed at how she had grown since last time. But there was something about her that was different. She was sterner, more intense than the last time they spoke.

"I thought you were dead." She said, her voice dropping with edge. "We thought you were dead for years."

A sorrowful look passed over his face. "I'm sorry. I did what I had to do at that time." He answered rubbing his arm and looking away. Sakura thought she sense remorse or shame there.

"What does that mean?" She asked.

Toya look down at his hands. His palms were rough and callous from the years or building up and perseverance, but it wouldn't be for nothing. He looked up at his baby sister. Strike that, she wasn't a baby anymore. She was a woman. A journalist.

"Don't worry about it, Sakura."

"No, I will. I thought you were dead but as it turns out, you've been in the West the whole time?" Toya sensed the frustration in her voice. "Why didn't you ever try to find us? You let me and dad think we lost you. We even buried you. You have a grave stone." Her voice cracked. "…I visit it every week."

Toya felt a weight in his heart. But he didn't want to tell her. If he did, then she'd be torn.

"And…why are you wearing a soldier's uniform?" She asked. It only struck her as odd when she calmed down. The uniform was only slightly tattered, but it raised even more questions.

"I…found it." He lied. "And it makes it easy to slip in and out of the walls."

"You…what?" She said blinking in disbelief.

"These soldiers, they may seem like they know everything but…they're not that bright on this side of the wall. Well, not this deep into the West anyway. They're just concerned with the border. They see a uniform and a key card and they just nod you in."

"Toya, you've been going in and out of the walls?"

"Only into the East, I rarely risk the South or North. They're on higher alert there."

"Ok…" She said raising an eyebrow. "But…why? Why are you going between the walls?"

Toya looked away.

"Why is everyone keeping secrets?" She asked frustrated. "That's not fair Toya. You can't just disappear for five years and not give me any explanation, no reason. It's not fair!" She said and balled her fists. "Dad was distraught when you left." She whispered. "He went out looking for you every single day for a month until the military showed up and told him to stop looking."

Her voice was reduced to a sad whisper as she spoke of those dark times. She recalled how Fujitaka would go out at night and stay out until the early hours of the morning, only to return even more distraught. Sakura remembered the stabbing pain in her heart when he returned with no news of Toya. The agony of waiting and feelings of hopelessness she went through seemed to drag on forever until she heard Toya's name on the radio, pronounced dead.

Toya nodded. "You're right. It's just…It's just all so messy Sakura. I don't want you to get hurt."

"Spare me the emotional crap." She said sternly. "I want answers. I deserve them."

Toya flinched at her words. When she looked at him dead on with that determined voice he could see that the woman before him had toughened since he saw her last. He was so concerned with protecting her like he used to. She didn't need protection, she was an adult now. She toughened up in his absence. She was becoming their mother. It scared him, and made him proud at the same time.

He smiled weakly and nodded.

"The day before my interview test, I ran away." He began.

Sakura nodded. She remembered. She remembered the stress Fujitaka was under over him. Toya and her father fought constantly about it. Toya was even more reluctant than she was to do the interview. Self-destructive behaviour must just run in the family. But the morning of, Toya had disappeared.

"Why? You didn't want to take the test?"

"That's part of it." He confessed. "But only a part."

Sakura didn't say anything. She waited on him to elaborate. "I was part of a group. An anti-governmental group. It was to build up the rebellion. Me and a few other people-"

"Like Kero Jones?"

"Yeah…Like Kero." Toya looked away for a moment. Sakura saw sadness in his eyes. "He was stupid. I told him not to go into the East. The military were suspicious of his whereabouts. But he went anyway. Idiot."

Sakura decided not to tell him about her encounter with Kero Jones. It wouldn't do anything to help. Then she remembered something Kero said at the time.

 _'_ _Please don't make me hurt you. He'll kill me if anything happens to you.'_

Sakura looked at her brother, who seemed to know more than she realized and wondered if Kero as referring to him. How deep was Toya in all of this? She sighed and looked out the back to where Madison was. Madison didn't hide the fact that she was watching them while doing the laundry. An uneasy look was on her face.

Sakura parted her lips to ask the question niggling in her mind. "Toya, why didn't you come see me? Or dad? You don't know how much it would have meant to us to know you were still alive."

There was a heavy pause. Toya looked at her in a way that told her she wouldn't like what was coming.

"Sakura…dad knows I'm alive."

A few seconds passed by while Sakura tried to digest what he said. She blinked heavily. "What?"

"I did come back to our home. Once. Then never again…"

"I-I don't understand."

Toya clenched his jaw. "You can't blame dad. Or be angry at him. At the time, he was doing what was right…"

X x x

 _4 and a half years ago._

 _His breathing was jagged from exhaustion and fear._

 _Yue was right, it was too risky to do this, but he saw an opportunity and took it before he could change his mind. Security wasn't tight enough at the moment. He knew they were still looking for him. He didn't know when he'd get a chance to come here again._

 _Toya, then 22, crouched low and sprinted across the street towards his home. He hopped over the wall and held his breath. No sound._

 _His home before him stood silent and cold as if freezing him out for his abandonment. The spare key was still under the flower pot by the windowsill. His hands trembled. As much as it killed him, he had to be quick._

 _The house was silent. He crept along the hallway and tried to quieten his heavy breathing. He looked upstairs where she would be sleeping. He had planned it out. He would sneak them into the West before eleven p.m., before the guards were on duty._

 _His foot barely tipped the first stair when a light flickered in the living room. Toya jumped with fright and pulled out a small dull knife._

 _Fujitaka stood unthreatened at his son's stance. Toya's breathing was heavy. He was unsure how his father would react. Fujitaka pushed his glasses back to the bridge of his nose and tucked his book under his arm. His face was calm, but there was disappointment in his eyes. Toya felt his chest tighten. He swallowed the lump of guilt in his throat. He didn't have time to feel guilty about running away now._

 _"_ _You don't seem surprised, dad." Toya's voice tried to be strong, but wavered towards the end. "Aren't you happy you're son's alive?"_

 _"_ _Oh no, I am surprised." Fujitaka said with a small smile that confused Toya. "And relieved. I can sleep well, now, knowing that you're alive." His father sighed with relief. Then his eyes turned stony. "Now that I know, you can leave now."_

 _Toya swallowed. "You're not even going to try convince me to stay?"_

 _"_ _No. You made your choice, Toya. Even if you stayed, you didn't do your interview. You broke the law. The military are after you. You can't stay here."_

 _Toya felt his stomach drop. Fujitaka's words were so mechanical, detached. Toya knew all of this. He knew when he left that he could never go back but…to hear his father say it…it cemented that fact._

 _"_ _Don't worry, I'll be leaving soon. But first-"_

 _"_ _No, Toya." He said firmly._

 _"_ _You don't even know why I'm here-"_

 _"_ _The answer is no. You will not take Sakura. I won't allow you. If you want to destroy your own life, do that. But she is just a child."_

 _"_ _She's almost seventeen. She can make that choice for herself."_

 _"_ _No Toya." He said again._

 _Fujitaka had such a gently nature. But when he was firm, he was firm. Toya didn't anticipate he'd approve. That's why he didn't seek out his father's approval._

 _"_ _You will not take Sakura anywhere. There is no discussion. If you attempt to take her I will call the military and tell them where you and the rest of your gang are."_

 _Toya hesitated. "You'd turn in your own son?"_

 _Fujitaka didn't waver. "I don't want to. But I will, if you force my hand."_

 _Toya bit his lip. He glanced upstairs. He missed his sister. I didn't feel right not to be the one to protect her anymore. She looked up to him, and he ran away. Things were rough in the west…and he was lonely._

 _"_ _Can I at least see her? Tell her I'm alive? I just want her to know I'm OK." Toya said and hugged himself._

 _As much as it broke his heart, Fujitaka did not make any moves to comfort his son._

 _"_ _No." He answered._

 _Toya went to protest._

 _"_ _You made your choice Toya. This is the life you wanted."_

 _A silence fell between them._

 _"_ _Leave, Toya. Don't come back to this house."_

 _Toya glanced upstairs one last time. His chest tightened again in pain. He would have to go back alone. It frightened him._

 _Toya left without a word. When the door closed Fujitaka collapsed onto the chair behind him. He took off his glasses and placed them onto the table beside the photo of his deceased wife. Tears finally broke free and spilled down his cheeks. He muffled his cries with his hand. He couldn't wake his daughter, who was sleeping oblivious upstairs._

 _His son had signed his own death warrant. He would see to it that his daughter would not go down the same path, no matter what._

 _Toya was alive, thank God._

 _But he could never return to his home. Fujitaka would not risk past deeds affecting his daughter. Fujitaka picked up Nadeshiko's photo. He ran a finger over her angel-like face._

 _But she was far from an angel._

 _"_ _You must be so proud, Nadeshiko." He said and kissed the photo before slamming the frame face first onto the table._

 _X x x_

"Are you OK?" _He asked and place a hand on her shoulder._

Sakura nodded, although she was far from OK. There was a light breeze as they made their way towards the pickup point. Sakura looked down at her journal. It was almost blank.

What could she say? In her three hours here, she'd taken her first ever narcotics and was reconnected with her brother. She could barely remember the in-between.

And now this. She felt bitter. Her father knew. He knew Toya was alive and let her believe different. Sakura stewed in hate for the military for years, thinking they chased him off the bridge and into the river. She didn't know how to feel. Was it a betrayal? Was he just looking after her?

"Don't be angry at dad." He said, reading her thoughts. "He was right not to say anything. I wanted to bring you here for my own selfish reasons. When I first came to the west…" He trailed off, his mind flushing back to those rough, early days of western life. "…It was hard. I was an outsider for months and months. Only recently have I established myself here. In the end, I was glad you never saw a place like this. I was a stupid kid."

"He could have told me."

"You should keep this to yourself." He said. "There's no point in telling dad. Unless you want to."

Sakura didn't reply. She didn't know what she would say even if she wanted to.

"Toya, what is your objective here?"

Toya laughed. "Wow, you really do sound like a reporter."

"I'm serious. The uniform, the sneaking around, the…lies. What's it all for. What are you planning?"

Toya exhaled and looked up. With the soldiers cap on, Sakura honestly had trouble distinguishing him from the other soldiers, who never even flinched or questioned Toya. "See the walls?"

Sakura nodded. "Of course, they're always there."

"Not for long." He said, with his eyes going dark.

Sakura blinked.

"We're going to take them down. And with them, every last soldier and monarch. And with that, the regime."

Sakura swallowed. "You mean…like a revolution?"

"Yeah. Exactly."

Sakura had a hard time picturing this. The walls, they've always been here. A world without them seemed…strange. "Not all the soldiers are the same." Sakura had no idea why she said that. I came out before she could even begin to stop it. Syaoran's face flashed across her mind.

A looked of anger consumed Toya's face. "Listen to me." He said in a way that worried her. His eyes became dark and menacing. "Every last one of those soldiers will die. Do not _ever_ sympathise with them. Do you understand me?" Sakura's breath caught, she felt fear. There was a hatred seething in his voice when he spoke of the military. Sakura always spoke with distain but with Toya, it was a deep rooted hate…a vendetta almost. She knew there had to be more to this.

In seeing her panicked face Toya restrained himself. "I'm sorry. I just…you can't sympathise with them Sakura. They are evil and I will see to it, that they all are killed."

Sakura tried desperately to remain calm. The mention of military stirred his blood up so much. Images of Syaoran naked skin on her made her stomach twist in worry.

As if knowing her thoughts Toya said, "I heard that the General's son did your interview."

"Yes." Sakura said quietly. "How'd you know?"

"Word gets around." Toya nodded and narrowed his eyes. "Has he ever hurt you? Threatened you?"

Sakura shook her head. "No."

"Good. I thought they'd harass you because of me. You tell me if he ever does. He's been poking his nose around the West lately. I'd put him down if he weren't the General's son. We don't have the man power for that retaliation yet."

Sakura's heart was beating rapidly. Her palms were sweating so much.

"I've barely seen him since. I've forgotten about him."

Toya nodded then smiled. "Good. Wouldn't want you associated with someone like that."

They arrived at the pickup point.

"Toya, will I see you again? When I come back next can we-"

"Of course." He said and hugged her again. "We're reunited now. Your brother is going to protect you now."

Sakura felt relief. She had been fighting by herself so long. To have the comfort of Toya looking out for her again…she didn't feel so alone anymore.

She was silent the whole way home.

 _'_ _I'd put him down if he weren't the General's son.'_

Sakura gripped her knees. Toya was alive, and he was determined to kill them all. Especially Syaoran. Sakura gulped. She shouldn't care. But she does. She didn't want Syaoran hurt. She was in a dilemma.

She bit her lip. She closed her eyes and pictured his face, his kisses, his touch…

She had to end.

For her sake, and his…

X x x

Eriol heard Ruby laugh about something Madison said.

They were sitting on the porch playing Paka Paka all evening. The daylight hours were shrinking and bringing night with it quicker.

Now that Toya had brought Sakura into Western affairs he felt edgy. He liked Sakura. She has no nonsense about her. That was something he admired. But he struggled to see how she was related to Toya. She did not display the same arrogance he had.

Again, there was laughter from the porch.

The doorbell rang much to Eriol's surprise. The laughter outside ceased all at once.

Eriol edged his way to the front door. It was too late for any work-related visitors. Eriol was surprised to see a short stocky man dressed with a lavish red overcoat with a ridiculous number of golden buttons. Behind him stood two tall soldiers.

They were not military, no. They were Northern security. Eriol's hear beat faster as he tried understand why Monarch representatives were at his door.

"Can I help you?" Eriol asked in a weary voice.

The small man cleared his throat.

"Are you the master of this house?" His voice was higher than Eriol expected it to be.

Eriol raised an eyebrow. "Um, yes?"

"You are Mr. Hiirigazawa Eriol or West Tomoeda Spinel village?"

Again, Eriol nodded, having trouble understanding his thick Northern accent.

"Then on behalf of Clow Reed Enterprise I wish to grant you both permission and funding for the new hospital which will be located within the north-west of Western Tomoeda and appropriately named 'West Yoshiyuki Terada General hospital', in respect for its patriot, well…Yoshiyuki Terada of course."

Eriol stood baffled at the words from the little man.

"Eriol?" Ruby said coming up beside him and showing the same surprise at the men at their front door. "What's going on?"

Eriol was still too in shock to reply to her.

"Are you Mrs Hiirigazawa Ruby?" He asked turning his attention to her.

"I-I am."

"Then I believe this is for you." He said taking a large box from one of the soldier's hand and handing it to Eriol. "As you requested, your wife's medication along with vitamins and supplements, free of charge along with a monthly visit to the hospital within the Northern walls. All, of course, covered by Mr Yoshiyuki Terada.

Ruby's eyes expanded. She thought that this surly must be a dream.

"But…why? If you don't mind me asking, sir."

"My employer is inclined to give to charity every now and then. He is a generous man."

"But why us? Why me?" Ruby asked still baffled.

"Well, you did write this letter, didn't you sir?" He asked producing a letter from his breast pocket. Eriol examined it and recognized Madison's eloquent handwriting. It was the letter they sent back weeks ago. He had actually given up on this. He never thought it would come to anything.

Ruby was going to say she never knew of such letter before Eriol cut her off.

"Yes, it's mine. I wrote it. But…why now?"

Ruby raised an eyebrow at her husband's strange behaviour, but didn't dare question it.

"Well, Mr Yoshiyuki was passionately swayed to your plight. Also, this new article eh… _Western Wonders_ I believe it is. It put some spotlight on this lovely little section of Tomoeda. No harm in investing into it. Construction of the hospital shall begin within the next month. We'll be in contact."

He turned his heel quickly to leave before Eriol stopped him.

"Wait, thank you." He said and felt relief crash all over him.

"It is Mr Yoshiyuki you should thank. And you will, next month at the Tomoedan Peace ball taking place in the palace next month."

"W-what?" Ruby said, feeling her knees give way.

"Oh yes, Mr Yoshiyuki will be financing the hospital from his own pocket. And as gratitude, you are summoned to make an appearance at the ball to thank him personally and speak about the generosity of the North. A five minute speech ought to do it."

There it was, the downside. There was always a catch.

"If you have a problem, Mr Hiirigazawa, I shall inform Mr Yoshiyuki and cancel all plans and your wife's prescription-"

"No, no…I'll be there." He said through gritted teeth.

"And your wife. We expect you both." He left and entered a sleek silver car.

For now, Eriol had to push back thoughts of bowing down to the Monarch. The humiliation of which, would not sit well with him.

He caught Ruby's eye and she threw her arms around his neck and squeezed as hard as she could. She felt as if a battle was just won.

"B-but Eriol. How…I mean how did you do this? I didn't know you could write in Northern English." She said beaming, unable to believe her husband's brilliance.

"What's happened?" Madison asked coming into the living room.

"Eriol's just done the impossible." She squealed and clapped her hands together.

"Oh yeah?" She said raising an eye at him and pouring herself a glass of ice tea.

"Actually, Ruby," He said and rubbed her arm. "This was all Madison. She, she wrote the letter for me, for us. It's thanks to her."

Ruby's bright smile seemed to dull ever so slightly as she turned to look at Madison. At first, Tomoyo thought she turn her affection on Tomoyo and shower her with praise. But instead, her head twitched as she said, "When was that?"

The joyous tone of the room felt stagnant at that moment.

Tomoyo stuttered to answer.

"A few weeks ago." Eriol answered and tried to recover the mood but Ruby's smile became tight. She tried to laugh it off, but the smile didn't touch her eyes. "Why didn't you tell me you two were working on it together? Why the big secret?" Her tone was falsely light, trying not to sound accusative, and failing.

Tomoyo felt that strange pang of jealousy emitting from Ruby. It was happening a lot lately, hence why Tomoyo kept a good distance from Eriol.

"Ruby," He said calmly and placed a hand delicately on her shoulder. "Look, it was done weeks ago. I forgot all about it. I didn't think it would amount to anything that's why I didn't bother tell you-"

"So how many other times do you two meet up to discuss things?" She asking in a biting tone with that false smile threatening to break on her lips.

Tomoyo's jaw dropped. That was the closest Ruby has ever come to full on accusation. It boiled Tomoyo's blood. For once, Tomoyo was being a good girl and staying out of affairs but getting accused anyway.

Eriol ran a hand through his hair. Tomoyo could tell he was getting more frustrated. Tomoyo was caught between the awkwardness of being involved with marital matters, and anger at the accusation.

"Ruby," He said with an annoyed undertone. "Are you seriously focusing on that when we just gotten the best news in years! I've been trying to get a fraction of this for years. It took Madison _one letter_ to get us more than we need for now!"

"I don't need _her_ to do anything for me!" She said stabbing a finger at Madison. "And I don't like my husband spending intimate alone time with the maid!"

The atmosphere had dropped dramatically.

Tomoyo barked a laugh. "Oh, so now I'm _the maid._ "

"Yes, you are! That's all you are so you should stop getting involved with things that don't concern you."

"Have you fucking lost it?" Tomoyo retorted and placed her hands on her hips. "I've have done _nothing_ but be by your side or slaving away in the fields. Do you really think I have time to have an affair with your husband?" She said practically laughing.

Ruby stuttered. "I didn't say that! It's just you're _always_ here-"

"OK, hold up." She said raising a palm to her face. " _You_ were the one begging me to practically move in, _you_ were the one asking me to cut my hours in the fields so actually, _you_ are the one who wants me around the whole time!"

"You think you're great, don't you? You think you're great for taking care of the cripple-"

"Oh, God cut the shit already!"

"OK, I think we need to calm down." Eriol intervened.

"No, shut up!" Tomoyo said briefly directing her attention towards him. "If you want to stand around and take this like a little pussy, then you do that. But I'm not going to stand here and be accused."

Eriol silenced himself. He had been on war territory with bullets skimming over his head before, but he would take that over feuding women. Realistically Tomoyo was not surprised. This weird tension has been bubbling in Ruby over the past few weeks. If Eriol so much as breathed in her direction, Ruby's fists twitched. At the same time, she wanted Madison by her side to ease the loneliness. Tomoyo was fed up. Something was gonna give.

Tomoyo walked towards Ruby. "Why don't you just come out with it. Why don't just say what you're thinking?"

Ruby narrowed her eyes but locked her jaw.

"Fine. Well let me say this. I am _not_ sleeping with your husband. There. It's out. Are you happy now?"

"It still doesn't excuse you getting involved with my life. My medical conditions are for me to deal with. Me, alone, not you!"

"Really? Cause it seems your husband has been doing all of that."

With that comment Ruby snapped her mouth closed. Tomoyo knew she'd hit a sore spot. Tomoyo wasn't willing to stay to hear her rebuttal. She was done. She grabbed her coat and didn't even look at Eriol on her way out.

She was so done with Ruby and her allegations. Especially when Tomoyo was doing everything to remain on her best behaviour. No more. Her loyalty to Ruby had shattered.

"Oh, and don't worry about me being _involved_ anymore. I quit." She said and slammed the door behind her.

Neither Ruby or Eriol said anything for a while. He was restraining his own anger. How could she think like that? Why does she think like that? All he has been doing was pushing and pushing to keep and flow of medication for her coming through.

"Aren't you going to go after her?" She spat.

Eriol snapped his head up. "Are you actually serious?" He said incredulously. "You actually think I'm sleeping with her?"

"I see you looking at her! Those meds knock me out who knows what you're doing while I'm asleep! And you're always coming home late-"

"Fuck sake, Ruby!" He shouted. "What have I ever done to make you think this way? I have stayed faithful to you despite everything-"

"You mean despite my illness? Despite having the shame of being married to a weak, helpless-"

"No, despite being accused time and time again of the same thing. It was the same with Brenda, with Lucy, with Yuki and the others. Every single woman who comes into this house, you think I'm screwing. I am sick of having the same argument with you!" He let out a frustrated groan. He should have known this was going to happen.

As sweet and innocent as Ruby was her jealousy always came back to accuse him. "I can't take this anymore Ruby. I'm slaving away day and night trying to keep Toya and my mother from starting a war, keep food coming into the West-"

"Yes, Eriol I realize that! You're out all day and I just sit here! All I had was Madison-"

"Yes, and pushed her away too."

Silence fell.

"Can't you just be happy for now?" He begged. "Look, Ruby you know how much we needed this medicine. Does it really matter how we got it?"

"I'm not accepting her help." She said stiffly and crossed her arms. "You can send it all back to the North. We don't need their charity."

Eriol was stunned. He could only shake his head. He felt that last care he had evaporate as he grabbed his coat and made his way towards the door. He was tired. He was done.

"Where are you going?" She asked angrily following him.

He didn't answer. He stalked off into the darkness.

When she couldn't hear his footsteps anymore, Ruby used the last of her strength and kicked the box of meds onto the floor. She knew she was not in her right mind. Her husband was not having an affair. She knew this.

But she didn't like the thoughts of him being grateful to Madison. To beautiful, do-no-wrong Madison.

X x x

The journey from the West to the East was a tiring one.

After getting three body searches and a rather uncomfortable pat down by a rough female soldier, Sakura was finally released. But not, of course without the contents of her notebook being examined thoroughly.

Sakura's feet felt heavy as she walked from the train station to her house.

Syaoran was not there to meet her when she left the walls. Of course, he wasn't. Why would he be? An even bigger question was, why did she care? She shook her head. She had to stop lying to herself. She knew why she cared. She missed him. The gravity of their last conversation was weighing heavily on her. She regretted pushing him.

The street was empty and tranquil. It was only ten o'clock and already everyone was in the safely and comfort of their homes. She heard a noise ahead of her and saw a movement between the streetlights. Syaoran came into view before her.

Sakura blinked twice to make sure he was really there. He was.

She squeezed the strap of her bag and took steps towards him. His face was not stony as it was the last time they spoke. It was torn, giving away a vulnerability.

"I…I tried to catch you on the way back from the West but, work held me up." He said although she wasn't going to ask.

Sakura nodded. She had wanted to see him badly, but now wasn't sure of what to say.

"Sakura, I…I think we should talk."

Sakura tried to disguise the pain she felt at that moment. She wondered if he wanted to officially break of off with him. To clear up any doubt. She heard a noise from ahead. Someone was taking out their trash.

"Not here." She whispered and walked ahead. She didn't want to risk being caught with him. Even if it was a breakup.

He followed behind her to her house and around the side gate to the back garden. The light in her father's room was off. He was probably upstairs sleeping.

Sakura's garden was not too large. It was cosy and bustling with flowers. Her father's hobby, when he had the time. They both sat on the bench. A small light lit up on the porch.

They sat with some distance between them. Sakura braced herself. No matter how hard she tried, she simply couldn't muster up the strength to be her usual hard self. Seeing Toya had sucked out any energy she had.

She wished he'd hurry up and break up with her already.

"You wanted to talk." She said quietly.

He nodded. "Yeah." He said. She wouldn't look at him. She seemed to have a vulnerability about her tonight. For a moment he was lost in taking up her features. If he kissed her then, he'd know how her lips would feel. He knew how she'd smell and the feel of her hair brushing lightly against his face.

"I've been thinking a lot about…us." He said.

Sakura nodded. She's been doing the same.

"I came to the conclusion that it's best for us not to see each other like…the way we use to."

Sakura felt her chest tighten. She bit her lip. She knew she was getting emotional. She had to get a grip.

"It makes sense to do so. We're…we're from different sides of the wall. It's just, dangerous for us to be together. That, and other things."

Sakura just nodded but kept her head down. She wanted to hit herself for tearing up. She didn't want this. When did she become so weak over a guy?

"Sakura," He whispered and brought his hand to the side of her face. When her tearing, green eyes met his he was reminded of why he was here. "I've thought this through over and over again. It's…it would be best to just stop now."

Sakura shot up and paced forward. "You're right, it would be best. Is that all?"

 _Damn it…_ She thought as her voice broke. He came up behind her and touched her wrist. She reluctantly turned to face him. Syaoran was shocked at the tears in her eyes. She was exhausted from everything that happened today. She couldn't keep her emotions in check.

"Despite the fact that it's what we _should_ do…I…I just can't stay away from you." He whispered so lowly she just about caught it.

She looked up in confusion.

"Sakura, you…you are driving me insane." He said with a small, awkward laugh. "I want to stay away but I…I miss you. I want this, us, to work."

Sakura felt her heart beat excitedly. Blood flushed to her cheeks. She couldn't understand the relief she felt, but also didn't want to question it. She smiled and put her hands to her cheeks to cool them down.

"But," He said in a sadder tone which worried her. "But Sakura, I can take all the secrets. I don't know what you're thinking or planning but, we can't go on like this. We need to trust each other."

Sakura's chest tightened. Trust. That was a thing she wanted, but was proving more difficult as the days went by. Toya's face flashed through her mind. "I understand. But how can that change?"

He sighed and rubbed his cheeks. This discussion didn't stem from nowhere. It started with his face-off with Kaho Mizuki. The way she dismissed Meiling's treatment of the cadets, their use of fire arms…and then there's Tomoyo.

"I know you don't trust me." He said. "And I can't tell you everything. But I'll tell you what I can."

"But why? Why do you trust me now?"

Syaoran took a deep breath. "Because you're right. It is wrong."

Sakura's lips formed a small 'o'.

"Some of it, anyway. The Westerners, their lives are miserable and they struggle to survive. We both know that."

Sakura felt as if she were winded. He was agreeing with her.

"But Sakura," He said in a worried voice. "You seem to hold me too responsible for this. You think I have the power to change this because I'm the general's son but I don't. I can't change anything. You can't expect me to either. No matter what, I'm still a soldier."

Sakura swallowed and nodded. "I know. I'm sorry I just…I just get wrapped up in my own head." She placed her hand on his chest to keep him there. She was afraid he'd change his mind. Sakura had trouble understanding herself. Not long ago she had convinced herself that she had to end this. That it was destined for disaster, fuelled by the revelations of Toya, who was determined to kill every soldier. Including Syaoran.

He placed his hands on her shoulders and brought her closer. She wanted to kiss him but he kept her at length.

"You're turn."

"What?"

"If we are going to work. We both have to be honest, Sakura. I need to know that you trust me."

Sakura swallowed again.

"I don't have anything to tell you."

"Why are you going into the West? I know you have no interest in promoting their interest. Don't lie." His eyes were aflame with speculation. She needed to ease that.

Sakura felt the weight of indecision. "I think there's more going on in the West then what we're told. I wanted to see for myself. That's all."

"That's all?"

"That's all." She said.

Syaoran nodded. Sakura wanted him to kiss her, to seal their rekindling but something else was on his mind. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. Sakura feared what would come next.

"I was investigating you for three months to see if you were involved in terrorist activity."

Sakura thought she misheard. But no, she didn't.

"You…what?"

"Base thought you were…involved. It was just to make sure. You're not being investigated anymore."

"And I'm supposed to feel grateful for that?" She said backing away. How quickly she went from seeing him as her lover to a hunter. The line between the two was becoming even more blurred.

"No. I'm telling you the truth Sakura. I'm not hiding it from you anymore."

Sakura rubbed her eyes. She was so tired. "Were you investigating me when we were sleeping together?"

Syaoran hesitated before answering. "The first time, yes."

"Oh my God." She mumbled into her hands. She felt like such an idiot. This whole time she thought she had avoided a majority of suspicion, when he was one step ahead of her this whole time.

"I didn't think we'd end up like this." He said defensively, trying to regain control over the conversation before he blurted out; "I didn't think I'd end up loving you."

Sakura stopped pacing. Her hands froze. The aftermath of what he just said hit him. His eyes expanded as he scrambled for an excuse.

"I mean…I…" He sighed loudly and shrugged. He, too, was also physically and mentally tired. Too tired to cover up the truth. "Yeah, I love you. I'm sorry." He said with a tight smile.

"You…love me?" She said more to herself.

It wasn't the first time a man has said that to Sakura. Yukito would say it to her as if it were going out of fashion. Many men during her University days had also confessed to her but it didn't provoke any strong reaction from her. But Syaoran…when he said it, it made her mind stall. She felt light and strange. Did she…love him back?

"It's ok." He said and dug his hands into his pocket. Sakura thought it was cute, like a schoolboy. "I know that you…don't like talking about things like this…"

"I don't." She said trying to restrain a beaming smile. Her arms threaded around his neck. "But it makes a girl feel pretty special." She said lightly which made Syaoran stutter in disbelief. He never thought such a hard woman like her would accept such a confession.

His nose tipped of her and she thought he would finally kiss her. Again, the line blurred. How Sakura's emotions flipped when it came to Syaoran Li.

"Sakura, there is one more thing." He whispered and held her back. He didn't want to do this, but he had to. He just had to.

"What's wrong?" She asked and traced a finger over his cheekbone. She wanted this aching conversation to be over. She didn't want any more 'one more things'. He was already pushing her limits.

"Sakura…" He pleased that this wouldn't pause their rekindling. "Your brother Toya. He's alive." He said bluntly. There wasn't a lighter way to put it.

Sakura felt her blood run cold. Did he already know that she met him? Was he keeping an eye on her? Is this whole conversation just a ploy to lure her?

"What?" She whispered and took a step back.

Syaoran mistook her hesitance for shock. "I know it's a lot to take in. But bear with me. We suspect that he's still alive."

"No, he died five years ago." Sakura wondered if her voice was too sterile to be believable. "He can't be…"

"I know it's hard to believe, we didn't think so until he was spotted."

Sakura stayed silent. She went numb. How could Syaoran possibly know? She had momentarily forgotten that behind the kindness of the man who just confessed his love for her, was a cunning soldier.

"Sakura, I know you don't want to hear this, but he's dangerous. He's been involved in terrorist activity and killed many innocent people. We need to find him."

"No..Toya…terrorist?"

"We think he led an assault on the King which killed over thirty people."

I didn't hear anything about that-"

"Sakura. You have to believe me. Toya, he's dangerous."

Sakura's mind raced. Syaoran's words didn't make sense. No, Toya was not a terrorist. The Toya she met today was gentle, caring like he always was with her. Syaoran couldn't be telling the truth.

"Sakura this is important and I'm only going to ask you this once. Whatever answer you tell me, I will believe and I won't ever ask you again. No harm will come to you." He was deadly serious now. Sakura's hands began to shake. "Be honest with me. I'll trust you."

"A friend of mine is in danger. Someone very close to me. If we find Toya, we can save them and dozens, maybe hundreds of others. This is serious. I have to know."

Sakura gulped, Syaoran saw the hesitance in her eyes. "OK."

"Do you, or did you have any contact with Toya?"

Sakura felt torn. This couldn't be happening…Syaoran was after her brother. He was looking at her dead in the eye. Sakura wondered if he'd easily see through a lie.

"What are you going to do to him?" She whispered.

"I have to arrest him, Sakura. And he has to face up to his crimes."

 _No_ , Sakura thought. _Syaoran might only arrest him, but the military will kill him._

Sakura felt sick. Toya was determined to kill Syaoran at all costs, and Syaoran was determined to kill Toya. Her brother and her lover. Syaoran was being open to her now. He just wanted this one piece of honesty from her. Toya couldn't be a terrorist…no.

But he spoke of war, she reminded herself. How much did he mean that? He wasn't serious about a revolution, was he? She had barely scratched the surface with Toya. What Syaoran was saying…it couldn't be true? Could it?

She looked into Syaoran's eyes. This was important to him.

But she'd be damned, if she would ever rat out her family.

With great effort and pain, she shook her head. "No, I haven't seen him in five years."

Syaoran's eyes sunk in disappointment.

"OK, I believe you. But if I find him Sakura, I will have to arrest him. Can you still be with me knowing that?"

 _You won't find him._ She thought. _If it kills me, you will never find him. And I'll keep you close, Syaoran, to make sure that won't happen. I'm sorry, but I can't be honest with you for now…_

"You said he's a danger." She said. "Do what you have to do."

He embraced her tightly and they kissed softly at first and then passionately. It felt so wrong to kiss him back. How could this be when moments ago she felt elated. She shouldn't want this. He wants to get Toya. But she does want this. For now, she just wanted Syaoran, and to ignore the dilemma's of the real world.

"I won't say it again, because I know it weirds you out but..." He whispered. "I really, really, _really_ like you." She could feel the smile on his lips.

She smirked. "I know, you told me."

"Still too proud to say it back?"

"You know me so well."

As they kissed neither of them heard the light footsteps coming down the stairs from inside the house. Fujitaka didn't sleep well knowing Sakura still wasn't home. He tossed and turned until he thought he heard noises, then he lay still and listened.

Definitely noises, coming from the garden.

He rubbed his eyes and opened Sakura's bedroom door. Empty. She should be home by now.

The stairs didn't creak as he descended them.

He was about to turn on the kitchen light when his eye caught two silhouettes in the garden. He walked closer to the window and peered out.

What he saw made his stomach twist in disbelief.

His daughter's arms were wrapped around a soldier. Not just any soldier. The General's son. He watched as Syaoran held her tightly by the small of her back, planting small kissed on her lips between words. He looked on in shock as his daughter tilted her head back with a glorious beaming smile. He has not seen her smile like that in years.

His daughter and a soldier.

He never thought such a thing would ever happen.

Fujitaka backed from the window silently and retreated upstairs.

He rubbed his forehead.

This worried him. No- It frightened him.

He thought he was beginning to understand his daughter.

But he didn't understand her.

He didn't understand her at all.

X x x

Tomoyo felt his eyes on her all night.

It thrilled her and scared her at the same time. All around her people were lively and singing to relieve the stress of a week's work. Tomoyo took a sip of her drink and laughed at something the man beside her was saying. He was twice her age and a widower with two missing front teeth but that didn't stop him trying to woo her. She responded just to tease but also because she knew Eriol was watching.

Just as he watched her flirt shamelessly with many men at the bar.

She was surprised to see him here. He must have had another fight with Ruby. Did he come here to drown his sorrows? To release some steam? To be alone? Or for her? Tomoyo didn't know. One thing she did know, her loyalty to Ruby had taken a nosedive.

Tomoyo felt a hand on her waist. One of her field colleagues, who was young and also making attempts for her affection was looking at her with his young innocent eyes. Tomoyo smiled flirtatiously, placed her hands on his chest and whispered into his ear.

Eriol's hand gripped the glass tighter. He thought he'd crush it. As she whispered into his ear her eyes flickered to his, she smiled, wickedly.

Eriol felt rage boil inside him. She was teasing him, pushing him to do something, but he was rooted to his chair. He glared at his wedding ring. Ruby was driving him crazy. She was becoming something he'd never seen before. And Madison was driving him over the edge.

He couldn't understand how his mind flicked back and forth. From annoyance at her self-righteousness, to the longing to have her, to nothing but utter admiration of the woman that she was. And today was yet another example of admiration. A year's supply of medicine, a new hospital which would create employment for hundreds, all achieved in a short letter. And Ruby had dismissed it so easily over nothing. Nothing, yet it was infuriating. Eriol didn't know where to turn. Who would listen to him? Everyone thought the world of poor Ruby. Eriol had no good reason to complain about his wife over some beers like his friends often did.

But Madison…she was a woman like he's never seen in the West before.

He longed for her. He couldn't deny it any longer. She infuriated him with her taunting, flirting with other men. Before today's incident with Ruby, she kept herself at a frustrating distance. Not too close to be in the danger zone, but not too far not to dangle temptation in front of him. But now, it was obvious. She wasn't hiding it anymore. But she wanted him to break first.

She threw her head back and laughed at something the boy said and he grinned, happy with himself.

Eriol exhaled furiously.

He grabbed his coat and left. He couldn't do this anymore. He was chasing something he could never have. Because he was a loyal husband. Or was he? He didn't know anymore.

The cool air was relieving. He didn't know what to do now.

"Leaving so soon?"

Eriol froze.

Tomoyo stood leaning against the pillar and looking at him.

"I guess so. You seem to be enjoying yourself." He said angrier than he ever intended it to be. This was unhealthy. Maybe it was good that she quit. It would give him breathing space to remove her from his mind, to cease his hands longing to touch her.

"Oh? Jealous?" She smirked and chuckled darkly.

Eriol didn't respond. This was a dangerous conversation.

"Don't be." She said and played with her hair. "I'm not interested in those boys." She looked him up and down and smirked. "But I'm more than flattered you've been watching me so closely."

Eriol stalked off. He wouldn't listen to her anymore.

"I'll walk you home." She said catching up to him.

When they had reached the front of his house. He walked towards the porch and stopped, unable to go any further. All the lights in the house were off, Ruby was asleep.

"What's wrong?" Tomoyo asked. "Aren't you going to kiss you wife goodnight?" Her voice was powdered with venom.

Eriol balled his fists. He looked at her incredulously. She didn't budge. Her face was stony, her blue eyes daring him to go into the house, to get into the same bed as Ruby. Eriol feet manoeuvred towards the back of the house. He needed to be away from women. All sorts of explicit things were going through his mind and Madison was only encouraging it. He couldn't lie next to Ruby, not after what happened today.

He threw open the door of the shed and went inside. He waited to hear the bang of the door closing but it was delayed. Swerving his head around, his heart ponded when he saw Madison standing in the doorway.

She didn't say anything, but her eyes betrayed her objective.

Eriol swallowed. He should have asked her to leave. It was completely inappropriate for her to be here. But his mouth stayed shut. Tomoyo knew she had her hold over him. He was not getting away from her, even if he wanted to.

The door closed softly behind her.

Only small silver rays of moonlight provided some light in the dimly lit barn. Tomoyo felt the hay rustle beneath her feet as she approached him in slow, seductive steps.

Only when she was a few feet in front of her did Eriol begin to react. He took a step back but was met immediately by the back wall. She had him cornered like a predator to its prey. Eriol still said nothing. His mind was conflicted. His heart beat faster with what he was ashamed to call, excitement.

She closed in.

Tomoyo's hand rested on the wall beside him. There was a gap for him to escape. He could easily maneuverer her out of the way, but he stayed perfectly where he was.

Tomoyo tilted her head to the side and cast her icy blue eyes on him.

Eriol's palms began to sweat and he felt a stiffness in his trousers already but she is calm and collected and intimidating in a way that excites him.

He has never met a woman like Tomoyo.

"Madison…" He managed to whisper and she let that name fade into nowhere.

A small smile crept on her lips with the hint of longing in his voice.

"I'm tired of ignoring this." She said in a low voice that gave him chills.

"Of what?" He answered, his ignorance makes her eyes narrow.

"You're going to make me say it? Are you?" She leaned in and he could smell her. It was driving him crazy. There was no more room for him to retreat backwards.

Eriol remained silent, retraining himself from grabbing her there and then.

Tomoyo smirked. He was going to play it that way. She leaned in and bringing her lips to his ear she whispered; "I want you to throw me onto the hay over there, and fuck me until I can't move anymore."

Eriol was hard now, against his better judgment.

She pulled away to look at his face. "Is that what you want?" She asked, bringing her lips inches from him.

Eriol has never had to show such great restraint like this before. Her smell, her lips, her words…everything was driving him insane. He would. He couldn't remember the last time he was so aroused. He would take her there and then and do all sorts of things he could never do with Ruby but…

That was the thing…Ruby.

Thoughts of his wife sleeping in their house a mere three minutes away paralysed him from answering Tomoyo. Tomoyo waited. She would not make the first move. No, it couldn't be her. He was the married one, he would carry the most guilt. Tomoyo would not be caught with the accusation that she started it first.

A minute passed and Eriol said nothing.

Tomoyo's eyes narrowed cat-like.

"If you don't want to fuck me. Then just tell me to leave." She said with daring eyes. "Tell me to leave, and I will. But…" She looked him intensely. "If you tell me to leave, then I won't come back. I'll leave this village and you won't see me again."

Eriol thought it was a bluff but her expression was deadly serious.

"I don't believe you."

"What the hell would keep me here? Your wife already thinks low of me. I'm very popular Eriol. You know it won't be long before I find someone else who will do what you won't."

Eriol smirked, "Of course you will, but you won't do that. You won't see any fun in that."

"Then tell me to leave." She dared, again.

They were so close now; the smallest movement and they'd be touching. She was begging him to close the gap, and he was aching to. Tomoyo began to feel a small tinge of doubt. Maybe Eriol Hiirigazawa was too good of a man to fall for her tricks.

She began to withdraw from him.

He grabbed her wrist.

Or maybe he wasn't.

Tomoyo felt the crushing weight of his lips on her followed quickly by hands all over her. When her thoughts came together she kissed him back just as hungrily. He swooped her up easily and she tangled her legs around his waist, excited about the throbbing in his groin. It made her wetter for him.

He threw her down onto the bed of hay. Tomoyo barely got her breath back before he was on top of her. She revealed in his attention and wasted no time with undressing him.

He took her with an animalistic hunger that was half lust, half violent. When her entered her, she needed a moment to get her breath back. She could feel his sexual depravity as his jagged, uneven thrusts settled in to hard powerful thrusts, each one causing her pain and pleasure.

He wanted to kiss her and touch her everywhere possible. She revealed with the feeling of his hot breath in her ear. His groans were sending electricity through her body. Only in the last few thrusts before they climaxed, almost too quickly, did she hear the one thing she didn't want to.

"Madison…" He moaned and shuddered inside her before collapsing on top of her.

His huge muscular body was limp in her arms and Tomoyo caressed it like ivy around a pillar.

She ran a hand through his thick, dark hair and kissed the top of his head.

With each small kiss she tried to drive away the feelings of guilt and uncertainty that would come to him in the morning.

 _Fuck it,_ she thought for now. _You, Eriol Hiirigazawa, were with the worth…_

X x x

 **Thank you for reading!**

 **:)**


	17. Out for Blood

**Hello again!**

 **Sorry about the long break between chapters here! I've been studying for an important exam and had no time or concentration to write. Anyway, the exam is finally over (it went terribly but oh well at least I have my life back!).**

 **Thanks for all the reviews, they really help me see where I need to tweak things! I apologise that I was laying on the 'Tomoyo/Syaoran' plot, that was not my intention at all. I never actually realize how much emphasise I was putting on it. Believe me, this is definitely not a TomoyoxSyaoran fanfic! I hope I've corrected it some in this chapter and the next, I may go back and do some editing in regards to that sub plot too!**

 **Anyways, hope you enjoy this chapter and keep reading. :)**

 **x x x**

Eriol sat upright deep in contemplation.

The expression on his face worried Tomoyo. She froze in her nakedness under the thin sheet, suddenly feeling exposed and vulnerable. She never thought, as they slept soundly through the night that dawn would shine such a harsh light on their shameful deed.

She watched his naked back breath in and out, betraying no fear or complacent-ness. He was a stone wall at the moment.

Unable to sit in silence a moment longer, she pushed through the fear of rejection and touched his shoulder with her bare fingertips. He flinched. She began to retract her hand but he grabbed it and brought Tomoyo's arm around to his chest. Her wrist was warm in his hand. When he brought his nose to her skin and inhaled, she breathed a silent sigh of relief.

"This shouldn't happen again." He mumbled into her skin.

He could feel her head nod against his back. He didn't say 'won't happen'. He said 'shouldn't'.

Eriol's eyes flickered towards the small window. His mind struggled to let go of the memories of the most passionate night he had since his wedding night. Tomoyo wrapped her arms around his neck and rested her head against his shoulder blades.

 _This is so wrong._ She thought. _So wrong to feel this way._

"Are you going to tell Ruby?" She whispered, almost hoping he didn't hear. She didn't want to know the answer.

Eriol didn't answer straight away. He had been mulling that question over and over since he woke up. The guilt was wracking him up inside. A good husband would push Tomoyo away from him, tell Ruby everything and beg for forgiveness and make passionate promises about spending the rest of his life making it up to his wife.

He sighed.

No matter how many times he thought about telling Ruby, all the different reactions she could have… Tears, screams…illness…one thing remained constant.

Ruby would never leave him.

It wasn't cockiness or overconfidence. It just was how it was. Ruby needed him, in more ways than just a husband. She came from a poor family in a village high up in the mountains. His family practically begging his to wed them. And he said yes.

 _It will create good ties with her village, it's admirable, Eriol. It will be good for us all._ Said his mother.

Like a fool, Eriol did what his mother thought was right at the time. Like he always did.

But Ruby was beautiful. _Is_ beautiful. He was young, only seventeen. He was a lad who only thought about getting off from work and drinking with his friends, being carefree like most boys his age.

But Ruby was beautiful and charming. It wasn't hard to fall for her. But marriage, that came too quick. The pressure was from all sides. His mother, Ruby's mother and, of course, Ruby. Such urgency that he didn't understand at the time. Why did they have to get married so young? They had only been dating three months.

Then they got married, and he understood exactly why.

Eriol never knew she was sick. Or at least _how._

It was only the day after they got married that her father signed over Ruby's medical bills.

 _It's only a cough_ Ruby would say before marriage. _I'll be over it in no tim_ e. _It's nothing to worry about_.

His mother didn't take it well and fought tooth and nail to have the marriage annulled and almost did, until Eriol stopped her. He did care about her, it wasn't her fault she was so sick…but the lie…

In the end, perhaps he married her out of pity.

He changed. He had to. He could no longer be a young lad anymore. He was now a married man with a sick wife. His days of gallivanting had come to a very sharp stop. So, he worked harder than every villager to afford to take care of Ruby. And he made himself love her.

He _did_ love her. They had survived seven years of marriage. He made a comfortable home for her, loved her. He couldn't give her children but he'd give her what he could. He thought there was nothing else to experience…

Then he met Tomoyo. He wondered why he had never experienced the almost child like obsession and feelings for her, but not quite to that intensity with Ruby. With Ruby it was linear. Marriage, home kids…well, almost linear. But with Tomoyo it wasn't linear. It was bursts of excitement, unpredictability. Or perhaps, that was just the affair trying to hush away the guilt.

Either way, without Eriol, Ruby could not survive.

Ruby knew this. She would stay with him, no matter what. For that reason alone, he wouldn't tell her what he did. Because it would be unnecessary pain. They'd have to live together, put on a smile and charade in public. Why make it harder for her?

No, he'd keep this to himself.

He shifted, which made Tomoyo move her head. He lifted her chin with his finger and looked into her steely blue eyes. They held vulnerability, awaiting his reaction. He surprised them both when he kissed her very softly.

Slowly he rose to his feet, leaving a cold space in his absence.

Had he not kissed her, she would have assumed he was done with her. Now, now she didn't know. They dressed themselves in silence.

"You should leave first." She said softly.

When he did, she felt her chest tighten with guilt and longing.

Maybe it was for the best.

She didn't deserve a man like him.

X x x

Fujitaka stood at the doorway of his kitchen.

He felt a heavy weight in his heart as he watched his daughter mill around the kitchen with a small infectious smile on her lips. She seemed lighter, breezier in the past few days. Fujitaka even thought he had heard her humming yesterday. He nearly keeled over at her drastically different personality.

 _She's in love,_ he thought.

And although it warmed his heart dearly to see Sakura so happy, happier than she had even been in the past few years, it also brought to the surface, fears he never thought he'd have to worry about.

A soldier.

Not any soldier. The General's son.

Fujitaka hadn't slept right since the night he stumble upon their intimate embrace. He never told her that he knew. Even if he did, what could he say? That he disapproves? That she should end this? No. He couldn't. That would only bring about more questions. And he didn't want anything to re-open his past.

But it worried him. She was too close to the military now. Going from despising the military, hungry for justice to working _for_ them, and loving one of them. Sakura was changing. He didn't like it. Not at all. He saw less of her brooding in deep thought, or with her nose in a book.

"Dad?" She said, finally noticing him at the door.

Fujitaka snapped out of his worried thoughts.

"Good morning." He said lightly and sat down at the table with his newspaper. "I read your new article. Half a page. They seem to really like your work." He said with a smile.

"Oh, yeah." She said in a falling tone. "I guess so." She mumbled.

Sakura was not too thrilled about the second article. They edited a lot too. Yue had warned her this time to not be so obvious with her distain about Western life. She had to monitor herself more. She'd go back in next week. She smiled, she could see Toya again.

And tonight, she would see Syaoran.

Her smile widened.

"Sakura," Fujitaka said, catching her smiling to herself. "What are your plans today?"

"Rika and I are going for lunch." She said.

"Oh, that's nice. Anything…else?" He said trying to keep neutral.

Sakura paused her hands over her plate and looked at him with brief confusion. "Um…no dad. I'm not that popular." She said with ease.

His daughter had become so good at lying. It broke his heart that she was keeping secrets from him. He thought that they were closer than this. He sighed.

"I'm working late tonight." He said. "I'll be back around eleven."

"Ok." She said, her mind already floating towards other things. Fujitaka wondered if she were thinking of the Colonel Lieutenant.

"I better go." She said swooping up her cutlery and washing them quickly.

"Sakura," He said, catching her before she disappeared out the door.

"Yeah?"

Fujitaka hesitated. "You know…you can tell me anything, right?"

Sakura stiffened. It wasn't like him to be anything but light. There was something off here. She took a step back and faced him. She wondered if he knew. Did he know she had spoken to Toya? Was he going to own up to it?

"Of course, dad. Is something wrong?"

Fujitaka wished he could rewind time to when she was just a child. When he knew everything that was happening and could protect her. Everything was changing so quickly. He couldn't do anything to stop it.

"…No. Nothing. Just thought I'd let you know." He said and returned to his paper. She left and upon hearing the door close she sighed.

Nadeshiko's picture faced him. He rested his head on his fist and wondered what she would say about all of this.

A lot more than Fujitaka would, anyway.

X x x

In her whole life, Princess Tomoyo had never been plague by the emotion of guilt.

She had had her way with many men in the past. Married or otherwise. It usually was followed by a small lull of emptiness, but it passed as quickly as it came and she would move onto the next. There was a cheap thrill that came with seducing men simply because she can.

But after a single night with Eriol Hiirigazawa, that changed.

Guilt did not sit well with her. She wanted to feel the emptiness she once felt after such endeavours. She saw it in his eyes too.

 _What have we done?_

But when the guilty feelings subdued themselves for even a second, her thought were on Eriol. His touch, his kiss, the way he breathed in is sleep in slow, deep breaths.

It was torture.

She was frustrated with herself for even thinking like this. It was like her old self was slipping from her grasp. The Princess of the North was but a distant memory and with it, she took the sharpness, the irreverent that Tomoyo relied on to get through life. She was getting soft. It scared her.

Now that she had quit as Ruby's maid, she was working fulltime on the fields. The work was hard, but she appreciated it as a distraction. She was offered a promotion, which she politely declined. The last thing she needed was to be noticed more.

That is until she ran into Eriol, which happened on too many occasions. It couldn't be avoided, they lived in the same village. Yet every time they met her fingers began the slightest tremble. Nervousness would work its way into her voice when she had to speak to him. Her wit and flirtation failed her.

Who was she anymore?

She sighed and placed a hand on her back. It was only midday, yet everyone was working tirelessly to keep up with demands of the South. The cold wind wisped through her hair. Taking off her gloves she looked at her hands.

The scars across her palms from her early work days had long healed. Her hands became rough and callous from long days of work. They constantly smelled like Mirth. She loved it. She adored the sounds of western chatter, the warmth of the local bar after a hard days' work. It was hard to believe that these hands used to be so soft and delicate and only knew the feel of fine things. Her porcelain skin had tanned under the harsh, Western sun. Her hair, which was once admired and awed by family and close friends, was now growing in thick, uneven clunks. She sighed. Queen Sonomi would not even recognize her if she stood in front of her.

Tomoyo was pulled by another emotion.

Homesickness.

But homesickness for what? Being a princess? Being locked up? Forced to go to events?

No. She didn't miss any of that.

But did she honestly plan to stay forever? Could she even do that? Was that what she wanted?

But she missed her mother, and felt a terrible regret over vanishing from her life like that. Tomoyo had not yet seriously thought of the future. How could she even explain herself if she returned home?

Tomoyo realized that perhaps she wasn't homesick. Maybe she was just experiencing more guilt.

Guilt upon guilt.

She shook her head. No time to think about such things now. She walked back to the dorms which she had to re-acquaint herself with after her impromptu retirement from maid life. She was quick to appreciate the personal space and comfortable mattress that came with living with Ruby. She sighed. She missed Ruby, but she was glad to be out of there.

Speaking of the devil, Tomoyo looked up and saw Ruby perched on a stump watching the fields with no particular interest. Tomoyo froze for a second. The sickening guilt of her deeds rose in her throat. She wanted to hold her head highly and arrogantly. But the weight of her guilt kept her shoulders slumped. As if sensing this, Ruby looked up and caught her eye. Tomoyo was surprised when Ruby's broke into a wide smile.

"I've been waiting for you." She said with a wide smile but weak voice as she sprang over to Tomoyo. Tomoyo swallowed hard and clutched her bag. She felt so awkward after their last encounter.

Ruby shuffled on the spot and hesitated to say something.

"I'm sorry, Madison."

Tomoyo stood stunned and confused.

"You're…what?"

"Hear me out," Ruby said and took her hand. "Things are stressful at home. I was annoyed with myself, not you. The things I said to you and accused you of…I'm so sorry. I...I'm so ashamed. It was only after you left that I realized how crazy I was being!" She smiled awkwardly to try make light of it.

Tomoyo bit back from saying anything.

 _No, you're wrong. I am everything you said I was._ She thought. Tomoyo couldn't bring herself to say this, so she close silence, like a coward.

"Please come back." She blurted.

"No." Tomoyo answered and pushed past her. Her hands were shaking. If only Ruby knew what she did…

"Wait? Why not? You're still angry? Madison I'm sorry I know it was my fault-"

"It's not that. It's just…"

"What then?" Ruby asked. "Madison, we had a fight. That's what happens between friends sometimes."

Tomoyo gritted her teeth and focused on containing the swelling in her chest. Tomoyo was no friend.

"Come on, I miss you. I'm not strong enough to go through twenty other maids. You're not going to say no to a sick person, are you?" She teased.

"I'll think about it." Tomoyo mumbled, already knowing that she could never do such a thing. She couldn't go back to the Hiirigazawa house.

"Good." Ruby said before smiling awkwardly and picking up her basket. "Because we need you." She said brightly.

Something about that statement threw Tomoyo off.

 _We_ need you…?

X x x

"You seem…different."

Sakura sipped her tea and waited for Rika to elaborate.

"You seem...happy." She said.

"It's different for me to be happy?" Sakura asked.

Rika put the menu down and flicked her hair back. She looked good. It was the first time in a long time she had the whole weekend off. It was rare. It was even rarer that her friend Sakura would join her.

"Oh, you know what I mean." She said and nudged her. "You're usually brooding or thinking about how much you hate everything."

"I do not brood." She said defensively followed by a light laugh.

"The point is, you're happy. I hope it lasts. He must be a miracle worker."

"Who is?"

"The mystery man you're obviously seeing. Whichever one he is."

"What does that mean?"

Rika grinned at her. "Well it has to either be that dashing, enigmatic boss of yours or the God-like Colonel Lieutenant."

"Will you keep your voice down, and your theories to yourself." She whispered and glanced around to see if anyone had heard.

"Ugh, you're paranoid."

Sakura rolled her eyes and looked out the window. Easterners going about their usual day.

"Excuse me?" Rika and Sakura looked up to see a woman in her late 40's standing over their table. "Are you Ms Kinomoto Sakura?"

Sakura nodded, feeling suspicion growing inside her.

"As in, _the_ Kinomoto Sakura who write the _'Western Wonders'_ for the Tomoedan Mirror?"

Sakura went to say no. She didn't want the attention.

"Yes, ma'am." Rika beamed. "This is her."

"Oh, wonderful! I just want to say I think you are doing a terrific job for Tomoeda and Utopia. Keep up the good work." She said and Sakura mumbled and embarrassed 'thanks'.

Sakura was mortified because now other people were looking at her. This was happening over the last three weeks. Some people have even stopped her in the street to congratulate her. She didn't like it. She didn't want to know that she was _helping_ the government. The thoughts of her being a propaganda tool for Base made her feel extremely uneasy. But she was in too deep now. If she backed out now, that was it for seeing Toya again.

"Wow, you're a regular celebrity now, huh?" Rika said. "Keep it up and you might even get an invite to the Palace next week."

"What? Why? What's next week?"

Rika's smile dropped and she settled her cup back onto its saucer.

"Are you serious? You don't know about the Tomoedan Peace ball? It happens like, every year. How can you not know about it?"

Sakura sucked on the straw and just shrugged.

"Amazing how you know nothing and everything at the same time." Rika said and sighed. "It's basically an assembly at the Palace where representatives from each side of the wall gather and celebrate peace and unity in Tomoeda and blah, blah, blah.."

"It sounds familiar." She perused. "So, who usually goes?"

"Well from the North that will obviously be the Monarch. Oh, I wonder if the princess will be there. There's rumours that she has a really serious illness-"

"Who else?"

"Well, usually the majority is major celebs in the North. From the South, Base. The General and the likes. From the west I think it's mainly villages heads of something like that-"

"So maybe I'll get an invite?"

Rika burst out laughing and slapped her on the shoulder. "Please, you write a few articles and you think you'd get invited? No, Sakura no. You have to be the most prestigious of the Easterners to get an invite."

Sakura sighed. She had read over Nathala's diary. She mentioned the three M's. Military, Media, and Monarch. Sakura had her hooks in the first two, but she had made no progress with the North. She couldn't see a way into there.

"Ugh, I wish I could go." Rika said. "I heard that Terada Yoshiyuki was gonna be there. You know I met him once, long time ago when he came into the East. He shook my hand at the opening of the new shopping mall. What a _man._ I could have died there and then."

"You're married, Rika." Sakura said and raised an eyebrow.

"Ugh, yeah." Rika sighed and looked down at her wedding ring. "To be honest, I don't even know why Sota and I got married."

"I thought you guys were in love?"

Rika shrugged. "Yeah, maybe. It was just so hard to get an apartment by ourselves unless we _were_ married. I should have given it more thought. I'm so jealous of you. Being single and all romantic with powerful businessmen or soldiers or whatever."

"Will you keep your voice down?"

"I'm just saying. Maybe you're doing it right Sakura. I was always worried about you. Rebelling, not getting married when everyone else was, not settling, staying with your father. Sota keeps pushing for us to have kids."

Sakura looked over at her friend. It seemed thing were not so perfect for Rika and her marriage.

"What about you? Don't you want kids?" She asked.

Sakura scoffed. "Nope." The idea of kids never appealed to her. She wondered if Syaoran wanted kids.

Sakura jerked back as if someone hit her. Where the hell did that thought come from? Kids with Syaoran. How did her mind even jump to there? That was weird. Way to weird. She blushed and silenced her mind from lingering on that thought.

"What's wrong?" Rika asked.

"Nothing." She mumbled.

They sat in silence for a bit.

"You know, there is a way for you to get into the Palace ball." She said with a sneer.

"Really? How?"

Rika sneered again, laughing at whatever thought was going through her mind. "You can go as someone's plus one.

"Really? But who would take me?"

Rika covered her mouth to muffle her laughs. "Who do you think is prestigious enough to get an invite from the East?"

Sakura wracked her brain. Someone who would get an invite and would bring _her_ of all people.

"Oh God, no. Not _him._ "

Rika giggled and took out her purse to pay. "I'm afraid Sakura, if you want into that ball, he's your guy."

X x x

"Madison."

Tomoyo looked up to see her boss standing over her. His ever-worrying forehead was creased.

"Yes."

"I need you to do a few things for me. I'm swamped today. Do you mind?"

Tomoyo wiped her hands on her clothes and stood up. It was a strange thing to be so trusted by higher ups. Considering how she started here, she never thought she'd make it to managerial positions.

"What do you need?"

He mumbled about keeping up to Base's standards. They were coming down hard on them all recently. Although Tomoyo never asked why, preferring to keep herself out of politics.

"These pamphlets about the next town meeting need to be brought to the council for approval. Then, I need you get these to Mr. Hiirigazawa and have them signed. I'd do it myself but I'm needed by the coal mines today. He should be up in the warehouse somewhere."

He was so engrossed with his own schedule that he didn't notice Tomoyo's face drop. Her hands began to sweat.

"Um…I haven't finished picking my row and it's almost four thirty and-"

"Oh, someone will cover for you. Please, Madison, I really need your help here."

Tomoyo held in a sigh and took them from his hands without protest.

X

She found him easily.

He was in the warehouse counting the last of the stock for export. As if Tomoyo's luck couldn't get any worse, he was alone.

Her steady hands lost their nerve and began to shake. She gulped and told herself to get a grip. Why was she like this? Tomoyo was never like this. As she feared, she was losing her former self. She wanted to see him. But she didn't want to _want_ to.

Eriol stopped, sensing her behind him, he turned his head towards her. Tomoyo pushed her legs forward. Stopping a few feet in front of him, she kept her head down and mumbled.

"Mr Bison need you to sign these and write down how much is missing."

Her voice came out so quick she wondered if he even grasped what she said.

 _Idiot._ She thought then forced herself to make eye contact with him. He was looking back without hesitance. He took the clipboard from her and signed with an amused smile on his face.

When he handed it back to her, his face was still soft and smiling, which threw her off. She held the clipboard in front of her, as if it were a shield to ward off impulsive moves. She was not worried about what he'd do, but what she'd do. The impulsion to repeat their rough night of passion was dangerously taking hold of her.

She should leave, now.

"Madison." He said before she could disappear quickly.

She turned around.

"Yes?"

"You don't have to avoid me." He said and crossed his arms.

Tomoyo felt her face go crimson. But that rare smile on his face melted her heart. Tomoyo swallowed and felt a familiar smirk cross her face. "Avoiding you? I'm not avoiding you. If you haven't noticed, I'm a very busy woman." She said with a straighter spine.

When she raised her eyebrow and smirked that way, Eriol felt excitement that only she invoked in him. He was worried their infidelity had muted it in her. He was glad to see it was still very much there.

Eriol was amused by this and took two steps forward. Their toes almost touching. This movement gave Tomoyo goosebumps.

"Well, thank you for making time for me."

Tomoyo tilted her head up dangerously close to his face but he didn't retract. It was intense, she didn't want to cave. In the end, they both did. His arms looped around tightly as they felt the familiar feel of each others lips. The passion that burned at that moment kept feelings of wrongness and guilt at bay. Eriol was intoxicated by her smell. His hands were rough with her but he knew she could take it. She takes everything he or anyone throws at her.

She was pressed between the cold rusted warehouse wall and the intense heat of his body. His hands dove down to raise her skirt and feel the soft skin of her hips and waist. Her hands gripped his strong shoulders and she braced herself to be taken by him. His hands moved to undo the buttons of her dress, eager for her skin to touch hers.

A clang from the other side of the room made them both jump back. They swerved their heads towards the direction of the noise. They held their breath with wide eyes. Had they been discovered?

A squirrel pounced onto a barrel and scattered away. They both sighed in relief.

Tomoyo straightened her dress out again and tucked her hair back. Eriol's hand took hers and tugged her forward into him. She followed blindly and tilted her head to allow him to kiss her again. His hands were so tender as they caressed her back, holding her close. Small, modest kisses and light touches kept them from breaking apart. They didn't want to. The raw, sexual passion had muted, but was replaced by something Tomoyo didn't see coming, affection.

She felt light, dizzy even with these soft touches. She had never experienced it before in her whole life.

"Eriol" She whispered softly, as to not break off this gentle atmosphere.

He tipped his forehead against and looked into her eyes, which held the anxiety he was feeling.

"I know." He said, reading her thoughts. He pulled back slightly and brushed a piece of black hair from her face.

"I can't stop thinking about it. About you." She confessed. It was driving her crazy. She felt so desperate saying this. It was so cliché but so accurate of her state of mind.

"Me too." He admitted without hesitance. She had been constantly in her mind. He had tried to block it, distract himself. He busied himself in as much work as possible. He was miserable doing that. With the rising tensions in the West, Eriol thought his mind would implode under the pressure. Until he thought of her, and he could cope. In the end, he stopped pushing her from his thoughts. He couldn't deny it anymore. He wanted her. And this just felt so right. So…compatible.

"Madison, I'm the one whose married. You needn't feel guilt."

"But I do."

Eriol nodded. Of course, Tomoyo wouldn't be able to phase Ruby out of her mind.

Despite thoughts of Ruby guiltily haunting their minds, they kissed again.

When she left, she was light and almost giddy. She pressed both hands to her cheeks to muffle a childlike squeal. She felt high and forced her mind to remember everything of what just happened. They agreed they'd meet after the town meeting.

This thought alone made Tomoyo's beam and her face hurt with grins.

 _Fuck_ , she thought. _I think I've fallen for him…_

X x x

"Don't your hands hurt?" She asked.

Tomoyo bit her cheek from rolling a sarcastic remark. "Yes, but it's for Utopia, right?" Well, she _almost_ got away without sarcasm.

Sakura smirked and scribbled into her notebook. Tomoyo picked up her basket of Mirth and moved onto the next row to help another labourer.

"Why is your accent so different?" She said in a string of questions Tomoyo thought would never end.

"I guess I'm just unique." Tomoyo responded and sat back for a break.

Sakura joined her on the ground and passed her a bottle of water. Tomoyo was in a good humour lately and was even answering some of Sakura's questions.

"What are you going to do by the way? With that little notebook of yours?" Tomoyo asked and rubbed her aching shoulders. The cold snap was coming in. Sakura snapped her book closed and threw it into her bag. Tomoyo rolled her eyes.

"I see, top information?"

"Something like that."

"I read your article." Tomoyo said. "Hmpf."

" _Hmpf?"_ Sakura asked raising an eyebrow. "With you, I'm not sure how to take that."

Tomoyo tossed her head back and looked up at the clouds. Sakura could understand why the villagers were fascinated with Tomoyo. She was stunning in a very strange, exotic way. Since Sakura had first met her, her pale, delicate skin had, tanned, her hands were rougher. She was beginning to look like a Westerner, but not quite. Her eyes, wide, blue and piercing, were something from outside these walls.

"I guess I just don't understand you. Your articles make out that this place is like some sort of peaceful retreat. Yet the way you talk would suggest otherwise."

Sakura smirked and didn't reply.

"Oh, so you can ask questions but I can't."

"Guess so." Sakura said and shrugged.

The two had become somewhat friends. Unlikely friends at that. What Tomoyo once considered a cold, sterile woman, she had come to see and resilient and observant. She liked Sakura.

"Madison!" A girl shouted and ran across two fields to get two her. The girls name was Rei Tachibana and she had a particular attachment to Tomoyo who in return, had grown fond of her too. She was only about fifteen but she was a fast little thing. That's why she was sent on errands and deliveries.

"Look!" She said and uncapped her hands. "I found them by the river bank. Only three of them, but look!"

Tomoyo and Sakura peered into the girl's hands and saw two small flowers, they're petals struggling to cover the bud.

"Are they…Sakura flowers?" Sakura asked and the girl nodded giddily. "I thought they stopped growing here."

"Me too." Rei replied. "But two must have struggled through. Weird though, since it's not even spring.

The girl agreed and tucked one into her hair. Delighted with herself, she took off again.

"You're very popular." Sakura commented.

Tomoyo shrugged. "Good parenting, I suppose."

"I see, where are your parents from, again?"

"Nice try." Tomoyo laughed as her eyes grazed the fields until she saw Eriol. Her heart thudded a little harder. She sucked into the cool air to relax herself.

Sakura followed his line of vision and raised her brow. "Still obsessing over that, I see."

Tomoyo, gritted her teeth, annoyed that she was so obvious. "You're irritatingly observant, you know."

"It's one of my better qualities. Wow," She said discreetly. "You're blushing."

Tomoyo blushed harder. "N-no I'm not."

"Now you're stuttering."

"And you're annoying."

Sakura shrugged. Tomoyo didn't take this as accusation. If Sakura were one of her old Northern friends, she'd have been teased maliciously about her not-to-subtle thing with Eriol. And Tomoyo, being the Princes, would have had to take it.

Tomoyo was thankful that Sakura didn't delve into it any further. As observant as Sakura was, Tomoyo knew she had more important things to be focused on than her. Still, Tomoyo felt this secret boil up in her. She wanted to tell someone. To justify herself even. She looked over to Sakura, who was fingering a Mirth bud in her hands with an inquisitive, intense stare. Sakura didn't seem to judge, just observe. Maybe Sakura was the perfect person to unload onto. She was cold, but in a way you could trust. Tomoyo didn't expect her to be a therapist, perhaps listen without judgment. Or perhaps that would go the other way. Sakura didn't seem like the type to hold back on cold, brutal honesty either.

She could see Sakura now, with her intense stare, small frame and soft yet incredibly honest voice; _What your doing is wrong. You know this. You're carrying on with it for selfish reasons. You obviously don't care about Ruby, you're just pretending to. Don't kid yourself._ Tomoyo could hear Sakura say it so clearly that she shuddered.

Sakura hopped to her feet suddenly, the action drowning out Tomoyo. With a large smile on her face she walked away from Tomoyo. Tomoyo looked past her and groaned.

Toya.

He welcomed her with a brotherly hug. Tomoyo rolled her eyes and wondered how those tow could possibly be related. If she really was anything like him, maybe Tomoyo should just keep to herself.

"I thought you weren't coming." Sakura said and pulled back to look at him. They have seen each other on a regular basis but Sakura was still surprised each time to see him so alive and well.

They walked side by side, the conversation dipping in and out from their father, to troubles in the West, to casual things.

Suddenly, Sakura came to an abrupt stop.

"What's wrong?" Toya asked, seeing the worried expression on her face. Sakura bit her lip and looked behind her towards the dirt road.

She couldn't explain it. But she felt like something very, very bad was about to happen.

X x x

At first there was nothing, and then there was the clear rumble of vans headed their way.

Eriol looked up and squinted. Three, maybe four vans coming their way. A second later they came to view. Two vans and two tanks.

"Fuck. Tanks? Seriously?" Mumbled Mr Bison. "What could they possibly want now?"

Eriol didn't answer and made his way up towards the path.

Tomoyo was hunkered down, protected from sight from the tall Mirth stalks. She bent down lower and felt the deep vibrations of the tanks run aggressively in the soil.

Toya grabbed Sakura's wrist and pulled her down to cover too. Toya's disguise could fool the local authorities in the village, but soldiers from Base…his luck wasn't that strong.

"Toya, why are we-"

"Just keep low." He answered.

They were far from where the tanks pulled up, they wouldn't be seen. Sakura didn't question her brother.

Mrs Hiirigazawa concealed herself into a tent along with Ruby. "What is he doing?" She whispered in fear as her husband marched up to meet the tank as if it were nothing.

"Leave him be." Mrs Hiirigazawa said. "He knows what he's doing.

Eriol kept walking until he was a few feet from the tank. The tank halted. Its mighty sounds echoed into silence. It didn't stir. From the van behind the tank, the door opened and Lieutenant Meiling Li stepped out.

Eriol's face hardened. Whenever she was around, trouble for him was guaranteed.

"Lieutenant Li." Eriol said through clenched teeth. "What do we owe such a dramatic entrance for? I heard you were demoted."

Meiling smiled wickedly, choosing to ignore that comment.

"Oh, this?" She said nodding towards the tanks. "Nothing serious. Pretend we're not even here."

As if on cue the tanks opened and from them emerged other soldiers. Alarm bells went off in Eriol's head. All of these soldiers were armed.

"I don't recognize these soldiers." Toya whispered to Sakura.

Sakura squinted and froze when she realized. "They're not soldiers." She whispered. "They're cadets."

Sakura's eyes widened as she made out the distinguishable bright blond hair of Cadet Chiharu.

"No." Sakura breathed.

Chiharu's hair was not in it's cute pigtails anymore. It was cut severely short and razored underneath to give her a harder, polished look. Her face, which once shined brightly was hallow and blank. A gun sat in her waist belt. What on earth had happened to her?

Eriol face dropped as about two dozen what seemed like young teenagers passed by his with guns and rifles strapped to their back.

"What the hell is this?" Eriol said, trying to keep his voice calm as to not instil fear into the already petrified faces of the workers.

Meiling's face screwed up into a smile, delighted at the panic in Eriol's voice.

"Oh, this? Like I said. Nothing serious. I'm just trying out a few things."

"Why are they here? With guns?"

"Oh, don't mind them. They're just kids. They're just training." Meiling screwed her face into a smirk as she watched like a proud mother as the cadet's shuffle into the mirth fields

"For what?" He said narrowing his eyes.

Meiling smiled innocently and scanned her eyes over the frightened faces of the workers, who were distracted by the line of armed teenagers with hardened faces in front of them.

"Observation." She said with a look that dared him to question her further.

Eriol began to protest but she had cut him off. "You're needed elsewhere. Mrs Hiirigazawa." She said waving papers into his face.

Eriol took them and scanned them. "This is not my field. It's nothing to do with me."

"Well then, make it your field. If you want the planning permission for your adorable new hospital I'd get over to that building site right now."

Eriol clenched his fists. Something was seriously off here.

"Don't worry." Said with a sinister glint in her eye. "I'll watch over your little farm fields while you're gone."

Two soldiers appeared by Eriol's side to escort him away. Meiling was up to something. There was no doubt about that. But Eriol was outnumbered and obeyed. He'd later wished he didn't.

"Back to work!" Meiling barked.

They did as they were told. Meiling signalled the cadets to move into the field to observe. The workers kept their heads low, not daring to look up for fear of their life. A cadet walked past Tomoyo, who's head was so low it was practically in the dirt.

"Toya, what the hell are they doing?" Sakura asked.

"Observation, it seems. Although, they've never been this heavily armed. If you ask me, they're looking for trouble." Toya glared over at Meiling. He knew she was the one after him for months. It gave Toya such pleasure in the past when he'd walk right past her in his soldier's uniform and she wouldn't even look a fraction his way. Her search for him was driving her insane.

"We have to do something." Sakura said. "We can't just sit here."

"No." Toya said and grabbed her wrist, dragging her back to cover. "There's nothing we can do right now. Just sit tight."

Meiling herself walked into the fields. She was hungry for blood. She scanned the cadets. _Her_ cadets. She had moulded them, broke them one by one until their smiles ceased and they were filled with the purpose to serve only her, and Tomoeda. She had become obsessed with them. The demotion had crushed her. To see someone like Syaoran elevated above her again and again sickened her. It won't happen again. Lieutenant General Mizuki left her with nothing but a group of untrained misfits. Fine. Meiling would see to it that they would serve purpose. Mizuki recognized her efforts quickly and gave Meiling permission to do what needed to be done to send a message. By God, Meiling would find cause to exert her powers.

The workers trembled under Meiling's gaze as her boots marched on with purpose.

And then she found it.

Rei Tachibana tried not to whimper as Meiling's boots stopped in front of her. She thought they'd move on and intimidate someone else. They didn't.

 _Don't look up, don't look up_. She told herself. But it was too much to bear. Rei's eyes only wanted to glance up for a second. But when they met the sharp intensity of Meiling's, she was paralysed in fear. Meiling's gaunt face smiled, sending panic into Rei.

"Do you have a name, savage?" Meiling asked with a dark calmness.

Rei swallowed and tried to make her mouth form words.

"Y-yes Ma'am. Tachibana Rei, ma'am."

By now, most people were either looking over at them, or listening while pretending to work.

Meiling gave a sharp laugh. "Ma'am? I am a Lieutenant. Addressing me incorrectly, that an offense."

Rei's face paled.

A few feet away. Tomoyo held her breath and prayed Meiling would move on.

"I apologize ma'- Ms. Lieutenant," Rei gave a very small fear-stricken laugh.

"Is this amusing to you? Tachibana?" Meiling's voice gave some humour but there was dark intent behind it.

Sakura's heart thumped. "Toya, this is bad. Meiling's looking for a reason to do something." Sakura had to do something to distract her.

Toya's hand once again clamped down on Sakura. He brought his face close to hers. "Don't. Move." His voice was almost hissing. Sakura blinked hard. He had never spoken to her so harshly before. This was not advice, this was a warning. Why was Toya sitting by doing nothing? Something shifted there. Sakura felt something very wrong.

 _Just keep you head down, Rei._ Tomoyo begged in her mind. _Just say nothing!_

"No, Lieutenant. Not at all. I just…" Rei stuttered.

Meiling's head cocked to the side. Although she had a small smile, there was something in her eyes that made Tomoyo squirm.

"What is that in your hair, savage?" Meiling asked in a harsher tone.

Rei squinted and blinked twice. Then it dawned on her, it dawned on them all.

"Oh God…" Sakura whispered.

Rei placed a hand on her head and felt it. Her face paled. She plucked it out immediately and glanced down at it in her hand. Sweat broke out on her forehead. She thought she'd be sick.

"What is that? Savage?" Meiling said, taking another intimidating step forward.

Rei mumbled something inaudible.

"What was that, savage? I couldn't hear you." Meiling's voice was did not hold back now. Everyone stopped working and looked up at them in fear.

Rei's hand shook. "It's…it's a Sakura flower, Lieutenant." She said with her voice almost breaking.

"I see." Meiling said in a tone that signalled she had come to a conclusion in her mind. "You know they're banned, don't you, savage? That's treason. And yet you see it fit to wear it in front of military, in front of civilians. Tell me, savage, are you trying to start a rebellion? Are you attempting to convert people-"

"No ma'am- Lieutenant. I just saw it. I- I didn't think anything of it at the time-"

"You didn't think that what you were wearing in your hair is a representation of anti-Utopianism? That is represents the deaths of hundreds of civilians? Of a time of turmoil before the great revolution?" Meiling's voice boomed now, demanding everyone's attention.

Rei couldn't speak. Of course not. Of course, she didn't think that. She was only a teenager. She just thought it was pretty.

"I-I'm sorry Lieutenant. It was a mistake." She said with tears hovering in her eyes.

Tomoyo was frozen. No one could do anything. Meiling didn't care about the Sakura flower, she was out for blood, and Rei was in her line of vision.

Meiling's mouth curled up into the most sinister smile yet. "Yes, savage. It was a mistake. A big mistake, which has serious consequences."

Meiling lifted up her jacket and produced a gun.

There were widespread gasps.

Sakura couldn't sit back any longer. She was an innocent girl. If Meiling wanted blood, Sakura would risk herself. She moved from Toya and went to stand up. Quick as a bullet, Toya launched at her and tackled her to the ground so silently. Sakura's head thudded off the ground and before she could even reason with what happened, Toya straddled her.

"I told you to stay put." He hissed lowly.

Sakura's voice caught in her throat with fright. He glared at her. Her mouth parted with fright and his hands squeezed her arms, preventing her from moving. The weight of him keeping her down made it hard to breath.

"Toya-"

"Shut up and do what I told you! Don't fucking move from this spot. Let this play out how it will."

Sakura dared not say another word. For in that moment, the man glaring incredulously at her was not her brother. This was someone else, he frightened her more than any person or soldier had before.

Sakura struggled to swallow a lump in her throat.

"Ok." She breathed and he released her. She rubbed her arms where he grabbed her. Her heart was pounding from that encounter, and the one between Rei and Meiling which Toya had forbade her from intervening in.

The gun was pointed in Rei's face. Meiling stalled, not through hesitance, but because something was wheeling around in her mind.

"Stop!" A woman shouted and began to sprint over to them. She didn't even make it five feet before a boy no older than sixteen knocked her out with the butt of his rifle.

Tomoyo knew who that was. It was Rei's mother.

"Anyone who dared intervene will have to deal with serious consequences!" Meiling barked and the workers moved back slightly, fearing their own lives.

"She's lost it," Mrs Hiirigazawa said and placed a hand over her mouth in shock.

Ruby's heart pounded as she looked out of the tent in fear.

 _Where did you go, Eriol? Only you can stop this._

Meiling peered back at Rei, who looked like she'd vomit at any moment. Meiling ran her tongue over her teeth and pondered. Every second that dragged on was agony to all who were witnessing. Then, finally, Meiling lowered her gun and strapped it back into her belt.

Rei collapsed in relief.

 _Thank God._ Tomoyo said and relaxed her shoulders.

It was over, or so everyone thought.

"Cadet Chiharu!" Meiling barked.

Chiharu flinched and looked up. Her legs hesitated for a moment before making their way towards Meiling. Meiling's wicked smile bounced from Rei to her.

"Do you still have your pistol?"

Chiharu cleared her throat. "Yes, Lieutenant Li."

"Good." She said. "Take care of this savage."

X x x


	18. Game Changer

X x x

Chiharu froze.

Meiling's words echoed in her head and she struggled to act on her command.

 _No, no, no…_ Sakura thought. Not Chiharu, anyone but her.

Sakura wanted to jump up and put some sort of end to this. Not that she had the power to, but she could distract them. Do something, anything.

But she didn't dare move. She glanced over at Toya, who was staring intensely at Meiling. Sakura could see he was thinking about something. She wished she knew what was going through his mind. Why was he so adamant she didn't stop this? Did he want this to continue? By the expression on his face, Sakura knew there was something else going on. After he threatened her, Sakura didn't dare go against him. Toya's hands were still clamped on her shoulder, preventing her from going anywhere. It was as if he knew she was tempted to intervene/

She didn't dare protest at the pain he was causing her.

A deathly silence rang across the whole Mirth field. Was this ever going to end?

Chiharu seemed more inclined to run from Meiling than to follow her command.

"Don't make me ask you again, Cadet." Meiling warned and narrowed her eyes.

Chiharu struggled to unfreeze her legs and move forward. Under Meiling's hawk-like glare, Chiharu produced her pistols with trembling hands. It felt so heavy in her hands, suddenly foreign despite the endless drills Meiling had put her and the other Cadets through over the past few weeks. Chiharu's hands began to sweat.

Tomoyo watched on in horror as the child stepped in front of Rei.

 _She won't do it._ Sakura thought. _No, that's not Chiharu. She won't._

When Chiharu raised her gun to Rei's head, it became all too real.

Mr Bison tried to interfere peacefully but Meiling had her gun aimed at him quickly. "Interfering in military commands is a serious and very punishable offense. Don't forget about the two-generation punishment. Step down, or you and your family will be next."

 _She's enjoying this._ Tomoyo thought and felt sick to her stomach.

Mr Bison stepped back. He wouldn't risk that. No one would. He looked to Rei with sorrowful eyes. He tried.

Chiharu hovered the gun over Rei's head. They were the same age. Chiharu's hands were sweating so much she thought the gun would slip right out of her hand.

With every second that went by, Meiling grew more impatient. Rei's cries were stuck in her throat as she placed a hand in front of her face as if it would shield her from the bullet.

"That's an order Cadet! She is a rebel! Kill her!" Meiling barked with fury in her eyes.

Chiharu's hand wobbled back and forth, unable to keep a steady aim. The other cadets looked on with their hearts racing but faces neutral. They had been trained to do this and they knew better than to look weak in front of Meiling or else face the consequences. Chiharu would be the first of them to kill. They were glad it wasn't them.

Sweat broke out on Chiharu's back.

"Do it, Cadet! Do it now! It's your duty! Do it!" Meiling roared right into Chiharu's ear, almost knocking her over.

Chiharu's vision went dizzy, her breathing shallowed. Her finger twitched between indecision and duty.

Just squeeze, just squeeze the trigger…

The gun shot rang out.

Sakura breath, and everyone else's caught in their throats. All eyes watched on in horror as Rei's body slumped over with an ungraceful thud.

The silence was broken by a wailing scream. Two people ran over to Rei's lifeless body but were stopped by two workers. The scene was horrifying, Rei's family didn't need to see that. Everyone rose to their feet and spoke in low panicked and shocked whispers.

Chiharu stumbled backwards away from Rei's body. She fought hard with the urge to vomit and cry at the same time. Meiling strolled over to her smiling as if it were her daughter winning a volleyball game. She threw an arm around the trembling cadet and whispered into her ear.

"I've finally broken you."

She then gave Chiharu a rough shove towards the tank. Her purpose of the day was done. Sakura saw Chiharu stumbled towards the tank. Her face was a pale and sickly green.

"Back to work!" Meiling commanded to the idle workers. "And let this be a lesson to you all. Anyone, found to have links with a rebellion, or any involvement with anti-Utopian activity, shall suffer the same."

Everyone looked at Meiling with horror and disgust. But Meiling smirked, revelling in it. She was feared, and it felt wonderful.

Toya's hand finally loosened from Sakura's shoulder. She looked over to him but his face was concealed under his soldiers cap. He was shaking. She wondered if he were crying.

"Toya?" She asked, her own voice trembling.

Toya looked up. Not at her, but at the scene in front of him. "It's begun." He said and shot up, not bothered about being spotted.

"What has?" Sakura asked. "Toya, why didn't we do anything? Isn't this what we wanted to prevent?"

"Don't, _ever_ question or defy me again." Toya said darkly which made the hairs on her neck stand. "Something like this had to happen. Don't cross me again." He stalked off before Sakura could say anymore.

Something in his eyes were so cold, so…hating. There was more to this than Toya was telling her. It frightened her. Sakura looked back at the growing crowd. Cries and wails were heard above everything else.

Sakura looked from it to Toya. Did he want this to happen?

Sakura looked over to where that evil woman was. Meiling's smirk seemed in-erasable. It boiled Sakura's blood. She was angry, frightened…

Meiling looked up and suddenly, that smirked disappeared from her face when she saw Sakura standing there. Her sudden halt had gained the attention from others. Sakura thought Meiling would bark at her, but instead, Meiling's own face paled. She opened her lips to say something but no words came out.

"H-how long has she been standing there?" She said flustered.

People noticed Meiling's sudden change in character. She tried to hold herself but it was obvious Sakura's presence had thrown her. Sakura stood tall, clutching her notebook in her hand. Meiling panicked seeing Sakura's camera hanging on her neck, pen and notebook in hand. How long had she been there? Witnessing?

"Escort her back to Base. NOW!" Meiling barked.

Meiling didn't even look up to meet Sakura's eyes as she stalked away from her.

 _Damn it!_ Meiling cursed. _Kaho said no outside witnesses. Why her? Why of all people was Kinomoto there, in this field?_

Meiling grabbed a nearby soldier and hissed in his ear. "I want her questioned ASAP."

Two soldiers, neither of them Toya, stood by Sakura and ushered her away from the scene. Although they weren't openly rough with her, she knew they were urgent to get her away from the scene. Sakura didn't understand what about her made Meiling so afraid. Because she was from the East?

Sakura was ushered past Rei's body.

Her stomach dropped. Chiharu's aim was terribly off. The bullet pierced at an angle through Rei's right eye. Bits of skull and skin hung away from her once innocent face. The blood splatter was everywhere, staining every stalk of mirth around her.

In her hand, somehow, Rei managed to hold onto the small Sakura flower.

Sakura's chest tightened.

Meiling was wrong. The Sakura did not represent rebellion and chaos.

It represented hope.

X x x

Eriol's ear twitched.

A gun shot.

He turned towards the direction of the noise. It was coming from the mirth field he just left. That bad feeling he had earlier had returned with an almighty punch to the stomach. He looked down at the tedious paper in his hands. The soldiers had been mucking around back and forth with unnecessary questions. They said it was important, it was necessary.

No, it was stalling.

Eriol shoved the papers into their hands and against their protests, he sprinted back towards the fields.

A terrible, terrible feeling began to rise in him.

When he arrived there, the scene was disturbing. No one was working. People were standing idle as if in a trance, others were huddled around each other and consoling one another.

Eriol took a step forward but retreated when he was almost knocked down by two oncoming soldiers. They barged passed him and between them, they were practically dragging Sakura towards the van. She wasn't protesting, she had a vacant look in her face.

"Sakura." He called.

She struggled to look back at him with big, green shocked eyes that conveyed that whatever happened, it was as bad as he thought.

Eriol went towards the big group that was huddled around the fields. He caught sight of Ruby, who was shaking all over. His mother was holding her up.

"Ruby, what happened?" He asked desperately.

Ruby opened her mouth to answer but burst into tears instead.

"Ruby-"

"This must be dealt with, Eriol!" His mother interrupted sternly. Something must be done, we cannot stand by and do nothing anymore."

Before Eriol could ask what the hell had happened Mrs Hiirigazawa ushered herself and Ruby past him.

The mirth whipped at his knees as he closed in on the group. He way was blocked by the last person he ever wanted to see.

Toya.

For once, Toya did not hold a smirk of confidence. His face was hard as a stone and his eyes were laced with hate.

"You let this happen. You let things get this far. You're going to lead them all to their deaths." There was so much venom in his voice that Eriol didn't think to retaliate.

Toya pushed past him, offering no other explanation. Eriol's legs were suddenly heavy. Eriol didn't even know what happened, and already he knew it was his fault. Then, as the crowd parted to make was for Eriol to see, he almost keeled over.

Eriol shut his eyes but he could still see the intense red of her blood. He pieced it together. He didn't need any more explanation. He felt rage, anger, sorrow but most of all, guilt. How was he not here to do something? How could he have been misled so easily?

As he looked around he saw it in the villager's eyes. They use to look at him with hope. But now their eyes were powdered with blame and accusation.

 _Where were you when this was happening?_

Out of everyone in this village, Eriol had the power to do something. He had failed them.

Eriol balled his fists and marched over to Meiling. To hell was she going to get away with this.

"Do you think you'll get away with this?" He said restraining himself.

Meiling seemed distracted and gave him a casual smirk. "Oh? You're back. How did it go?"

"You will not get away with this Li. As corrupt as Base is there are courts that deal with issues like these. I won't stop until you answer to what you did."

"Answer to what? That young girl went crazy at one of my cadets. She was just protecting herself. Isn't that right, Cadet?"

Chiharu glanced up with big sunken eyes. Slowly she just nodded. She did not even have the strength left to absorb Meiling's lies.

"Bullshit." Eriol spat.

None of this seemed to affect Meiling. She laughed. "Of course, Mr. Hiirigazawa, take me to court. Of course, you remember the conditions of that court, right?"

"There are witnesses, Li. Don't think they won't testify against you."

"Of course they will. But your account is the only one accepted into court. Tell me again, what did you witness here?"

Eriol went to reply but fell short.

Meiling had thought this through. Eriol could only testify to what he saw. Those were the conditions. Thanks to Meiling's stalling, he had witnessed nothing. He had nothing on her. She would get away with it scott-free.

"A pleasure, as always Mr. Hiirigazawa." She said slyly and hopped into the van. The tanks and vans chucked to life and scrambled away from the mirth fields and back to base where they would certainly reward themselves for a job well done.

Eriol headed back to the field defeated. He had failed. There was nothing he could do. Then, sitting slumped between two rows of mirth, he saw Tomoyo staring at the ground, her face a mixture of white and green.

"Madison," He said and knelt down to her. She only responded the third time he called her.

Tomoyo looked up, realizing she hadn't budged this whole time.

"Eriol…" She breathed. She was shaking. Eriol reached for her and wanted to pull her into him. She looked so frightened. He wanted to touch her face to bring some warmth into her colourless cheeks. He almost did until the wailing of someone nearby pulled them into reality. Even in that moment, he had to keep his guard up. He fought against his inner urge and helped her onto her feet, holding on a second longer than he needed to.

"Go home." He whispered into her ear. "I'll…" His voice trailed off. He'll what? What could he do for her? Comfort her? Comfort himself?

She nodded, understanding. He had things he needed to do now. Tomoyo began to walk away but stopped for just a second.

"Why would they do this?" She asked.

It wasn't a question directed at him. She didn't know who it was for.

Eriol had no answer that would satisfy her.

X x x

He slammed his table onto the metal table.

"We will not tolerate lying! So re-think your answer!" He barked. "What did you witness!?"

Sakura clenched her teeth and looked up at the bald red-faced man. He was becoming so infuriated with her that she thought he'd pop out of his uniform. She stayed silent.

"Who authorized you to go into the west? What is your business there?" He fired question after question before Sakura could even answer one.

"Answer me!" He said and slammed another fat palm onto the table. Sakura clenched her teeth and looked up at him silently with angry green eyes.

"I was there for work." She answered, not concealing the venom in her voice. "I work for the Tomoedan Mirror. Ask my boss, like I've told you over and over again." Her voice roses towards the end.

She was seething in her metal chair. She had been in the interrogation room for about an hour now. They were determined to break her. But she wouldn't give them what they wanted.

"What did you witness?" Said the other soldier who was sitting back with a cigarette, boots resting on the table. The grimy soles of his boots made Sakura recoil back into her seat.

Sakura sucked in the stale, smoky air. They both glared at her, daring her to think carefully.

For the dozenth time, Sakura answered. "I saw Lieutenant Meiling Li bully a cadet into shooting an unarmed Western civilian"-

"No!" The solder roared again and flung the table hard to the other side of the room. Sakura jumped but tried not to let it phase her. "Don't you lie, you piece of Eastern trash. Lieutenant Meiling Li acted in self-defence against an unstable rebel. Now, repeat that into the mic." He demanded.

Sakura looked down at the mike. The tape recorder whizzed a monotonous tone in the background. They wanted her statement. They wanted to make today disappear. What Sakura didn't understand was why they were even giving her a chance. Why haven't they just killed her yet? Eliminated the problem? They waited for their response. Sakura leaned forward towards the mike.

"I saw Lieutenant Meiling Li bully a cadet into murdering a Western-"

The soldier lost it and swiped the mike from her. Bringing back the table he slammed a written statement in front of her.

"Sign it." He hissed. "And we'll let you go. Otherwise you'll be here for a very long ti-"

The large metal door behind them opened.

Syaoran entered.

The two soldiers scrambled to salute him, one coughing as he choked on his cigarette smoke. Sakura breathed a mental sigh of relief.

"Lieutenant Colonel!" They said in unison.

Syaoran excused them. His tone was distant, unreadable.

The two soldiers left immediately and the door closed with a harsh thud. They were alone now.

Syaoran said nothing as he pulled down the blind to the observation window. He then walked over to the mike and stopped the recording. Sakura had kept her eyes down. She didn't know what he would say. She didn't have to look up. He knelt down in front of her and lifted her chin up with his fingers.

His eyes had softened. Sakura saw they reflected pity. She didn't need his pity. Sakura was still alive. Rei was not. Yet still, with his kind touch in a day of destruction and chaos, it got to Sakura deeper than she wanted it to.

 _No, no, no_. She told herself. _Now you have to be strong. You can't be weak now._

But a tear rolled down her cheek and betrayed her.

"Sakura…" He whispered.

She broke. Her hands shielded her face from the tears that came next. She fell to her knees and into his chest. She sobbed so softly and quietly. Syaoran's arms embraced her and her and he kissed the top of her head. He rested his cheek on the top of her head and inhaled her scent, thankful that she made it out unharmed today.

Sakura kept seeing Chiharu standing over Rei. Why didn't she do anything? She just…sat there. And there was so much blood. Sakura knew that image would stay with her forever. But even as Syaoran was comforting her, he was stirred with his own rage.

Meiling.

He never thought her obsession with the cadets would be taken this far. She had to be dealt with. Meiling had changed. She had been possessed by a new determination that seemed to widen her limits. He knew it had to do with Kaho, who was all too willing to have armed cadets, a secret desire she's always had. Now that Meiling was willing to do it for her, Kaho was protected from any possible backfire.

Syaoran understood now.

Meiling was not demoted for 'bad performance'. Kaho wanted her in control of the cadets. More importantly, she wanted Syaoran's influence away from them. Because Meiling would do to them what Syaoran wouldn't. She'd break them.

Sakura stopped shaking and pulled away from him. Her eyes were raw, she was exhausted.

He caressed her face and she leaned into his open palm. Sakura closed her eyes and allowed herself to feel safe for just a moment.

But only a moment.

When she opened her eyes again Syaoran knew that the clogs in her mind were beginning to spin again, hatching a plan that would no doubt worry Syaoran. She leaned away from him and stood up.

"Sakura…" He took a step towards her but she shot her hands out. Now was not the time to think so selfishly.

"Syaoran," She said with a bit more of her usual bite. "I know why you're here. And the answer is no. I won't sign it."

Syaoran could feel a standoff approaching already.

"You have to. They won't let you leave here until you do."

"They won't, or you won't?"

"Pick one." He said, matching her defiance.

He was there because he cared. He was concerned for her but above all, he wanted to protect her. And he could only do that if she signed the statement. He didn't want this going any higher than him because if it did, it was out of his hands. Syaoran had to protect her from the Meilings, the Mizuki's and the Generals who wouldn't think twice about locking her up. Or worse.

"You know I won't Syaoran. That thing is a lie. Meiling is out of control. They killed an innocent girl!"

"I know, Sakura. OK? I know that." He said, raising his voice. He was trying to stay calm.

"Then why would you ask me to sign that?"

"Because either way they'll sweep all of this under the rug. You _know_ this, Sakura. There's no way this will see the light of day!"

"So you want me to be quiet? Pretend I saw nothing?"

"For now, yes." He said and stared her down. She was so small yet so defiant. Why couldn't she just see it from his side for a moment?

"If not for you, for others then."

Sakura's eyes widened in fear when she caught on to his meaning. "You mean…they'll hurt my father?" Panic rushed into her voice. "But he didn't do anything, he wasn't even there."

"I know." He breathed. "But they'll use whatever is necessary to get you to confess. I know the statemen is a lie. But if you're going to go down and possibly bring your father with you, at least don't do it over something you don't stand a chance of winning. You can't take them bastards down with no evidence."

Syaoran looked at her and she could see in his eyes, there was a defiance and a hunger that she never saw before. This hurt him too. Chiharu was like a little sister to him. Seeing how Meiling had broken her…it had stirred a fight in Syaoran that he didn't even know he had.

He came over to her and placed his hands on her shoulders. He looked her square in the eye with enough intensity to even silence her for a moment.

"Sakura, either way, your signature will end up on that statement. Whether it's you or it's forged, it will happen, and then this whole incident will disappear." His voice then dropped to a whisper. "Meiling will not get away with this. But for now, it's your word against hers. You have nothing. They will shut you down before you could even tell anyone. We have to wait. You need to give me time to stop Meiling."

Sakura furrowed her brow. He…he was taking her side in a round-a-bout way.

"But…but it's a lie."

"I know. But for now, it protects you." He was not going to ignore it. What happened to that girl was horrendous and unjust but, Sakura was all that Syaoran was concerned for. He could see her fight to bring them to justice, but Syaoran could also see she could not win this round against Meiling.

"Syaoran this is bigger than me. The priority is the West." She said with an almost defeated voice.

"My priority is you." He said.

She began to shake her head and back away from him but he held her in place. "I know your cause. But your word alone will convince nobody. You need to wait for something bigger."

"Bigger than unprovoked murder?"

"Unfortunately, yes."

Sakura wanted to fight him, but she saw some truth to his words. The East have been trained to think a certain way. If she went knocking door to door about this with no evidence, no pictures, they wouldn't believe her. Her accessibility privilege into the West would be revoked. Not to mention the repercussions on her father. And Toya. She'd never see him again.

Toya…his manner today was another factor that was eating her. Perhaps she was wrong about him…

It wasn't fair.

She swallowed hard. As much as it pained her, she nodded slowly. She reached for the pen.

"But you said-"

"I know. I'll forge it. I'll do it badly." He said.

Sakura questioned him no further. If the statement came out against her, at least the forgery will be easy to prove. Syaoran would swear to witnessing her signing it.

"Why haven't they just killed me yet?" She asked. "Surly that would solve the whole problem."

"You underestimate yourself." He said and touched her cheek. "You're the East's flavour of the month. If the author of _'Western Wonders'_ were to suddenly disappear, questions would be raised in the North, East and even the South."

"Surly not."

"One of the reasons your still here. And why Meiling must have panicked when she saw you."

Sakura leaned in to almost kiss him. She felt bitter about losing this battle. Syaoran's own anger towards it, she wanted to be with him more and more. He wasn't denying it anymore, the military were wrong in what they were doing. It excited her he could see that.

But it also frightened her. He was so concerned about keeping her safe, Sakura had never stopped to wonder, was he safe? Was _she_ endangering _him_. As if that fear was about to come to life, Sakura placed a hand on his chest to feel he was still there. She swallowed a lump in her throat.

 _Don't die on me_ , she wanted to say. _I can't bear that thought…_

But their location prevented her from doing so. Instead, she grabbed her bag and left.

When things had calmed down, and her mind was refocused, she promised herself she'd let him know.

She'd let him know how she felt about him.

Because after today, who knows who end up being the next Rei Tachibana…

X x x

He handed the statement to be filed.

Syaoran needed to think of a way to handle this. Meiling was clever, she knew he'd be coming for her. And Mizuki was turning a blind, yet encouraging eye to this.

In his pocket his phone rang.

He assumed it would have something to do with damage control. He answered.

"Oh, Colonel Lieutenant, please tell me you've found something?" A woman sobbed down the phone.

Syaoran squinted, not recognizing the voice through the wailing.

He groaned to himself in annoyance. This was the absolute last thing he needed right now. Between rising tensions between the West and the events of today, Queen Sonomi and her runaway daughter were the last thing on his mind. As if he wasn't stretched thin enough.

"I'm sorry, your highness" He said. "I can't talk right now." He said in monotone.

"I was just hoping that maybe a search team could go into the west, undercover maybe? Anything to find my little girl-"

"I'm stretched thin at the moment." He said cutting her off harshly. "I really don't have time for this. I'm sorry. I'll let you know if I hear any update."

Queen Sonomi was silent. Syaoran had assumed he'd shocked her with the absence of patience he normally showed her. He had more important things to do now than console.

"B-but surly you could…I don't know…do something. Tomoyo must be so scared-"

"I don't have time to console you or lie to you!" Syaoran barked. His patience with her had run thin. "I do not have time for this. Maybe you should have thought twice before dumping her into a mental asylum. If she ran away, maybe she doesn't want to be found!"

Syaoran hung up. He doubt she'd call back anytime soon. Maybe there'd be backlash for that.

Right now, he had to protect Sakura.

Whether she wanted it or not.

X x x

Yue nodded. "I understand."

He placed the phone on his desk with shaky hands.

The shaking wasn't from fear, it was anger.

He walked over to the window and gazed down view of suburban Tomoeda. Behind it, Base lay in view. Yue eyes floated up to the ever-present wall which cut high through the hills.

He breathed.

One…two…three…

He snapped.

He flipped over his desk as if it weighed nothing at all. The expensive but sparse ornaments on it landed with an almighty crash on the floor which was barely drowned out by Yue's roars. He balled his fists and smashed his laptop onto the floor.

His secretary, Naoko burst into his office with a look of utter shock.

"S-sir, are you OK-"

"GET OUT!" He barked with a maddening look that snapped her mouth shut and froze her to the spot.

Naoko hesitated, wondering if this were a fucked-up dream where Yue showed emotions other than passiveness or silent brooding.

"GET THE FUCK OUT!" He roared again.

Naoko closed the door and walked away with wobbly knees. The whole office looked up from their desks with wide eyes. Yue barely raised his voice for anything. That's what made him so intimidating.

They mumbled to each other and resumed their work.

Yue paced around his office, running his hands furiously through his white hair.

Another innocent shot, another cover-up he'd have to do. So many lies and cover-ups he played his part in over the years. He had had enough. This would be his first murder cover-up.

He can't, he can't keep this up.

He was losing it.

Then he had a sudden epiphany.

He'd pack up and leave in the middle of the night. He'd cross the border, dump his car into a lake then spend a day walking. But not before ending his phony career with a bang. Yue was not just a CEO, he _was_ the media. He had been in deep cover for years and had been almost too good at it. He'd override the printers somehow. He'd print the truth. Who cares about photos and testimonies? He'd create enough chaos and speculation to would give him a head start in his escape.

Then, then he could finally be with Toya.

Yes. It was a rough plan. But he didn't care. The urge to leave this job and be with Toya was overriding the overall mission.

Yue's thinking was disturbed by the low vibrations of his other phone buzzing somewhere under the rubble of files under his desk. He threw himself over the direction of the buzzing and overturned the table.

Desperate hands felt their way around until he found it.

He answered it and awaited his voice.

"You heard?" Toya said.

Upon hearing his voice, Yue was immediately relieved of his panic.

"Yes," He breathed. "They want me to aid in covering it up." He whispered and glanced at the door to make sure no one was listening. "I can't do it Toya. I won't. I'm coming over to join you. I have a plan-"

"No, Yue." He said sternly.

Yue's heart fell.

"I need you to hang in there a bit longer."

Yue banged his head against the desk. He was so fed up. "Please don't ask me to do this. I want to over there, with you."

"You will be." Toya assured.

"When?" Yue asked in desperation.

"Soon." He answered. He always said that. He was saying that for years now.

"Yue, I need you to do something for me."

Yue hugged his knees against his chest. He wanted to refuse. He wanted to go along with his own plan. But as always, Yue was completely weak to Toya. Always was, always will be.

"Anything."

X x x

The last place Tomoyo expected to be, was back at the Hiirigazawa house.

But when Mrs Hiirigazawa scouted her out amongst the chaotic aftermath of Ruby's murder, she found it hard to say no. The whole things had taken a bad impact on Ruby. Mrs Hiirigazawa was out doing damage control, they needed someone to help Ruby.

"Thanks." Ruby mumble as Tomoyo buttoned up her sleeping gown.

Tomoyo simply nodded. There wasn't much talking happening around the Hiirigazawa house today or anywhere in the village. A heavy atmosphere had taken hold since Rei Tachibana was suddenly taken from them. Tomoyo blinked backed some tears and was annoyed with herself.

Why was she crying? She was fond of Rei, but she wasn't Rei's mother, or her father or her sister. Tomoyo's chest tightened. The memory had played in her mind constantly.

Ruby buried her head into her hand. Tomoyo moved to comfort her. They didn't speak of their previous fight. It was forgotten.

Downstairs Eriol and his mother were fighting again.

"You have to bring her to court!" His mother said over and over again without even listening to Eriol.

"Don't you think I want to? I can't, I wasn't there to witness what happened!"

"Eriol, there were over fifty witnesses there!"

"You know their accounts will be discredited. According to the laws only me and the other Upper council members can testify in the Base court. None of the others were there either! Meiling knows this, that's why she set it up so I wouldn't be there."

"And where were you Eriol?" She said with accusation in her voice.

That hurt. Eriol said nothing. There was nothing to say. He should have been sharper, should have suspected Meiling was up to no good. But he didn't.

Mrs Hiirigazawa pinched the bridge of her nose. A migraine was coming on. She grabbed her coat. "Eriol, the town meeting in two days is important. You know Toya has an agenda. He also has the support. You need to think hard about what you're going to do about it. Your old way of peaceful negotiations isn't going to work this time."

Eriol watched her leave. There was a decision to be made.

"I'm sorry." Ruby said upstairs to Tomoyo and sighed. "It's just…Rei was one of my first students. I've known her since she was five. She was such a lovely girl. Why her, out of all people to target?"

Tomoyo didn't reply. For someone who was so full of words, today she had none. She grabbed Ruby's pills and shook two out for her.

"No." Ruby said and placed a hand over Tomoyo's.

"But Ruby, you need them."

Ruby shook her head. "They numb the pain, but they're barely making me better. They're just prolonging what I have."

"Barely is better than not at all Ruby, please."

Ruby shook her head again. "Sometimes they work too well. I'm afraid they're beginning to make me fell nothing at all. I just want to feel something tonight. Please."

Tomoyo stood still with the pills in her hand. Ruby's words were eerily similar to that last conversation she had with Syaoran. At some point, a long time ago when she was the princess, Tomoyo also resented the pills that her mother forced on her.

Tomoyo nodded. "Ok." She said and placed the pills back into the bottle.

"Madison." Ruby crocked as she slipped into bed.

"Yes?"

"Thank you, for coming back. We need you. You're family now."

There was that _we_ business again. Tomoyo pushed negative thoughts from her mind. She didn't need them right now. She smiled tightly and squeezed Ruby's hand.

Tomoyo went downstairs, feeling light headed. She saw Eriol standing outside, his posture broken. She should leave him alone, but she didn't.

Eriol turned around when he heard the door open. Tomoyo welcomed the cool breeze. They locked eyes. After a second Eriol extended his arm towards her. She ran her arms around him, feeling the warmth and comfort in his body. She focused on his heartbeat, allowing it to distract her. He rested his cheek on her forehead and closed his eyes. For a moment he could untense. Tomoyo was neutral, that's what he needed right now.

He didn't need for and against arguments. He needed someone to stand with him and just be. Even just for a few moments to get his head straight.

"There was nothing you could have done." She whispered.

He released her a little and looked into her eyes. "There was-"

"No. There wasn't. She was determined to kill. I could see it in her eyes. There nothing and nobody who could have stopped her. This is not your fault." She said.

Eriol gulped down a lump in his throat and held her closer, not wanting to let her go.

Tomoyo wasn't saying it to make him feel better. She knew that nothing would stop Meiling. This was not his fault.

As the sun was fading, he kissed her softly and released her unwillingly. His work wasn't finished yet.

X x x

It was ten a.m. and Tomoyo was already working six hours.

The force was stretched so thinly between grieving families taking leave from work, town meeting setting up and of course, Rei's funeral. Someone had to keep going within the fields. Tomoyo had volunteered with a few others to carry over the shift work. She actually appreciated how quiet it was.

She unloaded the last box in the warehouse and wiped the sweat from her forehead.

She couldn't deny that a part of her was sad. She was supposed to meet up with Eriol tonight. But with everything going on, of course it was postponed. She felt bad for even thinking about it.

Tomoyo heard the warehouse door open and close. She swerved her head around but heard no movement. A small part of her hoped that maybe Eriol made time for her, though it was unlikely. She dusted her hands and almost skipped towards the entrance with anticipation before stopping dead in her tracks.

No, of course it wasn't Eriol. But she never expected to see him there.

Tomoyo's face dropped and she pulled her lips into a tight line.

"What are you doing here?" She asked.

Toya smiled tightly. For once he wasn't in that phony soldier's uniform.

"I've come to see you." He said slowly and tilted his head to the side.

Tomoyo shuddered. It suddenly became much colder in here. "I'm busy." She said and turned away, she didn't have the headspace for him right now.

"Oh," He said following her to the back of the warehouse. "This won't take too long."

Tomoyo bit her cheek and side eyed him. He could see he was intimidating her. Good.

"What do you want, Toya?" She asked annoyed and turned back towards the task she was doing before.

"I'm just here to collect my debt."

Tomoyo knitted her brows together and looked back at him. "Your…what?"

Toya smiled, glad she was listening. "Remember who found you, half dead after we saved you from that asylum?"

"You hardly saved me-"

"And who got you that comfy little maids job? Well, I'm just here to give you an opportunity to repay me."

Tomoyo snorted and turned to face him. She crossed her arms, matching him. "Well I am just flattered." She said sarcastically and then with a sweet smile she beamed, "But you and your opportunity can take a long walk of a short bridge." She smiled sweetly and brushed past him.

Tomoyo replayed that conversation in her head as she made her way towards the warehouse front door and it made her laugh. As if she'd do anything for Toya. Ridiculous.

She didn't expect Toya's hand to clamp down on the back of her necks and thrust her against the concrete wall.

Tomoyo heard a crunch sound and hit the floor before she could even realize what had happened. All too quickly her mouth began to fill with blood followed by a sharp pain. She looked up at him with her split lip in horror. Blood spilled over her hand.

Toya rubbed his hands together with a neutral face. Warming up do some more damage.

"You know, Madison, this act you have up used to be amusing. But now, now I'm a little fed up with it." His voice was calm, deceptively so. He cracked his knuckled and walked towards her. Tomoyo pulled herself up and leaned against the hard wall for support.

"I think you're ready to talk now." He said.

Tomoyo spat out the blood from her mouth. "Go to hell."

Toya smiled and laughed. "You're making this too much fun." He launched his fist at her cheek and knocked her to the ground again. Tomoyo thought she'd black out but she didn't. Everything was spinning, she held onto the ground to keep steady. Her vision was coming back and the sight of Toya petrified her. His threats had no longer become empty.

Her knees were shaking.

"You really are something, Madison. Or, whoever you really are."

Tomoyo froze.

"Oh, do I have your attention now?" He asked and grinned. Tomoyo sat back and wiped the blood spilling from her split lip. He whole face burned with promises of bruising to come. Toya saw fear in her eyes, good, that's the spot he wanted to hit.

Toya knelt in front or her and produced a slip of paper. Tomoyo's eyes struggled to focus on it but when they did, she felt sick to her core.

"You know who this is, right?" He purred.

Tomoyo swallowed. She blinked as if the picture of the girl in front of her would change.

"No? Well I'll explain. This," He said pointing at the picture of the girl. "this is Madison Taylor. Coincidence maybe. Yet you two have a lot in common. This girl also went to Tomoedan asylum. You two have the exact same backgrounds. One thing is different though. This girl is dead."

Tomoyo said nothing. She was lost for words. Tomoyo's stomach turned as she took in the frightening familiar features of the real Madison Taylor.

"And then, poof. You magically appear with the same back story, name and well…everything else."

Tomoyo's nerve wavered. He had her in a corner and Tomoyo couldn't charm nor argue her way out of this one. "What do you want from me?" She said meekly.

"That's much better." He grinned and shuffled close to her. She recoiled back but was caught between him and the wall. Then his eyes turned dark as he took her bloodied and beaten face into his palm harshly. "You are going to do something very special for me."

Tomoyo struggled against his grip. "What could I possibly do for you? I don't know anything about anything."

"It's very simple, dear Madion. Even you can do this. Tomorrow at the village council meeting, I'm going to make a motion. Eriol will most likely try to oppose me. Convince him not to."

Tomoyo sat silently trying to understand what he was saying. Then she laughed.

"You over-estimate my abilities." She sneered. "As if I'd be able to convince Eriol of anything, let alone something like that."

Toya grinned, unfazed. "Well you did convince him to cheat on his wife. If anyone can do this, you can."

Tomoyo's sneer disappeared.

"Oh yes, I saw you two. Right here, in this warehouse. He seems pretty smitten with you."

Tomoyo began to shake her head. This can't be happening. So they were caught.

"Personally, I don't care about who he screws. Kinda feel sorry for that sick wife of his though. So, if you want to keep this little infidelity to yourself, I'd do as I say." He warned.

"Fuck you." Tomoyo said. "I'll deny it."

Toya laughed. Then grabbed her by the throat and pressed her against the wall. She could barely breath. His face came so close to hers, she could see the tiny reddened veins in his eyes. "I don't think you understand, _Madison_. It took me a very short time to find out about the real Madison Taylor. It won't take me but a few days to find out your real identity."

"Why bother?" She spluttered under his grip. "I'm a nobody."

"I would have thought so too. But someone who goes to extreme lengths to hide their identity, must have something serious to hide. I mean, taking a dead girls identity, that's pretty fucked up, even for me. Tell me, did you kill her and take identity or are you actually crazy?"

Tomoyo's heart pounded. What if Toya meant it? What would Ruby say? It could kill her. She didn't know if Toya really had the means or resources to find out who she really was, but could she risk it? If everyone knew she was the princess…if Eriol knew… She began to shake. They'd kill her. But the thoughts of tricking Eriol to do something like that…she couldn't. She couldn't manipulate him, she didn't want to…It was something she use to a professional at. Lying, manipulation, that was the work of princess Tomoyo. But she wasn't a princess anymore and she didn't want to resort to that life again. The thoughts of tricking Eriol…she just couldn't…

But could she risk the consequence of denying Toya?

"Do we have an understanding?"

Tomoyo blinked back tears and forced herself to nod. He released her. She grabbed her throat and struggled to swallow the air.

"I don't think I can convince him of what you're asking for." She said weakly, tears on the verge of falling.

Toya straightened up. "Maybe you can't. But you have too much at stake here to not try your best, wouldn't you say?"

Tomoyo coughed and rubbed her sore throat. "What do you need him to agree on? What could be so important?"

"None of your concern, just do your job." She said passively and patter down his clothes.

He opened the door. Toya peered out. It was sure to rain today.

Before stepping out he cast his eye back to Tomoyo, who was nursing her damaged face.

"I knew I'd find use for you."

When the echo rang out Tomoyo cradled herself and sobbed quietly.

 _Think quick, Tomoyo_. She told herself. _Think quick…_

X x x

She fluttered his neck with tiny kisses which aroused him.

"Stop," He whispered with an amused smile. "We don't have time."

She pressed her nose against his naked shoulder and he pulled her into him. Despite her nakedness under a flimsy blanket, she wasn't cold next to Eriol. He seemed to be a constant source of heat.

"Just one more time." She teased and kissed him.

With all his will power, he stopped her and rolled her onto her back. He lay on top of her for another minute, taking in her features.

"What are you staring at?" she asked and traced her finger over his strong jawline.

He said nothing. It was moments like this when he knew why he kept going back to her. It was amazing that amongst all the chaos recently, they still squeezed in a small amount of time for each other. It was selfish, but it was addictive.

His finger grazed her swollen lip lightly. She winced and he moved his fingers onto her puffy cheek. He kissed it so lightly she barely felt it.

"A barrel?" He asked again with suspicion.

Tomoyo nodded and pushed away images of Toya and his violent streak. "I told you, I wasn't looking while offloading the stock. I caught it wrong."

"You caught it with your face?" He raised his eyebrow at Tomoyo's explanation. The cuts and puffiness of her cheeks were more obvious today. Tomoyo's lies were keeping Eriol at bay for the moment.

"I should have been there to help you, or at least sent someone."

"I'm fine." She said with a small smile. Any wonder and her lip would split again.

"I have to go." He said and gently rolled from her and began to dress himself.

Tomoyo sighed and watched him. Her smile soon faded when she realized what she forced to do. She sat up and ignored the knot in her stomach.

"Are you preparing for the council meeting?" She asked, trying to keep her voice steady.

He nodded, it was weighing him down. He knew Toya would come with an agenda. Eriol just didn't know what. Eriol's mind had bounced back and forth. After Rei's funeral he was filled with anger and self-doubt. Had he brought this on them all? Was his peaceful strategy that wrong route? As much as it killed him to admit, perhaps there were elements of what Toya was saying that weren't wrong.

But were they really ready for violence?

"Toya will speak at it?"

Again, Eriol nodded.

She tried to act natural, which was difficult considering she'd made a conscious effort to stay under the radar and keep out of politics. She was afraid she'd arouse suspicion.

"What will you say?" She whispered.

Eriol sighed. "I don't know. I don't know what I'll do."

Something told Tomoyo to drop it there and then. Eriol seemed to be battling his own demons about this, she was just adding to his confusion. But she'd lose him, Toya was adamant about that.

She gathered the blanket around her and forced her way onto his lap. He was surprised at this eagerness.

She smiled the sweet sickening smile she hated. She caressed his face in her hands and traced his lip with her thumb. "Why don't you just agree with him? Or at least hear him out? You both want the same things." She whispered like a serpent. With each statement she planted a small tender kiss to make light of her words, meanwhile planting seeds of doubt in his mind.

She wanted to stop. This felt wrong, no matter how she tried to justify it to herself.

"Wouldn't it be easier to be on the same side instead of against each other?" She forced him to look at her. "The divide between you two is no good for anyone. Don't you think so?"

His face was unreadable. Then finally, he cracked.

"…Maybe." He said. He was so tired of standing his ground against Toya. He was crumbling. He hadn't the strength to resist him for much longer. But…Toya was unstable. "I've to go." He said and got up quickly. Tomoyo knew she'd upset him.

He began to dress even quicker now. Was that it? Did she get him to cave? She almost celebrated in her mind. She was safe. And in saving herself, she was also saving Ruby the pain of finding out, and she wouldn't lose Eriol and-

…

….

…no. She knew that wasn't right.

Suddenly she could see Sakura in her mind. Head tilted, eyebrow raised with slanted green eyes which told her to cop on and stop lying to herself.

Tomoyo sighed. She was saving no one. No one but herself. Because the issues of tonight were so much bigger than her, bigger than an affair. The action taken tonight would affect the whole village. The West, in general. She bit her lip. She knew what damages would follow if she didn't do what Toya asked.

Tomoyo played the scene out in her mind. She'd apologise to Ruby before Toya would relay the cold, heartless truth to her. She'd apologize to Eriol for lying about lying. And hopefully, she'd get out of Tomoeda before Toya stuck to his word and found out about her royal status. Even if Toya worked relentlessly, Tomoyo doubted he could truly find out her true identity.

But she couldn't take lying to Eriol anymore. If she had to give up being Madison Taylor, then she'd give up the charade.

She'd lose Eriol either way. But she never really deserved him anyway.

She sighed. Toya's threats frightened her, but in an act of rare selfishness, Tomoyo thought past herself.

"Eriol, wait." She said sheepishly.

He stalled and looked down at her.

She bit her lip, knowing that she could lose him by doing this.

"Don't listen to me. No one knows this village more than you. Whatever happens tonight, no one knows what's right but you. Toya, he…he's a bastard. An unstable, unhinged bastard. Don't listen to him or anyone else." She prayed that undid her words.

She clutched the sheet around her and said what she thought could undo her mistake.

But his expression did not change. He was unreadable. He casted his eyes downwards, deep in thought. He closed the door.

Whatever side he chose tonight, it would determine her future as well as everyone elses.

X x x

Tomoyo could barely squeeze through the thick crowd in the council hall.

It seemed every villager was present, waiting with anticipation to see their options laid out to them.

Tomoyo looked around for a seat but found none. Over the rambling crown she heard someone call her. Ruby was in the front row and indicated to the saved seat beside her.

"I can't believe so many people turned up."

"I know." Ruby nodded. "It's never been this packed. But since Rei's murder, everyone is antsy about the future." Ruby looked over to her husband who sat on one side of the room. He looked so tired.

On the other side, Toya stood confidently looking out at his supporters, who had grown significantly since Ri's funeral. But Eriol still had considerable support. Loyal followers who would follow Eriol into peace, or war, or the grave. Toya's eyes landed on Tomoyo.

Her blood froze. She wondered how quickly he'd tear her down once he realized she didn't keep up her end of the bargain.

The council president slammed a thick book three times to grab everyone's attention. Everyone hushed and sat down.

The council president spoke. "First, I'd like to address the tragic loss of a cherished community member, Tachibana Rei. Indeed, we are all saddened by her-"

"She was murdered!" Someone roared from the back. "Blood for blood!" He shouted which gather a cluster of cheers.

Eriol watched them and felt a heavy weight plague him. He knew across the room, Toya was bathing in his own success. His support outnumbered Eriol's.

The council president cleared his throat once they calmed down. "Tonight, we will hear from various council members about a strategy to move forward. Mr Kinomoto," He said turning to Toya with slight distain in his voice. "I believe you have a motion you'd like to express."

When Toya took the floor, there was a tremendous applause. Ruby rolled her eyes and rubbed her forehead.

"My motion is simple." Toya opened with confidence. "Blood was spilt on our land."

" _our land_." Ruby mumbled and tutted.

"It was a heinous, unprovoked attack. I cannot stand by and watch it go unpunished. Tonight, certain council members," He said and glanced over at Eriol. "will try to convince you that this attack, although vicious and unjust, should not be met with violent means. I say, that's a coward's strategy."

"Blood for blood!" Someone began to chant again.

"Silence!" The council president barked.

"I propose a retaliation to the scale that Base will not see coming. We have an army, although small, we can get a very clear message to all Tomoeda. The West is fighting back!"

Again, cheers and applause.

The council president tried to remain neutral though the thick vein throbbing in his forehead as he listened to Toya gave him away. "I appreciate your passion, Mr. Kinomoto, but do you honestly think an attack on Base would wield any success? They have armoury beyond our imagination."

"We won't attack Base." He said which aroused everyone's curiosity. "They will expect that. I am no fool. We simply cannot win against Base's army. Not yet." Toya paused and looked out in glee at the attention he was holding. He waited for his words to settle onto everyone's ears before he delivered he statement that no one expected to follow. "Next week, the Tomoedan Peace Ball will take place in North Tomoeda at the Palace. Their security will be high, but not unbreakable."

Tomoyo's blood ran cold.

"We need to send a message that all of Tomoeda will receive. They have swept us under the carpet, ignored us for years. So, we need to give them something they cannot ignore."

The president shifted uncomfortably. "And what message is that?"

Toya smirked which drained the colour from her face. She just knew whatever Toya was going to say, it would be devastating.

"We kill the royals."

There was a wave of gasps. Some of them, upon realizing the gravity of what Toya was suggesting, began to like the idea all too quickly. "Down with the monarch! Kill them!"

"Silence!" The president bellowed and turned to Toya. "A-are you serious? You want to kill the royal family? They were not involved in any of this-"

"The monarch area representation of Tomoeda's values and beliefs. They claim to represent the carrying out of justice and yet, for decades have turned a blind eye to the atrocities that have happened to us. Where were they when Rei was murdered? What are they doing about it? Nothing! This strategy is something that even the Military cannot cover up. It's what we need, and not what they expect. We need to shake this country. It needs a rude awakening. It needs to know the West will not hide in fear anymore! First, the royals, then the military!"

"How the hell are you going to do that? You'll be shot dead at the door!"

"We have someone on our side who defected from the west to the north years ago. She works closely with the royal family and is just waiting for our command. We will attack from outside the palace walls and lure the military there. The family will retreat to the palace, and that's when she'll strike."

"And who is this person?" The council president asked.

"She was Nakono Ayane. But in the North, she simply goes by 'Layla'."

Tomoyo thought her heart went dead. No. No, no, no, no, no. Her family. They were going to wipe out her family. H-how could this be? They can't go along with this.

"My God." Ruby gasped. "That's crazy."

Layla.

Tomoyo never suspected that the woman who served under her for so many years. Gave her lessons, taught her how to sow, cooked for her, dressed her, brushed her hair…that at any moment she could turn on them all.

They can't do this, it was crazy. Someone had to object. This is what Toya was so desperate for her to convince Eriol of.

 _That's it!_ She thought. _Eriol_. He'd never go along with something like this. She scanned the hall for him and found him. His face betrayed nothing.

 _Please, Eriol. Please, no. Object! Object!_

"A very…unexpected motion you have delivered tonight. But before you go even further…" The president shifted uneasily. He turned towards Eriol.

"Mr. Hiirigazawa, I am sure you have an objection to this? Surly?" There was desperation in his voice.

Tomoyo placed a hand over her mouth. She felt sick that she may have influenced in any way. Please God, please say that she undid her damage. Don't let her family pay for her actions.

Very slowly, Eriol stood up.

Everyone held their breath. The decision now sat heavily on his shoulders. Do they sit tight, carry on with their lives and pray things get better, or go extreme and rattle Tomoeda in ways it couldn't conceive. Eriol's eyes casted towards the spectators who were awaiting his reply. And for a split second, he made eye contact with Tomoyo. Just for a second.

Her breath became stuck in her throat. Had she the ability to move, she would have shaken her head. Begged him not to say yes.

Finally, he parted his lips and spoke.

"I have no objection to this."

X x x

Tomoyo pushed hard through the crowd.

She needed air, she needed it bad.

She burst through the hall doors and vomited into a nearby bush. Her hands shook tremendously.

What has she done? Did she just sign her family's death warrant? Did she influence Eriol's decision?

Was it her last conversation that planted that seed of doubt in his mind? Was he thinking of doing this anyway? Had she been the one to push him towards this decision? Or was he already resigned to do this?

"Good work," She heard from behind her.

Toya strolled up to her, not even asking about the vomit in front of her. "I knew you wouldn't let me

down, Madison. I don't know what you said, but it must have worked."

He strolled past her. He was done with her now. Tomoyo had served her purpose.

Tomoyo hugged her knees, too shocked to even cry.

Her mother, father….Davy….

They were going to die. And it might be her fault.

No, no, no…Tomoyo clawed at her hair and rocked herself as if that would help.

No, she had to think of something. She wouldn't let this happen. She'd save her family. She had to…

 _Think quick, Tomoyo…think quick…_

X x x

 **There are a lot of TomoyoxEriol here and not a lot of SxS (sorry!) . I'm itching to start writing my next chapter because it will have only**

 **SxS scenes!**

 **Thank you again for your reviews!**

 **I'm getting all Christmassy now and work finishes for the year next week so hopefully it'll be writing, writing and more writing!**


	19. Mah Lahn' Fey

**Hope you all had a good Christmas and a happy new year!**

 **I went travelling around for a bit but now I'm back and doing more writing. Just to let you know before you read, this is a bit of a**

 **fluff chapter so there won't be a lot (or any) drama really.**

 **Enjoy!**

Syaoran's eyes fluttered open.

He stared at the white wall of a room that wasn't his.

He turned under the pink sheets which were oddly girly for her. His hand searched for the soft curve

on her waist. Sakura's back was turned to him and she slept noiselessly.

Syaoran was glad she was sleeping soundly. Rei's murder was causing a disturbance in her sleeping

pattern. She often tossed and turned, struggling to get through a few hours of uninterrupted sleep. The dark circles under her eyes were

finally beginning to fade.

Syaoran sunk his face into the pillow and breathed out slowly. This was a particularly special morning for him. For them. It was unheard of for Syaoran to have a complete day off to himself. There was always something to do at Base, something or someone always brought him back to his duties as a soldier. But today he had the whole day to himself. He didn't remember the last time he was this free.

He slid over to her side of the bed and kissed her shoulder. He was careful not to wake her. She needed her sleep. However, she stirred and rolled onto her back. She peeled her eyelids to make out his blurry face.

"You're still here." She mumbled more as a statement than an accusation.

Syaoran chuckled. "Is that a complaint?"

She responded by wrapping her limbs around as much of him as possible. No, she definitely didn't want him to leave. Her fingers began their usual ritual of gazing the soft hairs at the nape of his neck.

"What time is it?" She asked sleepily.

Syaoran strained his neck read the clock above the bed. "Nine thirty."

"Nine thirty?"

"Yep."

"And you have the whole day off?"

"Yep."

"You could stay here all day."

"I could."

Sakura grinned and rubbed her tired eye. "We could have sex all day."

"We could," He said with his lips pressed against her forehead. "But I'd get pretty tired eventually."

"Oh, that's true. We could sleep and eat in between?" She suggested

"That sounds like the perfect day. Are you going to cook?"

Sakura scowled and shook her head. "I don't cook."

"I see…I guess I'll do all the cooking and you do what you do best."

"Which is…?" She with a smirk.

"Everything."

She smiled and felt the weight of tiredness call her back to sleep. She mumbled something in Mahr Brethain, something she only did when she was tired or frustrated. He secretly loved those moments when English failed her, an adorable trait she held. That, and when she confuses words such as 'poisoned' and 'positioned', or when she was sleepy and filled in the gaps of her conversation with Mahr Brethain, forcing Syaoran to play a guessing game.

In rare moments, she taught him how to read her language. He was fascinated by it but far from talented at it. But nevertheless, it was a small insight into her world. His willingness to try understand her world made her love him more.

They were surrendering back into sweet sleep until a noise outside disrupted them. At first, they didn't stir, the sound passed. Then, there was the unmistakable sound of a car door shut from outside the window. They both bolted upright and stared at each other in slight panic. Sakura leaped past him and scurried over to the window. She peeled the curtain back with her index finger and glanced down at her driveway.

To her horror, Fujitaka's car sat in the driveway and just behind it, her father himself unloaded groceries from the boot of the car. He was whistling and swinging his keys in his hand, oblivious to the blind panic he was stirring inside his home.

"Shit!" She muttered and backed away from the window. "it's my dad."

Syaoran sprung from the bed and made a mad dash to swoop his clothes up from the floor. "I thought he wasn't coming back until tomorrow evening!"

"He wasn't. He must have finished up early." She said and threw on her dressing gown.

In Syaoran's panic, he buttoned up his shirt wrong and had to start over. Something they would have found amusing if it were not for their current scenario.

"Sakura," They heard Fujitaka call from downstairs.

"No time!" Sakura said and dumped his boots into his arms and pushed him towards the window.

"Are you serious?" He said as she undid the latch on her window.

"I know, I'm sorry." She said with an apologetic look. "Use the wooden frame outside as a ladder. Don't get caught."

Syaoran dangled a led out the window and tried to ignore the ridiculousness of it all.

"Sorry again," She whispered and kissed him.

He kissed her back and she responded by automatically wrapping her arms around his neck and pulling him back through the window, not quite ready for him to leave yet. She pressed her upper body against his and before they knew it Syaoran was coming back through the window. His hands began hungrily tugging her t-shirt off and she almost let him only for the unmistakable sounds of her father's footsteps ascending he stairs.

There was no time for Syaoran to escape through the window. A light knock on her door froze them both for a split second before Sakura pushed Syaoran behind the door and gestured for his to stay silent.

Sakura opened the door, concealing Syaoran on the other side of it. Fujitaka looked surprised as the door flung open and his daughter stood there with a wide but flustered smile.

"Oh good," He said and adjusted his glasses. "You're awake. Not like you to sleep in."

"Dad," She said a little too high pitched. "I didn't think you were coming back so soon!"

"Yeah, we finished up early. Guess what?" He said with some excitement.

"What?" She said and shuffled from foot to foot trying not to glance at Syaoran who was trying his best to stay silent and clutching his clothes to his chest for dear life.

"I stopped by that bakery store up by the Northern border. You know the one with the old sign outside? The one with the-"

"Oh yeah I know uh huh." She said with her smile twitching.

"Well, they're apparently going out of business. They were having a fifty per cent off sale on everything, can you believe that? So, I got some muffins and those pancakes that you and Toya use to adore when you were so small. I actually thought they stopped making them. I almost drove right by it but-"

"But you didn't and you bought it." She said finishing for him. Sakura tried to keep her voice even and natural but with every passing second Syaoran's nerves seemed to be transferring onto her.

"Exactly!" Fujitaka said and clapped his hands together. "I hope you're hungry."

"Yeah dad. Starving. I'll come down straight after my shower." She said with a tight smile. Her words were coming out suspiciously quick.

Syaoran was being good at staying still but now his fingers were getting twitchy.

"Ok, take your time." Fukitaka said and finally backed away from the door and began to whistle again. Only when he got to the landing of the stairs did he wonder if Sakura was a little off this morning. He waved it off, maybe he was just imagining it.

When Sakura closed the door Syaoran finally breathed a sigh of relief.

"You're hard as nails in Base interrogations but with your father you barely hold up." He teased and put the rest of his clothes on.

Sakura slapped his shoulder playfully and buttoned up his shirt. "I did as well as I could."

A sad look crossed her face.

"What's wrong?" He asked and brushed her fringe from her eyes.

She shook her head. "Nothing. I just…I just thought we'd have the day together." She said wishfully. Their time together had been only short periods recently. Since Rei's murder, both sides of the South-West wall have been manic.

Syaoran's work was keeping him in the South a majority of the time and Sakura was denied access into the West until it was all cleared up. Yue had been impossible to reach lately. He wouldn't answer her calls and was never in the office. This worried her more than she wanted it to. Sakura had been feverishly digesting Nathala's diary and writing up her own witness account into her own diary.

But in the times when she wasn't obsessing about the walls, she thought about Syaoran and wondered if their 'relationship' was ever going to get back onto its dysfunctional track.

Syaoran kissed her forehead and inhaled her scent. "I know. Me too. We will, some day." He said, even though he had no idea when. Being here was risky for Syaoran, but if he didn't steal these small moments or pockets of time with her, he'd go crazy and lose sight of why he was doing anything.

A moment longer was all they wanted but they knew they shouldn't stall any longer.

After a final goodbye, Syaoran disappeared through the window.

X x x

Syaoran clambered down from the second floor and his boots landed onto the garden with an ungraceful thump.

It was strange for him not to be leaving her house in his soldier's uniform for once. But it would make it easier for him to blend into the general public. With a grin he made his way to the side of her house with plans to escape undetected through the side gate.

He expected most people to be sleeping in or only rising to have breakfast now. What Syaoran most certainly did not expect, was to almost was head first into Fujitaka.

They both recoiled a step back in shock when they saw each other, neither of them expecting that. Fujitaka raised his eyebrows and blinked twice to check if his eyesight was not fooling him.

Syaoran's lips parted to say something but in the suddenness of it all, words failed to form.

"Lieutenant Colonel." Fujitaka tried to say in a smooth and even voice, but the surprise was obvious.

Syaoran saluted awkwardly. "Kinomoto-san. I-I'm…" Syaoran's mind went blank, unable to think of a good excuse. If this were anyone else he would have moved on, unfazed by it. But it was Sakura's father and the strange urge to have a good impression was making him stall and stutter.

"I'm…doing surveillance and security watch for this area and…and…" Syaoran's excuses were unable to keep up with themselves. If Syaoran was actually wearing his uniform perhaps there was a chance that Fujitaka would believe him.

Fujitaka adjusted his glasses and glanced behind Syaoran to where a few flowers had been broken off and scattered. The aftermath of Syaoran's descending from the second floor.

That, and the look of guilt in Syaoran's eye had made it all clear to Fujitaka. He wasn't imagining Sakura's unusual rushed behaviour this morning. Fujitaka sighed inwardly and looked at the man who had probably just did a runner from his daughter's bedroom. Fujitaka wondered how disappointed Sakura was when her old fart of a father returned home to disrupt time with her…with her…Fujitaka didn't know what to call Syaoran.

Then, Fujitaka forced his face to soften at the nervous young man. "I see. You must have had an early start this morning to get to all these houses."

"Y-yes sir. I was just leaving now." Syaoran mumbled embarrassed and hoped to make a quick getaway before he made things worse. Sakura would kill him.

Syaoran didn't know if Fujitaka had caught on yet, but the oddly calming look in his eyes suggested otherwise.

"Nonsense!" Fujitaka said and pushed his glasses back up the bridge of his nose with a kind smile. "You've been working all morning. Come join us for breakfast. I've bought far more than I needed. Here, take this." He said and plonked a grocery bag into Syaoran's arms.

Syaoran began to stutter for an excuse. "Thank you, sir, but I honestly don't want to disturb-"

"Not at all." Fujitaka said and waved off the matter. He walked past Syaoran and signalled for him to follow.

Syaoran's feet felt like blocks of ice as he fought with himself on what to do.

"My daughter will be surprised to see you." Fujitaka called over his shoulder. "It's been such a long time since you two have seen each other, hasn't it?"

Syaoran thought he was imagining the slight humour in Fujitaka's voice.

X x x

Sakura felt fresher and more alert after a quick shower.

She laughed lightly to herself at the thought of Syaoran clambering out of the window. Hiding boyfriends from her father seemed so…high schoolish. But the bizarreness of it all made her feel light, which was a welcomed contrast from the anger and frustration she was feeling since her last encounter with the west.

She dried her hair and changed into a forest green shirt and trousers. The weather was taking a frosty turn but despite that, the sun was trying its hardest to beam down on Tomoeda.

As she reached the bottom of the stairs she could hear her father outside speaking to someone. She wondered if Ms. Walkins was being her usual nosy self and attempting to extract info from Fujitaka. Sakura picked up a cup and boiled the kettle. The front door opened and she could hear her father on the other side.

She turned her head around and squinted to see who he was talking to. Neighbours never usually came into the house. It was odd he invited someone in. But Sakura never imagined in her wildest dreams that Syaoran would be there.

Sakura nearly lost her grip on her cup when she saw Syaoran there behind her father carrying a grocery bag as if it were a usual morning routine.

"Ah, Sakura. I invited the Lieutenant Colonel for breakfast. He's been working all morning." Fujitaka said and placed the grocery bag on the kitchen counter.

Sakura clenched her jaw in shock and she saw Syaoran shuffle, also looking uncomfortable.

"Ms Kinomoto." Syaoran said and gulped.

Sakura mind went blank. Why was he here? Did he get caught?

Fujitaka glanced up when Sakura didn't respond.

"Lieutenant Colonel." She mumbled and half bowed.

It was so strange for them both to act like this, like they weren't lovers.

"Lieutenant Colonel, would you anything to drink?" Fujitaka said casually, oblivious to the strange interaction between them.

"Call me Syaoran, please. Any just water, thanks."

When Fujitaka's back was turned Sakura's green eyes stabbed themselves on him.

' _Why are you here?'_ She mouthed.

Syaoran outstretched his hands helplessly. _'I'm sorry. He saw me!'_

 _'_ _How did you get caught?'_

Syaoran squinted, no longer able to lip read this silent conversation. He looked at her with apologies and shrugged. He knew she'd be mad. But to his surprise, her eyes softened. She smiled softly and nodded as she looked from him towards her father, who was already in his apron and oddly unaffected by Syaoran's presence.

She poured tea into a cup and handed it to him. He took it from her hands but her fingers lingered and stroked the back of his hand lovingly. Syaoran's eyes flickered from hers to Fujitaka, who still had his back to them and was recalling out loud about where to get the freshest fish in Eastern Tomoeda.

Sakura's lips parted. This situation was not what she wanted but…something about him being here, out of his uniform, meeting her father on a Sunday… it was nice. She wanted to linger her hands a moment longer but chose to go back to helping her father.

Sakura found it odd to set three dinner mats at the table. With just the addition of Syaoran it the table felt livelier…fuller. Sakura and Syaoran's awkward interactions began to fade and became more natural around Fujitaka, although they were aware of their limitations. Sakura opted to refer to him as Mr. Li.

Sakura cleared the table and stepped upstairs for just a moment. By the time she came back Syaoran was laughing at something her father was saying. No, not saying, showing.

"What are you doing?" She asked curiously when she re-emerged back into the kitchen.

"Your father was just showing me the family photo album." Syaoran said unable to keep his face neutral.

Sakura's face dropped. "No," She said feeling her face go crimson when she looked down and saw her baby pictures sprawled out on the table. "Dad?" She said wide-eyed and covered her face with embarrassment.

"Oh, don't be embarrassed. It's nice to finally show someone the family photos." Fujitaka chuckled. "We both agree that you were adorable."

"Dad, I'm sure Mr. Li is just being polite. I don't think he wants to see my baby pictures-"

"Actually, I'm finding them very entertaining." He said trying to mask his grin.

Sakura would definitely punish him for this later. Her own face was struggling not to laugh in embarrassment. Not because she found it humorous, but it was so not how she thought this day would go.

"Now this one is my favourite." Fujitaka said handing Syaoran a picture of Sakura no more than four years old. Her eyes were huge and sparkling green and she had the widest smile he'd ever seen. She was holding a small pale pink blanket in one hand and a book in the other. Syaoran couldn't read the Mahr Brethain on the cover, but Sakura was clutching it close to her chest.

"She smiled like that all the time back then." Fujitaka said closing his eyes and picturing it. "Before she became all serious." Sakura sipped her tea and rolled her eyes.

"Sometimes I'm not serious." She joked.

"I know." He said and patted her on the head. He went behind the counter. "You've been very smiley recently, wouldn't you say, Mr Li?" Fujitaka called behind the counter and chuckled. Did Fujitaka make a dig?...Does he know…?

Sakura shook her head. No. No way he knows.

Both Sakura and Syaoran looked at each other. Fujitaka's comment was strange but Sakura shrug it off.

"If you say so, Mr Kinotmoto." Syaoran replied, not knowing how to answer.

"Do you keep up with the Tomoedan Mirror, Mr Li? Sakura's been writing articles in there." He said beaming with pride.

"Yes sir, read every one of them."

Sakura shuffled in her seat, not liking the focus of the conversation being on her. Fujitaka rattled on about Sakura and how proud he was. He was interrupted when Sakura gasped. Fujitaka poked his head back around.

"Are you ok, Sakura?"

Sakura smiled tightly and nodded. She felt Syaoran's hand rest on her inner thigh. She swatted it away and he smirked, keeping his eyes on the paper as if nothing were happening.

Fujitaka's head disappeared behind the cabinet again and he continued to gush about Sakura.

His hand returned to her knee and caresses her leg lovingly, but almost lustfully and travelled upwards towards her panty line.

 _"_ _Stop."_ She whispered but ended up smiling.

She tried to move his hand but it wouldn't budge. The touch was caring and she wanted nothing more than to crawl onto his lap and let him embrace her and kiss his neck. But they had to be civil, appropriate even. She for now she placed her hand over his. He turned his palm upwards and interlocked his fingers in with hers under the table, where it was secret.

Fujitaka's voice hummed on as Sakura and Syaoran's eyes met. She hid her cute smile behind her fist. Syaoran wanted to reach up and move her hand but kept himself restrained. It wasn't lust, it was pure affection they wanted to express.

 _"_ _I love you."_ He mothed to her.

She nodded subtly. _"I know."_ She replied.

"Smoke?" Fujitaka said suddenly re-emerging from behind the counter.

Their hands broke away from each other and Sakura excused herself to finish the dishes.

X x x

Sakura watched them through the kitchen window.

Her father and her lover sat outside on the small patio smoking a cigar each. Sakura felt apologetic that Syaoran had to endure this. But to her surprise, Syaoran took him up on his offer and didn't seem to be under any sort of pressure to relax. Her father had probably wanted to smoke those old cigars with someone for years. But Sakura wondered why he broke them out with Syaoran and not Fujitaka's own friends.

She saw Syaoran said something that made her father toss his head back and laugh lightly. It was only four o'clock and the day was already turning dark. She could make out the cigars burning like fireflies.

Sakura thought it was strange that they got on so well. A stranger would probably figure them as father and son. Sakura's hands froze and she looked down at the plate she was washing.

No, those weren't the father and son images that she had experienced. The relationship between her father and Toya was volatile in their last few months. The arguments, the walking out, the hours of wondering if Toya was going to ever come home… Although Sakura was much too young to recall the cause of their arguments, she knew that Toya and her father would never be able to sit outside and enjoy a cigar together.

She shook her head. She didn't want to think about that now. She didn't want to think about Toya or what she'd have to say to him the next time they'd meet. It was something she was putting off. The last encounter she had with Toya had left her shaking with fear.

Laughter outside brought her back to the present.

She smiled. Something Toya said did resonate with her. What if there were no walls in Tomoeda, ever? Would this be what it would be like? Syaoran and her would no longer be secret. Syaoran could come over and sit and eat with them. Then maybe after, they would go somewhere hand in hand. They wouldn't have to walk with a distance between them, they wouldn't have to pretend they didn't know each other. He could touch her when he wanted to and her him.

He could be her lover, her equal. They could live together in a place that was not restricted to a zone. North, South, East or West. There would be no element of fear of being caught, no more worrying about the consequences, no more Nathala's diary or Base or revolution or choosing sides.

And Toya would come home and he and Fujitaka would have that father-son relationship they had lost. Toya would not see Syaoran as a threat. She imagined they'd meet and see why she loved them both so much. They'd get along and laugh and smile, even her.

 _Without the walls, I wouldn't have to lie to him anymore…_ she thought.

Without walls, maybe Sakura could finally tell Syaoran how much she loved him without tormenting herself about if- no, _when_ it all came crashing down.

Was Toya right? Could a Tomoeda without the walls actually exist? Sakura's bowed her head.

She didn't know the answer. All she knew was, the road to a united Tomoeda would be bloody.

Perhaps it was not something she should hope for.

X x x

Syaoran felt nervous to be left alone with Fujitaka.

He took him up on his offer to have a cigar for fear of seeming rude. As they sat down on the outside patio Syaoran noticed how seemingly peaceful it was in this part of Tomoeda. In his own apartment just off Base, Syaoran was well use to the rumbling of nearby tanks, gunshots from drills and everything else in between. But here in the East there was an essence of tranquillity that Syaoran never had before.

Syaoran knew if he were caught here so casually, there would be hell to pay. Sitting and having a cigar with an ex-anti-governmental journalist was something his own father would have a stroke over. But when Syaoran looked at Fujitaka, he struggled to see the evil dissident that Base would have him believe he was. Fujitaka seemed gentle, very father like. Unlike Syaoran's own father, who had never offered to sit with him, or speak about anything that wasn't in the name of Utopia.

Fujitaka kept the conversation light, asking about Syaoran's life and showing genuine interest.

"Your father must be proud." He said. They both knew to stay away from anything political.

Syaoran didn't reply. He just nodded with a tight smile. No, his father was never proud of him. Syaoran was only doing what was expected of him. Syaoran often wondered if anything he did would make his father happy. He wondered why he even bothered to push himself for his approval, a word of kindness, anything that showed his father on some level cared about him as a son and not just a soldier.

Syaoran's mother had struggled through two miscarriages, a stillborn and four daughters to finally produce a son.

Syaoran casted his eyes downwards and pinched his cigar.

 _And for what? So, she could produce a disappointment like me…_

Syaoran wondered what it would be like to grow up in the Kinomoto house to a father like Fujitaka. A father who does nothing but worry and dote on his daughter. Syaoran looked back at the house to where Sakura was tidying up.

Sakura, who _did_ grow up in such a seemingly loving home, was plagued by her own demons. Syaoran thought that maybe the grass was just greener on the other side.

"Syaoran," Fujitaka said suddenly.

Syaoran blinked at him using his first name, he knew it was something serious now. Fujitaka was going to abandon light chatter.

Syaoran looked over and saw that his calm face had hardened slightly. He was looking over the garden wall to where the wall between the East and South was visible. His cigar was burning in a hot orange glow. The mood shifted and Syaoran could tell there was something Fujitaka wanted to get off his chest.

Syaoran straightened his spine. He could sense something was coming.

"Yes, sir?" Syaoran answered respectfully.

Fujitaka removed his glasses, cleaned one lens with the fabric of his shirt and placed them back on.

"Sakura, she is all I have left in this world." He began. Syaoran's heart began to pulse slightly harder. He waited for Fujitaka to continue.

"Since her mother and brother passed on, it's just been the two of us. I've tried my very best to keep her from things, to protect her. But as you probably already know, she's pretty determined."

Syaoran nodded and swallowed. "Yes, sir. She is."

"Like a fool, I thought I could protect her from the past. But it seems she is closing in on the truth and when she does, I don't know what she'll do."

Syaoran clenched his jaw, lost for words. "With respect, I don't understand what this had to do with me, sir." He said unconvincingly.

Fujitaka looked him dead in the eye with an expression that said; _Come on, kid. Let's not play around._

"I've done, and will continue to do what I can to protect her. I'd just like to know, that you will do the same." He said.

That's when the last shred of doubt disappeared from Syaoran's mind. Fujitaka knew about Syaoran and his daughter. This wasn't just a friendly smoke together, he was testing Syaoran. Seeing if he was worthy of his daughter.

"I'll protect her with my life, sir." He said with a determination that put some of Fujitaka's worries to rest. "But," He said and looked back at the house. "Sakura…she…she's…"

Fujitaka waited for him to finish.

"I will do my best. But I can't stop her from doing what she knows is right."

Fujitaka took a moment to absorb Syaoran's words. He nodded. Perhaps he wasn't just a love-sick puppy. In the short time he knew her, Syaoran actually understood her. Syaoran could only do so much to protect Sakura. But at the end of the day, Sakura could not be restrained or put in a cage. Syaoran had to respect that.

He couldn't control her, no one can. That's what worried them both the most.

In the kitchen they could hear Sakura shuffling around. They were both silent in their own thoughts about the girl inside who worried them so.

"I'm glad she had…someone." Fujitaka said breaking the silence. "She hasn't been this happy in a while. And when you both find out, I hope you can handle it."

Syaoran furrowed his brows. What did Fujitaka mean by _when you both find out?_ He was about to ask when the phone rang from inside the house.

"Dad, it's for you." Sakura said emerging outside with the phone in her hand.

Fujitaka took the call inside and Sakura wandered over to where Syaoran was still reeling from his conversation with Fujitaka.

"What were you two talking about?" She asked and rubbed her eyes.

Syaoran bit the inside of his cheek.

"Nothing important." He lied and grazed his finger over his knee. "It's been a weird day."

Sakura nodded and lightly touched her finger against his despite the gap between them. "It has. But…It's been nice." She said.

"Sakura, I'm heading out. Meeting some friends. Sorry about the sudden departure Mr. Li." He said and shook Syaoran's hand.

"Be good." Sakura said and hugged him. When Fujitaka met with his friends at this time in the evening it usually meant he'd be out all night on one of his rare nights of drinking.

He kissed the top of her head and held her extra close for a moment longer. Sakura would have thought it odd but he left too swiftly for her to comment.

X x x

"I like pink."

Syaoran propped himself onto an elbow and raised an eyebrow.

"Really?"

She nodded and adjusted the blanket over her naked body. They lay parallel to each other and despite the cold, their naked bodies provided enough heat.

"Yeah. But not just pink. Like…cotton candy in your face pink."

"That's…interesting." He said and laughed.

She slapped his chest. "What? You said to tell you something interesting, that's what I have. I like pink." She said and shuffled closed to him. He wrapped a strong arm around her waist and pulled her closer. "When I see it, I get really giddy inside."

"Giddy?"

"Well…on the inside. I never show it though. But, when I see pink _and_ white together…I get so excited."

"You are a child." He remarked.

"It's better than what you came up with, Syaoran."

"Oh, _Syaoran_ now is it? What happened to _Mr. Li_?" He teased and rolled her onto her back.

She laughed and cringed at the memory of their extremely civil interactions from earlier. He lay on top of her and stroked her hair gently.

" _Mr. Li_ is for special occasions only." She said and reached up to kiss him.

He kissed her back so delicately that Sakura thought it would be impossible for her to be so happy in a moment like this again. He leaned down to kiss her neck, her collarbone, her breast.

Sakura ran her hands across his neck and hair. Her eyes flickered up towards the shelf which concealed Nathala's diary.

"Syaoran," She said softly.

"Mm?" He replied between kisses.

Sakura hesitated, afraid she'd ruin the moment.

"Do you…do you think the walls…will always be there?"

Syaoran lifted his head with a puzzled look on his face. "What do you mean?"

Sakura swallowed and pondered on if she should go on.

"I mean…do you think there will ever be a time when there are no walls? No borders or zones? Just…Tomoeda?"

Syaoran lay beside her and thought about it. He'd never considered it before. His whole life was dedicated to the safety of Tomoeda. He was taught that a vital part of that was to protect the walls. The walls stood for peace and civilization…But the prospect of them ceasing to exist…?

"I don't know." He said honestly. "It…it would be weird."

Sakura nodded. Would it be chaos? Would people feel lost without them?

"Never mind." She said. "If they weren't there, we would never have met."

Syaoran propped himself onto his elbow again and faced her. "Of course we would have." He said with such confidence that it threw Sakura.

"Oh? You think so? And how would that happen if you weren't a soldier and I wasn't a terrible citizen?"

"Well," He began and Sakura grinned waiting for his version of alternate events. "It would probably have been in college. You'd still be a journalist major and I…" He shrugged. "Would be doing some wishy-washy major. Anyway, it'd be late on a weekday, say Thursday. The college bar would be almost empty because finals are done and everyone went home. I'd walk in and order something."

"What would you order?" She asked.

"That's not the vital part to the story,"

"But I want to know. You have to sell this story to me, make it realistic." She teased with a smile.

"Fine then, I order a…rum and orange-"

"Going a bit hard on a Thursday night, aren't we?"

"Yeah, well, I just got dumped, and my car broke down and…"

"Unluckly night for you."

"It is, but" He said holding up a finger to her smiling mouth. "Just as I sip my drink, that's when I notice a girl sitting by herself on the opposite side of the bar. Even though half her face is in a book, I can tell she's beautiful."

"This girl better be me or else this is a terrible story."

"It is." He smirked. "And you are in absolutely no mood to be hit on."

"Because I'm moody?"

"No. Because approaching a girl by herself in a bar is corny, but I'm a guy so I don't know that."

Sakura laughed, engrossed in his story. "And so, what do you do?"

"Well, nothing at first. I'm too intimidated and nervous. But eventually I approach you with some cheesy line."

"Then what do I say?"

"I don't know, what do you say?" He said passing the story onto her.

Sakura twisted her mouth and thought about it. "I find your cheesy line cringe and pretend I didn't hear you, so I just keep reading my book like you're not there."

"Ouch." He replied, pretending to be hurt.

"Well, I missed my bus so I can't go home for the weekend so I'm stuck in this shitty bar being chatted up by this random guy. But- he doesn't give up so easily."

"He's very brave."

"He is." She said leaning in closer. "He asks me my name and I reluctantly answer. When he realizes I'm not interested, he gives up the corny lines and is himself. Although I don't show it, I think he's handsome, and quite interesting when he's just being himself."

"Do I get your number?" Syaoran asked.

"No. But when you see me over the next few days, I will smile very subtly at you, but not speak to you until…." She said raising an eyebrow waiting for him to come back.

"Until…" He continued. "I bump into you at a book store. You work there, and I make a point to visit there and pretend to buy books when I can, just so I can see your face. You don't talk much and your responses are minimal. But with each visit you open up more, and laugh at my dumb rehearsed jokes."

"And every time you come to the store, I blush and get nervous."

"But I can never tell that."

"And then you walk me home after a late shift because it's dark and late." She said softly.

"I'll finally take the plunge and kiss you." He whispered.

"And then…?"

Syaoran paused and looked into her large green eyes. "And then we fall in love."

Sakura took his hand in hers and kissed it. She was so engrossed with his voice, the harsh reality that their lives were far from that made her chest tighten and a lump form in her throat. Because that's all it was, a story, a fantasy.

But that was not their reality.

"You actually think that would have happened?"

Syaoran nodded. "Walls or no walls. I'd find you. Always."

She bit her lip. She didn't want to end such a nice day with tears. He took her into his arms and kissed the top of her head. Syaoran didn't like to think of the should have, could have's. But he knew he was meant to have Sakura in his life.

His aimless, purposeless life. He was meant to meet her, he was meant to keep her located where she was, he was meant to love her.

He thought about his conversation with Fujitaka earlier. If Syaoran truly loved her, he could never control her. Sakura would do what she felt was right. But he could damn well protect her from those who would want to hurt her as a result.

Sakura knew from his breathing that he was asleep. She raised her head and stroked his face softly. Her heart swelled.

She shunned the thoughts that circled her head. The ones who told her that this would only end badly. No matter how Syaoran saw it, they were from different worlds. Not only that, but a storm was brewing within the western walls. It wouldn't be long before it spilled over and effected all sides of the borders.

The question was, what side will Syaoran choose? How far will he go to protect her from it all? From the west? From Toya? From war?

Again, she silenced those unwelcomed thoughts. She'd worry about that tomorrow. For now, she bathed in the sweet memories of today.

"Mah lahn' fey." She whispered and kissed his cheek before succumbing to the call of sleep.

 _'_ _Mah lahn' fey'…_

In English, means _'I love you.'_

X x x

 **I just wanted to write a fluffy fluff chapter because my mind needed a break from writing drama. I'll be coming back to the main story line in the next chapter!**

 **As to address the question about the cultures/heritages of this fanfic, I don't want to give anything away yet but all will be revealed in upcoming chapters. :)**

 _The Next Day_

Yukito was in a great mood.

Everything was going according to schedule.

He had picked up his tux this morning, bought new shoes and was ready to close for the weekend. He ticked off the last of the stock and began counting the money in the cash register. He rarely did this himself but with things going so smashingly, he had let the staff go home early.

He mentally ran through the things he'd have to do before the Palace Peace Ball on Saturday.

 _Comb hair, buy contact lenses, call Mayuki…maybe I should buy her flowers before we leave?_

Yukito nodded. Yes, girls like flowers. He could see Mayuki now, gushing about how kind Yukito was, how much of a gentleman he could be. He knew she'd be impressed with his car. He got a permit to have leather seats, very impressive. Mayuki simply gushed that he was bringing her as his plus one. She squealed when he asked her and has been talking non-stop about it since.

He hoped she'd spruce up well for the palace ball though. Mayuki was a pretty blonde who was the daughter of two accountants, a respectable enough family. She was training to be a veterinarian assistant. She wasn't too bright and her so called _'hilarious'_ stories always rambled on far too long with no real point. She had a pretty face and bright hazel eyes, but Yukito thought she was a bit chubby around the legs and waist. He hoped she'd cover that on the night of the Ball. Yukito had people he needed to impress there, he couldn't be dragged down by her. He warned her already to not speak too much. The ball would be full of intellectuals and while Mayuki looked good on his arm, he didn't need her ramblings to tarnish his image.

No, Yukito would do all the talking.

But regardless, her eagerness to put his cock in her mouth after their first date was enough for him to overlook these flaws.

He considered making her his wife. On paper, they'd look good together. It would depend on how well she behaved at the ball.

The door to the pharmacy opened and the bell distracted Yukito from his thoughts.

"I'm sorry, we're closed." He called over his shoulder.

There was no response so he went back to his clipboard.

"Hi Yukito."

The nib of his pencil snapped when he heard her voice.

He turned around to make sure it was actually her. It was.

"S-Sakura." He said flustered and adjusted his glasses. "It's been a while."

She smiled softly and brushed her fringe back with her finger. "Yeah, it has, hasn't it?" Her voice was soft and sweet, Yukito had never heard it so silky before.

"W-what can I do for you?" He asked and tried to lean against the counter naturally so he could flex his shoulders in attempts to impress her.

"Oh," She said airily. "I was just looking. But, you're closed I see."

"No! No. Whatever you need." He said and straightened his shirt. She looked so good today, he thought. She was wearing a simple knee length blue dress and cardigan. Yukito thought she looked like something out of a catalogue, like a doll. She looked wife material.

"Oh, thanks." She said and pretended to look away coyly.

Sakura knew she wasn't good at this. But she knew Yukito liked this sort of thing. All innocent and what not. Yukito's eyes lusted over her neck to her breasts. He remembered when he once had his hands there, before she so cruelly cut him off. He could smell her, the same scent as the night they were together, Yukito felt his groin stiffen and he leaned against the counter to conceal it.

Sakura Kinomoto never ceased to have this affect on him. But he could have leaped for joy at her sudden kindness towards him.

"You look great." He said and swallowed. "Really, great."

Sakura forced a sweet smile while trying not to glare. She could tell he was mentally undressing her. She hated he had those images of her naked. She felt a rock in the pit of her stomach. The night before she lay in Syaoran's arms, and here she was, pretending to cosy up to another man. She felt sick.

 _No,_ she told herself. _It's not the same. You don't love Yukito. You need to get to the ball though._

"Thank you," She said and looked down in fake nervousness. Yukito clenched his hands. He thought she was so cute …and fuckable.

"So, I heard you're going to the Peace Ball next week, what an honour." She said and tilted her head to the side.

Yukito beamed with pride and cockiness. So, she had heard, and she was impressed. "Yes, I am. It's really an honour. Only the most prestigious get invited. I was shocked that a humble pharmacist like myself was even considered."

"Wow," She gushed. "That's amazing. You're so lucky. I'd do anything to see the palace. It's something an Eastern girl like me can only dream of." She fluttered her hand to her heart.

 _I'm sorry Syaoran, it's just something I have to do…_

Yukito's mouth swung open. He couldn't believe his luck. He never thought she'd go for something like that. He suddenly felt cocky. It worked, by keeping himself away from her, she was drawn to him. She's starting to realize the man he truly was. She was finally caving from her cold-hearted denial that Yukito was a man to be seen with.

"Well, I should go. You've a lot to prepare I imagine." She said and flashed him a smile that melted his heart.

"Wait!" He said and she stopped at the door to look back at him. "Come with me!" He said louder than he wanted to. He cleared his throat and got his composure back. "I mean, if you like, as my plus one."

Sakura's hand fluttered to her heart. "Me? But, I thought you had a plus one?"

 _Shit!_ He thought. He'd momentarily forgot about Mayuki.

 _Fuck her, she'll get over it._ Yukito would not jeopardise a chance with Sakura for someone like Mayuki. He would finally impress Sakura, and she'd be so thankful. He restrained from licking his lips. Yes, she'd be so thankful to him, in more ways than one.

"No, nothing was set in stone. I'd like to bring you, if you like."

Sakura smirked inwardly.

Bingo.

X x x


	20. Fine Dining Part I

**Hello again!**

 **Since my last update the new Cardcaptor Sakura anime series has been released and OMG I am so happy about it! (waiting about 20 years so I feel like a child again watching it, it's great!)**

 **I hope this brings a surge of exciting new fanfics to the Cardcaptor universe!**

 **Anyway, here's the latest update, enjoy!**

"I'm so nervous." She said and shuffled nervously in the seat. "I mean, what if they ask me for my opinion? Am I supposed to answer truthfully? Do I pretend to show gratitude? What if I say too much or too little?"

Behind her, Tomoyo continued brushing Ruby's hair in a daze. Ruby's words were not even registering with her.

"Madison?" She asked when Tomoyo didn't reply.

"Hm?" He said and snapped back to reality.

"The ball? What if I make a fool of myself in front of Eriol? He's having a hard time even going through with this he doesn't need me making an ass out of myself."

Tomoyo combed Ruby's long brown hair in even strokes. "Don't worry. You'll be fine. Stop thinking about it and try to enjoy it." She replied in a monotone voice and a forced smile.

Tomoyo's thoughts were far removed from the ball itself, they were more focused on when the ball ended.

"I'm so glad you're coming with us." Ruby said and sighed with relief and touched Tomoyo's hand.

Tomoyo nodded. Yes, Tomoyo had to go. But not for Ruby's sake, but for her family's.

Tomoyo placed the comb back onto the dressing table and began to twist Ruby's hair into intricate plaits. She used whatever little make-up Ruby had left to spruce her up. Tomoyo did a good job, if she were to say so herself. She had never seen Ruby look so well. She laid out a simple but faded peach dress on the bed for her. It was the nicest outfit Ruby had, which made Tomoyo sad to think about the closets and closets of dresses Tomoyo had to try on weeks before the annual Peace Ball.

Ruby's foot bounced with nerves.

Tomoyo meant what she said, Ruby will be fine, because simply no one at the Peace Ball would acknowledge her presence. Tomoyo recalled the memories of being dragged to the ball every year without fail where she would sit on her throne and tolerate greeting guests, long speeches and constant remarks from her mother to act more lady-like. She despised it every year.

But in all those years, she had never had to mingle with a westerner. They were invited not out of any sort of good gesture or efforts for peace, but to look good and give reporters something to snap. Westerners are often hushed to the back seats where they could be gawked at with intrigue, as Tomoyo used to do in the past.

So, it didn't matter how Ruby looked, she'd be treated the same as the others. Invisible. And Tomoyo hoped she'd be the same.

"Madison, you seem worried." Ruby said and touched her hand lightly.

Again, Tomoyo forced and smile and shook her head. "No, I'm fine. Just catching a cold, I think."

"Well," Ruby gulped. "I am. This…this plan of Toya's, I'm not sure if it's going to work. And Eriol he…he's not objecting to it." Ruby turned in her seat and looked at Tomoyo. "Do you think he seems different to you?"

Tomoyo was careful to keep her face neutral. "I think…I think he's also just nervous. But, as long as you get out of there in time. You'll be fine."

"You mean as long as _we_ get out of there."

Tomoyo nodded slowly. "Yea, of course."

For the past week Tomoyo could think of nothing more than this night. She agonized in her head over and over again about how to foil Toya's plan without getting caught. She looked at it from every possible way but in the end, a solution was not easy to find.

Plan A seemed logical to her at first. She would return home, to the palace. Warn about the impending attack, have Layla arrested and charged for attempted murder. It seemed simple. Not quite.

How could Tomoyo explain her absence from the palace? Or how she came about this plan? She'd have to explain her knowledge of Toya and the village. There were also the repercussions to think about. After witnessing Rei's murder and the rampage of Meiling, she knew that no matter what, the consequences would stretch further than Toya.

Tomoyo looked down at Ruby.

The Military would cease operations on the hospital, the medication for Ruby would stop. A rebellion against the Royal family, there would be serious repercussions. There would be anyway, but Tomoyo would not be the one to rat them out.

Then there was the other factor.

Tomoyo was not ready to leave the West. As selfish as she knew it was, the thoughts of returning to the Palace permanently frightened her. Not now, not when she was finally free and becoming a person that she actually liked. If she were to return, she worried her old traits would grasp her tightly.

No, plan A didn't work.

Plan B was Syaoran. Her oldest friend. If she warned him about Layla, maybe he could stop it. But then again, he was his father's son. Unless Syaoran had dramatically changed since she last saw him, his desperation to make his father proud may overlook Tomoyo's wishes. How would she even get to Syaoran without raising alarm to herself? Would he even be at the peace Ball? He rarely went before. And if he found her, would he really be willing to let her waltz back into the West and pretend he never seen her? She doubted it.

So, after perilously thinking and scheming, she came up with Plan C, which was far more bloodier and risker than Plan A and B. But despite the risks, the benefits were worth it if she succeeded. She patted Ruby's head.

Tomoyo was not ready to leave the West yet. She wasn't ready to leave this life, or Ruby. But most of all, she couldn't stand the thoughts of leaving Eriol.

X x x

Downstairs Tomoyo adjusted her own appearance.

She had to look plain, unnoticeable. She got special permission to accompany Eriol and Ruby under the guise of Ruby's assistant carer. Tomoyo wore a simple brown maids dress with her hair tied back into a small bun.

The swelling of her mouth had finally gone down since Toya thrashed her face. But what was left were ugly blue and purple bruises which ran deep across her lips and chin. Tomoyo winced. It was not a pretty picture.

A noise behind her drew her attention. Eriol came in from outside, fixing the collar on his shirt. Tomoyo gawked only for a second at his dapper appearance. He was a God in comparison to her appearance. He was scowling at whatever thoughts were going through his head.

He grunted with annoyance and Tomoyo went over to fix his stubborn collar for him. It was the closest contact they had in a while. She tried to keep her eyes on the task and ignored his staring at her face, her bruises. He brought his finger to the edge of her lips and she stayed still. The urge to lean into his hand was strong.

"You shouldn't come today." He whispered low so Ruby upstairs wouldn't hear.

Tomoyo shook her head. "It's for Ruby." She lied. "She's nervous."

"Madison-"

"It's already decided." She said sternly and turned away.

He caught her wrist and brought her back gently. She didn't protest. There were too many things circling her mind. He didn't understand what she would have to do. How could he?

He wanted to kiss her forehead and ease her concerns.

"I'm sorry." He mumbled. "I know I've been distant recently. There's just a lot to deal with."

Tomoyo nodded. She was not angry with him. They all had stakes on tonight. But it wasn't just tonight. What will happen if they succeeded in their mission? The aftermath, the backlash that would unload onto the West seemed like more that they could handle.

Eriol leaned forward and tipped his forehead against hers. They stood like that in silence for a few seconds, longing for the rendezvous they had, which seemed like so long ago.

"When it kicks off tonight, get out of there quickly." He said and rubbed her shoulder tenderly.

Tomoyo nodded. "You too." Her hands found themselves on his chest in a slight desperate act. "Don't die."

He nodded with a slight smile which reminded Tomoyo of how strong her feelings actually were. She backed away, it wasn't appropriate to be like this with him.

A moment later Ruby descended down the stairs with anxiety on her face. Eriol and Tomoyo distanced themselves further. Ruby shuffled uncomfortably as Eriol stared at her with bewilderment.

"You look…you look…" He stuttered.

Ruby's anxiety melted from her face and she beamed and blushed. "Well, Madison did most of it."

He hugged her softly and kissed the top of her head. He hadn't seen her look so well since their wedding day.

Tomoyo's smiled to herself. It both comforted and broke her to see them like this. Ruby did look radiant, the small voice of jealously cursed Tomoyo for doing too good of a job.

She shook her head. Now was not the time to fixate on her affair.

There was much more at stake.

Mrs Hiirigazawa burst through the front door.

"They're here to pick you up." She said. Even her voice gave away anxiety.

Eriol nodded and hardened his face. Ruby's hand slipped into his and Tomoyo looked at the mirror one last time.

She slipped on a facemask that covered her bruised lips and nose.

 _Unnoticeable._ She thought.

As they headed out to the van that was sent from the North to pick them up, Mrs Hiirigazawa hugged her son and daughter-in-law tightly, just in case the worst happened. They didn't exchange words, just nods and silent messages.

When they stepped outside Mrs Hiirigazawa began to pat down the back of Tomoyo's dress in a way she thought was quite motherly. She gripped Tomoyo's arms and looked her dead in the eye.

"Don't go running your mouth off there on the other side of the wall. Be good and come back alive."

Tomoyo swallowed, touched that she had come to care so much for her.

The Princess was returning to the Palace, possibly for the last time.

X x x

Syaoran always hated the business around the time of the Palace Peace ball.

Base was no different this year.

Syaoran was not required to go this year, something he didn't argue against. He hated those things. They were dull, long and unnecessary for him. The Palace had their own branch of security, a sub-division of Base that took care of palace affairs.

He looked at his watch. It was only three p.m. and the ball didn't start for another three hours. He decided he'd work late tonight, get updates on the border and anything in relation to Toya, who has seemed to go off the radar recently.

Syaoran walked off Base towards the town where he could grab some food and head back. Outside, he noticed there were more vans than usual. He didn't pay too much attention to it until he caught sight of Chiharu.

"Cadet." He called out and walked over to her.

Chiharu blinked and turned his way. Her posture snapped straight as she saluted him. "Lieutenant Colonel." She said in a loud and formal way.

"Come on Chiharu, you don't have to be so formal." He said lightly but her eyes remained hallow and blank. Her blond hair was cut so severe and short, it zapped her of her innocence and child-like appearance she had once before.

Before she shot Rei Tachibana.

Her face did not crack a smile anymore. Nor did she laugh or display any emotion a sixteen-year-old normally would. Syaoran wanted to sit her down, to at least get her to talk about what happened. Chiharu was completely broken, just as Meiling wanted her.

"Are you off training now?" Syaoran asked.

"No Lieutenant Colonel, sir." She said, keeping her eyes straight, not looking him in the eye. "Cadets presence is required at the Palace Peace Ball, sir."

Syaoran frowned and looked around, noticing that many Cadets were readying themselves and packing boxes into vans.

"Wait, all of you are going?"

"Yes, Lieutenant Colonel, sir. Lieutenant Li Meiling requested our presence, sir."

Syaoran gut instinct knew this wasn't good.

"Requested you to do what?"

Chiharu blinked and hesitated. "I...um…Lieutenant Li Meiling would rather that be kept private, sir."

Syaoran knew something bad was lurking. He took a step forward which visibly frightened Chiharu. He began to question her further but was interrupted.

"Cadet!"

They both turned to see Meiling standing with her hands on her hips, her eyes narrowed.

"Get ready." She ordered Chiharu, who snapped into action immediately.

"You're bringing cadets to the Ball?" He asked.

Meiling smirked. Relations between them were so frosty and strained, it was hard to believe they were once good friends.

"Lieutenant Colonel, don't worry yourself with such things." She purred and turned her heel before he could question her more.

Syaoran heart beat quickened. Something bad could only happen tonight if Meiling were in charge. Syaoran disappeared back into Base. He knew his father would only be annoyed if bothered with such a trivial thing, and Lieutenant General Mizuki would always favour Meiling for some reason. Syaoran pondered if he should follow up on it. He was needed at Base, where the border was. There shouldn't be any need for him to go to the ball, there were enough soldiers going.

He went to administration and grabbed copy of the guestlist, mainly to see if there were soldiers, other than Cadet children who would be at the Ball.

He flicked through the guestlist by zone.

 ** _WEST BORDER SECTION 9: GUESTS (37)_**

 _HIIRIGAZAWA ERIOL, (+2) HIIRIGAZAWA RUBY, TAYLOR MADISON_

Syaoran skimmed by these names and a few other westerners. There seemed to be enough soldiers patrolling the Ball, he thought that maybe he was too paranoid about Meiling. Maybe he wasn't thinking clearly. His suspicion was clouding his judgment.

No, he wouldn't go to the Ball. He needed to relax.

Curiosity led him to flick through the guestbook.

He didn't expect to find what he did.

 ** _EAST, SECTION 15 MAHR BRETHAIN: GUESTS (58)_**

 _KAMAZUNA MIO, (+1) IKEDA RINA_

 _MANAKA HIYASHI_

 _TSUKISHIRO YUKITO (+1) KINOMOTO SAKURA_

The pages rattled as Syaoran's hands shook with sudden rage.

On second thought, Syaoran will go to the Ball…

X x x

It was if Yukito timed it perfectly.

At exactly 4:30pm, Sakura could see the headlights of his car poke over the hill. She cringed as his boxy, but super shiny car rolled to a stop outside her house. She bit her lip as the realization kicked in that she was doing this. A tiny doubt swam in the back of her mind but she ignored it. She couldn't think about Syaoran right now.

Yukito hopped out of the car and fixed his tie. He had his hair slicked back from his face with a sharp parting from the right.

"You look beautiful." He said and produced a bouquet of neon yellow and orange flowers. She clenched her jaw and took with a forced thank you.

He opened the door and she slid in. Her nostrils were immediately assaulted with the smell of leather. When Yukito got in Sakura swallowed and tried to calm her heartbeat. She didn't know why she was nervous. She had that feeling that something would not go right tonight. The same feeling that crept in the day Rei was shot.

She shook her head and told herself to calm down.

 _Stop thinking about Syaoran._ She told the voice in her head. She had not decided whether or not to let him know she was going with Yukito. She knew it wouldn't go down well with him. The thought had crossed her mind to ask Syaoran to bring her. But that would look too suspicious if they arrived together. Syaoran also never mentioned he was going. Also…she thought that he might say no. He would say no just for her safety.

"Are you ok?" Yukito said with too much concern. Sakura almost jumped when he placed his hand over hers. "Don't be nervous." He cooed. "I'll be with you the whole time."

"I'll be fine." She said with a tight smile and slipped her hand from under his to pretend to fix her hair. She imaged Syaoran's face filling with rage if he knew she was with him. Yukito was a topic they didn't go near since their bust up.

In a move that Sakura didn't expect, Yukito reached over her. She leaned back in hesitance.

"Safety first." He said smiling too close to her and grabbed the seatbelt beside her and buckled her in.

She responded with a smile and a forced nervous laugh.

Yukito started the car and subtly glanced over at her, disappointed she didn't react to the low rumble of the engine. Not many men his age could afford a car, or were authorised to have one. It symbolized power, success where there was not much in Eastern Tomoeda. She should have squealed in excitement to be transported in such a lavish way within the East. Mayuki would. But her face was smooth, expressionless. She was in her own thoughts paying no attention to him. His eyes went from her face to her neck to her collarbone. She looked radiant in that deep green dress. His eyes lingered a second on her smooth skin.

Suddenly her hard face looked at him and softened into a small smile. "Thank you again for bringing me." She said in a small, smooth voice.

Yukito felt pride as he drove them off.

Tonight, would be the night. She'd recognise her mistake in refusing to marry him.

It was Yukito's night to shine.

X x x

Tomoyo took an uneasy breath in as the van pulled to a stop.

They had all been silent the whole journey. None of them knew what to say. Eriol had gone deep into his thoughts, as did Tomoyo, leaving Ruby to shuffle nervously.

They walked up the long winding path that lead to the palace entrance. Tomoyo had walked this path so many times. It had seemed like a lifetime ago. In front of Tomoyo, Ruby clung to Eriol's arm. Eriol walked on unintimidated by his grand surroundings. Behind her, Tomoyo saw the other western guests shuffle forward with broken postures, they also did not want to be here. Some of them knew of Toya's plan, some didn't. She just hoped they'd get out on time.

The palace doors were wide open and Tomoyo held her breath as she passed through the entrance of her former home.

They were all greeted by the sound of laughter sounding over a string quartet nearby. As per every year, Tomoyo noted that they were dressed in the grand fabrics and ostentatious hats that boasted wealth. Tomoyo's stomach dropped to think she was a part of all this.

Ruby felt Eriol's muscles tense. She looked up and saw his face had hardened into a stone. She looked around and saw why. The crowds of Northerners were not so subtly looking at the incoming westerners like they were rare animals on display rather than invited guests. Some looked at them curiously, tittering to themselves and whispering into each other's ears. Ruby felt herself curl into a ball, wishing to disappear behind Eriol's strong, unintimidated stature.

"You need to calm down." Tomoyo whispered beside him. "They will be staring all night so you may get used to it now. You look suspicious." Her finger subtly grazed the back of his hand soothingly.

Eriol reluctantly listened to her and eased up a bit. Tomoyo sighed. This would be so much more difficult than she imagined.

They emerged into the Palace front garden which was illuminated with a dazzling array of lights. The Palace Peace Ball always took place outside. The royal family sat at the top, elevated by a stage. The middle of the floor was filled with tables that no doubt would seat Northern and Southern citizens. Easterners were seated at the sides and Westerners were hushed to the back.

"I said form a line!" Barked a soldier nearby at a Western woman who was quick to stop gawking at the Palace in front of her and join the line.

Tomoyo's jaw dropped. It was Tommy. Tommy from the East whom she had seduced long ago. The weak willed freckly boy had moved up in the ranks it seemed. They joined the line ad Tomoyo's heart thumped when she realized why. As custom every year, each guest would greet the royal family with a bow. It was to show respect and to subdue doubts of hostility.

Eriol stopped suddenly.

"No." He said and began to turn away.

Before he could even take a step away, Tomoyo and Ruby had grabbed and arm each.

"You can't not do it, Eriol." Tomoyo whispered desperately to not call the attention of guards.

"She's right." Ruby breathed. "If we don't, the whole plan won't work. You're the Western representative. If you refuse to greet them, you deny the rest entry."

Eriol balled his fists and looked down at the two women stopping him. Reluctantly he turned around.

"No mask!" Tommy barked and Tomoyo's heart began to accelerate. She began to protest. Tommy would probably recognise her. She couldn't risk being caught, not here. "Now!" He hissed and took a step towards her.

Tomoyo obliged and removed it, keeping her eyes downcast.

 _Please don't recognize me._

Tommy's face recoiled for a moment. "On second thought, keep it on." He said referring to the ugly bruises spotted around her mouth.

Tomoyo snapped it back on and moved ahead. That was too close.

As they approached the royal family, Tomoyo became aware of how real this was. She was home again. Her hands started to tremble as her eyes fell on her family for the first time in five months. On her throne, she saw they had placed her crown on a velvet pillow. Even from this far back, she could see the encrusted sapphires winking at her in futile attempt to seduce her back to a life of luxury.

When she saw her mother, her heart broke.

Queen Sonomi, who was known for her beauty, had aged dramatically since Tomoyo saw her last. Her mother always stood to greet her guests. Her nose was always arrogantly high as she nodded to what she considered underlings from the other side of the wall. There was a certain snobby elegance to it. But this time there was none of that. Queen Sonomi was slumped in her oversized throne. Her eyes were staring dully out at the crowd, looking at nothing in particular. Her eyes dragging down with tiredness and her mouth was slurred down exhaustion. They had plastered her face with so much make up it almost looked comical. A layer of blush sat on her cheeks and unflatteringly bright red lipstick caked her lips.

Tomoyo felt a wave of guilt. Had she caused this? Never in a million years would she have guessed that Tomoyo's disappearance would cause her mother so much stress. Beside her, her father sat with a much more composed face that gave away nothing wrong. To Sonomi's left, her little brother Davy shuffled and blew hot air out of his bored little cheeks. The overwhelming urge to hug him and kissed him, to reassure her mother that she was fine and to stop worrying almost got the better of her.

Then, behind her mother, standing so innocently and seemingly loyal was Layla. Tomoyo's longingness melted into rage. No, she had a job to do tonight. She would not let her guard down.

Tomoyo lined up in front of her family. Eyes down, heart pounding, she bowed. Sonomi's eyes flickered over to Tomoyo for the briefest second. Tomoyo held her breath, not sure if she wanted to be recognized or not before Sonomi's eyes passed her without any comment.

"I'm sorry." Tomoyo breathed lightly behind her mask.

She moved on and joined Eriol and Ruby. Just before she could breathe a sigh of relief, she saw a face she never expected to see.

A few feet ahead, Syaoran stood arms crossed and in full uniform. Tomoyo's palms began to sweat. Her family, she could fool. They were oblivious to so much, but Syaoran was as sharp as they came. As they neared him she battled whether to bolt away or chance it.

Lucky for her, his mind was not in the flow of westerners, it was on something else. He had his eyes fixed on something. Whatever it was, Tomoyo saw he was completely absorbed in it. She followed his line of vision towards whatever he was glaring so intensely at.

To Tomoyo's surprise, from the Palace entrance she saw Sakura emerge. She had to do a double take. Sakura, who usually sported dull, subdued colours, was positively radiant in her simple high collar green dress. Her hair was swept back from her face to reveal the unmistakable emerald eyes. She could have fooled Tomoyo for being a Northerner. Despite this transformation, Sakura still held that cold, speculating expression. Some things can't be changed.

Behind her, a tall, slim, pasty man with too much gel in his hair looped his arm around her waist and ushered her towards the line in an act that was almost possessive. Sakura wormed away a bit and put some distance between them.

Tomoyo almost laughed. She never imagined someone like that would be her type.

Tomoyo raised her eyebrow. Why did this anger Syaoran so much? Perhaps, like Toya, he was suspicious of the younger Kinomoto.

Either way, Tomoyo was glad of his distraction as she slipped by him, undetected.

X x x

Sakura suddenly felt small, out of her depth at the sight of the magnificent castle in front of her.

Behind her, she fought off the urge to shudder under Yukito's touch. He was using every excuse to place his hand on her. For now, she would endure it, she would keep him happy until she could ditch him.

She played her part in bowing to the royal family, surprised at their disregard for their guest's presence. The queen's eyes were hollow, staring into nothingness. Beside her, the Princesses seat was empty bar the glittering diamonds and sapphires of her crown.

"The Princess has been sick for weeks now." Yukito whispered into her ear. "Apparently she's so weak she can barely walk."

Sakura nodded and shuffled forward.

"Let me take your coat." Yukito offered and peeled it from her back before she could even answer. He hooked his hand around her waist and urged her towards their table which was occupied by other Easterners, some of who, she recognised as politicians or eastern businessmen.

There were some whispers when Sakura walked by, some people recognised her as the woman who gave them a wonderful insight into the West, some knew her as the daughter of the blacklisted journalist. Oh, how she seemed to be rising through the ranks. It intrigued people. And she was by Yukito's side.

He stood tall beside her, hoping people would recognise him as the man who tamed the girl on the same slippery slope as her father. As the man who moulded her into a good citizen. Oh yes, this would definitely work in Yukito's favour, and looked great on his application of transferral into the North.

"Sit, I'll be back." Yukito said in a tone that was both commanding and possessive at the same time. Sakura clenched her jaw and bit her tongue from firing back at him. For now, she did what she was told to appease him. She'd break free from his watchful eye soon.

As she sat down Yukito beamed, feeling like he just conquered a huge victory.

 _Good, she's respecting my authority._ He thought and went to put their coats away.

Sakura's eyes scanned the crowds, her eyes not settling on any familiar face. Then from the corner of her eyes she made out Eriol and Tomoyo, their heights poking above those around them. And clinging to Eriol's arm was his wife, who looked like she would crumble with anxiety.

Sakura got up to make her way towards them when a figure charging towards her. Her heart jumped to her throat as she knew he would not have kind words for her.

"What the hell are you doing here?" Yue hissed and narrowed his eyes.

Sakura bit the inside of her cheek and crossed her arms. "You haven't returned any of my calls."

"That's not an answer." He grumbled through his teeth.

He was wearing black, as usual. Although in comparison to the other men in suits and ties, Yue's black turtle neck and blazer made him look as if he were attending a mass funeral.

Sakura's eyes flickered from his to past him where Eriol was disappearing from view. She wanted to know what happened since Rei Tachibana's murder. Why was nothing being said about it?

Yue was determined to get an answer from her.

"I was invited." Sakura mumbled and picked at the lace cuff of her dress.

Yue's eyes scanned past her to where Yukito was queueing with their coats. He raised his eyebrow and looked down at her unimpressed.

Sakura rolled her eyes. "OK, fine. I got myself invited."

"You need to leave." He said bluntly and placed his hand on her elbow and began to manoeuvre her towards the exist.

"What are you talking about?" She swiped her arm out of his grasp and planted her feet. "Why is this such a big deal? And why haven't you returned my calls? Do I even have a job anymore?"

"Listen to me." He whispered as to deter the attention they were gathering. He placed his hand on her shoulder and leaned in with a small smile that spiked her anxiety levels. "It's not safe here."

Sakura looked at him and waited for him to elaborate.

"You need to leave." He repeated.

"Why? What's going to happen?"

Yue's didn't look at her. She knew that was a bad sign. But the last thing she would do is leave. No way.

Before she could collect her thoughts, Yue was tugging her elbow again. Yue never thought she'd be here. He even checked the official invite list. How foolish of his not to check plus ones. Toya would murder Yue if anything happened to Sakura. No matter what, he had to get her out of here.

Before Sakura could protest again, she felt her wrist being grabbed and tugged in another direction.

Both Yue and Sakura turned around to see Yukito holding onto Sakura and glaring a murderous look towards Yue.

"Where are you off to?" He asked directing his question to her but his eyes were on Yue.

Caught between the two men, Sakura failed to come up with an answer.

"It's been a while, Yue. Glad to see you're doing well." Yukito said directing his attention away from Sakura. Yukito smiled but the glare remained in his eyes.

Yue did not return a friendly gesture at his cousin. His hand was still firmly on Sakura's elbow. "It has. Still trying to crawl up that social ladder I see." Yue retorted which did not go down with Yukito.

"Yes, well, not all of us ceased the opportunity to abandon our own so young."

Sakura stayed silent, feeling awkward around the tension around them. Some people were beginning to notice the slightly hostile air around them. She didn't need this. She needed to keep low key.

"Come, Sakura. The ball is starting." He said and clamped his hand tightly around hers. She stalled in shock. When she looked back at Yue he was looking at her in an expression she had never seen before. Was that concern? She wondered why Yue would be concerned by someone like her. But for the sake of staying at the ball, she pulled from Yue and followed Yukito.

She broke her hand free from his and kept her hands by her side.

"Don't speak to Yue." Yukito told her in a condescending tone. Yukito was mad at her for getting away, for trying to escape his grasp. "He's unstable. Not the type to be seen with."

Sakura planted her feet and narrowed her eyes up at him. "You don't tell me who to speak to." She said, abandoning her sweet, innocent act. She was here now, she didn't need him.

"Oh?" He said rather confidently and patted her arm in a fake tender way. "If you're not happy with being here with me, then maybe I'm better off without a plus one. Everyone is watching you, you know. Acting out at such a ball like this would not do well for your reputation, or your father's name. Especially if you were escorted away by military."

Sakura's lips parted. Was he threatening her? How pathetic. Yet, how clever.

"I'm sure you want to keep that nice little job of yours too, right." He said and brushed a stray piece of hair from her eyes. "I'm not sure Base would be OK with that if you were escorted off the premises."

"You wouldn't." She said through gritted teeth.

"Tonight is very important to me. I have people to impress. You are not going to ruin it for me."

Sakura bit her lip. As obsessed as he was with her, he was more obsessed with climbing the social ladder over the Eastern wall and into the North.

Now that Yukito had her here, he would make sure she'd behave. When she didn't respond, he smiled victoriously and grabbed her hand again.

Sakura said nothing and balled her fists. She hated that he had an advantage over her.

X x x

 _Why, out of all people, was she with him?_

This thought bubbled Syaoran's mind since the moment he saw them walk in together.

He crossed his arms tighter to keep himself tearing across the floor to pry them apart.

He didn't think after what they've been through that she'd do this to him. He had tried so hard and succeeded in subsiding his irrationalities he had about Yukito and Sakura. She had assured him there was nothing there.

Yet, seeing her being escorted around by that roach, it didn't seem like nothing. All his irrationalities had come back ten-fold and Syaoran felt like he would crack every time Yukito's petite, manicured hands touched her.

He sawed his teeth back and forth. In his mind, he was the only one who could touch her like that. He had been watching her since she came into the castle. She was looking at the palace in awe, oblivious to Yukito's hand was fixated with her waist. She looked breath-takingly beautiful. Syaoran heart leaped and torn at the sight of her. Feeling of pure jealously boiled over inside Syaoran.

Yukito seemed to always be there, lurking in the shadows and waiting for the time to pounce. What was worse, was that Sakura let him. Fobbing him off as a bother rather than a problem. Why him? Why Yukito? With his small beady eyes, grey, wet skin. Petite small frame. Syaoran narrowed his eyes at the way Yukito carried himself so arrogantly.

The tiny voice of reason in Syaoran's mind told him that she was just using Yukito to get to the ball. She was not looking at Yukito or returning any affection. He should be more secure in their relationship…but no. The voice of reason vanished as Syaoran's jealously boiled over.

Was Sakura using Syaoran too? Was everything also a lie? Was he so infatuated with her that he chose not to think about the realistic fact that he was being used too?

Yukito left her to put away their coats and he watched as she searched the grounds. Her eyes seemed to land on a familiar face and she took off in that direction. She didn't make it far before Yue, out of nowhere, blocked her. They exchanged a short conversation that involved her rolling her eyes. When Yue suddenly grabbed Sakura's arm, Syaoran tensed. What was worse was that his stony face softened into a smile. Syaoran's fists balled. An insecure suspicion inside his swelled rather quickly.

 _Is there something between them too?_ He thought angrily. _Is she screwing him too? Is that how she got her job? Is she using him too?_

Suddenly Yukito appeared behind her and grabbed her wrist and she was caught between the two. Syaoran's breathing was sharp and heavy and he barely had enough restraint to stop himself from charging over and snatching them away from her.

 _Stop touching her. She's mine._

The sight of two men with their hands on her was making his hands shake with rage. Too many hands on her when it should only be his.

The tension between the three seemed to have subsided and Sakura slipped away from Yukito. Syaoran, although still angry, restrained himself.

That was until Yukito's hands forced itself into Sakura's.

 _That's it._

He couldn't watch Sakura anymore. Syaoran felt his gun sitting by his side. In there, he felt there was a bullet for Yukito.

X x x


	21. Fine Dining Part II

X x x

There was nothing more he could do.

That damn girl was just as stubborn as her brother.

Yue filtered through the thick crowds with his head low. His nerves had hardened over the years from doing his job, but even something as risky as this was elevating his heartbeat ever so slightly. He disappeared to the control room at the back which was not heavily guarded as much as the front, which was fixated in controlling the flow of guests.

The mumble of the crowds died down behind the thick trees. Yue approached the steel door which was guarded by three soldiers who were rather relaxed considering how formal an event this was. He scanned their faces. Two of them were barely seventeen. He rolled his eyes. They were getting promoted younger and younger.

Yue didn't even need to show his ID badge, most people in the military knew his face.

The steel door closed behind him and his eyes met a bombardment of screens. The images were poor quality and behind them sat a high-ranking soldier whose eyes flickered tediously from one screen to the next. He glanced behind him for a second to acknowledge Yue's face before returning back to the screens.

"Any unusual activity?" Yue asked.

"Not until a second ago." He mumbled and pointed to a screen on his right. "This van just pulled up. Doesn't seem to be on the pre-approved list. A bit suspicious. May need to be checked out."

Yue leaned in and saw the van rocking very slowly up to the west gate of the palace. It was guarded only by two poorly armed security men. No one used this entrance. It was for caterers and the likes.

"You think it should be investigated?"

The soldier nodded. "Or at least re-routed to the east gate."

Yue's eyes scanned the blurry licence plate. He could barely make out the driver, but Yue knew that was what he was waiting for.

"I see." Yue said in a low voice. "And have you informed anyone else about this yet?"

"Not yet. I'll call it in now. Lieutenant Colonel Li is around. I'll pass the message to him."

"I'd rather you didn't." Yue said.

Yue clamped a hand hard down on the soldier's mouth. Before the soldier could even rip his gun from its holster Yue had sliced a knife across his throat. Blood splattered across the screens and keyboards. Yue held on until the soldier's uneven jerks and twitches ceased.

He pushed the now lifeless body to the floor and took his seat. Yue took a second to compose himself. He had killed before, but it was never easy. He didn't have the grit and steel that Toya had.

Looking at the screen again, a figure emerged from the van. Yue wiped the spots of blood off the screen and was both relieved and saddened to see Toya's face. He was really going through with this insane idea.

Toya looked up to the camera and gave a slight nod. Yue nodded to himself and pushed the button that opened the West entrance doors to the palace.

Toya got back into the van, which was loaded with rebels clutching explosives and rifles.

Yue had played his part.

His fingertips touched the screen and his lips parted in anxiety.

"Don't die." He whispered.

X x x

Tomoyo's palms were sweating.

The giant clock above the palace seemed to be ticking slower than ever.

She tried not to shuffle or show her antsy-ness.

Everyone took their seats for the main dinner, which was always an hour affair between long drawn-put speeches and a ridiculous number of courses. It never occurred to Tomoyo the overwhelming wealth of her formal life. Only through suffering through the hardships of Western life did she come to realize how wasteful palace life was.

One night of fine dining at the Palace would be enough to feed Eriol's whole village for days.

She stood behind Eriol and Ruby during dinner. Servants always ate last.

Ruby struggled to take in the sight of the number of cutlery before her. Her hands hovered over which fork was appropriate.

Tomoyo leaned over her and whispered. "Start from the outside and work your way in with each course."

Ruby whispered a thank you, relieved to have her by her side. Tomoyo was annoyed at Eriol, who seemed to have completely gone into his own thoughts and troubles instead of comforting his wife, who was out of her depth.

Tomoyo's eyes found her mother again, who was staring at her food with a vacant expression. Tomoyo took a deep breath in and ran through the plan in her head. She only had one opportunity to get to where she needed to be. She couldn't mess that up.

Queen Sonomi had risen from her seat, and began to walk away. Tomoyo's heart began to quicken. It was uncustomary for anyone to leave during the meal, let alone the queen. To Tomoyo's horror, Layla took Sonomi's hand and began to help her towards the palace.

Not thinking, Tomoyo's feet began to walk away. She had to beat Layla, no matter what.

"Where are you going?" Ruby said and weakly caught her wrist.

Tomoyo's eyes stayed on her mother, who was being stopped by some of the servants.

"I need to use the bathroom. I'll be back."

"You can't leave me." Ruby whispered as a plea. "I don't know what to do."

Tomoyo hesitated and looked to Eriol, who was now not touching his food and engrossed with glaring at Meiling, who was patrolling the cadets.

Tomoyo's eyes flickered from Ruby to her mother, who thankfully seemed to have been convinced to stay at the table. Tomoyo sighed with relief and took her place behind Ruby again.

She breathed steadily to calm her heart.

She ran through her plan in her mind for the hundredth time.

X x x

Sakura sat through dinner service with a tight smile.

The mindless chatter had bounced from boastful stories to occupations to Sakura's journalism.

She groaned inwardly. She didn't want to speak about that. Especially not in front of these people.

"So how did you even get into writing about the west?" Asked a curious woman with a silly pink hat that had a feather poking from the top.

"Oh, Sakura has always had a passion for Utopia affairs. One of the things I love about her." Yukito answered and placed his hand on hers. Sakura's stomach dropped to see the rest of the table look at them with warm faces as if they were a couple. Her hand trembled with rage under his. He was getting too confident around her. She slipped her had away and grabbed a glass of wine. After emptying it she reached for the bottle to refill but Yukito caught her hand in the air and held it tightly on the table.

"That's enough wine for now." He whispered condescendingly into her ear.

She took a deep exhale to calm herself. She felt the urge to bark at him in front of all these people grow. She was embarrassed and humiliated to be controlled by him.

"So where did you two meet?" The woman pestered and leaned in with curiosity, as did the rest of the table. They were intrigued how a girl with her family's reputation had matched with a seemingly perfect Eastern citizen.

"At college." Yukito answered and smiled widely at the admiration he was getting. "She was hard to get but persistence paid off." He said which made them all laugh in an exaggerated way.

Sakura was teeming with anger.

"Well I think that's marvellous." Said a man across the table. "It's good to see a girl like yourself doing well."

Sakura narrowed her eyes at him. "What is that supposed to mean?"

Her dark and harsh tone immediately cut the pleasant atmosphere of the table.

Yukito panicked and laughed. "Aha, what he means is-"

"I'm not asking you." She said not taking her eyes of the man. "I'm asking him."

"Well you know…" He said and shuffled awkwardly under her burning glare. "Considering…you know."

"No, I don't know. You mean considering my father's reputation?" She pried her hands away from Yukito's and everyone looked away uncomfortably.

"Well…it's no secret that your father probably would not have been invited tonight for obvious reasons."

"Well then he's lucky." She remarked. "He doesn't have to suffer through dull conversations of uninteresting people." Even with that comment, Sakura was holding back. This was what the upper end of East Tomoeda looked like. Suck ups to Utopia.

Yukito panicked. This was not good. No, this was very bad. He had to get control of this situation back.

"Excuse me, miss." Said a waiter appearing behind Sakura.

 _Shit._ She thought. _I've blown it._ She knew she'd be escorted out for causing unpleasantness. She didn't know they were listening that intently.

"Yes?" She replied.

"Your presence is required at the high table."

Sakura stared back wide eyes. The high table was where the royal family and other people of the highest status sat.

She rose up with uneasy knees. Yukito also stood up and fixed his tie. Was he being elevated so soon?

"I'm sorry, sir, just the lady." He said and gestured Sakura to follow.

Yukito looked instantly deflated as he returned he his seat.

"Why am I being summoned?" Sakura asked but the waited did not reply.

Behind the long table where the royalty sat, there were a few smaller tables which were occupied by businessmen, celebrities and high-status citizens. Sakura was directed to a table near the back where an old man was looking at her with a kind face.

"Mr Reed is very old and sometimes get confused with what year it is. I'll have to ask you to be patient." The waiter said finally addressing Sakura.

Sakura winced. "You mean, that man is Clow Reed? Of Clow Reed industries?"

The waiter nodded.

Sakura looked puzzled as the waiter suggested she sit at a chair beside him. Clow Reed,of Reed steel industries was a millionaire and a very well-known name. She had no idea what he could possibly want from her. She did what she was told and the waiter left them alone. The man was in his seventies and confined to a wheelchair. Despite his age, his hair was thick and black and hung around his shoulders like a curtain. Sakura did not recognise him.

But his face was so kind with a pair of glasses with circled frames resting on his nose. He suddenly clasped his hands in front on him and smiled a wide smile.

"My girl, I thought you were not going to come." He said and laughed a grandfatherly laugh.

Sakura blinked and wrinkled her forehead. "I'm sorry Mr. Reed, have we met before?"

He laughed again and patted Sakura's knee. "Oh, come now, Nadeshiko. It's just us." He pointed up and leaned in, whispering, "They're not listening to us. Bigger fish to fry."

Sakura's voice caught in her throat. He called her by her mother's name.

"I'm sorry, sir." She began. "But I'm not Nadeshi-"

"Now listen girl," He said cutting her off and glancing around the room. "I've been thinking about what you said and you're right." He grabbed Sakura's shoulders and forced her to lean in. "We need to strike now! Before they put up the bloody walls!"

His words were raspy.

It occurred to Sakura then that he was not only confusing Sakura with her mother, but also confusing time with what was happening over fifteen years ago.

How did this man seem to know her mother on an almost personal level?

Sakura knew better than to let this moment pass her by. "Which attack is this?" She replied, assuming her mother's role.

"The one against the military! We can't let them build those walls." He said with urgency.

Sakura' mouth ran dry. He was talking about pre-takeover. A time Sakura could vaguely recall.

"And how can we stop them?" She whispered, trying to extract more information from him.

"You know how, Nadeshiko. You have to print those articles. Even if they're lies. The people need something to rile them up."

Sakura squinted, his thick accent was hard for her to keep up with. "What articles."

"And listen to me." He continued, seeming to not hear Sakura. "Don't let that husband of yours try to talk you out of it again. Fujitaka is a good man Nadeshiko, but he doesn't have the grit or drive that you do. People like me and you have to do these things for the greater good."

Sakura was overwhelmed by this bombardment of information, she struggled to process it.

"I'll give you all the guns and supplies you need, you now that. They don't suspect and old fart like me. Trust me. I'll keep your secret to death. But you have to do what's right. Think of your children's future."

Sakura swallowed a lump in her throat. She looked around but thankfully no one was paying any attention.

"Mr. Reed." She whispered and touched his soft wrinkled hand. "Why are you asking me to do this? What do I have to do with any of this?"

Clow Reed's soft face turned serious. "Because it's you they recognize. You're the leader of the uprising, Nadeshiko. You and Nathala are what people are looking up to. Don't let them down."

Sakura felt as if her mind had been scrambled. Her mother…a rebel leader. Her mother…and Nathala? But what rebellion? One before she was young? Before she was even born? In Sakura's mind her mother's memory was faint. She was a loving wife and mother who died of illness.

Or so she thought.

"You mean Nathala B. Omerson?"

"Fujitaka is a good man," He continued without answering her. "but his morals will only slow you down. Stop letting him plant doubt in your mind!"

He seemed to not hear her, his mind planted in a time fifteen years ago. Was Sakura so similar looking to her mother that is transported him so vividly back to that controversial time?

"Mr. Reed." Sakura said clutching his hand. "You have to tell me more-"

"I'm sorry, miss." The waiter interrupted. "The dance will begin soon so you will need to return to your seat."

"Just another minute-"

"I'm sorry, it's the rules. All guests must return to their seats."

Sakura gritted her teeth and rose from her chair.

"Thank you, Mr. Reed." She said and turned from him.

He caught her hand and leaned in to whisper. "Print _Spinnel 7._ "

Before she could even ask what that was, she was escorted away.

 _Print Spinnel 7…_

X x x

Sakura walked back to her table in a trance.

Clow Reed's words still rang in her ears.

 _Print Spinnel 7._

What was Spinnel 7? Sakura struggled to think that her mother was far more complicated than her memories and father had led her to believe.

Before she got to her table, Yukito was by her side and leading her to the dancefloor where others were also moving to.

"What are you-"

"It's the first dance."

Sakura put her foot down. "No." She attempted to walk away but he kept a tight grip on her wrists. Yukito's face struggled to stay smiling. She was not in the mood for this after what she had just heard from Clow Reed.

"It's just one dance. Don't embarrass me now in front of everyone."

Before Sakura could escape the music started and Yukito's hands were on her waist and hand and began an awkward shuffle that was supposed to be a sway. His hand was warm and sweaty which made her squirm.

"Who were you talking to back there?" He asked. "Did you mention me? Do they know you came with me?"

Sakura didn't answer, her mind was spinning from her conversation with Clow Reed. She gulped. There was no more hovering around the issue, she had to have a serious talk with her father about the past, and about her mother. This time, she would not let him avoid her, or lie to her.

"Are you listening to me?" Yukito rasped into her ear.

The floor filled up with dancing pairs and Sakura felt silly even being a part of this. She needed to go somewhere to think. "I have to go." She said and attempted to break away from him but he was quick to catch up to her.

"At least wait until the song is over." He grumbled.

She was about dismiss him and leave anyway. Ball or no ball, she was done with this night. She needed to get home and confront her father, who had kept her in the dark for far too long.

As she began to protest her eyes flickered across Yukito's shoulder and landed on something that froze her feet solid in their place.

Yukito stumbled at her sudden stop.

"What's wrong?" He asked in annoyance.

Sakura's face was frozen in shock. Her heart plummeted into her stomach and her mouth became instantly dry. She blinked twice to make sure she was not hallucinating. She wasn't.

Across the dancefloor, standing in the corner with a face as hard as steel, Syaoran was watching her.

Her hands instantly began to shake. How long has he been there watching her? Watching her with Yukito? By the incredulous expression on his face, she knew he'd seen enough.

 _No, no, no._ She thought. _Why is he here?_

He had said he wouldn't be there. It was the only thing that made her secure in coming here with Yukito. The secrecy itself had made her stomach twist, but now he was here, seeing her with Yukito. Although he was far away, she could tell her had a murderous expression on his face.

 _No, no, no Syaoran it's not what is looks like._

Sakura tried to gulp but her mouth was too dry.

Her sudden change in manner even alarmed Yukito.

"What's wrong with you? Get it together." He hissed and looked around to make sure no one else had noticed.

"I…I…" She didn't even know how to do damage control here. Should she go over to Syaoran and explain? Would it be too suspicious if she left Yukito and went over to him?

She was suddenly extra aware of how close Yukito was to her. How his hands were on her, now and all night. She felt sick. As if suddenly shaking herself out of denial, she realized how wrong this was. She wanted nothing more than to run to Syaoran and beg for forgiveness and shower him with love to prove that he was the only one, that this meant nothing.

But the fear and shame of being with Yukito at that moment paralysed her to her place. Yukito had to roughly shove her from side to side to get her legs working again.

"The song is almost over." He said angrily but with a smile.

The rest of the song seemed to drag on forever, all the while she suffered under Syaoran cold glare. Her heartbeat raced and she prayed it would just be over already.

When it ended, Yukito finally took his hands from her to clap for the band with the others. Sakura had managed to move her feet again and charged past Yukito without even thinking. When she looked up, Syaoran had already stared to walk away from her. Her weak knees tried hard to push forward to reach him, as if she knew what she'd even say to him. She pushed through other couples to reach the edge of the dancefloor.

X x x

Eriol kissed Ruby's head.

The time had come. The first dance was over, which signalled that the chaos would start soon. She held onto him for an extra moment and held in her tears. She refused to consider he wouldn't make it out alive.

Eriol glanced over at Tomoyo, who was fixated on the clock above the castle. She seemed calmer than Ruby, almost as if preparing for something else.

"You know when to run?" He asked her again and she nodded.

"Why can't you come too?" She whispered.

"Don't worry about me." Eriol said and his eyes glanced up to where Meiling was. "I won't be long behind you."

"You too, Madison." He said addressing her.

She looked up and came out of her thoughts to nod. Although she had no intention of leaving the palace until she did what she came to do. Tomoyo looked up at her mother who was clapping mechanically, disinterested in the whole thing. Tomoyo's gaze was distracted by Sakura, who was walking with urgency across the dance floor. Tomoyo raised an eyebrow and pointed to her.

Ruby and Eriol looked at her direction and Eriol felt slight panic at seeing her here.

"Hey," He said and held an arm out to stop her. "What the hell are you doing here?"

She halted suddenly and looked at him with panicked eyes. "I…can we talk later?" She said in a shaky voice and tried to manoeuvre by him.

"Sakura." Eriol said with forced and grabbed her by the shoulders.

Sakura pried her eyes from Syaoran, who was getting father away. Her heartbeat was racing, she had to get to him and explain herself.

"You can't be here." Eriol whispered. "It's not safe, you need to leave?"

"Why is everyone telling me that?" She said in a frustrated voice. She was frustrated by that and the fact Syaoran was disappearing from her vision.

"You're not safe here." He repeated. Eriol didn't know Sakura would be here. Surly she should have known better than to come here. "Didn't Toya tell you?"

The mention of Toya's name broke Sakura from her trance. "Toya? What?"

Eriol knew from the surprise in her voice, she didn't know. "You have to go right now before-"

"Is Toya here? In the palace?" She said raising her voice. "Why? What is he gets caught?" Sakura's eyes scanned over Ruby and Tomoyo's faces, which were laced with concern and almost pity for Sakura.

Then something clicked it her mind.

"Is there going to be an attack?" She whispered.

"Yes." Eriol answered reluctantly. "And if you don't leave now, you're going to be in the middle of it."

"But what about you guys? Won't you also be-"

"We have our own way out. It's you who needs to go, now."

Eriol didn't finish what he was saying before Sakura bolted past him and towards the trees where Syaoran's figure was disappearing.

Her mind was not on her safety, but Syaoran's. Too many things were fighting for priority in her mind. Either way, she had to reach Syaoran.

X x x

"Too easy."

Toya nodded. It was too easy. Yue did an excellent job.

Around him, hidden behind the discretion of the trees, Toya's men changed into soldier's uniforms. They had taken out some on-duty soldiers and had infiltrated the palace. It was working out too perfectly. Some of the soldiers were barely eighteen. Not that Toya felt a shred of guilt for ending their lives quickly.

This was all for a good cause.

"Lieutenant Meiling Li is here, sir." Kazahara said. "Also…Lieutenant General Mizuki."

Toya felt his spine tingle at Mizuki's name. He was lucky to have Meiling at the ball, revenge would be sweet. But for Mizuki to be here too…? It was as if tonight was simply meant to be. Toya placed a firm hand on his gun. He and Mizuki would settle their score tonight.

Toya knew his mother would be proud of him.

"Explosives are ready, Toya." Kazahara said eagerly.

Toya looked at the men and women who were willing to die tonight for him and the cause.

No turning back now.

X x x

"Syaoran." Sakura called.

She was catching up to him but he showed no signs of slowing down. That image of her and Yukito dancing together, it turned his stomach and sent a sharp pain through his heart.

"Syaoran!" She called louder, thankful they were in the shelter of the trees. "Please." She said with her voice breaking.

She caught him by the cuff of his uniform. He finally stopped charging forward and halted. He wouldn't look at her. He couldn't.

Sakura could see that he was physically trembling with anger. She had never felt him so enraged.

"Syaoran," She begged. "Please look at me."

She thought he wouldn't. With great strength, he turned to face her. The rage in his eyes turned her blood cold.

He said nothing and Sakura was suddenly lost for words. What the hell could she possibly say? Suddenly the threat of an attack had faded as a priority. She had to calm him down, to reassure him.

"It's not what it looks like." She said meekly, disappointed that that's all she could come up with.

He clenched his fists and she thought he'd take a swing at her. She would have rather he did. His silent rage was terrifying her.

"It never is with you." He said bitterly and pulled his cuff from her grasp.

She ran in front of him and placed her hands on his chest to stop him walking away. He glared down at her. He was so angry, yet in his mind he was hoping she'd say something that would comfort him, prove that what they had was not a lie.

"Syaoran, it's nothing. Ok?" She said in a hushed, quivering voice. "Yukito…he-he's nothing. It was just an invite. It doesn't mean anything." She said desperate for him to soften his face and relax.

He balled his fists at his side and made no moves to touch her or showed he understood, because he didn't understand. His eyes ran over her smooth, beautiful face that had smiled so innocently, over her lips that had him convinced that he was the only one, that she cared for him. In his heart he wanted to forgive her already without her even explaining because he knew that he was that weak for her. And then the image of her hand in hand with Yukito came back with a punch to the heart.

"Please believe me." He said with her voice breaking.

Her cracked voice did not sway him. He couldn't tell what was genuine with her anymore.

"I don't believe you. I don't believe anything that comes out of your mouth." His voice was so dark and low that it sent chills down her spine. "Maybe it is nothing with you two, and maybe you are just using him, you're good at that." He pushed her to the side.

He didn't want to do that, but he had to put some distance between them before he either exploded with jealousy and envy or succumbed to weakness.

She grabbed his jacket again, refusing to let him go. "What does that mean?" Her finger shook as she tried to hold tight to the thick fabric of his jacket.

"You had me fooled." He said raising his voice. Finally, he was giving into his anger. It felt goof to raise his voice to her. He knew he had been to placid, too understanding towards her and respecting her freedom of choice. But she had to see what she was doing to her. He had restrained himself enough.

"You actually had me believe that you cared about me, that you loved me. But you're just using me like you are Yukito!"

"That's not true." She shouted with a tear breaking free from her eye. "You think I don't care about you? About us?"

"You obviously don't if you came here with HIM! Out of all people, Sakura, why him? If you wanted to come here so badly why didn't you just ask me? I would have brought you-"

"Oh yeah?" She said and backed away with her hands in the air. "because that wouldn't be suspicious, would it? Us two strolling in together?" She said defensibly. "You know we can't do that?"

"Then why didn't you tell me you would be here with him tonight?"

"Would you have actually been OK with that? If I told you I was coming here with him tonight?"

"No!" He fumed and took her possessively by the shoulders. "I'm not OK with you being here with any man." He raged honestly.

His hands tightened around her shoulders with an emotion that he couldn't distinguish as rage or passion.

He didn't know whether to shake her with rage or smother her angrily in an embrace.

The rage and possessiveness in his voice startled her. She realized to the extent she was hurting him. She felt so ashamed at herself

"So, what was I supposed to do? I found a way to come here. Just because I came with Yukito doesn't mean there is anything between us. Don't you trust me?" She said softer, hoping it would calm him down.

"After tonight, no." He said and put a cold arm's length distance between them. Despite the pain and hurt she was causing him, when he looked at her, the endless amount of love he had for her told him to look past what she did, what she was doing to him. It was driving him crazy.

"Syaoran." She said weakly. "Please, Syaoran...It's just a ball-"

"It's not _just_ a ball." He fumed. "It's everything. Your secrets and your lies and your- your manipulation."

"When did I manipulate you?"

"When you made me believe you loved me!" He raged and stabbed a finger accusingly at her.

Sakura recoiled as if shot. "That's not a lie. I've ever lied about that…how I feel about you." Her own heart broke to think he didn't know how much she really felt about him. Was she that cold in the past? How could he think she toyed with him like that so cruelly? She could never do that to him, he was the only man she had ever loved…

"Syaoran," Her lip quivered when he didn't reply to her words.

"I don't want to hear it." He said sternly.

"Syaoran," She breathed and attempted to close the gap between them. He put his hand out to keep her away. She stopped in her tracks and felt her chest ache at the rejection. "I'm sorry. I'm- I...you have to believe me when I say-"

"No." He said firmly which silenced her. "You'll just do this to me again and again. I'm done with this, and I'm done with you."

Sakura's stomach dropped. She began to shake her head slowly from side by side as if to reject what he had just said.

"You…what?" She asked, praying she heard him wrong.

Syaoran clenched his jaw and repeated through his teeth. "You heard me. We're done. I'm not doing this anymore."

Syaoran turned and began to walk away before he crumbled and took it all back. Though his words were so strong and definite, he knew if he stayed a second longer he'd apologize for those words he didn't really mean.

He himself didn't know why he said that. It didn't mean to come out. Caught in the moment he just wanted to hurt her, he was desperate to see a reaction. Would she actually fight for them?

He walked away quickly. A part of him just knew that with his threat, she would resort to her true cold self. He imagined she'd cross her arms and give him her cold, green glare and say something like, _"Am I suppose to beg? Do you think that's a threat? Do you think I care?"_

It killed him to know that Syaoran was always the weaker one in their relationship, the one who'd fight harder, love more and excuse all.

Sakura was unable to move. He had finished with her. She had finally pushed him over the edge. Nothing she said changed his mind or restored his fate in her. She heard a ringing of disbelief in her mind.

They were over. He didn't love her anymore.

That thought alone, was more painful than any bullet wound.

He suddenly felt a tug at his jacket cuff again. When he turned around she was standing there, not with a look of smugness or defiance, but with mouth open and tears brimming in her eyes. She was shaking all over and her face had become bleached white.

He had never seen her so shaken.

She began to shake her head. "No. Please." She whispered in such desperation. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry just please don't- please don't…" She couldn't produce anything clearly and Syaoran stiffened, almost frightened to see her crumble so extremely in front of her.

Her hands moved from his cuff to his chest and clutched the fabric there in desperation.

"Syaoran, please. I'm sorry. Don't do this. I-I fucked up. I promise I won't see him again, ever." She whimpered not even ashamed to let herself be so weak. "Whatever you want. Just don't…don't…"

The panic at the thought that he didn't love her anymore had cancelled out her pride and even the warning of the attack.

Syaoran anger had zapped away in that moment but what he was left with was uncertainty. He had never seen her so vulnerable to him.

"Sakura…" He said in a tone that did not give away forgives or anger. Was this genuine? Or maybe just her last resort option.

She looked up at him with wide anxious eyes, terrified of his reply. And as she held her breath and waited, somewhere on the other side of the palace hidden in the shadows, Toya also held his breath and took in the moment of sweet tranquillity…

… before the destruction.

X x x

"Syaoran?" She asked when he said nothing.

His face was expressionless apart from the slight narrow in his eyes. She clutched him desperately trying to convince him not to leave her.

Finally, he opened his mouth to speak, unsure himself of how to reply.

His mind, which was frozen with indecision, was interrupted by a horrifically deafening explosion nearby followed by a shower of gunshots.

The first of many to come.

X x x

 **Thanks for reading!**

 **:)**

 **X x x**

Tomoyo bolted at the first bomb.

The westerners took it as their cue to run.

Ruby screamed and ducked into the fleeting crowd. When she turned to look back, Tomoyo was gone.

Tomoyo's legs shook as she pounded the ground and into the cover of the trees towards where she needed to be. Her heart raced as she ducked and jumped over branches. She didn't have time to stall or re-think her plan. He mind was so focused on where she needed to be, she didn't even noticed Sakura and Syaoran ducking for cover on the ground as she ran past them.

At the first explosion, the royal family was swept into cover and currently making their way to the palace.

Tomoyo had to beat Layla before she could strike.

The screams and gun fire became muffled behind the tree tops but her heartbeat thudded loudly in her head. She emerged into the small damp clearing and threw herself onto a pile of weeds and vines. This was the spot.

Though she hadn't used it in many years, she remembered exactly where it was.

Her trembling hands clawed them away until she had finally reached the steel, rusted handle of the small door. With great strength she lifted it upwards. It let out a roaring screech and it revealed a square hole leading downwards into a black abyss. It had been so long since she used it, she had forgotten the terrifying coldness inside it.

Without another second to hesitate, Tomoyo threw her legs and body into the hole. The door slammed behind her with an awful hair-raising clang.

Tomoyo stayed crouched low in the blackness for just a moment as her heart thumped loudly. The screams and gunfire from outside were cut off and she could only hear her own jerky breathing. She waited in the silence until she willed her legs to move again.

She took a deep breath.

The easy part was done.

The real challenge was yet to come.

X x x


	22. Fine Dining Part III

**Hey guys!**

 **I was going to wait and upload two chapters but then I finished this and decided, why not just now? (hehe)**

 **I'm also so thankful for all your reviews! Your reviews give me motivation to keep writing.**

 **Anyway, here's another chapter,**

 **Enjoy!**

X x x

A few seconds after the bomb, Sakura felt Syaoran's weight push her onto the ground for cover.

He shielded her from the falling debris that fell from the sky. They registered the shock in each other's face and before either of them could speak they were silenced by the muffled but frightening sounds of bullets nearby. Syaoran squinted through the trees to make out bodies rushing forward and back across the palace grounds.

He didn't know what the instigator was, but he knew where the retaliation would come from, and Meiling wouldn't hesitate to use them.

"Sakura," He said taking her petrified face into his hands. "Stay here." He said firmly.

He didn't even get onto his feet before she had dragged him back down by the cuff of his sleeve. "You're going out there?" She said with wide, frightened eyes.

"I have to." He replied. His whole life was to train for scenario's like this. Syaoran had to move fast to secure damage control.

Sakura's grip tightened. "Syaoran don't you hear that?" She said referring the cluster of screams. "You'll get killed."

"I'll be fine. Please Sakura, stay here. I'm begging you." He said knowing that she'd be tempted to defy him.

Their previous argument was put on hold for that moment and in the madness of gunfire his number on concern was to keep her as far from it as possible. There was no time, every second was crucial.

"Wait, what about…" She drifted off. Her mind was scrambled and unable to remain focused on one thing. Their argument, him going out there…her brain couldn't settle on one thing.

He saw the distress in her eyes and took her hand. "We don't have time." He said softly. "Let's talk about this late, ok?" He had an underlining tone of urgency in his voice. Of course, he didn't mean what he said back then, the scenario had drastically changed in the past few moments but now, every second counted.

She held onto him for another second. So many things she wanted to say.

Sakura just nodded, her breathing jagged.

Syaoran lingered for a second longer, unable to muster the strength to leave her. He needed to tell her that he was just being stupid, an idiot like he always was. But as the screams from faraway grew heavier, he had to unwillingly prioritize that.

Sakura remained kneeling and watched as he ran towards the chaos. Sakura felt the strange sensation that paralysed her to that spot. She closed her eyes and shook her sharply as if to re-awaken her.

What was that? She thought to herself. What was that moment of desperation she felt back there? How could she let herself became so weak in the moment? Why was she so weak and unable to move now? Her heart was beating rapidly, her brain was delirious with indecision.

Another bomb sounded off far away.

Then a thought sprang into her mind that sent a chill up her spine.

 _Toya._

Sakura felt a jolt.

 _Wake up!_ Barked the voice of reason in her head. _Move!_

Toya's here. In the palace, something bad is definitely going to happen. Toya was out for blood. Sakura didn't know if she was more afraid of him getting hurt, or who he'd target.

Either way, she had to move.

She felt herself come back. The feeling in the tips of her fingers returned and she narrowed her eyes at newfound strength. She looked at the direction Syaoran took off in.

 _5…4…3...2…_

Before she even counted to one, she was on her feet and sprinting towards the palace grounds.

X x x

Tomoyo shuddered at the icy coldness of the tunnel.

It had been so many years since she ventured through it, she had forgotten how eerily dark and claustrophobic it could be.

The sounds of gunshots from the outside were completely muffled and all she could hear was her own heart thumping in her chest.

She placed a hand out to the cold, rusted concrete wall and followed the path. In her younger days as a rebel princess, she often had ventured through the underground tunnels to escape into the palace gardens. Being locked up in the castle for years had led her to explore and accidently come across the tunnels, whose use for she never knew. When she grew up, the thrill of sneaking out had lost its appeal.

The wall dipped sharply to the left and she felt the ground slant upwards slightly. Though it had been many years, she felt that she knew this place inside out still.

She reached out into the darkness and felt the palm of her hand make contact with the wooden door. She paused and held her breath for a second, making sure there were no noises of voices coming from the other side.

Nothing.

Her fingers traced down to where the latch was. It cried as she twisted it and when she heard the snap of it unlocking, she hesitated.

 _Stop hesitating._ She scowled at herself. _This needs to be quick._

Thankfully, the room was empty.

Finding her courage again, she pushed the door open. She peered into what use to be the servant's kitchen before renovations had relocated to the other side of the castle. With shaky hands she opened the drawer and rooted around until her hand found what she needed. She gulped and brought the long, thin knife before her.

 _Be quick, Tomoyo._ She told herself and wrapped the knife under her apron.

X x x

Sakura had lost sight of Syaoran.

The main gunfire seemed to have moved further away from the palace and towards the gardens. Sakura ducked behind a tree and peered beyond the bark towards where the fighting was happening.

There were bodies sprinting back and forth but what Sakura was most confused about was that they were all wearing soldiers uniform, making it impossible to differentiate friend from foe. She squinted and made out a uniform that was too tattered to be military.

 _This must be Toya's doing._ She thought and gulped to think her brother could have anything to do with this. She tried desperately to keep her eyes away from the limping bodies and pools of blood forming around the tables. Her stomach dropped as she fought with indecision to fear or worry about Toya.

As if on cue, she saw a tall figure emerge from behind a parked van. Toya showed no signs of fear as he strode through the centre of the dancefloor completely unfazed by the bullets whizzing around him.

"Toya," She whispered in panic as she made out the insane murderous look in his eye.

He was going to do something bad, or die trying. Sakura didn't know which she was more afraid of. Her legs pushed forward towards the dancefloor with no idea of what they were doing. She just wanted Toya out of there before he got shot. She didn't want to think of how much of this he was possibly behind this destruction. Was he really capable of such violence? In the name of what?

Sakura's mind stalled for just a second so she could hear someone in the distance shout _'grenade!'_ followed seconds later by a small blast nearby. Sakura dropped to her knees and shuffled under the white cloth of a nearby table. She ducked her head under her hands as if that would deflect bullets.

Sakura felt she was not alone under the table. She lifted her head and saw a small girl rocking back and forth with her blonde head buried between her knees. A rifle sat beside her.

"C-Chiharu?"

The girls head bobbed up with bloodshot eyes. Chiharu's breathing was shallow and quick, she was having a panic attack.

"S-S-Sakura?" She stuttered and began to rock quickly back and forth.

"Chiharu get down!" Sakura shouted and pulled her to the ground as the roar of another bomb died out somewhere.

Chiharu looked up with quivering lips and a frazzled expression.

"I can't…" She cried as her voice broke. "I-I can't do it again. Don't make me." She screeched and clutched Sakura's dress. "Not after I killed that girl. I can't go out there." She spluttered with trembling hands.

"Chi." Sakura said in a smooth but hasty voice as to not alarm the girl. "It's OK, it's Ok. You don't have to do anything, just get yourself away from here." Sakura said and attempted to unhook her hands from her dress but Chiharu hung on and buried her head into Sakura's chest.

"I killed already. I can't do it again." She mumbled.

Sakura found herself embracing the child and soothing her amidst the chaos going on outside.

Sakura risked a peek through the gap on the table sheet and what she saw made her blood turn cold.

"Syaoran," She breathed.

Chiharu looked up and followed Sakura's gaze.

Syaoran was heaving an injured soldier away from the line of fire, barely protected by a plastic shield. But that's not what made Sakura's stomach dropped. She was not the only one who had spotted the general's son.

Thirty feet across the dancefloor, walking with a sickening smirk towards the unsuspecting Syaoran, Toya showed no signs of slowing down. As if this night couldn't get any better for him, Toya would have the privilege of being the last person Syaoran would see.

 _Oh God, no._ Sakura thought, unable to even produce words. _He's going to kill him._

"No," She whispered and tried to bring her weak body to its feet. "No, Toya, don't."

Chiharu's own mind was caught between its paralysing fear of dying, and the shame of not trying to protect Syaoran, the only person in this world who showed kindness towards her. Finding newfound courage, Chiharu raced past Sakura and towards Syaoran.

"Chiharu, wait!" She shouted but her voice was drowned out by a new onslaught on bullets coming from the East.

Syaoran gave the tiniest sighs of relief. Reinforcements had finally come. In his arms, a comrade groaned from a leg wound. If Syaoran could get back behind the line of defence, he'd be safe for now.

"Syaoran!" He heard a small voice call out from behind him.

Toya marched forward, he was so close now. He could kill Syaoran from where he was, but he wanted to make sure his bullet went through his head perfectly. He was bloodthirsty for it.

The shower of bullets pushed Sakura deeper behind the table when she really wanted to just run towards Toya and wrestle the gun from his hand. Her heart thumped as she barely made out Chiharu running towards Syaoran with the rifle too big in her hands.

Syaoran's face dropped in shock when he saw Chiharu coming his way. Her shaky fingers fumbled with the rifle, wasting precious seconds to load the damn thing. She was running with purpose and only when she was in front of him, still trying to load the rifle with clumsy fingers, Syaoran noticed who she was protecting him from.

Toya didn't forget her face. The one that killed Rei Tachibana, the one who instigated this rebellion. He should really thank the kid, he would. He'd make her death quick.

It was all happening too fast. Toya gaining on them, Chiharu's act of bravery. Syaoran suddenly realized what she was trying to do. Chiharu's hand, which had simulated loading a gun over and over again was clumsily getting in each other's way, sending Syaoran's nerves into overdrive.

 _No! Stupid kid!_

"Chiharu, no! Get down." Syaoran bolted to his feet and reached a hand out to push her down.

Too late.

 _Bang._

Syaoran recoiled as he felt warm specs of blood splatted across his face. For a moment, everything was silent except for his heartbeat, which seemed to have fallen to the pit of his stomach and into somewhere far away. The hand that was meant to save her, now turned to catch Chiharu's body before it slumped onto the blood-stained dance floor.

A few feet away, Sakura's breath caught and she thought she'd chock in shock. She blinked, then blinked again, but the scene didn't change.

Toya stood there with a passive look and smoking gun. His face did not even flinch from the time he lifted his gun to the time he fired a bullet through Chiharu's neck. Sakura keeled over and felt her stomach lurch.

In his hands, Chiharu's body convulsed and gurgled as blood began to splutter out of Chiharu's small neck. Syaoran stared down at her, mouth agape in horror as the kid he had looked out for over the past four years was rapidly leaving this world.

Her mouth opened and closed, trying to swallow air to no avail.

"Chi…" Syaoran said and pushed bloodied strands of blond hair from her face.

Sakura's face drained of colour and she shuddered in utter helplessness. She hadn't done enough to try to stop this. She suddenly felt out of her depth, like this was too much for her to control. A small movement from the corner of her eye jolted her body to move again.

Toya, bored of watching the scene unfold, reloaded his gun. He looked around him, this was taking too much time. He's have to retreat soon. The main battle was taking place away from the palace to lure the majority of soldiers away from palace grounds. Hopefully, the distraction worked enough to buy Layla time to do her work. Toya narrowed his eyes and brought his gun to face Syaoran.

This action spurred Sakura to bolt forward, ignoring the stray bullets firing around her.

Syaoran was oblivious to the impending danger, using his hand to plug the blood from her throat and fighting desperately to coax Chiharu back to life.

Toya thought he'd be more satisfied with killing the general's son. But he was conscious of the time slipping by. There was still Meiling to deal with. And of course, Mizuki.

Before Toya's finger could hook around the trigger, Sakura's hand came from nowhere to clamp down on the nose of the gun and divert it far away from Syaoran. Toya recoiled in shock. Before he regained his footing Sakura's palm pushed his chest backwards in a desperate attempt to separate her brother from Syaoran.

"Toya, please stop." She whispered in a low, petrified voice. She knew he would be incredulous with her interference and her knees shook as her hand kept his gun pointed downwards. Toya looked down at her face with shock, expecting her to be the last person here of all places, and the last person to get in his way.

Toya dug his heels into the ground and in one swift harsh motion, he pushed her roughly away from his with his arm.

"Don't interfere!" He growled down at her, his eyes raging.

"Toya, this has gone far enough! You killed a kid!" She shouted back in a shaky voice, afraid to stand up against him. "Is this what you wanted?"

Toya took two huge strides towards her which terrified her. Her grabbed her upper arm tightly and shook her while screaming. "I told you to not interfere! now get the hell out of here!"

"Wait, Toya!" Sakura felt her nerve try to escape her but she simply couldn't leave knowing that Syaoran was his next target. Toya tried to turn away from her but her hands grabbed his jacket and began to drag his back but it was futile and Toya was not putting up with it. "You won, OK? Look around you, they're dead! If you stay they're going to kill you too!"

"You think this is winning?" He hissed at her. "We haven't even scratched the surface. Don't you dare pity them, Sakura. That _kid_ killed Rei. It's just revenge. And if you dare try to stop me again," His grip tightened again, making her wince, "Don't be surprised by what I do next."

He released her and turned back to his mission.

Sakura's heart pulsated. She felt sick but, in that moment, she acted anyway.

Running in front of Toya again, she pushed her arms out to block his from Syaoran, as if her small frame could act as a wall between these two men who wanted each other's blood on their hands. Toya was done with this. He had warned her. His patience with his little sister was up, he had no time for this.

"I told you to get out of my way!" He barked and brought his fist up threateningly high. Sakura held her breath and squeezed her eyes shut, waiting for his fist to strike her.

But it never came.

Faster than lightening, Syaoran body collided with Toya's and knocked him backwards. Syaoran's fist came down like a tonne of bricks on Toya's face. Sakura screamed as Syaoran, in epic rage, struck Toya over and over again.

"Syaoran!" She shouted and grabbed his fist mid-strike, almost getting hit herself in the process. "Stop, please. He's out." Syaoran's face did not look at her, it was fixated in cold rage at Toya. Finally, he had the bastard.

Amazingly, Syaoran listened and backed away from Toya. Sakura looked down at Toya's beaten face. He was knocked out cold for the moment, and Sakura was thankful.

"Syaoran, we need to-"

Sakura's voice broke off. When she looked back up at him, he had retrieved Toya's gun and had it aimed at Toya's unconscious body. He hadn't calmed down. Not at all.

Sakura's lips parted and her breath stalled as the switch in her mind flipped from protecting Syaoran, to Toya.

Syaoran's eyes were different from what she had seen before. In his full uniform, with that gun in his hand and that cold, unforgiving look in his eyes, he was a soldier now. A soldier swimming in rage. Behind him, Chiharu's body was still, easily mistaken for sleeping had it not been for the blood darkening and hardening around her face and neck.

Sakura was kneeling between Syaoran's gun and Toya's body, eyes trying not to tear up from both fright and disorientation. She couldn't find words to reason with him. Instead, she reached a trembling hand up and if that would prevent the bullet. Despite the battle still raging on somewhere away from them, Sakura felt as if it were only them.

"Step away, Sakura." Syaoran said in a distant and detached voice.

She tried to swallow the ache in her chest as she shook her head. Despite the danger, she would not move.

Syaoran tried to not succumb to the begging in her eyes. All around him, his comrades had died or were dying because of this prick.

"Syaoran-"

"Sakura." He said more forcefully. He wasn't allowing himself to hear her reasoning. No, he was a soldier and this was his duty. Toya, no matter what relation he was to her, had to be taken out. For his comrades, for Chiharu, and even for Sakura's own good, he had to do this.

He _wanted_ to do this.

Syaoran's hand was steady, but inside her was trembling with rage.

"Syaoran…" She begged. But her words were lost to his rage, and deaf to the barrel of his gun.

X x x

Tomoyo was surprised by how empty the palace was.

The stairwells were vacant which allowed her to move around freely undetected. Her palms became sweaty with nerves as she approached the main hallway on the second floor. Somewhere in the distance she could hear guards talking to each other, expressing fear and worry. This was the first time they had encountered such a rebellion. For years the palace security had breezed by in such an easy job with little threats. Now, face with danger, some had abandoned their post.

The hallway was dimly lit and Tomoyo crept along the cold walls until she reached the edge. She peered around the corner and listened out for movement.

Clear.

It was going a little too well for her.

She steadied her nerves and nodded to herself when she located her mother's quarters. Perhaps that's where she should look first. She prayed she was not too late, that Layla had not completed what she set out to do.

 _Just run,_ she told herself. _While it's clear._

She steadied herself to make a break for it across the length of the hallway. A small echo from the opposite end halted her two steps in and she scurried back behind the corner. Her heart punched her chest and she clamped a hand over her mouth to control her wild, frantic breathing.

Footsteps came closer and Tomoyo pressed herself as tight as she could against the wall. The footsteps were coming closer, there was no time to retreat back behind the secret door.

"I don't understand!" She heard a voice boom. "Have you told the General yet? Doesn't he know we're under attack!?"

Tomoyo's other hand fluttered to her chest to hear her father's voice after so long.

The footsteps came to an abrupt halt. "Yes, Your Majesty, Base are informed and they are sending reinforcements as quick as possible-"

"Then where are they?" The King fired back. "And why the hell are they winning out there? Why haven't you taken them out yet! They'll breach the Palace at any moment!"

"Your Majesty." The guard responded in a meek voice. "Rest assured the battle is moving further away from the palace, there is certainly no threat to you or your family."

"Then kill the bloody savages!"

The guard hesitated. "We're trying to, but..."

"But what!?"

"But they seem to have adopted soldier's uniforms. It's extremely difficult to differentiate them from our side."

"Well them kill all of them to make sure!" He barked.

The guard did not respond to the King's disregard for the human lives that were dying to protect him. This was not something that Princess Tomoyo would have even blinked at, but Tomoyo of the West felt a fire in her chest about her father's selfish need to protect himself only.

"Where is my wife and son?" The King asked.

"The Queen and Prince are safe; Layla and two guards have taken them to the West quarters until everything is calm again."

Tomoyo's ears twitched. Layla was already with them, had she already done what she set out to do?

"OK." The King said. "I want to speak to the General on the phone." He charged ahead quickly past where Tomoyo was concealing herself. She could smell his scent as he walked by. She clutched the knife tucked under her apron and battled the urge to reach out to him.

He had not even removed his crown.

 _No time. I have to find Layla._

X x x

"I don't understand." She said in high pitched voice that only startled Davy more. "Why are we moving? Where is the King? Is he coming too?"

Layla walked in front of them holding a torch with a neutral face. "King's orders, your Majesty. He feels more comfortable if yourself and the Prince took shelter elsewhere. The rebels seemed to be gaining the upper hand."

Queen Sonomi muffled a scream behind her palm and squeezed Davy's shoulder. The young boy's face was white with terror as his small body was pushed forward.

Layla bit her lip and exercised patience and control at the Queens persistent whining. Layla had been patient for so many years, she'd only have to endure this for a little while longer.

Layla tried not to squeal at the thoughts of killing her and that pathetic son of hers.

Her only regret was that she would not be able to finish the Princess off too.

Wherever she was.

X x x

Every second that went by pushed Tomoyo's heart rate faster.

Time was so important now.

Ahead of her she saw tall shadows stretching towards her direction. Ducking behind a curtain Tomoyo peaked a blue eye out as the shadows approached.

"This part is very isolated, Layla. Are you sure this is where my husband told you to bring us?"

Tomoyo almost collapsed in relief to hear her mother's voice. When they appeared around the corner Tomoyo breathed a sigh of relief to see her and Davy unharmed yet.

"Yes, your majesty. Please wait here." Layla said in a calm, neutral voice.

Tomoyo grinded her teeth when she laid eyes on Layla, who in her simple maid uniform, pulled back matronly hair and soft aged face could be misinterpreted as a kind and loyal servant.

She certainly had them fooled.

Layla ushered them into the room and promised them she would return after informing the nearest guard of their whereabouts.

Of course, Layla had no such intentions. Her hands were practically shaking with anticipation. She disappeared into the next room which was the Princesses room. Layla had to think through every part of this plan. The first part was to isolate the Queen and the Prince from the guards. Being such a loyal and trusted maid through the years worked in her benefit. It was a shame that the King was too absorbed in what was going on outside to comfort his wife and son. No matter. As soon as she took care of the Queen and Davy, she'd lure the King away, pretending the Queen requested him. Then she'd take care of him.

But Layla needed to take care of herself, too.

She would leave this awful palace and return to the West tonight as a hero. But she needed to buy time for her escape. She had stashed extra blankets in the Princesses room where she'd wrap their bodies and tuck them under the beds. It would take the guards long enough to find them and by that time, Layla would be long gone.

Brutal, she thought. But necessary.

In the Princesses room, Layla tore through the wardrobe and pulled out the blankets eagerly. She wasn't nervous about murdering them, but more about getting herself out of there. Her attention then turned to the princess's jewellery stand. She grinned. Might as well pawn some of the princess's diamonds to get by.

Behind her, Layla did not hear the door close.

Layla fattened her pockets with emeralds and rubies from Tomoyo's drawer, the clanging of metal and diamonds almost drowning out the light footsteps behind her.

Layla's ear twitched. She froze, feeling a presence behind her. Very slowly, she twisted her neck and almost screeched at the tall shadowed figure standing in the middle of the room. Layla jolted back, knocking over the jewels.

The figure took a step forwards and Layla squinted to try recognize the face behind the mask. Her eyes fell onto her clothes which she thought were familiar. Layla breathed a sigh of relief.

"You're from the West." She said and relaxed her shoulders. "We're on the same side. When I finished what I have to do here, let's leave together."

The person did not respond but brought a slender hand up to remove the mask from her face. At first, Layla found no familiarity within the short black hair or the tanned face of the woman. But when she saw the cold, icy blueness of her eyes glare at her in a way that only one person could, Layla gasped to herself.

"You seem stunned." Tomoyo said and Layla's mouth fell open at the familiar wickedness in her voice.

Layla's shock pleased Tomoyo.

"You…" Layla began. "I thought you were dead."

Tomoyo smirked. "I'm sure you wish that were true."

Layla clenched her jaw. Maybe it was her lucky day. She would get to kill them all off.

"Princess. Your mother has been so worried! Come. Her and your brother are in the next room. They will be pleased to be reunited with you." Layla walked towards her but stopped sharply when Tomoyo produced and large knife from her apron.

"I'm sure they would be. But I'm not here for them. I'm here for you."

Layla recoiled, puzzled. "I don't understand."

"I know everything." Tomoyo admitted and played with the knife, running her finger along the silky steeliness. "I have to admit, you certainly had me fooled. All those years of picking my dresses, waiting on my every command, brushing my hair…it must have sickened you."

Layla's face dropped from its gentle composure and scrunched up. "I should have slit your throat when I had the chance."

"You should have." Tomoyo smiled. "But it's too late now."

"Why are you…those clothes?"

"Oh, these old things? Not particularly my style but I try to blend in as best as I can."

Layla furrowed her brows before she came to realize what Tomoyo was saying. She began to laugh a disjointed, cackled laugh. "You've joined the West?" She said between laughs. "You? Well that is a surprise."

Tomoyo shrugged. "People surprise you."

"If that's true, then you know why I have to do this. Your parents, they've ignored the suffering of the West for decades. The monarch has to fall." Layla said, nearing Tomoyo and eyeing up the knife in her hands. "If you're truly one of us, you'll help me."

Tomoyo brushed a piece of hair from her eyes. "You're right about my parents. They are selfish, oblivious and act in their own interests. They won't change, they never will." She said. "But so am I."

Layla took a chance and lunged at Tomoyo. Tomoyo was taken off guard and thrown backwards. The knife escaped her grasp and bounced a few feet away from her. Layla's hands tightened around Tomoyo's neck and she pressed her thumbs into her throat. Tomoyo's hands clawed at her face until she released her.

The glint of the moonlight off the knife drew Layla's attention and in a split second she crawled towards it. Tomoyo gulped for air and bolted upright. She grabbed Layla's ankle and reeled her backwards before she could reach the handle of the knife. Tomoyo's left hand pinned Layla to the ground while the other grabbed the knife. She raised it high into the air. There was a moment of hesitation as Layla locked eyes with her.

Tomoyo's hand quivered. The knife suddenly felt heavy.

"You can't do it." Layla rasped. "It's not in you. You're just a pawn. A bystander to Base. You're not a killer, not a doer, just a spoilt, rotten cunt-"

Layla's wheezing was cut off as Tomoyo plunged the knife deep into Layla's chest once, then again, then again. Each stab was met by a disturbing puncturing sound Tomoyo was sure she'd never forget.

Tomoyo was unsure of how many times she stabbed her. She just kept going until there was no resistance from her.

Tomoyo sat up and lolled her head back. She stared at the pure white ceiling and gulped before forcing her eyes to confirm what she had done.

Layla's body did not move, her eyes were becoming hollow and vacant. After a second Tomoyo felt the warm sticky blood on her face, neck and arms, she was stained red herself. She felt bile rise within her throat and gagged.

 _Don't throw up. Just move. Time to go._ She told herself.

She dropped the knife by her side and embraced herself for a few seconds.

"They're safe." She whispered to herself. "They're safe. They're safe."

She breathed through her mouth and stood up.

She wiped down her apron and stepped over Layla's body. She strapped her mask to her face again to conceal her identity. It was only when she turned towards the door when she saw to her utmost horror, she was caught.

There, in the doorway, Davy stared in at her and Layla's now bloodied corpse with wide, petrified eyes.

Tomoyo's stomach dropped. How long had he been there? Had he seen her? Tomoyo stretched her hand out in a motion that was supposed to calm him. But her blood-soaked hand had only made him physically tremble. He opened his mouth, trying to scream but no sound came out.

Tomoyo pounced over to him and slapped a bloody palm over his mouth pinning him against the wall.

"Don't scream!" She whispered. "Don't scream, Davy. It's me. It's me." She chanted and removed her mask so he could see her face. "It's me, Tomoyo." She felt his frenzied breathing under her hand and his eyes gave a sign he recognized her. "Listen, Davy, I can't stay. I have to go. But you need to be good OK? You can't say anything. Don't scream, OK?" She soothed and patted her brothers face gently, unintentionally staining his pale face with Layla's blood. "I'm so sorry you had to see that Davy. I'm so sorry. But it was for you, and mom and I-.." Tomoyo was lost for words and she could tell he was too terrified to absorb her words.

Tomoyo's heart broke as she knew now she'd have to leave him.

She wanted to embrace him, kiss his head and tell him to stop worrying. But there was no time for that.

"Davy, tell me you understand. Please."

Instead of responding, his eyes rolled back and closed. He fainted.

Tomoyo picked him up and kissed his head. She lay him on her bed and stroked his head. Her heart sank.

"I'm sorry Davy, I'm sorry."

With the last of her strength, she grabbed Layla by the ankles and dragged her into the en suite. Dumping her into the bath and tossing a towel over her, Tomoyo glared down at Layla as a reminder to herself what she would do for her family.

Tomoyo fled the room and scurried back into the secret tunnel.

After what she did…she knew she'd never be the same again.

X x x

"Sakura, get out of the way." Syaoran warned again.

"Please, Syaoran. Don't." She said again.

Behind her, Toya groaned as he came back into consciousness. Syaoran clenched his jaw, worried that Toya would slip by his grasp. For months Syaoran has been searching for Toya. Had he only found him sooner, perhaps there would have been no casualties at the palace tonight.

"He's done this Sakura. All of this is because of him. You can't defend him."

"I can't let you kill him, either." She said desperately.

Syaoran's hand trembled. He felt sick having her at the end of his gun. It was his worst nightmare realized.

"Sakura…please. Get out of the way." He said.

"You know I won't."

They were at a stalemate.

The tenseness was broken by a missile shooting overhead accompanied by a fresh showed of bullets. Syaoran ducked and turned around to see tanks emerge on almost all sides. Southern reinforcements had finally arrived.

The low rumble of tanks had brought Toya back to consciousness, he sat up and rubbed his blurry head and he feverishly tried to remember what happened.

"Toya-" Sakura began but pushed him back to the ground as another missile fired dangerously close to them. Groggy but quick thinkingc, Toya grabbed Sakura's wrist and reeled her under his arm. The ground shook beneath Syaoran as he pulled himself upwards. A high pithed ringing in his ear delayed his reactions. He picked up the gun again and pulled it on Toya, who was making his escape with Sakura being dragged close behind him. Aiming his gun, Syaoran could not get a clear shot of him without the threat of hitting Sakura too. They vanished over a hill towards where the rebels were retreating.

"Damn it!" He cursed.

The tanks rolled in closer to him and from them, soldiers poured out. Their boots hit the ground and began setting up defences and tending to casualties.

Syaoran himself retreated. He glanced over at the hill to where Sakura and Toya disappeared to. Toya was unstable. God knows where he was dragging Sakura to. He had to get her back from that madman.

Syaoran took a step forward towards their direction.

"Colonel Lieutenant!" He heard. "Reinforcements have arrived awaiting your orders, sir. What are your commands."

Syaoran's mind was racing. "Round up all rebels." He said. "But _don't_ shoot if unarmed." He said, conscious that Sakura might be among them. He can't risk that, no way.

The soldiers sprang into action and Syaoran took a moment to recover. He placed a hand on his rib, he was injured, a sharp pain pressed against him when he breathed.

 _Breath through it._ He told himself. _It's not over yet._

"Where is Meiling?" He barked.

X x x

"Toya where are we going?" She said staggering behind him.

He didn't reply. His footing was staggered and slowing down. Sakura knew he had a concussion. They emerged from the trees and were met by two other rebels. They came to Toya's aid immediately. As they washed Toya's face Sakura's mind and heart raced. She wondered if Toya remembered her interfering. Did he notice anything suspicious about her and Syaoran?

 _Syaoran._ She through and her spine snapped straight.

She glanced behind at the tall trees and agonized if he were OK. Those were military tanks that come in. He'd be OK, wouldn't he?

Then there was Toya, who without Syaoran's help, whether he was aware of it or not, protected her from Toya hitting her. She gulped and looked at her brother, who beaten face was struggling to process the now. Would he have really hurt her? Did he want to hurt her?

Sakura felt her world shift. She was seeing Toya in a whole new light. A darker, more sinister light.

"Toya," One of them whispered. "We have to leave. The military from Base are here, we've no chance against them."

Toya shook his head and stumbled to his feet.

"Toya," He said again with more urgency. "Layla will have done what she needed to do by now. We have to get out of here, now."

Toya rubbed his temples. Meanwhile Sakura stayed silent, afraid to re-fire his anger.

Toya's eyes landed on her. His foggy mind had momentarily forgot his anger towards her. "Kazahara," he said to one of them. "Take her and get out." He said and roughly shoved Sakura into one of them.

"Aren't you coming?" Sakura said.

Toya shook his head. "Where is my gun?" He growled, seeming to have forgotten Syaoran had taken it after he was knocked out. Sakura said nothing.

Toya looked around with rage until his eyes settled on something that stilled him. Down by the base of the hill, he saw her.

"Kazahara," He said without looking at him. "Give me your gun."

Kazahara did not hesitate to hand it over. Toya strapped it into his belt and smirked in a way that made Sakura nervous. She followed his gaze and parted her lips.

Why was he focused on _her?_

"Toya, let's go." She begged and reached out to him.

"Get her out of here." He growled at them again. "After this," He said finally focusing his attention to her. His eyes blackened as he towered over her. He leaned in uncomfortably close, their noses almost tipping each other. "You and I will have a long chat." He threatened and lingered his cold, threatening glare at her for an uncomfortably long time.

She didn't dare speak back to him. His chilling glare made her bones shudder.

He released her from his glare and took off down the hill.

Sakura's eyes lingered in Toya's direction long after Kazahara dragged her away.

X x x

Meiling sighed and looked around her disgusted.

"All that effort," She said aloud to herself. "Wasted."

She lightly kicked the body of a nearby cadet on the off chance they were still alive.

No response. No response from the group of dead cadets who, by the looks of things, were all ambushed at the same time.

She showed no remorse and crossed her arms almost annoyed at them for getting murdered.

She pursed her lips and sighed again. The gunshots were finally dying down since Base arrived. Kaho wouldn't be happy. Of course, she never was. That bitch was always walking around with a permanent scowl.

 _Damn it!_ Meiling cursed as she thought about how long it was going to take to assemble a brand-new cadet force.

She heard a rustle behind her.

Thank God, she thought. Maybe at least one of them was smart enough to survive.

From the bushes behind her, it was not a cadet that emerged. And when she saw him, she raised her eyebrow in shock.

"Well, well." She smirked. "You and I seem to keep bumping into each other."

Eriol was not impressed. Meiling didn't react to the cold look of thunder on his face and his tightly clenched fists.

"Meiling." He said in a low, controlled voice.

Meiling placed her hands on her hips and raised her eyebrow. "You seem annoyed. What is it? Frustrated that you lost? If it makes you feel better," She said casting an eye down at the cadets who were littered with bullet holes. "It could have turned out better for me."

Eriol was reminded of that day when Meiling came to the West and instilled terror into his people's eyes, to when she murdered Rei, and all the other atrocities she probably worked on. The side of reason that kept Eriol sane most of the time had subdued. He wanted blood. It was about time. He didn't like that it aligned with Toya's goals, but he didn't care. Blood for blood.

"This happened because of you." He said raising his voice.

Meiling delighted in his anger. The usually passive, well behaved Eriol was letting go. It actually excited her. She couldn't deny to herself that she was even attracted to it. Shame he was just a savage though.

"Now, now Eriol, don't pass the blame over. There are two sides to all of this." She said sweetly before narrowing her eyes and grinning. "But we both know which side will face the consequences. Make no mistake about it."

"Perhaps," He responded. "But I think both sides could do without you."

"Oh? Are you here to kill me Eriol? How interesting." She said and pulled her gun from her belt.

Eriol stiffened.

"Yeah, forgot about this, didn't you?" She said and cocked her head to the side. The gun winked at him in the moonlight and she stroked her thumb over the metal. "Shame to kill you though. I thought your wife would be the first to go. Poor woman, can't catch a break, can she?" Meiling snickered.

"You think I am afraid of you? There are plenty of people who want you dead, Meiling. Trust me. If I don't kill you, someone else will."

"Hmpf, we'll see about that." She said and cocked her gun. "Not to sound cliché, but any last words? Anything you want me to pass onto your wife?"

Eriol's eyes flickered from Meiling to the figure that was approaching her silently from behind. He was not subtle enough. Meiling sensed something off. Before she could look behind her, she was met with the crushing blow of a blunt object.

X x x

Sakura struggled to keep up.

The gunshots and noise had decreased to stray bullets and random commands.

The dense forest around the castle was difficult to navigate around. Sakura looked behind her, unsure of what direction even led back to the castle, to Syaoran.

"I don't know," One of the men said to the other anxiously clutching his comically huge rifle. "I just think Toya's gone on some sort of a rampage. It was never meant to go on this long."

The other nodded and huffed. "Best to keep those opinions to yourself. You know how crazy he went at that other guy for calling Toya out."

"Fuck this. Let's just head back. I'm not willing to die just cause that lunatic-" He cut himself off and they both turned awkwardly at Sakura, who was narrowing her eyes at them. She said nothing and walked on.

Were they right though? Everything that was happening tonight was insane. And it was all Toya's doing.

Her thoughts were disrupted by gunshots up ahead. Before Sakura could located where they were coming from, the two men bolted to the left. Confused and disorientated Sakura's feet turned clumsily and got caught in a latent branch.

She called out in in pain as she felt something definitely sprain. The two men looked back at her hesitantly before deciding to bolt on her.

Alone and afraid, Sakura hobbled to her feet and winced at the pain. She buried her face into her hands and let out a scream. Her mind was torn to a thousand places. Was Syaoran safe? Where did Toya go? Which side in all of this was worse? Was she even going to get out of here alive?

The sound of some bullets and commands ahead of her made her shake. She staggered ahead with thoughts of at least clearing the forest, then she'd figure out her next move. It went eerily quiet for a moment then voices ahead got her attention.

She tried to keep silent as she neared the clearing. She kept her body low and listened out.

"Yeah, forgot about this, didn't you?"

Kneeling against a log, Sakura squinted and made out two figures.

"You think I am afraid of you? There are plenty of people who want you dead, Meiling. Trust me. If I don't kill you, someone else will."

Sakura recognized the low gruffness of Eriol's voice immediately. She silenced her heavy breathing a crawled forward.

She froze when she saw Meiling, gun in hand directed at Eriol.

 _Shit._ She thought. They were alone too. Sakura recalled Meiling's fear of Sakura the last time, but here, there were no witnesses. Meiling could take them both out and get away with it. Sakura could practically hear Syaoran and her father's voice in her head telling her to get the hell out of there.

She couldn't do nothing.

As if by divine intervention, Sakura's hand brushed up against a stray, loose branch. Its end was dry and hardened. She gulped and shook her head at the thought forming in her mind. Yet, as she looked up at the back of Meiling, she could tell Meiling wouldn't stall time killing Eriol.

Sakura's small hands grasped the branch.

"Hmpf, we'll see about that." Meiling said mockingly and cocked her gun. "Not to sound cliché, but any last words? Anything you want me to pass onto your wife?"

Sakura bit her lip as she rose to her knee, ignoring the painful sensation rippling through her ankle. Hobbling into the clearing she brought the branch behind her and raised it high.

Eriol's eyes flickered to her and before Meiling could register her, Sakura brought the branch down hard on Meiling's skull.

X x x

Tomoyo emerged from the darkness.

She threw her body onto the weeds and coughed violently as the dust and dirt cleared from her lungs. Bringing herself to her knees she wiped the tears with the back of her hands and pressed her face against her blood-soaked hands.

She muffled her sobs and tried hard to push the violent images of Layla's last moments from her mind.

Her hands intertwined into the weeds and she squeezed them to bring herself back to the now.

Looking down at her palms, the silvery moonlight made the dried blood look black and sinister.

Her breathing was heavy and she felt a sharp pain in her lungs when she thought of Davy lying passed out on her bed while in the bathroom, Layla's body was getting cold.

But she did it. She saved her family.

 _Get up._ She told herself.

 _Get out of here._

Bringing herself to her uneasy feet, she staggered into a run, her mind only on making it out of here, and finding Eriol.

X x x

"Pull back the cadets!" Syaoran barked at the nearest soldier behind the defence line.

"Lieutenant Colonel are you OK? You're bleeding-"

"I said pull back the cadets!" He repeated with more urgency as he poorly wrapped a bandage around his arm to temporarily aid the small bullet wound.

"I'm sorry Lieutenant Colonel, but the cadets are under Lieutenant Meiling Li's derestriction. A-and I don't know where they are."

Syaoran stalked away in search of Meiling. Base soldiers had come full force and the rebels were retreating back to the West. Syaoran was not going to allow any more children to die at the hands of Meiling's little test.

Then there was Sakura, who he prayed was safe under Toya. But God knows. When the palace was secure, he'd find her if it was the last thing he'd do.

He walked towards the side of the palace to where Meiling was probably grouping the cadets.

But what he found was far more unnerving than he expected.

X x x

"Oh shit." Sakura panicked and clawed her hand through her hair. She dropped the branch to her side. "Shit, shit, shit."

Sakura dropped her knees and crawled over to Meiling's body; a gaudy and unsightly gash to the side of her head made Sakura's stomach turn.

Eriol put his hand to his chest and felt his thumping heart. He actually thought he was a goner. How stupid he was; rushing head first against Meiling with nothing but a pocket knife and rage. If Sakura hadn't shown up…he would…and Ruby would be…and…Madison…

He rubbed his face and thanked divine intervention for giving him a second chance.

"Eriol!" Sakura shouted to call him back to the present.

Eriol walked over to them and removed Meiling's gun from her hand. He checked it, two bullets. Yeah, he would have definitely been done for, twice.

"Eriol, are you listening?" Sakura said. "D-did I kill her?" She asked and leaned over Meiling's face to check for breathing. She was.

"I hope so." Eriol responded. "If not, I'll do it." He said and cocked the gun.

Sakura's eyes widened in panic. "Are you serious? Eriol, enough people have died tonight. Listen!" She said and gestured towards the palace. "Base are here and if they find you here, with Meiling's gun, who do you think is going to suffer really? Let's just get out of here, OK?"

" _This_." He responded in a low but annoyed voice. "This is all _your_ brother's doing. And all these mindless deaths are because of _his_ following. So maybe it's not me you should be talking to."

Sakura stayed silent and looked from him to Meiling. Of course, he wanted revenge. For Rei, for everyone, but is killing really the only way to balance this out? Sakura wanted Meiling to see justice too, but not this way.

"Eriol if you get caught-"

"Stop trying to protect me Sakura, I'm already dead. After tonight, they're going to come for me anyway. Might as well take this bitch with me."

She saw his determination, she knew she could not sway him.

"Then don't do it in front of me." She said and tried to stand up. "Ah!" She cried with the pain in her ankle.

Eriol sighed and reached a hand out to help her. She took it and he steadied her to her feet. She misjudged the uneven ground beneath her and stumbled backwards, Eriol caught her by her wrist; at the worst possible time.

He was about to ask her if she was OK when the sharp sound of a _click_ behind them caught their attention.

They both turned their heads at the same time and were met by a gun held by a fuming Syaoran.

X x x

Sakura's lips parted to say his name but stopped.

She was conscious of Eriol's presence and couldn't give away the nature of her and Syaoran's relationship.

Syaoran had not seen the events the played out before but the scene before him told a very obvious- but misinformed story.

The dead cadets littered around them, an unconscious, possible dead Meiling, a gun in Eriol's hand and the other, holding Sakura's wrist up in a seemingly violent way, and the painful expression on Sakura's face... It all pointed to a very simple conclusion in Syaoran's mind.

None of them said anything. Eriol's kept very still, his hand still holding up Sakura's wrist.

"Let her go." Syaoran said slowly and angrily.

Eriol remained still. "It's not what it looks like." He said matching Syaoran's tone; unintimidated by him or his gun.

"I said, let her go." He repeated.

Eriol released Sakura's wrist and she fell to the ground, outstretching her hands to protect her face. Eriol gripped the gun, not willing to let that go.

"It wasn't him," Sakura said coming to Eriol's defence. "Meiling had her gun on him-"

"That's enough, Sakura." He said interrupting her and unashamed to use her first name in front of Eriol.

Though Syaoran was overwhelmingly relieved she was safe, he couldn't imagine but to think what Eriol would have done to her is he'd been a second too late. Maybe her body would be next to the cadets.

And maybe it was the loss of blood, or his head wound, Chiharu's death or pure exhaustion, but Syaoran was not willing to let Eriol away with this.

Eriol, who probably orchestrated this whole massacre alongside Toya. Eriol, who was allowed to roam free under Syaoran's nose planning massacres like these.

Syaoran's vision was blurring, Eriol's glare became hazy and the nose of his gun swayed a little to the left.

"Syaoran…" Sakura whispered noticing a deep red stain on his arm.

Her chest tightened and had she not been crippled by her ankle she'd had ran to him.

Eriol, sensing something was not quite right with Syaoran, turned confidently towards him with Meiling's gun.

"No, don't!" Sakura shouted and threw her arms out to drag on Eriol's arm. He shook her off and she fell backwards, fuelling Syaoran's anger and sharpening his mind for long enough to get a good aim on Eriol's forehead.

 _Do it,_ Syaoran's mind urged before he lost consciousness. His finger hooked around the trigger, just pull.

Everything went in slow motion for Sakura as her head swivelled from Syaoran to Eriol unsure of who would kill who first. She was frozen in the moment and held her breath waiting for the bang of a bullet that she knew no words would stop.

A slight rustle from Eriol's left distracted Syaoran and before he could pull the trigger, a figure shot through the trees at such rapid speed the branches were left whipping at each other. Both Syaoran and Eriol recoiled a step as the woman came to a frantic stop between Syaoran and Eriol's guns.

"Don't!" She cried out as her arms shot outwards at both of them to cease them from firing.

Both Syaoran and Eriol recoiled a step as the took in her appearance. She was covered with blood from her face mask to the bottom of her apron. A wild and possessed look was in her eyes as she stood between the two guns.

Sakura winced as she wondered how this woman could still be alive after she appeared to lose so much blood.

"Get out of the way!" Syaoran barked, not wanting to shoot a woman. He couldn't even distinguish what side she was on.

She didn't move. Her hands and slender, bloodied body stayed rooted to their position, Sakura was so thankful for her bravery that bought them some time.

She turned to Eriol and began to shake her head. "Eriol," She said sternly, "Don't do this."

Eriol's stomach dropped. "Madison?" He said in disbelief. "What happened to you-"

"Lower it!" She said referring to his gun. "Please. Just trust me." She begged.

She needed him to act first, then she'd work on Syaoran. Eriol watched her with hesitance. After a moment stand off his hand dropped slightly to the side, eliminating his side of the threat to Syaoran. Sakura mentally breathed a sigh of relief. She thought she'd explode with the tension.

Tomoyo then turned to Syaoran, arms still outstretched towards him.

Syaoran felt unnerved by this girl whom he didn't recognize. Her bloodied appearance did nothing to calm his suspicion of her.

"Get out of the way." He told her, determined not to let her get in his way of Eriol. "Now!"

Tomoyo's hands shook in front of him. They had been separated by only a few months but Tomoyo felt that her oldest friend had changed so much. She was relieved to see he was alive and safe, but also feared the enraged look in his eye. Did he not recognize her? Had too much time passed? Or did he simply not care? Perhaps he had turned into his father.

Tomoyo's hand moved towards her face; a motion that unnerved Syaoran. She kept her eyes on him as she hooked her finger into her facemask. She peeled it off and looked Syaoran dead on. The skin around her lips was clean. Slowly and cautiously she took a step towards him.

"Don't move." He said with his gun aimed at her now.

Eriol tensed and took a stride towards them.

"Eriol don't." She said calmly and stopping him with her eyes.

He stopped but his heart thumped as he felt helpless. With the danger now on Tomoyo, Eriol felt on edge to intervene. With the amount of blood on her, Eriol battled with the urge to grab her and go had Syaoran's gun not been targeted at her.

Turning back towards Syaoran, she ignored his warning as she stepped towards him.

He didn't shoot, but he was ready in case.

"Syaoran." Tomoyo said as almost a whisper.

Syaoran knitted his brows together as he searched for familiarity in her tanned bloody face. A sharp nudged of recognition hit him. And then he saw.

Behind the frantic, wild hair, the dried blood and the western clothing were a pair of ice-blue eyes that he knew only too well.

Syaoran's lips parted, unable to find words.

Sakura, too, was shocked by the familiarity they seemed to share. She exchanged uneasy looks with Eriol, but didn't dare interrupt.

Syaoran's hands wavered and he lowered the gun away from her. He took a step forward, uneasy and hesitant to get a better look at her.

"T-Tomoyo?" He said, unsure that is could possibly be her. His mind had assumed her dead. Yet here she was.

Again, Sakura and Eriol exchanged looks of uneasiness thinking the same thing.

 _Who is Tomoyo?_

"Syaoran, I can't explain all of this right now." Tomoyo said with urgency. "But this," She looked around her. "This isn't him, OK? You have it wrong. And I can't tell you why right now but please… we" She said gesturing to herself and Eriol. "We have to go. We can't stay here. Please." She begged, aware of precious time escaping them.

"Tomoyo," Syaoran said baffled, unable to get his head around this. He had so many questions. "I don't understand. I thought you…that you…why are you…"

"Syaoran we don't have time. None of this is Eriol's fault. It's not him, OK? Juts let us get out of here-"

"Madison, what is he talking about? How does he know you?" Eriol said and took her wrist, a motion that perplexed Syaoran and made him more eager to protect his friend. But he was confused. Why was Tomoyo dressed like that? Why was she defending him? Had she converted? Was Syaoran losing it?

Sakura stayed silent, keeping an eye on Syaoran's gun which was thankfully, no longer concerned with Eriol.

 _How on earth does he know Madison?_ Sakura asked herself.

"Madison?" Syaoran said confused, wondering if he was having a concussion.

Eriol began to tug on Tomoyo's arm, not liking the time being wasted here, or Syaoran's familiarity with her. Tomoyo placed a hand on his chest to calm him down.

"Tomoyo-"

"Madison, we have to go." Eriol urged which added to Syaoran's confusion.

"Hold it." Syaoran said, remembering the gun in his hand.

"Syaoran, please! You have this wrong. Please just us leave. None of this is what it looks like."

Syaoran felt a wave of dizziness hit him again and balancing on his feet was proving a challenge. He shouldn't let them go. Not Eriol, because he may be involved. And not Tomoyo because…obvious reasons.

"Trust me, Syaoran." She said and begged with her eyes.

Syaoran, paralysed with indecision, lowered his gun.

The rage in his eyes had subsided with Tomoyo's presence. Now, he was just confused.

With the tension defused Sakura thought she could breath a sigh of relief.

Almost.

 _Bang._

The gunshot startled all four of them.

Eriol grabbed Tomoyo and checked for a bullet wound but she was all clear, as was he.

A second gunshot came.

The sound was so near that Sakura's hand shot to her chest to check herself, she was fine. But when her eyes looked up she saw her worst nightmare realize itself in front of her.

Syaoran stood upright with an expression that seemed to not register what had happened. But after a second, the pain pierced him so sharply he couldn't even make a sound.

He fell to his knees.

Tomoyo screamed in shock and recoiled back into Eriol.

Syaoran looked down and saw wet, moist blood begin to spread at an alarming pace around his chest and shoulder. His fingers touched it slightly and were stained crimson.

Sakura's mouth zapped dry as her heartbeat stalled in panic.

 _No…_

"Syaoran…" She whispered in horror.

Behind him, Takashi howled in victory as his fingers giddily reloaded his gun. Seeing Eriol and Tomoyo in danger, Takashi acted.

Syaoran clutched a hand over the wound but knew is was futile as the blood poured out through his fingers.

He looked up; and through his hazy, blurred vision he made out Sakura's wide and panicked eyes, her trembling lips that were trying to say something to him. He tried to reach out to her but felt his body begin to slump forward, not listening to him.

Blood was leaving him at a fast pace.

His thought flashed back to their argument, which seemed a million years ago.

 _Idiot._ He told himself and regretted telling her he was done with her. Of course, he wasn't. He cursed himself for being so stupid, so consumed in his anger and jealousy. He didn't mean it, he never did.

The pain was spreading rapidly now. A million regrets flooding his mind.

 _…_ _.Sa..ku...ra…_

Behind him, Takashi took aim for Syaoran's head.

X x x

 **Thanks for reading guys!**

 **Hoping to update again soon!:)**

X x x

She didn't hear him approach her.

But when she saw him, she was thankful they were alone.

Everything else seemed to fade into the background as her eyes locked with his and a flood of memories consumed her mind. Her breath caught to finally be alone with him after so many years, despite the circumstance.

Toya smirked and swallowed the hatred he had for her just so he could soak up her expression…before he killed her.

She parted her lips and smiled a rare, gentle smile. A butterfly escaped her stomach. His features had altered through the years. He wasn't as she pictured he would be in her mind. He was more rugged, manlier than when she saw him last as a boy.

Kaho didn't remember the last time she felt so elated.

"It's been a while." Toya said with dark eyes full of hatred. Oh, how he's waited for this moment.

Ruby bit her lip and stroked her gun with her thumb. She felt a jolt of glee to hear the deep hatred in his voice.

"Oh, Toya," She said dreamily. "Too long."

Toya clenched his jaw and let his eyes drift from her blood red hair, to her dark brown eyes. Those eyes…he had memorized the evil within them as he swore revenge several years ago.

Kaho smiled, again, she had awaited this moment for years.

She let herself fixate on his dark skin, his chocolate hair, and those intense, blood thirsty eyes. She was excited to hold his face in her hands…

…and watch the light fade from him when she takes his life.

Toya parted his lips.

"I'd like to pick up where we left off."

X x x


	23. Aftermath

**Wow, can't believe I've left such a gap between this chapter and the last...sorry**

 **I've been doing a bit of travelling but honestly, every time I sat down to write, I lost motivation after five minutes. I think I may have burned out a little... :/**

 **But I'm back at it now re-motivated and ready to go!**

 **Please enjoy! :D**

The shot echoed out in Sakura's ears.

Her breath froze as her mind fought against the scene that was happening before her eyes.

The three of the watched in horror as Syaoran's gun slipped from his hand and he slumped down to his knees almost silently.

Tomoyo's mouth dropped open in shock. Her ankles pushed forward and her hand reached out to catch Syaoran before his body completely hit the ground.

Despite the searing pain of her ankle, Sakura shot forward past Tomoyo and caught Syaoran just on time.

"Takeshi, stop!" Eriol shouted when he saw Sakura was now in his line of fire.

Takeshi, who was poised ready to put the final bullet into Syaoran's head paused and looked up confused.

"But…he-"

"Get out of here!" Eriol yelled again, seeing Tomoyo's distraught.

Takeshi did what he was told and scrambled away, feeling deflated that he could not carry out his heroic act of murdering the general's son.

Sakura was oblivious to all of this as her hands desperately tried to cover the bullet wounds on Syaoran's back. Her palms trembled as the blood began to seep through the cracks in her fingers. The warmness of the crimson liquid made her stomach twist with the reality of how bad this was.

 _No, no, no_ she agonized in her mind. _This can't be happening._

Syaoran's head rested on her shoulder, he had not the strength left to support himself. Her sweet smell was a small relief from the agony of pain spreading from his shoulder and chest. Sakura used her small body to keep him upright but she was physically weak and her knees were sinking into the dirt.

"…Sa…" Syaoran began but then began to wheeze and cough in a way that made Sakura's blood run cold. This was not good. No, this was very bad.

"Don't talk." She whispered in his ear and tried to assure herself not to panic. "Save your strength."

Sakura told herself to take control of the situation. But the blood dripping quickly from his wounds was distracting her from forming a coherent thought.

Syaoran wanted to lift his arms and encircle her to show her he was ok. But his body refused to listen to him, he was still in shock from being shot. All he could do was kneel there, helpless to help her. Just…useless.

"I'm…sorry…" he began and she shook her head immediately and embraced him tighter as if he were leaving her.

"Stop." She said firmly and clutched him.

"About this…" He continued. "and…Yukito…"

"Don't." She said with her voice cracking and frustrating her. She swallowed a lump in her throat and narrowed her eyes. He could not see them, but he knew that's what she was doing. She pressed her lips subtly and softly to the side of his slumped head, not caring that Tomoyo and Eriol were witnessing. "It's OK. Be angry with me. Don't talk as if….as if…" She swallowed and somehow kept tears at bay.

 _Don't break now. Don't admit defeat._ She thought, although now sure if she meant that to herself or Syaoran. She didn't want his apology, or anything that would address how serious his injuries were. No, she wanted him angry at her. She wanted to think about the fights they would have in the future, about her, about him, about Yukito, anything. Because that meant he'd still be _here._

 _We'll fight again later, then make up, and we'll look back on this and laugh at how serious we thought this was…_

Tomoyo's hand fluttered to her chest as she watched them. Her lips parted in speculation. The way Sakura was holding onto him for dear life...why would Kinomoto Sakura be so emotionally pulled to that of a soldier, Li Syaoran of all…

Despite the seriousness of the scene, Tomoyo's lip twitched up in a weird smile for a second.

 _I see, an unlikely pair._ She thought and it warmed her to know that Syaoran had finally met a woman to lay down life and limb for.

Tomoyo's eyes quickly flickered from their embrace, the violent spreading of blood around his wounds.

Syaoran suddenly erupted into a violent cough. When she felt specks of blood tickle her collar bone, her heart pounded her chest.

"Don't just stand there!" She barked back at Eriol and Tomoyo, who were whispering about what to do. "Go get help!"

They were both stuck with indecision. This was taking too long for them. They needed to catch that ride back to the West or who knows what the military would do to them…to Tomoyo, the lost princess.

Tomoyo was the first to react and looked up to Eriol. "Eriol, we-"

"No, Madison, we can't." He said reading her mind and keeping his voice low as to not draw Sakura's attention.

He took her by the hand and brought her in close. "It's not just me I'm worried about, it's you. You're not supposed to be a part of this and-"

"But I am." She interrupted and clutched his shirt. "We can get them help _and_ get out."

Tomoyo saw and felt the same urgency he did. Military tanks seemed to be closing in quickly. A knocked out Meiling, Syaoran bleeding out, Tomoyo covered in blood…it didn't spell good news for them, especially Eriol to be caught up in all of it.

"We have to get them help." Tomoyo pleaded with him. Tomoyo looked back at Syaoran. Had he been just another soldier perhaps she wouldn't care. But Syaoran was her friend, her best friend who did so much for her while she was locked up in this palace, letting him die without trying to save him wouldn't be any sort of re-payment.

Eriol clenched his fists but he too was swayed by Sakura's strange passion to save the Lieutenant Colonel. He didn't want to admit it, but he liked Sakura and the work she was trying to do for the west. And looking into Tomoyo's panic filled eyes, he couldn't say no to her.

"OK, if we run into someone, we'll get them help. But we have to leave now."

Tomoyo nodded and turned back to Sakura, who was still clinging on to Syaoran.

"Wait," Syaoran croaked followed by a weak cough.

Tomoyo and Eriol halted mid-step.

With great strength, Syaoran lifted his arms and gripped Sakura by the shoulders. In an unpredicted move he pushed her back and created a cold distance between them.

"Syao-"

"Take her, please." He said and turned her eyes to Eriol.

"No." Sakura said sternly. "I'm staying with you."

"You can't…They're going to…round up anyone they find…maybe…" His arms were trembling with the effort to keep him away from her. He coughed again with more blood escaping his mouth. It was redder and more violent than she thought. "…kill on sight."

Syaoran knew the procedure. Mizuki only needed a few Westerners to make them squeal. Any other survivors would just be a waste of resources. The battlefield was too hectic to distinguish friend from foe. If Sakura was caught in the crossfire….it was a thought Syaoran didn't want to acknowledge.

"Follow her," Syaoran rasped and nodded to Tomoyo. "She knows the way."

Tomoyo nodded. Indeed, she did know the way around this maze of a palace, and probably the only one who could get them out without being seen.

He wanted her in the safe zone the military have probably already established for easterners. As much as it killed him, and as much as he wanted to be selfish and keep her here with him…he had to let her go.

The pain inside him was spreading and throbbing, he wasn't sure if he could make it out of this one.

She suddenly grabbed his hands in anger. "I'm not leaving so stop pushing me away!"

He raised his head, wincing at the effort. "It's not as bad as it looks." He said and attempted to smile but failed.

She took his face into her palms. "You're lying, aren't you?" She whispered and felt her chest tighten.

Again, he tried to laugh but failed and placed a hand over his chest wound. His eyes met Tomoyo's in desperation. She pressed her lips into a hard line and nodded. Sinking to her knees she moved towards Sakura and lightly touched her shoulder in attempt to pry her from Syaoran.

Sakura harshly shrugged her away.

"Just go without me." She said not even looking back at Tomoyo.

Before Tomoyo could reply a deafening bomb went off frighteningly near them. It was followed by a brilliant flash of yellow light. Too sophisticated to be rebel bombs. They were nearing them, cornering what remained of the rebels.

"They're going to destroy everything around here." Syaoran said and clutched her shoulder to make her more aware of the dangers. "You can't stay…"

"Let's take him with us." Tomoyo whispered to Eriol who shook his head.

"He'll slow us down, Madison. Time is working against us."

They could now hear soldier's voices ahead advancing in their direction.

"Well we can't just heave her here!" She said becoming annoyed at his resistance.

Eriol looked ahead at the direction of the military and behind where there was still a slight chance of escape, then at Sakura, who was stubbornly not budging. At this point, it's be a miracle if they made it to the pickup zone.

Before he could talk his mind out of it, Eriol took two huge strides past Tomoyo and stopped behind Sakura.

He made eye contact with Syaoran and with genuine guilt, said. "I'm sorry."

Eriol's arm swooped around Sakura's waist and with one swift move her had pried her away from Syaoran and threw her over his shoulder. Without her physical support, Syaoran fell forward. He shot one arm out to save himself and the other nursed one of the two bullet holes.

With Sakura's arms suddenly void Sakura became enraged and panicked simultaneously.

"Put me down NOW!" She bellowed and clawed at Eriol's back to no use.

Eriol turned back to Syaoran, wincing at the blood pool forming around his soldier's jacket.

"We'll get you help." He said, surprised at himself for suddenly giving a damn about a soldier. But the interaction between him and the screaming woman over his shoulder had humanised Syaoran in Eriol's eyes.

Syaoran could only nod.

"Eriol stop it!" Sakura yelled and kicked desperate to return back to Syaoran.

When Eriol turned to leave Sakura's stomach twisted as the distance between her and Syaoran grew. She began to curse Eriol and Tomoyo with every foul name she knew in Mahr Bretain, too angry to cry.

"Hang on," Tomoyo said and rushed over to Syaoran.

She helped him upright back onto his knees. Tomoyo tore off her maid's apron, folded it hastily and applied it to Syaoran's more severe wounds. She took his hand and placed it over the apron, applying pressure. It was the only thing she could do for hi right now.

"Don't die." She whispered low.

Syaoran nodded. "Same to you."

Without prolonging another second, Tomoyo jumped to her feet. She turned and grabbed Eriol's extended hand. Interlocking her fingers into his, they fled.

Sakura's yells crumbled into a cry as she was carried further away Syaoran.

Her heart tearing as he disappeared behind the trees.

X x x

"I'd like to pick up where we left off."

Kaho bit her lip and tilted her head a fraction to the side, fascinated by the reserved anger in his eyes. Toya had his hand resting and ready on his gun. He thought she hadn't aged a bit in all these years. Everything about Kaho was the same. He was glad. After all these years thirsty for revenge, he didn't want to have to face off against an old, weak woman.

"Toya," She said softly with her lip twitching in excitement. "All this," She gestured in the direction of the chaos. "just so you could come for me?"

Toya tensed at her familiarity with him. She had no right to speak to him like that. He had trained in combat for years, put himself through physical and mental torture so he eventually take her on, and he wanted respect.

This was not like last time.

This time, he was ready for her.

"You are a hard woman to track down." He said through his teeth.

A bolt of electricity shot through her spine. She felt so flattered to have made such a harrowing impression on him all those years ago to warrant this amount of planning.

"Now, now." She purred and took a small step towards him. He didn't move but watched her cautiously. "If you wanted me Toya," She peeled back her jacket to reveal the slick metal of her gun. "All you had to do was ask."

"Enough games, Mizuki." He barked. "We have a score to settle."

Kaho's eyes narrowed in glee to see he still had that passion. "You're right."

In an unexpected move, Toya's tossed his gun to the side. "No guns, I don't want to give you such a merciless death."

Kaho was intrigued and tossed her own gun. Her fingers itched to fight him, to touch his hair, his face, to strangle his neck.

"You know," She said coolly as the circled each other. "I was worried you forgot all about me."

"I tried." He replied, "I tried to forget all about you. I blocked it out, fought it, denied it. But in the end, I'm glad I didn't."

"And why is that?"

"Because hating you has given me new purpose. Revenge had given me the power to get and army, to throw Tomoeda into chaos."

"So, I am to thank for this attack? You give me too much credit."

"You think this is all I can do?" Toya laughed. "This is nothing. After I kill you, I will tear down this government."

"I think you give yourself too much credit."

"These westerners will believe anything I say. I can get them to do what I want."

"Well then, you've become more like your mother than I thought."

Toya's fists clenched. She had no right to speak of Nadeshiko. They circled each other, tightening the distance between them. And only when there was a foot gap between them did Toya attack.

Kaho avoided his fist and shot her elbow up swiftly to meet his jaw. He recovered quickly and caught her wrist mid-air. Toya was almost cocky with gaining the upper hand so quickly and tugged her close to crash his forehead onto hers. Kaho groaned at the shattering pain that rang through her skull. Her heel shot forward to knock Toya down to his knees. Before he could recover she brought her knee up violently to his chin.

He let go of her wrist and cupped his bleeding chin. Kaho shook her head to sharped her vision. She had wildly underestimated him. Though her fought with savagery, his skill surprised him. But just like back then, she would get the better of him.

"Is that all you have? I must say I'm disappointed." She said and brushed loose strands of blood red hair from her face.

Toya breathed heavily as his tongue tasted blood. His mind bullied his body to move. There was no way he could lose. He can't be beaten by her, not after so many years of training.

He dug his heel into the dirt and launched at her. His arms flung around her waist and the crashed into the dirt. Kaho struggled under the weight of him, he had the upper hand physically. Toya clambered up and straddled her, pinning her down.

For the first time, Toya saw a veil of fear descend over Kaho's eyes. She had never been bested before. That look alone justified everything Toya had done to get here.

"I will enjoy this." Toya said with a wicked smile.

His hands gripped tightly around her neck and squeezed. Kaho's limbs began to shake violently and clawed at his face. She gurgled and her mouth gasped for air she couldn't get. The veins in Toya's hands protruded with the force.

"This…is for my mother." He hissed at her.

Her face was turning violet. Kaho's hands ceased their swiping at him and moved towards her trouser pocket, which she could just about reach. Toya heart was beating so heavily with excitement as her body jerked violently.

A sudden burst of pain to his waist snapped him out of his violent trance. He brought his eyes from her face, to the small pocket knife now deeply lodged into his side.

"That's…playing…dirty…" He wheezed.

He tried to ignore the searing pain but the force around her neck was waning. Kaho managed to smirk and twist the knife until Toya gave a loud howl and backed away.

Kaho gulped air and threw her hand around her own neck. Not allowing time to tick by she scrambled forward and pinned down an injured Toya, knife to his neck.

She coughed through the pain in her neck and felt the red bruised bumps on her neck.

"You…didn't say…no knives."

"Bitch!" He spluttered which delighted her.

"Even after all these years…you…you're still…still no match…for me." She pressed the knife in further. "But I have to admit…that was fun."

She ran her hands through his dirty blood-stained hair and felt a squeal of delight knowing his was under her.

Toya was so enraged with himself. How, how could he let this happen?

"Oh, Toya," She said suddenly so concerned. "Why didn't you tell me you were injured?" she pressed her fingers against the cuts and grazes he attained from earlier in the night. She pressed her finger against a badly bandaged wound. Toya winced as a tear from pain rolled down his cheek. She caught it before it could disappear and in a move that made him shutter, she brought it to her lips and tasted it.

She glanced at her finger, now covered with his blood and shook her head to herself.

"No, this won't do." She said dissatisfied. He was not in his peak form to take her on. He was too injured and it didn't feel right. And besides…she didn't want it to be over yet. She would drag this out as far as she could.

"I could bring you back to base with me. But they'd just lock you up and interrogate you, torture you…we wouldn't be alone anymore…" Her knife loosened around his throat.

She brought her face inches from his. "I'm going to pull my people from the south east exit, make your escape there."

"Fuck you…why would I trust you?"

She grazed the back of her fingers against his cheek. "Because when I _do_ kill you, I don't want to be burdened about the fairness of it. Go back to your savages, recover and think about how this is the second time you have failed." She smirked. "And when you're ready. Come find me." She whispered.

She moved away. "Oh, and you can have this," She said gesturing towards her knife, "as a souvenir of your failure." She brought it up high and plunged it down through his open palm.

Toya threw his head back in pain and screamed. He looked over towards his palm, the knife anchoring him to the ground. He tried to pull it out but found he did not have the strength.

Kaho backed away and place her cap back on.

"Until next time." She said and coolly walked away, Toya still shrieking at both the pain all over his body and the brutal pain of defeat.

X x x

Yue crossed his arms tightly to keep himself from shaking.

From his expression you would assume he was calm as ever, but inside, his stomach twisted and knotted.

He was freaking out.

He glanced around him at the safe zone where guests were being evacuated and escorted back to their respective sides of the wall. Medical care had finally arrived and evacuees were being tended to. Yue looked up to see the palace in the distance sitting behind shadows of smoke. The military were everywhere now.

And Toya had now made it to the exit point yet.

 _Why didn't he escape yet?...What's keeping him._

Yue tried to remain calm but his mind was conjuring up all sorts of scenarios. Had the military caught him? Did he indeed escape after all? Or worst of them all...did he…was he….

He was distracted by a woman shouting nearby.

"My husband is still in there!" She cried as military were shoving her into the back of a van heading west. Ruby tried in vain to break free but she was too weak. Why hadn't Eriol followed them back yet? Where was he?

"Please," She begged. "Please just check and see if he's still there."

The soldiers paid no attention to her and slammed the back of the vans door in her face.

For some reason the woman's panic heightened Yue's own. He couldn't wait around any longer. He marched over to the heavily guarded South entrance.

"Sir, this is a no entry-"

"Get the fuck out of my way." Yue said with controlled anger. The solder clamped his mouth shut and stepped aside. Yue was known to the military and perhaps one of very few who went where he pleased.

Yue tried to restrain his legs from breaking into a panicked run.

 _Toya…please…don't die…_

X x x

They took a left, then several rights and u-turns before she had to admit, Tomoyo was lost.

"I'm sorry." She said with her voice breaking. "I thought it was this way but...but…"

"Madison, it's fine." He said and cupped her face. "We'll figure it out, let's just keep heading straight, we'll eventually have to make it out."

She leaned into his hand, a moment that would have been soothing had Sakura not been shouting and screaming since they left Syaoran. Eriol still had her over his shoulder and she had not stopped struggling since.

He rolled his eyes. "She needs to shut up or I swear."

"Put her down for a second." Tomoyo said.

"Are you sure?"

"Put her down." Tomoyo said sternly.

He lowered Sakura onto the ground and before she could utter a word Tomoyo's hand swiped across her cheek so sharply that Eriol took a step back in shock. Sakura's mouth hung open in shock.

"Listen." She said in a stern voice. "Get a hold of yourself! We didn't want to leave Syaoran either but we have to. We know Syaoran needs help and we will do our best but you have to stop screaming."

Sakura touched the red mark now glaring on her cheek.

"If we get caught," She said looking over to Eriol. "That's it for us do you understand!?"

Sakura brought her hands to her cheeks to cool the down. Her head was dizzy and her heart still pumping. Sakura gulped and nodded despite the urge to limp back. She knew in her heart Tomoyo was right. But she felt sick to her core agonizing over the fact that her last image of Syaoran was bloody.

Tomoyo looped her arm around Sakura's waist and helped her up.

As Tomoyo looked around and tried to regain her sense of direction, a rustle to their left startled them. The instinct was to run in the opposite direction but it became apparent that they were surrounded.

About a dozen soldiers or so soldiers emerged from the trees and enclosed them into a tight circle. Eriol stool in front of Tomoyo and Sakura although there was nothing that could be done to help them.

"Oh good," came a voice that made Eriol's spine shutter.

Kaho Mizuki emerged from the shadows, a cigarette lit in her hand. "I was worried you died." She said to Eriol.

Despite the bruising on her face and the raw marks on her neck, Mizuki seemed extremely calm and tranquil. Her eyes flicked to the soldier to her right and he nodded. Within a second, two men approached Eriol and landed violent punched to his face.

Eriol didn't go down so easy but eventually fell to his knees.

"Stop it!" Tomoyo yelled. "Please we just want to get out. The Lieutenant Colonel needs medical aid by the west palace grounds and-" she was assaulted across the face but the butt of a rifle. Sakura caught her as she fell backwards.

Mizuki clenched her jaw. _That bastard son of the General, always causing me trouble._ She thought and soured.

Had he not been the General's son, Mizuki would have left him to die. But the consequences of which would reap dire results for Mizuki. She signalled two soldiers to head in the direction of Syaoran, if he didn't bleed out by then…

"Stop it!" Sakura flared without regard for her own safety.

A soldier made a move to silence her. "Not her!" Mizuki suddenly barked which froze the soldier to his place. "Idiot." Mizuki spat and put out her cigarette. She pushed aside the soldier in front of Sakura and knelt down.

Mizuki stared down at Sakura with both curiosity and distain. Sakura's face hardened, unthreatened by Mizuki's ranking. Mizuki felt lucky to have met the two Kinomoto children in one night. Sakura's eyes held the same hatred as Toya's, she thought. But there was something more…righteous in Sakura's whereas Toya's held pure hatred and begrudgery. Sakura's had something more defiant than Toya's. It worried Mizuki. Her eyes were like Nadeshiko's. And Mizuki knew all too well the destruction that could bring.

"Funny." Mizuki said with a slight smirk. "How is it that you are always around when trouble strikes?"

"I guess I'm just lucky." She replied with trembling anger.

"You do know I can kill you now? Don't you?" She threatened, not liking the defiance in Sakura's voice. "There was a lot of cross fire. It'd be easy to make it look like an accident." Mizuki said, hoping it would stir a panic in her. It didn't. Sakura face remained neutral and hard. That annoyed her.

"But I won't, because you are useful to us."

"There is nothing I could possibly do for you." Sakura said through gritted teeth.

"Oh? I think there is." She purred and in a swift move grabbed a clunk of Sakura's hair by the back of her neck and brought her close to her face. "The next time I read the Tomoedan Mirror's so-called _'Western Wonders',_ I hope to happy, if you know what I mean?"

Sakura balled her fists and trembled in sudden anger. "I'm not playing any part in a cover up." She said, narrowing her eyes.

"Are you sure?" Mizuki looked over and nodded. The soldiers grabbed Eriol's shoulders and raised him up. They continued to beat him until he was too weak to make a sound anymore.

Despite this, Sakura remained silent. It killed her to see Eriol suffer because of her, but she knew how strongly he felt for their cause.

"Sakura winced and looked away. "Wait…" She said, unwilling to let Eriol suffer anymore.

"No, Sakura don't." Eriol rasped.

"Well?" Mizuki prodded.

"Like I said. I'm not covering for you."

"Fine." She said and shrugged.

Suddenly Tomoyo was grabbed and the abuse was about to be transferred onto her. Eriol struggled against the restraint of the soldiers. Tomoyo was thrown onto the ground.

"No, wait don't!" Eriol roared.

 _I can stop it._ Tomoyo thought. If they knew who she was, could she overpower Mizuki? It could backfire, they could just kill her, or them all instead. Tomoyo didn't get much time to think about it as something blunt crushed the back of her head. She didn't lose consciousness but her mind went blurry.

"Fine." Sakura said with her lungs aching. As much as it pained her, she couldn't let them suffer at the hands of her resistance.

Mizuki smiled, glad she broke her. It seemed Sakura was not like Toya, she had a conscience, a moral compass, it'd be easier to break her instead of Toya. "I'm glad to hear that."

She stood up and signalled the soldiers attention. "Please escort these two back to the west. I'm sure they're very tired." She said with a bored expression on her face.

"But, Lieutenant General," One of them protested. "Shouldn't we at least arrest him?"

"If I wanted to, then I would have said so." She replied annoyed.

They didn't dare talk back to her and carried a beaten Eriol out into the clearing. Tomoyo followed and nursed her head and fought back tears.

Mizuki knew it was not Eriol solely responsible for tonight. But she also knew how to break men like him. She'd let him watch as she tore down his village one person at a time and he would have to watch on hopelessly and unable to do anything about it. Men like him destroy themselves with guilt.

As for the real mastermind behind this, Toya…

Her stomach fluttered. He'd come back for her. And when he does he'll drag out every savage with him, and that's when she'd annihilate them all.

"What about her?" He asked Mizuki.

Mizuki looked back at Sakura, who was struggling to her feet.

Mizuki walked closely to her and seemed to assist her until her nails dug into Sakura's arm. "I can't prove that you knew of Toya's plan, or that you even know of his existence, but when I do…" She smiled and brought her hands to Sakura's cheek. "I'll finish all of you off, like what should have happened fifteen years ago."

Before Sakura could reply, Mizuki tossed her over to a soldier. "Get her to the safe zone."

Mizuki dusted her hands off, weariness of the night flooded in. She began to question letting Toya go, letting Sakura go.

 _No,_ she thought. _Let them think they're safe for now. I'll find them all._

"Let's rap this up." She commanded.

X x x

Her shouts began to fade as Eriol carried her deeper into the forest.

He was relieved she was escaping, but Syaoran couldn't ignore the selfish possessiveness in him that wanted her to stay with him. He hissed as the throbbing pain inside him spread and deepened. Syaoran had been injured before, but never as bad as this. The likelihood of surviving was becoming more like wishful thinking.

In the clarity of his mortality, he began to think of all the things he should have done right. He shouldn't have turned a blind eye to the wrong doings of the military or his father. He thought he was different, that he was not a part of the injustice, but he was only kidding himself. Staying out of combat, threading the line of right and wrong, all these things were the actions of a coward afraid to stand up to his father.

But his biggest regret, was failing Sakura.

In his final moments he could see that his idea of 'protecting' her, was merely a charade to stop her. Because he was afraid. Afraid of her fearlessness, afraid of her resistance, afraid she would succeed in her mission, and afraid he'd lose her in the process.

He began to cough violently, he felt flecks of blood escape his mouth.

Tomoeda was at a crossroads. Either side was a violent one. Syaoran had stood between them and never chose. And as bad and brutal as Meiling was, at least she had a side. Where was Syaoran?

He looked up at the castle towering above him, he could still smell the smoke from fires that still raged among the palace grounds, still hear the popping of guns somewhere in the distance. Another explosion went off dangerously close to him. The military were close and taking down everything in their sights. A part of the palace wall collapsed and heavy lumps of brick slammed down near him. He was so glad he got Sakura out of there. No doubt if these bullet wounds didn't kill him, the military probably would accidentally.

Syaoran didn't want this Tomoeda.

And it was a shame that in his final moments, Syaoran had finally picked his side, and it was where she was.

 _I wish I could tell her that._ He thought. _I wish…wish I could…._

A stir ahead of him interrupted his thoughts.

Meiling had regained consciousness. She groaned and winced at the bursting pain at the back of her head.

"Wh-what's…ugh…" She slurred.

Her voice stirred some rage in Syaoran and sharpened his thought.

 _Meiling…_ he raged mentally. He remembered Chiharu and all the other bodies of teenagers who were caught in a battle they were not trained or ready for under Meiling's tyranny. If Syaoran was going to die, she was coming with him.

Syaoran groaned and he somehow managed to drag himself onto his feet.

She wasn't going to get away with this. If the military rescued her, she'd face no consequences, not if Mizuki was involved. Syaoran pushed past the pain and staggered towards her with his last remaining strength. His hand reached out for her gun.

Dragging himself towards her, Meiling quickly realized what he was doing. She tried to crawl away but he grabbed her leg. They were both too weak and disorientated for combat. Syaoran's vision was failing him and panic was stalling Meiling's motor skills.

"You're actually going to kill me?" She said with slight mockery.

"You've had it coming Meiling." He replied, surprised at the strength of his own voice.

"You…you won't do it. You don't have it in you. You never did." She mocked. "There's a reason the General shows no pride in you, Syaoran. A reason why you're an embarrassment." She threw every sore spot she knew she could hit, but Syaoran's expression didn't change. She swallowed as his sudden change.

"For once, Meiling. I don't give a shit."

"Looks like just before you bleed out, you've finally found a pair. How convenient." She laughed.

Syaoran pointed the gun at her forehead. The strength to which, was causing blackouts in his vision. His finger pulled the trigger and Meiling winced, expecting the impact. But there was nothing. The gun was empty.

 _Damn it!_ Syaoran fumed and threw it angrily away.

He keeled over and clutched his wounds. He was not going to make it, and he couldn't even take Meiling with him.

He thought he was hallucinating the sounds of footsteps coming towards them from the trees.

"Found him, over here!" He thought he heard a voice say, followed by several others.

Whether or not they were friend of foe, Syaoran didn't know. Regardless, he felt there was not much left of him to save. His body slumped over, he didn't even feel the grounds hit him.

Darkness began to fully descend over his eyes and in those last minutes before consciousness left him, he thought of her.

 _Sakura…_

He pictured her face, smiling, laughing, and her eyes teemed with emotions she only ever let him witness.

If he had another chance, he'd do it right…

…He'd do it right by her…

X x x

Yue had never felt panic like this in his life.

He tore through the palace grounds with no idea as to where he was going. His mind was driving him to the point of insanity thinking or the worst possible scenario's. If the military found Toya and arrested him, was there anything Yue could do? What if they killed him? If that was the case, Yue would take his own life.

He told himself to stop thinking like this, as if Toya was already dead. He tore his and through his hair, his hands began to sweat from exhaustion and panic.

Yue found himself coming into a small clearing a little outside the palace grounds. What he found was nothing short of a miracle.

"Toya," He breathed with great relief and threw himself over to where Toya's body was lying. Toya was lying upwards and pinned to the ground by a knife lodged through his palm. Yue winced at the sight and with great force, pulled it free. Toya winced and gave a small cry at the pain.

Yue threw it away and cradled Toya's beaten face to his chest. The contact alone could had sent Yue into tears. He was alive, he was safe. Thank God.

"I thought they killed you." Yue breathed and brushed his finger threw Toya's wet hair. "I was going out of my mind with worry. Where were you?"

Toya did not register the same relief or desire to see his love as Yue did. Yue tried not to be upset about that. Instead of reflecting the same concern and love as Yue did, Toya's eyes were brimming with anger and hate and glared at the sky.

"Toya…?"

"She got away." He said in a deep, seething voice.

"Who did?"

"…Kaho." He said and banged his good hand against the ground. "I had her, Yue. I had her and that bitch got away. I failed."

Yue continued to tenderly stroke his face and said nothing. His face was calm, but inside he was beginning to fume. He hated Toya's obsession with that _woman._ His seemingly lifelong mission of revenge was something Yue tried to ignore. But here it was, again.

"It doesn't matter, Toya. As long as you're safe."

"I was so close, I let my guard down." His anger had defused into a defeated, bitter tone.

"Toya…" Yue said in a tired voice which finally caught Toya's attention. He lifted his hand to Yue's face.

"I'm sorry. You shouldn't have come for me." Toya said to sooth his worries. "That wasn't part of the plan."

Yue leaned into his hand. "Neither was you going rogue. Toya…if she killed you, what am I supposed to do without you?" Yue was angry at Toya's disregard for his own life just for the pursuit of Kaho's.

"I'm sorry. I got carried away." He smiled softly and Yue caved. This was what always happened. But Yue knew all too well that given the chance again, Toya'd go after Kaho. And each time Toya did, Yue questioned if he was really loved, or being used.

But time and time again, Yue would not leave his side.

"We need to leave." Yue said and helped him up.

"Take the south east exit." Toya said begrudgingly going with Kaho's advice. He hated how he was playing into her games.

"Why did she keep you alive?" Yue asked, although afraid of the answer.

Toya frowned and the hatred returned dangerously to his eyes. "I'm sure we'll find out."

They hobbled to the south east exit where three rebels and a van were waiting for Toya. Yue was constantly astounded by the loyalty these men had for Toya, who saw them as disposable.

"Please contact me when you get back." Yue begged, already knowing that Toya would be too busy planning his revenge to do so.

Toya nodded and brought him into a closed embrace. "Don't worry, Yue." Toya said soothingly and kissed the side of his neck. Yue relaxed, confident that Toya did care about them, he truly did love Yue and-

"We won't let them away next time. Next time I'll be ready, no matter what."

Yue frowned into his chest and bit his lip. That was the last thing he wanted to hear. As Toya broke away, Yue was left with the cold distance that was all too familiar to him. Toya didn't look back as the door closed.

And Yue waited and watched as the van pulled away, making its sly escape back into the west.

He lit a cigarette. But before he caressed it in his lips he heard a spine-chilling scream in the distance.

X x x

The evacuation zone looked more like a bad night at an ER.

All around her, easterners were begging to be medically examined, or brought home or walking around with painful anxiety, waiting to be reunited with loved ones if they were still alive.

Looking back at the castle, Sakura saw the fires being put out and the palace grounds littered with military.

She looked down at her own bloodied hands. They began to shake. She thought she could still feel herself clutching Syaoran's body, desperately attempting to seal the bullet wounds.

"Syaoran…" She whispered to herself and felt so helpless on the outside. She prayed Mizuki stuck to her words and found him, alive. Instead of giving into sadness and tears, she felt a rage inside her. Not for the military, not for the rebels who carried equal responsibility for tonight, but for Toya.

She balled her fists and cursed herself for once again feeling so weak against him in a moment where she knew he was wrong. Then she was reminded, he was going to hit her. He was like a possessed man, not her brother.

She needed answers.

Sakura scanned the wounded and found herself very lucky. A nurse was holding a towel to a wounded easterner. But he was no easterner, she recognized him as one of the men who ditched her back in the woods of the palace. One of Toya's loyal men.

She approached them. "I'll take of him." Sakura said in a voice that was too calm and sweet." The nurse was thankful and scurried off to take care of others.

The man looked up at Sakura with frightened eyes. "Are you going to rat me out?" He asked. "I didn't know what to do so I just followed the easterners and-"

Sakura shushed him and faked a smile whilst damping the towel on his head. She said nothing but placed her right hand to stroke the side of his face. He was confused but relieved she didn't seemed annoyed at his earlier behaviour towards her.

Her hand turned nasty and suddenly pinched and twisted his ear like her teachers use to do to her when she spoke out of turn or questioned Utopian values at her junior high school.

His mouth opened to yell but she glared him into silence.

"Why is Toya doing this?" She hissed.

He squirmed which made her pinch him tighter. "Ah...ah- I don't know I was just following orders-"

"You don't blow up a castle and murder innocent people just because you were 'following orders' _Why_ is he doing this?"

"Ah I swear I don't really know. He just wanted attention from the rest of Tomoeda. He wanted to kill the royal family but-"

"He _what_?"

"Yeah…ah…uh…but the plan failed. He wants an all-out war in Tomoeda."

Sakura gulped, stunned at the extent her brother was willing to go through. In her mind, her worst fears were confirmed.

"Why does he want a war? What is he gaining from it?"

"I swear I honestly don't know! He keeps going on about destruction and starting over and chaos and politics and stuff…I mean…I was in it at the start but now….ah…now it's gone so far I…I just want to go home." He said and Sakura actually began to feel sorry for the boy. He couldn't have been more than eighteen, brainwashed into thinking he was fighting for a solution.

Sakura released him.

The boy rubbed his raw red ear and pouted.

"You and your brother…you're both alike." He said.

Sakura's blood went cold at that statement. "We're nothing alike." She refuted, sad at the very fact.

"You could have fooled me." He left Sakura with that comment.

Sakura didn't know what her next move was. She didn't even know how she could possibly get home.

"Sakura!" She heard a voice call her. Looking over her shoulder she was shocked to see Yukito running towards her. It dawned on her then that she never took a second to wonder if Yukito had made it out ok.

"Yukito, you're safe." She said.

He had seemed to escape with a few cuts and grazes but nothing life-threatening.

"Oh, Sakura. Thank God. I thought that maybe…that you…"

"I'm fine." She said and tried to stand up. "Why are you still here?"

"I couldn't just leave not knowing where you were. I looked everywhere for you, asked every soldier in sight." Sakura tried to find the insincerity or ulterior motive behind his words. But it seemed that Yukito, surprisingly enough, was concerned for her. It was probably the nicest thing Yukito has ever done in his life.

Sakura swallowed, she had no energy to brush off his concerns. "Thank you, Yukito…really. Thank you." She said.

"You're hurt." He said and helped her up. "It's crazy around here. We should go-"

"No." She protested. "I-I'm going to stay around for a little bit."

"Sakura are you insane? Look around, this place isn't safe. What do you need to stay for?"

She opened her mouth but said nothing. How could she possibly explain that she couldn't leave not knowing if Syaoran was OK?

"You two!" Barked a soldier near them. "If you don't need medical aid then leave the castle grounds. There are buses heading back to the East-"

"It's ok, sir. I have my car."

"Then use it! We're already over-crowded."

"Sakura, come on. We can't stay." Yukito said urgently. "By now this news would have reach the East. Your father must be worried sick."

Sakura gasped at the thought of her father at home, tearing his hair out with worry.

"You're right. Let's go." She said as much as it killed her to do so.

Yukito helped her limp away from the madness and when she looked back she bit her lip to stop herself from succumbing to tears knowing that somewhere in the billowing mess, Syaoran was there…

…dead or alive.

X x x

Mizuki sighed.

 _This is not good._ She thought.

"Well…is he dead?" She asked.

She didn't need them to answer. The blood surrounding his body was a clear indicator.

"Two bullets in the back, Lieutenant General. Still a slight pulse but he needs medical attention ASAP but…"

Mizuki squeezed her temples. She would be blamed for this. A dead General's son. Beside Syaoran, Meiling was barely conscious, unable to answer questions.

"And what of the royal family?"

"Alive. Queen and King were found unharmed. The Prince was found unconscious on the Princesses bed. The found the body of the Queens maid in the bath. Seems like she was murdered."

"The maid was murdered…but no harm to the family?" Mizuki asked. "Could the Prince have done it in self-defence?

"The Prince has some blood on him, but it doesn't seem linked to him. The maid was murdered by an outsider it seems, violently at that. Whoever it was, really wanted her dead. We have no suspects at the moment."

Mizuki was disturbed by this news.

Syaoran was rolled onto a stretcher, he didn't stir.

X x x

Yukito had carried Sakura all the way back to the car.

Her mid bounced from anger to despair like a pendulum with thoughts of Toya and Syaoran.

"God, you really don't know how scary it was, Sakura, I almost got shot twice!" Yukito babbled for the fifth time in the past twenty minutes. All his sincerity, although appreciated had disappeared into self-bragging about his 'near-death' experience. "I mean, and did I tell you I helped an old woman-"

"find her grandson. Yes, Yukito, you told me." Sakura tried not to sound aggravated, but Yukito's experience tonight didn't even compare to hers.

Sakura told herself that this would be the last time she would have contact with Yue ever again. For many reasons. She would let him take her home, because there wasn't many other options, but then…they were done.

"And the whole time, you were in the evacuation zone?"

"Yes." Sakura lied and put on her seatbelt.

But despite the absolute terror of the night, Yukito was buzzing with what felt like overcoming death. He was jittery, felt brave and heroic even. He couldn't understand it. Tonight's events were the most intense, adrenaline pumping night of Yukito's rule-abiding, safe life. And he managed to find Sakura too. Oh, Fujitaka will love him for that. His blood was pumping.

"You are OK?" He asked and placed a hand on her knee.

She didn't bat it away like she usually did, she didn't even notice. Her eyes glanced out the window, blank with her mind agonizing over her next move. She didn't want to leave, but there wasn't anything she could do here. And without a phone, her father would collapse in worry.

"Yes." She replied and looked at him kindly, thankful he did wait on her. She didn't want to get into a fight with him now. She just wanted to get home, to hold Nathala's diary as if it held the answers.

Yukito's heart was racing from adrenaline. The kind sincerity in her eyes, meant to be thankful, was taken up differently in Yukito's eyes. Is it possible, she sees him differently now? He technically saved her tonight…right?

And when he started the car and took off for the East, he felt a strange sensation taking over. When the raid started, he thought he would never make it out alive. So many regrets came to him in those moments. So much time wasted waiting for 'ideal moments' and perfect opportunities. No, he needed to take what he wanted from life now, and not when it's too late.

Sakura snapped out of her thoughts when she noticed the car slowing down. They were barely out of the palaces sight, parked a few meters from the deserted South East exit. Yukito killed the engine and all went silent. His heart was beating rapidly, dizzy on its own bravery. He side glanced her, he saw a thin layer of sweat glisten on her chest, her torn skirt, now rising high, he hardened at the inappropriate thoughts going through his mind.

"Yukito, why have we stopped?" Sakura asked in a small voice.

Yukito unbuckled his belt, a move that sent panic shocks through Sakura. She looked around outside but the road was isolated.

"Sakura," He began in an authoritative voice that she hadn't heard from him before. "Tonight, I stared death in the face."

Sakura blew air from her lips and tried not to roll her eyes. She wasn't in the mood to comfort Yukito's trauma right now.

"And I know now, more than ever what I want, and what's meant to be."

Sakura squeezed her temples, feeling a migraine coming. "And what's that, Yukito?"

He turned slowly to her and with heavy breathing, answered; "Us."

"Us?" She said in a confused voice.

"Marry me." He said in a voice that was panicked and forceful. Had this night not been traumatic enough, she was sure she would burst out laughing. Instead she closed her eyes and sighed.

"Please just take me home, Yukito." She replied coldly.

Yukito narrowed his eyes, angry she wasn't taking him seriously. How can she dismiss him?

"Sakura, I'm serious!" He shouted and grabbed her hands into his. She recoiled back but he tugged her forcefully forward. "Just marry me! You know in the end it makes sense! You and I, we'll transfer into the North and-and we'll just start again. Fuck the Easterners! We're both better than that, and you can escape your family's reputation-"

"Yukito, you're hurting me." She said in a shaky but stern voice. "Let go and take me home."

"Not until you answer me." He spluttered.

"Fine then! No! No, I won't marry you!" She snapped. "Not now, not in a million years would I ever, _ever_ be with you! I would rather be relocated and tortured in the west for the rest of my life!"

"You're just saying that! You just want to seem tough, but Sakura," He said in a calm and almost patronizing voice, "you don't have to be like that around me. You can trust me and I'm going to protect you from things like tonight-"

"I don't need your protection Yukito!"

"Sakura, I love you and you love me. You know it and that's why you always come back to me."

"What the are you talking about 'always come back to you'?" She tried to tear her hands from his grip but he held on tight.

"What do you think I'm talking about? At college, you came onto _me._ You wanted to go back to my place and-"

"A one-night stand, Yukito, a drunken mistake which I'm still paying for now-"

"I know you took that job at 'Happy Books' to get my attention, why else would you work for _my_ grandmother? And when you came to that pharmacy, I know you just wanted an invite but you chose _me_. You're always looking for ways to find me, you just don't want to admit it!"

"Stop it!" She screamed as tears of anger flooded her eyes. "Stop it! I don't love _you_. I don't want to be with you-" Sakura cut herself off when she noticed Yukito's face suddenly drop. Did she finally get through to him? His blank face then became puzzled.

"What do you mean, 'I don't love _you_?'" Yukito said slowly and sceptically.

"It means I don't have feeling for you. Is that not what I obviously mean?"

"Yes…but…you stressed ' _you_ '. You didn't say, 'I don't love you.' You said, 'I don't love _you_ '."

Sakura's heart began to race as things took a dark turn. And before she could correct herself he spoke.

"There's someone else, isn't there?" He said now full of accusation.

Sakura remained silent, not sure if she even had the strength to start denying it. Instead she looked away as Syaoran's face came into her mind followed by her chest tighten.

"I'm right, aren't I?" Yukito hissed and balled his fists. "Someone at the party tonight, wasn't it? Someone not from the East. That…that westerner guy you were talking to? Or the old guy or- God, Yue? That's why you wanted to go, isn't it?"

"What does it matter, Yukito?" She said in a tired voice. "You wanted an answer, I gave you one. You and I, we're nothing, never will be." She felt like she was saying that not just to Yukito, but for Syaoran's sake.

Yukito began to shake his head. He was dizzy, feeling his opportunity to be with her slip his grasp. The finality of her words stabbed him in the chest. He made a bold move to try to recover something, anything from his fading idyllic future.

He threw himself forward and kissed her violently, painfully even. Sakura, taken by surprise, felt herself being pushed back and the back of her head slammed against the wind shield. Yukito moved before she could react. He was desperate, desperate to convince and convey how much he wanted her. In his mind, she'd kiss him back, let down her guard and finally realize it was just logical to be with him.

But when Yukito sensed her struggle and resist against him, panic gripped him.

"Stop…it...get…OFF!" She screamed and wormed underneath him.

Yukito panicked but didn't release her. Why wasn't she cooperating? Why did she resist him .time? He realized, to his horror, she really didn't want him. It was as if his years of denial had finally clicked. He told himself they always had a chance, he just needed to be persistent and she'd eventually give in. But, no...it seemed she wouldn't.

He was out of tactics, out of possibilities, and so then, Yukito became angry.

His grip on her became tighter and he pushed her seat back and climbeb over her. Sakura's blood ran cold as she realized where this could be heading to. She turned her head away so his lips couldn't stay on hers. His rough hands reached up her skirt to touch the skin he hadn't felt in years. He wanted the memories of their night together to be relived, he decided he'd make that happen.

Sakura fought against him as best as she could but despite his small frame, he was stronger than her.

"Bitch," He cussed onto her neck. "Fucking ungrateful slut. You think you can do better than me?" She heard him unzip his pants and she began to flail. He seized her moment of panicked and positioned himself between her legs.

"You think _you_ can do better than _me_?" he spat. "I was the only one who pitied you after what your father done. I cared enough to make an honest woman of you. You'll regret saying no to me, eventually."

 _No, no,no, get out of this Sakura, don't let this happen._ Sakura threw her hands up to find something to club him with but there was nothing. He fingertips felt the cold metal of the back-seat door handle. She gripped it and pulled, the door swung open and she screamed into the night air.

"Shut up!" He growled and covered her mouth. He reached over to close the door again. Sakura used this opportunity to jerk her knee upward to his groin. Yukito collapsed in the sudden pain and Sakura slipped out between his legs. She hauled her body onto the grass and dirt and clawed her way out, the pain of her sprained ankle weighed her down.

She could hear Yukito recovering. She knew he was preparing to go after her. Her body was shaking as she tried to get to her feet. She looked back, but Yuktio was nowhere to be seen.

She held her breath and looked around panicked. Where did he go? Then there was the sound of a scuffle behind the car. She ducked down and saw Yukito being knocked to the ground by someone else.

Sakura held her breath, fearing it was a soldier. Yukito held his face in his palms and rolled over. The other person dropped to their knees and lay his fists to the side of Yukito's head so many times Sakura lost count.

Yukito whimpered a plea of mercy which was heard. The other man stood up and was silent. When Yukito looked up at his attacker, his face screwed up in disgust.

"You…fucking…bastard." Yukito spat out some blood and rolled to his knees.

"Go crawl back to your side of the wall." The man said in a low and dangerous voice.

Yukito looked over to where Sakura was and gave her an acidy glare. "You had your chance. Don't be surprised what I'll do." He threatened and scampered into the driver's seat.

The engine rattled to life and skitted away. Sakura kept her head down. Her heart punching her chest so hard she could barely hear the man's footsteps come closer. He had saved her, or was he going to do worse?

He stopped in front of her. And when she brought her eyes up to meet his foggy grey ones, she almost burst into tears of relief.

"Yue…"

Yue kneeled down, fists bloodied and touched her cheek. The kindness of that touch was more than what she needed and she threw her arms around his neck and let her body sink into him. Yue froze with the contact and fought the natural urge to shrug himself free.

She was trembling. And had he not heard her scream and come to her, he didn't want to think about what his sick cousin would do. In the moment of discovering them, Yue was overcome with a strong will to protect her Not just because she was his lovers sister, but because he cared for her, as much as he denied it.

Yue said nothing and awkwardly wrapped his lanky arms around her and pressed his cheeks against the top of her head, overcome with relief she was safe.

For the longest time, they just sat there in each other's comfort, grateful for each other, but at the same time, thinking about their lovers, Syaoran and Toya, and what would become of them…

X x x

It was a painfully long trip back to the west.

Tomoyo held Eriol's bleeding head on her lap and bit her lip to muffle the flashbacks of the night that had just past. Eriol drifted in and out of consciousness, panic comforted by the loving touch of Tomoyo's blood crusted fingers.

Mrs Hiirigazawa had waited up for them, almost collapsing in relief to see them both battered but alive. It took her a while and strong meds to calm Ruby to sleep and Tomoyo was thankful Mrs. Hiirigazawa was too exhausted to lecture them for not leaving when the rest did. She simply held her son tightly and stroked Tomoyo's cheek, the affection made Tomoyo's chest swell.

Tomoyo now stood in the cold bathroom, unable to bring herself to move.

A flash of red punched her brain, making her gasp and jolt. She looked down at Layla's blood. The image of plunging the knife had tormented her mind over and over again. Her stomach lurched. She knew she had to do it, but she knew now that she had killed, she'd never be the same.

Her chest stung as she fought back tears and the thoughts that compelled her to stay at the palace, to embrace her mother and apologize for everything.

But here she was, on the wrong side of the walls, doing wrong things.

A hand tapped her shoulder and she jumped.

Eriol placed his hands on her shoulders and soothed her.

She brought her hand to her mouth to muffle a cry. She almost lost him tonight, too. Her fingers touched his bruised cheek. Without him…she truly didn't know where she stood.

Eriol caressed her cheek, his own mind whispering the same thoughts and fear. And within her icy blue eyes he knew after tonight, there were more secrets to her than he could ever imagine. Those secrets were eating her slowly from the inside out and he didn't know how he could stop it.

Tomoyo stood paralysed in her own emotions, unable to think or make a move.

Eriol's fingers moved from her cheek to the knot of her apron, which was caked with blood, not hers, though. That he knew, but didn't ask. He undid it and lifted it over her head. Slowly he undid the buttons of her dress and she let it fall to the floor. The motions had no lustful intent but were delicate and loving in a way that made Tomoyo once again thank the unseen forces that kept him alive. He peeled her bra and underwear off to reveal her milky white skin untouched from the violence of the night, bar a few cuts and grazes.

Eriol walked over and turned on the shower. The noise of water hitting tile made Tomoyo shudder. He took her hand and led her under the water like a child. As soon as the warm water spilled over her hair, it turned red and swirled around the drain. Tomoyo stood there, eyes closed. Eriol stripped himself and joined her.

She let go and tears spilled over uncontrollably, muted by the shower. Eriol didn't ask what was wrong, there was no point. He ran his hands through her scalp, delicately scrubbing the last molecule of Layla's blood from her body. She leaned her forehead into his chest and cried, wishing she could tell him everything, but knew her burden was something that no one, especially Eriol would understand.

When the water finally ran clear, he cupped her face into his hands and kissed her softly. In the moments he thought Mizuki would shoot him, his thoughts had flown to Tomoyo, not Ruby. He saw the life they could have together and cursed that he had not met her sooner.

He would not say it now, but he loved Tomoyo.

"I thought I was going to lose you." She whispered. "Please don't die on me. If you do, it will kill me."

He tipped his forehead against hers and pulled her closer to his naked body.

"I'll try, as long as you do the same."

She kissed him softly which quickly turned to passion. He pressed her against the cold wall wanting to taste her more, intensely. It should be wrong for her to be turned on by this now, but she needed a distraction, to get out of her own head, to stop thinking about Layla, about the violence, about Syaoran and Sakura possibly dying.

He supported her as she wrapped her legs around him and their breaths caught when her entered her. She held tight to his wet, muscular back as he rocked into her at a slow, passionate pace. Neither of them caring to give caution to their moans as the shower sprayed over them, washing away the blood, and their sins. Something had changed this time, it was not pure lust and passion, nor was it the secrecy that excited them. It was love, and a mutual acknowledgment of it.

He looked at her when he climaxed for the first time, unashamedly acknowledging he loved her.

She turned the shower off but they remained in it, kissing and teasing until they were dry, and signs of dawn approached.

He dried her and wrapped her in her dressing gown. He would not leave until she was tucked in, and he didn't want to go.

"I love you, Eriol." She whispered. It was the first time she said it.

Eriol hesitated. He parted his lips but she pressed a finger against them. "I'm not expecting you to return your feelings. I know it's difficult for you with…Ruby. But after tonight, I knew I had to tell you. I wanted you to know. And now you do."

Eriol smiled and kissed her hand.

Sleep was beginning to weigh her down. In the tranquil moment she thought maybe things would somehow despite everything, go back to normal, that tonight was just a terrible blip in the radar.

"Goodnight, Eriol." She said softly.

He leaned over and kissed her.

He opened the door to leave, when he turned back her eyes were closed and she was on the brink of sleep.

"Goodnight, Tomoyo." He said and shut the door softly.

Tomoyo felt herself drift off a cliff and into unconsciousness, then a sharp forced pulled her back and snapped her eyes open.

'Goodnight _Tomoyo…._ '

Perhaps she had not gotten away with everything…

X x x

 **Hope you enjoyed :)**

 **Again, always happy to hear feedback! Hopefully the next chapter won't take so long...**

There was a faint beeping near him, he couldn't identify what it was.

His eyes were too heavy to open but by the sterile smells around him, he knew he was in a hospital. No searched his mind to recall the events that led him to this moment, but it was all foggy…scattered.

….Sakura

He bolted upright and was met by pain tearing though his chest. He fell back onto the bed and clutched his chest with a pained look on his face. His lungs struggled to push in an out and he groaned in agony.

He remembered the castle and the fire that surrounded it in his final moments of consciousness. There were guns and screams and chaos, and he was in the middle of it.

He traced a finger around the core of the pain.

He got shot.

He got shot twice.

Looking down he saw under his hospital garments that he was bandaged up tightly, keeping the pain circulating within.

Syaoran was a lucky man.

He brought himself to sit up and recalled the night. Rei…she was dead, as were any of his comrades. And Toya…he was there. His thoughts darted towards Sakura. He got her out, right? She was still OK wasn't she?

Syaoran rubbed his face and groaned into them.

Beside him, he heard a stir. Syaoran slid his hands from his face and looked over at a sight he didn't want to see. He carefully brought his feet to the cold, marble floor and hobbled over to the bed beside him. A curtain separated them. He peeled it back and saw an infuriating sight.

"You survived too, I see." He said through gritted teeth.

Meiling rubbed her sleepy eyes and rolled over to face him. She had a bandage around her head but apart from that, no obvious signs of injury.

She smiled and cocked her head. "Yes, would you rather I didn't?" She asked and raised an eyebrow.

Syaoran's expression was stony and unforgiving, enough to even make Meiling think twice before aggravating him more. Syaoran made the unpredicted move of sitting on the bed and stroked her head, close to her wound.

"Chiharu is dead." He said almost in a trance.

Meiling didn't flinch. She has become more heartless than Syaoran thought imaginable. "Plenty more where she came from."

"The thing is Meiling," He said in a low voice that made the hairs on her arm prickle. His kind hand that stroked her head turned violent. Syaoran suddenly pressed his thumb so deeply into her head would that blood began to kiss its white bandage. Meiling rolled back in agony but it only made Syaoran twist his thumb. The pain shooting through her was so intense she could not even scream.

"I've suddenly had a change of morals. And you are one of many on my list."

Syaoran had not forgotten the promise he had made to himself before he lost consciousness. No more sitting neutral, he had picked a side, and would cut down those in his way.

Meiling looked up at him in wide panicked eyes, terrified at the calm, neutrality of his face. "Watch your step."

Meiling had tears of pain in her eyes and only when Syaoran heard footsteps coming their way, did he release her.

"Mr. Li, you're awake." Said the doctor. "I must say, any longer and you would have been a goner. You should be careful from now on."

Syaoran looked back at Meiling, who was clutching her head, jaws clenched and eyes daggered towards him.

"Yes," Syaoran replied, keeping his eyes on Meiling. "I think we both should be."

X x x


	24. History Lesson I

**Double chapter update! (Because I still haven't mastered the art of writing shorter chapters.)**

 **Enjoy!**

 _Eight years ago_

 _They were close to the edge now._

 _The group of_ seven sprinted _between the trees and avoided latent branches of the dense forest, freedom so close in their grasp. The one lagging behind huffed, unable to keep up with the others. Both fear and exhaustion slowed him down._

 _His mind struggled with the weight of indecision. The sound of military boots behind him sent his heart palpitating. He stopped, he wasn't ready for this. The reasoning behind it all began to crumble and he froze. He looked back and squinted, the moonlight provided poor clarity._

 _He felt a warm hand grasp his wrist with panic. "Come on, Yue, don't turn back yet." His voice was soft despite the circumstance. He interlocked his fingers with Yue's forming a tight bond that flushed Yue with warmth. He had that effect on Yue. Yue would follow him anywhere._

 _He felt his legs thaw and move again._

 _Military voices rang behind them, making Yue's legs move quicker._

 _They stopped, they had reached the edge now. Yue's ears rang with the sound of water cascading from the cliff they were standing on and crashing onto the rocks below. Marble river was unforgiving._

 _The other men began to unpack and move things around, checking the plastic was secure around the stolen weapons. Yue hated how rough and dark their voices were, how they barked like dogs when they spoke of Tomoeda and war. He looked down at the bottom of the waterfall, his stomach dropped, he wouldn't make a jump like that._

 _"_ _Toya…" Yue said in a small, trembling voice and clutched the cuff of Toya's jacket. Back then, his voice was softer, meeker._

 _Toya, caught up with the excitement of it all, broke off his stare to look at Yue, his unexpected love with unfailing loyalty._

 _"_ _Are you sure about this?" Yue asked, ashamed that he could barely manage a whisper. Yue jumped when he heard a shot fired somewhere in the distance._

 _Toya's eyes saddened and he placed his hand on Yue's cheek affectionately. Looking into his pale, grey eyes Toya saw what he chose to ignore for so long. He saw fear._

 _"_ _Yue, if you're not ready-"_

 _"_ _No, I-I am but…isn't there another way?"_

 _Toya looked over at Marble river, at the harsh currents, it's sharp rocky banks and questioned himself if he would survive such a thing. But beyond that, he saw it cascade and flow into the base of the western mountains and he thought, he'd have to make it. There was nothing else for him._

 _"_ _I have to do this Yue, you know I do."_

 _Yue wanted to protest, but indeed he did know, he knew Toya's passion for the cause, the lengths he'd go to achieve it._

 _In his hands, Toya's felt Yue's trembling and his heart sank with the decision he made in that second. The military was closing in. Time was running out._

 _"_ _Yue," He whispered and brushed his fingers through his white hair, the feature that he noticed about him first. Out of everything that has happened in the past few years, falling in love with Yue was indeed the last thing Toya had expected. But he adored him, and that's why he'd have to do this. "You're not ready."_

 _Yue's eyes widened with panic. "No, Toya. We said we'd stay together and-"_

 _"_ _I know," He said placing his hands on his shoulders to calm him. "I know but, it's selfish for me to drag you into this. Stay behind."_

 _"_ _Stay with me then! We'll find another way into the West-"_

 _"_ _No, Yue. I'm sorry. I'll come back for you, I promise. We will be together. Just wait for me."_

 _Yue began to shake his head and felt his chest tighten. Why couldn't he just be strong and fearless like Toya? Why was he such a coward? The thought of being without him, when Toya gave him a reason to live…he couldn't do it._

 _"_ _Toya, please…"_

 _Toya kissed him with a passion that was worrying, like a parting kiss. And before Yue could question it, Toya spoke. "I do love you, Yue. And I will come back for you."_

 _His loving hands rested on Yue's chest for a moment before forcefully pushing him backwards. Yue tumbled down the steep hill behind him. When at the bottom, he looked back to see Toya throw on a rucksack, a pained last longing look in his eyes before mouthing 'I'm sorry'._

 _"_ _Don't!" Yue cried before Toya turned his back and with a mighty leap, followed his brethren into the depths of Marble river._

 _Yue's voice caught in his throat, the tears already brimming in his eyes. Military troops had stormed into the clearing seconds later. Yue concealed himself behind the thick tree and pulled his knees tightly into his chest. He sobbed quietly until the soldiers, convinced the rebels would not survive, left._

 _Yue stayed out long into the night, his mind struggling to muster the bravery to follow Toya. Dawn broke. He had been in the same position for hours. His knees creaked and ached on the long walk back. When he came back to the house, the one he was occupying since his parents died, his cousin Yukito was sitting at the dining table drinking a glass of milk with those stupid matching silk pyjamas._

 _"_ _You're in trouble again." He said with a smirk, hoping to aggravate him._

 _But Yue stayed silent, something in him had changed._

 _He made a promise to himself, he wouldn't fail Toya again. If he survived and did come back, Yue would be stronger. He too would escape the East, he would be with Toya in the end._

 _No matter what the cost._

 _X x x_

Sakura stared into her half-full cup, not knowing what to say, still surprised at Yue's openness to her. She knew there was more to Yue that what he was giving, just didn't know it was this much. After Yukito's attack on her, Yue brought her back to his apartment on the South side. She needed time to calm down before her father seen her.

He had given her one of his shirts to wear, which was comically long enough on her.

Yue's apartment was big, bigger than any other she's ever been to. She figured if you were head of media and communications of the nation, wealth came with it. But his apartment was sparse of furniture. No painting or pictures on the walls, nothing personal. Just sterile, plain furniture, all signs of a man who didn't want to live here.

"So…all of this…everything you do…it's for Toya?" She asked and looked over at him on the balcony smoking his forth cigarette.

Yue's sighed and cast his eyes out at the night sky. The palace seemed so far away now. "Partly." He replied. "But I believed in his cause. So, I did what I could. For him."

Yue's chest tightened when he thought of that night. He thought he had lost Toya then, with every day that passed and no word, he began to give up hope. He never forgave himself for his own cowardice. He became even more silent, broody. It didn't take long for him to be known as 'the strange one' in his part of the East.

When his parents died, Yue was alone with nothing. No ambition, not drive, no hope…then he met Toya, who, with his words and passion, gave Yue a cause to fight for, and a love to die for.

Then, one day almost two years later, Toya came back into his life. But he was changed, different from the man he was. He didn't return to take Yue with him, he needed Yue to stay put, to be his eyes and ears in the East and South. And Yue obeyed, because he just couldn't say no to him. He went into deep cover. He was almost too good at it. And when he abandoned his family for the South he found that Toya's favours stressful to manage. Clearance here, hire an undercover rebel there, sneaking them between the borders.

Yue hid his disappointment well, the thought of a life with Toya was slipping away as each day passed…

"You _believed."_ She repeated. "but now you're not sure."

Yue narrowed his eyes and cursed himself. She was too perceptive, he almost forgot who he was talking to.

"Because you love him." She said.

Yue visibly twitched when she said that. She bit her lip, "Sorry, I just-"

"It's fine," He said and sighed. "You're not wrong."

"You don't believe in his cause anymore?" She asked, testing the waters.

"No," He said almost too quickly. "I do. But….never mind," he said, fearing if he continued it'd be a betrayal to Toya.

Sakura wasn't willing to let it slide that easily though. She placed her cup down and edged towards him.

"Tonight," She began. "I saw something in Toya I've never seen before. It scared me."

Yue said nothing, not liking how she was chipping away at the thoughts he chose to ignore.

"What if Toya's wrong?" She said almost as a whisper. "What if his was is just…is just…"

"Destructive." Yue finished for her.

"Yes." She didn't like thinking of Toya that way either. But it was apparent that Toya's 'cause' wasn't not just anymore. "You'd still follow him?"

Yue stiffened at her accusation. "I have my reasons." He replied.

"Surly after tonight you can see it. Toya is not himself. I'm his sister and I can't ignore it, how can you?"

"The same way you turn a blind eye to your Lieutenant Colonel!" Yue snapped suddenly which made her jump.

Sakura fell silent. The natural urge to deny his words felt pointless with Yue.

"You're not so subtle around him as you think." Yue said, recollecting his cool and stubbed out his cigarette. "The way you threw yourself after him at the ball, it's like you want to get caught."

Sakura was suddenly hit with a tightening of her chest at the mention of Syaoran's name. She looked at her hands. Though she had washed them since, she could still remember the wetness of his blood on her palms as if it were still there. Her heart pierced as she fought back the thoughts that conjured up the worst scenarios. She refused to give into them.

 _He's alive,_ she told herself. _He won't die on me._

"That's different." She said with a meek voice.

"Oh? How is that?" Yue asked and raised an eyebrow, daring her to defend him.

She hesitated and looked away. "He's not like that, not like them…the others. He understands-"

"Do you actually hear yourself?" He scoffed. "You've deluded yourself."

"Not as much as you if you think for a second that Toya cares about any of those people!" She fumed back. "He shot a kid, a _kid_ in the head with _no_ remorse! He is _not_ the person he was, Yue. You know that better than me and you _still_ will stand by him."

Yue clenched his jaw and looked away. She was saying everything he had ignored for so long now. Because she was right. The man he loved…was not the same.

"And I'm not deluded." She said trying to hold onto a strong voice. "Syaoran will help us. He will."

Yue raised an eyebrow. She said his first name, Yue didn't expect she was in this deep with him. In the midst of all of this, Sakura's strength, hopeless sense of justice and bravery, came stupidity and naivety. He had almost missed the fact that she was still a young woman, a young woman capable of falling blindly in love.

Yue sighed and his chest was heavy to remember a time when he was the same. A fool for Toya, able to overlook any of his flaws. Yue hoped she wasn't destined for the same heartbreak and disappointment he suffered throughout the years.

"He won't." He said calmly.

Sakura's head snapped up and she waited for an explanation.

"You're all the same." He said and sighed.

"Who?"

"You. You…children of leaders. No matter how much you fight it, you can't break away. You can't count on him, on Syaoran. Not when he has something to prove. You are the same."

"What does that mean?" She asked and gulped.

"Everything you do," Yue aid directing his words at her. "behind it all you're trying to save your father's name. You think if you accomplish something, your father will be saved. You can deny it, but you know it's true. The Lieutenant Colonel is the same. He can try to _help_ us, help you, but in the end, he is the General's son and his loyalties are with him and the South." Yue's tone ended bitterly. Something told her that Yue's was mis directing his anger at something else, but she didn't know what.

"You're wrong." She said. No, she knew Syaoran wouldn't do that to her.

"Yeah, well," He glanced out at the black night. "It'll be a miracle if he even makes it through tonight. Military were taken off-guard for once-" Yue cut himself off when he saw Sakura's face at that moment dropped in shock. Her eyes widened as she digested his words.

Yue cursed himself for his insensitivity.

"I mean-…he's probably OK…" He said trying to back track but Sakura's lip only wobbled more.

She casted her eyes to the floor and began to shake her head. "No…what if you're right? Oh God!" her voice cracked, a sound that sent Yue's anxiety levels through the roof. He could deal with military, he could handle cover-ups, but not a crying girl, not one as small and vulnerable as Sakura at that moment, especially when it was his fault.

"B-but what if he-he-he's d-de-dea-"

Sakura's panic was interrupted when Yue's hand came down to smack the top of her head.

"Ow!" She shrieked and rubbed the spot he hit. "Why are you hitting me?" She accused through tears.

"I'm trying to comfort you!" He said matching her hysteria. "or at least stop you from crying! I don't know how to deal with that!"

They both glared at each other for a second before succumbing to nervous and much needed laughter, humoured by the fact they were as awkward with each other.

Yue produced a tissue for her and made another attempt to comfort her by patting her lightly this time on the head, as you would do a cat.

"Is that…comforting?" He asked with an awkward smile.

Sakura dabbed her tears and nodded. Considering it was Yue, it was as much comfort as she would have ever hoped for. He placed his hand by his side. "Perhaps you're right about him, about the Lieutenant General. With your brother, I've come to permanently expect the worst. So, if it does happen, I'll be ready."

Sakura frowned and took his hand, a gesture that made him nervous but didn't put her off. "I'm sure he does love you." She whispered. Yue was surprised at how perceptive she was and smiled tightly, a feeling of warmth burning lowly in his chest to be comforted by someone after spending years dealing with it alone. "In his own way. I'm not sure what his end game is though. Because it's certainly not to save my father's name anyway."

Yue grabbed his coat and car keys. "Of course not." Yue said and handed her a clean coat. "It's not your father he's obsessed with, it's obviously your mother he's trying to avenge."

Sakura's feet froze and he knitted her brows together. "What do you mean? My mother died of sudden illness."

Yue froze, his grey eyes looked at her with shock and then pity. A sickly feeling climbed its way up from Sakura's stomach as she felt there was a terrible secret revealing itself.

"Yue, what do you mean? Why would Toya want to 'avenge' my mother?"

Yue's jaw locked. He cursed himself. "I'm sorry, I thought you knew, I thought Toya would have said…"

Sakura narrowed her eyes, her heart beat loudly in her chest as she sternly said; "Tell me."

Yue took a deep breath and uttered the secret Fujitaka tried to hide from her for so many years. "Your mother didn't die from illness. She was murdered, by Lieutenant General Mizuki."

X x x

It was three a.m.

Fujitaka had been staring at the clock for hours now.

His heart beat rapidly and painfully with every minute that went by without a word from her. He peeled back the lace curtains for the hundredth time expecting to see his daughter coming into the safety of their home, but nothing. Only some neighbours gathered outside at this hour waiting to hear news from the palace, or like him, waiting for loved ones to return safely.

There had been no updates on the radio. The reports were too vague to gauge the danger. But for the palace to report anything of a dangerous nature at all was enough to know, it was bad.

He paced back and forth, telling himself not to succumb to tears or jump to the worst conclusions.

But how many times did he have to suffer through this exact scene? Eight years ago, here he was, panicking and waiting for Toya to come home after he had run away. And years before that, he waited for Nadeshiko to come back to him…but each time the only thing that came back was devastating news.

Was the same thing to be repeated with the only thing he had left in his life? His daughter?

X x x

 _17 years ago_

 _Fujitaka glanced out at the thickening crowds marching their way towards city hall. He had a terrible feeling about this. He had never seen Tomoeda thrown into chaos like this before. And they would all think it was because of him…_

 _'_ _Where are they?' He asked himself and looked at the clock. He told Nadeshiko not to go out there, but she wouldn't have it. He should have insisted, but as always, he never wanted to stand in her way. He didn't want to be that type of husband. The one who told his wife what to do. He regretted so much tonight he had backed down._

 _He glanced upstairs to where he prayed the growing riots outside their house had not affected his sleeping infant daughter. And Toya…no. He couldn't let his mind think about his recently 'politically' turned rebellious son right now. Enough arguments had been had in this house. And Fujitaka had sorted out the lock on Toya's window, so there would be no more sneaking off or running away in the middle of the night._

 _The door slammed behind him, making him jump._

 _He almost collapsed in relief when Nadeshiko emerged into the kitchen, her ashen coloured curls bobbed wildly over her shoulders. Her green eyes held alarm._

 _"_ _Where have you been?" Fujitaka asked and held her arms thankful she wasn't injured. She caught her breath and placed her hands on his chest with urgency._

 _"_ _I'm sorry, there was something I had to do-" footsteps came frantically behind them and Fujitaka was immediately filled with anger and frustration at her presence._

 _"_ _What is she doing here?" He asked his wife, trying hard to conceal the frustration in his voice. He felt his temper flare at the women behind Nadeshiko._

 _Nadeshiko looked back at her. "Please, my love, now is not the time for you two to fight."_

 _"_ _I don't want_ her _in our home." He said in a lowered voice._

 _The other woman crossed her arms and glared at him. She had a truly wicked glare. Icy, and one that she never revealed to Nadeshiko. "Oh, come now Fujitaka now is not the time for us to do battle. Can't you see the chaos happening outside!"_

 _"_ _That chaos is a result of_ you _Nathala! YOU brought this here!"_

 _"_ _That's not true," Nadeshiko said and placed a hand on his face to make him look at her. "You know too well, I'm also responsible for this."_

 _Fujitaka bit his tongue and looked at Nathala. That woman has been nothing but trouble ever since she came into their lives. He was stupid to have not seen her true, destructive nature. He turned a blind eye to her radical views on Tomoeda. He stood by while she whispered insane theories into his wife's ear and now, Nadeshiko was caught up in something far beyond her control. But he didn't want to be that sort of husband. The one who told his wife who she could and couldn't speak to._

 _"_ _We can stop these riots from going any further. Just tell the truth!" He pleaded with her._

 _"_ _We can't do that!" Nathala argued and took a stride towards Nadeshiko. She grabbed Nadeshiko by the elbow in a possessive way that infuriated Fujitaka. Ove the years she became obsessive with her friendship with Nadehiko. And Nadeshiko's kindness and naivety to indulge her was driving a wedge in their marriage. "Nadeshiko, if you tell the truth then all of this will be for nothing. Struggle has to happen if anything is to change-"_

 _"_ _Now see here!" Fujitaka fumed and tore Nathala's hand from Nadeshiko. "You've been whispering these deluded ideas into her head for far too long! This must end now! If you don't tell them out there what really happened I will!"_

 _Fujitaka was a very patient and tolerant man, not known to ever raise his voice to anyone. But Nathala pushed all his buttons and he had had enough of her._

 _"_ _Darling," Nadeshiko interjected and touched his shoulders lightly. "It's not Nathala's fault._ I _chose to do it. Please don't be angry at her. We've been too passive for too long! If Tomoeda is to change things ned to get ugly."_

 _"_ _Stop defending her," He replied keeping his voice as level as possible. "Those aren't your words Nadeshiko, it's her," He said stabbing a finger at Nathala. "Can't you see she's been manipulating you this whole time? This isn't you. This isn't what we, what you stand for. You know it's wrong. You're letting those people out there risk their lives for a lie-"_

 _"_ _Men like you are the reason Tomoeda has been like this for so long!" Nathala interrupted and narrowed her eyes at Fujitaka, the distain was mutual. "Nadeshiko made her choice and you just want to stand in her way-"_

 _"_ _Nathala, please," Nadeshiko said in a desperate voice to silence her. It pained Nadeshiko to see her husband so angered. He was such a gentle spirit, but even this, what she did was hurting him. "Just give us a minute."_

 _Nathala crossed her arms and stalked into the living room._

 _Once alone, Nadeshiko cupped Fujitaka's face into her palms. "My love, please don't be mad, what's done is done-"_

 _"_ _But it can be undone. I know we will face some blow-back but we will make it through this. We were doing great work before. What you did, you shouldn't have done it without telling me, Nadeshiko. I know it was Nathala who pushed you into it."_

 _Nadeshiko's eyes saddened. "I know this is right, even if it's a lie. This can only benefit Tomeoda."_

 _"_ _And what about our children? Have you thought of that? What if this doesn't resolve itself and they lose their mother? Or both of us? How are you going to explain that this is good for them?"_

 _"_ _Fujitaka, I don't want Toya or Sakura growing up in that sort of world. The military are trying to divide us, they're trying to oppress us-"_

 _"_ _And what if this gets violent? What if the military decide to use force against us? How can we survive then? You have no idea what you might have brought on us!"_

 _Nadeshiko gulped. Fujitaka's chest tightened to see that his wife was in far, far too deep. Prodded on by Nathala's forked tongue._

 _"_ _If it comes to that, then Clow Reed said he will give us weapons. He supports our cause, he has the means to help us-"_

 _"_ _Don't, Nadeshiko, DON'T mention his name to me. You've been stringing that man along or far too long now!" He fumed._

 _"_ _He's funded us so many times, Fujitaka! Our paper couldn't keep working without his anonymous donations."_

 _"_ _We both know, it' not the cause he's interested in!" he said with balled fists. He felt anger flare up inside him any time Clow Reed's name was mentioned. That man had been too interested in his wife. Always finding ways to reach her, his infatuation with her was so painfully obvious. Not that she would betray him ever, Fujitaka knew that Clow Reed's money had helped them in more ways than one. But as with Nathala, he was regretting not speaking up sterner before._

 _Nadeshiko's hand fluttered to her chest. "Regardless of his reasons, he's willing to arm us."_

 _"_ _Nadeshiko, please," He pleaded with her and took her hands into his. "Please, stop this. Tell them it was a lie. Not for my sake, or for yours, but for our children. Please." He searched her anxious green eyes for an answer. He wanted his wife back, he didn't want this political radical who had become more prominent in the past few months, who, with her words, had inspired hundreds and even their own son to take on radial ideas himself. He knew in there, she wanted a way out of this…_

 _Nadeshiko opened her mouth to reply when a thud from upstairs startled them both._

 _They threw their heads up and then looked at each other in fright. The noise came from Toya's room. They bolted up the stairs and threw open his bedroom door. But there was no Toya._

 _"_ _Damn it!" Fujitaka cursed and ran to the open window and saw the lock had been broken. Toya had run out, again. Into the riots._

 _"_ _Sakura," Nadeshiko ran to Toya's bed, where Sakura stirred out of her sleep. She was clutching a book and blanket but awoke in alarm at her parent's panic._

 _"_ _Mom…" She croaked and widened her green eyes, similar to her mothers._

 _Nadeshiko swooped her into her arms and kissed Sakura's forehead. "Sakura, where did Toya go?" She asked in a calm, but wobbly voice that alarmed their all too perceptive daughter._

 _"_ _Am I in trouble?" She asked, sensing the panic around her._

 _"_ _No, no, darling. We just want to know where your brother went." Nadeshiko cradled her against her chest, the guilt of bringing such chaos to her five-year-old was killing her._

 _Sakura shook her head, she didn't know where Toya went._

 _A young Sakura looked at both her parents and felt a genuine fear for the first time in her life._

 _X x x_

Fujitaka gulped and rubbed his face, he didn't like to think of that night all those years ago. That was the night everything changed. Not just for him, but for all of Tomoeda.

With trembling hands, he grabbed a glass of water. It was almost 3:30am and his daughter had not returned. The sound of the front door closing made him choke and almost drop his glass. He sprinted to the hallway and almost collapsed in relief when Sakura came to view.

"Oh, thank God." He breathed and didn't know whether to combust into tears of joy or laugh as he hugged her tightly and patted her head to make sure it was not a dream. It seems a higher power chose not to make him re-live the same event for a third time. "I thought you wouldn't come back. I thought you were gone." He put her at arm's length to take in her face.

But the expression on her face was not relief, or anything of the sort. Sakura's eyes had dulled and her face was unreadable. Fujitaka suppressed a shudder. Something was terribly wrong. She knew something. It was the same look Nadeshiko had when she returned to the house for the last time.

"What's wrong?" He asked and only then saw the state she was in. She was wearing an oversized shirt. She had showered somewhere and appeared fine apart from the slight limp in her right ankle, but those eyes, dead and sullen made his blood cold. "Sakura, what happened? Who hurt you?"

For the longest time she just stared back, surprised by how much her father had changed in her eyes in the last two hours. Her warm-hearted, simple father held more secrets than she could care to guess at. This whole time she was searching for answers beyond the walls, when they lay in her own home.

"I think we need to talk." She said in a quiet, even voice.

Fujitaka dropped his hands and felt something very uncomfortable rise from his stomach, as if he knew this day would come, but he wished he could have delayed it.

"About what?"

She looked him cold in the eye. No more distractions or excuses, Sakura would find out all he knew.

"You're going to tell me everything." She said with a neutral, distant expression, one she had displayed for many people, but she never thought her father would be on the receiving end.

"Starting with Spinnel 7."

X x x


	25. History Lesson II

Fujitaka blinked and felt himself clam up.

"How did you hear about that?"

"From Clow Reed." She replied and crossed her arms as if to guard herself. Her father was good with avoiding questions and she had to be tough and distant as to not break.

"Clow Reed…" He whispered in shock that the man was not only still alive but reached his daughter. "How did you even meet him-"

"Dad." She said sharply. "That doesn't matter. You need to tell me _everythi_ ng _._ No more lies. Just the truth, it's time."

Fujitaka adjusted his glasses and looked to the floor. "I don't have anything to tell you, Sakura. I don't know what it is you think I know but-"

Before he finished she stormed past him and took the stairs two at a time, disappearing into her room. For a second it was like she was fifteen again. He was thankful that maybe that would be the extent of their conversation but a minute later she was back. She took a sharp right into the kitchen. He followed her, heart racing with the intensity of her moves. Sakura dumped the contents of the bag onto the table.

Fujitaka looked puzzled as his eyes glanced over the worn-down letters and maps but it was the red diary, battered and worn out that caught his attention. Why did he recognize that diary?

"Sakura what-"

"You can't lie to me or hold back the truth anymore dad. I know there is a world outside Tomoeda, I know that the walls have something to do with Spinnel 7, I know that Toya is still alive and you wouldn't let him come back and I KNOW that mom didn't die because she was sick but because she was MURDERED!" Sakura's voice ended in a cracked shout she couldn't control. Her clenched fists were shaking and her heart was racing.

Fujitaka's jaw dropped as his eyes went from her to the table to the diary. He would have asked where on earth she got all of it, but knew better than to ask frivolous questions. Then it clicked.

"That diary…" He breathed.

"It's Nathala B. Omerson's. And I know everything in it. I need you to fill in the gaps." She said.

Fujitaka never thought he'd see that damn diary again. He remembered Nathala with her wild ideas, always scribbling into that damn notebook. He began to unintentionally shake his head. He never wanted his daughter anywhere near that diary. To think all this time Nathala had been in her head. It was a miracle Sakura was still here.

"Dad, either you tell me _everything_ , or I leave." She said with icy even-ness to her voice that grabbed harshly onto Fujitaka's heart.

"What do you mean?"

"You know what I mean, dad. Tell me, or I'll leave. If you don't give me answers, then I'll just go looking for them myself. Things are changing in Tomoeda, give me a reason to stay here."

Fujitaka took off his glasses and with shaky knees he eased himself into the kitchen chair suddenly feeling old with the return of what he thought was long buried. He took a calming breath and Sakura sat across from him, feeling that maybe her threat cracked him.

"It's not so easy to explain. Everything." He said with hunched shoulders.

Sakura realized that his attempts to shield her from the past was a heavy weight on him.

"Try." She said in a softer voice.

Fujitaka sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. "It's hard to explain Spinnel 7 without telling you about," He paused and glanced at the documents littered on the table. He pulled a map close to him. "about how we came to be."

"We?"

"Yes, Tomoeda." He unfolded the map and looked at the small island of Tomoeda, isolated in the middle of the pacific. "We weren't always here. We Easterners pride ourselves for creating the true Tomoeda, but that wasn't us. That was the Westerners, they were the natives here. Of course, at that time they weren't Westerners, there were no walls. Just peace."

"So how did we come to be here?"

Fujitaka sighed, "War."

"War in Tomoeda?"

He shook his head and tapped the map. "No, war out there. World War III happened in 2019, the worst one recorded in history. Millions or deaths worldwide. The world lost control. It was before my time. My grandfather had emigrated to Tomoeda, as did many people from Japan and East Asia. Tomoeda was one of very few places that was neutral."

"Japan...that's…here." Sakura said and pointed to the map.

"Yes," He answered, "It's also your heritage, where you come from."

"Are all Tomoedans from Japan?"

"No, we are in the majority, but people from all over the world came here. It's why we have so many different family names, ethnicities."

Sakura wanted to interject but bit her tongues in fear her father was clam up suddenly.

"The war lasted so many years…I still don't know when it ended, we were never told. By then, Tomoeda was so different. While the rest of the world was suffering and dying, Tomoeda was thriving. We created a peaceful society, but then we became too cocky. There was a culture struggle and an inevitable clash between the natives and us."

"The then South took control?"

Fujitaka sighed and looked at his daughter, envious of her naivety. "Sakura, all Southerners, all Northerners, they all started in the East. Units of the East broke off, declared a monarchy. They got away with it from the support of armed extreme groups."

"And they became the military." She said.

He nodded and Sakura gulped, taking in the information. "Than what happened?"

"Then the war ended. No bombs, no threats, no rival countries. And the world began to heal and open up again…but…"

"But Tomoeda wasn't ready to open up." She finished. She felt animated. Her head was not able to navigate the fact that all of this happened outside Tomoeda. That beyond the walls and oceans, there were other people. She was in awe at her own ignorance, believing that Tomoeda was the height of humanity and society.

"The military cut off contact from the outside. They erased history, burned books and banned anyone from speaking of the outside world."

"But why?" She asked. "Why wouldn't they let the outside in?"

"Tomoeda was founded on the principals of self-sufficiency, self-reliance and survival. And at the General at the time," He sighed with a heavy heart and said, "Syaoran's great grandfather, didn't want to give up power."

"So, we stayed closed off…all these years? And I'm guessing no one could say anything about it."

"Yes. It was actually impressive how the military retained control. Before you knew it, your neighbour was a spy, those who spoke of the outside suddenly disappeared, ever to be heard of again. No one knew who was safe to speak to. There was no such thing as relocation then, no walls. People were free to move where they liked. So they said nothing at all. But it didn't stop people from trying. Like your mother and me."

"What did you do?"

"You're probably too young to remember, Sakura, but your mother and I, along with a few others set up a paper. A popular one, _The Eastern Print._ We ran it here, in our house. Surly you remember Sakura, don't you? How this house use to be constantly full of people? I know you were young but…you remember something of it, don't you?"

Sakura trawled through her mind and thought she remembered vaguely of people milling around her home, always friendly faces. But perhaps she was imagining it. She stayed quiet, unsure of hr own memories.

"I'm sorry…" She said and shook her head.

Fujitaka gave a tight smile and just nodded. It was silly of him to assumed she'd remember something he hoped she'd forgotten. "Anyway, we focused on culture, trying to resurrect forgotten cultures from outside Tomoeda. People wanted to know where they came from. We were careful though, we wrote enough to provoke the military, but not to the point that caused them to act. One of the people who worked here, was Nathala."

"Nathala, worked for you?"

"No, with me. And with your mother…" He trailed off. He didn't want to focus on Nathala too much. That woman incited too many bad memories in him. "Back then…the military was lenient. We had the peoples support and the military didn't want to seem too harsh on us. So instead they spread slander, but not to much avail. And your mother…" Sakura thought she heard his voice crack. He composed himself. Sakura fought the urge to back down. She saw physically how much this was hurting him. But it needed to be done.

"She was the best. She was idolized. People hung onto everything she wrote. And she wrote with such passion just like…" He smiled. "Just like you."

Sakura felt her chest ache. It was the first time she felt a connection with her long-deceased mother.

"Until?" She said, sensing a dark turn in the story.

"Until Nathala…" Sakura saw a flash of anger dart across her father's face. She never saw that expression on his face before. "Nathala…she planted these ideas into your mother's head. I tried to warn her but…Nadeshiko was…hooked by her words. Together they became inseparable. And you mothers articles became…radical."

Fujitaka's felt a familiar weight push down on his chest when he thought of those times. If only he knew how his wife would fall, but he said nothing at the time. He cursed himself every day for letting Nathala come into their lives.

Fujitaka suddenly stood up and briefly disappeared into his office. When he returned, he was holding what looked like a paper. He looked down at it in his hands as if in some sort of trance, unwilling to let it go. He swallowed before handing it over to Sakura, knowing that when it was done, he couldn't take it back.

"What's this?" She asked and took it from his hands. The paper was yellowing after so many years of being concealed.

Fujitaka looked at it with fear and wrestled with himself to swipe it from her hands and burn it, like he should have done years ago. "Spinnel 7…is an article. That article." He said and then casted his eyes away. Sakura thought she saw shame on his face.

She began to read.

 ** _SPINNEL 7: The Military's Response BY KINOMOTO FUJITAKA_**

 _Last night at exactly 8:25p.m, a deadly explosion detonated within Tomoeda's largest coalmine, Spinnel 7. The explosion killed all one hundred and seventy-three western workers, whom a week previous, had demanded better salary and safety standards from the military._

 _This explosion was by no means an accident. This was a deliberate act perpetrated by our General and executed by the military. Those involved were men, women and innocent children. The Military has made its response the free-speech within Tomoeda perfectly clear. Stay silent or die._

 _We cannot sit blind to the censorship and rape of our country. We must band together now and fight this! Tomoeda must respond. Violence of this magnitude can only be met with equal and exact retaliation._

 _The rebellion has started._

The article went on to inform about a specific date and time where the public would meet and riot. When Sakura finished reading, she looked up at her father with shock, not believing that this was the same man who wrote an article that called for violence.

"The explosion at the Spinnel 7 mine enraged people. They saw it as a deliberate act against the public. This article gave them a place to focus that. With dire consequences."

"So, what happened, after you published this?"

Fujitaka's jaw clenched and he looked towards the window, remembering that fateful night. "Riots." He said, "Like I've never seen." When he closed his eyes, he could still picture the screams from outside his house, the bright orange flame of poorly home-made bombs and the smell of smoke and rage that made his stomach turn. "Four hundred and thirty-four people were killed in those riots in the East alone, as a result of that article. And then, in less than a month, the walls came."

Sakura's hand flew to her mouth. "You shouldn't have called for violence but…you were right to report the truth dad."

"That's the thing…" He said and looked at her with the saddest eyes. "It's a lie. All of it."

"What do you mean?"

"There was an explosion yes…but it _was_ an accident. The military were innocent. It wasn't a deliberate attack on us. The military even lost quite a few of their own. But the article…it was a lie. A lie to get people to react. An us versus them mentality."

Sakura felt herself slump back in her chair. She shook her head, hoping she heard wrong. 434 people dead, encouraged to risk their lives, for a lie.

"That…that doesn't sound like you though dad…to write something like that…" She said feeling suddenly like she didn't know her father.

Fujitaka bit his lip and looked to the ground. "That's because…I didn't. That article in your hand was a re-print under my name. The original article was writted y someone else. I took the blame for it later, saying it was actually mine, I wanted to protect the original writer." He said, becoming quiet at the end.

"Who is worth protecting over this, dad? You lost everything in this article."

He took a breath before answering her. "Your mother."

Sakura's mouth opened into a small 'o' but no sound came out.

"I'll never forget that night." He said. "And if I could go back and change it. I wouldn't have let her go out there."

X x x

 _17 Years Ago_

 _Sakura woke with a fright._

 _She threw off her blanket and sat up. With her small fists she rubbed her eyes and checked the time. It was 1:22 a.m. She should have been sleeping, it was still night time. So why was it so bright? There was noise outside that her young mind couldn't recognize. When she peeled the curtains back, she saw that the brightness was the glow of torches. She covered her ears and backed away. Why were people so angry and shouting?_

 _She grabbed her small pink blanket and the book that never was too far away from her and left her bedroom._

 _She crept along the hallway, trying not to trip over her pink pyjamas. When she reached the banister of the stairway, she hears her parent's voices from downstairs._

 _"_ _What is she doing here?" She heard her father say in a strained voice. Sakura frowned. Her parents were always fighting recently. They thought she couldn't hear them but she did._

 _Sakura poked her head around and saw her mother standing between her father and a woman. She's seen that woman before. Sakura didn't like her. Whenever she was around, her mother was distracted, she didn't have time to play with Sakura recently. Her mothers new friend was always here, always pulling her mom away to work._

 _"_ _Please, my love, now is not the time for you two to fight." Her mother said. Sakura didn't like her mother to be upset. Her mother was the prettiest person she knew. She used to always smile. But in the past few months, she seemed anxious all the time._

 _"_ _I don't want_ her _in our home." He said in a lowered voice._

 _The other woman crossed her arms ad glared at him. "Oh, come now Fujitaka now is not the time for us to do battle. Can't you see the chaos happening outside!"_

 _"_ _That chaos is a result of_ you _Nathala! YOU brought this here!"_

 _Sakura jumped to her feet and scampered away. She hated when they yelled. Especially her father. Her father never yells. She fleeted to the end of the hall and reached on her tip-toes to grab the door handle. Toya's room was safe._

 _When she entered, she saw Toya was not sleeping either. Instead, he was halfway out his window with a rucksack on his back. Sakura frowned. Dad hated it when he wore those black clothes. Toya looked back in shock but was relieved when he saw it was just his baby sister._

 _"_ _Sakura, what are you doing?" He hissed in a low voice. "Go back to bed."_

 _Sakura looked at the broken lock on the window. The one her father had spent over an hour hammering on. It was a last resort to keep his thirteen-year-old from escaping. She knew this was bad. Toya and dad were fighting too much._

 _Sakura said nothing and held up her book. Toya looked at it and moaned. "No, Sakura! I'm not reading to you tonight! Go away!"_

 _Toya threw his other leg out the window and Sakura ran over and grabbed his trouser. He glared down at her big green innocent eyes. He fumed and looked from her to the building riots outside. He needed to join them, it was his calling. He had agreed to meet the guys. They made grenades and Toya wanted to prove himself to the cause._

 _Sakura frowned again. She didn't like how mean Toya was lately. He was always angry. Always fighting with dad. Always wearing those dark clothes and spoke in a Mahr Brethain dialect that Sakura didn't like. Sakura didn't like or understand why everything was changing in her family._

 _"_ _Toya. Don't go outside. Everyone is scary out there." She said and tried to tug him back inside. She didn't want her parents to get mad at him again. Toya's always getting into trouble._

 _Toya looked from her to the enormous crowds outside._

 _"_ _Ugh!" He groaned and came back in to Sakura's delight._

 _"_ _Fine, but go to bed after!" He warned. He didn't want to admit that he was close to Sakura. But he knew he was distancing himself from her, from his whole family._

 _Sakura climbed onto his bed and tucked her little feet under her pink blanket. He took the book from her hand, the one she was obsessed with called 'Mikine Tleacht (Miki's House)'. It was a simple story of how a girl named Miki hated her small house with its small rooms and small furniture. She wished hard for her home to grow into a mansion. When it happened, the house grew so big that she couldn't find her family again. Her mother, father and brother were impossible to find. Though Sakura had it read to her so many times, she always panicked that Miki's family would be lost and destroyed forever. But as always, humbled by perspective, Miki wished hard and the house shrunk back to its original size._

 _Sakura was obsessed with the book. She wondered if, like Miki, she wished hard enough, her own family would go back to the way it was. Toya and her parents wouldn't fight, they wouldn't be off somewhere she didn't know._

 _By the time Toya had finished the short book, Sakura was already asleep. At times like this, he questioned his actions. Were his father's words true? Was Toya's rebellious actions tearing apart the family? He shook his head. No. He saw how people idolized his mother. Toya wanted to be like her._

 _He would make her proud._

 _He tucked Sakura under her blanket, and without a further thought, he disappeared through the window, not knowing that the further events of that night would traumatize him until this day._

 _X x x_

 _"_ _Sakura!"_

 _Sakura awoke startled. Her mother swooped her into her arms and tried to keep her voice even as she asked where Toya was._

 _Fujitaka's heart stopped for a second when he realized Toya had gone into the chaos outside._

 _"_ _You see, you see what happened Nadeshiko!" Fujitaka fumed._

 _He was not mad at her, it was pure fear and terror that made him quake now. He bolted downstairs and threw on his coat. Nadeshiko followed after him with Sakura still perched protectively in her arms._

 _"_ _We have to call the police." Fujitaka said and headed towards the phone._

 _"_ _Fat chance that'll do any good." Nathala muttered._

 _"_ _Are you still here!?" He yelled which made Sakura bury her head into Nadeshiko's neck. Her fingers sunk into her curls. Sakura hated this. She wanted everything to be normal. She was so mad at Toya for bringing this on them. Why couldn't he behave?_

 _Nadeshiko kissed the top of her head to comfort her. "Fujitaka, we'll find Toya, he couldn't have gone far. He will come back-"_

 _Nadeshiko cut off when the unmistakable sound of gunfire went off somewhere in the distance. Both parents paled._

 _"_ _My God," Nadeshiko breathed. "They're actually bringing in the military. They're opening fire."_

 _In a second Nadeshiko placed Sakura into Fujitaka's arms. Her motherly senses empowering her to act._

 _"_ _Where are you going?" He said and grabbed her arm to stop her putting on her coat._

 _"_ _I'm going to get Toya back. I can't just stay here Fujitaka!"_

 _"_ _No!" He said firmly. "Nadeshiko you cannot go out there! You heard that gunfire. Who knows what the military have out there-"_

 _"_ _We can't sit by while our son is out there!"_

 _"_ _Well then I will go!" He protested. He was not letting his wife into that madness. Even if she was the one who started it._

 _"_ _No," she said firmly. "If he sees you he'll run from you. You know that. Only I can talk him into coming back. Just stay here."_

 _"_ _Nadeshiko," Nathala said and stepped forward. "I'm afraid for once I'm going to have to agree with Fujitaka. You can't go out there. If the boy knows what's good for him he'll come back."_

 _"_ _I'm getting my son back!" She yelled and Nathala was silent. Nadeshiko turned to Fujitaka. "I will find him. I'll be back. I promise." She said and kissed him quickly. "And I'll make this right, I promise." She whispered._

 _"_ _Nadeshiko," He said and caught her elbow. "I'm begging you…for us…don't go out there."_

 _Nadeshiko was silent. She wouldn't not abandon her son, no matter what the cost._

 _"_ _Then…promise you will come back. That you both will."_

 _X x x_

 _Toya's hands trembles with anticipation and excitant as he tossed another handmade grenade at the street where the tanks were approaching. He ignored the voice inside him telling him it was too dangerous to be here._

 _Across the street, Nadeshiko pushed through, desperately trying to locate her son amongst the maddened crowd. Her heart was pulsating the with growing fear she wouldn't find him. Then she saw him in a small gap in the crowd._

 _She couldn't relax just yet. She tensed as she saw his arms heavy with a weapon he had no idea how to use. She began to run against to crowd to reach him. Toya lifted his arm, ready to throw another when Nadeshiko's hand clamped down on his wrist. He looked back in shock, about to retaliate when Nadeshiko's furious face silenced him._

 _"_ _Toya, we're leaving right now." She said in a low but stern voice. The slight tremble in her voice made Toya aware of how angry he had made her._

 _"_ _But," He began to protest. "This is what you wanted. It's why you wrote that article-"_

 _"_ _Never you mind about that!" Inside her heart ached to know the unintentional extent of her influence over Toya. In that moment she saw how right Fujitaka was. Toya idolized her, as did the crowds around her. She was too concerned with her own influence, she never thought of the disastrous affect it's have on her children. She was going to make this right. She'd take Toya home and admit Spinnel 7 was a lie. She'd face the blow-back. Prison, even. Then she'd cut Nathala off, like she should have done a long time ago._

 _She cursed herself for letting Nathala get inside her head. For pressuring her into writing about Spinnel 7. Nadeshiko knew it was wrong…but got so caught up in the moment, in the glory of inspiring change._

 _"_ _We're going home now." She began to pull him away from the crowd with her heart racing. She kept her head down, knowing she'd be recognized easily._

 _They were being watched the whole time. A young Lieutenant Mizuki stood behind the barricade, eyeing Toya from a distance and almost admiring the animalistic way he fought off oppressing military. But when Nadeshiko showed up, Mizuki put two and to together._

 _"_ _That was Base." Said the soldier beside her. "They said not to go easy on them. The west seem to have calmed down after they brought in the tanks. Rebels were taken out. Casualties are inevitable. You know what that means." He said in an almost sinister way that reflected Mizuki's urge to act. If she did this well, she'd excel towards Lieutenant General in no time._

 _She wasn't going to let the Kinomoto's escape that easily. The General had been out for them for far too long._

 _"_ _Open fire." She said and crossed over the border._

 _Mizuki thundered towards them, ignoring the rebels around her and the gunfire that went off. She stopped in front of Toya and Nadeshiko. Nadeshiko's heart jumped to her throat, it wasn't her first encounter with Lieutenant Mizuki._

 _Mizuki did not care for words. She pulled out her gun. Nadeshiko instinctively tucked Toya behind her. Toya mind raced between his inner rebel wanting to fight, and the intimidation that exhumed from Mizuki. He had never see a soldier so close up before._

 _"_ _Nice article." Mizuki said with no emotion. "I hope it was worth it."_

 _Nadehiko gripped Toya's arm and kept him protect behind her. "Please, don't hurt my son."_

 _Mizuki's eyes floated from her to Toya, and back again. "It wasn't part of my plan, but I should." Mizuki cocked the gun._

 _Toya felt the roars of the riots around him suddenly die out and the only sound left was his thudding heart. It was as if he knew what would happen, but his actions were too late. His frozen limbs couldn't thaw quick enough to act, do anything before Mizuki's bullet fired a devastating blow into Nadeshiko's forehead. Clean shot, maximum damage._

 _Toya couldn't even bring his arms out to catch his mothers limp body as it hit the tarmac. He winced at the small flecks of her blood which dotted his cheek. The crowds around his stopped briefly before retreating from the now onset of gunshots ringing all over Tomoeda._

 _Toya's body began to tremble. He didn't know if he was going to vomit or cry. He looked up and saw Mizuki staring down at them, a look of indifference on her face. She wondered if this would secure her a promotion. She needed to rein in Nathala too. Nadeshiko was the pawn, Nathala had to be the brains._

 _In a sudden burst of rage, Toya ran towards her armed with only his fists. Mizuki stepped back in surprise was quick to react and in a move that would puzzle her, she brought down the butt of her gun to his face. She would always question why she never killed him._

 _Toya almost passed out. Beside him, His mother's body did not stir._

 _'_ _It's my fault.' He thought. 'It's my fault.'_

 _His vision was blurring. He heard Mizuki come closer and almost wished she'd end him too. He knew that any longer and he'd realize the extent of his guilt. Nadeshiko came looking for him, if she didn't, she'd still be alive._

 _"_ _You fight well, child. There would be a place for you in the military." She thought out loud, knowing how much the General would love to have dissident children converted to the South. "But no, I suppose now you're going to be mentally traumatised. Oh well." She knelt down over his face, he was a pretty child. She liked the anger behind his eyes. It would go on to fascinate her for years, knowing the trauma she inflicted on the boy._

 _She leaned in and whispered softly. "I know you'll want revenge for this. You'll probably come looking for me." She smiled and ran her finger along his cheek. "And I hope you do."_

 _The last image Toya had before he blacked out was Mizuki's demonic red hair, and the sinisterism in her eyes._

 _It was the seed that planted his obsession for revenge._

 _X x x_

"So, it's true," Sakura said. "The military…did kill her."

Somewhere inside her she prayed it wasn't true, that Yue had heard wrong. To think she was in the company of her mother's killer tonight made her stomach churn.

"And you kept if from me."

Fujitaka looked over at Nadeshiko's picture, it's been almost seventeen years since those riots, since the day his fellow journalists knocked on his door to deliver the worst news possible. Everything changed that day, he became a widow, but his son survived, physically anyway.

"You were only a child." He said. "I couldn't tell you."

"So, you lied. You said she was sick…you said she died suddenly and I….I _stupidly_ believed you!" Sakura was annoyed at herself and her father. To think she was so naïve. Regardless of her age, how could she have not put two and two together? Her memories of that night were so faded, probably repressed, she could barely remember what happened. She just remembered fear when she thought about it.

"I was going to tell you. When you were older but…but then the years went by. We lost Toya, or so I thought. So much has happened Sakura. You were all I had left. I had to protect you from the past. I didn't see what good it would have done to tell you."

Sakura was standing by the window, arms across her chest as if to keep herself from falling apart.

"When Toya came back…he wasn't the same."

"He blamed himself." She whispered, already feeling sympathy for Toya she didn't think she'd have. They were so different yet she knew he must carry some guilt. Perhaps he turned it into fuel to do what he does now, perhaps he sees it as his redemption. Or perhaps he feels nothing for it at all.

"Please don't blame me for turning him away, Sakura. But if you knew what he became after that night. He was not the same. He went beyond extreme, beyond what your mother ever poke about. He wanted to bring you _into_ that. I couldn't let him take you!"

Sakura swallowed a lump in her throat. She didn't mention that she knew exactly what kind of person Toya had become.

"Why did you do it? Why did you take the blame for something mom did?" She asked.

Fujitaka eyes saddened and he looked down at his hands. "Your mother was idolized. She did so much good for the East. When she was killed…I couldn't let people think that she…that she was to blame for all those pointless deaths for something Nathala bullied her into doing. How could I look them people in the eye and tell them that Nadeshiko had lied to them, that their loved ones deaths were for nothing?"

"So you let people think they died because of _you_?"

"I didn't want her to be remembered for such a heinous and rushed article. I was willing to take the blame. Otherwise, everything your mother did beforehand would have also been tarnished."

"But you lost everything! You lost your career! You let people think this was your fault for so many years." Sakura's voice chocked. She turned away and touched her flustered cheek. To think her father was innocent for all these years, blamed for something he never did, because he loved his wife too much.

"I didn't lose everything. I still had you."

"Why didn't anything happen to you? If you said you wrote the article, why didn't they arrest you? Relocate you?"

In that moment his eyes saddened even further. "They bargained with me."

"To do what?"

"…give up names. The names of the journalists working under 'The Eastern Print'."

Sakura saw in that moment, his real shame.

"You gave up your friend's names? Why? What did they have over you? What could they have threatened you with?" She said with her voice rising at the end. She didn't want to believe her father was the type of man to sell out his own friends to save himself.

He casted his eyes at her with a look of almost pity until it clicked in Sakura's head. She heaved and rubbed her neck, feeling a weight descend fast. "It was me, wasn't it?"

Fujitaka nodded slowly, feeling his chest tighten with the memory of the General coming to his front door all them years ago to bargain.

"After the riots, they were holding Toya in a cell somewhere. They wouldn't let me see him…and when they threatened to take you too," His voice broke and he dropped his hand into his palm. "There was nothing I could do, Sakura. If it meant keeping you and Toya, I'd have done about anything."

"Dad…" She whispered and placed a hand on his shoulder. She sat opposite him and her heart broke to feel him shaking. "What's done is done." She said in a way that said she forgave him somewhat for with-holding the truth. "Dad, is there anything else I need to know?"

Fujitaka lifted his head. He removed his glasses and wiped a tear and took Nadeshiko's picture into his hand. "After tonight, the attack on the castle, things are going to change. I can feel it, just like back then."

Sakura nodded, she felt the same omen.

"And so, you may start to hear things about me…your mother. Don't listen to them."

"Things like what?"

Fujitaka sighed and rubbed his eyes. He was so tired. When he waved her of to the ball earlier, he never imagined the night would turn out like this.

"Those riots, which were a result of your mother's article, the military decided to take action to stop this happening again. About a month later…the walls went up."

Sakura blinked, waiting for him to explain further. Then the penny dropped, and she felt sick. She stood up very slowly and walked in small steps towards the window. She shook her head slowly.

"If what you're saying is true..." She said with a trembling voice. "That means…" Sakura looked out the window, where in the distance, the walls stood unmovable. "Then that means the walls, relocation, the west, the whole takeover…the regime clampdown…" She grated her fingers through her hair not wanting to believe that this was true. "It's all…it's all because of her!" She stabbed a finger at her mother's picture. "It's mom's fault. All of this, everything is because of her!"

Fujitaka bolted up and began to try calm her.

"No!" She retaliated. "No, dad. It's true, isn't it? Because of what she wrote, she made those riots happen, those people died because of her AND she is responsible for the walls! It's her fault Toya's not here! It's her fault Chiharu got shot and that Syao-" She cut herself off, feeling a stabbing pain pierce through her chest.

She didn't dare voice it out loud. _She's the reason Syaoran and I are a secret, the reason he might be dead._

Is she to blame for Tomoeda being as bad as it is?

She felt humiliated. Sakura herself was fighting against the thing her mother started.

In that moment, she just wanted Syaoran. She let herself believe he would understand. He loved her enough not to judge. She wanted to crawl into his lap and wind her arms around his neck and cry until she was too weak to anymore. But she wasn't here, and she couldn't let herself crumble now, not after tonight. She had to act.

"Please, Sakura." Her father begged. "Don't think like that! Don't ever think of your mother like that. We don't know, we have no way of knowing if the military were going to do this anyway. No body would ever know if it was your mother that started it."

Sakura shook her head. She did not share her father's optimism. Her mother was not who she thought she was. Sakura was ashamed of how little she actually knew. She believed her father when he said Nadeshiko was a good person…for most of her life. But the events that followed her last deed…Sakura was unsure how to see it.

Fujitaka said no more. So many years of keeping secrets. He fought so hard to keep her safe. At least that's what he thought he was doing. He saw now that there was an element of selfishness that kept him withholding the truth. Because he could have told her any time. He knew she could handle it. But deep down, he just didn't want to re-live it. He just wanted to keep what little he had left.

And he almost did…until Nathala's diary appeared ad once again, her influence was putting his family in danger.

"Sakura, please-"

"I'll be fine." She replied in a voice that was surprisingly calm. She was looking into the distance at the walls. Fujitaka stood unnerved at the look on her face. He could tell something was brewing in her mind. It made him nervous. It was the same look Nadeshiko had on her last day.

And just like that time, Fujitaka knew he was powerless to stop it.

Sakura thought of what Yue had told her earlier. About children of leaders seeking redemption. Perhaps he was right.

For once, she could completely empathize with Toya's blood lust. She wanted redemption for her mother's murder, but also from her mother's final sin. She wanted her father's name cleared, she wanted..…

…and she wanted the walls to come down.

 _And they will._

X x x

 **So when I began this fanfic, I thought 'it'll be maybe ten chapter long...'. Didn't think I'd be writing to this extent for this long, let alone making up my own very of 'history'. But I am enjoying writing this and I hope you guys will stick with me (and forgive my long af chapters and gaps in between them, I'm working on it!)**

 **I'm sorry there were no SxS moments here...I reeeeeaaallllyyyyy wanted to fit some in but I needed to get these chapters done in regard to the past and filling in history gaps out of the way!**

 **I'll just have to make up for it in the next chapters! ;)**

 **Thanks for sticking with me so far! :D**

 **TheCatsMeow**


	26. Loyalty Lines

**First weekend in a while where I had nothing to do, it was great.**

 **Got a burst of writing energy wohoo!**

 **Here you are, enjoy!**

 **x x x**

"Are you listening?"

Sakura blinked and forced herself out of her daze. "Yes," She lied.

Yue crossed his arms tossed her a worried look, something he's be doing a lot of lately. "I need your focus. We can't go ahead with this unless you're fully in."

"I am focused." She said sterner.

Yue looked at her sceptically for a while. Even in the dark room under the deep red fluorescent lights he could see the distant worry on her face. He knew exactly what was distracting her but didn't bring it up. He focused back onto the pictures laid out in front of him.

They were still deciding which photos would be useful. They had to be sure to get every single thing right. The magnitude of their plan held too many consequences to be executed wrongly.

"The Mirth fields," He murmured. "If we place them parallel to these two," He said pointing to pictures of worker with gaunt faces and children with no shoes. "It'll have more impact."

Sakura nodded and picked up another. "This one too."

Yue shook his head. "It's a waste of column space. We need to show pictures _inside_ the houses, not of the porch-"

"Easterners take pride in presentation. The front door should be the first thing you see. Seeing the shabby work and poor material on Western homes will pull at their emotions more."

Yue didn't argue. Sakura knew Eastern culture better than him, and what they needed was the East to be on their side. In fact, that part was vital. Yue reached for a picture that had just developed. When he turned it upright Sakura's eyes winced and shut briefly.

"Too much?" He asked.

Sakura made herself look at the picture which contained the bloodied corpse of Rei Tachibana. The picture showed her body minutes after Chiharu was forced to shoot her. Half her face was blown off. A murder that seemed so long ago yet that image was so fresh in her mind.

"It is…but it's needed. You need to mention how it happened and about Chiharu's murder-"

"No," He cut her off.

"Yue," She said in annoyance that they were going to disagree over this again. "We can't be biased. We have to tell the truth. All sides of the wall are affected by this. Chiharu was also murdered, as were so many cadets. I know if people read about it they'll empathize more. No one wants to know the government is militarizing kids-"

"Or," he interjected. "You might make all the west look like killers, gaining sympathy for the South thus empowering the military's support which," He looked down at her. "is how we got into this mess."

"I get it, you don't want to print anything that directly affects Toya-"

"Don't." He said and clutched the photo I his hand. "Don't go there."

Sakura didn't push it. There were still so many things they had to do. They didn't have time to fight about this now. The plan was simple, but very time limited. It was a complete expose on everything. All the finding they found, all Sakura's hidden diary entries were going to finally be published. They had the photos and statements but they needed more. They would call for three things.

Demilitarization

Destruction of the walls

Opening up to the rest of the world.

Simple, but even they had doubts to its achievability. Yue was head of media. He would have it printed the night before Utopia day. The East was already rumbled from the deaths at the Palace and the lack of military response. The East and West outnumbered the South, if people were willing to fight, there was a chance they could win. But they needed their eyes opened. Sakura needed to do that.

The backlash would be immediate. The military would scramble to cover it up. But once there was doubt in the people's mind, it would be hard to contain the unrest.

"You need to get back to the West. Take statement, as many as you can. And photos."

"You think they're going to let _me_ back into the West after the attack on the palace?"

"They will under the guise that the _Western Wonders_ is doing a pro-military article."

"Aren't they going to get suspicious?"

"Base is a mess right now. They're scrambling to get order back. You're not their priority."

She nodded. Although she didn't know how much longer she could mentally keep up with pro-military charade.

"There's too many holes in this plan." Yue muttered. "Too many obstacles."

Sakura blew hot air from her cheeks and scratched her head. "Getting Eastern support won't be hard, everyone is already riled up. Small riots have broken out already on our side of the wall." It came as a great surprise to Sakura the fighting spirit that lay dormant in the East. She was sure they had submitted to the regime, she was gladly mistaken.

"I'm more worried about the backlash the West will get. They've nowhere to go if we bring this on them."

Sakura gulped. If only there was a way they could escape when this happened. They were both stumped on this. But one thing was for certain, when it came to violence, Toya was ready. That's what frightened her the most. She'd have to talk to him, get him on her side fighting with her. She dreaded that talk, but it had to happen.

"What of the North? We shouldn't discount them."

"Northerners listen only to their King. They're obsessed with the monarch. The only side of the wall that are under the illusion the military work for them. And it's not like any member of the monarch is going to suddenly be in favour of the breakdown of society as they know it."

Sakura sighed. "Not while the King lives in the pocket of the General."

Sakura had some influence over the Northerners, her column did better there than anywhere else in Tomoeda, but this was out of her league. If only the monarch was on their side or could be convinced.

"There's no going back from this." Yue murmured.

Sakura nodded. She knew it had to be now. They had to take advantage of the happenings of the palace.

Sakura held a small fear that their plan was eerily similar to her mother's all those years ago. Would people die again for the sake of Sakura's words? Was she going to be as guilty as her mother?

Sakura shook her head. No. She was not her mother. She had proof, her mother didn't.

"Yue…" Sakura said in a sudden weak voice that called Yue's attention. "Have you heard anything from…"

She crossed her arms tightly and looked down already regretting bringing it up. But it's been five days. Five days of absolute agony, of waiting to hear something, anything from him. Her mind wouldn't be fully focused unless she knew. But then again…she didn't want to know in case…in case…

"Security is tight at the moment at Base, Sakura…If I called around asking for him…it'd be too suspicious."

Sakura nodded and gulped back a lump forming in her throat.

"Sakura." Yue said and lifted her head with his fingers in a gesture that was comforting. "If the General's son died…we'd know about it by now. Don't assume the worst."

He didn't know why he was comforting her. Since when did he become so empathic? But Sakura was one of only two people he had come to care for.

She smiled weakly. "I thought your motto was to always assume the worst."

"I suppose you've influenced me a little."

She wanted to laugh but she couldn't find the strength. "Then why hasn't he let me know? Why haven't I heard from him?"

"I can't answer that. And you can't let this fog you mind. I need you to focus."

She nodded. Although pushing Syaoran from her thoughts was impossible.

"Go home. You look like you haven't slept in days."

"No, I'll stay."

"It wasn't a request. I can handle everything from here. I need you rested for when you go back into the West."

She decided not to fight him on this. He was right. She couldn't sleep or close her eyes without seeing Syaoran's face or tormenting herself for leaving him like she did.

As she left she looked back at Yue who had already busied himself in other work. She saw through it though. He was too proud to admit that Toya was never far from his mind, and that what they were doing was against everything Toya would approve.

X x x

Mizuki suppressed a groan as she sat back and listened.

"You don't believe me, do you? You think I'm crazy."

Mizuki bit the inside of her cheek to stop herself from agreeing. "Meiling, why are you in uniform? You haven't been discharged from the hospital yet."

"Are you even listening to me?" Meiling said with wide, blood shot eyes. She had stopped pacing back and forth for a second in Mizuki's office. "Don't you hear what I'm saying?"

Mizuki pinched the bridge of her nose. With so much happening at Base since the attack, Meiling's mental breakdown and wild statements were the last thing she needed. Not to even mention the small bouts of violence reported coming from the East, of all places. These small riots seemed harmless, but Mizuki knew all too well not to overlook the rebellious fire of the East.

She forced herself to look at Meiling, a soldier she had so much hope for at the beginning, someone who's potential Mizuki had nurtured for years. Now…he she was babbling about a conspiracy with the huge bandage tightened around her badly bruised head.

"Meiling, you can understand why I'm conflicted. You claim that Syaoran, the Lieutenant Colonel, is conspiring _against_ the military."

"It's true!" She said in a small outburst. "He's plotting something, I just know. You need to discharge me and put me back out there. I'll stop whatever he's planning. We need him interrogated-"

"Lieutenant Li!" Mizuki said in a sharp tone that silenced Meiling. "I'm going to pretend that I didn't hear you throw serious accusation at the General's son. There are serious implications to that."

Meiling clenched her jaw. "And what if I'm right? What if he succeeds, you'll be sorry then."

Mizuki should reprimand her for such ludicrous statements. But Mizuki knew that in her heart, no one cared about Utopia more than Meiling Li. That stupid girl cared for it with every fibre of her being.

Meiling approached her desk slowly. "Just discharge me and let me back to the cadets. We'll oversee the eastern wall and then-"

"As if I'd hand them over to you after that disaster at the Palace. Do you know how many calls I had to make to parents? _Sorry, you kid was shot dead before they even made graduation._ No, Meiling. I'm sorry, but you're not fit to be in charge of them. Not in your current state anyway."

Meiling's chest tightened in anger and a hopeless sense of loss squeezed her. They were _her_ cadets, her pride.

"They wouldn't be as capable as they are now without me." She said in a low, angered voice.

"You're right. But they may also be alive if it weren't for you."

Meiling felt her words burn hard. As Mizuki trusted her more and more over the years Meiling forgot how cold and harsh she could be.

"Meiling, you need rest. You've sustained severe head injuries. We've yet to know if there is any permanent brain damage. If you truly want to be of use to me you'll stay in hospital and recover where you won't be in my way." Mizuki said this in such a light tone that Meiling almost missed the nastiness in it.

"But…my cadets…"

"Have already been handed over to new supervision."

Meiling narrow her eyes. "To who?"

Mizuki actually hesitated and pressed her lips into a hard line. "Well we needed to hand them over quickly. The most suited seemed to be-"

"Syaoran." She finished for her in a flat, depressed tone.

"Well…he did outrank you in combat and strategy back in your training. It seemed like it suited. He's been discharged yesterday."

Meiling's hands began to tremble in fury. She brought them to her head, feeling her bandage where underneath her skull was trying to recover quickly. She wondered if she had lost it. Because what Mizuki was saying was making her sick.

"That's not fair…I give _everything_ to Utopia. I-I've done everything right. I have no marks against me, I've never missed a training, meeting...nothing. And now I'm being punished for it!? Meanwhile _he_ has lived perfectly comfortable behind a desk being a paper pushed for _years_ distancing himself from any conflict and yet _he_ got promoted, _he_ gets whatever he wants because he's the General's fucking son!? Are you fucking kidding me!"

Meiling's hands slammed her palms down on Mizuki's oak desk and the impact rang out. Meiling's heart was thumping in her head and her whole body shook with both fury and fear that she spoke to the Lieutenant General in such a way. The only sound under Mizuki's now raging but silence stare was Meiling's heavy breathing.

"I'll remind you to whom you are speaking too, Lieutenant Li."

Meiling removed her hands and took a step back feeling dizzy as everything she worked for was slipping through her fingers like sand.

"Honestly, Lieutenant. Get your shit together. It's pathetic looking at you. I know in the past the Lieutenant Colonel hasn't been so…forthcoming with being involved with conflict. But he has changed since the events at the palace. He wants to restore order now more than ever. I don't know why you are so angry. Lieutenant Colonel Li tried to save you at the palace."

"He tried to _kill_ me!" She fired back. "If there were bullets in that gun I'd be gone! He didn't try to save _anyone_."

"Now why would he want to kill you, Meiling? Answer me that, please."

Meiling's mouth opened but no words formed. She _knew_ Syaoran had ulterior motives. There was something that did indeed change in him since the palace, but Meiling couldn't see that he was on their side.

"Was he the one that struck you on the head?"

"N-no…"

"So, after he got shot in the back, twice, he decided to randomly attempt to kill you?"

"No that's not what I'm saying-"

"Then please, explain."

"I…I don't know…I just know it in my gut. He's not one of us."

Mizuki sighed and leaned back in her chair. "Go back to the infirmary Meiling. Get your head together and come back when you can provide some use to me." With that Miuki went back to her reports, signalling Meiling to leave.

Meiling hovered a second longer, hoping Mizuki would see she was only looking out for Base, for Tomoeda. But after a second, she knew she was on her own with exposing Syaoran.

She left and restrained herself from slamming the door.

She was about to storm away but when she looked up every nerve inside of her froze. Opposite the doors to Mizuki's office, Syaoran was leaning against the wall, arms crossed with a chilly stare. Meiling couldn't move under the sudden shock. He was wearing his full uniform now, hiding a man who was shot and survived two bullets to the back. She'd seem him in it hundreds of times before but this time, he looked so menacing, intimidating.

Her mind flashed back to when he was over her with a gun. Her memory was so foggy and faded from the night of the palace. But that image of him was a clear as day. He was going to take her with him.

Meiling forced herself to blink. She couldn't show weakness. Despite her trembling knees she spoke, "I know you're up to something. They might not believe me, but you haven't fooled me."

Syaoran's face didn't budge or reveal any hint she unnerved him in the slightest. He uncrossed his arms and walked to her in small, deliberate steps. Meiling was aware that there was no one else in the giant hallway.

She thought he was going to walk past her and say nothing, but he stopped inched from her. She felt trapped under his cold glare. He brought his face suddenly an inch from hers. She flinched away from him, a small cry coming from her throat.

"Good." He said in a dark tone that chilled her bones long after he walked past her and into Mizuki's office.

Meiling's legs wouldn't move and she feared her body would betray her and collapse. But she walked on, using her shaking hand against the wall to guide her.

 _'_ _He's coming for me…"_ She thought. _'But I'll get to him first…'_

X x x

Doubt hovered over the East like a thick fog.

Fujitaka could smell it.

He kept his head low as he passed through the streets, noting the small clumps of people whispering. For once, it was not about him.

He passed a woman and her son. She was raising a sign opposite a local police station holding up a sign that read, _'What happened to my son?'_

Fujitaka gulped. He had been lucky that his daughter had made it back. But a troubling number of Easterners hadn't. The military had not released a statement yet. It worried Fujitaka to see the growing resentment that had been dormant in the East begin to stir and bubble over.

Those who were comfortable to stay on the good side of the South were finally choosing to see through the lies.

"And now they're telling us it was an evacuation drill? Have we become so gullible in their eyes? How have we let ourselves get like this?" Shouted a man standing on a box with a gathering crowd.

Fujitaka heard murmurs and whispers.

 _'_ _My cousin was there, she said military opened fire without even trying to distinguish the enemy from westerners.'_

 _'_ _Westerners were made sit in the back like servants. How is that fair?'_

 _"_ _But my father said the Westerners started it. But why? Why are they so angry?"_

Fujitaka froze. It was all eerily familiar.

He took a moment to gather his breath. It was happening again. It was the same, but it was different. Because Fujitaka knew how these things ended.

"We are owed answers! We are citizens of Tomoeda. They can't hide behind the South walls!" The man's statement got an applause.

As if on cue, soldiers came to break up the crowds. Fujitaka expected the crowds to filter away but was amazed when they stayed put. A can from nowhere was thrown at a soldier and the small crowd turned on them, forcing them to retreat.

He had not seen such an open display of dissidence in years. It shook him.

This is how it starts…Fujitaka knew if it did not get under control, he knew where it would lead. He walked away from the increasingly maddening crowd with his heart thumping.

He knew this would not end well…but rage and sense of injustice in him were suddenly alight, as if he were a young journalist again. It worried him.

But not as much as Sakura did.

X x x

They both stood there, craning their neck up to catch sign of movement.

Nothing.

Tomoyo felt a chill up her spine and looked to Eriol who had a hard expression on his face. Tomoyo looked back up at the South-Western wall and bit the inside of her cheek. It's been days since the attack on the palace. They waited for the retaliation to come. Villagers had already packed their bags and relocated further into the Western mountains to avoid the possible repercussions. But nothing.

"It's s eerie." Tomoyo whispered, afraid to disturb the strange peacefulness. There were no soldiers swarming the area, no tanks, the door were sealed shut with no movement behind them. Almost all soldiers left the West. Nothing had come in or out of the walls. No food, no exports, not even a newspaper to let them know what was happening out there.

And of course, Ruby's medication was running out.

"They're shutting us out." Eriol said. "For now. They know we're short on food. They're trying to starve us."

Tomoyo swallowed. "If they keep this up, it'll work."

"They'll come back, with retaliation. It's only a matter of time."

Tomoyo nodded in agreement. The waiting was agony. Any loud noises put them both on edge. They didn't know if they were even going to wake up the next morning.

"When they come back, they'll go for the main villages. They'll come after me too." He said and took her hand into his. He pulled her into him. She loved the affection, the gentleness, but with every panicked rushed gesture she feared he saw it as their last. "When they do, you can't be here."

Tomoyo's lips parted as she took a step back from him. "What does that mean? I'm not going anywhere."

"You have to retreat of they'll think you were one of the rebels."

"Who cares about that? They're coming for us all anyway regardless."

Eriol touched her cheek and felt torn. He promised himself after the palace attack he'd separate her from his life. But with every attempt to deter her, she won, and he crumbled under the momentous desire to selfishly keep her with him. Because without her…He wasn't sure how much more he could take.

But something as bothering him.

"You say you love me." He said.

"I do." She smiled.

"But you won't tell me about your past. About the real you."

"This is the real me. I didn't even realize it until I came here. Why does this bother you so much?"

He looked away from her briefly which worried her.

"How did you know the Colonel Lieutenant?" He asked, afraid of her response. But it was bothering him. How was she so familiar with such a high-ranking soldier who had the power to destroy their lives if he so chose to.

Tomoyo went very quiet. Her mind racing to pick out a reasonable and believable excuse. It couldn't come up with one. She knew he was tip-toeing around her past. Trying to find out more. But he was never this direct.

"He…we've met briefly. In my past, that's all."

"He called you by your name. Your real name. That's how you let me find out?" He sounded hurt. Almost jealous. He was content for the longest time that her secrets were hers, but now he found himself thinking about it more and more.

"Eriol," She whispered and placed her hands on his chest. She saw in his eyes he was trying to understand her. "It's not important. None of it is. I love you, and I'm not leaving you. Even if you want me to. We both know I don't listen to you anyway."

His mouth twitched and he broke. He kissed her softly and for a long time, memorizing her smell, the taste on her lips…

"The west is my home and I will die for it. For you." She whispered.

He broke from her embrace. A sudden look of anger on his face.

"I don't want you to die for me, I want you to live! Even if it means..." He broke off. She was driving his crazy. This whole situation was. Eriol had never felt such emotions before he met her. He wished he hadn't met her at a time when it felt like Tomoeda was crumbling and the west was demanding so much from him.

Tomoyo balled her fists to keep from crying. "Even if it means never seeing me again?"

"Yes!" He replied. "Because it will mean you'll live."

"And what about you? Do you think I'm so selfish that I care about my own life more than yours? You keep saying you have this _duty_ to these people when I think you _want_ to die here. Why can't you care about yourself enough to survive?"

"Unlike you, I'm not going to run away from _my_ home!" He shouted at her. "If I die, it'll be where I belong!"

Tomoyo's chest tightened. "Fuck you, Eriol." She refused to cry in front of him, even though his words hurt so much.

"Wait," He said and grabbed her wrist. She shot him a cold look. "I didn't mean that. Whatever your reason was I…I'm sorry. You know I'm glad you came here, glad you stayed. But now," He ran his hand through her rain and stroked her cheek with his thumb. "It's too dangerous here."

"I'm staying." She said sternly. She wanted to storm off in anger like she had done in their past fights. Where he would catch up to her and tell her she was being ridiculous. Then he'd say something to place distance between them yet not let her go until they were ok again. Then passion and love would take over and the argument forgotten only for circumstances to haunt them all too quickly. It was a savage circle.

"Tomoyo-"

"I told you to stop calling me that!" She said annoyed and broke from him.

"Wait." He said and caught her by the arm. She tried to resist but he clamped her arms to her side and forced her to look at him. "My point is, you're not Madison. And for some reason you don't want to tell me about your past."

"It's not important, Eriol. Why can't you just drop it?"

"Because you have a way out. Don't you understand you're not from here? If it guarantees you safety you need to go back to where you belong." Eriol tried to keep his voice level, but his words contradicted his feelings. He didn't want her to leave. With everything happening, he _needed_ her. He loved her. But he had to protect her.

"Stop it!" She yelled, frustrated that they always went back to this argument. "Stop trying to push me away, Eriol. This is my home now." Her voice cracked which made Eriol silent. From the spoilt, manipulative girl who arrived here months ago, Eriol never thought she'd become so immersed into Western life, and into his. But he didn't want her to die for it.

"There is nowhere else I can be." She said and looked down. "I love this side of the wall, I love you…and Ruby and to a weird extent, your mother. And I love the fucked up little life we all have…had."

He ran his hands through his hair and moaned. "It was always going to come to an end. Why can't you just do this one thing for me? Why can't you just go back to where you came from!? Why can't you LIVE?" He shouted at her which flared her anger.

"Why can't you just admit you don't really want me to go? That your forcing yourself to say these things? Why can't you just admit you love me instead of trying being an emotionless asshole and pushing me away!?"

Eriol was about to yell back but her words caught him. Tomoyo's echo rang out. She waited for him to respond, her heart was thumping. This was the first time she demanded a response from him.

She broke the silence first. "You do love me…don't you?" She asked sceptically.

Eriol opened his mouth to speak but had trouble finding the right words. Of course, he loved her. But he had never told her. Because with the West gradually falling into despair, was it really a good time to let emotions get the better of him, when he could lose her any day now?

"You know…" He began. "With Ruby-"

"No!" She barked. "No, Eriol you do not get to use Ruby as excuse anymore. I never once asked you to leave her and I never, _ever_ will. I don't want to hurt her either. It's not about her, it's about us. I'm asking if you love me. If I mean anything to you."

She just wanted a yes. Nothing more. Just a conformation that their love was mutual.

Eriol gulped and fought the urge to throw himself at her. To kiss her everywhere and tell her she as the only thing keeping them sane. That wherever she came from, he wished it was before he met Ruby, because he knew without a doubt he'd have loved her then too.

But perhaps this way was better. If she believed he didn't want her. Maybe she'd leave, maybe she'd return to that life and live.

"Why can't you just say it?" She said with a tear in her eye.

Eriol clenched his jaw from admitting the truth. He crossed his arms and hardened his face. Tomoyo knew that stance. It was his way of shutting off, of putting that cold distance from himself. He did it to so many people, but she never thought he'd do it to her.

"There's a cart that goes to the Eastern wall ever Friday. There's a soldier or two still on duty there. If you tell them you're from the East they'll relocate you back to your family."

Tomoyo stood there stunned. She was numbed at the detached tone in his voice. For a moment it was like one of their first meetings, when he told her to leave. She knew it was a front, it just had to be.

Tomoyo turned to leave. She was too upset to face him.

"If I am ever gone from your life, it won't be because of the walls, of the soldiers or Ruby or anything else." She looked him dead in the eye with her icy blue eyes, "It'll be your fault."

With that she walked away from him. With every step she took she prayed to hear the sound of him catching up to her, to apologize, to argue more with her, _anything_ but the painful distance he'd just placed on her. But he didn't follow her.

Eriol swallowed a lump down his throat as her silhouette disappeared.

"Harsh." He heard a voice from behind him. He groaned inwardly. She was the last thing he needed.

Mrs Hiirigazawa appeared onto the path. She had an eyebrow raised at him with her arms crossed, mimicking her sons posture.

"If you're going to lecture me on infidelity mother. Now's not the time."

"Oh, my son." She said and sighed. She looked up at the wall in awe of its silence. "Your private life is not of much concern to me. We've bigger things to worry about."

"You…you know about Madison and I?" He tried to hide his shock.

"I was thinking you were _too_ happy prior to the palace attack. The way you are around her…I thought I taught you to hide your emotions better." She scoffed, never taking her eyes off the wall. "Anyway, it's for the best you distance yourself from her. You don't need any distractions right now."

"You should take to the mountains, mother."

"As if anywhere in the West will be safe with the military coming. Those who flee are just deluding themselves."

"Maybe the military would show mercy if they had Toya."

A dark look descended over her face. She narrowed her eyes. "You don't know that."

Eriol clenched his fists and turned to leave. He looked down at his mother, whose motives and mindset had always been an enigma to him. He could just never do right in her eyes, not completely. He always seemed to be lacking slightly in her eyes. It was only when Toya came here, with his brazen attitude and thirst for violence did he realize that his mother was not entirely who he thought she was.

She would never admit it, but she admired Toya.

It pained Eriol to know, she wished that he was more like Toya.

"Maybe if you stopped hiding him, we'd find out." He said bitterly and walked away.

Behind him, the wall stayed silent, watching over West Tomoeda, revealing nothing of the brooding battle beginning behind it.

X x x

X x x

Sakura glanced through the kitchen curtains.

The sun was going down, yet it had not deterred people to go into their homes. She saw other people through the windows of their own homes waiting anxiously and hopelessly for loved ones who still had not returned from the West.

She retreated back and looked at her notebook which lay on the table full of scribbles and drafts that had not satisfied her.

 _Get yourself together._ She told herself. Every minute was precious. She had to make moves on this paper. That one that would expose everything she knew. But her brain could not sync with her heart, which was torn.

Her eyes floated to her mother's picture. Nadeshiko was smiling with an innocence that Sakura doubted as each day passes. No matter what her father said, Sakura couldn't see past her motive. A sudden anger stirred in her and she picked up Nadeshiko's photo with a shaking hand.

"Why did you do this?" She whispered bitterly and wanted to slam it face down onto the table.

But no. Because in her mind, Sakura wondered if she were any different. Wasn't what she was planning going to cost lives? Was she any better than her mother? Were their motived not the same? Both of them driven to desperation to take action at the cost of how many lives? She placed Nadeshiko's picture down. In her other hand she held Nathala's diary.

Sakura felt a sickly pain in her stomach. Was she so naïve to follow Nathala's words and not question them? Sakura felt she had been misled, or was she? Was Nathala lying? Or was her father biased by hate for her? She didn't know anymore.

She heard her father come down the stairs and she put her notebook and Nathala's diary into the drawer. Although her father knew so much now, she decided to be discreet for his benefit.

"I've to step out for a few hours." He said. "Do you need anything?"

She shook her head and attempted a smile that failed. Fujitaka wished he had the words to comfort her. Dissidence, riots and past revelation he could probably deal with. But a broken heart was difficult for him to comfort.

"Sakura," He said and placed a hand lightly on her shoulder. "He's strong. He will survive."

Sakura felt a lump in her throat, surprised at her father's acknowledgment of the situation troubling her. She just nodded, afraid if she said anything she break down again. And she wasn't sure if she had the energy to.

When he left she returned to her notes? She needed to separate Syaoran from her thoughts, from her task. Something that seemed impossible.

The doorbell rang and Sakura groaned and threw her hands into her head. For the past few days neighbours and Easterners from afar have been coming to the house, asking what she's seen or heard. Did she see someone child there? Did she know who survived, was she going to write about it?

It was mentally draining.

She was angry now as she stormed towards the door with balled fists ready to request to be left alone. She ripped the door open, mouth ready to bark when she froze.

She blinked twice, not allowing herself to breath in case it was a hallucination.

He felt the same as he looked down at her trying not to collapse in relief.

She made three attempts to say something before words finally came out.

"Syaoran…"

X x x

He came inside and let the door close softly behind them.

Sakura finally breathed and with shaky knees closed the gap between them and threw her arm around his neck. The impact caused small ripples of pain through his chest but it was nothing compared to holding her again. His arms circled around his waist and lifted her easily.

They stayed liked that in the quiet moment for relief. Neither one wanting to let go.

"I thought you…Syaoran I thought…" She was dizzy as she took in his scent, his touch, everything she never thought she'd have again.

She loosened her grip and placed her hands on his cheeks. It was him, he survived. She felt ashamed for ever doubting her would. He pushed her fringe back from her face and thanked every force imaginable that he could see those green eyes again.

"I'm sorry… I'm so sorry." He said and finally kissed her passionately.

Tears ran down her face as she pressed her body firmly against his. Her knees gave way as the stress finally melted from her. Nothing else mattered. He was safe.

"Why didn't you come sooner? Why didn't you let me know? I've been going crazy." She whispered.

"I tried. But they wouldn't release me from the hospital until today." He stroked her cheek. "I'm so glad you're safe."

She bit her lip and felt drained as she pressed her forehead against his chest, perfectly content with staying there.

His hand rested on her head protectively. He remembered the promise he made to himself to protect her and do right by her. As much as he wanted to stay in this moment. Time was precious.

"Sakura, I think there's things we need to discuss."

She didn't move for a while before her felt her nod into his chest.

"You're right. But first I need to show you something."

X x x

Syaoran closed Nathala's diary. But he wasn't surprised. Nothing surprised him anymore. He was ashamed to even admit that to some extent, he knew of the outside world.

"Do you think your plan will work?" He asked and turned to her.

She was sitting on her bed. Gauging his reaction.

Sakura sighed. She had asked herself that question over and over again. _Will it work_?

"It has to. Either way, it needs to go ahead." She said.

Syaoran nodded and glanced out her window. He knew she wouldn't have let the palace events deter her. He had braced himself for her response.

"What do you need?" He said.

Sakura looked at him with confusion. Since he came back, there was something different in his eyes. Something meaner, more determined than before.

"Syaoran…you don't have to…"

"No," He said and looked away. An image of Chiharu flashed across his mind. "I do. This whole being passive thing doesn't seem to be working for me. So, whatever you need. Just tell me."

She nodded bit her lip, feeling such reassurance from knowing he was on her side.

"Well…do you know what the military is planning next? They haven't made any response yet."

"No. Base is a mess at the moment. They're scrambling to get things back in order. But that doesn't mean Mizuki doesn't have a plan. There's something she hasn't told me yet. But I'll get to it."

"How?"

"They think I'm one of them. She's trusting me more. And I've pushed Meiling out to some extent and gained control over the cadets. If you give me some time, I can find out what's going on."

Sakura nodded, overwhelmed that he was rigidly by her side now. No secrets. "Well, we need to protect the Westerners. They'll face the brunt of this no matter what. If there was a way to get them out of there…"

"The walls." He said to himself.

"What?

"For cases of emergency evacuations, the walls are opened for a certain amount of time. If all of them were opened at the same time…" He trailed off, his mind going through all the possible scenarios.

"It'd cost chaos and buy time. And allow westerners to escape. But, can you really do that?"

Syaoran thought to himself. He remembered briefly through his training that this was an option. But the code lay with one person only. The General himself. If anyone could get it, it was Syaoran.

"I'll just have to."

Sakura smiled with elated optimism but it was short lived. "What's wrong?" When he noticed her suddenly deflate.

"Do you think…do you think this is crazy? What we're trying to do?"

He swallowed and took her hand into his. She stood up and thought about how this would affect them, affect everyone and everything. If she thought she lost him after what happened at the palace…this was suicide.

"Absolutely."

"Then we'll aim for Utopia day."

"Sakura," He said suddenly in a serious tone. "Will you be safe until then?"

"Of course. What do you mean?"

He looked at her hard. "I mean Toya. I haven't forgotten, what he almost did to you-"

"I'll take care of Toya." She said defensively. She couldn't understand why even when it was obvious Toya had other intentions, she was the first to criticize, and the first to defend her brother.

"I know he's your brother but-"

"I said, I'll take care of it. He won't hurt me. Trust me." She said firmly.

Despite coming to a consensus on almost everything, Toya would be a wedge that Sakura would not remove, despite her own doubts. Her chilly stare warmed and her body relaxed.

"Let's not talk about it anymore." Her hands placed themselves on his chest. "H-how did you survive? There was so much blood-" Her voice cracked, unable to stand the memories of almost losing him. "You shouldn't have pushed me away…." Even now she couldn't believe he was here with her. "You're…and idiot." She said through a broken smile. "Don't you know by now to listen to me?"

He took a hand and kissed it softly. "I am an idiot. I'll not make that mistake again. Ever."

"And you dumped me…again." She said with a smile. "That's twice now."

He brought her hand to his lips and kissed her knuckled. "I'm a stupid, foolish idiot. But I'm yours."

They were both silent as they look at each other taking in the details of each other's faces. Her hands, which were feeling through the soft hairs on the nape of his neck descended to carefully unbutton his jacket.

Something fell from his pocket.

She bent down to pick it up. "Is this…?"

He nodded. "They extracted it from my lung. I don't know why I kept it. I should have thrown it out."

Sakura looked at the bullet. The silver winked at her. "I'll keep it." She whispered. She wanted it as a reminder. A reminder he survived.

He watched her fingers delicately undo each one then peel his jacket back in small deliberate movements. Layer by layer she removed his shirt and vest. She took a small breath to steady herself, unsure of what she'd see. The last time her hands were pressed against him, she was covering his bloody wounds. She remembered it's hot, wet texture and thought no man could survive that. Yet here he was.

Her eyes fell to his bare chest. She gasped as her chest tightened at the deep purple and sickly yellow bruises spread out like some modern painting. Her shaking hand hovered over the epicentre of the marks and she bit her lip from crying.

"Syaoran…how are you standing?"

He caught her hand. "The pain is getting less and less and the days pass. Don't' worry about me."

She shook her head, refusing to believe he hadn't been in pain this whole time.

"You should still be in hospital."

"It's better for me to be here." He whispered. "With you."

She brought herself to walk around him to examine his back. To her horror, it was much worse. Tears rolled down her cheek and she was glad he couldn't see her. She saw the thick marks of where the two bullets pierced. Her shoulders trembled and she ever so softly pressed her forehead between his shoulder blades and circled her arms around him. Her palms covered the exit wounds of his chest.

 _He's safe...he's safe…_ She thought.

He turned to face her and cupped her face. "Why are you crying?" He whispered. "I'm safe. _You_ saved me. Like you always do."

She smiled but it didn't stop her tears.

He kissed her. Softly at first, but quickly, rougher, more passionate. He took steps forward, towards the bed. He wanted to forget about what happened. Just for now. Syaoran wanted her clothes off, her skin on his and for them both to escape into their own world they almost lost.

"Syaoran," She said breathless as he began to tug her belt open. "Wait, you're in pain. Are you sure-"

"All I need is you, now." He said roughly and threw her shirt over her head. An animalistic urge was re-wakened in him and his hands ran passionately over her naked skin to which she responded to instantly. She melted in his arms and willingly fell onto the bed. When he was over her she felt a wild jolt between her legs wanting him to take her.

The mood had changed so quickly. She wanted to feel every part of him, to have that physical confirmation he had not left her.

His mouth crushed hers and she moaned when she felt him harden between her. His finger hooked around her trouser waistline and pulled them down. His lips moved to kiss her neck and breasts as he brought pants down. His hot breath moving down to her belly made her tremble with excitement. She was so prepared for him.

Then it stopped.

She looked down, breathing heavy. Syaoran had sat up, a look of pain on his face as his hand clutched his chest.

"Syaoran?" She said and sat up in panic.

"It's fine." He said but his breathing was strained with the fiery pain across his chest. "It happens sometimes." He said and breathed shallow breaths to get through it. "It'll pass."

Sakura sat there helpless. The pain passed but movement was difficult for him. Sakura calmly pressed her fingers against his shoulder and pushed him back so he was now lying on the bed.

"Relax," She whispered. "Let me take care of you."

"But-"

"What did I tell you about listening to me?" She breathed and he was silenced.

She kissed him lightly and fluttered kisses to the purple raw bruises on his chest. Each kiss acting as a drop of medicine and Syaoran felt the pain reside with each one. His hand stroked the back of her head as it dropped lower and lower to take him into her mouth.

Syaoran breathed in sharply at the warm feeling taking him now, muting the pain of everything else.

"Sakura..." He said between his moans.

She said up and straddled him, taking care not to hurt him. "I love you." He said breathlessly before he was inside her. She began to rock back on forth slowly while watching his reaction for any signs of pain but found only a complete surrender of his love. His hands gripped her roughly by the hips and rocked his own into her faster and harder.

The sensation overtook the pain and they both groaned. She gripped the shelf above her to steady herself as she was coming. Syaoran tossed his head back into her pillow as he climaxed, followed silently later by Sakura.

Her whole body, now sensitive, flopped to his side. Her limbs wrapped around him and she kissed him softly. "If you ever die on me, I'll kill you."

X x x

Syaoran didn't mean to fall asleep.

He must have drifted off at some point. Sakura was asleep silently beside him. He needed to get back to Base before questions were raised. But he took a moment to watch her sleep. He stroked her hair, thankful the second bullet didn't kill him.

He was so tired…drifting to sleep.

Suddenly a flashback jolted him from his tranquil state. For a second, he saw Chiharu in his mind. He shook his head. Why was he remembering that now?

 _Ignore it._ He told himself. But it came back. Chiharu's head in his arms. Her light, weightless body, responding to nothing, Toya, the gun, the clean shot, all the red.

"Uh..." Syaoran jumped at the sudden vivid and violent images assaulting his mind.

Sakura didn't stir. He swallowed, trying to get a hold of himself. He broke into a cold sweat. He stroked her hair again, it was soothing him.

 _Stop thinking about that night. You're here now. You're with her, and she's safe. You got her out. She's safe…_

He felt something strange on his fingers. He frowned. When he pulled them from her, he said blood. Syaoran blinked and his hand began to tremble. He looked at Sakura, searching her scalp for an injury. She was not bleeding. He shook his head and the blood was not on his fingers anymore.

 _Am I imagining things…?_

He told himself to relax and lay back. Chiharu's face flashed in front of his eyes again. He remembered the texture of her blood as it seeped through the bullet wound on in her head.

He checked Sakura again. No, she's safe…she's safe…

The images returned. Not just her, but the other cadets, and the Westeners…blood. So much blood. Syaoran's heart thumped. He placed a hand over his chest. He felt something wet. He pulled back the blanket and his face turned white. He bolted to his feet and into her bathroom. His hands gripped the sides of the sink.

 _No, no, no_ he thought as blood pumped out from his chest wounds. His breathing shallowed as his hands desperately tried to plug the wounds but the blood kept spilling out. He was panicking, he couldn't stop it.

"Syaoran-"

Syaoran jumped as his arm swung back and knocked Sakura against the bathroom wall and onto the floor.

"Sakura…" He said and pushed himself back, not believing he just hurt her. "I'm sorry…I'm sorry…the bleeding…It won't stop."

"Syaoran." She said stumbling to her feet and over to him with wide panicked eyes. "Syaoran, look at me." She said and grabbed his face in her hands. His amber eyes looked at her but his mind was somewhere else she couldn't reach. "Syaoran listen to me. You're not bleeding. You're fine…you're fine…" She soothed.

He looked at her eyes, finding comfort and calmness in them. He brought himself to look down and saw she was right. There was no blood. But…but he was sure there was.

"I…I…" He couldn't form words. He slid down the bathroom wall, suddenly feeling weak. He was sweating, breathing heavy.

Sakura's chest swelled as she realized that Syaoran had witnessed a lot more than she had that night. Perhaps he wasn't not ready for this…

Syaoran looked at her with a broken expression. "Sakura…I let her down. Chiharu…all those kids…"

"It's not your fault Syaoran." She said softly and stroked his face.

"No, it is. If I had done something, stopped Meiling. Chiharu, and the rest…"

"You don't know that." She said and took his hands into hers. "We don't know what could have happened. All we can do is stop it from happening again."

Syaoran hung his head low, he couldn't accept he had no blame in this. If he had acted sooner, if he were not such a coward to stand up to Meiling, to Mizuki, his father…

Sakura wrapped her arms around him and kissed his cheek.

"They won't have died in vain. We'll make sure of that." She whispered.

X x x

Sakura buttoned up his jacket with a worried look on her face.

"I told you." Syaoran said. "I'll be fine."

"I know you will be. Do you have to go back now?" She asked.

He nodded. "I'm afraid so. But I'll come back as soon as I can."

He took his cap the kitchen table and placed it on his head. He needed this night with her. Another day and he would have gone crazy. He took her hand and pulled to towards her. "Don't do anything rash without telling me." He said and brushed her hair from her eyes. "We're in this together now."

"I'll do my best. Though I don't have a great track record."

He kissed her again, lingering a moment longer than he needed to before turning to leave.

"Syaoran," She said and pinched the cuff of his sleeve. He halted and looked back at her. She swallowed and parted her lips wit hesitance but she had to say it. "You know…I love you…don't you?" She said suddenly nervous.

Syaoran smirked with a warm feeling in his chest. Of course, he knew, but never heard her say it.

"In the moment when I thought that you…that you wouldn't make it. My only regret was never saying it to you before.

Sakura had spent so much of the time after the palace attack agonizing over that. If he had died…and she never told him…It would have haunted her for life.

"So, this is me telling you now, so there's no doubt. I love you." She felt her cheeks flush a soft pink.

He grazed her cheek with the back of his fingers. "I know you do. There was never any doubt."

She kissed him lightly and he left. She stood in her kitchen doorframe in a slight trance. An overwhelming feeling of happiness and fire coursing through her veins. She knew her mind was set now. She was ready to take on anything. It was all possible now.

A slight creak snapped her out of her daydream.

She furrowed her brow and craned her neck around and listened.

"Dad?" She called out. She never heard him return. But the noise came from the back door. She would have ignored it, but she had a sense someone was there. She crept around the kitchen island. Her bare feet suddenly sensitive to the cold. The kitchen window veil fluttered above a light breeze coming from the back.

Th door was open.

"Dad, are you back?" She called out again with a chill going up her spine. She told herself not to be so paranoid. Perhaps Syaoran had opened it at some point. Maybe even she did without realizing it. The whole night had been a whirlwind of emotions. She needed rest.

She walked over in three strides and closed the door, shaking her had at her own silly imaginings.

When she turned around she halted at the unmistakable silhouette that emerged from the corner of the living room. She jumped back, heart racing. A hand fluttered to her chest.

Did Syaoran come back? Her dad…?

"Dad." She breathed recognizing the same height and build as her father. She walked towards him "Why are hiding there in the shadows-"

He feet froze mid-step. It was not Fujitaka. She knew that ominous presence before it even stepped out of the darkness.

"T-Toya…" She said with a meek voice.

Toya emerged very slowly with a chillingly blank expression on his face. His eyes bore into hers. He held that intimidating presence that shook her to the core in a way only he could do.

Sakura swallowed and forced herself to take another few steps towards him. "Toya, what are you doing here? H-how did you get across the wall again? I haven't seen you since the palace…" Sakura trailed off when a numbing thought crossed her mind.

How long had Toya been standing there…waiting…listening to her and Syaoran…?

Her fell turned white. Her palms began to sweat and a sickening feeling began to swirl in the pit of her stomach. She could tell in this silence and the cold expression in his eyes, he had heard enough. Sakura subtly retreated a step. Her eyes fell to the front door in panic, wondering if Syaoran would come back for something. But no, she was on her own with Toya.

She was suddenly aware she was in her pyjamas, hair tossed from rolling around with her controversial lover not so long ago. This was bad. This was very bad.

Toya took a small step forward. His eyes rooting her to her place. "Yue called me." He said in a quiet voice. He was restraining the trembling anger she sensed building up in him. "He said you found out about what really happened to mom."

Sakura swallowed as he was closing the gap between them.

"I wanted to see you. To see if you were ok…I was worried about you. So, I risked being caught, everything, to come see you tonight." He stopped inches from her. His voice was so soft, quiet…mistaken for brotherly even. But it unnerved her.

Sakura was trembling under his stare. He couldn't bare to look at him. A voice in her head told her to stand up to him. She was doing nothing wrong. But that voice was drowned out, muted by Toya's presence. Only he unnerved her so.

He brought his face down close to her. She turned her head in sudden shame and fear and closed her eyes. His lips came to her ear. "But it seems…you're dealing with it…just fine."

She bit her lip, her heart thumped against her ribcage. "And there I was thinking that maybe I was too harsh on you last time…doubting myself for questioning your loyalty. But now I see…now it's clear…you have no loyalty."

Sakura began to shake her head. Fear was shunning her voice. He stood over her with his quiet but intense eyes full of accusation.

"It's not what you think…" She answered in a weak voice. "It's not…it's…"

"Oh?" He said and smirked sinisterly that made the hair on her neck stand. " _I love you'_ were your words, right? You said them twice if I recall."

"Toya…please…"

" _'_ _My only regret was never saying it to you before.'_ Seems to me dear sister, it's exactly what I think. _'We're in this together.'_ "

Sakura felt the panic rise inside of her. He had heard everything. She couldn't backtrack. He knew…

She finally brought herself to look at him. His face was beginning a slow descent into violent rage. She knew that look. It was the same one he gave her at the palace before he was about to strike her.

"Syaoran-"

"Oh, _Syaoran_ , is it? I see. Well I should congratulate you. I'm so happy you haven't let the circumstances of our mother's death prevent you from spreading your legs to the General's son." He His growled with a rising tone that made a small cry escape from Sakura's throat.

"I thought it was funny…back at the palace…My memory is still foggy but you cleared it up now." He smirked and brought his finger to her cheek. She shuddered under the slight touch. "You tried to stop me, didn't you? Didn't want me to hurt your precious _Syaoran._ You chose your side…him over you own brother. Your family."

"Toya it's not like!" She said finally finding her voice. "Syaoran isn't like them! He wants to help us! And if you would listen to me, to him I-"

Sakura didn't finish her sentence. She didn't register Toya's hand swipe furiously across her face until she was already on the ground.

"Listen to _him!?"_ He roared and punched a hole through the kitchen wall. Sakura's flinched and crawled back. She touched her face where he struck her and felt it already flush a burning red with pain. "How _dare_ you." He roared and took a threatening stride towards her.

She scrambled backwards waiting for the next blow. His eyes burned with anger. "Don't you have any shame?"

She closed her eyes and felt tears brimming.

 _Fight…_ she told herself but her body would not listen.

"After everything they've done to this family, to our people…you'd defend them, him." He was hovering over her now with balled fists. "You disgust me." He spat.

Sakura pressed herself against the wall as Toya descended into a rage.

 _Fight…_ She told herself again.

"You…can't talk about shame." She said in a trembling voice.

It was trembling, but at least she was finding her nerve again.

"Say that again." He dared and narrowed his eyes.

Sakura back into the fridge and pulled herself up. She was cornered now. "You, Toya broke this family up years ago, not me. You can't stand there and say that you care about the East or the West when murdered all those people at the palace." Every word she spoke she could tell she was aggravating him more, pushing him to the edge. "Everything your doing now, it's for your personal revenge because _you're_ ashamed." She stopped two feet in front of him. "Because we both know mom would be still here if it weren't for you."

As soon as her words left her mouth Toya's rage evaporated for a moment. There was a moment of absolute silence. In that moment Sakura saw a very vulnerable look cross his face and even…pain. She thought she had gotten through to him. Maybe they could figure this out together…

But as soon as that look came…it disappeared in flash, and rage took over.

Toya's hand shot out and knocked her onto her back. Before she even recovered he was on top of her. His hand grabbed and crushed her neck. She chocked and clawed at his arms to no avail.

"Do you think because you're my sister that I won't kill you?" He laughed and cracked her head against the wooden floor. He released her momentarily but she knew that was not the end of it. "To think I trusted you…I thought we were alike." He spat.

She turned around and tried to crawl away. Her vision dizzied from the oncoming concussion. The back of her head throbbed. He grabbed her ankle and reeled her back with ease. She clawed at the floor but there was no getting away from him.

Her words had gotten to him, he was seeing red. His foot kicked her in the ribs, the stomach winding her instantly and she struggled to catch her breath. She clutched her body and cried in both pain and fear.

 _Syaoran…_ she thought and squeezed her eyes shut. _Please come back…_

She knew it was wishful thinking. Toya had waited for Syaoran to leave on purpose. He had the opportunity to take Syaoran out if he wanted, but it seemed Sakura had pissed him off more. And besides…he couldn't face Syaoran by himself, he didn't have the nerve.

"Toya, stop!" She screamed thinking naively that she might get through to him. "Stop it!"

"You're just like dad, you know that?" He said bitterly and grabbed her by the collar of her top. "Spineless, the both of you. Neither of you doing anything to preserve our mother's name. _I'm_ the one fighting for her, _I'm_ the one finishing her work, what she wanted." He barked and shook her. "What do you do? You and dad? You sit behind your little desks writing your little articles. Dad's a disgrace." He growled and brought his face close to hers. "But you, are nothing but a lying slut."

He raised his fist high, just like back at the palace. Only this time, it hit her. The corner of her upper lip split immediately and she almost chocked on the blood rushing into her mouth. For a second, she blacked out.

 _Syaoran…you were right. Oh God, please come back… you were right…_

For the first time she acknowledged what she blocked out for so long.

Toya was going to kill her.

He grabbed her by the hair on the nape of her neck and brought her upper body to face him. The tears were spilling down her face, blood trickling onto the bare skin of her legs.

"I trusted you." Toya said in a low trembling voice. "We could have finished our mothers work…together."

Sakura's conscious was fighting to stay awake, his face was blurring. She had enough strength to shake her head.

"Mom…never would have wanted this…" She said in a slurred voice.

Toy twisted his mouth down with distain. He didn't recognize this girl. She was not who she hoped she would be. Or maybe…he had changed too much. Either way, he was done with her. She was not worthy to live in his new version of Tomoeda.

"I'm going to kill him, your little boyfriend." He whispered into her ear. "Know that when I do…It will be because of you."

"Toya…no…don't, please…" Tears mixed with blood. "Don't do this…please…"

He looked down at her. His fingers were knotted into her hair so tightly she felt he's rip her scalp off. But none of the pain she was feeling came close to the idea that Toya would hunt Syaoran. Toya took in her face, her bloodied face and felt no guilt. He had shed those useless emotions years ago.

She thought he was going to punch her again when a click from behind them stopped him. Both Sakura and Toya looked up.

In the doorway, Fujitaka stood with a loaded rifle in him hand, pointed at Toya.

Nobody stirred for a second. Sakura shook her head. This was so wrong. This was all so…so wrong.

"Dad…" She breathed in fear but also relief.

"Get away from her, Toya." He said in a level and stern voice.

Toya cackled, almost amused. A sickening deranged look in his eye made her think he was enjoying this.

"You're going to kill your own son? I'm intrigued, dad."

Fujitaka cocked the gun. He was unmoved by Toya's irreverence. "If I have to. I won't hesitate. Get away from her." He repeated.

Sakura gulped and watched as Toya glared at him with a hate that had been brewing for years.

"You're OK with this then? Her," He said shooting a look at Sakura. "Fucking a soldier? Being on their side. Bringing shame on our mother's name? No, of course you are." He said and roughly released Sakura. She scrambled away from him and hugged her knees, trembling.

"Because cowards like you, dad, are happy to look in the other direction. Aren't I right?" Toya took a step towards Fujitaka, one eye on the rifle. "When you let mom into those riots. It should have been you. But you were always were a coward. Happy to be a champion of the revolution weren't you, dad? But too cowardly to do what mom could."

Fujitaka did not show any reaction. He kept his face hard and detached from the son he didn't recognize anymore.

"The only shame on this family, Toya, was you. Only you."

Toya smirked, followed by a dark laugh that made Sakura feel sick.

"Now get out of my house." Fujitaka warned taking another step towards him. "And never come back."

For a moment Sakura feared he wouldn't leave. She felt so helpless. Would Fujitaka really kill Toya?

"Don't think for a second I'm intimidated." Toya said darkly. "I could kill you both now, easily." Toya walked right up to the nose of the gun and tilted his head to the side in a cocky way. "But when destroy the foundation of Tomoeda, and re-build it how it should be, I want you to be there to realize how much of a coward you really are."

Fujitaka kept his stare. "It's times like this that I'm glad your mother isn't alive to see you. The shame alone would have killed her."

Toya's smirk fell from his face as his eyes narrowed.

Finally, he stepped back. The nose of the gun never left Toya. He opened the back door and stopped. Glancing over shoulder he caught Sakura's petrified eyes. She struggled to believe that that man once read her stories, tucked her in and was in her eyes, a protector.

"If I find you in the West again," He said. "I'll kill you."

Sakura felt her spine chill and she shuddered.

Toya left and the house as quiet.

Fujitaka put the rifle down. His ands began to shake from the encounter.

"Sakura…" He breathed, thankful that he'd come home just on time to hear her scream. He always kept the rifle in shed…just in case.

"Dad…" She said and combusted into tears.

He collapsed to the ground in front of her and hugged her tightly, tears forming in his old, tired eyes.

"Dad…I-I'm sorry…I'm so sorry. I brought this here…I brought this on us…."

The blood from her mouth was staining his shirt but he held her tight, afraid to let go of the one thing he's been trying to protect for so long.

"No, Sakura…this is not your fault. It's not your fault." He began to chant and cradled her in his arms as if she were a child again. When all those problems were so miniscule and he knew how to make it better.

But to Fujitaka's great distress, he didn't know how to help her. He didn't know how to stop this great thing that was beyond her control.

He could just, for now, hold her.

X x x

 **To all the latest reviews, thank you sincerely.**

 **Writing is a secret passion of mine. I've told nobody in my life about it and I love sharing it with you. I'm trying to improve on my skills and both your feedback and criticism are wonderful.**

 **Thank you.**

 **P.S. I'm not much of a writer for lemon scenes so apologies if they are lame!**

 **x x x**

Yukito brought the car to a stop.

He blew hot air out of his cheeks and gambled with the idea going back home.

 _No._ He thought. _I have smooth this over._

He moisturized his hands and looked out at the Kinomoto house across the street. He wiped the remaining sweat of his palms onto his trousers and looked at himself in the car mirror. He was disgusted that a man of his status was reduced to this. But he had no choice. His transferral to the North was so close to being approved, he couldn't have Sakura blabbing her mouth around town about the encounter between them after the palace attack. She'd ruin everything.

And with the shit-show brewing in the East in the last few days, he needed to get the fuck out of there. He was better than this.

He had to smooth it out, keep her quiet.

He had many different ways to approach it. He considered threatening her. But he had nothing on her. Nothing juicy enough to buy her silence. And someone like Kinomoto Sakura didn't take well to threats. No. That was a bad idea.

He had considered grovelling to her.

 _I'm so sorry. Please forgive me. I'm a weak, pathetic man. Show some compassion!_

He twisted his nose in disgust. No, she'd hate that as much as he would.

He went through a flurry of excuses in his mind.

 _I was drunk._

 _I was in shock._

 _The medication the paramedics gave me was strong, I wasn't in my right mind._

 _I was just so in love with you…I thought I was being romantic!_

 _YOU were flirting with ME…_

 _I thought you wanted it…_

 _I'm gay! I just needed you as a cover up, you understand that, right? I didn't mean to scare you, I don't understand it myself!_

Yukito shook his head. In the end, all he could think of was sincerity, something he lacked severely. He grabbed the battered bouquet of flowers from the back seat, rubbed some lip balm on his lips and got out of the car. He ran his speech through his head.

 _'_ _Sakura, I didn't mean to frighten you. Please can we look past this? I'll never bother you again. This is my sincere apology. Here's some flowers, forgive me.'_

As he approached the house he heard the front door opening. He ducked down out of instinct. He only wanted to be seen by Sakura. She couldn't have people know anything about this. He ducked behind the bushes and heard footsteps leave the gate. Yukito peeked out through a gap.

He turned his mouth up in distain and surprise. The Lieutenant Colonel had just left her house, at this time.

 _Slut._ He thought.

The General's son. That's whose she meant. She was in love with _him_. Yukito squirmed. No matter how highly he thought of himself, he couldn't out-do the General's son.

 _Wait…_ He thought. _That would certainly be a scandal…_ He thought to himself. He stayed in the bushes for a while and began to mull over a new plan. Perhaps blackmail was the way to go. He'd expose them unless she kept her trap shut!

Yukito shook his head. No, it would not be a good idea to threated the General's son. Definitely not.

A scream from inside the Kinomoto house made him flinch. He didn't move. That sounded like Sakura. Footstep came towards to house. It was Fujitaka. Yukito stayed tucked away. If he were caught like this, waiting in the bushes it's be harder to clear his name as a pervert.

Another scream came from the house. Fujitaka froze and ran towards the house out of a Yukito's sight.

"What the fuck is happening in there?" He mumbled to himself but made no attempt to help.

Silence.

Nothing.

Yukito knitted his brows together and listened but no movement came from the house.

A door opened. Yukito peeked over the wall and saw a figure leave from the back door. The tall figure walked from the house. Yukito squinted. There as enough moonlight to make out it face.

Yukito's jaw dropped.

The figure escaped over the back wall but there was no mistaking what Yukito had seen.

 _Toya Kinomoto._

Yukito smirked and stood up a little taller now.

He dumped his flowers into a nearby trash can and laughed to himself as an idea formed in his mind.

 _I'll take that bitch off her high horse AND get my transferral._

He rubbed his hands together and drove off silently into the night.

X x x


	27. Plan B

**Hi! :)**

 **I'm making preparations to move back to my home country (stressful) but writing in my down time.**

 **Enjoy. :)**

Syaoran followed with cautious steps, careful to stay at least three feet behind her.

As they descended down the basement level, Mizuki's hair fell to a darker shade of red and osculated behind her back and forth like a whip. When she approached him earlier to follow her, he felt the familiar sense of anxiety rise from the pit of his stomach. Her cold presence seemed to always have that effect on people.

But Mizuki was more off than usual today, almost begrudgingly bringing to him to who knows where.

They reached the basement to where the storage of rations were kept. Syaoran felt a shiver amongst the damp cold and wet walls. They had reached a dead end. He didn't ask any follow up questions. Lieutenant General Mizuki hated frivolous questions. He stayed silent.

Mizuki faced the brick wall, her back coldly facing Syaoran. Alone and isolated, Syaoran began to grow suspicious as warming bells went off in his head. Had Mizuki discovered that his loyalty did not lie with Base? Syaoran took a small step back and hovered his hand over his gun. He had come too far to fail Sakura now. Although even the possibility with an altercation with Mizuki made him sweat. While he had the strength, he knew no one who could out-combat Mizuki. That's one of the reasons she is ranked so highly in the military, if not the best.

"You've been asking why we haven't retaliated." She said suddenly.

Syaoran's hand relaxed a little.

"It just seemed against protocol…closing off the Western wall and retreating." He replied, trying to be subtle. Every day that went by where the military were silent confirmed to Syaoran that something sinister was being planned. And although Syaoran was a high ranking Lieutenant, there were far superior nameless men and women whom his father shared information with.

Mizuki just nodded and lifted her hand to flick a switch Syaoran never noticed before. He stepped back, startled when a section of the brick wall moved back to reveal a glass elevator.

"Come." She said before stepping in.

He followed her in and gawked out in awe as the elevator closed behind them and began a slow descent. He felt his stomach churn slightly at the dramatic drop below where he could see men and woman milling around like ants pushing dials and reading data off huge computers Syaoran had never seen before. All this time this giant lab existed beneath the training fields and he was clueless.

Mizuki stared out at the sight with no particular impression, a sign she had been down here many times before. Syaoran was too baffled to speak.

"Our technology has not caught up to that of the former outside world yet." Mizuki said with her eyes fixated on the view below. "But we are beginning to catch up thanks to recent findings."

Syaoran blinked and gulped as they descended to yet another level.

Just when he thought he had seen enough for one day, his eyes landed on something that made his gut quiver as the terrible feeling that arose from him before came back tenfold.

"What…is that?" He whispered, almost only to himself.

Finally, Mizuki's eyes brightened up with malevolence and her lips curled back with a sort of glee.

"That, is Plan B."

X x x

Her breathing was shallow.

Every now and again her heavy eyes would struggle to open, unable to understand the blurred surroundings.

Eriol placed a damp cloth over her forehead in a poor attempt to keep the fever down. The pointlessness of it was evident. He felt a weight on his chest to see Ruby's health deteriorate so rapidly over the past few days. Her skin was damp with sweat and her skin had permanently succumbed to a sickly jaundice yellow. Unable to find the strength to sit up, or even keep food down, her body was wasting away. And there was nothing Eriol could do to help her.

"Ruby," He whispered softly to her, hoping to stir any sort of reaction.

He watched helplessly as her bony chest rose up and down. She was dying.

Outside the door, Tomoyo stood gripping a basin of water in her hands with a lump in her throat. She too, felt helpless as her best friend was fading from this world. She stood unable to move, rooted by the fear of seeing Ruby's skeletal state, and the fear of disturbing what might have been the last moments between a husband and wife.

She entered with a look of apologies in her eyes. Tomoyo clenched her jaw from gasping. It seemed as each hour passed her appearance worsened. Eriol looked up. Dark circled hovered under his eyes. He had barely slept or left her side.

"You need to eat something. Or at least get some rest." She whispered to him knowing already he wouldn't leave Ruby.

He shook his head. "I'll be fine." He replied in a tired voice.

Tomoyo replaced the water, choosing not to argue with him. She turned to leave, feeling like an intruder. He caught her by the wrist unexpectedly.

When she looked at him, his head was hanging low. Tomoyo had never seen him look so distraught, so utterly helpless. Even in the face of tanks, conflict and confrontation, Eriol never wavered. His stone-like strength had always come true for him, the villagers praised him for his resilience, but now…Tomoyo had never seen him so…so defeated.

"I feel so helpless." He said and held her wrist almost pleadingly.

Tomoyo came closer and rested his head against her hip. She placed a hand on his head and let him lean on her just for a moment. She restrained herself from running her fingers through his hair. She looked down at Ruby and wished with all her heart that her eyes would flutter open, that she'd just smile in her innocent way and grab each of their hands, tell them not to be so worried, stop under-estimating her. They both looked at her, mentally willing her to come back from the edge of death. She was the counter-weight in their lives. Eriol's stoniness, Tomoyo's defensiveness and bitterness was counter-acted by Ruby's innocence and frailty. She was they balance they both needed. Both couldn't bear to think of their lives without her.

But she just lay there, barely breathing.

Tomoyo's chest stung and she quickly broke away from Eriol. "There's nothing you can do except be with her now." Tomoyo said with her voice cracking at the end. She had to leave before she cried again. Eriol doesn't need her emotions right now. And Tomoyo felt like a traitor.

Once downstairs, she pressed her back against the wall and breathed deeply into her hands to compose herself.

 _What is she dies…and I never told her about me and Eriol? Is that better or worse? Was I ever her friend or just a traitor?_

Tomoyo bit her lip as her inner conscious tortured her. Was it really possible to love Eriol and Ruby that much? But she did. She loved Ruby so much…she didn't want her to die…she didn't deserve to die…and she didn't deserve to call herself a friend.

The radio in the background was the only sound that rang through the grim atmosphere of the house. Tomoyo was barely giving it her attention until a familiar voice coming from it shook her from her thoughts.

She approached the radio as a voice she knew to be the King's, her father's came through.

 _'…must not condone barbaric behaviour. We must persevere to uphold the peace, principals and sanctity of Tomoeda, of Utopia. I implore all citizens to never doubt the resolve, nor the ability of our military. The attack that had been made on the lives of myself, your Queen and my children, is an attack on every single Tomoedan and their values. Please keep your fate in the military, keep your fate in me. Let those responsible for the attempt to harm us be met with just consequences-"_

Tomoyo angrily slammed a palm over the off button.

Her stomach churned at her father's words. _You fucking coward._ She raged mentally. He was so far removed from the reality, of the suffering. And as always, cowing down to the wills of the military.

 _Fucking coward._

She furiously wiped a tear from her eye and grabbed the laundry basket. She caught sight of herself in a mirror and stopped at her own reflection, which had changed so much over the past few months.

A princess who spend twenty-three years living ignorance like her father. A princess who ran away, avoided duty and responsibilities, and was still doing so. Someone who had power and influence, the ability to do _something_.

She bit the inside of her cheek and looked away from her reflection.

 _…fucking coward…just like your father._

Outside a chilly wind cut past her, almost drowning out the sound of the military jeep that rumbled lowly towards her. Tomoyo's eyes widened in fear.

The had finally come for them.

X x x

 _A few hours earlier_

"Syaoran." Sakura said when he was silent for too long.

She leaned in and placed her palms over his knees in attempt to calm the furious quake in him.

"Syaoran, we can't think about this now." She said in a low voice.

Syaoran had his hands clamped together, they were shaking violently with a thundering fury.

When he looked at her his stomach tightened and he clenched his jaw in anger. His eyes fixated on the red swelling of her cheek, sign of deep bruising already taking place. The corner of her upper lip was busted and the skin around her chin and jaw were starting to turn a deeper red.

She didn't want Syaoran to see her like this. But Utopia day was fast approaching, and she had to push her violent encounter with Toya from her head for now.

"I'm going to kill him." Syaoran said for the forth time.

Sakura swallowed and grabbed his trembling fists. "Please, we've other things to worry about. Toya is not a priority for us."

"He almost killed you!"

"But he didn't!" She responded annoyed and pulled her hands away. She gritted her teeth and looked away. There it was again, the constant need to defend Toya. It was like an instinct with her and she couldn't reason with it. No one had hurt her both physically and mentally as much as Toya, but still she could not let anyone criticize him. Her logical response was roared down by an unreasonable part of her. Despite the evidence, Sakura couldn't let go of the hope that under the violent and questionably motivated monster, Toya was still there.

She hugged herself and tried not to wince at the pain below. Syaoran's temper was flared at just the sight of her face, if he got a glance that the purple and black bruises developing on her ribs, there may be no calming him down.

Syaoran groaned and bolted up frustrated. "Sakura, you can't keep defending him. What he did to you shows he's gone too far. What will it take for you to realize he's not on our side?"

"What does it matter?" She said matching his frustration. "It's not important now. What's important is the plan. If you and Toya are so hell-bent on killing each other than can you at least do it after we overthrow the fucking government!" She yelled.

She didn't mean that. But she was too frustrated with being in the middle. Syaoran and Toya, both with targets on each others back, both with the means to do so.

Outside, Yue puffed silently on his forth cigarette in twenty minutes. His fingers were quivering as he brought it to his mouth, they haven't stopped their subtly shake since he seen her, since he seen what Toya had done to her.

Yue hugged himself tightly with his free arm and shivered. His heartbeat pounded uncomfortable in his head. Would, _could_ Toya really do that? A part of him wanted to remain in denial, to think that the Toya _he_ knew, or at least the idea of the Toya he knew would never be able to inflict such wound on such a small woman, his _family_. And yet, the evidence was on Sakura's face. The marks he left on her were physically uncomfortable and sickening for him to look at, yet they re-confirmed what Yue had chosen to ignore for too long.

He heard Sakura and Syaoran arguing inside but chose to remain out of it. His ears twitched to hear Sakura measly defence of Toya's heinous actions.

 _Is that what I sound like_? He wondered. Was he just as blind as Sakura was when it came to Toya? Yue felt guilt swim around in his stomach. He was the one to reunite them, and it could of caused Sakura her life.

"Please," Sakura begged and looked at Syaoran with her tired green eyes. "You said there was something urgent you needed to tell us, focus on that. Everything else…it can wait. I know you want Toya's blood…but that's not going to help anyone, especially me." She said in a voice that was surprisingly soothing. "I need you here, with me."

Syaoran wanted to flare up again. Nothing else mattered when he saw her state. All he wanted to do was tear through every village and deliver a painful death to Toya. But her tired, green, pleading eyes clutched him intensely around the heart.

He placed a hand softly over the non-marked side of her face and sighed, amazed at her resilience and ability to keep her eyes focused on what mattered right then and there. So, with every strength he had, he nodded.

Yue slid back the glass door suddenly and stepped in. His eyes were glazed with an emotion Sakura hadn't seen on his face before. Perhaps it was fear.

Yue and Syaoran stood looking at each other tensely for a moment before Sakura rolled her eyes. "You can trust each other."

Yue uncrossed his arms and took a seat across from him. Syaoran chose not to even think about how Yue had operated under the military for years, all the while being a rebel. He didn't like to admit it, but he was impressed by Yue.

"What did you find out from Mizuki?" Sakura asked in hope it would give them a way to help the westerners avoid casualty when the papers were printed. "Are they going to send the military in?"

Syaoran's face suddenly hardened and he sucked in a sharp breath as he recalled the information received from Mizuki not so long ago.

"No." He said. "No, it's much, much worse than that…"

X x x

Tomoyo stood rooted to the ground with shock.

As the military jeep halted to a stop right outside the Hiirigazawa house, she whipped her head from it up to the room Eriol and Ruby were in. She wrestled with the idea of bolting upstairs to warn them. But the jeep was already here, she wouldn't be able to buy them enough time.

Were they here to kill them? Was this it? Or had they found out she was the princess?

She gripped the laundry basket tighter and took a hesitant step back as the jeep door opened. She was concealed from view at the side of the house.

She heard one set of boots hit the gravel. When she peeked out she almost dropped the basket in shock. Syaoran looked up and down the empty road to check for signs of life. Satisfied there were definitely no soldiers around he walked towards the boot and opened it.

Tomoyo walked in small steps to the front of the house with wide eyes. Syaoran didn't notice her as he opened the boot and smirked followed by a small chuckle. He reached a hand in and Tomoyo raised her eyebrow with surprise as a small had reached up and grabbed it and Sakura Kinomoto clambered out of it.

"Not the most comfortable journeys." She said and rubbed a hand up and down her neck, nursing out an uncomfortable creak.

Syaoran gave an apologetic smile as he lifted her out of the trunk. "I'm sorry. It's the only way to get you across the walls since your permit was cancelled-"

Syaoran cut off when he finally saw Tomoyo standing there with her lips parted and an almost amused look on her face. She certainly wasn't expecting that.

Sakura looked over and began to fumble for an explanation. Tomoyo shot her hand up. "I don't even want to know." She said in a tired voice.

Sakura bounced out of the trunk with an antsy buzz around her. "Where is Eriol?" She said with her eyes wide and wired. Tomoyo recoiled slightly at the bruises on the lower left side of Sakura's face. She decided it best not to ask.

"He's upstairs. But you shouldn't-"

Before Tomoyo finished her sentence, Sakura whizzed past her, fuelled by the discovery Syaoran had shared with herself and Yue this morning.

Syaoran walked towards Tomoyo slowly, unsure how to approach her.

"You look better than the last time I saw you." He said and attempted a smile at his old friend.

Tomoyo's lips formed a tight smile and she casted her eyes down at the thoughts of that night at the palace attack where she spent most of the night drenched in Layla's blood. Seeing her without all that blood, Syaoran was surprised at how different Tomoyo seemed. In her peasant clothes and un-primed appearance, she could honestly have been passed off as a Westerner.

Tomoyo swallowed a hard lump in her throat. She glanced back at the house where Eriol had descended down into the kitchen to meet a wired Sakura. "Why are you here?" She whispered to Syaoran with almost frightened eyes.

Syaoran too, glanced at the house, amazed that in all these months Eriol and Sakura had been graced by the presence of Tomoeda's beloved Princess. "I'm not here to wreck anything." He said.

"Good." She said and placed a hand on her hip. "Also heads up, here, I'm Madison."

Syaoran pulled a face that said, _really?_ but decided not to question it further. There were important things to discuss inside the house.

When they entered the house Eriol was standing with crossed arms. His exhausted eyes narrowed at Syaoran's presence.

"I've been told you're on our side." He said in a tone that suggested he didn't believe it.

"You've been told correct." Syaoran answered, trying to keep down the hostility in his voice. He could tell that in his uniform, he was not trusted here in the West. He'd just have to prove himself.

"He can be trusted." Tomoyo said and placed the laundry on the table. "If the military wanted us, they would have sent more than one soldier."

Eriol didn't look convinced. "I hear you have some information. Let's hear it."

Eriol and Tomoyo saw Sakura and Syaoran's faces sink grimly. Eriol and Tomoyo had already suspected the worst outcomes in their minds, but now the were met with new, unwelcome anxiety.

X x x

 _One day ago_ _…_

 _"What's that?" Syaoran asked and immediately felt his stomach drop at the sight before him._

 _Mizuki smirked as some life sparked in her eyes. "That, is Plan B."_

 _Syaoran knitted his eyebrows together and tried to remember where he saw something similar to this. It was huge, standing at almost fifteen meters in its steel shell._

 _Mizuki leaned against the glass with open palms and peered down at it. "Most of the original parts were damaged or lost when we uncovered it from the East Tomoedan sea fifteen years ago. There were no blueprints, our scientists had to fill in all the missing blanks and parts, but it's almost finished and ready for testing."_

 _Syaoran parted his lips. "General Lieutenant…what exactly is it?"_

 _Mizuki slowly turned her head back at him with a sinister but amused look in her eyes._

 _"Come now, Li. Don't pretend to be so ignorant. You grew up in the south, you know exactly what it is."_

 _"But I didn't think there were any left. Or, none that we'd ever have access to."_

 _"We were fortunate enough that this one remained unused for the former outside world. Preserved just well enough to be studied and re-made."_

 _Syaoran began to shake his head. "But why would we want one of those…here? It was responsible for wiping out a majority of the former world…millions and millions of people…"_

 _"We don't live in the former world, we live in Tomoeda. The former world was divided, greedy and the loss of their world was their fault." Mizuki aid almost annoyed. "Tomoeda is united, we are better than they were. And we will do whatever it takes to keep our survival. Anything."_

 _Syaoran had to restrain himself from shaking his head, from pointing out that the former world, the one beyond the island of Tomoeda still lived, Tomoeda just needed to reach out. But he knew that someone like Mizuki, people like her, and his father and Meiling would always choose to remain blind to that fact._

 _"So, Lieutenant Colonel," She said and crossed her arms. "Let's go over your training. Do remember the name of this weapon?"_

 _Syaoran gulped and recalled it from the limited information available from the books of his military academy days. "If I remember right, it's a hydrogen bomb…capable of wiping out millions of civilians in one blast."_

 _Mizuki tipped her head against the glass and looked down at the bomb nestled in its steel container admiringly._

 _"Millions…" She breathed in awe of it. "Can you believe…there once existed more of these than all of the countries in the world…with the ability to destroy the world eight times over. Or in their case," She whispered to herself. "Just once."_

 _A silence fell between them. This was the first time the former world was mentioned so much in a conversation. The former world was taboo, no one was allowed to speak of it. Children were brought up to believe it was a fallen world, separate from them, and from the ashes there was Tomoeda. Eventually it was just bred out of textbooks, media and the minds of Tomoeda until the whole world became Tomoeda…_

 _"And to think…there are still some people out there who want to re-join that, who want Tomoeda to be a apart of that, who want the walls and our society to fall. Savages." She said and scowled._

 _Syaoran stood with his mouth open in shock. "General Lieutenant…if it is so destructive and…barbaric…then why do we have it?"_

 _Mizuki turned to him and crossed her arms. "Come one Colonel Lieutenant, use your head. You know that the population of Tomoeda is rising, our resources are being stretched beyond out limits. At the rate of growth it's expected Tomoeda's population will reach eighty million in five years. We can't keep up with that."_

 _"But how does a weapon of mass destruction help any of that?"_

 _She clenched her jaw, angry at Syaoran's inability to keep up. "Under the soil of the Western lands is rich natural sources, enough to keep Tomoeda going for at least another twenty years."_

 _Syaoran stuttered as Mizuki's plan was coming together in his head. "You can't force the westerners to give up their land and then force them into coal mines! Where will they live? How will they-"_

 _Syaoran broke off when the penny finally dropped and the last piece of Mizuki, and presumably his father's plan became disturbingly, and distraughtly clear._

 _Syaoran fell silent, and sick to his stomach._

 _Mizuki place the tips of her fingers on the glass and exhaled. "A solution to overpopulation, resources…and to those savages…" She muttered bitterly._

 _Syaoran was speechless._

 _"Lieutenant Colonel, I find your sudden worry and compassion about western lives…disturbing." Her eyes narrowed, laced with suspicion._

 _Syaoran fought hard to contain his composure under Mizuki's cold glare._

 _"Not at all General Lieutenant. I'm just…surprised…at the gravity of this plan." Through his teeth and with great pain he added, "Whatever needs to be done for Tomoeda, I will do it."_

 _She stared at Syaoran for the longest time, her cold glare making the hairs on his neck stand._

 _"You know, I was highly against sharing this information with you. But the General, your father went against my judgment."_

 _"You don't trust me, General Lieutenant?"_

 _"Trust is a luxury I can so rarely afford to give people." She walked over to him stopping inches from his face. "But being the General's son, my hand was forced." She said bitterly and slammed her hand on the button and the escalator ascended._

X x x

The four of them stood in silence.

None of them were able to absorb Syaoran's words. It was too bizarrely terrifying to think there was any truth behind it. Even Sakura, who had already heard it from Syaoran this morning, still wrestled with the idea that the military would use such a horrifying weapon.

Tomoyo was the first to speak. "No." She said and began to shake her head. "No that can't be true. The military are brutal but there is no way that they'd…that they'd annihilate everything and everyone in the West."

"That's what I thought." Syaoran replied. "But I seen it with my own eyes. I even have pictures of the plans."

"Is there anyway to shut it down? To make sure it doesn't go off?" Tomoyo asked.

"I don't know enough about it." Syaoran replied. "It's a possibility, but it's out of my depth."

Sakura had wondered about this too. It was decided that the photos of the plans were given to Yue to study. They didn't know what information he could pull from it, but Yue knew more about computers and technology than anyone else Sakura knew. It was safest with him. If there was a way to destroy the bomb, there was a chance Yue would figure it out. But it was a long shot...The focus had to be on evacuation should the worst happen.

"But they'd never get away with that." Tomoyo retaliated. "Northerners are not the brightest but even they'd struggle to stay silent if millions were obliterated."

"Maybe not now, but they will find the means to convince them." Syaoran said and exhaled. The military had decades of time to study how the population reacted. They'd find just cause to go ahead with the bomb, and lie about the death toll.

"What does that mean?" Sakura asked almost sighing that there seemed to be more bad news at every corner.

"The military will find just cause for retaliation. Something that will get civilians on their side. I've no idea what that will be."

"But surely people won't stand by for this?" Tomoyo said looking for a shred of hope.

"They will if they don't know the whole truth." Sakura mumbled.

"What does that mean?" Tomoyo asked.

"Any library I've been to, any statistics that are made public are laced with skewed statistics and data. People think the west make up fifteen percent of Tomoeda instead of sixty. They won't have any idea how high the death toll would be. They don't even know the East and North outnumber the South. Military also have decades of a smear campaign against the West going."

"Unless we tell them." Syaoran mumbled out loud. "On Utopia day, as planned."

Sakura gulped and nodded.

"If what you're saying is true." Eriol said after he finally weaned himself out of the shock. "Then we need to evacuate everyone. Now."

"It's not that simple. If anything sudden were to happen, the military might be quick to respond. We don't want to provoke that chance." Syaoran added. He had judged this from every angle. "The bomb is their plan B. If riots continue or they feel they've lost control of the population, they will use it to either instil fear to regain control. It seems they're finish with a regime that negotiates."

"So they're moving into one of pure fear." Sakura added. She thought the regime couldn't have been worse, she was so very wrong.

"So we sit and wait to be blown up?" Eriol snapped. "I can know what I know now and not warn my people."

"I'm not saying that. I'm saying we need to strategize. We need to make it so that the people condemn the military not to use excessive force."

"How the hell do we do that?" Tomoyo said feeling dizzy and wishing she was ignorant to all of this.

"The Utopia day paper." Sakura said. "I'm convinced it will have some influence over people's reaction, especially in the East. They're already angered, it won't take too much to-"

"You want to put the lives of _millions_ at stake for you _paper?_ " Eriol said with frustration and panic growing. "That's a big ask."

"For now it's all we have. Do you have any other ideas?" Sakura retorted.

"Yes, we get out now." Eriol clenched his fists. A million things ran through his head. "I need to get the word out-"

"Eriol, you can't cause panic." Tomoyo intervened, seeing the pressure squeeze him. "People are going to freak out and then the military will"-

"I don't care, it gives them a chance instead of waiting around."

"And where will you go?" Syaoran said cutting him off. "There is no part of the west that will escape the blast radius. Access out of the Western walls is restricted more than ever before. Where will go after you ensue panic? You'll only do more harm than good."

"You're one to talk." Eriol said becoming hostile. "It's not _your_ people being threatened. Your side of the wall is safe so don't even pretend you give a shit-"

"You think I'd be here if I didn't care," Syaoran said becoming too frustrated to deal with Eriol's suspicion.

"Stop." Sakura said in a manner so sharply that both men begrudgingly snapped their mouths shut. A silence fell between the four of them. Sakura shut her eyes and strategized a list in her mind.

First, she turned to Eriol. "The article will be published whether you like it or not. At the end of the day the military are going to find a way to deal with Westerners. We're here to help you. But first you have to trust us and work with us. Syaoran's right. Creating panic prematurely won't help anyone. _If_ they launch the bomb, we need to get as many people out of the west as possible."

"How can we do that?" Tomoyo asked. "The East is too far, and the South would never accept us."

Sakura nodded. "We need to move them North. It's closer and more accessible."

"They'd never take us." Eriol said. "Not while the King continues to demonize us following military orders. He'll condemn us to hell before he welcomes a single one of us."

Syaoran casted his eyes to Tomoyo, who swallowed hard and tried to keep herself neutral to Eriol's hatred towards her father and monarch.

"You're right." Syaoran said. "Northerners worship their monarch. It would only take one of them…to change the minds of many."

Tomoyo would not dare to meet Syaoran's eyes. She knew the true meaning behind his words. She felt a weight push down on her heavily.

"You really think monarch have that much influence?" Sakura asked.

"Absolutely." Syaoran nodded and glanced at Tomoyo briefly, who would not look at him. "Northerners have been so far removed from real life. They're sheep. They'll oblige anything the monarch says or does. It's always been that way."

"There is no hope looking to the monarch to help." Eriol repeated. "As if they could possibly understand our plight. They've never done anything for us. So, damn them to hell."

"I can't see the King being swayed." Sakura admitted. "I've heard the Princess has a strong hold there, but she's been absent for weeks. Even if we could reach her, the chances of her help are laughably thin."

Syaoran and Tomoyo stayed incredibly silent. Tomoyo felt her forehead break into a small sweat with every word Eriol said. Her mouth ran dry and Syaoran's subtle but intense glances were giving her heart palpitations.

Sakura hugged herself and wrestled with indecision. Syaoran has said they _may not_ use Plan, B, the bomb. It was their back up. But could they really risk it? She did not value her paper enough to risk millions of lives. But what if they used it anyway? The General was determined to make Tomoeda survive…it was either open up to the outside world, or genocide.

"Even if the North magically decided to help us, the walls are shut, how could they be opened?" Eriol asked.

"There is someone who has access to override the electric door for a period from a safe location." She said referring to Yue, whose years of undercover work continued to leave her in amazement.

Eriol rubbed his face and breathed out loudly into his hands. "This is…insanity."

Sakura nodded. "But I need your cooperation." Sakura whipped out her notebook. "I need all the information you have about unlawful incarcerations, people who have gone missing, military brutality…everything. I also need you to set me up with as many interviews with as many witnesses as possible. We're running out of time. Will you help me?"

Eriol eventually nodded and they quickly became absorbed in the mission.

Tomoyo had discreetly stood up and slipped away, but Syaoran was not going to let her away that easily. Sakura and Eriol were too distracted to see Syaoran slip through the doorway and outside.

Tomoyo leaned her back against the wall and her hand fluttered to her chest as she suddenly found it hard to breath. Her mind struggled to come to terms with what Syaoran had told them, and struggled more with the idea that _she_ could do something.

She snapped her head to the right when she heard footsteps coming her way. She just knew from the look on his face, she wouldn't like what he would say.

"Don't." She said already angry. "I know what you're going to say and the answer is no. There's nothing I can do."

"Didn't you hear anything I said back there?" He said keeping his voice low as to not attract Sakura or Eriol's attention. "Nothing in the West is safe."

"Yes, of course I heard you!" She snapped and hissed lowly. Her heart was racing with panic. "And we will figure something out but if you honestly think there is something _I_ can do-"

"You heard Sakura." He interjected and took a step towards her. "Whether it's a bomb or an invasion, westerners need _somewhere_ to go. The North is out safest bet. Northerners will do whatever you say-"

"You honestly think I can go against my father and win? That I can tell them to welcome westerners into their wall be by the way, the military have a fucking _bomb_? I'd be sent back to the psychiatric ward if the military don't execute me for treason first!"

"I'm not saying that, Tomoyo. But you know there is something you can do!" Syaoran was trying to hold back his frustration but failing. Because they both knew Tomoyo was beloved in the North. Maybe she couldn't completely outrank her father but she certainly plant seeds of doubt in the peoples mind. The revolution was already beginning in the East, and Tomoyo knew she could make that spread.

Tomoyo shook her head. "No. You're asking too much of me, Syaoran." She said and silenced the voice in her mind that was screaming otherwise. "I'm not going back there. I'm not the Princess anymore. I'm needed here, there are people here counting on me."

"That's not the reason you're staying, is it?" Syaoran said and hardened his face.

Tomoyo hugged herself, hating how Syaoran was narrowing in on her motives. "Of course it is. I'm not the same as I was back then. You don't know who I am now. People here need me to stay."

"People need you, or _he_ needs you?" Syaoran replied and Tomoyo dropped her arms to her side in shock. "No," Syaoran continued. "No, that's not it. You need him, don't you?" Then Syaoran stopped and realized Tomoyo's main motive for abandoning her duties of the North. "You're afraid. You're afraid if he finds out…who you really are."

Tomoyo said nothing as her hardened face began to crack. She looked back towards the house and her eyes saddened. "He wouldn't forgive me…" She whispered. "He'd look at me differently. They hate the monarch here, hate my family. If the villagers ever found out, they'd kill me. He'd never trust me again after lying for so long…If I went back…I'd lose everything." She bit her lip and swallowed painfully. "And I'm finally so happy…"

Syaoran breathed out as he tried to reason with her. "Tomoyo, just tell him." He said softly, trying to break through the last icy panel she was holding up. "He will understand. He has to. This whole thing…everything that's happening in Tomoeda at the moment, it's so much bigger than us. It's bigger than your title," Syaoran had had to learn himself about pushing past emotions to see the clearer picture. Tomoyo would just have to do the same if there were to be a Tomoeda in the future. "You have to go back. Like it or not, we need you. Tomoeda _needs_ you. Otherwise," Syaoran gritted his jaw. "Otherwise there won't be a West, one way or another."

Tomoyo held back tears. The weight of responsibility, which she had initially run away from, had come back to crush her. "What you're asking me to do…to give up…I don't even know if I can do what Sakura's asking, to convince people-"

"You just have to _try_ , Tomoyo. But I know you can." Syaoran felt he was finally breaking her.

Suddenly, Tomoyo's face hardened again. She narrowed her eyes and shrugged off his hand. "Well, I'm sorry to keep disappointing you." Shae spat ad turned to leave before he could see the guilt consume her face.

Her heart was racing and in that panic, she chose to be selfish. Her own self doubt had scared her into a corner where she wanted to curl up and wait for the worst to come. Because at least there, Eriol was in sight.

"Tomoyo, people are going to die." Syaoran said following her. "You can't keep your head down and do nothing!"

"You mean like you did!" She retorted and turned to him with a cold glare that halted his steps. "You talk all high and mighty about duty and responsibility but you were willing to keep your head down at Base for years, weren't you?" She fired back which hit a sore spot with Syaoran.

"At least I can claim ignorance while I sat behind castle walls! It's a poor excuse but at least I have one! What about you? You _knew_ for years about the West, about how they lived and you chose to keep your head down! Just because she's convinced you to have a conscience doesn't excuse the fact that _you_ have some responsibility for years of suffering here. So, don't you _dare_ tell me about what I should do." She knew she was deflecting, but if it got Syaoran off her case, she didn't care.

"I'm not excusing myself." Syaoran defended and stood unmoved by Tomoyo's words. Syaoran had known this for a long time. He had battle with his crimes already. But focusing on them would not help now. "I'm doing something about it _now_."

"You think that'll make up for anything?"

"No, but it might save millions."

There was a stand off between them. Tomoyo's eyes flickered towards the house and her chest tightened. Standing amongst Syaoran, Eriol and especially Sakura, Tomoyo had felt so diminished, so small and inferior to them. They were the people who could change Tomoeda, they were all natural leaders. Tomoyo… was just a coward, a fraud.

"You don't need me." Tomoyo said in an almost inaudible voice. "There is nothing I can do. Going back will achieve nothing, and I will lose everything." That was the only way Tomoyo saw this ending. She saw herself as a simple maid now, the life of a princess seemed so distant and alien to her. She didn't see herself as a leader, she'd fail...she'd fail and lose everything.

But, everything was already crumbling around her.

She had expected Syaoran to fight back with fury, but instead, his face descended into disappointment.

"Are you going to tell him anyway?" She asked. "Try to force my hand?"

Syaoran shook his head. Ratting Tomoyo out would achieve nothing. Only Tomoyo could do this. He knew if Eriol and Sakura were to know, Tomoyo would only flee. He could make her do nothing, she had to be the one to do it on her own.

"One way or another Tomoyo, this life here, this happiness you have, it will end." He turned to leave. "I want you to be happy, but like us, sacrifices have to be made if we are to have any future here."

Tomoyo turned away from him. Every second she remained, the pressure and weight of duty crushed her lungs. Her heart felt like it was beating in her head.

 _He's asking too much of me…There's nothing I can do…because I'm weak…because I'm not a leader..._

She hugged herself and for a second and gave into her conscience, which was gripping itself around her heart.

 _No, you're just a fucking coward._

X x x

Yue weaved in and out of the insanity around him.

He tried not to focused on the boxes and boxes of ammunition being moved around him. The smell of dirt reminded him how far into the West he was. His eyes scanned the muddied faces of nameless women and men milling around under Toya's name and was in awe at unquestionable loyalty and control Toya had over them.

Finally, at the back he saw Toya standing hunched over plans and documents probably detailing some horrible plan Yue didn't care to think about. Yue's heart pulsated and his palms began to sweat at even the thoughts of what he wanted to say to him.

Sensing his presence, Toya turned his head a fraction towards Yue and dropped a brown eye on him before bringing his attention back to the papers in front of him.

"Toya." Yue said, annoyed his own voice came out meeker than desired.

"I'm surprised you found my little hideout." He replied. Yue gulped. He had never heard Toya's voice so dark and bitter. "But I'm glad you're here."

Yue felt his chest swell with some relief at Toya's words, followed by immediate self-frustration. How easily he succumbed to the feeling of being wanted by him. It was a self-affirmation Yue felt pathetic about.

"In our next attack we need access along the Northern wall. I want you to-"

"No." Yue objected before he could let himself hear Toya's plan. He didn't want to know. Yue had to be firm this time. Too many times he let Toya manipulate him or re-direct the conversation in his favour.

Yue felt a quiver at his own refusal. Toya stood up straight and turned to Yue. His eyes narrowed and he waited for Yue to explain or give a reason as to why he would dare say no to him.

Yue had reached the end of his rope. Even he had to snap out of his own denial sooner or later.

"How could you do that? How could you hurt your own sister?" Yue asked in a quiet voice, almost afraid to hear his reply.

Toya's face remained stony, unfazed by Yue's confrontation. "She's not on my side. She is a traitor, and not my sister."

Yue began to shake his head in disbelief. "You don't mean that, Toya." He breathed and searched desperately to find something forgiving in Toya's eyes, some hint of regret for his actions or remorse. Yue found none.

"Ultimately," Toya said. "You're with me, or against me. She made her choice." Toya turned away from Yue, choosing to focus on the plan rather than on his sister sleeping with the General's son.

"Why does it have to be us versus them?" Yue asked and came to his side. "Can't you work with her?" He pleaded, trying to bridge the mammoth gap between the siblings.

"Did you know about it? About her and _him_?" Toya asked and looked him straight in the eye. Yue's breath stalled at the intensity in them. Toya's personality had hardened as the years went by, but Yue felt he could always reach him somehow, that the Toya he loved still existed somewhere. He saw now, he was beyond even Yue's reach.

Yue hesitated. "Know about what?"

Toya smirked. "So you did. You want me to trust you, when you are just like her."

Yue's chest tightened as he felt his influence or ability to reason with Toya slip ever further into a black abyss.

"If he meant us harm he would have done so." Yue replied, never thinking he'd ever have to defend the Colonel Lieutenant. "You have to think beyond revenge, Toya. Beyond the military and Mizuki. What about the life we wanted? The Tomoeda we envisioned? Opening up to the former world?"

Yue held his breath and searched Toya's face for a spark of recognition of the former days. Days where he had time for Yue, days where the talked for hours and hours about the future they would have. Days where Toya's love for Yue was so mutual, evident and unquestionable, unlike now where Yue felt himself slip more and more as an afterthought, as a resource.

Toya furrowed his brows and looked at Yue confused. "What do you mean, opening up?"

Yue blinked twice to see if he was joking, but Toya's face remained hardened. Yue swallowed, feeling his nerve break under his intense stare. "About opening up…to the former world…getting out of Tomoeda, of the regime."

A silence lingered between them and Yue's stomach churned under the silence.

"And why would I want to do that?" Toya finally said.

The air seemed to thin around them. Yue felt as if he were punched in the stomach as he realized something sickeningly awful. Toya's aims were far removed from what he thought. Yue began to shake his head as if that would undo what he had heard.

Toya didn't want to save Tomoeda, he wanted to control it…to rule it.

"You…you're just like them. Like the military. Like…Mizuki." Yue whispered.

Toya's temper flared in an instant and his fist pounded a space on the wall beside Yue's face. Toya leaned in with animalistic eyes and a gritted jaw. Yue flinched and shuddered and for the first time, felt the true violent fear Toya could instil. He thought of Sakura, of the fear and terror she was subjected to for standing up to Toya.

"I am _nothing_ like them." He hissed inches from Yue's face. "I will make Tomoeda better. That is the only way forward."

"You want to be a dictator. You want power. How is that at all different from being the next General?" Yue accused quietly.

Toya backed away and casted his eyes towards a board above the table. On it were targets. The General, Mizuki and other high-ranking military. "If that's what you want to call it, fine."

Yue stood with his lips apart in shock. He had never imagined how deep Toya would fall into this chaos. What worried Yue the most, is if Toya actually succeeded.

Toya's eye unexpectedly looked at Yue with pity. The anger had subdued for now. "Just go, Yue." He said and realized that he had exhausted Yue as a resource. "I don't have use for you anymore." With that last statement Toya looked away.

Yue thought his heart stopped for a second. He froze as he watched Toya begin to walk away dismissingly. Yue stumbled forward and suddenly grabbed Toya by the cuff of his shirt in a way that was almost desperate. Toya unwillingly looked down into his grey eyes and saw a broken desperation that pulled on the strings of Toya's ever shrinking heart.

"You…don't mean that." Yue said as a whisper.

Toya could feel a tremble in Yue hands. Toya wanted to shrug him off but something had rooted him still.

"What about the life we wanted? About the life you promised me?" Yue said with an edge or anger in his voice. "Do even love me anymore?"

It was a question Yue had asked himself far too many times but was petrified to ask. Because the answer would be painful beyond belief.

Toya's mind forced him to recall the memories of life before the West. To a time where he would have done everything and anything to secure a future with the man who now clung onto him so desperately. Yue, who when Toya's world was crumbling, remained a silent, un-wavering pillar of strength, who risked years and his own life for Toya's goals without question.

But most of all, a time where just being with him, was enough.

For a split second, Yue thought he saw that gentleness return to Toya's face. The Tomoedan regime had claimed and changed so many things, but Yue held onto the hope, it had not claimed Toya's soul.

Toya's rough hand raised up and rested itself against Yue's cheek, a touch Yue had not felt in an eternity. Yue held his breath as Toya's lips parted to speak.

"I've outgrown those silly, little dreams." He said in a hard but low voice. The hand the touched Yue's cheek delicately, now clamped onto his shoulder and pushed a cold distance between them. "And I've outgrown you."

No one around them stalled their work for a single second as Toya walked away from Yue. Everything continued as normal, ignorant to Yue's world and everything he knew crashing. As Toya walked further away from him, Yue's mind and heart imploded.

The Tomedan regime had claimed another victim.

Toya fought the urge to look back, his drive for the new Tomoeda kept his head forward. He needed to shed himself of Yue, and Sakura. They were obstacles and emotions that were stopping him completing his mission.

He reached out and grabbed Takeshi, Toya's latest recruit to his side and one he was proud of. The fact that he was recruiting Eriol's right hand men to Toya's side only boosted his confidence in his leadership.

"I need you to add another target to the list." Toya said to him.

"Who, sir?" He asked and Toya liked the loyalty in his eyes.

"The Colonel Lieutenant. If you see him, take him out."

X x x

"Let me take you home." Syaoran said and rested his hand on Sakura's.

She stopped writing and put down her pencil. Sakura rubbed her exhausted eyes.

"Will I be riding in the trunk again?"

"If I could switch places with you, I would." He said apologetically and smirked.

Sakura placed her hand on his knee and kissed him softly. He forehead rested against his and she relished this quiet moment she craved since this morning.

"Syaoran, what if we fail? What if this is all for nothing?" She whispered and sighed.

He brought her hand to his lips and kissed it. He could smell the lead off her fingers. "But what if we succeed?" He counter-argued with a small smile.

"It's hard to think that way though..."

He shook his head. "When we succeed, when _you_ succeed, and those walls come down, you and I are getting out of here."

She smiled and bit her lip. "Oh yeah? Where in the big, new world will we go?"

"Anywhere. No, everywhere." He responded. He brushed a rebellious lock of hair from her eyes. "Wherever you want to go, I'll follow. Just lead the way."

"You give me a lot of power." She teased and he leaned in to whisper something promiscuous into her ear that made her blush and struggle to restrain a giggle even in the midst of all the gloom around them.

"You really think we can succeed?" She whispered.

"I can't afford to think any other way." He replied honestly. The only thing that drove him forward was the future he would have with her post-regime. It just had to happen. It was all that Syaoran had to do what he needed to do now. He stroked her cheek and she leaned in to absorb what she knew would be a short-lived moment.

"Wait here." He said when he spotted Eriol in the back garden. "I'll be back."

Syaoran disappeared outside. He wanted to thank Eriol for what he did for him at the Palace. He got Sakura out. For that reason, he would be every thankful to him and in his debt. And so any hostilities between the two men had to be ironed out. Syaoran wanted his trust.

Sakura leaned back in the chair. This day had proved mentally and emotionally straining. Eriol had finally given her everything, all the information he knew and had agreed to use his home for witnesses to come to Sakura for their accounts. It was already dark outside and Sakura realized she'd been here for hours.

She massaged her palm, the strain of writing so much had given her an ache.

She placed her notes and books neatly into her bag and sighed knowing she'd have to wake up at the crack of dawn to put them in order.

But it would be worth it. I had to be done.

She brought a finger to her lip and winced and the dull pain residing behind it. Her thoughts foolishly fled to Toya and she shook her head to try and rid them. It was not the time to be preoccupied with that. She had to push on.

She hadn't seen Madison in hours. Sakura was hoping to speak to her too at some point.

A noise behind her startled her. Sakura stood up and from the corner of the room, Mrs. Hiirigazawa appeared into the kitchen. Her dark wavy hair curled in at her shoulders and her deep blue eyes fixed on Sakura.

"Oh, Mrs. Hiirigazawa I didn't realize you were back." Sakura said in a tired voice. "How is Ruby?"

Mrs. Hiirigazawa and Eriol were very similar in features. He had her eyes and silent intimidation unique to them. But from a glance at her face, it was easy to tell Mrs. Hiirigazawa had seen and witnessed far more hardships than that of her son. Sakura thought she must have been beautiful in her younger years, unplagued by the deep wrinkles which now ran along her eyes and at the corners of her mouth.

Sakura had not spoken much to her, and she realized this was the first time they were ever alone together.

Mrs. Hiirigazawa did not reply to Sakura's question. Instead she stood at the doorway, studying Sakura with a quiet reserve that made Sakura sense something off. Finally, her lips parted to speak with a low but stern tone.

"You need to stop now." She said.

Sakura looked at her puzzled and turned herself to face her. Mrs. Hiirigazawa's eyes were not harsh, nor were they soft. They were intense with an anxiety behind the Sakura couldn't understand.

"Stop what?" Sakura asked.

Mrs Hiirigazawa walked slowly into the dim light. The atmosphere shifted and Sakura became more alert.

"Stop everything you are doing right now. Turn around and go back to your side of the wall until all of this has settled." Then she lowered her head to look Sakura straight in the eye. "Before it's too late."

Sakura stood stunned and waited for Mrs. Hiirigazawa to explain, but a cold silence was the only response she got. Sakura narrowed her eyes and matched Mrs Hiirigazawa's stance.

"With respect, no." She replied.

Mrs. Hiirigazawa smirked and pursed her lips. "You and your brother don't take authority well. I'm guessing by those bruises on your face, you already know that too well."

Sakura gritted her teeth and felt a shiver up her spine at the mention of Toya.

Sakura didn't know how to respond to the sudden encounter. Exhaustion and surprise were keeping her tongue from retaliating.

"I never actually thought you would get this far." Mrs. Hiirgazawa continued and leaned against the counter with a look of almost admiration for Sakura. "But it's getting too dangerous. You need to back down, now."

"I don't understand." Sakura replied, finally finding her voice. "Why do you care? I'm doing this for you, for the West." Sakura had an anxious feeling brew in her stomach as Mrs. Hiirigazawa's eyes looked at her with a sliver of fear.

"Because I made a promise to your father that I'd turn you away should you ever came here. I'm ashamed to say I raised no objections to you being here for my own selfish reasons." A look of guilt grasped her face momentarily and she embraced herself as she recalled a past memory that seemed to cause her pain. "But now, I realize I've let your involvement go on far too long."

Sakura's eyes widened as too many questions began to flood into her head.

"Mrs Hiirigaza-"

"Oh, please." She interrupted Sakura and rolled her eyes. "Hiirigazawa was my husband's name. You, my dear, may call me by my maiden name."

Sakura blinked twice as the anxious feeling in her stomach began to claw upwards.

"Which is…?"

The woman smiled as her façade was allowed to temporarily dissolve.

"Omerson." She purred. "Nathala B. Omerson. And I believe you have my diary."

X x x


	28. Fading

**Took an unintentional hiatus.**

 **Lost my steam to write between moving home and finding work etc, but hopefully I can get back onto some sort routine that involves time to write again.**

 **Enjoy.**

x x x

 _17 Years Ago_

 _Under the veil of night, the car shot down the dirt roads._

 _Fujitaka's heart raced as his eyes dashed back and forth from the rear mirror to the road ahead of him. It was too early to breathe a sigh of relief. Behind them, the only light visible was the small blazes of the riots which has been raging o for days now, now only a spec in the distance in his mirror._

 _He gulped as they passed a sign that read 'Now entering West Tomoeda.'_

 _He kept his hands firmly on the steering wheel. Beside him, Nathala fought the sickly feeling simmering in her stomach. So far, so good. They had not been caught yet. But they were not there yet._

 _She clutched the side of her seat and glanced over at Fujitaka, who was focused on getting the to where they needed to be._

 _"_ _Take a left here." She said as a small turn off came into view._

 _Fujitaka did so wordlessly and navigated the car into a clearing._

 _"_ _This is it." She said with trepidation and unclipped her seatbelt._

 _It was deathly silent. The screams and cries of the riots had been hushed under the safety of the Western mountains._

 _"_ _Are you sure this is it?" Fujitaka asked, finally breaking his silence since they left East Tomoeda._

 _Nathala nodded and as if on cue, two figures appeared into the clearing carrying a dim light. Despite its appearance, Nathala had distant family here who had begrudgingly agreed to aid her in disappearing off the military's radar._

 _They didn't come within ten feet of them and waited for Nathala to follow._

 _"_ _Good luck." Fujitaka said through his teeth and turned quickly towards his car, anxious to be far away from her._

 _"_ _Fujitaka," Nathala said suddenly. Fujitaka stopped in his tracks and clenched his jaw. When he turned towards her, she saw that despite his actions, his eyes were still teething with pure hatred for her._

 _Nathala swallowed her shame and brought herself to speak what was on her mind. "I'm sorry…for what happened to Nadeshiko…no one could have ever imagined that-"_

 _"_ _Don't." He barked with a flash of anger he had bubbling inside of him. He slammed the car door shut and stormed over to her. "Don't you say her name." He hissed. "You have been nothing but poison since day one. If it weren't for you, my wife would be alive and my son would be at home instead of rotting in a goddamn jailcell!" He couldn't restrain his voice._

 _His voice rang out through the vast valley. He promised himself to restrain, to take Nathala to where she needed to go and never see her again._

 _Nathala hung her head and used the last of her strength not to cry. She didn't dare rebut his accusations. She bit her lip. Does he not think she was upset enough? The day Nadeshiko died, Nathala lost her best friend. Not a second went by where she didn't think of her. But she didn't dare say this in front of Fujitaka._

 _He took a small step forward. He swallowed his anger and said in a quiet voice, "Disappear, and don't ever come back." He was done with that woman. He would not waste another second thinking of her, loathing her. Fujitaka has a crumbling family to repair._

 _"_ _Thank you," Nathala whispered. "For doing this for me." Fujitaka was her last hope. The military were closing in on her at a pace she could not escape from. She turned to him, praying on any shred of kindness or mercy he would show her._

 _He balled his fists and stabbed a finger at her. "I didn't do this for_ you. _" He said bitterly._

 _Fujitaka's eyes dropped from her face to her side where a small hand was clutching the yellow fabric of Nathala's skirt. Fujitaka's face softened as a small pair of blue eyes avoided his gaze. Fujitaka kneeled down to the boy, who had been emotionally stunned into silence since his father died and the riots started. Eriol was only a few days shy of turning nine. He had clung to his mothers' side as chaos collapsed around them._

 _Fujitaka smiled at the shy boy. "Life is going to be a little tougher from now on. You'll be able to take care of yourself and your mother, won't you?"_

 _Eriol hesitated and nodded before hiding his face away._

 _If it were up to Fujitaka, he would have let Nathala rot in a prison cell. In fact, he would have wanted to hand her over to them himself. But Fujitaka could not deprive Eriol of his mother, the only family he had left. The boy reminded Fujitaka of his own son, who had not spoken a word since his own mother was murdered just four days ago. When Nathala came to him, begging for his help, Fujitaka could see Nadeshiko urging him to oblige. And in life, he couldn't say no to her._

 _He rose up to his feet. "I mean it, Nathala. Disappear. You are dead to me." He whispered out of Eriol's earshot. "If my children should ever come to you in the future, turn them away." He warned, knowing that when Toya would come out of shock, he'd try to continue Nadeshiko's work._

 _Nathala nodded. "I promise." She said._

 _Before Fujitaka's had reached the door handle she blurted, "You were a good husband to her."_

 _He did not react or acknowledge her. He simply got into the car, started it and drove away. With every mile he put between them, he tried to put away her awful deeds, her involvement, and to an extent, his._

 _Nathala stroked her fingers through her son's thick hair then grabbed his hand. His thin legs fell into a tired walk. He looked up at his mother with her stony face, cracking with uncertainty._

 _"_ _When can we go home?" Eriol asked in the meekest of voices._

 _Nathala clenched her jaw and fought the urge to swoop him into her arms and sooth his troubled thoughts. She had to toughen him up now. The future for them was bleak. But Nathala was determined not to let her flame go out. She casted her eyes to her son._

 _She had failed._

 _But she'd make damn sure to resurrect her fallen pride, through her son._

 _"_ _This is our home now."_

 _X x x_

"Omerson." She purred. "Nathala B. Omerson. And I believe you have my diary."

Sakura said nothing for a while as Nathala's words sank in.

"I don't understand." She said finally and glanced through the small window to where Syaoran was speaking to Eriol. "Nathala died. Years ago."

"No." Nathala said and crossed her arms. "I'm just very good at lying."

Sakura pressed a palm to her head and squeezed her eyes shut. She was so tired and delirious over the past few days, she wondered if this was actually reality. "So why are you hiding?"

"Isn't that obvious? The military wants me dead." Nathala said and bit the inside of her cheek in anger when she thought about the past. "None of that is important now. What's important, is that you get yourself out of this mess now."

"And I'll say again. Respectfully, no." Sakura felt the shock of Nathala's revelations slowly slide off her. She narrowed her green eyes and shortened the gap between them. "Do you really think I'm going to take advice from _you_?"

Nathala stiffened at Sakura's resilience. The shimmer of Nadeshiko's defiance flowed from her. "And what does that mean?"

"It means, when you contributed to my mother's death, you don't get to make demands of me seventeen years later." Despite her words, Sakura's heart raced.

Nathala dug her nails into her arms gritted her teeth at the girl who spoke to her with such resistance. "I think you'll find that it's your brother who can take credit for that-"

"Don't you _dare_ bring Toya into this!" She hissed and felt herself run to his defence.

"Why? Because he's such a golden child? Dare I ask about those bruises on your face?"

Sakura went to retaliate but fell short. Toya's beating had not faded completely from her face as traces of red and purple still lay over her arm and ribs.

Nathala raised her eyebrow and smirked. "You see what sort of person he is. So, you need to get out of this situation. Let Toya deal with it."

"Say what you want about Toya, I'm sure you didn't hesitate to turn him away when he came here."

Nathala twitched and scowled at her comment. Sakura scoffed. "Well done at keeping that promise to my father. Toya wouldn't be in this deep if you stuck to your word."

"I did my best." She spat. "I turned your brother away time and time again after they pulled his half-dead body from that river, but he kept coming back again and again and I…" She trailed off.

"And you saw an opportunity." Sakura finished for her. Because the truth was, Nathala did not fight Toya that much. They had the same goal, to finish what Nadeshiko started.

Sakura felt an uncomfortable feeling bubble inside her. Her eyes began to sting but she bit back tears of anger. She wouldn't cry in front of this woman. "You killed my mother. Not Toya. It started with you."

Nathala balled her fists. She felt a strange sense of familiarity in Sakura's eyes. The memory of Nadeshiko came hurling back, as did all the memories.

"Like I told your father, I only planted the idea in your mother's head, but she went through with the article. Those were her words. I didn't force the pen into her hand. Your mother was _not_ the angel your father may have painted her to be. She had a questionable past way before you were even born!"

Sakura was so angry she stuttered to come out with a counter argument.

"You say that like you did nothing wrong." Sakura finally said. "The walls went up after that article. People died. Why would you even suggest my mother do such a thing?"

"Why can't people just let that go!?" Nathala spat suddenly infuriated. "It happened, deal with it! My husband died when that mine exploded and no one, _no one_ did anything about it! Eriol lost his father, I lost my husband and the military played it down. No one came to _my_ defence. No one cared about us. So yes, I _suggested_ your mother say something-"

"It was a lie." Sakura butted in with a clenched jaw.

"And your mother knew that. She knew, and _she_ still went through with it. So, you can point the finger at me all you like, child, but your mother was the one who wrote it. And died for it."

Sakura had her back pressed against the counter for support. Looking at Nathala now, the bitterness in her face made Sakura feel like a fool for worshipping her words.

"None of that matters now." Nathala said and sighed. "I haven't seen Tomoeda this restless in years. I am sorry about what happened to your mother. And I know you won't believe me when I say I want you safe. I owe her that at least."

Sakura crossed her arms again. "How touching. But I'm afraid your opportunity to intervene has past. You seem to have had no problem with me hanging around until now."

"I thought you were harmless. What was I supposed to think? You were working for a Southern paper, publishing lies, I had no idea you were in this deep. If I had, I would have warned you off ages ago. Listen to me," Nathala said and approached her slowly. She placed a hand on Sakura's shoulder. Sakura looked from it to her with anxious eyes. "You need to stop this. There are other people who are going to take care of this."

"What does that mean? Who?"

Nathala was hesitant to answer. She flattened her lips into a tight line. "People more skilled at this than you."

"You mean Toya? You're working with him?"

Nathala did not reply, but her face said it all.

"What about Eriol? Does he know?"

"He knows only what's necessary. His passive approach of 'peaceful means' was working until recently. There will be war here and it will be brutal. Only an animal can win this."

"Toya."

Nathala clenched her jaw. She was not thrilled at handing the torch to Toya, but she knew no one else willing to shed as much blood as him. When it came to violence, Toya was an animal.

"Well perhaps Eriol would like to know." Sakura said and turned to leave her.

"Oh yes," Nathala said with a small laugh. "Go ahead, tell him his mother is a monster. I'm sure that's what he needs right now with the fate of thousands of western lives and a dying wife already on his shoulders."

Sakura paused. She glanced out the window to where Eriol and Syaoran were talking. Although Eriol seemed to be listening, his eyes were heavy with the weight of indecision, of the pressure on his shoulders. With everything happening, Sakura could not burden him with this too.

Nathala's hand clutched Sakura' shoulder when she saw she wasn't getting through to her. "Listen to me! I'm trying to warn you about how dangerous-"

"The only danger," Sakura interrupted. "Is you. You should have stayed hidden."

"Sakura?"

Sakura and Nathala looked over to see Syaoran and Eriol had come back in. The atmosphere was tense and Eriol's eyes immediately narrowed to his mother who had a talent for infuriating whoever she could.

Syaoran's spine stiffened. "Is everything ok?"

Neither of the woman relaxed their faces until Sakura shrugged Nathala's hand off.

"Nothing." She replied. "Let's go."

Syaoran followed and dared not ask her questions until they left.

Eriol walked up to his mother, who with every passing day became more wound up, tenser and tenser on the verge of exploding. The feeling she was hiding something from him grew from suspicion to obvious. The two of them were never that close, but he felt her become much like a stranger.

"What did you say to her?"

Nathala looked at the door where Sakura had left.

"That girl..." She mumbled. Nathala had often debated which of the Kinomoto sibling could carry the torch from Nadeshiko. It seemed neither of them could exactly. But she had more fate in Toya.

"That _girl_ is trying to help us?"

Nathala smoothed her hair back. "She could end up damning us all instead."

X x x

Meiling ignored the throbbing pain in her head as she walked through the courtyard of Base.

She kept her face neutral as she passed several cadets who made sure to avert their gaze from her. She could see how quickly their loyalty had switched to Syaoran after her demotion. It infuriated her. But she was not beaten yet. She was keeping her eyes peeled for an opportunity to best him.

One thing she had over him, was her unwavering loyalty to the regime.

She looked down at the file in her hand as she made her was to the conference room on the second floor.

Two soldiers on duty saluted her as they opened the doors to a very basic room. One table, two chairs. Behind the table, a slim man with pale white skin waited nervously. He was dressed extremely dapper; he had made an effort. His hair was slicked back with a tad too much gel and Meiling didn't like his smirk, it was too cocky for an Easterner.

"Lieutenant, thank you for seeing me on short notice. I-"

He jumped in his seat when Meiling slammed the file onto the table and planted herself down opposite him with a cold look that would not tolerate his overly-familiar tone. He shut his mouth tightly.

Meiling opened the file and scanned her eyes over it.

"Tsukishiro Yukito. Twenty-nine, pharmacist, unmarried, East Tomoedan." Meiling said flatly and unimpressed. "With such a boring file like this I'm intrigued to know what information you have that could demand military attention. It better be worth my time."

Yukito gulped and shivered in the cold room. He didn't expect the South to be so…rigid. He thought any information given to military would result in a warm welcome. He suddenly felt the reason he came here would fall short. And Meiling's cold glare was making him shrink in his seat.

"Y-yes." He said a little high pitched. He cleared his throat. "It's about…the Kinomoto's. Toya, to be precise."

Meiling's head snapped up to hear has name. Toya…the one that got away, the case where Meiling's career began to spiral out of control. The one Mizuki was obsessed with finding.

"What about him?" Meiling asked not masking the urgency in her voice.

Yukito straightened his spine and grinned, delighted her was being received seriously. He adjusted his tie and took his time before saying; "Well, before I tell you, there is something I'd like in return."

A few seconds passed and Yukito's request hung awkwardly in the air before Meiling burst into laughter that echoed harshly around the room. Yukito shuffled in his seat and tried not to look flustered. Meiling's face suddenly hardened.

"How about this, Mr Tsukishiro. You tell me what you know," Suddenly Yukito became aware of two soldiers behind him standing intimidatingly close. "and your body doesn't end up as a corpse floating at the bottom of the marble river."

"N-now wait! Just wait!" Yukito blubbered. "All I want is a transferral to the North! That's all! I know there's space up there. I've applied every year and I keep getting rejected. Please, that's all I'm asking for!"

Meiling sighed. She could cover every inch of the west with all the applications of Northern transferrals.

Meiling waved her hands and the soldiers backed away from Yukito. Meiling clasped her hands and leaned in.

"Ok. First, you tell me what you know. If your info is good enough, I will see what I can do about your relocation."

Yukito stopped sweating and nestled comfortably in his chair, smoothened down his hair and dug the last nail in Sakura's coffin.

X x x

Syaoran pulled the car in and killed the engine.

He looked over at Sakura, whose face was consumed in her thoughts. She blinked and realized they had arrived in the East. He had parked two streets away from her house to cause less suspicion.

"What are we doing?" She asked in a tired voice. They had stayed at the Hiirigazawa's until 1am. The East was quiet since the military had issued a curfew to contain the riots.

Syaoran said nothing and placed a hand softly on her cheek. If he could wipe away the frustration and worry from her thoughts he'd do it in a heartbeat. He himself was physically and mentally exhausted from his own façade. By day he was training the cadets in case of a war, by night he was sneaking around Base through files when he wasn't in the West meeting with the resistance in secret. He had their loyalty and it was growing stronger by the day. Seeing Chiharu so needlessly taken out had made their loyalty switch so much easier.

Then there was the bomb. Syaoran was agonizing over how to stop it. He could only put his trust in Yue to figure out the technical side of it.

Syaoran would have been able to handle it, had his injury not kept flaring up again and again.

But his biggest fear and worry, was Sakura, who seemed to shrink under the growing pressure as Utopia day came closer.

"You've been quiet since we've left. Just tell me what's bothering you." He said trying to coax an answer from her.

Sakura sighed and bit her lip. Syaoran worried about the increasing dark circles under her eyes. He knew she wasn't sleeping and cursed the fact that with increasing military surveillance, he couldn't even go home with her to guard her while she slept.

Sakura confided to her about Nathala's identity.

"Nathala Omerson…" Syaoran breathed and ran a hand down his face. "I remember my father going insane trying to find her. She disappeared of the map. Eventually we only had to pronounce her dead. All this time…"

Sakura nodded and then physically sagged her shoulders with the weight of indecision crushing her shoulders. Was she fit enough to fulfil the role she gave herself?

"Hey," Syaoran said and unbuckled his seatbelt. She sunk her head into his chest and sobbed breathes.

"I'm such an idiot!" She yelled into his chest. "I read her diary as if it was gospel and followed her every word."

"You didn't know, Sakura. You couldn't have."

"But still," She said in annoyance and lifted her head up to meet his eyes. "What if what I'm doing is wrong? _I'm_ leading people into war over what some rebel wrote in her diary! I just believed her without questioning anything! What if people end up dying because of me then how am I better than her-"

Syaoran placed his hands on both sides of her face and shushed her softly. He'd never seen her fly into such hysteria. "You're not like her. You're not doing this for yourself, you're doing it to save millions of people."

Sakura squeezed her eyes shut and began to shake her head. "You don't know that, Syaoran." She said weakly.

She remembered something Yue said, about how children of leaders always had something to prove. Sakura thought he may be right. Maybe she was doing it for all the wrong reasons, to justify her family name.

Syaoran stroked her cheek and sighed. "I _do_ know. I know you're the only one who can change this. I need you, we all do."

Sakura gulped, feeling herself sink under Syaoran's confidence in her. "What if I fail?" She whispered.

He shook his head. "You won't. We won't." He kissed her softly and pressed his forehead against hers. He couldn't believe that almost a year ago he was interviewing her for her test, and now, here they were in the midst of plotting and overthrowing the government, the world as they knew it. He would have no regrets.

"Come on," He said and unbuckled her seatbelt.

"Where are you going?"

"I'll walk you home. Things have been unstable around here."

"No," Sakura said shaking her head and wiping her eyes dry. "We can't risk being caught. Not while we're so close."

"It's just around the corner."

"I'll be fine." She said and smiled at him. "Go back to Base. I'll let you know if anything happens."

Syaoran clenched his jaw and reluctantly agreed. His selfishness and possessiveness were getting to him. It had been so long since they had a chance to be intimate. But he knew she was right. In order for everything to work, Syaoran absolutely needed to be seen to be in alliance with base. If he were seen with her, questions would be raised.

She leaned in to kiss him goodnight. As she pulled away his lips chased her, selfishly unwilling to her let heave him. Tiredness and the want to be intimate with him again made it difficult for her to stop him. She succumbed to his touch as he leaned over and his hands roughly ran over her breasts and hips.

Before his hands could travel further up between her legs she stopped him.

"Syaoran." She said softly and placed a hand on his chest. She heard him sigh quietly as he reeled back. He hung his head in the crook of her neck. And she cradled it in the silence.

"I know." She whispered. "I miss our dysfunctional life before. Isn't that fucked up?" She said and laughed into his ear.

He smiled and nodded. "Just think about when this is all over. We won't be a secret anymore."

Sakura forced a smile and nodded. She didn't dare speak of how her mind was going.

What if they don't succeed, and they have nothing?

Or worse?

She opened the door and hopped out, careful not to be seen. They both fought the urge to kiss each other again and Sakura felt a shiver as she turned the corner away from him.

The uncertainly and doubt she felt had evaporated, Syaoran had restored her confidence for now. Despite the news of the bomb, and Nathala and Toya and the weight of so many lives depending on the actions of herself, Syaoran, Yue and Eriol…she smiled with the ray of hope that they could actually succeed.

She turned the corner again towards her house. She stopped dead in her tracks as her smile disintegrated and in an instant, that ray of hope immediately was smothered.

X x x

"Why can't you for once in your life just listen to me!" She bellowed with her voice ringing out into the night air. "I was doing the right thing!"

Eriol restrained himself from punching the wall, but his mother was really pushing it this time. "Why did you tell Sakura any of that? She is the _only_ one who can actually help us and you're telling her to abandon us!"

"Oh, please. As if that child is capable of achieving anything!" Nathala scoffed.

"It's better than starving out here and being left to die by the military!" Eriol lashed out. "You had no reason to turn her away or reveal your identity. As usual you're only pushing you own fucking cause!"

" _My_ cause? Please, son, tell me what _my_ cause is."

"Let's not pretend you don't know where Toya is! If the military had him they'd stop taking food rations and then we'd have a goddamn chance at surviving! But you're too fucking selfish to give him up!"

"Oh yeah, Eriol. Blame me. It's easier that way instead of looking at the real problem! Toya had the means to actually go to war and win unlike Sakura with her flimsy article. And you'd want to wise up and help him!"

"Help him, help _him_! Are you fucking insane! You saw what he did to his own sister. You actually think he's stable enough to overthrow a regime!?"

"You need to stop being a peace-keeper Eriol! You can't overthrow the regime AND save people! People are going to die! It's not just about the regime! Your father was murdered eighteen years ago-"

"Oh, here we go again!" Eriol said and rolled his eyes. "Amazing how you always bring it back to dad and that incident." No matter what they argued about Nathala always brought it back to eighteen years ago to her husband's death which she could not let go.

"Incident? _Incident!?"_ She shrieked. "You father was MURDERED in the mine collapse and no paper is going to tell me otherwise!"

Back and forth they argued and Tomoyo said nothing as she changed the water and grabbed a fresh cloth. Their intense fights had become background noise at this stage. Or maybe it was that going on so long with such little food was making her delirious. But lately things have been the same. They fight, Nathala being selfish and disclosing Toya's location to no one, only for Tomoyo to be there to hold his exhausted body and whisper it will be ok.

Tomoyo wasn't watching what she was doing and the basin slipped out of her hands and landed with a terrible _clank_ on the ground. She squeezed her palm against her mouth and screamed into it. She felt like pulling her hair out or banging her head against the wall until it cracked open.

She hated the life she was living now. Hated how the bliss she felt in western life felt like eons ago and what she was left with was the horrid reality of Western life. The injustices they faced became so clear and Tomoyo could not drift by and ignore it anymore. But she didn't hate Eriol, or Ruby or the people, or the Mirth…she hated the unfairness, the struggle of western people, people who she began to realize as her, because in her heart, she was a westerner. Their struggle was hers.

And for the first time, she was truly beginning to see things as Eriol, Syaoran and Sakura did. Syaoran's words rang in her head for a reason. Because in her heart she knew there was something she could do that no one else could. She didn't know exactly what, but as the days went by, it was less like a feeling and more like a calling. And it grew stronger by the day.

She dragged her feet upstairs, abandoning the spilled water and clutching the cloth in her hand. Opening the door softly she shuffled into Ruby's room and sighed.

"They're at it again." Tomoyo said and sighed. "I thought my relationship with _my_ mother was bad." She sighed. Ruby was not able to be responsive and so Tomoyo spoke more freely to keep herself sane. And this way…it felt as if Ruby were still here, conscious.

"Honestly, I don't know how they even…" Tomoyo trailed off when her eyes landed on Ruby. Her arms went limp and the cloth fell out of her hand.

X x x

"Why are you even still here?" Eriol bellowed. "You so obviously want to scheme and plan with Toya so why even bother be here? I won't stop you!"

"Don't be so goddamn dramatic! You need me here Eriol! You can't deal with this pressure! I'm trying to help you and you just can't even-"

"Eriol!" Tomoyo's voice cut off their argument and they both snapped their heads towards her.

The anger in Eriol's face completely evaporated when he saw her. He ran over to her and cupped her pale face in his hands. She was shaking with wide petrified eyes. "Madison, what's wrong? Tell me." He said with his heart beating rapidly. He had never seen her so shaken. Even Nathala had parked her temper aside in seeing Tomoyo's panic.

"I-It's Ruby…she…I think…she's…" Tomoyo's mouth struggled to say what all feared the worst.

Eriol knew what she was trying to say before she could finish. For a second he felt himself go numb. His eyes flickered upstairs to Ruby's room and without a second to hesitate, he dashed upstairs taking two, three steps at a time.

Tomoyo, distraught and feeling suddenly sick hugged herself tightly. "I'm sorry…I-..I-"

Nathala shushed her and rubbed her hands up Tomoyo's arms calmingly. "It's ok." She said soothingly. "You stay down here, ok? I'm going to check."

Tomoyo nodded and waited outside as Nathala followed her son. Nathala was not prepared to see what she did. She gasped as Ruby's face was a terrible grey, her body quite still.

"Mother," Eriol said looking down at her. He took her wrist into his hand. "C-can you check? I don't…" Eriol felt weak at the knees. His thoughts racing so fast he couldn't even check for a pulse.

"Let me." Nathala said and placed two fingers on Ruby's wrist. She placed her ear over Ruby's mouth.

Nathala almost collapsed in relief. "She's still with us."

Eriol let his head flop down and exhaled with relief.

"But Eriol," His mother whispered. She shook her head. "I'm not sure if she's going to make it through the night." Nathala didn't mean to sound so clinical when she said that. But there was no sugar-coating it. Ruby's life was hanging by the thinnest of threads.

"I'm sorry." Tomoyo said appearing at the door. "I thought she…I don't know. I'm so sorry."

"It's ok." Eriol said and rubbed her elbow to calm her. Tomoyo couldn't take her eyes of Ruby. She was so…so grey. Her chest barely carrying the strength to move up and down. There was nothing about her that hinted there was still life there.

As if on cue, Ruby groaned so meekly, only for her head lobbing to the side did they realize she was trying to wake up.

Eriol broke away from Tomoyo and came to the side of the bed. "Ruby." He whispered to try and coax her out of her sleep.

She parted her dry lips and pried her eyes open as best they could to confirm it was him. Ruby smiled slightly, seeing him by her side. "Eriol…" She whispered. She tried to roll over to him, but her muscles could not obey her mind.

"Don't try to move." He said. "Just relax." He stroked her cheek and pushed raggedy strands of hair from her cheek. "I'm here."

"Madison." Nathala whispered and took her by the upper arm softly. "Let's leave them be."

Tomoyo nodded and backed silently out of the room. "I'll wait here." Tomoyo said and sat on the chair outside their room. Nathala sighed.

"Listen, girl." Nathala said and knelt before Tomoyo with a soft look in her eye. Tomoyo marvelled at how her personality could easily flip from stern to motherly so easily. "Ruby is not going to make it."

"She might-"

"We need to be strong with this war that's coming." Nathala said cutting her off. "Especially Eriol. I can't get through to him anymore. Ruby's death will be a blow to him. He needs to focus now more than ever. You will have to keep him from crumbling."

Tomoyo gulped at looked down at Nathala. "Mrs. Hiirigazawa…I can't-"

"Come on, dear. I'm old but not blind. My son loves you. It's hard for me to believe. I taught him better that to let emotional attachments distract him." Nathala placed a hand over hers. "But it seems you were an exception." She sighed. "But he also loves Ruby. When she goes…he will need you."

Before Tomoyo could say anymore, she left.


	29. Murderous Intent

X x x

"Eriol…"Ruby breathed.

"Save your energy, Ruby." He replied and stroked her thin hair. How quickly this illness was ravaging her. The bright smile of the woman he met first was wasting away. Her luscious hair thinned into the texture of straw. Her skin, damp and grey was clinging to her cheek bones, pronouncing the shape of her skull so clearly.

He felt the weight of regret sting him. All those times he ran out to take care of others, or the time wasted on arguing with his mother...or with Madison…

"Why…are you…crying…?" She asked, wheezing between each word.

Eriol shook his head. "Because, I've been a terrible husband to you. I should have done more, I should have put you before everything else. I'm so sorry…" The tears fell down Eriol's cheek. He had not cried since his father died.

Ruby chuckled and reached for his hand. "How...can you…say that?" She asked and kissed the back of his hand. "When I've…been so…happy…since I met…you?" Her thin fingers weakly clutched his hand. "You're…everything I…ever wanted…more than I…deserved…"

Eriol began to shake his head. No, he was far from what she deserved. He was not the husband he should have been to her. He pressed the back of his hand into her forehead and let out a small cry.

"Ruby…please forgive me. I'm so sorry. I will be better. I'll do better." He sobbed.

Ruby's palm touched his cheek and brought his face to hers. "Don't…say that…You've made me…so happy. I…failed you…"

"No, Ruby you never-"

"Listen." She whispered as her breathing got heavier. "Eriol, my love…I don't think…I have much…time…left…" Eriol began to shake his head and clutch her hand as if it would keep her with him longer.

"So…just listen…and let me tell you…these final things…"

Eriol reluctantly nodded and clenched his jaw. Ruby smiled and exhaled, bracing herself for something. "I'm sorry…for tricking you…into…our marriage." Eriol wanted to deny it, but he restrained from intervening in her last words. "I…was selfish…I wanted you…and loved you…so much…" She gulped, she had wanted to tell him this for so long. "I knew…I couldn't give you…children…I knew…I was sick but…I lied to you…I'm sorry…and I'm sorry…that I don't regret it. Because loving you…has made life…worth living…" A single tear fell and rolled down her cheek to kiss the pillow beneath her head.

Eriol was shaking as their years together flashed through his mind. Their highs and lows, scares and disappointments…they were happy. But Ruby knew, they were unfulfilled.

"The other thing…Eriol…and this…this is important…" Her eyes suddenly hardened with seriousness. Eriol leaned in to listen. "I don't have much longer to live…"

"Ruby, don't-"

"And when…I'm gone…you can't mourn me…too long…"

Eriol began to cry again and shake his head in denial. He didn't want to talk about the inevitability of her death. He could handle it when her illness was vague, when the possibility of death lay in the future. But now here it was in front of him.

"I want you…to be happy…promise me…you will…be happy…" She was using the last of her strength to get through to him. "You deserve…to be…happy…promise me…"

Eriol stuttered. He couldn't imagine life without Ruby, let alone see a future where he was free from his guilt and shame. "That's…all I want…promise me…you'll be happy…you…and Madison…"

Eriol's breath caught and his stomach dropped. "Ruby…"

Ruby smiled. "Eriol…I know…I've always known."

The shame and guilt returned tenfold. He thought he'd keel over. His poor, sick, dying wife knew of his affair. He hung his head low. "Ruby…please, please forgive me."

"Eriol…there is no need…" She stroked his hair and when he looked at her, there was no bitterness, no anger. "Seeing how happy she made you…she gave you…what I couldn't. She can give you...a future I can't…"

Eriol was speechless.

"And I know…that you…still loved me…regardless…so I couldn't…hate you…either of you…"

"Ruby…I don't know what to say. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry-"

"I don't want you…to be sorry." She said softly. "I want you…to be happy…"

There was a silence between them. He couldn't believe that she knew all this time. All this time he was hurting her in his infidelity. And yet, Ruby's face was so soft and angel-like, betraying no anger of hurt.

"Do you…love…her?" She whispered with a calm smile.

Eriol should have said no. Should have lied to reaffirm his commitment to how wife on her death bed. But he did not want to insult her, when she could obviously see through the lies.

"I love you both." He said and gulped. "I don't want to lose either of you."

Ruby's fingers stroked his cheek lovingly. "I'm sorry…my love…I don't know…if that…can happen. So…hold onto her, Eriol…don't let her go…no matter what. Promise me…you will be happy…"

"How can you ask me to do that? I can't promise you that…"

"Try..." She whispered.

He cupped her face with his hand and could only nod. He couldn't deny her her final wish.

"Can you…bring Madison…here?" She asked suddenly. "I want to…see her…"

Eriol nodded and slipped his hand away from hers. Tomoyo was sitting on the chair opposite the down when he opened it. She shot up and rubbed her hands together nervously. The distraught on Eriol's face broke her heart.

"She wants to see you." He said and to her surprise, reached out a hand for her to take. She looked at it and took it anxiously. He led her into the room and Tomoyo broke into a smile to see her awake.

He sat back down and took her hand. With her other hand Ruby reached for Tomoyo's.

"You gave me a shock back there." Tomoyo said softly and rubbed her read eyes.

Ruby smiled weakly at her and squeezed her hand. "Madison…thank you… for your…friendship."

Tomoyo furrowed her brows together. "Hey…don't talk like that." She tried to say lightly but the lump in her throat made it sound forced.. She didn't like the finality in Ruby's voice.

"I want you…to keep him sane…ok?" Ruby chuckled and Tomoyo felt her eyes stinging.

"Ruby…" Tomoyo breathed and clenched her jaw to keep her grief inside.

"You've been…so good to me…I've never…had a true friend…before you."

"Stop..." Tomoyo began to shake her head.

"I know…there's a war coming…" She said and turned to Eriol. "You need…to focus on getting through it…and surviving…" She squeezed both their hands. "And when you do…you both…be…happy…ok?"

Eriol and Tomoyo looked at each other. It was in that moment, Tomoyo understood that Ruby knew… Looking down at Ruby, they could see she didn't have much longer left. They both pushed their guilt aside and nodded.

Ruby's eyes felt heavy, giving way to a sweet release.

Holding their hands she exhaled with the most serene expression on her face Eriol had never seen before.

"It's so quiet…" She whispered. "…so…peaceful…"

Her chest rose and descended quietly, subtly. Her eyes, heavy, closed, and did not open again.

She was gone.

Eriol and Tomoyo stayed either side of Ruby, neither uttering a word while Ruby's lifeless body lay between them. Tomoyo was the first to move. Unwillingly slipping her hand out of Ruby's grasp. She walked around the bed and placed a hand on Eriol's shoulder. She did not know what to say, or how to comfort him when her own heart was breaking.

"I'll…I'll tell you mother…" Tomoyo said weakly, afraid if she uttered anything else she would crumble.

Eriol's hands suddenly flew up to clasp hers tightly. He looked up at her desperately. "Don't leave." He said weakly, one hand holding Ruby's, one holding Tomoyo's.

Nathala's words rang around in her mind. Eriol needed her. He needed someone to lean on.

Tomoyo caressed his head against her waist and sat beside him. They both stayed at Ruby's side, both wondering whether they truly could be happy and keep their promise to Ruby.

Even if they could, could they survive the war that was coming?

Perhaps it was fortunate that she would not live through the horrors that were to come.

X x x

The phone rang five times before it stopped abruptly.

Yue groaned and rolled over, his bones creaking as he struggled to bring himself to sit upright. As he reached to nurse his pounding head he knocked over an empty bottle of vodka and winced as it clanked twice before rolling away from him. Yue's stomach lurched at the stale smell of alcohol contaminating the room.

His blurred vision was slow to sharpen as the ache in his head intensified with the effort.

"Ugh," He moaned and sighed when he saw his apartment was thrashed, almost looking like a break in. But no, unfortunately it was his own doing.

From somewhere in the opposite side of the room, his phone began to ring again. Despite his raging hangover, he practically sprang to him feet and was over to it in seconds. His fingers trembled as he tore through the blankets trying to locate it again.

 _Maybe it's Toya_. He thought. _Maybe he's sorry, maybe he didn't mean all those things he said. What if he wanted Yue back? To try again? Could Yue really do that knowing Toya's true intentions?_

He looked at his phone and almost collapsed in disappointment. It was his secretary, Naoko. Yue hadn't shown up for work in four days, it was starting to worry everyone in the office as Utopia day was approaching.

Yue would have rolled over again, only for the seven missed calls from Sakura and four voicemails.

 _Voicemail 1: 'Yue, it's Sakura. I know I'm not supposed to call you in case it's an emergency but…I was just wondering if you've any update about the…you know…anyway, call me back._

 _Voicemail 2: 'Me again. Where are you? South is on lockdown they won't let me anywhere near work. Call me.'_

Yue felt guilt sink into his stomach. He knew he was letting her down. They were in this thing together, planned it in detail. Yet, it took Toya breaking his heart to send Yue onto a rampage.

 _Voicemail 3: 'Yue, seriously! Pick up your phone. Are you deserting me? You know I can't do this by myself. Where are you?'_

Yue rubbed his eyes. Sakura's voicemails were getting progressively worse. But the last one spurred him into immediate action.

 _Voicemail 4: 'Yue! Yue they…Yue they took him! Please, please help me! I-I don't know what to do! They won't let me leave or see him-"_

The voicemail cut off and Yue's blood turned cold instantly.

X x x

Sakura kept her head down as she hurriedly turned the corner.

Somewhere behind her she could hear Syaoran's truck reluctantly take off in the opposite direction.

She saw a flash of blue flickering on and off in the distance around the corner. Her heart beat quickened as she speedily made her way around the bend only to stop in her tracks. Her blood ran cold.

There were two police cars outside her home blocking the front gate. Military police.

Her shaky knees managed to stumble towards her front gate before an arm shot out to stop her.

"Wow, ma'am. No entry." He said not even looking down at her.

"It's my house!" She shouted up at him and ducked under his arm faster than he could react.

Sakura felt her stomach twist. She should have run away. What if they found something on her? What if the charade was over so close to when they were almost finished?

Sakura began to race into the house when her father emerged. She almost collapsed in relief, but he was not alone. Fujitaka's wrists were cuffed behind his back, his face badly beaten. He struggled to keep his head up as one eye was almost swollen shut.

"Dad..." She whispered in shock and almost lunged towards him when a set of rough hands clamped her upper arms and reeled her back.

"Let go!" She roared as she was taken roughly outside the gate.

The soldier held on tightly as Fujitaka was half dragged past her, his head low almost unconscious.

"Dad!" She screamed. "Dad!"

Fujitaka's neck strained as he tried to locate his daughter. His feet dragged beneath him as the soldiers relentlessly carried him across the path.

"Why are you taking him!? He hasn't done anything wrong-"

"Sakura!" Fujitaka called. " _Atte nen!_ (Don't say anything.)"

Sakura stood there with tears in her eyes and mouth open in shock. If her father used _Mahr Brethain_ openly in front of soldiers to silence her, it meant this was very bad.

She struggled to break free but the nameless soldier held her in place with ease.

"You're making a scene."

Sakura gritted her teeth when she heard that voice.

She wished she didn't turn her head to see Lieutenant General Mizuki standing there with a the faintest of grins behind her smooth face. She had her arms crossed underneath her long trench coat. She did not have time to tie her hair up when she got the phone call from Lieutenant Meiling Li.

"Whatever reason you have for doing this, you've got it wrong." Sakura said shaking with anger. "My father had done nothing wrong and you know it."

Mizuki allowed Sakura's words to hover in the cold air and, resisting the urge to smile she replied. "Your father is being arrested on the charge of harbouring and aiding a wanted criminal. His knowledge of it and deliberate decision not to inform the military police is an act of treason. He is also being arrested on speculation of planning the attack on the royal family, spreading false slander on the military and for orchestrating plans to sabotage the regime and government."

"That's a lie!" She retaliated.

"We have a witness. Claims to have seen your father and brother colluding and making very serious threats to the stability of Tomoeda."

"Bullshit." Sakura spat.

Within a second, Mizuki's smooth leather gloved hand grabbed Sakura by the jaw and slammed her back into the wall. Sakura didn't catch her breath before Mizuki's face appeared inches from her own, and Sakura saw the intensity blazing behind Mizuki's copper coloured eyes.

"Be careful, little one." She purred and tightened her grip around Sakura's neck. "I'm just itching to put you behind bars too."

"Why don't you then?" Sakura dared.

Mizuki's eyes flickered for a moment towards the gathering crowds of Easterners, who had awoken with all the noise and were watching very carefully. Witnesses. The East was unstable enough.

Mizuki looked down at Sakura, who she should have taken care off weeks ago before her reputation made her untouchable. Had tensions not been so high in the East, Mizuki would have happily taken Sakura to Base and watch her crumble in an interrogation room.

Mizuki released her. If Sakura was involved like her father, Mizuki was confident she'd slip up all on her own, and possibly lead her to Toya himself.

"Where are you taking him!?" Sakura asked desperately and rubbed her sore neck.

"I cannot disclose that information." Mizuki said in a sterile and fixed her cap on her head.

Sakura's stomach dropped as she watched on completely helpless as Fujitaka was pushed into the back of a police van like a criminal.

"Kinomoto Sakura, you are officially under house arrest until we are satisfied that your father had no involvement with any wanted criminals."

Sakura barely digested any of Mizuki's words as she was violently grabbed from both sides and ushered into her home. The last thing she saw was Mizuki's winning smirk as her father was carried away.

They threw her into the hallway. Old wounds inflicted by Toya flared up on impact and she winced and clutched her ribs. She scrambled to her feet and bolted towards the closing door. It was slammed in her face and a small cry escaped her mouth with the deafening silence that followed. Slumping down on the floor she huddled her knees to her chin.

Tears threatened to break through. She clawed her hands through her hair with panic.

None of it made sense, why her father? It was her, why didn't they take her?

Sakura regretted listening to her father. Why didn't she just confess? Why did she not speak up and save him? Take his place.

The house was so silent, they had cut off the electricity. She couldn't even ring Syaoran…not that she should. There were eyes everywhere now.

She had to think quick. Logically in her head she knew they'd be back to sweep the house again.

She bolted upstairs and retrieved the phone she secretly kept and dialled the one number stored on it.

"Yue! Yue they…Yue they took him! Please, please help me! I-I don't know what to do! They won't let me leave or see him-" She ended the call abruptly when the front door opened and more soldiers swept in.

X x x

Syaoran barged through the interrogation chambers, his blood both turned to ice and raged at the same time.

He had barely walked onto the grounds of Base when he had heard the breaking news. He had to confirm it with his own eyes. There must have been a mistake. They were so careful not to get caught. How could this have happened?

The interrogation sector was buzzing with the breakthrough; Kinomoto Fujitaka, arrested and detained at 2:08am.

Syaoran abused his access card and stormed into the restricted access section before he was caught. He walked all the way down the corridor, looking into the window of every interrogation room. He almost felt relieve until he came to the second last room where Fujitaka, almost unrecognizable from his bloodied face, sat lopsided on a cold metal chair. Opposite him, Lieutenant Meiling Li sat with her back to him cross-armed. He knew there'd be a smug look smeared all over her face.

Syaoran entered, wide eyed. He tried to remain neutral, but inside he was bursting to ask the 'why' questions. If Fujitaka recognized him, his bruising face did not show it.

"Lieutenant Colonel." Meiling said in a voice of distain and a raised eyebrow. "Something I can help you with?"

Syaoran tried not to shake with rage at her indifference towards him.

"I just came to get an overview of the situation." He said, trying to hold an appropriate amount of neutrality. His stomach turned. Have they taken Sakura too?

"We have evidence to believe Mr Kinomoto knows the whereabout of Toya. They were caught conspiring."

Syaoran looked at Fujitaka, who made eye contact for a second.

"I have a hard time believing," Meiling said coolly. "That you acted alone. Tell me, as a blacklisted terrorist, Mr Kinomoto, did you have an accomplice? Your daughter seems awfully concerned with Western politics-"

"You have evidence of this?" Syaoran butted in too hastily.

Meiling looked back at him surprised and annoyed he was interrupting her interrogation. Syaoran kicked himself. He had to restrain. But the thoughts that Sakura may be somewhere in this building too…he broke into sweat and panic.

A few seconds passed by them, thick tension hovered in the air. Meiling was too well trained not to nitice something incredibly off with Syaoran's presence. Finally, Meiling unclenched her jaw and said, "No, our witness did not mention her."

"Witness?"

Meiling rolled her eyes. "Yes. The one who saw Toya at the Kinomoto residence. That one." Meiling said and pointed towards the glass of the door behind him.

Syaoran turned his head and his nervous stance hardened as his eyes met an all too familiar pair of pasty grey ones that reflected a well-found fear. Yukito gulped and resisted the urge to bolt past the window and out of Syaoran's murderous glare.

Whatever bragging Yukito was doing moments ago to the accompanying soldier had evaporated into a petrified silence. Even when he looked away, he could feel Syaoran's glare on the back of his neck. Syaoran felt a rage stir in his stomach and this time, Sakura was not here to stop him acting upon it.

"How can you be sure he's telling the truth?" Syaoran asked, trying to keep his voice from trembling anger.

"Camera footage of the night confirms Toya was in that neighbourhood at the time the witness said. His car was also in the area." Meiling snapped, infuriated Syaoran was questioning her.

Both Meiling and Syaoran looked up when they heard Fujitaka moan in an attempt to speak. He winced and clutched his side in the deep pain coursing through him. The soldiers showed no mercy in his interrogation.

"Something you want to say, old man?" Meiling said sharply and had he pen ready to scribble down a confession.

"I…." Fujitaka grunted and coughed. Syaoran held his breath and thought about the possibilities of knocking Meiling out and stowing Fujitaka out of the facility. But before he could even finish the thought he knew it was useless. "I did it." He confessed.

Meiling peeled her lips back in glee. "And what is _it_ you did?" She asked for clarification, tipping her head forward in anticipation. Fujitaka sighed and strained to make eye contact with Syaoran. "All of it. Everything you said. I did it, alone."

He didn't even finish his sentence before Meiling had jotted it down already in ecstasy at the promotion Mizuki would give her for this.

"But my daughter," he croaked. "She doesn't know." Then Fujitaka looked directly at Syaoran. "She has nothing to do with this. So she should be safe. Can you tell me she will be safe?" He tried to phrase it towards Meiling, but Syaoran got the message. Thing were coming to conflict now, Syaoran must keep Sakura safe.

"Your daughter's status is still in question." Meiling mumbled. "Our witness might have his memory jogged. He was very fuzzy when it came to Ms Kinomoto's whereabout that night in question."

Syaoran felt himself go to high alert and turned to leave, unable to do anything more for Fujitaka. He couldn't save him, but he'd do what he could to save Sakura.

Syaoran set off with murderous intents.

X x x

 _Close._ Yukito thought. _Way too close. If that Lieutenant Colonel had me alone…'_ Yukito shuddered and then scowled. How could Sakura have pined for _that_ kind of man? In his short time of being there, Yukito did not think much of Base. He loathed its stiff, glum buildings and the never-ending barking of orders that echoed over rolling tanks and spluttery engines.

Base was dirty, he thought. With all its soldiers running around like grunts. It was not a place for Yukito. He fixed his tie. Soon, _soon_ he'd be in the North, where the grunts would be slaving away for him and _his_ kind of people.

To the left and right of him, two cadets escorted Yukito to his car. They were supposed to be there for protection, but Yukito felt in the presence of such young teenagers that his safety could easily be compromised was it not for the two guns strapped to their belt.

They had exited to the car park and the noise of base was heavily muted behind the walls of HQ. The only sound now under the dark night were the cadet's boots trampling the ground in even pace…until Yukito picked up a third set of tracks coming towards them more hastily.

Suddenly the cadets halted.

Puzzled and annoyed, Yukito turned around and wished he didn't.

Syaoran showed no signs of slowing his pace as the gap between him and Yukito closed up, sending Yukito's heart rate thumping and the sweat on his neck to suddenly break out. He staggered backwards at the frighteningly vexed expression on Syaoran face.

"S-s-s-stay where you are!" Yukito said losing all confidence in his plan. "I mean it!" He shouted in a high-pitched voice. "They will shoot you if you touch me!" Yukito pushed the cadets in front of him as limp shield between Syaoran and him.

Syaoran did not slow down. "Stand down!" He barked at the cadets who, without a hint of hesitation, stood back and saluted him.

Yukito's jaw dropped and his sweaty palms began to shake violently. Weak kneed and petrified, Yukito backed away into a weak run. He could hear Syaoran boots, not gaining or losing speed behind him. Yukito whimpered as he dug into his pockets to find his car keys. He dropped them twice and his hands shook too aggressively to fit the key into the lock.

He pressed his back against the car and held his hands out helplessly.

"No-now wait! It is not how it seems, if you will just listen-"

Yukito was violently cut off when Syaoran fist reeled back and crushed down onto the bridge of Yukito's nose. Yukito tumbled to the ground and before he could react, Syaoran wordlessly delivered a second punch to the same spot.

Yukito wailed and spluttered as he choked on the blood flushing into his sinuses.

"H-help me!" He begged the cadets who stood there silently still not reacting to their violent commander.

"No one will help you." Syaoran said in a dark and low voice that made Yukito's skin crawl in fright.

Syaoran bent down and threw him against the car door. Before Yukito could speak, Syaoran clamped a palm down hard on his mouth and cut off his air supply. Yukito chocked and frayed in panic as his struggled to breathe through his broken nose.

"I'm going to kill you now." Syaoran said with a disturbingly calm expression on his face. "I've been aching to do it for a long, long time."

Yukito flapped his limbs about, gasping for air.

"But first," Syaoran continued, unfazed by Yukto's panic. "I need to know what you told Meiling. If you comply, I promise, I will kill you quicker."

Yukito's eyes bulged and when Syaoran released his mouth Yukito gagged to get air. "I've told them nothing about her, yet." Yukito wheezed. "They practically begged me to though. They were even going to bribe me to say that that bitch was involved."

The back of Yukito's head was slammed against the car window and he groaned in pain. "Whoops, I forgot. You guys are in love, aren't you?" He snickered through the pain. Yukito saw a flash of silver from the corner of his eye before Syaoran plunged it down onto Yukito's shoulder. He cemented a hand over Yukito's mouth to muffle his ferocious wails of pain.

"I asked you a question." Syaoran whispered into Yukito's ear. "Why didn't you? Why did you say nothing?" Syaoran hissed into his face. "You've already handed her father a death sentence, why didn't you finish her off too?"

Tears of pain rolled down Yukito's cheeks as he struggled to breath through the intense pain. "Insurance." He muttered.

"You need to speak up."

"Insurance!" Yukito barked again. "I wanted to hurt her. Hurt her like she hurt me, for humiliating me." Yukito admitted. He wanted Sakura to suffer for the humiliation she'd caused Yukito over the years, for the countless times he was made a loser by her refusal to be with him or acknowledge him. For choosing a dirty, soldier over the potential Yukito thought he possessed. He could have condemned Sakura too, but a woman like her would probably revel in that infamy, so he targeted her father, her only family left. He knew how tortured and guilty she'd feel all alone in her house arrest. He also knew that a direct kill on Sakura would lead Syaoran to hunt him down. Fujitaka was the easier target to get to Sakura.

"I knew _you_ probably wouldn't let me away with it." Yukito sniffled. "So, I won't confess she had anything to do with Toya, if you just leave me be. Let my transferral to the North go through and I'll just get on with my new life up there. You'll never have to see me again. If you touch me, I'll tell the military everything! I'll even tell them you're involved! That you're plotting with Toya!"

Syaoran didn't even blink at Yukito's threats which made him panic. The plan seemed flawless to Yukito. But in his mind, he didn't count on Syaoran getting him and cornering him like this, and he didn't think the cadets would allow him to be subjected to this torture. It was not turning out in Yukito's favour.

"Do you think," Syaoran said calmly. "That I'd let you have a second's peace? Whether it's the north, or any side of the walls, I won't let a single day go by where you will find peace. I will be following you everywhere you go, no matter what you do. You will never be happy after what you just did."

Yukito tried to gulp but the glare in Syaoran's eyes was paralysing him into silence. "That is, if I were to let you live."

"N-n-n-no wait!" Yuktio protested. "You two, protect me!" He shouted at the silent cadets.

"From our first meeting, you seemed to have underestimated me. It's OK, many people do." As Syaoran spoke, his fingers began to squeeze around Yuktio's throat tighter and tighter. "But one thing you should never underestimate, is the length's I will go to for Sakura. And how many people I will kill, for her. And I'd be lying," He said in a low and heavy voice. "If I said I haven't imagined your death many, many times. So, I think maybe, this will be for more for my sake, than for Sakura's."

Yukito's realized the biggest flaw in his plan of revenge against Sakura, it was underestimating Syaoran. Soldiers were always using Eastern women for sexual gain and exploitation, he didn't think for a second that Syaoran would be much different. In his jealous mind, Yukito had pinned their romance as one-sided on Sakura's part. That was his downfall, and Syaoran would let him know that.

Yuktio's face began to turn purple under Syaoran's strain and for once, Syaoran felt a dark and murderous streak in him he never thought was there. The only explanation was it must have come from his father.

A cluster of voices coming from the path beyond them broke Syaoran's concentration. He could hear boots as a unit of troops were coming back from their round of surveillance. Syaoran looked around him. There would be nowhere to dump Yue's body on time and leave before they came. He wouldn't be able to buy their silence like he could the cadets.

He burned his eyes into Yukito's and hissed lowly.

"I wouldn't sleep so soundly tonight. You've made your insignificant life that much harder." He could feel Yukito tremble under his grip and when he released him and took his knife out of his shoulder, Yue scrambled into his car and hid his head between him knees.

Syaoran turned away before the troops could find him.

"Follow him." He ordered the silent cadets as he passed them. Through his cadets, Syaoran wouldn't let Yukito out of his sight.

His fury was telling him to follow Yukito home himself, torture him like he saw older troops do to dissidents when he was a child, but his mind, which Sakura's was always on, brought him back to task.

He needed to find her before the General did.

X x x


End file.
